Welcome to Fatherhood
by I'mNotCleverLoL
Summary: So, I'm Dean Winchesters 22 year old daughter, Mary. Turns out, he's 29. Wanna know how that happened? I kinda time traveled back to 2009 to stop something horrible from happening in the future. Needless to say that dear old Dad's not so happy about it. But you gotta do what you gotta do for family, right? I just didn't figure things would change to this extreme.
1. Chapter 1

**_So I thought it might be cool to write a story where Dean had a daughter, it kinda just popped into my head. Anyway, I don't own supernatural._**

* * *

So, let's get started and get this over with. My name's Mary Winchester, and no- Not the Mother of Sam and Dean Winchester, but actually the daughter of, well... Dean. Basically I'm the result of a one night stand when my Dad was in his late forties, and a crap Mother that decided to pretty much abandon me after tracking down my Father and dumping me with him. I'm not a child, far from it actually, to get specific I'm twenty two now, and apparently have a hell of a lot of my Dad in me. Not to mention that I'm the spitting image of him, ya know, minus the facial hair and well, being a dude.

Let's just say that I'm not like most chicks. I wasn't raised on My little Pony, playing with barbies or whatever it is that normal girls do. I was raised a hunter- And overall, my life wasn't half bad. Sure, there were some touchy moments here and there, some dangerous crap that would scare the living daylights outa normal girls, but I was happy... Considering. I had my Dad, I had my Uncle Sam, things were normal... Until I hit twenty two.

It was no big lie that Dad was getting up there in years, he was slowing down- Wasn't as wiry, his reflexes were basically shot, his eye site fried. Basically he shouldn't have been hunting anymore being well up in his sixties, but you know how my Dad is- He refused to acknowledge that the job was killing him until it was too late.

To make a long story short, something went horribly horribly wrong, he went left when he should have went right, and BAM- He took a shot straight to the chest. It was after watching him choke on his own blood and die that I knew I had to do something, I had to go back and change things... Honestly, it didn't have to end up like this, but according to Cas- Oh yeah, Cas was still around, even then, I honestly didn't think the dude was going anywhere- But according to him, the road that led up to this point could have been completely different. Certain events in the past, certain choices made, all led up this horrible moment that stemmed from my deepest nightmares. Basically what he told me was that things could have ended differently. Sure, it would have been simple for him to just resurrect my Dad, but because of those certain roads taken in the past- It would always have the same end results... Dad would die bloody, Sam would, well... Sam's fate wasn't much better, I'll just say that.

So I made plans, that really were based purely on desperation and grief at that point, and I had to practically beg Cas to agree to it- Because while sure you could go back and redo all those past mistakes, it could drastically alter any other future events. Basically, it could make things a hell of a lot worse in the end, but you know what? I was willing to take the risk. Because it's my Dad we're talking about, my Uncle. My damned family! So, I did it... I asked, or, well more along the lines of yelled at Cas to send me back. And, he did, with extreme reluctance. You see, it wasn't so much trying to prevent my Dads death as my motivation for going back, even though that was reason enough- It was what exactly had caused his death in the first place.

I packed a bag, and made sure to dress in clothes that were in style back in the year 2009, gave myself a reasonably acceptable hairstyle, which wasn't difficult. I kept my hair cut short, pixie style or whatever, it made it easier to fight without having hair flying in your face. But anyways, I'm getting sidetracked. After everything was ready, Cas tried to talk me out of it before zipping me back to October of 2009.

And well, first thoughts once I set eyes on... Wherever the hell Cas had zapped me was, what the fuck do I do now? From what he had told me, this was the year my Dad was brought back from hell, which meant Cas was already on the scene. He made sure to do it that way, because he figured I would have a hell of a time in convincing Dad and Sam that I was who I said I was, so maybe it would be best if I talked to him first. He told me to pray to him, to tell him the situation, and hopefully if he wasn't being a dick bag, he'd show up. So, that's what I did after dropping my duffel on the side of the road.

"Ok, here goes..." I sighed. "Castiel, so here's the thing. I know at the moment you don't know me, and you're probably wondering who the hell this crazy chick is praying to you, but... Let's just say that you and me, we kinda know each other... From the future. And future you zapped me back here. So, if you could shimmy your ass down here pronto, I'd appreciate it."

I shifted my eyes around the area, not moving as a semi blew right on past. It felt like minutes passed that I stood baking in the sun, before I heard a whoosh from behind me. Yeah, I knew that whoosh, so I turned quickly and felt my brow arch.

"Dude," I said, snickering. "Nice trench coat."

Cas furrowed his brows at me. "Who are you? How did you know my name?"

I eyed him up and down, unable to keep myself from chuckling. The Cas I knew in the future was pretty much normal enough, and according to my Dad had really lightened up over the decades. This guy though... He looked stiff and emotionless, like he had a broomstick stuck up his butt. Not to mention that he was wearing a trench coat and suit. Definitely not the Cas I knew.

"Didn't you hear what I said?" I replied, finally. "I said, that we know each other in the future, and you sent me back here."

His brows furrowed. "What's your name?"

I was prepared for this, and so was future Cas, so I pulled a note from my pocket that Cas had written. He told me that when this moment happened to just shut up and give him the note, and that would solve everything, so... I did. I handed him the letter and sat back, silent- As he pulled it open and scaled over the words that were written in Enochian.

Once he read it, I noticed his face go completely devoid of whatever sort of expression he might have had previously, before gazing up at me in confusion.

"You're the daughter of Dean Winchester?" He asked.

"Yep, shocker right? So, uh... We're on the same page then? Ya know, future you writing the note and all, did he fill you in on everything?"

He immediately disintegrated the letter into a tiny fireball.

"Yes, I believe so. At least with your identity, but I didn't seem to write down why exactly you've come back here?"

I sighed deeply, trying to shield my eyes from the hot sun. "Well, that's kinda of a disturbing story, dude... Basically, Dad and Sam get into some trouble in the future, bad bad trouble. Dad got killed and Sammy..." I paused, staring down at the ground. "Sammy got taken over, I'll just say that."

"Taken over? By what exactly?"

"I'm not supposed to talk about it. You told me to keep as many details about the future to myself as possible, or else I might fuck everything up."

"So you've returned here in hopes of altering the timeline." He nodded. "That could be dangerous. I'm struggling to understand how I could have allowed this to happen. I should have known better."

"Yeah, well... You're not as gung ho about obeying rules in the future, Cas. Things changed."

"Apparently so. If I were wise I'd simply send you back to your own year and forget this entire thing, but..." He stared at the remnants of the note that was basically ash. "If I sent you back here then I must have felt it was for good reason."

"Awesome, so... We won't have any issues then."

"What's your name?"

"Oh, yeah sorry. Forgot about that. It's Mary." He fell silent, as he stared off in the distance. "So... Where are they?"

"What?"

"My Dad and Sammy... Where are they?"

He sighed deeply. "They're currently working a case in Michigan. I don't believe it would be wise for you to arrive now at all times. It might be best to wait."

"Why?"

"You don't believe that Dean seeing his daughter that came back from the future would be alarming?" His brows rose. "It would be a shock, he wouldn't be able to focus on what he's trying to accomplish."

I grumbled under my breath. "Yeah, maybe... So when can I meet up with them?"

"Once they're through hunting the witch in question would probably be best, Mary."

Unfortunately he was probably right about that. And as impatient I was to see my Dad again, I didn't wanna completely fuck up his job and risk getting him or Sam hurt.

"Yeah alright I guess." I pursed my lips. "So... What was written on the note, huh? You looked pretty shocked yourself there, man."

He eyed me for a moment, and it was kinda hard to read what might have been going through his head considering his face was blank.

"Apparently my course of action as of right now wasn't considered very... Wise. I warned myself to stop, and to start listening to what my conscience was telling me. According to what I wrote... I... Need to break ranks, and side with Sam and Dean." He shook his head. "Had I not written the letter myself I would find all of this very hard to believe." I only nodded and he went on. "And, I also stated that I'm to watch out for you... I gather that you and I were friends?"

"You could say that." I smirked. Oh, did I forgot to mention that future Cas and I were a little more than friends? Oops.

I wasn't sure what was written on the note, but seeing is that the dude refused to look at me I couldn't help but wonder if future Cas had shared that tasty little tid bit. But that was the least of my concerns right now. I had been given the heads up by Cas himself that in the past he had been kind of a horses ass, and not to expect anything to happen, at least for a long long while. Which, for the record, I was ok with. My main concerns were my Dad and Sam.

"Well I can't stay here on the side of the road until their job is done." I said, grabbing my duffel. "So, could you maybe... Take me somewhere?"

He clearly didn't know what the hell to do, but since I couldn't stay out in the middle of no where he zapped me to the next best place, which was a random motel in some random town. I booked a room and got settled in, having no choice but to sit and try to be patient. I would get to meet up with Dad and Sam soon enough, and not only that, but the younger versions of them. Hell, they both weren't much older than I was now. Oh yeah, this was definitely going to be an interesting experience.

* * *

So, whatever Dad and Sam were doing in Michigan took a couple days to be over and done with. Cas popped in every now and then to make sure I was staying out of trouble, and relaying information. Apparently they had some kind of issue with the witch, and a demon was let loose when he wasn't supposed to be. Needless to say that both of them weren't exactly happy. According to Cas he hadn't informed them of little old me, which wasn't surprising. I mean, how do you go up to a dude that's only, what 29? And tell him that he has a 22 year old daughter. Basically I think he was just going to pop me up during the most random of times with no explanation at all. God, this was gonna be a surprise, huh? And, knowing my Dad, he wasn't gonna be happy about it. In fact, I knew he'd be pissed, he'd think this was some kind of weird joke. He'd think I was a monster, a demon, or some other freaky bastard. Anything other than believing I was actually his kid from the future.

Dad had me late in life, as I said his late forties was when I was born, but the one thing he never ever did was make me feel like I wasn't wanted. No, he wasn't Mike Brady, or Dr. Huxtable, meaning we didn't have lovey dovey Father daughter moments, but he was a damn good Dad. He was there for me whenever I needed him, he protected me and loved me in the only way he knew how. But... This was different now. This wasn't the Dad I knew, this was the young cocky dude that thought he knew everything. Which is why I was smart, and packed several photos of he and I. There were some when I was a kid, barely a toddler, we were sitting on the hood of his impala, another when I was thirteen and he had taken me bow hunting and decided he wanted to preserve the moment in a picture. A few other random things, like me and Sam reading over books at the bunker, or the one time that Dad thought it would be funny to celebrate Christmas by decorating Cas with tinsel. Needless to say the angel was not amused, and the photo clearly showed that. Basically, I had what I felt was all the evidence I needed to show I was who I said I was. Yes, I knew it would take a while for Dad to adjust, but... He would eventually. At least I hoped so.

When Cas finally decided it was time to get this over with, he explained that he would zap me to the town they were currently hauled up in, and allow me to do things on my own terms. He would be there to back up my claims and help out, but he had no idea how to handle a situation like this- Which was understandable, I couldn't expect him to do everything now could I?

So, I calmed my nerves after taking a few deep breaths and nodded to him, as he zapped me away from my motel room and directly in front of a small crowded diner.

Once I saw the impala parked out front I felt my heart flutter. A slew of memories bombarded me from out of no where. The late nights I passed out in the backseat as we drove from job to job, the time Dad taught me how to drive when I was fourteen- The time he got pissed at me for taking off in his car to go see a movie without telling him. God... So crazy, this was definitely a mind trip.

I took a small circle and noticed that Cas hadn't stayed with me at the diner which made me grumble. Big chicken, I guess he didn't want to hear Dad rant and rave.

Ok, so I knew that I couldn't just approach him and flat out say "Hi daddy!" I needed to do this in a way that wouldn't result in a gun being pointed in my face. I decided, for the moment, that as much as I hated the thought, I needed to not let him know I was his daughter... At least not yet.

I planned this from the get go, sorted it out almost perfectly as I stepped into the diner and let my eyes scale the room. When my eye settled on a gigantor of a dude sitting in a booth my eyes went wide. It was Sammy, a young Sam, but Sammy none the less. First thoughts were, his hair was long, what the fuck? What's up with that? He was clicking around on his laptop, while munching on a salad.

Dad? I didn't see him right off, but there was a second plate on the table that held a bacon cheeseburger and fries that hadn't been touched yet.

Best guess, Dad was in the crapper. And I was right when suddenly he waltzed on past me and slid into the booth in front of Sam.

Holy crap... This was weird as fuck. I was used to seeing my Dad as, well... A _Dad_, graying hair, wrinkles around the eyes and mouth, a little pudge in the belly. Not young Dad, a guy young enough to be my _brother_. I had never seen any pictures of Sammy or Dad when they were young, simply because they didn't have any. But now that I could see them face to face, I knew that the resemblance between Dad and I wouldn't go unnoticed. We were so similar people would be inclined to believe we were twins. Same full lips, same eyes, freckles, hair color. Hell, my short hair made it even more obvious we were related somehow.

This was tripping me out, and I knew if I didn't move soon then I would probably chicken out entirely. So, with another deep breath I hardened my expression and started over towards their table, stopping and staring down at them with a knot in my throat.

Of course they noticed me instantly, I mean... How could they not? I was standing there like some freak job gawking at them with a slack jawed expression.

"Uh..." Dad said. "Can we help you?"

Oh god I missed that gruff voice.

"Are you..." I said, swallowing. "Are you Dean Winchester?"

His brows rose and Sam shifted in his seat.

"Who's askin?" Dad replied.

"My name's Mary... I, um... Well..." After a deep breath I reached into my pocket and pulled out the letter. The letter that I had no intention of using. The letter that future Cas had forged to look identical to John Winchester, my Grandpas, handwriting. It was written just in case something didn't go according to plan. "I'm sure that'll explain things."

Dad snatched the letter from my hands and as soon as he opened it and saw the handwriting I saw his expression go flat.

"Son of a bitch... It's from Dad." He said, and Sammy instantly leaned forward.

"What's it say?" He asked.

He scaled the writing quickly, then sat back still looking just as flabbergasted as before.

"Son of a bitch..." He repeated.

"What?" Sam reached over and grabbed the letter, reading it over now, his eyes immediately went up to mine afterwards. "No way."

"Who the hell are you, really?" Dad barked. "Is this some kind of weird ass joke? You expect us to fall for that crap?"

"Uh..." I mumbled. "But the letter?"

"Gotta be forgery, there ain't no way that's real. What the hell is this? Who are you?"

"I told you... My name's Mary... Winchester."

He glared at me, and instantly I was taken back to all the times as a kid when I received that pissed off expression whenever I'd done something stupid.

"Dean..." Sam breathed out. "Look, I'm just as surprised as you are, but... That's Dad's handwriting, and well... Look at her."

"This is crap, Sam!" Dad snapped back. "We don't have a friggin sister!" He stood and pretty much towered over me. "I don't know what the hell you're trying to do, but if you wanna keep that head of yours I'd suggest turning around and walking away... Right now."

Yeah, this was going exactly the way I thought it would. And I could only imagine what mighta happened had I actually told him I was his daughter, and not his sister.

He must have expected for me to cower or back away in fear, but that's just not my personality. I get it from my _Dad_, what can I say.

"Listen, chuckles-" I chest bumped him. "I didn't ask for any of this crap, just like you didn't. Believe me if I had it my way I never woulda come and found you guys, but I didn't really have any choice. I haven't heard from Dad in a while now, and he told me that if something like that happened, then I was to come and find my brothers, which is what I did."

"Hey, hey," Sam stood now and slipped an arm between us. "Everyone just calm down, ok? I'm sure we can settle this without taring each others heads off... Right?" He took me by the arm gently. "Mary, sit down... We can talk about this. Let's figure things out."

"Don't tell me that you're falling for this, Sam?" Dean flopped back in his seat. "Don't you think that if we had a sister out there, that Dad woulda told us, huh?"

Sam shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. You know how Dad was, Dean- I wouldn't put something like this past him." Dean crossed his arms after that, turning his glares out the diner window to avoid looking at me. "Ok, Mary... Why don't you tell us where you came from?"

And so I started in with the rehearsed speech. "Well, I was born in Oklahoma, I'm twenty two, only child... My Mom died when I was young, so I was raised by a friend of our Dads."

"What friend?" Dean barked back.

"Pastor Jim." I lied, of course, knowing that this man had died a few years back so I wouldn't have to worry about them calling him for confirmation.

Sam nodded. "Well, we knew Pastor Jim, and he was a friend of Dads. So, where'd you go after he died?"

"Well, I did what Dad told me to do if something like that went wrong. I started moving, from town to town, state to state. I couldn't take the risk of stopping just in case whatever killed Jim came after me." I let out a sigh. "And after a while of Dad not contacting me, I figured something must have happened, so that's when I knew it was time to come and find you guys."

I just barely saw Dad roll his eyes at me. "This is crap... She could be makin all this up. There's no proof."

"Uh, Dean," Sam snickered. "I think _looking _at her is proof enough that she's related. You two are identical."

I sneered when Dad pouted and started to grumble. It's funny, even when he was older, in his late sixties, he still pouted like a five year old. It was just personality.

"Ok," He sat up. "You say you're our sister, so tell us somethin about Dad... Something that no one else would know?"

I sat back, huffing out a deep sigh. "Well, he wasn't born a hunter, for starters. He only started in with this life after your Mother died. Pinned to the ceiling in a nursery fire... Right?" Dad scowled bitterly. "And... The reason why that happened was because Sam was fed demon blood as a baby. Your Mom interrupted whatever was going down in the nursery, and because of it she was killed by the yellow eyed demon Azazel..." I arched my brows. "Is that specific enough?"

Sam nodded, giving an "I told you so" look to Dad, who refused to peel his eyes off the table.

"That ain't enough." Dad huffed. "Any hunter out there coulda known that and spilled the beans. Give us somethin else."

I rolled my eyes. "Wow, ok... You're just as paranoid as ever..." I caught myself and thankfully he didn't seem to catch that. "Jeez, I dunno, uh... Dad was in the marines? His Dad disappeared when he was a kid, what else do you want me to say? What else do I gotta do to prove that I'm Mary Winchester?"

Dad shrugged, and replied sarcastically. "I dunno, got any ID?"

Now I glared at him, if he wasn't my Dad I probably would have kicked him. "Listen... I don't wanna fight with you guys. I've heard about you my entire life, you could probably question me about your pasts and I'd know the answers to all of them."

"When's my birthday?" Dad replied, smirking.

"January 24th 1979."

He yet again grumbled. "Where'd Sammy go to college?"

"Stanford, really are we gonna keep going on with this?"

He sat back, resting his arm against the seat while keeping his lips pursed and refusing to look at me. "Ok one last thing." He then reached into his jacket and pulled out a flask, one that I knew would be full of holy water. "Take a swig of that."

I swiped the flask out of his hand and downed a huge mouthful, holding up my arms and giving him a "ha ha" face afterwards. Yeah, he wasn't happy about that either, since obviously I wasn't some crazy assed demon.

"Can I get you somethin, sweetie?" A waitress suddenly said by the table.

"She's not stayin." Dad barked back.

"Pie..." I said, ignoring Dad's glares. "Whatever's best."

She nodded, awkwardly moving away from the table before Sam chuckled.

"See, what'd I tell you, Dean? _Identical_. Like you two were cut from the same cloth."

"Shut up." Dad pushed his plate away, apparently I made him lose his appetite. "I'm still not fallin for this crap. There's really only one way I can think to settle this once and for all." He sat up, leaning over and staring me in the face. "I'm calling Cas."

"That's not necessary, Dean." Cas said, poofing beside the table. "I'm well aware of the situation."

Sam nodded, letting out a relieved sigh. "So. It's true? Mary's our sister?"

Cas' brows furrowed and he looked at me just long enough to see my panicked expression.

"Uh... Yes." Cas stood tall. "It was brought to my attention recently, I only hadn't the opportunity to inform you of it."

"Well, that's just friggin fantastic, Cas!" Dad bellowed. "You'd think that info like that coulda been shared a little sooner!"

"Well, I... I heard the news recently, as I stated. Two days ago as a matter of fact. And I wanted to dig into it deeper to be certain it was really true before I came to you." He flicked his eyes to me. "I didn't know that she would meet you both before that time came."

The waitress returned with my pie and Cas was forced to sit beside Dad. For a moment I flashed back to the future, seeing them like that. I wasn't sure whether or not Dad considered Cas to be his best friend yet, judging by his expression right then I'd say no. But I knew it was only a matter of time.

"One thing I'm confused about." Sam said, as I dug into my pie. "We used to go and stay with Pastor Jim when we were kids. Whenever Dad would go off on a hunt and would be gone for longer than a couple days. Where were you during that time?"

I chewed my bite longer than I needed to so I could form some kind of believable answer. "Well, that was actually when Dad would come and have visits with me... He wasn't always going on jobs, catch my drift?"

"So you're sayin that Dad, what, kept you secret from us and then would ditch us with Pastor Jim so he could spend time with you?" Dad scrunched his brows. "Why do I find that hard to believe?"

I dropped my fork to the plate with a clink. "What, an angel telling you that I was your sister wasn't enough for your liking? What else do you gotta have?"

"How'd you know he was an angel?" Dad sneered and I felt my stomach drop. "I never said he was an angel... Neither did Sam."

I couldn't respond to that because there were no words... I tried to keep the panic from showing on my face, but it was at a poor attempt.

"I told her, Dean." Cas spoke. "Two days ago once I discovered who she was. Naturally I wanted to be certain she wasn't dangerous. I preformed all the tests that you would have and everything was normal. I told her I was an angel as well."

Sam still had the same puppy eyes when he was older, which was pretty much fascinating to me.

"Dean..." He sighed. "This is huge, I know. And it's crazy and hard to believe, but... What's it gonna take for you to acknowledge it? How many more angels are gonna have to jet down here and tell us she's not lying?" He gave me a comforting smile. "I think that instead of grilling her, we should be trying to get to know her... Don't you?"

I stared at my Dad with what I was sure was a hopeful gleam in my eyes. Yeah, I knew he wouldn't be willing to accept me so easily, he was gonna be grouchy and a major prick until he finally warmed up to me. But, right about that moment I was regretting not flat out telling him the truth. At least then I could actually call him "Dad" and not "Dean". This was going to take a long time to get used to.


	2. Chapter 2

I felt myself pouting at Dad giving me the cold shoulder. Yeah, he "accepted" that I was his sister or whatever, but that didn't mean he was happy about it. Hell, I knew that face, that stance, that binge drinking- It wasn't just being pissed, it was something much much more. He hated me... And yeah I knew it was stupid to let myself get upset over something like that, considering he didn't know the truth, but- How could I not be upset? It's my Dad we're talking about here. My Dad, the man I worshiped since the moment I was old enough to know what was what, hated my guts. I couldn't even be happy in the fact that I was with my Dad and Uncle, the only thing I could do was sit there and mope like a crying little girl.

Sam though, well- I wasn't sure if he "liked" me exactly, but at least he was making an _attempt _to be nice to me. I guess he felt bad that Dad was being such a dick, and tried to make up for it by talking to me and trying to learn about me.

Cas was confused of course as to why I didn't tell them the truth. I explained it as well as I could and he actually agreed that this might have been, as he phrased it, the better course of action. Telling Dean that he actually had a child might have altered the timeline to such an extreme that I might not have even been born at all. So, I guess for the moment this was as good as it was gonna get. Eventually I was gonna have to get down to why I actually came back here. I would need to tell them the truth, about what was gonna happen in the future. What Sam was doing here and now. I knew he was working with a demon named Ruby, that he was drinking demon blood and using his mind powers. I knew that eventually it would lead up to him killing Lilith, which was breaking the final seal and letting Lucifer out. I knew about all of this. It was just, ya know, actually trying to find a way to spit all this out without sounding like some crazy bitch was difficult. I couldn't tell Sam, that was for damned certain, the best person to tell would be Dad, but... Jeez, how does a girl actually do that when said Dad friggin hated her? He wouldn't believe me, I knew that much. He'd think I was up to something shady and probably try to gank me or something.

So it was hard... It wasn't a happy family reunion like I hoped it would be. I couldn't hug my Dad and tell him how happy I was to see him again, that I missed him like crazy after he died, that my life was meaningless and empty without him in it. I couldn't tell Sammy that I missed him either, that he was a damn good uncle. God, I couldn't even rely on Cas to make me feel better cause, as we all know, the dude had zip feelings for me at the moment. Basically... This sucked ass!

They tried to get on with their lives as well as possible, going back to what they had been doing before I came along. Which was hunting and preparing for the upcoming apocalypse. Late at night when I was supposed to be sleeping I'd catch Sam sneaking out to meet with Ruby. He'd be gone for hours, then return and slip into bed with Dad none the wiser. Cas wasn't here that often, he was off doing "angel" things I guess. Even though the note his future self gave him said that he needed to ditch his dick bag siblings and team up with us, I wasn't sure if he'd actually done that yet. But I could have been wrong.

I pretty much decided after a week of getting the cold shoulder from Dad, that if I wanted to have some kind of relationship with him then I was gonna have to try harder. I needed to make some kind of effort to spend some alone time with him, without making it awkward. Without us fighting, or him bitching at me for some insignificant tiny thing. Which of course, wasn't easy. He'd wanna go out for drinks, I'd ask if I could come- He'd of course say hell no and stomp out of the motel and leave me standing there like a lost puppy. I tried to offer to help out on jobs, he'd continue with the "hell no" response and make me sit in the fucking car. I offered to do the research, he'd tell me I sucked at it and that Sammy was better. No matter what I did, he just didn't seem to care.

He hated me. My god... My Dad hated me...

And it's not like I could suddenly fix things by telling him the truth. He'd only hate me more after that. Because I lied, I made him believe that their Dad had an illegitimate daughter out there somewhere. You don't just bounce back from a lie like that. I was a dumb ass, I should have told them the truth from the fucking get go.

First thing's first though, I figured- Was that I needed to find a way to tell Dad about Sam and what he was still doing. By this time I knew that Cas had already informed him of what Sam was doing, and for a while Dad believed that Sam had stopped with his freaky ass mind powers. For the moment he didn't know that Sammy was still at it, and eventually it would lead to Lucifer rising.

We had been driving all night and finally found a motel worth staying in when Cas and some angel I didn't recognize suddenly appeared. Judging by Cas' expression which was incredibly guilty, I knew that he _wasn't _taking heed of his future self's advice.

"What the hell is this?" Dad asked, dropping his bag on the table.

"You're needed." This new angel stated.

"Needed? We just got back from needed! In case you don't remember we've been out there getting our asses kicked tryin to save your damn seals!"

"You were raised from hell, to serve our purposes, boy... Don't test my patience."

"Yeah, and you know what? You still haven't told me what the hell I'm supposed to be doin for you? You wanna fill me in here?"

I stood in the background, watching the interaction with my heart in my stomach. Yep, Dad kept that fiery temper of his even into old age.

"Dean," Cas said, standing stiffly behind the new dick angel. "We understand this can be frustrating, but we've captured Alastair. We have reason to believe that he's responsible for angels being murdered."

Sam let out a gruff sigh. "What exactly does that have to do with us? You have Alastair, so why don't you just question him?"

"We have been, but we can't seem to make him talk." Cas replied.

"Which is why we need your brother," New angel went on. "We heard that he specializes in a certain skill, one that he happened to learn from Alastair himself."

"Torture?" Dad said, his eyes wide. "You've gotta be kidding me. Hell no, I won't do it!"

"I know this is a lot to ask of you, Dean..." Cas sighed.

"But we _don't _care!" Dick angel interrupted. "And who said anything about asking?"

And then suddenly they poofed away, taking my Dad with him.

"Dammit!" Sam shrieked, kicking at the table.

"What the hell... What are we gonna do now?" I tried to contain myself. "Who was that other angel?"

"No one good," Sam brushed his hair from his eyes. "His name's Uriel, and believe me, he's as big a dick as he looks."

"Well, we gotta find Da... Dean-" I quickly corrected. "We can't let him go through with this."

Sam leaned his hands against the table and stared off at the room, his shoulders tensed.

"Mary... I might have a way to find him, but... I need to know if I can trust you?" He said.

"Trust me? Dude, of course you can trust me."

"Just," He pulled his phone from his pocket. "Keep an open mind, ok?"

I only nodded, and watched as he dialed and waited for whoever to answer. "Yeah, Ruby-" I immediately tensed up, feeling my blood fill with rage. "I need your help. The angels... They took Dean, I don't know how to find him." He paused and I could hear a voice over the other end, which only made me more angry. "Yeah, you know where we are, how soon can you be here?" Another pause. "Ok, see you then."

After he hung up, I tried to act nonchalant. "Who was that?"

"A friend. She's gonna help us out. She knows some spells or something that can help us find him."

I nodded, crossing my arms over my chest, glaring at him with a look I was positive was identical to my Dads. He noticed, and only scrunched his brows but didn't question it.

It didn't take long for the bitch... I mean, Ruby, to show up. Maybe twenty minutes? After she stepped inside it took every ounce of restraint in me to not peel her pretty face off. She took one look at me and arched a dark brow.

"Is this the sister you were telling me about?" She asked.

"Yeah, Ruby... This is Mary." Sam pointed to me.

"Nice to meet you." I said, pretty much through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, we'll have to skip the sentiments and introductions right now. We got work to do." She moved over to the table and pulled a map from her bag, lying it out flat. "Ok, so stand back and let me do my business. It shouldn't take long."

I watched from the sidelines as she did some kind of witchy crap and chanted some sort of incantation before the map on the table suddenly burst into flames.

"Don't worry," She smirked, once she saw my expression. "The fire's our friend. Thankfully the angels don't ward themselves against things like this, but why would they? They're angels, anyone would be stupid to try and go up against them."

"And this'll lead us to Dean?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, it'll give us the exact address." She muttered something else witchy and said. "Out!" And the fire suddenly poofed away, leaving only a tiny fragment of the map in the middle of the table. She then jammed her index finger in the middle of it. "There... Dean's there."

Sam nodded, letting out a relieved huff of air. "Good, that's good, uh... Mary, you should drive the Impala to the location, I'll ride with Ruby."

"Why?" I scowled, even though I knew already what the fuck he was planning.

"We need to talk about some things. Just in case something might go wrong." He tried giving me a sweet innocent little smile, flashing those damn puppy dog eyes. "Is that ok?"

"Sure," I barked back. "But I don't think Dean will be very happy that I'm driving his baby."

"He'll get over it." He grabbed his bag. "Let's go."

* * *

I was seething the entire drive, watching the tail lights of Ruby's car with fire in my eyes. If Sammy hadn't of been in the car with her I would have ran her off the road. That bitch... I knew what was happening. He was chugging it down again, the friggin demon blood. He was gonna use his hulk mind powers to take down Alastair. No, I hadn't exactly heard about this from my Dad in the future, but it was a pretty good guess I thought. Yeah, maybe Sam thought he was doing what was right, he thought he was helping his brother, but jesus... If he only knew the aftermath of what he was doing.

That's when I made my mind up that after this whole ordeal was over, I was telling Dad the truth. Or at least, the partial truth. Ya know, at least the part about Sam and what the fuck he had been doing with Ruby, and what would become of it.

When we pulled into the parking lot of an abandoned factory, or some other sort of crapped out piece of shit that was supposed to be a building, I stopped behind Sam and climbed out. Sometime during the drive Ruby obviously hit the road, obviously scared of getting her ass nuked by the angels. Sam had a look on his face that was hard to read, but I couldn't help but think it was gruff and horrible, and full of red hot rage.

It actually startled me into not following for a moment, before he noticed and stopped a good ten feet from me.

"Mary, are you coming?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah..."

He hesitated. "Listen, I think we can both agree that we gotta do whatever we have to to get Dean outa there, right?" I nodded. "So, yet again I'll ask you to just have an open mind, ok? Don't be quick to judge."

I couldn't respond to that because he took off shortly after. I followed quickly, as we darted into the building and to the sound of screaming and glass shattering. When we burst through the door of a room where the fighting was coming from, the first thing I saw was Cas pinned against a pillar completely bloodied up and struggling against who I assumed was Alastair. My eyes scattered around the room until finally finding my Dad lying in a crumpled heap on the floor.

I rushed to him and crouched down, trying not to burst into tears as I felt for a pulse. He was alive, thankfully, but he was beaten to a bloody pulp.

"Dean?" I said, shaking him lightly. "Dean can you hear me?"

He didn't budge or make a sound, and I glanced over my shoulder long enough to see Sam had Alastair pinned against the wall now with nothing but his hand raised.

"I'm only going to ask you this once." Sam said. "Who's killing the angels?!"

Alastair, a horribly wicked looking thing of a man only sneered at my uncle, until Sam squeezed his hand into a fist and he immediately started shrieking in pain.

"Who's killing the angels?!" He repeated.

"I... D-on't... Know!" He screeched back. "Demons... A-aren't doing... It!"

"You're lying!" Sam shouted back.

"N-No! Lilith wouldn't kill a few angels..." He grinned. "She'd kill them all!"

I could only sit there stunned into silence, holding my Dads limp hand as Sam made a few more threats before announcing he could kill the demon. Cas' expression after that was pretty much the same as my own... Stunned... And we could do nothing but watch as Sam rose his hand a second time and snuffed out Alastair's life in a matter of seconds. His body slumped to the ground afterwards, his face frozen in a silent scream.

"Guys," I said, still fighting back tears. "Dean's really hurt."

Sam rushed over and knelt down beside me. "Cas, do something. Get us to a hospital!"

Thankfully Cas snapped out of it enough to come and zap us away from the building and to a hospital. And over the course of the next two hours Sam and I paced back and forth in the waiting room waiting to hear news on Dad. Cas had disappeared, claiming he had to check out something, not bothering to tell us what. So the only thing Sam and I could do was wait for news.

Not long after Cas took off did a Doctor come into the waiting room and announce that Dad was in desperate need of a blood transfusion, but they didn't have any that matched his blood type. Sam and me quickly offered to have ours checked, which didn't take long. And, well... I guess it would be a complete lie to say that Sam _wasn't _surprised to hear that I was a perfect match. Yeah, it was suspicious because that only ever happens with a parent and child situation. Sam gave me a strange glare after the announcement, and really, I had no way of explaining so chalked it up to some freak occurrence. But Sammy wasn't stupid, I could see the gears turning in his head already.

After everything was over and done with, Dad was hooked up to machines, one of which was breathing for him since he wasn't able to. I stood by his bed and wanted to grab his hand so badly, but couldn't- Because Sam would only grow even more suspicious. I just met them, I wasn't supposed to care about them that much already, especially since it was apparent Dad hated my guts. So I only stood there, with my tear filled eyes planted firmly on the floor while Sam continued to pace. He only stopped when Cas reappeared and he decided now was a good time to go and chew him out. I followed after them, stopping in the hallway just in time to hear Sam say, "Get in there, miracle, now."

"I can't..." Cas sighed.

"What do you mean you can't?" I snapped back. "Get your ass in there and heal him!"

"You don't understand, I'm not supposed to interfere."

"Fuck you." I growled, giving him a sharp shove. "Screw your stupid orders, get in there and do the right thing!"

"This is you fault," Sam added next. "This wouldn't have happened if you could manage a damn devils trap!"

"I don't understand how it happened. I built that trap myself, it shouldn't have broken... I don't know what went wrong." Cas, for once since I zapped back to the past, looked shaken. "This doesn't make sense."

"This was all for nothing, Cas." Sam continued. "The demons aren't killing the angels, so Dean is laying in there in a frickin coma for nothing."

"Maybe Alastair was lying..."

"No," Sam got in his face. "He wasn't lying, and you know it."

Sam turned and stomped back into Deans room while Cas let out a deep sigh and looked at me.

"I'm beginning to think I was right." He said.

"What are you talking about?"

"The note I wrote in the future, when I stated that I needed to break ranks and join sides with your brothers. I believe I was right about that. Something isn't adding up. I'm starting to think that my orders aren't coming from God, but... Someone else."

"That's because they are!" I jerked him by the arm. "Are you forgetting that I know every fucking thing that happens during this time? I know what's happening, I know who's fucking everyone over. But since I can't exactly tell you that you need to hurry it up and come to that conclusion yourself." He squinted his eyes at me. "Go figure shit out if that's what you gotta do, and once you're done get your ass back here and help my Dad."

Now I was the one to stomp back into Dads room, while Cas disappeared.

Sam was sitting next to the bed, with his elbows resting on his knees, tapping his feet anxiously. I sat down opposite of him and the only thing we could do was sit there and hope that Dad woke up soon.

Thankfully a few hours later they took him off the ventilator, and another hour after that he woke up. He was groggy as fuck, not to mention he felt like he got hit by a bus, but he was well enough to start complaining about me. I actually didn't mind it so much this time, because it meant that he was gonna be ok. So I offered to go get Sam some coffee from the vending machine so Dad could relax without having me to deal with. I took my time, taking a seat in the lounge area staring at all the different variety of snacks in the machines. I waited a good thirty minutes before awkwardly slithering back into the room and taking a seat.

They had obviously been talking beforehand, because Dad was wide awake now and partially propped up on pillows. Sam fidgeted slightly before standing.

"I, uh... Gotta go get something from the car." He said, before quickly leaving the room.

After he was gone the silence in the room was deafening, until Dad cleared his throat.

"Hey," He garbled weakly, and I peeled my eyes from the floor. "Look, uh... Sam told me that you... Well you kinda saved my ass."

"What?" Already I was confused, Dad was talking to me without it being full of insults.

"The blood thing. You were the only match, so... I guess I kinda owe you one now, right?"

I shrugged. "Nah, that's what family's for, ain't it?"

"Maybe, but..." He cringed as he tried to sit up. "I've been kind of a dick lately. And, well- I'm not much for apologizing, but... Yeah... You know."

Yep, same old Dad, that sounded exactly like the so called "apologizes" he had given in the past. For some odd reason he just couldn't utter the dreaded words "I'm sorry". But at least I knew that's what he meant, which was enough for me.

"Well, don't worry about it." I replied. "I can't blame you I guess. I probably woulda been the same way if I had some crazy chick popping up out of no where and saying she was my sister."

I was contemplating telling him now about what Sam had been up to, yeah I knew it was a bad time since he was laying in a hospital bed but it might have been one of the only chances we would be alone to do it. Just as I was opening my mouth to blurt it out though Cas suddenly appeared in the room, sitting on the recliner beside the bed.

He passed me a quick glance before moving his eyes to Dad.

"You need to be more careful." He said. "Things are afoot, big things."

"Yeah, well," Dad sighed, leaning against the pillows. "I wouldn't be laid up here like this if you coulda kept Alastair in the devils trap." He blinked up at the ceiling a few times over before saying. "Is it true what he said? Did I really start all this? Did I break the first seal?"

I halfway wondered if I should be present for this conversation. Yeah, I already knew the story of what happened. Dad sold his soul for Sammy, went to hell and broke the first seal, but... Being there in the actual moment when he would find out the truth wasn't going to be a walk in the park. Dad liked to beat himself up for things, even if they happened to be something small or not even his fault. But something to this extreme, it would take him decades to recover from it, to get over the guilt.

"Yes," Cas answered, not even bothering to soften the blow. "It's true."

In a way I wished that future Cas had sent me back farther, back before Dad had actually sold his soul, back before Sam had died... If I could have went back even farther then I could have stopped all of this from happening in the first place.

"Then why did you bring me back? You shoulda just left me to rot in hell."

"We aren't blaming you for what happened, Dean-" Cas went on. "Once we heard of the plans they had for you we tried our best to get to you in time. But, we were too late. The seal was broken anyhow, but- We didn't bring you back for no reason at all, as I said before we do have work for you."

Dad barely looked at me as he bit back tears. "Are you gonna tell me what that work is now?"

"I told you, you have to stop it. But to be more specific, it's not what you might think. Your job requires you to stop _him_. The righteous man who begins it, is the only one who can finish it."

"Him?" Dad forced his head up. "You mean Lucifer, the apocalypse?" Cas only nodded slightly in return. "How the hell am I supposed to do that? I can't, Cas... It's too big. You got the wrong guy... I can't do it."

The room fell silent and I tried my best to hold back tears.

"Bet you never woulda counted on this huh, Mary?" Dad said. "That your big brother woulda been the one to fuck up the world?" He swallowed hard. "You picked a bad time to look us up, kid."

There wasn't a way I could respond to that, so all I could do was quickly wipe away tears and ignore the glares that Cas was giving me.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Just want to say Thanks for the comments and favs/followers :D**_

* * *

So Dad had always told me stories about this point in time- About all the crap they went through trying to save seals, and trying to avoid dick angels. He always talked about how the angels pretty much strung them around like puppets, forcing them to believe they were meant to _stop _the apocalypse from happening, when in all actuality it was the complete opposite. The angels wanted the apocalypse to happen. Dad and Sam didn't know any of that right now, obviously, which is why I was gonna spill it to Dad.

We had just finished with a random salt and burn, that ended with Sam getting tossed across the cemetery, and Dad and me frantically digging up the grave. Yeah, he actually let me in on this job, instead of making me sit in the car. So, I'd like to think that I helped out a little bit and stopped them from getting their asses kicked.

It had been a few weeks since Dad got the shit beat out of him by Alastair, so he was pretty much back to normal. And after we packed up the trunk and started back for the motel, I felt myself getting nervous. Dad had offered to drop Sam and I off at the motel while he went to grab some dinner. Sam wasn't really hurt from being bitch smacked by the ghost, but he was achy and wanted to lay down. But, after we pulled into the motel parking lot Sam climbed out and I cleared my throat.

"I'll just go with you." I said. "I'm kinda picky about my pie."

Dad shrugged. "Ok, whatever. Climb in the front seat."

My eyes went wide. I never, _ever _got to ride shot gun. Sammy always took that spot, even in the future. Sure, maybe once or twice I'd get lucky and get to sit in the front, like for instance if Sam was passed out in the backseat, but yeah... Obviously I was a little too excited by that one thing, which of course caused Dad to look at me like I was a freak. He only rolled his eyes as he backed out of the drive and sped off towards the closest diner.

"So," He said, not taking his eyes off the road. "You did good back there."

"What?" I snapped my head to him quickly.

"With the job. You handled yourself pretty good."

"Oh..." Ok now I was blushing. "Well, thanks."

"Apparently you're hip to all the hunting crap, what with living with Pastor Jim, but... Did Dad ever teach you anything?"

Great, more awkward questions. "Yeah... Let's just say Dad taught me what I needed to know."

"Did he ever take you on any jobs?"

"Yeah, once I got old enough." I stared at him intently. "But, the thing is... Is that he was kinda over protective, so he didn't really let me do anything that could get me killed. I was mainly in charge of the little things. Like I'd hang back while he got his hands dirty, and I'd help clean up."

"What's that mean?"

"Like if it was a demon thing, after it was stuck in a devils trap, that's when he'd let me come in and give a hand. He'd never really let me get too close though. He'd let me preform the exorcisms, but that's about it."

"So over all you'd say," He shrugged. "He was an ok Dad?"

I smiled faintly. "He was more than an ok Dad. He was the best."

I tried to ignore the glare on his face after that. "Well... Lucky you."

Ok maybe that wasn't the best thing to say. It was no big secret that his Dad wasn't exactly the greatest one in the world. He definitely wouldn't have won Daddy of the year award. I'd heard so many stories about my Grandpa and none of them were good. He was hard on his boys, _too _hard, forcing them to grow up as hunters and pretty much disowning Sammy after he decided he wanted to go to college. He was obsessed with getting revenge on the demon that killed his wife, and even though that meant neglecting his sons, he didn't care.

Here I was just trying to send some kind of hidden message to my own Dad, and in turn had gone and upset him making him believe that John Winchester had been some awesome Father.

I was a dick.

Well, since he was already mad at me, I guess it wouldn't matter if I pissed him off more, so... I brought up the subject that had my stomach twisted into knots.

"Hey, Dean." I murmured quietly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot." He replied.

"Well, it's kind of a weird question, but... What do you think of people that can... See the future?"

"Uh, what?" He glared at me. "What the hell kinda question is that?"

"A hypothetical one I guess. Like, what if you knew someone that could tell you with a certainty that something really really bad is gonna happen? Would you listen to em?"

He pulled into a parking spot at the diner, immediately turning to me with that harsh Dad face.

"What are you gettin at, Mary?"

"Uh... Well, just answer the question maybe?"

He sighed, shaking his head. "Ok. Depends on the situation I guess. Like, if I could trust this person and didn't think it was a monster I needed to gank. Cause usually when it's somethin like that it always ends up being something bad."

"Ok, so if it _was _a person you could trust, what then?"

"Then I'd wanna know how the hell they could see the future." He smirked.

I grumbled. "That's not the answer I was lookin for."

"It's a stupid question. Yeah, ok- Maybe I've had to deal with crap like that before. Sammy used to get premonitions, but as it turns out- It _was _caused from somethin bad." He let the sarcastic expression fade. "Why are you askin me this? Please don't tell me that you're having weirdo visions too?"

"N-No, definitely not having visions, dude."

"Then why'd you bring this up? What's goin on?"

Ok, I was gonna have to change my strategy up some. "Well, that really was just a hypothetical question, but... What if I knew somethin, and that somethin could be bad?"

"Just spit it out." He was getting annoyed clearly. "If you know something, then start talkin."

"It might just be nothing, but..." I sighed. "Please don't tell him I told you, ok?" He arched a brow at that, prodding me to go on with dagger eyes. "I've been waking up in the middle of the night and Sammy's gone. I caught him sneakin out while we're both supposed to be sleeping. I don't know where he's going," Ok that was a lie, duh. "But he's gone for hours, and always comes back before you wake up."

His face went blank. "Uh, what? How long's this been happening?"

"Since I got here. Really, at first I thought maybe you knew about it. Until I noticed how sneaky he was being."

"How often does it happen?"

"I dunno. Maybe once a week? Sometimes more." I blinked a few times over. "And, uh... Well there's somethin else." By now I had averted my eyes to the floor of the car. "When you were all beat up from Alastair, me and Sammy needed to find you, so he called some chick named Ruby," As soon as I spat that bitches name his eyes went wide. "She came and did some kind of witchy crap that found your location and when we got there you were already knocked out. Sam, he... He did somethin. He killed Alastair... With his mind."

He sat back in his seat, waited a good five seconds before he started slamming his palms down on the steering wheel.

"Why didn't you tell me this before?!" He snapped back.

"I-I thought you might have known. How the fuck was I supposed to know that he was keepin this shit from you? Really, I thought Cas woulda told you by now."

"Cas? Cas knew about it too?"

I fumbled. "Uh, well... He was there when Sam killed Alastair. Really, this is all new to me, dude- I didn't know about any of this crap." I tried to give off the illusion of being completely clueless. "How did Sam do that, Dean?"

"Good question." He ran his hand down his face. "I still haven't figured that out yet. But I sure as hell know one thing... He ain't running off in the middle of the night anymore. I'm gonna stop him."

"How?"

"I dunno. But even if I have to tie him to a frickin chair, I'll do it." He pushed the car door open. "Is there anything else I should know?"

Uh, yeah there was a shit ton of things that he needed to know. Most importantly, he wasn't my damn brother, he was my Dad. Not to mention that there was the little fact like comin back in time to stop all of the wrongs that go down.

"No," I shook my head sadly. "There's nothin else."

I knew he didn't believe me, but he for some reason didn't question it as we entered the diner and ordered our to-go food. It was gonna take a while to finish, so we took a seat at a booth and I found myself gawking at him. Even though it had been a few weeks that I'd been with them, it still hadn't seem to sink in that this young guy was actually my Dad.

Once Dad had hit fifty 55 or 56, the gray really started to come in, to the point that within a couple months he had a full head of it. The wrinkles started popping in more and more after that. Honestly, he needed glasses desperately, but he was such a stubborn guy he refused to go and do it. Once he hit 60 he had the onset of Parkinson's, and the Doctor claimed it was from one too many head injuries when he was younger. Cas did what he could, actually- He healed him all the damn time, but these little issues just kept popping back up. Yeah, I know that that kinda thing happens when you get older, but this was somethin different. It seemed Dad and Sam had been jinxed somehow, and as time progressed and more weird things kept happening, Cas had come to the conclusion that it had something to do with a certain event in the past. And then... _It _happened. Dad getting killed. It wasn't just some little accident, and really I didn't know what the fuck to think after it happened. Most people might think that someone that was nearly 70 had lived their life and to not throw a fit over their old man dying, but... This was so much different.

"Uh," Dad cleared his throat awkwardly. "What the hell are you starin at?"

I snapped out of my thoughts long enough to realize that for ten minutes straight I had my eyes locked onto him.

"Oh, uh..." I shrugged, playing it off. "I was just thinkin how weird it was that you and me look so much alike."

"Not _that _weird." He grumbled. "Considering you're my sister and all."

"Yeah, right..." I shifted in my seat. "Well, ya know... It's just that we're so similar and all."

"Freak." He rolled his eyes. "Stop lookin at me like that. You're weirdin me out."

I snickered. "Sorry."

"What's with the hair anyways?" He said, pointing at my head. "You always keep it like that?"

"Like what? Short?"

"Yeah, not sayin it looks bad or nothing, but... Kinda makes you look like a fourteen year old boy."

Now I scowled. "Dad always kept my hair short, even when I was little. He said that having long hair was too dangerous, that when you're tryin to run away from somethin it just gives em something to grab."

He snorted out a laugh. "Someone shoulda told that to Sammy, right? He looks like a frickin amazon woman."

I held back my own snort after that comment. The Sam I knew actually had short hair, mainly because he didn't have much of it anymore, which of course was something Dad always made fun of.

Even though I tried not to get my hopes up, I wondered if we were having some sort of bonding moment, as weird as that sounded. It was the first time since I came back in time that Dad and I had actually sat and talked about something other than a job, or his bitching at me. Ya know, even though Dad had been kind of a butt since I got there, in a way it actually seemed almost "Dad like" in a way. Yeah I knew it was just coincidence because he had no idea he was my Father, but yeah- I guess I just liked to think of it that way. That way I didn't have to believe he hated me.

"So what was your Mom's name?" He suddenly asked.

And I nearly swallowed my own tongue, because I didn't know how to answer that. Since Cas said it might be best to keep my real identity a secret, I didn't wanna fuck up anything and risk not being born.

"I don't know." I lied. "I never knew her. She died when I was only two months old. And Dad, well... He never really talked about her much."

Which of course, all of that wasn't true. I knew as much as I could about my Mom, but it wasn't that much because really- Dad didn't know that much about her either seeing is that she was a one night stand. But, I did know that her name was Brenda. Honestly, that's as much as I wanted to know about her, she wasn't a Mom to me- She was just the woman that birthed me and then completely deserted me two months after I was born.

"Yeah and Dad never wrote about anything in his journal either. So I guess there'd be no way of trackin her down."

"Um." I scratched my head uncomfortably. "Why would you wanna track her down? She's dead, remember?"

"Yeah," He pursed his lips at me... Again. "Course I know you're lyin about that. I know you're lyin about a lot of things actually." He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. Yeah that was his typical intimidation tactic. "So how bout you try being honest for once, huh? What are you hiding?"

"Why would you think I'm lyin, or hiding something?" I retorted defensively.

"You and me got the same tells, kid." He smirked. "Now I know that you gotta be related to me and Sammy. Whether I wanna admit it or not the resemblance is friggin uncanny. But that don't mean I buy your whole story."

"Seriously, this shit again." I sighed. "Hey, I've told you everything I know, dude. And Cas pretty much confirmed everything I said, right? So what the hell would I be hiding?"

"Don't get an attitude with me." He barked, and I was taken aback. "I call the shots here, and I ask the questions, and you're gonna answer them."

"Fine!" I spat, crossing my arms. "Ok, my Mom's not dead. She ditched me with Dad when I was two months old and took off. I have no idea where she is, or even what her name is." Now I leaned forward, giving him the same snarky glare. "And that's the truth, that's all of it. Now get off my damn back!"

His eyes narrowed and I knew he didn't believe me. I could never lie to Dad, ever... He always knew just by looking at my face. Apparently past Dad had the same skills as future Dad- Ugh, which didn't bode well for me naturally.

"Why'd you lie about your Mom bein dead?" He replied.

"If you got abandoned as a baby wouldn't it bother you talkin about it? Honestly, that's what I consider her. She's dead to me. I don't have a Mom."

"You shouldn't talk about your Mom that way."

My lips flattened into a thin line. "Funny, my _Dad _taught me that."

"Did he now?"

"Yeah, he always told me that I didn't need her. That he was enough. That it didn't matter if I never grew up with a Mom because he..." I paused and bit my tongue.

"He... What?" Out came another cocky smirk.

God dammit he was good! If I didn't end this conversation now then there was no telling what I might blurt out in the heat of the moment. So, to avoid answering that question I slid out of the booth.

"Where the hell are you going? I'm not through talkin to you yet. You sit back down!" He snapped.

I stopped in mid step and closed my eyes. For someone who thought he was my brother, he sure as hell was talking like a Father.

"I'm walking back to the motel. I'm through explaining shit to you." I replied, then pushed my way out the diner door.

* * *

I didn't make it halfway back to the motel before I heard the rumble of the Impalas engine creeping up behind me. And try as I might to ignore him, he inched his way closer and closer until he was practically running me over. Seeing is that I was ignoring him, he'd slow down then rev the engine, then creep up on me a second time. My response to that was throwing my middle finger above my head. Yeah, had he been future Dad he woulda cussed me out for that.

He continued doing that for a good few minutes before honking little honks at me and then pulling up beside me.

"Mary! Get in the damn car!" He shouted.

"No!" I shouted back.

"Stop being a baby, get in the fucking car or I'll leave you here." I said nothing in return and he cursed under his breath. "I'll do it, I'll leave you on the side of the road!"

"Good, go ahead!"

"Fine!" He then zoomed off down the road and disappeared around a sharp turn.

My thoughts right about then were "sflkjsdfkdf" which of course didn't make a whole heck of a lot of sense, but I was pissed. And my thoughts never really did make much sense when I was this ticked off.

In what world did I ever think this was gonna work out? Was I really that stupid? Did I really think that I'd come back in frickin time and be reunited with my Dad and magically things would be all unicorns and fluffy kittens? How in the hell had I not predicted this very thing happening? Dad was never gonna warm up to me, he was always gonna hate me. He was always gonna think I was some deceiving shrew monster that had ulterior motives to being here. He was never gonna trust me.

But I couldn't go back, I didn't want to. Even if he hated me it didn't matter. I was here for a reason. Because I loved my Dad and uncle and I wanted to save them.

I kicked at the gravel as I walked, rounding the sharp turn and stopping once I saw the Impala was parked on the side, and Dad was leaning against the trunk with his arms crossed.

"You done pouting yet?" He asked. "Cause if you are, then get in the damn car. I ain't leaving you to walk alone out here. It's not safe."

"Since when do you give a crap about me?" I snapped back. Yeah I know, it sounded childish, but what can I say, I _was _pouting.

He shook his head and grumbled some more. "Don't make me stuff you in the trunk. Just get in the car, the food's gettin cold." He finished with. "If you make my damn pie spoil there'll be hell to pay."

So I stomped past him and jumped back in the passenger seat, slamming the door behind me. I could hear him cursing his way around the car as he got back behind the wheel and took off again. We didn't speak for several long minutes, as I continued to pout and stare out the window, refusing to look at him. Finally to break the tension he flicked on the radio as Led Zeppelins Traveling Riverside Blues started blaring.

"Dude, I love this song." I said, momentarily forgetting my mope session. "Turn that shit up."

"Seriously?" He smirked. "You like this song?"

"Hell yeah I love this song. It's one of my favorites."

He cranked up the volume and for a few fleeting minutes we were both singing obnoxiously like idiots, just like we always used to do. Once the song was over I sat back with a crooked smile, my mood suddenly lifted.

"Sammy hates my music." Dad said. "Bitches about it all the time."

"It's what I grew up with," I replied. "It brings back a lot of good memories."

He nodded, giving a crooked smile of his own as we pulled into the parking lot of the motel. He seemed to be in a decent mood now as well, that is until we stepped back into the room and he remembered what I'd told him about Sam. He did a complete 180 after that, and sat stiffly at the table eating his food, refusing to even acknowledge Sam if he'd ask a question. In a way I felt guilty for it, but then I would remember what Sammy was doing behind Dads back and I'd get over it. If he only knew just how bad things ended up in the future because of the crap he did back then, I'm sure he would have rather put a bullet in his own head then keep on going.

I could tell Dad was trying to figure out a way to catch Sam in the act, to somehow find a way of stopping him from doing whatever the hell he was doing when he took off at night. If I had to guess, I would say that Dad wanted to wait until after dark, he'd pretend to sleep and wait until Sammy sneaked out again- Then he'd follow. That seemed like a decent enough plan. That way Dad could see for himself what Sam was doing, and I wouldn't have had to actually say it flat out. I wouldn't be screwing with the timeline too much, and hopefully things would end up working out without me really having to be involved.

It was a nice thought at least, which didn't end up happening since a ton of crap pretty much blew up in my face.

Dad had stumbled across something that smelled like a case in the next state over, so me and Sam started packing up the car. I wasn't even outside five minutes... Not _five_ minutes, and when I stepped back into the room to grab my duffel I saw Dad standing in front of it, holding the photos I had hidden there. He was staring at them with his eyes wide, and the blood had all but drained from his face. Once he spotted me he quickly pulled his gun from his jacket and pointed it straight at my head.

"Who the hell are you?!" He shouted.

I couldn't move, speak or breathe- The only thing I could do was stand there and stare at those pictures with my heart in my throat.

"Answer me!" He went on. "Who the hell are you?!"

Sam heard the shouts from outside and came rushing back in, skidding to a stop once he saw Dad with the gun.

"Hey, whoa whoa. Dean, what the hell are you doing?!"

He didn't answer that with words and instead shoved the pictures into Sam's hands. He flicked through them a few times over, and it didn't take long for his face to look the same as Dads.

"What the hell..."

"My thoughts exactly!" Dad cocked his gun. "You better start talkin. Who the hell are you?! Why do you have pictures of me and Sam? Oh, and better yet, why are they friggin pictures of us when we're old?!"

"Dean..." Sam was much calmer, considering. "Put the gun down."

"Not until I know what the hell is going on!"

My eyes filled with tears so I quickly lowered them to the floor. "I think a part of you already knows."

"No, you see, I thought I knew what mighta been going on. But here I am, minding my own damn business when I trip over your fucking duffel. And out pours these pictures of me and Sam, but not normal pictures. The date on the back says 20 friggin 28, 34, and fucking 37." He moved closer. "So I repeat, who the hell are you?!"

I looked to Sam, and I knew he already knew who I was... Dad did too, but... He was too freaked to say it out loud. It woulda been obvious from the pictures of he and I together that I was his kid.

I didn't want it to come down to this, especially not so god damned angrily. But I knew that I couldn't keep it a secret anymore, so I looked up at him and brushed the tears away.

"I'm your daughter." I said, my voice shaking.

His jaw clenched tightly and that didn't seem to motivate him into lowering the gun. "That's a god damned lie!"

"No it's not." I sniffed. "I'm your daughter. My name's Mary Winchester, you named me after your Mother. Cas sent me back here to help you, because some really horrible things happen in the future and we wanted to try and stop it." I blew out a deep breath of air and knew what needed to be said. "You told me that this happened to you, ya know? Cas sent you back to 1977, you pretty much had the same conversation with your Mom. You told her about how she used to make you tomato rice soup when you were sick. You actually did that for me... Well," I snickered through the tears. "You tried, anyways. You were never any good at cooking unless it was burgers. You used to tell me stories about how when you were a kid, and you and Sammy were stuck in motel rooms how you took care of him. You even stole a Christmas tree and presents just to give your little brother a Christmas." Dad had gone stiff by this point. "And, for my sixteenth birthday you gave me this."

I reached into my pocket and pulled out a lighter that had his initials crudely engraved into it. I held it in the air and his face went blank.

"You told me you tried to carve your initials into that after your Dad had given it to you on _your _sixteenth birthday. And that for a long time you thought you lost the thing until you found it buried in the trunk of the impala when I was a kid. If you go out there and dig around, hell... It'll be there." I held it out and he took it from me, staring at it in complete shock. "I know that this is hard to believe, but it's true... I'm your daughter."

He lowered the gun to his side. "No, no way. This don't make sense... How... How can I have a kid?"

Sam had remained silent throughout, only gazing at me with a stunned face, although his puppy eyes were sympathetic.

"It's a long story," I answered, trying to calm down. "I can tell you everything if you want... If not, if you don't want me here... I can take off."

He cleared his throat and finally tossed the gun onto the bed. "Sammy... Give us a minute would ya?" Sam nodded, still saying nothing as he stepped outside and closed the door behind him. "Ok, so... Talk... When did I..." He ran his hand down his face. "When were you born?"

"2026."

His brows rose. "Damn... I was old."

Yeah he was making jokes to calm himself down. "I was kind of an accident, I guess. A one night stand with some bartender half your age. I was two months old when she tracked you down and dumped me off on you."

He nodded. "And, I uh... Well, I took you in... Obviously."

"Yeah," I tried to force off a smile. "My name was actually Shelby, but you hated it, and changed it to Mary."

He started to thumb through the pictures again, startled to the point I was convinced a slight breeze would blow him over.

"Stupid question," He said, keeping his eyes on the pictures. "But I raised you to be a hunter?"

"Sorta, I mean. Depends on how you look at it. You taught me everything I'd need to know to protect myself."

He sat on the edge of the bed and I stood stiffly to the side, unable to move.

"Son of a bitch..." He breathed out. "But, you're a hunter now, so... That means I dragged you into this anyways?"

"Actually no." I awkwardly moved forward and sat beside him. "Believe it or not, my childhood was pretty damn good. Once I was old enough, I went to the same school, had friends. You always gave me the choice on whether or not I wanted to have anything to do with being a hunter. Yeah you taught me what I needed to know, taught me how to shoot, how to fight. But you always told me that I didn't have to use any of that if I didn't want. You said that your Dad didn't give you that choice, so..."

His attention froze on the picture of us during Christmas time, and Cas dressed up in tinsel.

"So you chose to do this?" He asked.

"Yeah. Once I was old enough to make up my own mind I told you what I wanted. I think there was a part of you that wasn't happy about it. I think you wanted me to go off to college or something, but you didn't argue." I shrugged. "I guess the other part of you was proud that I wanted to follow in your footsteps."

He flicked through to the next picture, which was he and I sitting on the hood of the impala.

"So, would you say I was a... Well, an ok Dad?"

I sighed. "Well don't you remember what I said in the car? You were a really good Dad. You also said that you didn't wanna be the kind of Father like the one you had. And, from what Sammy always said... You weren't anything like him."

He nodded. "Good, yeah.. That's, uh... That's good. So..." He sniffled a couple times, or at least I thought he did. "You said somethin bad happened, which is why Cas zapped you back here... What happened?"

"I'm... Not supposed to say. He sent me back but only under the conditions that I don't share too much. It can mess up the timeline or some crap like that. I don't know, angels... They're confusing with all their crazy "time is fluent" babble."

He snickered. "Yeah, hell... I know how that is. So this Cas here, he's up to speed on everything?"

"Yeah... When I first got here I prayed to him and gave him a note that his future self wrote, overall it didn't take much for him to be convinced."

"If you can't tell us what the hell happens in the future, then how're we supposed to make sure it don't go down like that?"

Psh, good question. "Cas said something about my presence being here might be enough to alter certain things, at least enough that I might be able to... Well... Save you."

"Save me?" He finally looked at me. "So I die?"

"You both do. You and Sammy both."

His brows pulled together. "How?"

"I can't say. That's one of the things I can't talk about." I sat up straight. "All I can say is that you gotta trust your instincts, and listen to what they might be tellin you later on."

Well, at least he was calming down and not holding a gun to my head any longer.

"One of the millions of things that confuses me," He said. "Is why is Cas in this picture? Why was he still around, huh? I figured he woulda taken off after this whole apocalypse crap was over?"

I smiled slightly. "Cas is... He pretty much becomes your best friend, like a second brother to you."

I think he found that harder to believe than me being his daughter. "What? How the hell does that happen?"

"Just gonna have to wait and see. Keep an open mind." I sighed when he went silent, staring off at the wall with his eyes wide. "I know it's a long shot, but... Do you believe me?"

He ran his hand back and forth through his hair before snickering. "I honestly don't know what the fuck to think right now. It ain't that I know this time traveling crap's not possible, cause Cas has sent me back a couple decades... I just... I dunno, man... This is trippy." He stood. "One second you're supposedly my sister, the next you're sayin you're my kid? Call me crazy but I think any dude out there would be freakin out by this point, especially since I'm fucking twenty nine, and you're twenty two. What the hell?" He snickered and I could see the freakout returning. "I mean, what the fuck are you supposed to call me? Dad? How would that work?"

"I know it's gonna be weird."

"Weird?!" He shook his head and started pacing. "No, not weird. This is... This is... I don't even know! How the hell am I supposed to react to this?" He started for the door. "I need to get outa here."

I jumped up just as he pulled the door open. "Dad, wait..."

He skidded to a stop, going stiff after he heard that, then shook his head mumbling. "Nope, nope nope." under his breath before rushing to the impala and peeling out of the drive.

Sam had been lingering outside for the last few minutes, and once Dad disappeared down the road he finally found me standing in the doorway with my head lowered.

He didn't know what to say. Seriously, how could he? I guess I had just gone and fucked everything up even more than it already was. They knew the truth now, and it sure as hell wasn't a good thing.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Occasionally there's gonna be a third person view. Just wanted to say so there wouldn't be any confusion. **_

* * *

He was gone for hours, until pretty much the middle of the night and still hadn't come back. Sam had tried calling him a million times over, and he wouldn't answer. I guess it was safe to say that I had pretty much scarred him for life, and he wasn't ever gonna be the same after this.

So I started thinking, about everything... About how future Cas had told me that my presence in this time line might have been enough to alter what happened in the future. That didn't necessarily mean I had to be with Dad and Sam. Just having me here, having him know the truth, could have been enough. So really what was the point in me sticking around? Especially since I knew that Dad would never be able to adjust to this. I would be a distraction and not a good one. I could fuck with his head so much that he might not be able to focus on the job. I could end up getting him killed long before the shit went down in the future. That was a risk I wasn't willing to take. And yeah, maybe it seemed like some dramatic scene from a movie- A rejected daughter packing her shit in the middle of the night and taking off, but I didn't care. The only thing I wanted was to save my Dad and uncle, I could give a rats ass about myself. Besides, it's not like I wouldn't just be born again later if something happened to me, right? As crazy as that thought was.

I waited until Sammy was asleep, packing up my things and stared at the rainstorm going on outside. Ugh, perfect. I swear it was like a scene out of some lame ass movie. Before I walked out the door I took out my cell phone and laid it on the table, halting for a moment before reaching into my duffel and pulling out the picture of Dad and me on the hood of the impala. I was just a toddler in that picture, and he had me wrapped up in his leather jacket since it was the middle of winter- Which left him with only his typical button down shirt and t-shirt underneath. I didn't remember that day, since I was too little, but Sam had told me that he was surprised Dad actually wanted to take that picture. It wasn't exactly Dads personality to do crap like that, so when Sam snapped the picture he said he was trying not laugh at him. Dad tried his best to give a smile that didn't seem forced while I was chewing on my own fist.

Yeah... He looked happy in that picture, so I sat it down on the table beside my phone. He could hate me all he wanted in this time, I guess it didn't matter. But I wanted to leave him with something that proved that in the future, he actually cared about me.

I left shortly after that, carefully sneaking my way out of the motel room without waking Sam, but not before grabbing something from his duffel. A hex bag, one that I knew for certain warded me against not only demons... But angels. I didn't want to be found, and just in case Dad actually gave a crap that I took off, I wouldn't want him sticking Cas on my trail.

* * *

He stared down at the shot in his hand, having no interest in actually drinking it. Honestly getting drunk sounded good right about now, but Dean couldn't bring himself to actually accomplish that. After all, he was driving back to the motel, and he didn't feel much like grabbing a cab and leaving his baby behind at the bar. So not only did he have no interest in his shot of Jack, but he had actually been ignoring the bartender that had been flirting with him for the last two hours.

That proved that he was freaked out, and he knew that it was true. He could tell just by looking in the kids face that it was true. And really, it shouldn't have been all that surprising. Their lives weren't what you would say was normal. Crazy shit like this happened almost everyday. Well... Not daughters coming back in time, but with angels, demons, hunting- The apocalypse practically dancing right in front of them, freaky crap like this shouldn't have fazed him.

But he couldn't keep his hands from nervously twitching, and his mind to stop racing. Maybe he could just have Cas ship her back to her own time? That would have been a hell of a lot easier than actually having to come to terms that he wasn't even friggin thirty years old and he already had a twenty two year old daughter. Oh, that and, he didn't want a kid.

With that thought he downed the shot in one gulp, cringing as it burnt all the way down. When his phone started ringing for the millionth time, he finally pulled it from his jacket and answered.

"Sammy, seriously- Just leave me the hell alone, ok?" He snapped.

"Dean, get back to the motel, now." Sam replied. "Mary's gone."

He let out a sigh. "She probably just went for a walk, calm down."

"A walk? At 3 in the fucking morning, Dean? No, she's _gone _gone. As in packed her bags, left her phone, _gone_!" Dean went silent for a good thirty seconds. "Dean! Did you hear me?"

"Yeah, yeah I hear you. I'm coming back."

He then hung up and threw a wad of cash on the bar, grabbed his jacket and left the building. It surprised him actually that he floored it back to the motel, it surprised him when he practically kicked the door down and started searching the room for some trace of evidence she might have left behind, it surprised him when his stomach started twisting into knots. Why? Why would be be reacting that way?

"I told you there's nothing here, Dean." Sam snapped. "She took everything but her phone. Obviously because she knew we could trace the GPS on it." Dean stopped taring apart the room when Sam held something out. "She left this though."

Dean snatched the picture out of his hand and gave it a long hard glance. She obviously left that there for a reason, maybe to strike a nerve or something, he wasn't sure. Of course she'd pick the one picture where he was holding her on his knee, smiling awkwardly at the camera.

"We need to figure out where the hell she woulda gone." He said, refusing to take his eyes off the picture. "Maybe this was a message or something?"

"Maybe," Sam sighed. "I don't recognize anything in that picture though except for the Impala. See that door in the background," He pointed to a door that held no numbers, no signs of an address at all. "Kinda strange isn't it? What do you think that is?"

"Who knows," He lowered the picture and smacked it against his palm. "Ya know, in a couple of the other pictures we were in some room, it looked like a library or somethin."

"Yeah, I remember. Bookshelves, tables, old fashioned decor, like from the forties and fifties maybe."

"I'm gonna resist askin how you know about the decor, Sammy." Dean arched his brows. "Maybe we lived in whatever that place was? We looked kinda at home. And in the Christmas picture Mary was in her pajamas."

Sam snorted out a laugh. "Really examined those pictures huh, Dean?"

"Shut up." He stuffed the picture in his pocket. "We should call Cas. Maybe he'd be able to find her."

After a few attempts at praying they finally heard the flapping of wings as Cas stood awkwardly before them.

"Hello, Dean." Cas said, then turned a small circle. "Where's Mary?"

"Wow, observant, that took you what, five seconds?" Dean cracked open a beer. "She's gone. Took off."

"Gone? Gone where?" Cas squinted his eyes.

"Don't know. We had a uh... Well, a disagreement."

"Meaning Mary told us who she _really _was," Sam said, crossing his arms. "And Dean handled it really well."

Cas sighed, lowering his eyes to the floor. "I see. So she told you she was your daughter?"

"Oh yeah," Dean started pacing again. "And for the record- You're a dick for not tellin me about that sooner."

"It wasn't my responsibility to tell you, Dean." Cas barked back. "It was hers. And she obviously felt it wouldn't have been a good idea in the beginning. Seeing is that she's run away I'm inclined to believe she was right."

"Whatever," Sam leaned against the dresser. "Can you just go find her, please?"

Cas nodded. "Give me a moment."

He then vanished from the room, was gone for less than ten seconds before poofing back. "I can't locate her. She's warded from me."

"What?" Dean snapped. "How's that possible, she wasn't warded before?"

Sam then arched a brow and stomped over to his duffel, sifting through the plaid shirts and jeans. "I know how," He sighed. "She stole my hex bag."

"Dammit," Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. "Friggin kid, she's smarter than I thought." He threw his arms up in the air. "Ok so now what? How the hell are we supposed to find her?"

"Did she ever say anything to you? Like maybe talked about some place that might have meant something to her?" Sam asked.

"No, Sam. She didn't. We didn't exactly spend quality time together or whatever. I don't know anything about the kid." Dean then grabbed his keys. "Comon. The least we can do at the moment is start driving. Try the bus stations first."

Sam followed after him but before they left the motel room Cas suddenly said.

"I might have an idea. Although, it's highly unlikely it would work."

Dean slammed the door. "Do it, just do whatever it is..." He then shrugged. "But, uh... What is it?"

Cas moved to the table after poofing away, retuning with a bowl and a variety of herbs and other items for a spell.

"Mary said that I was the one to send her back here, which means... I might be able to come into contact with myself."

"Wait a second." Sam snorted. "You're gonna make a call to your future self?"

Cas stopped with drawing sigils on the table top. "Yes, it's risky and the chances of myself actually receiving the call aren't high. But at the moment I'm guessing that I would be the best one to know where Mary might have gone."

"Why's that?" Dean asked. "Why would the _you_ in the future be anymore able to find her over the _you_ now." He shook his head. "I'm giving myself a headache."

"In the note I wrote myself it expressed a certain interest in her. And according to Mary we had been friends." Cas started mixing the ingredients in the bowl. "Personally I'm a little hesitant to communicate with myself. Even I can admit it's strange."

"Shyeah," Sam rolled his eyes. "But wouldn't you coming into contact with yourself in the future alter the timeline or something? Wouldn't there be like a, uh..." He shrugged. "An after affect or something?"

"No." Cas answered flatly.

Dean and Sam exchanged odd glances. "No? So you're sayin future you, talking to you from the past isn't gonna like make the world implode or nothin?" Dean asked.

"No." He answered flatly again.

"How's that possible?" Sam sat at the table. "According to Mary she couldn't tell us certain details because it could completely screw up the time line?"

"She was misinformed." Cas finished mixing the ingredients. "I need to finish this, give me a moment."

Both brothers fell silent as Cas started chanting something in Enochian before the contents in the bowl started to smoke. He leaned over the table with his eyes closed, muttering quiet words under his breath for nearly two minutes before he stumbled backwards and grabbed his head.

"Hey, whoa!" Dean said, steadying him. "What happened?"

"I received the message." Cas said, wobbly making himself to a chair and falling into it.

"And?" Sam prodded. "What did you say?"

"This isn't going according to plan," A fourth gruff voice said from the opposite side of the room. "I'm sure that's your fault, Dean."

Sam and Dean swung around quickly while Cas only stared from his chair wide eyed.

It was... Cas... Another Cas. One that wasn't dressed in a suit and trench coat, one whose expression wasn't as blank and cold as the man seated in the chair.

"Oh holy crap," Dean muttered quietly. "This goes well past my pay grade."

"Uh... Cas?" Sam questioned. "What the hell..."

"Let's just call me Castiel for the moment," He said moving forward. "Less confusion that way," He paused and looked at himself from the past, arching a brow. "Well, maybe."

"Why do I get the feeling that this is gonna completely fuck things up?" Dean asked. "I mean, you coming back from the future and interacting with past you, isn't that gonna like make a rip in time and space or somethin?"

"Not hardly, Dean." Castiel replied. "This isn't the first time something like this has happened. Although it's been centuries."

Cas pulled himself out of the chair. "I didn't think you would actually come here, I thought maybe..."

"That I would just speak through the rift? No, not when it comes to something like this." Castiel interrupted. "I don't have much time though, I can only remain here for a few hours or else I'm stuck, so... What happened, and make the story quick."

"Well, wait..." Sam rubbed his head. "Now I think _I'm _getting a headache... How is this possible?"

"I contacted him at the precise moment he sent Mary back to 2009," Cas answered. "It was the only way for the message to get through."

Everyone only gawked at the future version of Cas, at his plain button up shirt, his jeans and boots. It was a surprise to see him looking so normal.

"Remember, I have a time limit." Castiel interrupted their thoughts. "How long has she been gone?"

"I don't know." Sam answered. "Hours, maybe. But we can't track her because she stole my hex bag."

Castiel snickered. "Sounds like Mary. Ok, tell me exactly what happened, or should I guess?" He stood in front of Dean. "She told you who she was, you became angry and said hurtful things, went to go drink your troubles away and she ran? Am I right?"

Dean scowled. "It wasn't exactly like that."

"Did she leave anything behind?" Castiel ignored that statement.

"Her phone, and a picture." Sam answered.

"Show me the picture."

Dean pulled it from his pocket and handed it to him. He took one quick glance before sighing. "Alright. I know where she's going."

"Awesome, where?" Dean replied. "Tell us and we'll go get her, and you can get back to your own time."

"That might not be the best course of action." Cas added. "Since you were the one that drove her away."

"This is uncomfortable." Castiel sighed. "You," He pointed to himself. "Just... Stay silent. You're throwing me off."

Cas' eyes squinted again but he didn't speak.

"I can't tell you the exact location of where she's going," Castiel went on. "Because there are certain things that you have to discover on your own. But I'll say that she'll be at the nearest bus station to a town called Lebanon Kansas. I would advise driving fast, so you can beat her bus there."

"Can't you just zap your ass over there and get her?" Dean bellowed. "Might be quicker that way, we wouldn't have a chance of losin her."

"I can't," Castiel sighed. "There's details that I neglected to inform her, she wouldn't understand how I'm here without there being danger in the end."

"I don't get it?" Sam shook his head. "What are you talking about?"

"Mary..." Castiel moved across the room and sat in the chair his past self had previously been sitting in. "After the incident that killed both Dean and yourself, she was inconsolable. She was convinced that if I sent her back that she would be able to stop it from happening. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't as simple as that, but she wouldn't hear it. She loved her family, and wanted to help." He saw Deans beer and quickly took a nice long pull. "I agreed to send her back, but I didn't tell her that there was nothing she could do. I've explained it to you before, Dean- That no matter what you try to change in the past, all roads always lead to the same destination."

"Then..." Dean shifted on his feet. "What the hell is she doin here?"

"As I said she was inconsolable, she was completely miserable. I hadn't the heart to sit back and watch that, so... I sent her back here so she could be with her family. Where she could be happy again." He narrowed his eyes, clearly directing the heated glare to Dean. "I don't know why I expected you to handle the situation more maturely than you did. Apparently I was naive."

"So you're saying," Dean ignored the jab. "That Mary came back here thinkin she could change things, but it's not true? And you felt sorry for her and threw her back a few decades just so she wouldn't have to be alone anymore?"

"Basically." Castiel sat the beer aside.

"Why would you do that?"

Castiel's gaze hardened. "Dean, what are some of the things _you've _done for someone that you care about? I seem to recall the hasty decision of selling your soul to save your brother."

Both brothers went stiff and Sam cleared his throat before saying. "Uh... So... You and Mary?"

"Yes," Castiel flew to his feet when Dean's face went flat. "Which really isn't any of your concern, I think you should be leaving and making the drive to Kansas, don't you?"

Sam and Dean turned to _their _Cas who only stood there awkwardly with his eyes on the floor.

"Should I be trying to beat the crap outa him or somethin?" Dean asked. "Considering he's screwin my daughter?"

Cas' head shot up quickly and he fidgeted. "Dean I'm not..."

"You're getting side tracked." Castiel interrupted. "You have a decision to make now. Are you going to keep this information to yourself, or are you going to tell Mary what I've just told you? Because I don't think it would serve much of a purpose to tell her- I sent her here so she could be happy."

"Yeah, but... It was a lie," Sam said. "She believes she's gonna be able to change things when she can't."

"What harm would it do?" Castiel retorted. "She's where she wants to be, and besides... Whether she can really alter the time line or not, she has information that could be useful to you. It might be beneficial for you to keep this to yourself."

"And the fact that this so called incident that kills you doesn't happen until late in your lives. She would have decades here." Cas added.

Dean furrowed his brows. "Maybe so, but... Did you ever stop and think about how this might make me and Sammy feel?"

"She's family." Castiel said, crossing his arms. "Isn't that what matters to you? It always has?"

Dean couldn't argue with that because he was right. To him family meant everything, and here he was ready and willing to just toss a piece of that family away and send her back to her own time. Even he had to admit to himself that was a dick move. So he grabbed his car keys and nudged Sam.

"Let's go, we gotta beat that bus to Kansas." He said.

Sam grabbed his jacket and they both started for the door, when they glanced back over their shoulders Castiel was gone and Cas had already poofed himself to the backseat of the impala.

"Trippy," Dean said, stepping out into the rain. "Sometimes I wonder if our lives are actually real."

"Yeah," Sam snickered. "Me too."

They jumped in the impala and sped off from the parking lot. And for the first hour Dean kept shifting his gazes to the rear view mirror to Cas who sat silently in the backseat.

"So," He grumbled. "What the hell, huh? You and Mary?"

"It was just as big of a surprise to me." Cas replied.

"So you knew?" Sam asked, turning to stare at him.

"Something to that affect was written in the note."

"What else was written in it?"

Cas watched the scenery whiz past. "I knew that her presence here in this time wouldn't change anything in the future. But, in the note I said to keep that information to myself. There were a few more details that really hold no relevance."

"Such as?" Dean asked now.

"I would rather keep that to myself as well."

Dean rolled his eyes and returned his attention to the road. "Ok, so what the hell am I supposed to do, huh? I could kinda use some advice with this one."

"You know what to do, Dean." Sam answered. "Don't be a dick."

"Yeah cause that just solves everything. Seriously, what the hell am I supposed to do?"

Sam sighed, shaking his head. "Think about it this way- What would you do if you knew you could go back and live your life with Mom and Dad, and they treated _you _like crap? What if they had talked to you the way you've talked to Mary?"

Dean clenched his jaw. "I see your point."

"Good. Just... Don't be... _Dad_. Yeah this is gonna be weird, but it's not that bad, right?"

"I never said it was bad exactly. But, I don't know nothin about kids."

"Technically she's not a kid. She's an adult. It's not like she's a five year old."

Dean snickered. "Thank god. No diapers."

"Five year olds don't wear diapers, genius." Sam retorted.

Now Dean scowled as he fell silent and stepped on the gas.


	5. Chapter 5

When I stepped off the bus and was immediately smacked in the face with a damp gust of wind, I shuddered under my jacket. The bus ride was completely miserable for a number of reasons. Not only did I get stuck sitting by a drunk guy with grabby hands, but halfway to Kansas we got a flat tire, then of course there was the fact that I was already miserable anyway- So overall the trip sucked ass.

I lugged my duffel over my shoulder and could only stand there for a moment trying to gather my thoughts. It woulda been simple if I actually had some kind of idea on where the hell I was gonna go. I figured I could just haul up in the bunker, but... I didn't have the key- And there was no way I'd be getting in there without it. That place was impenetrable, and I couldn't just pick the lock like I would at any other joint. But, I needed somewhere familiar, a place that felt sorta like home. I figured maybe I could just get a job somewhere in Lebanon, maybe rent a little apartment or something and live my life... Somehow. Yeah it was gonna suck, but at least it was something.

So with a deep breath I stepped into the bus terminal, noticing it was pretty much deserted but for one or two people passed out on benches. First thing's first is I was gonna find a frickin bathroom cause I sure as hell wasn't gonna piss on the bus. Those toilets were disgusting, and my bladder was about to explode. So I started for the sign on the opposite side of the building that led to the restrooms. As I passed a bench I didn't even notice who was sitting there until I heard.

"How was the ride?"

My feet skidded to a stop so quickly I nearly tripped and fell on my face. It was Dad.

"What the..." I breathed out. "How'd you find me?"

"You really think you could dodge me?" He snickered. "I'm sure I taught you everything I knew, right? So, I'd be the only one that could track you down."

Dammit, well he was right about that. If anyone would be able to find me it would be him.

"All I had to do was find the nearest bus station and have Sammy tap into the security cams. We saw you there, noticed you bought a ticket. A few questions later and we knew where you were headin." He went on.

I let out a sigh and shook my head. "Look, the last thing I wanna do is fuck up yours and Sammy's life. So, just let me go my own way and you can go back to normal."

"That ain't your call, kid." He replied. "Sit down. We gotta have a talk."

I shifted on my feet before dropping my duffel and sitting down beside him.

"Here's the thing," He started. "Yeah, this is weird as fuck I'll admit that, and it's gonna take a hell of a long time getting used to. But, you came back here for a reason, right? So why would you just take off?"

My eyes rolled. "You made it pretty clear that you didn't want me there."

"Hey," He elbowed me. "You kinda dropped a friggin bomb on me, Mary. I think anyone woulda responded that way. Wouldn't you have? What if you had a kid that zapped back from the future, you'd piss your pants too."

"Maybe." I sighed. "I dunno, I guess I just expected something different. I was stupid to, yeah- But... I did."

"It wasn't stupid," He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "But you just need to realize that this is gonna take time. You're used to a Dad that don't even exist yet, so you're stuck with _me_. And yeah I can be kind of a dick at times, I'm hard to deal with. But..." He sighed. "We're family. And I guess that's all that matters." Now he stood. "So, are you comin or what?"

I didn't immediately jump out of my seat, even though I wanted to. "I guess I don't have a choice. If I took off, you'd just find me again."

"Pretty much. So let's go. I still need your help with Sam, remember?"

I might've been eager to follow him if I knew he wasn't pretty much forced into bringing me back. If he had actually wanted me with him then yeah, it woulda been different. But, I guess this was a start. So I grabbed my duffel and followed him from the bus station and to the Impala that waited just out front. Sam was leaning against the passenger door, and he offered me a small smile. Cas was sitting in the backseat staring blankly off at nothing.

"So are we cool?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Dad answered. "All good. Let's hit the road."

I jumped in the backseat and Cas barely passed me a glance before saying. "I'm glad you're alright."

"Thanks," I arched a brow at him, noticing that Dad and Sam were whispering about something outside the car. "So, are you gonna tell me how you _really _found me?"

"Excuse me?" Cas shifted his eyes to me.

"Dad just told me a bullshit story. That you'd saw me on the security cams, saw me buy a ticket. Kinda interesting, seeing is that I stowed away on the bus and never actually went into the bus terminal. So, how'd you guys really find me?"

He went noticeably stiff as he eyes shifted back and forth. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I know better than to actually go into the frickin bus terminal. Dad knows me like the back of his hands, he taught me everything I know. I knew they'd be able to find me on the security cameras, so I waited until the bus was loading and sneaked on. So, seriously- How the hell did you find me?"

Now it seemed as though he was sending panicked glances to Dad and Sam, but they were oblivious as they kept on whispering.

"It was a spell," He answered. "A blood spell. All I needed to do was take some of Deans blood and it instantly gives me the locations of any family members."

"Right," I scowled at him. "So why would Dad lie about how he found me then?"

"The spell's not safe. There can be complications, fatal complications." He cleared his throat. "To Dean. Had something went wrong his heart very well might have exploded in his chest. I suppose that's why he lied to you, so you wouldn't be upset."

Was he lying? Dammit, I just couldn't tell. Sometimes the angel was easy to read, and other times that damned blank face and monotone voice made it nearly impossible to tell if what he was saying was complete bullshit. But, I had to admit- That did sound like Dad. He always did reckless shit that could end up getting him killed, but he didn't care- As long as it meant helping out his family. Obviously... Or else why would he have sold his soul for his little brother, right?

But I somehow doubted that Dad would be willing to risk his heart exploding for me. Cause at the moment whenever I'd look into his eyes I didn't see love for his kid there. I saw annoyance and anger. So, yeah... I pretty much had to conclude that Cas was bullshitting me.

Which of course made me wonder how they really found me. Cause I knew Cas couldn't have done it, not with me carrying the hex bag. And I knew Dad would never actually go to Ruby for help. I'm sure I could figure it out if I really thought about it, but when Dad and Sam climbed in the car and we sped off- I found myself not really trying. Mainly because it didn't really matter I guess. He found me, and I hoped that meant something.

* * *

"What do you mean you lost it?!" I shrieked. "How could you have lost it?!"

"Look, I musta dropped it back at the motel or somethin. And since you took off and we were trying to find you it got left behind!" Dad shouted back.

I shook my head. "We gotta go back and get it."

"Hell no," He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. "We're not travelin three states back just for a damn picture, Mary! It ain't like you don't have others."

"Not of that one." I hung my head. "That one was my favorite."

"It's just a picture," He shrugged. "You'll get over it."

What the hell... If he only knew how over protective he was of that damn picture in the future. He kept it tacked up in his bedroom when we weren't hunting, and stuffed in his wallet when we were. It was his favorite picture too. He never said it, but it was kinda obvious that it was. He always said that we looked semi normal in that picture, which was something that never happened with us.

"I'm sorry, ok?" He finally spat. "But we don't got time to fight about some stupid picture. We're supposed to be figuring out a way to stop Sam, right?"

I scowled bitterly as I stared out at the street lights whizzing past. I didn't even know what time it was, it was so late. All I knew was that Dad had woke me up out of a deep sleep announcing that Sam had taken off again and we were gonna track him down. And I guess I chose the wrong time to ask for my god damned picture back, cause turns out- He fucking lost it. Not only that, he didn't give a shit that he lost it. Nice.

"So, what's the GPS sayin? Where's he at?" He dropped the subject pretty damn quick.

"421 Waterman way." I answered.

"How far's that from here?"

"Like five miles."

He floored it and fell silent for the next few minutes, at least until we were a mile out from Sammy's location.

"Here's the thing," He said, startling me out of a daydream. "When we get there, you just stay behind me, ok? Sam won't start anything... More then likely, but that's not speakin for Ruby. So... Just stay behind me. Let me handle it."

"You know I'm not totally useless?" I snapped back. "I can help out, and I can take care of myself. You _are _the one that taught me everything."

"Don't mean I agree with you." I replied.

What the... "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just sayin I don't think I made the right decisions. It was stupid of me to drag you into this."

"You didn't _drag _me into this. I chose it."

Seriously... Why was he pissed... _Again_?

"And I shouldn't have gave you that option. It was stupid. Now I don't know much about parenting but call me crazy, you have a kid- You teach em normal things, like video games and sports, not bow hunting."

I only gaped at him with my eyes narrowed. "Funny you say that- Cause ya know, when I was a kid you always told me bow hunting was an important skill. Sammy used to bitch about _your _Dad teaching _him_, but _you _agreed with it."

What was going on? Was it possible I was changing things already? With only being here a month could I have somehow changed his way of thinking?

"Well, it's done. Can't go changing that now." He sighed. "But just cause I was an idiot in the future doesn't mean I'm gonna be like that now. You chose to come back here so you're gonna have to deal with the consequences." He gave me a sharp stare. "I'm not gonna be my Dad."

I returned the glare. "Ya know, that might actually work if I was a kid, not an adult. You can't exactly tell me what to do."

"Wanna bet?" He smirked sarcastically at me and he received a bitter frown in return. "Hey, as weird as it is, I'm your old man, and you gotta do what I say."

"Oh please." I sank down in my seat, crossing my arms in an obvious pout.

"Don't get sassy with me, I'll turn this car around." He snickered.

"Oh now you're just being a smart ass."

The only reason why he was joking around with me was because he was trying to distract himself from what we'd find Sammy doing. Cause no sooner did we park in front of an old run down building, did Dads face turn sour. He didn't say anything as he climbed out of the car and motioned over his shoulder for me to follow, which I quickly did. He tried to as nonchalantly as possible check the demon slaying knife in his jacket before slipping through some thick brush and approaching a kicked in door.

I already knew what we'd find. Either one, it would be Sam chugging blood, or him ganking some demons with his mind powers. Or of course it could be the more disturbing option, him and Ruby humping each other. That's a mental image a niece could never forget of her Uncle. Gross.

The inside of the building was pretty much busted up beyond repair, the floor littered with smashed dry wall and crumbling ceiling tiles. The windows were boarded up, but there was enough space between the wood to allow in a few slivers of moonlight. Which didn't provide much illumination to see. But I stuck close to Dad, cause it always seemed like he had nocturnal vision or something- Either that or he could just sense where the danger might be. Of course this time it wasn't exactly danger, but yeah- It was disturbing nonetheless.

Voices floated over the air which Dad clearly heard as his pace slowed and he held up his hand to stop me. For a very split second it felt like old times, or well future times, however you wanna look at it. I couldn't count the times that Dad had gone on ahead of me, using hand signals to communicate when we couldn't speak. With a slight wave backwards he wanted me to keep my distance, so I waited while he took a good five paces and then started up again. We kept walking as the voices became more clear until coming to a partially open door which Dad stopped at. He slipped back into the shadows, pushing his back against the wall as he peaked in the crack. I followed his movements and stood beside him, but couldn't see a damn thing past his shoulders. It didn't matter though, the voices were clearly Sammy and Ruby. There was a third voice there too, one that I didn't recognize. It was a man, and he was mumbling some sorta taunt about Lilith and how they wouldn't be able to find her.

I was just waiting for the moment Sam would hulk smash the asshole, which of course would set Dad off into a tailspin. Overall I didn't have to wait long before I heard screaming inside the room and Dad had gone completely stiff. He waited until the screaming stopped before pushing away from the wall and shoving the door open.

When he stepped inside I followed, there was an unconscious or dead guy sitting in a chair in the middle of a devils trap. And of course there stood Sammy and Ruby off to the side.

"Well," Dad said, which caused Sam to spin around in surprise. "I think someone has some explaining to do."

"Dean... Mary." Sam stared down at the body slumped in the chair. "How did..."

"GPS on your phone." Dad interrupted before he could finish that question. "I woke up, noticed you sneaking out and I couldn't help but ask myself why the hell you'd be sneaking out in the middle of the night. Didn't figure calling and askin would do much good, so..." He held out his arms. "Here we are."

I knew my contributing to this convo wouldn't help, so I kept my cake hole shut. As far as I was concerned I'd done my part. I'd told Dad about what Sam was doing, so hopefully he could handle the outcome.

"I can explain..."

"Sure ya can." Dean glared at Ruby. "Lemme guess. The bitch spit out some convincing story, you can take down Lilith, save the world? Yeah, Sammy- I've heard that before, remember? And you also remember what Cas said, right? To stop this psychic crap or else _he'd _stop you? What happened to that, huh?" Sam only clenched his jaw at that question. "Here I thought that you'd listened, that you weren't stupid enough to start this crap again. But, yeah I guess I was an idiot to trust you since _apparently_ you ganked Alastair, right?"

Now Sam shifted his eyes to me. "Who told you that?"

"Cas..." Dad lied for me, which pretty much amazed me. "You think that'd be somethin he'd keep to himself?"

Sam let out a sigh, and I hated the fact that he was standing in front of Ruby protectively.

"Look, it's not what you think. You know just as well as I do that if we don't stop Lilith, than she's just gonna keep breaking seals. I'm trying to stop all of this."

"_Righttt_." Dad sneered. "And, uh... According to what I've heard, _I'm _the one that's supposed to stop it. Not you. The angels named me specifically. It's my job, not yours." Dad pulled the knife from his jacket and Ruby took a step back. "You gotta choice to make, Sammy. Us, or that bitch."

"Dean, don't be stupid-" Ruby said, which really wasn't a good idea at all, it just set Dad off. "I'm trying to help you."

My stomach started turning somersaults because I knew that if Dad gave Sammy this choice who'd he'd end up choosing. Because he didn't know the truth, and as much as I knew it could be dangerous to tell them what I knew- I didn't think there was any way around it anymore.

"Da... Dean." I shook my head, correcting myself. "The three of us need to have a talk alone... Without Ruby."

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea," Sam nodded. "Ruby, why don't you take off, swing by the ER and get this guy some help, huh?"

Ruby started for the devils trap after Sam scratched a line through it and helped lug the half unconscious man to his feet. She started for a backdoor and surprising enough Dad didn't make a move for her because chances were if he did, Sam would just stop him. I waited until I heard the sound of her car faint in the distance before letting out a deep breath.

"Ok, here's the thing." I said. "You both seem to be forgetting that I know everything that goes down. You told me everything." I looked to Dad. "I know what happens with the seals, with Lilith, with Sammy and Ruby..." I locked eyes with Sam who had gone stiff. "I know _everything_."

"Everything?" Sam lowered his hands to his sides. "What's that exactly?"

"You really want me to say, Sammy?" My brows arched.

He swallowed several times over before lowering his eyes in shame.

"Spit it out, kid-" Dad said, nudging me. "What do you know?"

I moved across the room and stared down at the blood splatter surrounding the devils trap.

"For starters, I know how it is that Sam's able to nuke the demons so easily-" I paused and Sam let out a low deep sigh. "And yeah that's important but I think that I need to tell you what happens if he keeps goin with it." I expected for there to be some kind of sign that I was fucking up somehow by telling them this, but there was nothing. "I'm sure you're gonna think I'm full of shit, or that I'm wrong, but... Killing Lilith isn't gonna solve anything, because it's not that she's gonna break the final seal... She _is _the final seal. Killing her sets Lucifer free."

I looked to Sam first, knowing he'd be the one more likely to not believe me- And his face wasn't one to disappoint. He looked completely blown away.

"What?" He said. "That's can't be right... Ruby said..."

"Ruby's a lying bitch, Sam!" I snapped back. "She's manipulating you! She's working with Lilith, she knows about all of this. She wants Lucifer out of his cage and she's using you to do it because you're the only one who can!"

Now I finally moved my eyes to Dad and while he was pissed, a part of him seemed relieved that someone actually sided with him for once.

"But, that doesn't make sense!" Sam's voice echoed through the empty room. "Why would she do that?"

"Uh, she's a demon, Sam." I shrugged. "Kinda comes with the job description, right? They lie, they twist the facts around just to fuck you over and that's exactly what she's doing to you!"

They fell silent, until Dad cleared his throat. "What else do you know, Mary? What else can you tell us?"

"You actually believe that, Dean?" Sam snorted. "This is crap. How do we know that's true? Everything that's happened so far hasn't shown at all that's what Ruby's intentions are!"

"Oh, so now I'm a liar?" I wasn't surprised to hear that crap come out of Sam, he was so stubborn and stupid sometimes I just wanted to punch him in the throat. "Yeah, it's not like I came back in time or nothin, it's not like Dad never told me this story before." After taking a deep breath to calm down I went on. "Ok, I'm just gonna have to spit it all out I guess. Open and honest right, that's the only way." I looked to Dad. "Sam's getting his powers from drinking demon blood." Dad's eyes went wide while Sam went ashen. "And yeah, that's awful and I'm sure you're gonna kick the crap outa him for that later, but that's not the issue. The issue is is that if you keep goin with this Sam- You're gonna let Lucifer out and a lot of people are gonna die because of it. I wouldn't lie about this, I wouldn't make this shit up. It's true. Why the fuck do you think I came back here in the first place? To stop you!"

After I blurt all of it out, I stopped and tried to catch my breath, waiting for my Dad to freak out and start pounding Sams face in. But he didn't, he only stood there with that look of disappointment that I'd seen a few times when I was a kid. And to me, that was much more painful than hearing him scream or rant around.

"How could you do that, Sammy?" He asked, his tone quiet. "You had to have known that was wrong?"

Sam refused to peel his attention off the floor. "I'm sorry, it's not what you think. You were gone, I was here... What was I supposed to do?"

"Not this!" Dad stomped forward. "Mary... What can be done about it? Or is there anything? Some kind of detox maybe?"

I shook my head. "I don't know... Since we're catching it kinda early, maybe... I know that you tried to do that later on after he'd been chugging it even more and it nearly killed him."

"You think maybe Cas could do something?" Sam asked and finally he didn't sound pissed anymore.

"Right now I don't even think he knows what you're doing. But, maybe... I really don't know. You'd have to ask him."

Dad paced back and forth for a minute. "Ok so now we know what woulda happened. Sam... You think that's motivation enough to quit with this crap?"

"Yeah," Sam forced his eyes on mine. "If I would've known about this from the beginning..."

"We know," I cut in. "You thought you were doin the right thing."

"I can't believe that..." He paused, cringing. "That I actually let him out."

"Let's get outa here." Dad finished motioning towards the door. "We can talk about this more at the motel, and we'll give Cas a call and see what he has to say about it."

I followed them from the room, eventually the building, and back to the car. And the entire drive back to the motel my stomach wouldn't stop flipping somersaults. I figured I woulda felt better by this point, knowing I'd finally told them the truth and thinking maybe now Sam could see the decisions he was making wasn't for the greater good. But I didn't feel any better, and somehow I got the distinct feeling that I'd just fucked things up even more than they already were.


	6. Chapter 6

Cas looked pretty damn surprised I'd say once Dad told him the news, as he stood there with his eyes wide and face blank. Sam only sat on the edge of his bed with his hands knotted in front of him, refusing to make eye contact with anyone, and Dad? Well, he still looked just as pissed.

"So I'm wonderin," He said. "What the hell are your angel pals doin, huh? They had to have been hip to all this?"

Cas swallowed once over before replying weakly. "I imagine they did, although- I hadn't been alerted of it." He shook his head. "I would have expected more from my brothers. I never would have imagined that they actually intended for the apocalypse to happen all along."

"Yeah, well-" Dean chugged at his beer. "They did, and they lied to you about it, man."

"I realize that now."

"So what are we gonna do about it, huh? How're we gonna fix this?"

Yeah that wasn't a question that was easy to answer, even for an angel. Because what would he say about his so called family that had been lying to him and making him believe they were trying to stop the apocalypse- When they wanted it to happen? When they told him that they wanted to stop Lilith and the seals from breaking when they were actually ensuring that they broke? They wanted Sammy to keep drinking demon blood, to kill Lilith and let Lucifer out. Yeah, it was a shocking blow to the poor dude, and I felt sorry for him of course. Even though this Cas felt jack squat for me, it didn't mean that my feelings suddenly vanished. I still cared for him, of course.

"I suppose I would suggest avoiding Ruby, avoiding Lilith and refusing to take part in anything that has to do with the angels." Cas finally answered. "It's going to be difficult."

"What about Sam's problem?" I asked.

He flicked his eyes to mine before lowering them back to the floor. "I'm not certain if I would be of much aid. The only thing I can think of would be to let the demon blood work its way from his system naturally. It might be a lengthy and painful process, but I don't believe it would kill him. And should something go wrong, I would always be there."

"There's gotta be something else?" Dad said. "Some other way of fixin it. Couldn't you just lay your hands on and fix him?"

"No, it's not as simple as that. This has been stemming for decades, since he was an infant and Azazel first bled into his mouth. It's not so easy to clean up a mess that goes so deep."

"But if we let him detox naturally, it could cause more harm than good?" I said now.

"Guys," Sam stood from the bed. "I think that this is my call, not yours. And... I wanna fix this, even if it could end badly. It's my fault that this happened and I gotta take responsibility for it. So... We need to figure out where and how we're gonna do this. Obviously I can't go to a hospital or some rehab clinic, they don't have a pill to help someone that was drinking demon blood."

Dad was disinterested in his beer by this point as he sat it on the dresser and started pacing.

"We can go to Bobby's." He said. "Strap you down in the panic room, that way you can't hurt yourself. If Mary was right, it's gonna get really bad once the blood starts to wear off."

Sam only nodded, his long hair falling in his eyes. "Yeah... That could work I guess."

"So now all we need to do is figure out what we're gonna do about Ruby." Dad went on. "She needs to go."

"She's too smart for that." Sam sighed. "She probably already knows what's going on and took off by now. It's not like I'm gonna respond to her calls anymore anyway."

"Well, whatever- We'll deal with that bitch later." Dean grabbed his bag. "Let's go, we got a long drive to South Dakota."

I think Cas decided to just stick with us from this point on, since I pretty much confirmed that the note his future self sent was pretty damn accurate. It was obvious he couldn't trust his superiors anymore, or anyone else for that matter. We were the only ones that actually wanted to fix things and stop the apocalypse from happening.

So he climbed in the backseat opposite of me, and we started on the drive. I was actually a little eager to meet Bobby. I had heard stories of him ever since I was a kid. About how awesome he was, and was basically Dad and Sam's Father. In fact, he was more of a Dad to them than John Winchester had ever been, and when he died they were devastated. I wasn't sure how he was gonna take to meeting me, but I was still eager to meet him. I just wish it was under happier circumstances.

The entire ten hour drive no one really said much unless it pertained to food or stopping for gas. Sam was the most quiet out of all of us, as he stared aimlessly out the window lost in his own thoughts. I couldn't imagine what mighta been goin through his head right then, knowing that if he had kept goin on with this stupid plan then he would break the entire world. He never would have been able to forgive himself, I knew that much. Even before the incident where Dad and Sam died, he was still hating himself just as much as if it had happened yesterday. I hoped, no... I actually prayed that I might have stopped it from happening. I mean, if Sam had the sense smacked back into him, then why would he ever change his mind and go back to Ruby and start in with the Lilith killing mission again?

I couldn't tell if Dad might have been pissed at me or not for not admitting this sooner, and I wasn't sure if Sam was pissed at me for blabbing his secret. Basically, they both could have hated me even more than before, I just didn't know.

When we finally pulled into the drive of Bobby's junkyard, I felt myself searching the entire area surrounding. I wondered what it was like when they were kids and Grandpa would leave them there, what all they did. I knew Bobby hadn't listened to Grandpa when he ordered him to teach Dad and Sam how to shoot, or things like that- And instead he had done normal things with them, like playing baseball or taking them fishing. From what Dad always said, Bobby claimed that since they were kids they deserved to have at least a little of a childhood. No wonder they loved him so much, he was the only one that cared about that.

Dad had called Bobby during the drive, so he knew we were coming and met us on the porch steps.

I took a good long look at him before climbing out of the car. He was exactly the way I'd pictured him. Trucker cap, scruffy beard and ratty t-shirt with an even rattier plaid button up over the top. Past the harsh exterior that was his clothing, his eyes looked kind, and he practically lit up when Dad and Sam climbed out of the car. Once he saw me however, the confusion instantly smacked him in the face.

"Hey, Bobby." Dad said, giving him a tight hug.

"Boys," Bobby said, barely passing a glance at Cas. "So... Who do we got here?"

Dad cleared his throat awkwardly before barely peaking at me from over his shoulder. "That's kind of a long story. But, uh... To make a long story as short as possible. She's my daughter."

Bobby's face fell flat. "Come again?"

"Yeah..." Dad chuckled. "Crazy ain't it? But yeah, she kinda shipped herself back, or well- Cas did. Like I said it's a long story and we'll get into that later."

I don't think Bobby believed him as he gawked at me in surprise, and I figured he'd probably wanna douse me in holy water just to make sure I wasn't a demon. But, seeing is that no one else was freakin out he only moved to the door and showed us inside.

First thoughts once I saw Bobby's house was that it looked like a library had thrown up in it. Books were stacked in corners, on tables, on other pieces of furniture. Past that was dust and the scent of old spice and booze. And yeah, it might have been a little rough around the edges but it somehow felt homey. Painted on the ceiling of his den was a huge devils trap.

Bobby offered everyone a beer which Dad and Sam were quick to accept, once I got a bottle though Dad quickly took it away from me.

"No." He barked, laying it aside.

"The hell..." I scowled. "I'm twenty two."

"No." He repeated and I scowled all the more.

Little did Dad know that before he died in the future, he refused to let me drink then either.

"So," Bobby sighed, sitting at his desk. "What's this about? You didn't really give me much details on the phone."

I only stuck close to my Dad while he started in with explaining. And while he explained everything, from me coming back to help them, to what I told them would happen with Lilith and the seals- Bobby remained completely silent. Sam and Cas too didn't speak and only listened. Once he was finished Bobby instantly grabbed a bottle of scotch and downed a large gulp.

"Well," he said. "Guess we got work to do." Now he pulled himself to his feet. "Ok what'd we do first?"

"First things first." Dad answered. "Is we gotta get Sammy cleaned up. Then after that, I say we figure out a way to stop all this. Someway that avoids Lilith and Ruby, and all the dick angels out there."

"Last seal or not, I'm not very fond of the thought that the previous 65 would be broken." Cas added. "We still need to prevent them from breaking."

"But how?" Sam asked. "If the angels were actually helping us out sure, maybe we could prevent that. But, they're all for them breaking. What would we be able to do?"

"Maybe taking out Lilith before the seals are broken?" I suggested. "She's the only one that can let Lucifer out. She's the very first demon. If she's dead, their plan goes down the crap shoot."

Cas shook his head. "It's highly improbable that we could accomplish that task, Mary. She's very powerful and something as simple as stabbing her with the knife wouldn't work. She's immune to all the usual methods. Exorcism, the demon killing blade, holy water, even my powers wouldn't be enough to stop her."

Dad sighed. "Yeah hate to admit it but he's right. He couldn't even gank Alastair."

"What about an angel blade?" I offered. "Wouldn't that be strong enough?"

"Angel blade?" Bobby questioned. "And that would be?"

I looked to Cas and he answered. "The only thing that can kill an angel. And yes, it would probably work but actually getting close enough to use it on Lilith would be impossible."

"Awesome." Dad flopped down on the dusty sofa. "So we got no plans and are just as screwed as ever."

Sam pushed away from the wall where he'd been standing.

"Well maybe not totally screwed. Mary said that I'm the only one capable of killing Lilith and letting Lucifer out of his cage. Since I'm not doing that, at least we know he'll stay stuck in there." He motioned down the hallway. "You should probably go ahead and lock me down. Might as well get started with this."

"No reason to yet," Bobby replied. "Your withdrawal ain't started."

"No... But it won't be long. It's been a couple weeks since I've... Well, you know. Which means I've got a couple days maybe before it starts to kick in."

So Dad followed him from the room and I slowly crept my way as well. We started down a set of rickety basement stairs and to a thick iron door that looked as though it'd been ripped off a bank vault. Dad pulled it open and I took a quick glance to see a round iron enclosed room with a devils trap on the floor and the air vent in the ceiling. Sammy stepped inside and let out a sigh.

"Well," He said. "Guess we hope for the best." Dad only stood there and stared at him. "I know it probably doesn't mean anything Dean, but... I'm _really _sorry for this, I thought I was doing the right thing... I thought I was stopping Lilith and the apocalypse..." He sighed sadly. "I'm sorry."

I could tell Dad wanted to respond to that, but it was difficult to determine what exactly might have spewed out of his mouth. Knowing Dad, it probably would have been a lecture. Something along the lines of, "This is your own fault for siding with a demon, for chugging down that poison and believing the bitch when it should have been obvious". Which Sammy didn't really need right now, he felt guilty enough. So, instead of doing that Dad started to close the door.

"Just take it easy in there, Sammy. If you need anything, holler." Dad replied.

Sam only nodded, giving me the weakest of smiles before the thick iron door slammed shut in his face.

* * *

Three days later the hell began for Sammy, it started with the shakes, which was normal withdrawal behavior. Then came being violently ill to the point he was vomiting anything and everything in his stomach for hours on end. Then, of course came the hallucinations, the screaming and pleading for help, for death, for some kind of salvation. He was screaming until all hours of the night, only having a seldom hour or two in between that he managed to sleep or choke down some food and water. As it turns out, I was the only one he'd let into the panic room while he was in this state. He claimed it was because I knew about it beforehand, it wouldn't have been as traumatizing for me. Basically he didn't want Dad or Bobby to see him like that.

I tried not to let him see that I was just as upset over this as they would have been. I didn't like seeing Sammy like that. A huge sasquatch of a guy reduced to a quivering heap on the floor, shaking and crying, with pale skin and dark circles under his eyes.

"M-Mary." He stuttered, shivering from the wall he was huddled up against. "Y-you need to lock me-" In came a coughing fit. "You need to lock me down."

"You are locked down, Sam." I replied. "You're in the panic room, remember?"

"N-No. That's not wh-what I mean." He weakly shifted his eyes to the cot. "Cuff me down."

"Why?"

"I feel like I-I'm... Battling in my own head. I'm afraid I'll hurt someone, or myself..." He reached over and latched an icy sweat caked hand on my wrist. "P-please."

"Yeah ok, Sammy." I somehow helped him pull to his feet as he wobbly stumbled to the cot and fell onto it. "Just relax, don't get worked up."

The shivers were getting worse by this point, and I glanced at the sandwich he hadn't touched and the glass of water that he only managed to get two sips from. I grabbed the cuffs from the desk and by now he had passed out, so it was relatively easy cuffing his ankles and wrists to the cot. Once I was through I felt his forehead and he was burning up. No not normal burning up, there was an unnatural heat radiating off of him that I couldn't understand how he hadn't died from. Any normal person would have by now. I resumed with what I had been doing previously, which was putting icy cold rags on his forehead. After an hour and deciding that a fever of 100.2 wasn't as bad as 105.5, I stood from the cot and left the panic room, closing the door and immediately sinking to the floor, resting my back against the wall.

I was completely exhausted. I hadn't slept in two days, and hadn't bothered to eat or drink much. Dad had offered to take over for me several times, but I was respecting Sammy's wishes and making him stay out. For the moment all was silent in the panic room, so I took that opportunity to close my eyes and try to catch a power nap. It must have worked, because I was woke up about an hour later by a gentle nudging on my shoulder.

I figured it must have been Dad or Bobby again, cause they were usually the only ones to come down here, but instead it was Cas.

"You're exhausted." He stated. "Why don't you go get some rest. I can watch over Sam."

I shook my head, taring my groggy eyes from his. "No... Sammy asked me to look out for him, so I'm gonna do it."

He sighed, and actually surprised me when he sat down beside me. He kept his arms resting on his knees as he stared straight ahead at the wall.

"Making yourself weak and ill isn't going to service Sam, or anyone for that matter."

"Well, I made a promise. And I don't break them. I'll be fine." I sighed deeply. "Ya know, I can't help but wonder if I woulda said something about this a month ago if it would've been so bad."

"It would have, regardless of the amount of time. Even had Sam only drank an ounce of demon blood he would still suffer immensely after it began to leave his system." He replied. "That's what happens when you do something so drastic."

I rested the back of my head against the wall. "I knew about all of this, obviously. Sam drinking the blood, how hard it was on him once Dad tried to get him to clean out. But actually seeing it... Yeah, I know it might be confusing to you and Dad that I'm so upset over this, but..."

"You've known them," He interrupted. "You grew up around them, they're your family. It's perfectly understandable to me, Mary."

"If I tell you something will you promise not to tell anyone?" I asked.

He nodded slightly, refusing to move his eyes from the wall. "Of course."

"This is... Extremely hard for me... Being here. I dunno, I had this thought in my head that I'd come back and it wouldn't be great, exactly, but I at least figured that Dad would have accepted me just a little bit. I know it was a shocker, me zapping back here. But it's just that he's such a huge contrast to the Dad I had in the future." My fingers started anxiously tapping on my knees. "I didn't expect for him to suddenly turn around and be like, oh yeah ok I have a daughter, cool- But... I dunno. I just don't think I should be here."

"Here?" Finally now he looked at me.

"Yeah, I mean I want to be _here_ here, like in this year because the whole point of me comin back was because I wanted to help save Dad and Sammy, but... That doesn't really mean I gotta stick around. I took off before because I didn't wanna cause anymore disruption to their lives."

"And yet Dean still came and retrieved you. If you were disrupting his life to the point he was perhaps angry or unhappy, then why would he have come and picked you up at that bus station? Wouldn't he have simply let you go?"

"Guilt?" I retorted. "He felt guilty for it and brought me back only cause of that."

"Or," Cas sighed, staring down at me. "Maybe there's a possibility that he actually cares?"

"Don't get my hopes up, dude."

"Anyhow... You should get some rest. You can't attend to Sam if you're nearly ready to collapse yourself." He stood and held his hand out. "So go get an hours worth of sleep if you're really insisting on catering to him. I can watch him in the mean time."

I wanted to argue but I was too damned tired, so I took his hand and he pulled me up. I mumbled something to him, I think it was thanks for listening, before laggardly dragging myself up the stairs and falling onto the sofa in Bobby's den. It was late, past 2 a.m, and Dad must have been asleep upstairs. Bobby too wasn't awake, so I had no one to be my alarm clock and ended up sleeping until dawn. For a moment I only laid there staring at the dusty ceiling before pulling myself off the sofa and returning downstairs. Cas was standing outside the panic room door, like a guard dog with his hands planted in his trench coat pockets and still staring at the wall.

"Has he made any noise?" I asked.

If it was at all possible to startle the angel I think I might have done it as he quickly jerked his eyes towards mine.

"No, he's been still for a few hours now. I think the worst is over." He answered.

A relieved sigh escaped me. "Thank god. These last few days have been pure hell on him."

I moved to the door and pulled the small window open and peaked inside. Even at this distance I could see that Sam wasn't so pale anymore, and his breathing was steady. It looked as though he was finally sleeping comfortably and without any nightmares or hallucinations.

"Hey," I heard Dad say from the bottom of the stairs, just as he did every morning since we got here. "How's he doin?"

"Better," I answered before Cas could. "He's sleeping for once."

Dad joined me at the panic room door window, taking peaks inside. "How much longer do ya think this is gonna take?"

"There really is no way of knowing, Dean." Cas answered. "But as I was telling Mary, I think the worst is over."

"Good," He then nudged me. "I made breakfast, go take a load off since Sammy's asleep."

_He _made _breakfast_? Yeah, shocker. Dad couldn't cook anything except burgers and toast, which is honestly what I expected when I left the basement with him following and entered the kitchen. Instead I found _bacon _and toast, which I guess wasn't so hard to make either.

After grabbing a piece of toast and strip of bacon, I sat at the table and tried to force it down. I wasn't even hungry, I just wanted to keep an eye on Sam and then maybe sleep for the next week.

Dad sat down in front of me with his own share of breakfast, which just so happened to be a plate piled high with bacon. There was something on his mind, clearly- It was so friggin obvious. He always had a look on his face when he was gonna bring up some subject that mighta been touchy.

"So, uh-" He started. "I guess I should say thanks. Ya know, for lookin after Sammy."

I only rubbed my head. "You don't have to thank me for that. I'm used to taking care of Sam."

He stopped chewing with his mouth full. "What'd you mean?"

After pushing my plate away I sat back. "Lots of things happened to him, which all started with this. After that it all kinda went downhill. And, well... He had good days and bad days. Sometimes he'd be sick in bed, other times he'd be perfectly fine."

"Maybe it was cause he was just gettin up there in years?" He suggested, and obviously it was because he refused to think about his brother being permanently damaged from everything that had happened. "Just what happens to him, huh?"

I swallowed a gulp of scalding hot coffee. "I dunno if I can say."

"Just say it," He shrugged. "If you're here changin things, then maybe it won't happen?"

Yeah but did I want to tell him? Dad would be devastated if he learned all the crap that happened to his little brother in the future. It's not something that I could easily talk about, since it was pretty tough to witness. Sam hadn't been right since I was a kid, he'd have days where he seemed normal enough, and then others... Well, let's just say that if this had happened to some other family, some _normal _family, then he'd have been locked in a padded room and they'd of thrown away the key.

"Lotsa shit happens." I said. "Which I'm hoping won't since I'm here. But... It took a toll on him. I think once he hit 40 things started to go downhill. Least that's what you told me. It started with mood swings, he'd be normal old Sammy one second and screaming and throwing things the next." Dads face went blank. "There wasn't any kind of meds he coulda taken for it though, cause it wasn't exactly a mental thing, it was just... Everything... The demon blood, Lucifer, and more crap that happens later on down the line. It changed him."

"So, he just went nuts?"

"Sorta, I mean it was more than that. He got sick a lot too, like deathly sick and there wasn't a reason for it. He'd be in bed for days at a time, shaking and mumbling things. Then like someone snapped their fingers he'd be back to normal and up readin books or messin on his computer like it never happened at all." My fingers started tapping on the table. "Worse thing was, is that he didn't even remember flippin out like that. He had no idea it was happening."

It seemed he could sense what I was inwardly trying to hide, the mask I was attempting to wear must have cracked.

"How'd we bite it?" He asked now. "What happened?"

Why did he have to ask me that? I was perfectly content with never thinking of that awful day again. I thought since I was with them again, the younger versions at least, it would help me to forget it. But... It didn't matter how young Dad was right then, his eyes were the same, and that was enough to drudge it all back up. I only then noticed that since I had gotten to this year I'd tried my best to avoid looking at them.

"I don't think I wanna talk about that." I answered.

"Tell me," He crossed his arms, forgetting his breakfast. "Considerin it's me and Sammy this happens to, we kinda have a right to know."

"Trust me it's not somethin you wanna hear."

"Just tell me, I'm not askin again." He glared at me and I snorted out a laugh.

"What, if I don't you gonna send me to my room?"

"Somethin like that, now just say it."

I kept my attention on my coffee cup from here on out.

"Hunt gone bad, went to check out what we thought was a haunting. Sammy had one of his episodes only, this one was much much worse. Long story short, something snapped in him, he thought I was some kind of monster and tried to shoot me. You dove in front of me and took a blast to the chest. After you were gone, Sammy came out of it long enough to see what he'd done..." I paused and Dad's eyes were glued to the table as he listened. "He put a bullet in his head because of it. I couldn't even stop him." My eyes began to tear up which I tried to blink away. "And yeah, maybe some people might think that since you weren't young guys anymore it ain't a big deal, but..."

"It is." He interrupted. "I don't care if we were thirty or eighty, it don't matter. We're gonna find a way to stop that from happening... Hey," He knocked his knuckles on the table to get my attention. "For the record, it ain't so bad that you're here ya know. So just in case you thought about maybe taking off again... Don't."

He wouldn't have been able to miss the confusion on my face even if he tried. I couldn't help but wonder if maybe he had been listening in on the conversation I had with Cas.

And speak of the devil, he came into the kitchen shortly after both Dad and I had gone mute. He didn't say anything, only leaned against the archway with his arms crossed before Dad said.

"So, Cas- What can we do to stop what's gonna happen in the future? And I don't wanna hear none of that all roads lead to the same destination crap," My brows squeezed together after he said that. "I'm serious... What can we do, _really _do, to change what goes down?"

Cas' eyes squinted. "Dean, we've talked about this..."

"And I say there's gotta be something. You're a frickin angel, use your almighty brain or somethin. I don't care what's been said about this kinda thing. I know there's gotta be something we can do to stop what happens in the future, from happening. So... Suggestions?"

Yeah I didn't know what the hell Dad was talking about. Future Cas had told me that I might have been able to prevent what happened if I came back and changed a few things. But if I was gonna go by what it sounded like Dad had said, _this _Cas claimed that wasn't possible. So... Who was I supposed to believe? Suddenly it felt like my throat slammed shut as a rush of panic hit me. I suppose the one most likely to lie or stretch the truth with me would be _my _Cas... The Cas who sent me back here. It definitely sounded like something he would have done. Lying to me to spare my feelings, and sending me back to be with my family because it would have made me happy. But if that was true, then it meant this trip would accomplish nothing. Everything that happened to Dad and Sam would still happen eventually.

"I don't know." Cas sighed. "If there was anything it would be completely going off the course you had gone before Mary came back here. She knows what happens, but I highly doubt she knows it detail by tiny detail."

Dad looked at me. "Well? What all do you know?"

Taken aback, I fumbled my words slightly. "I-I only know what all you told me. I'm sure there's little things that you skipped, but I know all the biggies?"

Dad arched his brows and stepped into the den, returning seconds later with Sammy's laptop in hand. After sitting it down in front of me he tapped his index finger on to top of it.

"Type everything down, every single thing you can remember." He said.

"But," I only stared at the laptop. "I'm not supposed to tell..."

"Fuck that, Mary." He interrupted. "Let's just say you don't tell us everything, you keep it a secret, and it all happens anyway, we're fucked regardless, so... Just type it all out and we'll give this a shot. Either way it could end bad." He gave me his signature Dad look. "Do it, Mary."

Well I suppose I had no way around this so I pulled the laptop open and took a deep breath. This was gonna take a while.


	7. Chapter 7

I had been typing for hours, to the point that I didn't even notice that Sam had dragged himself out of the panic room until he sat in the chair across from me with a blanket wrapped around him.

"Hey," I said, pulling my eyes away from the laptop screen. "How're you feeling?"

"Better-" He replied weakly. "Well, not as bad as before at least."

He tried to smile through the shivers and Dad laid a bowl of hot soup in front of him.

"Try to choke down a few bites, Sammy-" He said. "You need somethin in your stomach."

Sam took a few deep breaths before reaching out a shaky hand and spilling more soup on the table and his lap, then actually getting it into his mouth. But he managed to eat a little bit anyhow.

"Where's Bobby?" Sam asked weakly.

"Supply run." Dad answered. "Should be back soon." He then directed his attention to me. "How you comin with that, kid?"

I stopped typing long enough to rub my eyes. "Well it's gonna take a while, I've got years worth of stories to write down but, I guess ok."

He sat down next to Sam. "Why don't you tell us some of it huh. That way we can start gettin prepared."

"I still don't know if this was such a good idea," I sighed. "I could really mess things up by telling you everything."

Sam and dad exchanged glances as if I wouldn't notice. Yeah they knew something I didn't and I figured it wasn't something I'd be happy to hear. I was already suspecting that my Cas had lied to me about fixing things here, and they were just making me even more paranoid.

"Well, as I told you before. If Sammy had kept on what he was doin, Lucifer woulda been released from his cage." I said anyhow.

"And if that had happened," Sam said. "What would have gone down next?"

I stared at the screen with a knot in my stomach.

"Well remember this only would have happened if you actually did it. But, from what Da- I mean Dean, told me you and Sammy were pretty much born for that. Because it wasn't _just_ Sam getting infected with demon blood as a baby was to let Lucifer out, it was because he... Well he was meant to be his vessel."

I knew they wouldn't respond well to that and I was right. Dad immediately stood, practically throwing his chair behind him and if Sammy was well enough he probably would have done the same.

"His vessel? So he woulda been possessed by the devil?" Dads fists clenched. "Wait a second. Don't a person gotta give their consent for that?" I nodded. "So that means Sam actually said yes to the bastard?"

"Well there's more to it than that." I tried to ignore the way Sam was staring at the floor in shame. "You see, you didn't really know what else to do. Lucifer was out, you wanted him back in the cage. You found a way to open it but it's not like asking the devil to walk back in it was achievable. So, Sam said yes only because he wanted to get Lucifer back in the cage."

"And... did I?" He asked hopefully.

"Yeah, you did. You jumped in the cage and were locked in there with him."

"Holy crap..." Dad breathed out then grabbed his chair and flopped in it. "Well, wait... If he was locked in the cage with Lucifer, then how'd he get out?"

That I couldn't answer. "I dunno. That was never somethin you told me. I'd ask but you'd always say it wasn't important."

"Well that's probably not a good sign." Sam shook his head. "You must have done something risky Dean to get me out." He pushed his soup aside. "So I'm meant to be Lucifer's vessel? No wonder Ruby was so eager to get me trained up."

"Angels and their vessels, man." Dad grumbled. "Total bullshit."

"Yeah," I flicked my eyes from man to man. "Thing is... Is that you were supposed to be a vessel too."

Dad's face lost all emotion. "Uh, what?"

"Yeah. For Michael. After Michael and Lucifer took over you there was supposed to be some big show down that would pretty much roast half the planet. You never said yes, you refused right down to the last second. I dunno who Michael ended up choosing in the long run, all I know was that it had to be someone of our bloodline."

Sam's brows furrowed. "But that's impossible. All of our family's dead. Who would he have picked?"

"Unless he resurrected someone," Dad replied. "Maybe a cousin or an uncle. Or maybe even our Dad?"

"No," I shook my head. "It wasn't your Dad. I know that much. I just know it was someone related to you, and after it happened Lucifer and Michael met up at the place for the fight, Sam took control back of his mind and both Michael and Lucifer were locked in the cage."

"Where was Cas during all of this?" Dad asked.

"I dunno. All you told me was that he was there the entire time helpin you guys out. He risked his ass a million times and even got nuked once or twice but god brought him back."

"What?" Cas suddenly said from the kitchen doorway. "God resurrected me?"

I jumped slightly once I heard his voice, then nodded. "Yeah. Apparently god didn't want this fight to happen anymore than you guys did. He resurrected Cas a couple times, saved you and Sam just after Lucifer was let out. He helped out every now and then, but of course no one knew who the hell he was or where he was."

Cas looked completely dumbfounded after he heard that- To the point that he actually came into the kitchen, grabbed a spare chair and sat at the table with us.

"So my father _is_ out there?" He said just above a whisper. "And he knows what we're trying to prevent? I never would have imagined that he would actually resurrect _me_. Why me? I'm a very low ranking angel in heaven. There are thousands that would have been more deserving of his mercy."

"No, apparently not, Cas. He knows what's goin on and you're the only one he's done that too. He didn't even bother getting Michael out of the cage. What does that tell you?"

He didn't answer and instead Sam did.

"That he agreed with us. That he really didn't want the apocalypse to happen." He huffed out a deep breath. "Wow. I kinda don't know how to respond to that."

"So if god was really backin our play, then why didn't he just snap his fingers and stop all of this to begin with?" Dad asked.

"He wouldn't have been able to interfere with prophecy." Cas answered. "God or not, things need to play out as they were destined to I'd imagine." He looked from each of us. "Or the way _we_ wanted it to play out."

Ok the knot in my stomach was gone now, thankfully. I wasn't struck down by a bolt of lightning for telling them this, and everything else seemed normal enough. So maybe we actually could prevent all of that from happening.

* * *

A little over a week went by and Sam was pretty much as good as new. He was still a little weak, especially if it involved something strenuous, but overall he was bouncing back better than I figured he would. It didn't take long for Dad to find a case in Nebraska, a haunting at an old run down amusement park that had been closed for at least ten years. Yeah, it was gonna be a difficult one, a place as big as that and no way of knowing who or what mighta been killing people, but it was a job. And I could tell that he was getting antsy sitting around with nothing to do.

"Ok," Sam said, sitting in front of his laptop. "According to what's reported there's been three deaths in the last five months. Kids, naturally since they're the only ones that would actually explore an abandoned amusement park."

"How'd they die?" I asked.

"Well," He sighed. "They were with a group, all of them, and got separated according to the witnesses. They found them about an hour later completely gutted near the Ferris Wheel."

"Ouch," Dad said. "And no one saw anything strange?"

"Not really, but they went there because of the rumor the place was haunted."

I rolled my eyes. "You'd think that since two people had already died then they'd have the sense to not go explore it. Seriously, do people not think of these things?"

"Well it's not just three people actually," Sam continued. "There's been a string of deaths over the last ten years, that kinda died down until just recently."

"So what stirred it up again?" Dad asked, sitting at the table.

"No security? And the rumors of the haunting I guess. Supposed haunted amusement park, a pack of stupid kids and yeah... You gotta expect something bad happening." Sam closed his laptop.

"So other than the gutted teenagers, what other deaths were on the property?"

Sam shrugged. "Uh, there were a few rides gone bad. A twelve year old boy fell from the Ferris wheel after his seat came unhooked, a older guy was crushed between two bumper cars, and..." He scratched the back of his head. "A clown kind of... Hanged himself in the haunted house."

"What the hell kinda amusement park was this?" I snapped.

Dad chuckled. "Hey, Sammy- How much you wanna bet it's the ghost of the dead clown, huh? That's gonna be fun... Right?"

"Shut up." Sam barked back.

My brows arched. "Oh yeah, I forgot about your clown phobia."

"Great," Sam rolled his eyes. "So you know about that too, huh?"

"Oh yeah. Believe me you got picked on a lot when I was a kid."

Sam flashed a bitch face towards Dad. "It's nice to know that even when we're middle aged you're still going on with that crap."

"No, it's sad that you're middle aged and _still _afraid of clowns little brother." Dad sneered.

"Whatever, so when are we leaving?"

Sam was clearly pouting now, either that or dreading this new job. It had absolutely nothing to do with the upcoming apocalypse, seals breaking, demons or angels and I was just fine with that. Dad had pretty much decided that we were gonna avoid anything that had to do with it, because he was determined to make sure that what I told them happened, wasn't gonna happen. Cas was still thinking we should try to stop the other seals from breaking, but with no angelic backup on that one it was pretty much impossible- Cause we had no idea which seals were gonna break, or when. So he said he was gonna start zapping around and keeping a look out for any suspicious activity, and if he came across something he'd let us know.

So, for the moment we were just gonna go back to normal old hunting jobs. Ghosts, vamps, things like that. I was looking forward to it actually, since I had come back I hadn't been involved in any jobs except for one. I was eager to prove myself to Dad and Sam, to show them that I wasn't some stupid kid from the future, and that I could pull my own weight. But of course things like that was too much to ask for I guess. Either that or I always managed to jinx myself.


	8. Chapter 8

This place was creepy as hell, and I don't scare easily. But there was somethin about a run down old amusement park... Yeah, just use your imagination. Abandoned rusty rides, overgrown weeds and trees, litter blowing in the wind- It reminded me post apocalyptic movies I'd seen as a kid during movie and pizza nights with Dad and Sammy.

We had been exploring the massive place for the better part of two hours and hadn't come across anything strange. No ghosts anyway, but there was still an icky vibe to this place. Dad always used to say I had almost a sixth sense about these kinds of things. It seemed I could always tell when or if somethin was gonna go wrong. And my rolling stomach and goose bump littered skin was telling me it was gonna be that way this time around. Of course, I couldn't exactly tell Dad that now. Because he'd just think it was weird that I could sense those kinda things. Instead I stuck close to him, ready with my salt filled shot gun just in case anything might pop out at us.

After passing the Ferris wheel for the fifth time, Dad stopped and stared up at the slowly darkening sky.

"I don't know about you, but I say we stick it out for another hour or so and then come back tomorrow." He said.

Sam shifted on his feet, anxiously watching an old newspaper flutter through the breeze as if it were a monster content with ripping his throat out.

"Yeah... Good idea." He replied.

"Don't worry, Sammy-" Dad sneered and I knew what was comin. "We'll get outa here before creepy killer ghost clown comes out."

Sam sighed with an eye roll. "Seriously, Dean- Just stop with that crap. I'm gonna check out the bumper cars, you guys should try the haunted house."

"Yeah that's where the clown hanged himself, right?" I said. "You sure you don't wanna come with us on that one, Sam?"

He bitch faced at me. "Not you too, Mary. I gotta have someone to back me up."

I smiled and Dad gave a sarcastic "Ha ha" before Sam stomped away and disappeared past the busted concession stands.

"Ok, haunted house it is." Dad said, nudging me and starting off ahead.

This place was huge, as I'd thought before, but the haunted house was pretty evident since it was positioned on a slight hill and was the exact replica to the house on Psycho. From what we'd read before actually coming here, the house wasn't just built for the park. In fact it was here long before the park was, and had been built in the early 20's. A family lived there until the late 70's when the property was purchased during an auction and the entire farmstead surrounding was transformed into the amusement park. After that is when the house was used as some generic haunted house with plastic skeletons, vampire mannequins and fake cobwebs.

Dad started up the hill as the house seemed to grow and grow until it reminded me of a monster waiting to swallow us up. The windows had been boarded up by now, the door as well had two by fours stretched across to deter anyone from entering. But, seeing is that a couple had been pried loose and the door was hanging open, obviously that hadn't of worked.

"So, all the bodies were found by the Ferris wheel?" I asked, as Dad ducked under the boards and stepped in the house.

"Yeah, all gutted." He stopped once we entered the foyer and he held up his hand to halt me. "This place is in pretty bad shape, Mary. Stay behind me and follow my footsteps, just in case the floors give out." I didn't respond cause I was too entranced at lookin at all the creepy. "Hey, did you hear me?"

"Yeah," I snapped out of it. "I hear."

He was right, everything was in bad shape. The walls were pretty much peeling away, the floorboards were wobbly and creaky, there was even some holes in the floor that went clear down to the basement. There was still a few little things left behind from when the place had been used as a haunted house, like a white sheet with black painted on eyes meant to be a ghost, a rocking chair with a mannequin sitting in it near the window, that was covered in dust, cobwebs and rat crap- And a few jars sitting on the mantle that had what looked like severed hands and heads bobbing in clear blue liquid.

"What the..." Dad said, grabbing a jar with a hand in it. "Uh, this looks real."

I rushed over and took a peak. "Oh, gross... What the hell... Why would there be real body parts?"

"Good question," He laid it back on the mantle. "Unless our monster in question likes to keep souvenirs."

"Do ghosts actually do that?"

"Yeah," He grumbled as he moved away from the mantle. "Sammy and me were at a house once where a ghost kept whole bodies locked in a room. Tried to have birthday parties with em."

"Nasty." I shuddered. "But did reports say that some of the victims had pieces missing?"

"No, don't think so. That might mean there's more vic's than we thought. Ones that weren't found."

Gross. So that meant we might come across some rotting corpses... Yummy. Sure I was kinda used to this job by now, but sometimes there were still things that grossed me out. Smells mainly, you can never get used to the smell of decomposing bodies no matter how many you find during a job.

Dad started through the rest of the house, eventually coming to the stairs that led to the second and third floors. He tested them out before climbing, making sure they would hold our weight, and ended up sticking to the sides instead of the middle, and barked for me to do the same. We started up slowly, listening to the old wood groan in response to our weight, and after passing a landing that curved and led to more stairs, Dad stopped at the top and we stared down a dark hallway.

It was completely empty by now, there wasn't anything left of the haunted decor, but the walls had been spray painted with graffiti.

"Clown hanged himself in the last room on the left." Dad said, pointing to the door at the end of the hall. "Guess we should check that out."

He pulled the EMF reader from his jacket and flipped it on, and for the moment it was silent. After moving down the hallway halfway, he turned and gave me a quick glance from over his shoulder.

"So, you never said what else happens." He said.

"What?" I tore my attention off the cracked ceilings.

"In the future. After the whole Lucifer thing went down, what happened in the years after that?"

"Uh..." I stepped over a chunk of busted plaster. "I dunno, a lot of things happened. Some that you didn't wanna talk about really, but I know that Lucifer wasn't the only problem you guys had."

"What's that mean? Who else was giving us trouble?"

"I dunno- Like I said you didn't wanna talk about a lot of it. You told me that everything was pretty much crap until I was born. It took you guys that long to settle everything down. Not sure exactly what it was, but I know it had something to do with the angels."

"Cas?"

"No," I shook my head, but he didn't see it. "Just the rest of em. Cas was always there helpin you guys out, and after I was old enough to know what was what, he was always there still. He'd help you out on jobs, or if you and Sammy had to take off and didn't want me tagging along, he'd stay behind and keep an eye on me."

"So," He cleared his throat awkwardly. "How'd he go from bein your babysitter to being your boyfriend?"

My pace slowed to a stop as I stared at the back of his head in confusion. "Uh... How'd you know about that? I never told you?"

He stopped now and turned towards me. For a moment he looked at a loss for words before shrugging it off. "Kinda hard to miss the way you look at the guy. It didn't take long to add things up I guess. I took a shot, apparently I was right."

Uh... I didn't think I looked at this Cas at all in the way I looked at _my_ Cas in the future, but... Maybe I just didn't even notice.

"Oh..." I felt my cheeks flush red. "Well it's a little more complicated than that. It's not like I grew up and suddenly decided he was gonna be my boyfriend, which for the record, makes us sound like kids- I don't like using that word."

He chuckled. "Yeah ok ok. So, how'd it happen?"

"Actually... It was kinda your doing."

"Mine? What the hell? I'm pimpin my daughter out to angels?"

My eyes rolled. "No, dumb ass. It's not like that... I dunno, it's hard to explain, really. You knew you were gettin older and wouldn't be around much longer, you asked Cas to take care of me."

"And he took it as permission to screw you?"

"No, ugh- You always turn shit into porn." Seriously, somethings never change. "Cas isn't some pervert guy. He takes things seriously, likes to think that fate or whatever has a hand in certain events. I guess he considered me to be mixed in with that. He always said that there was something different about me, something that drew him in."

"Ok, gross... This is creepin me out." He whined.

"Hey, you asked. Next time... Don't."

He grumbled under his breath as we entered the last door in the hallway. The room was completely stripped down to the studs in the walls, the floorboards ripped up and tossed around leaving nothing but the beams and gaping holes showing the room beneath.

"Wow ok," Dad said. "Someone did a hell of a number on this room."

"Crazy killer ghost clown?" I joked.

"Nah, this looks like stupid kids work." He balanced himself on the beams. "Just... Stay there, you don't need to follow me."

Naturally I didn't listen, because I could balance on a beam just as good as the next person, so I followed him inside as he held out the EMF and waited for a buzz. After he moved across to another beam I continued on ahead.

"Nothin," He sighed. "I don't think this house has anything to do..."

His words cut off when the floor under my feet gave way and I fell through with screech and crash. It felt like I fell for an eternity before hitting the floor below with a crunch.

"Mary!" Dad shouted, peering down the hole in the ceiling above me.

I tried to shout something back, but the pain in my legs and ribs prevented it. I could only stare at the shower of dust and splinters around me, before I heard Dads footsteps pounding down the stairs and rounding the doorway. I realized that I had fallen into the remnants of the kitchen, landing on what was left of the table which was now broken into pieces under me.

He rushed over and knelt down, immediately noticing my busted up leg.

"Hey, hey," He said, shaking my shoulder. "Don't move, ok? Looks like your leg is broken."

I wasn't planning on moving, in fact I could barely breathe- And after I started coughing, splattering a mouthful of blood on the floor Dad started to panic. He gently rolled me over to my back and I could barely see through the darkness that his face went ashen.

"Shit..." He ran his hand down his face. "Ok, no time to find a hospital. Cas? Cas if you can hear me get your ass here quick. Mary's hurt."

He tore off his jacket and wadded it up, pressing it against my ribs which I only just then noticed had been punctured by a piece of wood.

"Just hold on, kid-" He said. "Cas? What the hell, man? Where are you?!"

I had started to black out by the time Cas whooshed onto the scene, taking only a half a second to notice what had happened before he rushed over and knelt on the opposite side of me. I was familiar with this process and wasn't surprised when he reached up with his hand and cupped the side of my face and I felt my wounds close over. Feeling my bones snap back into place wasn't a pleasant experience, and I couldn't stop myself from groaning in pain before it finally stopped.

"What happened?" Cas asked, now that I wasn't laying on the floor dying.

"An accident," I grunted, as Dad helped me to my feet. "I fell through the fucking ceiling."

Even though I was healed now Dad grabbed my chin and examined me. "We're leaving. I'm callin Sam and we're gettin the hell outa here."

"Dude, I'm fine." I replied. "It was just an accident."

"We're leaving." He snapped back, his tone even more gruff than usual. I knew that tone and it always meant not to argue, so I said nothing as he stomped from the kitchen and the house entirely.

Cas followed us as we entered the park again, and after a quick call to Sam, we met up at the gated entrance.

"What happened?" He asked, once he noticed the look on Dad's face and the left over blood splatter on my shirt.

"Mary got hurt, but Cas took care of it." Dad answered, squeezing through the fence first. "But we're leavin."

Sam eyed me up and down before holding the fence open for me and I slipped out next.

The ride back to the motel was awkward and uncomfortable. Dad's grip was so tight on the steering wheel his knuckles were white, and his expression wasn't much better. He looked pissed, which of course confused me. Why would he be pissed? It was just a stupid accident, it's not like I got bitch smacked by a ticked off ghost or somethin. It coulda happened to any one of us, I was just the one that happened to be the unlucky asshole that stepped on the board first. But yeah, he was mega pissed, and he didn't seem to care that he was speeding through stop signs and red lights before the car screeched to a stop in the motel parking lot. He barely cut the engine before yanking his keys out and storming into the motel room, while Sammy and me only gaped at each other in confusion. Cas too, who had stuck around after healing me, didn't seem to know what to make of his outburst.

"What's with him?" Sam asked.

"I dunno." I answered, sighing. "Maybe you should talk to him?"

But normally when Dad got into one of these moods it was better to just let him get over it. He never wanted to talk things out, and would end up snappin at you or makin some sort of smart ass comment about no chick flick moments.

So for the rest of the day we watched from the sidelines while Dad ignored us as he chugged at his beer or flicked through the tv stations. After dinner came and went Sam finally broke the silence.

"Dean... Are we gonna finish this job?"

Dad turned the tv off before pulling himself off the bed. "Tomorrow, yeah. We'll go figure it out, Mary's staying here."

"Uh... Why?" I replied. "It's not like I'm gonna be fallin through anymore floors?"

"I don't care. If Cas hadn't of showed up and healed you then you coulda died. So, you're not goin."

Ok so he was mad at me now? What the hell? He must have been, because he refused to look at or even acknowledge me the rest of the evening. Sammy and me offered to go grab dinner, and he actually turned down a burger and pie, so I knew something was really wrong. He snapped at Cas and Sam when they'd actually try to talk to him, and the only thing he seemed interested in doing was drinking his beer and staring at the tv. This lasted until Sam decided to just go to bed, and Cas zapped away to continue on with whatever the fuck he'd been doing. Dad finally had enough of the tv a little after midnight, and noticed that I was still awake as I sat at the table and stared out the window.

"You should go to bed." He said. "You kinda had a rough day."

"I'm fine," I spat back. "Cas healed me, remember? I'm cool."

He mumbled something under his breath as he sat down across from me. "What's stuck up your ass?"

I scowled at him. "Gee, I dunno, maybe it's because you're tryin to keep me locked in the motel room instead of helping you guys out on the job? And yeah you might think that since you're my Dad that I gotta do what you say, but that's not really how things went down in the future."

"Well in case you haven't noticed, kid- This ain't the future. I'm not the same old man you had then, so- You just gotta deal with how I do things." He didn't let me snap back at him. "Truth is, is that I always thought that if I ended up havin a kid- That'd be it. I figured that I'd have the sense to not raise it the way my Dad raised me and Sammy. But apparently I didn't do that. I don't care if you claim you went to the same school, had friends or whatever, I fucked up when I let you in on what goes on out there in the real world. The first time I gave you a gun, I fucked up. Hell, I wouldn't even let you grow out your own damn hair, what the hell is that about?"

"Safety?" I replied. "You made sure I knew how to protect myself."

"No, it was stupid, so I figure that if you're gonna be here now then maybe I can make up for all that. Yeah, you're an adult I get that, and maybe our situation is a little weird, but I'd like to think that I could have some kind of positive influence on you."

This was more than confusing. I would be lying if I said I wasn't skeptical. Dad hadn't made it very easy to be here, I knew he didn't like me much.

"Um." I sat up. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, but... Don't."

"What?" His brows squished together.

"I'm not stupid. I know you don't like havin me around, I know you don't like me much. But you don't gotta lie and make it out like you care when you really don't just to spare my feelings. I'm a big girl, I know how things work. You're not the same Dad I had in the future, so I can't expect for you to act like it. So, let's just agree to work together without taring each others heads off, you do your thing, I'll do mine. You don't gotta bend over backwards trying to act like something you're not, and I won't expect you to suddenly morph into the Dad I had in the future, ok?"

He blinked a few times over before snickering. But... It didn't sound like an amused snicker, exactly- It sounded like he was tryin to cover over something else.

"Yeah, ok." He shrugged. "If you say so. But, that don't mean that I'm gonna let out run into situations that're dangerous. Adult or not, I'm still the oldest in our little trio, so what I say goes."

I only grumbled, before finally deciding to spare myself anymore pain by sitting with a Dad that friggin hated me, and laid down to sleep.

* * *

Sam smacked Dean on the back of the head, jolting him awake with a snort. For a moment he only laid there with the side of his face smashed into the pillow before groggily looking up at his brother.

"Sammy, what the hell?" He grumbled.

"You're forgetting about the stupid amusement park, Dean. I wanna take care of it and get out of town, I came across another case that's more important than this one."

Dean sat up, wiping his face with his hand before wobbly moving his attention to the second bed in the room. Mary was still out like a light.

"Yeah, ok-" He pulled himself to sitting position. "What kinda case is it?"

"We won't know until we get there," Sam answered. "I just know that it's a weird one."

"More weird than killer ghost clown?" Dean sneered.

"Shut up, let's just go already before Mary wakes up."

"Yeah yeah yeah. Do I at least got time to take a piss first?"

"No," Sam threw his jacket at him, hitting him roughly in the face. "Let's go."

Dean pulled himself off the bed, and thankfully hadn't taken his boots off the night before so it didn't take a few seconds for him to be ready. All he had to do was throw on his jacket and grab his keys and they were out the door, making sure to lock it behind them.

Once they were in the impala Dean tried to force himself awake by flicking on the radio and blasting it to the point his eardrums rattled. Sam only cringed for several long minutes before reaching over and switching it off.

"Dude," Dean grumbled. "I was listenin to that."

"We need to talk." Was Sam's reply.

"Oh, great. What the hell is it this time? Are we gonna have another chick flick moment, Sammy? Cause I gotta tell ya, I'm really not in the mood." Sam bitched faced at him to the point that Dean frowned. "What?"

"I heard your conversation last night with Mary." He said. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What're you goin on about now?" Dean sighed.

"You, are you trying to make the kid run off again, huh? Is that what you want? Because if you keep acting like you don't give a crap about her then that's exactly what she's gonna do, Dean!"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Look, I can't fake somethin that's not there, ok?"

"Whatever, Dean. You know, you try to fake like you don't give a crap but you're not fooling anyone... Well, maybe Mary- But you're not fooling me."

"I don't know what you're talkin about."

"Oh really?" His bitch face intensified. "So, you're saying that you _didn't _lie to Mary when you said you lost her picture? And it's not stuffed in your wallet right now?"

Dean snapped his head towards his brother. "Dude, what the hell? Are you goin through my stuff again?"

Sam's forehead wrinkled as his brows squeezed together. "Dean, what exactly are you trying to do? I know you care, if you didn't then you wouldn't have the picture in your wallet, and you wouldn't have freaked out so much yesterday after she got hurt, so... What's going on?"

Dean tried to shirk off the conversation by chuckling, his eyes wandering back to the road ahead. "Just stay outa it, Sammy."

"Why?"

"Because it ain't any of your business that's why!"

"I think it is. She's my niece, and she's here now, and someone's gotta have her back since apparently you're too busy being a dick." He shrugged. "I don't get it. You care and yet you're still being hard on the kid... Why?"

"It's not that I'm being hard on her, I'm just trying to watch out for her, that's all."

Sam nodded. "Ok, and there's nothing wrong with that. But... Why are you being so cold towards her? Why are you acting like you don't care? Why didn't you set her straight last night when she pretty much called you out? She was pretty much asking without _actually _asking, if you hate her and you let her believe you do."

Dean's lips pursed tightly together and Sam could see the muscles in his jaw twitching.

"I don't want her to get her hopes up, I guess. I don't want her to think that everything's peachy when somethin could go wrong any second. I don't want her to get too attached to me just in case I get my ass killed or something." He answered. "Look at what she did when I died as an old man. She had Cas send her back here because she didn't wanna be alone. And yeah, here we are now with demons and dick monkey angels up our asses and I very well could get ganked all over again."

Sam shook his head, turning his attention out the passenger side window. "Yeah, and you think that you being a cold bastard is gonna make it hurt any less if something happened to you? You're an idiot."

"I didn't ask for your opinion. She's not your kid, she's mine."

Sam snickered. "Well, that's a start I guess. At least you're admitting out loud that she's actually your kid."

"I never..." Dean let out a long drawn out sigh. "I never said she wasn't my kid. And yeah like I said this isn't any of your business so just stay outa it."

"Ok, fine-" Sam snapped back. "I won't say anything anymore. You just keep being an asshole, keep being cold like _our _Dad was and we'll see how long it takes until Mary can't stand you, and you'll have alienated a daughter that really loves you- And ruined what could've been a really good relationship."

Dean's fingers tapped on the steering wheel. "I'm trying, Sammy. I'm still adjusting. It woulda been different if she was actually a kid and not an adult. But, I'm trying _not_ to be Dad. I don't want her to feel like she doesn't have any choices or that I'm forcing her to be a hunter or something."

"Yeah, but... In your attempts to protect her and not being Dad, you're ignoring what she actually wants. Maybe it is crappy that she chose to be a hunter- But, Dean, _she chose_ it which means you can't really stop her from doing it. Instead, why don't you just focus on making sure that she knows what she's doing. Show her the ropes, make sure she's not rusty. Maybe you could bond with her over that?"

Dean fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat, and from the topic of conversation. "Bond with her?" He snorted. "Yeah, cause I'm so friggin good at _bonding_."

"Drop the macho crap for once, Dean-" Sam snapped back. "At least with your kid. You like her and you know it. I see the look on your face whenever she bites your head off or back sasses you. You're proud that you have a kid that's so much like you. Admit it."

"Shut up." Dean pouted. "I'm done with this conversation."

Sam only smiled before falling silent, feeling that he had made his point entirely.


	9. Chapter 9

When I woke up and found Dad and Sam gone, naturally I was pissed. And, for a fleeting second I wondered if maybe they just up and left me entirely- Until I saw their bags were still laying on the floor. So, that meant they went to finish the job without me. Sure, I could steal a car or hitch a ride to the amusement park to help em out, but I knew how that would end. Dad would blow a frickin gasket and tare me a massive sized new one. As much as I hated it, I knew that I had no other choice but to stay at the motel and hope that everything ended up ok.

After a couple hours and they hadn't come back, I started to pace- After another hour went by and they refused to answer their phones, and hadn't responded to my voice mails, I was in full blown panic mode. I was seriously contemplating hitching that ride when I heard the flapping of wings and Cas said gruffly, "Hello, Mary."

I spun around and let out a huff. "Hey... Long shot, but... Have you seen Dad and Sam?"

He nodded. "I have, and they asked me to come and let you know that they're fine."

"Oh really?" I crossed my arms. "And why couldn't they just call and tell me that themselves, huh?"

"They're currently indisposed- What with attempting to kill the monster in question."

"Monster? So it's not a ghost?"

He shook his head. "No, it's something else."

"And I take it you're not gonna tell me what?"

"No, Dean asked me not to. I assume he believed that once you learned what it was, you'd be even more insistent on going to help."

Awesome- So that meant Dad stuck the angel on me to keep me from running off. Typical. I can't count the times he'd done the exact same thing in the future. And you know what always happened when he pulled that shit? Someone ended up getting hurt. But I knew that I couldn't sneak my way past Cas. I'd tried that so many times, and each time ended with me being knocked flat on my butt, waking up hours later to Cas sitting silently and glowering at me. And forget actually asking him to take me there, I knew how that'd go too. He'd refuse and still knock me out just to not hear my bitching anymore. Yeah Cas and me might have had a thing in the future but that didn't mean he would tolerate my crap. It was easier just to push his fingertips on my forehead and put me to sleep.

Sure, it might be easy to use my knowledge of future Cas to my advantage. I knew his weaknesses, I knew what made him break down and turn soft. But... That wouldn't have been fair. I knew everything about him and he knew absolutely nothing about me. So, instead of being a bitch and pulling crap like that, I opted for keeping my trap shut and sitting down at the table.

Who knows, maybe I shoulda used that strategy, maybe I could've done something before they got hurt.

Another two hours later Cas and I had been sitting in silence, which was awkward. I think I scared the guy, or made him nervous- I couldn't tell. All I knew was that he refused to look at me for the most part, keeping his eyes planted firmly on his feet. And yeah I guess it would have been awkward for him. There he was, an angel of the frickin lord, and he was sitting with some strange chick that banged him in the future? Yeah, it'd be weird, especially since, like I said, he was an angel and this wasn't exactly something he was accustomed to.

But anyhow, two more hours flew by before Cas suddenly furrowed his brows, cocking his head to the side as though he was listening to something in the distance. Afterwards he stood and stomped over to me, grabbing me by the arm and yanking me to my feet.

"Let's go. Something's wrong." He said.

"What do you mean something's wrong?"

He didn't answer and instead zapped us away from the motel room and into a hallway of what was clearly a hospital. Instantly my heart fell to my stomach when Sam stepped out of a room with a bloody gash on his forehead.

"Get in there." He said, pointing to Cas. "Do something."

"W-What happened?" I stuttered, already the tears were coming.

Cas said nothing and instead entered the room, and before the door slammed closed I could see Dad laying in a bed hooked up to more machines and breathing tubes. Even with just a short glance I could see him bloodied and bruised, his chest and abdomen was completely wrapped in blood soaked bandages.

After Cas stepped inside and the door slammed in my face I completely lost it.

"Oh my god... What happened?!" I shrieked, diving at the door but Sam caught me around the waist.

"Calm down, Mary. Everything's gonna be fine. Cas'll take care of him." He replied.

There would be no consoling me now and I fought against him, but his grip was too strong.

"What happened?!" I repeated.

"Hey, hey," He swung me around to face him, and he kept his hands on my shoulders. "He'll be ok. Cas is gonna heal him, so there's no reason to freak out like this."

That was the only reason why I wasn't pounding Sam's face in for holding me back. And all in all Cas was only in there a couple minutes before the door creaked open and he returned to the hallway. I glanced inside the room again, and Dad looked healed for the most part- And apparently Cas had removed the breathing tubes from him, either that or he ripped them out himself, because he was sitting up slightly and staring at the ceiling looking just as pissed as usual.

"He wants to speak with you Sam." Cas said, then barely passed a glance at me. "Alone."

Sam nodded and after patting my shoulder entered the room, leaving Cas and I alone in the hallway.

Since Sam refused to tell me what the fuck happened I decided to grill Cas.

"What happened?"

"An accident, according to Dean." He answered.

"An accident?" I huffed. "That didn't look like an accident. That looked like he'd just got run through a frickin wood chipper."

"They underestimated the creature they were hunting I gathered. Just the two of them wasn't enough to kill it."

"What the hell was it?"

"A ghoul, or... Two ghouls, I'm not certain exactly. They didn't tell me much."

Ghouls? They were dealing with frickin ghouls? I had never hunted them before, but I knew enough about the creepy fuckers that told me they usually ate dead bodies, not live bodies... Although they did have tendency to munch down on actual living people.

I stared down at the floor, feeling my eyes well with tears. It seemed like since I got here that nothing good had happened- The only thing I knew for sure was that Dad had been hurt twice now, almost fatally. Maybe my Cas was right, maybe me telling them all these secrets about the future really would end up making things worse? Maybe I had completely fucked up the timeline to the point that all of these horrible things would just keep happening to Dad? And what's worse is that I couldn't just zap back to my own time and think everything would be back to normal. I had already been here, I'd already fucked it up... There would be no changing that now.

"Uh..." Cas fumbled, once he noticed me crying. "He's going to be fine, Mary. I healed him. He's fine now."

But that didn't make me feel any better, not with knowing that these horrible things might just keep on happening. So I just stood there, sobbing into my hands while Cas shifted on his feet uncomfortably, not knowing what to say or do. He probably would have rather zapped himself away just to avoid the awkward situation, but instead he warily moved closer, still shifting uncomfortably, before reaching up and pulling me into a hug.

He was completely stiff as he held me, before easing up only slightly and patting my back. It wasn't like me to cry so openly, but Dad was my one weakness, the only thing that I would break down for and bawl like a baby over. Yeah, even _this _Dad, the one that didn't like me- The one that probably considered me a burden or a pain in his ass rather than his daughter.

"Uh..." He still didn't know what to say. "Everything will be fine, Mary."

Yeah chances were this was the first time in his long lifetime that he'd ever had to deal with a crying and sniveling girl. Little did he know that he had done that very thing dozens of times in the future, so many times actually that I couldn't even count all of the moments. Of course, he was much better at it then, but at least he was trying right now.

I pulled away and wiped my face, trying to force off a fake smile. "Sorry," I sniffled. "I kinda lost my cool I guess."

He nodded, averting his eyes to the floor. "I understand."

But he didn't really, because I didn't tell him the entire reason why I was crying. This was my fault. I knew it was, it was my fault that my Dad nearly got himself killed... Twice... I had ruined everything, had made things a million times worse, and now there was nothing I could do about it.

* * *

Dad refused to talk about what happened with the supposed ghouls, no matter how much I'd question him about it. He kept telling me that it was nothing to worry about, that it was over and done with, and there was no sense bitching about it. Yeah of course that was easy for him to say, he wasn't the one that sitting there everyday blaming themselves for fucking things up and nearly getting him killed. Since he wouldn't talk to me about it, I decided to just give it up with the questions.

We started off for what Sam said was some weird job, which details I wasn't let in on. So I couldn't prep myself for whatever was gonna happen. Which meant that when we got into town and they pulled to a stop in front of what looked like a used comics store, I didn't know what was going on. They had changed into their cheap suits, grabbing their F.E.D badges and with no more explanation other than telling me to go inside and pretend to be a customer, we got started.

I walked in, dressed in my usual clothes and started sifting through discount bins of comic books before Dad and Sam walked in next. Ya know, if they were intentionally leaving me out of jobs then they could have at least had the decency to tell me- That way I wouldn't end up makin an ass out of myself later on. But I guess this time it kind of made sense. Whether I liked to admit it or not I looked too young to be a F.E.D, so best case scenario would be for me to pretend to be a customer and maybe sniff around for something strange. Of course, that mighta been easier had they told me what I would be looking for.

I only stopped sifting through the bin when I heard my Dad's tone shift. The dude behind the counter was rambling about some series of books, which he thought they were mimicking. Instantly I knew what he was talking about as I dropped the comic in my hand like a hot potato. So we were to this time now? Of course I knew about these books, Dad had bitched about them from the moment I was old enough to friggin read. And, of course when I actually read the Supernatural series, he bitched even more.

As I inched my way closer to the counter, I heard Sam say that they wanted every copy of Supernatural they had in stock. And before long they had bought the entire first series and we were zipping back to a motel.

A few hours later both Dad and Sam had skimmed over several of the books, looking completely flabbergasted that whoever had written them had been so damn accurate.

"Everything is in here," Dad bellowed. "Everything, even..." He paused, giving me a subtle glance before whispering. "Graphic sex scenes. I'm full frontal in here, dude."

I inwardly cringed, and pretended not to hear that before Sammy looked at me.

"Mary, did you know about these books?" He asked.

And, from here on out I vowed to myself that I was gonna keep my mouth shut about anything else I knew. Just in case it really was my fault that things had gone so wrong, I wasn't gonna take the chance of something else happening.

"No," I lied, shaking my head. "Believe me I'm just as surprised as you guys."

Dad gave me his "You're lying" face, but didn't call me out on it. "Ok, well we gotta find this Carver Edlund. Find out how in the hell he knows literally _everything _about our lives."

"Yeah that's not gonna be so easy," Sam replied. "Carver Edlund is a pen name, which means we have no idea who the guy is."

"Awesome," Dad tossed his most recent book to the bed. "Any ideas on how to track him down?"

"Maybe the publisher?" I suggested.

Ok yeah I said I wasn't gonna spill anymore info about the future, but that didn't mean I couldn't nudge them in the right direction every now and then.

Sam arched his brows. "Yeah, that's what I was thinking. It's in town, a little place that went bankrupt a few years back. The woman in charge still lives here, so..."

Dad jumped up from the bed and grabbed his jacket. "Let's go. We're gonna track down this yahoo."

Sam and I followed him from the motel, and before long we were pulling to a stop in front of a small house. The woman inside was pretty easily influenced into talking to us once we told her we were reporters that wanted to write an article on the Supernatural series.

I'd come across a few fan girls in my time, after all the biggest one was the one to introduce me to the books in the first place. Aunt Charlie was kinda crazy every now and then, and I think the main reason she wanted me to read them so badly was just to tick Dad off. She got a big laugh out of it of course, and Dad basically cussed her out while she continued to make fun of him. So yeah, the woman that published these books was as big a fan girl as any I'd ever seen. Sure, I liked the books too, considering it was my Dad and uncle that were the main characters, but since I knew everything that happened in them was real, well... It kinda made them hard to read.

I had only read the first half of the series, up until Dad went to hell- After that whenever I'd mention reading the others Dad would bite my head off and forbid it. He figured that since he'd told me the stories himself that I didn't need to read the gory details. I let him have his way with that one, cause yeah I wasn't much for the gory details myself. But I knew that there was tons of things he'd neglected to tell me. I figured it was probably some pretty horrible shit, and honestly- I didn't wanna know at the time and Dad was never comfortable talking about it anyway. Now that I was back in the year 2009 though, I kinda wished I'd pressured him into telling me. Just in case.

"So, we were wondering if you could tell us Carver Edlunds real name?" Sam asked, flashing his puppy dog eyes to the max.

The woman leaned back in her chair at the desk. "Oh, I'm sorry I can't do that. He's very private."

"We wanted to get his take on the Supernatural series, for our article-" Dad went on. "Since he's such a great and imaginative author, we were hoping that we could put the series in the spotlight."

I rolled my eyes at Dad, stifling back a laugh. Since putting the series in the spotlight meant "pounding the authors face in until he squealed", I don't think the lady would have been as eager to divulge the info.

It took us actually having to answer a slew of questions about the books, finishing off with flashing our anti possession tattoos for the woman to finally take us as serious fans.

Yes, yes- I already knew the name of the author. Chuck Shirley, but like I said before, I was keeping my mouth shut from here on out. So when she finally gave us the name, I faked surprise just like Dad and Sammy, before we left the house and started off across town.

Dad actually didn't tell me much about Chuck. Only that he was a prophet and had written down their stories for what Cas claimed would eventually be known as "The Winchester Gospel". So I was gonna be just as alarmed at meeting the guy as they might've been. Especially since I didn't know whether or not the man woulda "foreseen" me coming back to this time or not. Considering he was a prophet or whatever, I figured he would have.

When we pulled to a stop in front of his house, the first thing I thought was that his yard could really stand a good trimming. The place looked pretty much abandoned, and it was kinda hard for me to believe that a prophet of the lord lived in such a hovel.

I kept my mouth shut as I followed Dad and Sam up the stairs and Dad rang the doorbell. Thirty seconds passed before the door creaked open and a short guy with a beard and dark circles under his eyes peered out at us.

"Can I help you?" He asked, closing his robe once he saw me.

"Are you Chuck Shirley?" Dad asked.

"Uh, yeah?" He replied.

"The Chuck Shirley who wrote the Supernatural books?" Sam went on.

He shifted his eyes to each of us, eventually settling them on me. I wanted to say he looked confused at the site of me- But why would he have been? He had never met us before, met me...

"I might be," He finally answered. "Why? Who's asking?"

I glanced up at Dad in time to see him give a sarcastic smile, one that showed he wasn't at all happy.

"Well nice to meet you, Chuck. My names Dean and this is Sam. The Sam and Dean you've been writing about." He said.

The man didn't look at all impressed, in fact he looked as though he'd experienced something like this happening a million times. He only nodded, rolling his eyes as he slammed the door in our faces. Dad responded to that by ringing the doorbell a dozen times over before Chuck pulled the door open a second time.

"Look, this is funny, ha ha, yeah- This never gets old. And I'm flattered that you're fans of the books, but... I strongly suggest you get a life." Chuck said, starting to close the door again but was stopped when Dad stuck his foot in.

"We have a life," Dad said, forcing his way inside as Chuck stumbled backwards. "And you've been using them to write your damn books!"

Chuck continued to stumble backwards until he rounded an archway and into his living room, collapsing back onto the couch.

"Wait, wait a second!" He shouted. "I think I have some autographed posters somewhere in my closet if you want them. Please, take em... I-If you leave now I won't press charges!"

"We don't want any damn posters." Sam snapped back. "We wanna know how you're doing it!"

"Doing what? I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Yes you do!" Dad stomped forward as the guy slumped down on the couch. "How do you know about ghosts, or changelings, or vampires huh?"

"Because I made them up! They're not real, it's just a story!" Chuck was shaking by this point.

"Do you know about the angels? Or Lilith breaking the seals?"

Chuck suddenly went stiff. "Wait a second... How did you know about that? I never... I never published those stories?"

"You kept writing?" I said, figuring that I'd need to jump in on this sometime or else it might seem suspicious.

"Well, yeah- Even after the publisher went bankrupt, but like I said those were never published. No one's ever even read them, I haven't told anyone I was writing them... How did you know?"

Dad finally stood up straight. "Well like we said, I'm Dean Winchester and this is my brother Sam."

Chucks brows rose. "I... I never mentioned the last name. I never told anyone that either."

"So, I guess you pretty much have to believe us then, right?" Sam sighed, crossing his arms.

"No, no way. This has gotta be a drunken hallucination. Yeah, that's it. Clearly I'm drunk and you three are just a figment of my imagination." Chuck shook his head, jumping up from the couch and rounding his desk and drinking a shot of something.

He refused to turn back facing us, and continued downing shots and the entire time we only stood there silently watching them. When he finally did turn he practically dropped his bottle of Jack.

"Oh god, you're still here... You're not a hallucination." He rubbed his head.

"Sorry," Dad said, leaning against the wall. "But we're live and in the flesh."

"I... I'm finding all of this very hard to believe. I mean, if it's true- Look at what I put you guys through. I killed your Mom," He pointed to Dad. "I sent you to hell, my god... What kind of monster am I? I create books and they come to life? I'm pure evil."

Sam rolled his eyes. "You're not a monster and you're not putting us through anything. We think you might just be psychic or something."

"Psychic? If that were true you think I'd be living in this dump? No, clearly I'm a god." Chuck's face went flat after that statement.

"You're not a god," Dad grumbled, rubbing his temples. "Look, why don't you just tell us how you do it?"

"You mean my process?" Chuck replied.

"Yeah, whatever. Your process. How is it you can see every friggin thing about our lives?"

He shrugged, pacing back and forth behind his desk. "Well, it starts with headaches. Horrible, terrible headaches that no pain medication can fix. So, I usually just drink until I pass out, and then it just... Flows... Just as clearly as if I were witnessing it first hand. The first time it happened it stuck with me for days afterwards, it wouldn't go away... I guess that's when I first started writing."

"And you never thought it was weird?" I asked. "That you were having such vivid flashes or something?"

He shrugged. "I guess I never really thought about it, wait... Who are you?"

Dad pushed away from the wall. "Wait a second. You haven't had any flashes with her in it?"

"No," Chuck eyeballed me. "At least... Not yet. Who is she?"

Ok this was weird. You'd think that if I zapped back in time and interrupted my Dad and uncles lives that would be something a prophet would've seen. Something was clearly wrong with this.

"Forget it." Dad replied. "If you're not seein her in any of your flashes then we'll just leave it at that."

Chuck looked curious naturally, since Dad was basically sayin it was none of his business. But I was only standing there trying to understand how he hadn't seen anything about me? If he knew about the angels, about Lilith breaking the seals, then how hadn't he seen something as big as the daughter of Dean Winchester zapping back in time? I mean, I came back here and already had started changing things. Sam had stopped drinking demon blood, stopped teaming up with Ruby. He knew the truth about Lilith being the final seal and what would happen if he killed her. You'd think that'd warrant a flash or two for the friggin prophet.

"Oh, holy crap." Chuck suddenly said, rubbing his face. "I uh... Well, here..."

He reached to his desk and grabbed a few pieces of paper and shoved them in Dads hands. Dad only grumbled before reading over a few paragraphs as his face went blank.

"Wait a second. You saw this happening?" He asked.

"Y-Yeah," He stuttered. "I saw that I was confronted by my characters."

"And you still never saw me?" I questioned. Seriously, how was this possible?

"No, you weren't in the dream... Really, who are you?"

"Apparently no one important." I smiled.

I kinda drifted off in my own head after that point. To me this was further confirmation that I'd messed things up somehow. Because what little I did listen to the conversation, apparently Chuck seemed to think this whole apocalypse thing was still happening. The flashes he got told him that- Which of course didn't make sense. Sam wasn't drinking demon blood anymore, he hadn't contacted Ruby in a hell of a long time now, he was clean. He knew what would happen if he killed Lilith, so... What the fuck was happening?

We stuck around Chucks for a little while after that, before Dad decided we were leaving. Since there wasn't a job in town we stopped off at a laundromat- And while Dad read through the pages Chuck had just recently written, Sam started in with washing his clothes.

"This is just weird." Dad said. "I'm sitting here reading about myself sitting in a laundromat reading about myself. I think I just had a small stroke."

"This doesn't make any sense," Sam replied. "Sure, we've known psychics before that were pretty damn accurate. Missouri and Pamela for one, but... This is just too much. How's this guy doing it?"

Dad looked at me, figuring I'd have an explanation and yeah sure I did- But I wasn't gonna tell him that.

"I dunno, man-" Dad sighed, once he realized I wasn't speaking. "But this actually ain't such a bad thing. We got a heads up to everything that's gonna happen."

"But," Sam counteracted. "According to everything we've read so far Chuck still thinks I'm gonna end up killing Lilith? Which obviously I'm not. So maybe that proves this guy isn't as good as we think?"

"Or maybe he knows somethin we don't." Dad shrugged.

Sam slammed the washer door closed. "What's that supposed to mean? You think that I'm gonna go all dark side again? Maybe drinking demon blood and go after Lilith?"

"Didn't say that, Sammy." Dad replied. "I'm just saying that Chuck's been pretty damn accurate so far- So maybe something goes wrong? Since we have a way of knowing what's gonna happen now," He waved the papers in the air. "We can avoid it."

"I thought we _were _avoiding it? We haven't done anything that even comes close to angels or demons, or seals breaking." Sam sat on top of the washer, kicking his feet against it. For a second he looked like a gigantic five year old. "If I know the truth now, that Lilith's the final seal and killing her means Lucifer getting out, then shouldn't that change the entire plot to Chuck's stupid books?"

"You'd think," Dad yet again looked at me. "Mary, you've been awfully quiet over there, what're you thinkin?"

I flinched slightly, then tried to play off my uneasiness with a shrug. "I dunno, just trying to figure out how he's doing it is all."

"You sure I never told you about this in the future?" He arched a brow, his expression stern. "Ever?"

Dammit, I couldn't lie to him. I sucked at it, he saw through it every damn time.

"Well... Maybe." I sighed, honestly what was the point in lying if he wouldn't fall for it?

He looked annoyed that I hadn't flat out told them that in the first place. "Ok, and? What's up with this guy?"

"I dunno."

"Don't lie." He nudged me with the back of his hand. "Tell us what you know."

"I really don't know much, that's the truth. You didn't talk about it much. You didn't like the books obviously and got pissed when I read them."

"Wait," He was taken aback. "You've already read them?"

"Well, yeah... The first series anyways. You wouldn't let me read the others."

"So how's he doing it?" Sam asked. "Is this guy dangerous?"

"No," I snorted out a laugh. "Definitely not dangerous."

"Why didn't you tell us this before?" Yeah Dad wasn't happy.

"Because I'm still not cool with telling you all this crap when Cas said it could be dangerous. I figured I'd let you guys find this out on your own."

Yet again Dad and Sam exchanged troubled glances, and after several long seconds of silence Sam cleared his throat.

"Look, uh... Mary, you should probably know that..."

"Hey," Dad stood suddenly, after grabbing the pages. "You heard what she said. She doesn't know much about the guy, which means we still gotta figure out how he's doing this. So, why don't we focus on that, huh?"

Sam immediately lowered his eyes to the floor, nodding slightly as he clammed up. Huh, yeah ok. That's not weird at all. Clearly he was gonna tell me something, and whatever it was Dad didn't want me to hear it.

The silence was interrupted by Dad's phone ringing. He practically ripped it from his jacket before answering.

"Yeah, hello?" He barked, then his brows arched. "Chuck? Yeah ok, we'll be there soon." After he hung up he motioned to the door. "Let's go, Chuck said he's had another vision."


	10. Chapter 10

I for one couldn't find any words in response to what Chuck just told us. Sam immediately went up on the defense, and Dad looked scared shitless.

"Wait a second," Sam snorted. "You can't be serious? Me and Lilith? Uh... That's not happening!"

Chuck scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "Well, um... That's what I saw, Sam. I don't know how to explain it."

"Me and Lilith? In bed? It's impossible, that would _never _happen!"

"Hold up, Sammy-" Dad said, flicking through the most recent pages Chuck had printed up. "It says here that she's gonna be in town... Do you know why, Chuck?"

"No, I have no idea. At least not yet, I haven't seen that far."

"This is crap, Dean!" Sam snapped. "Even if she was in town do you really think I'd," He paused and quoted what was written. "Be enveloped in the thralls of fiery demonic passion? Please. It's ridiculous!"

Chuck looked offended. "It's just a rough draft."

"I'm not..." Sam sighed, rolling his eyes. "I'm not talking about the writing, I'm talking about what you said I was gonna do. It's not happening."

"How could it anyway?" Dad added. "Lilith's a little girl?"

"Well, not anymore," Chuck said, holding up a page. "Now she's a comely dental hygienist from Bloomington Indiana."

"Whatever," Sam was ready to stomp out of the house entirely by this point. "It's not like you're right about this anyway, it's not happening."

"Yeah well, regardless of what you think's gonna happen," Dad said. "I think I speak for all of us when I say we're gettin the hell outa dodge."

He didn't wait around for Chuck to say much else and basically dragged Sam and I out of his house and back to the impala. He was making the quickest exit out of town, wanting to gain as much distance from us and Lilith as humanly possible.

"You know, maybe this isn't so bad?" Sam said, as he flicked through Chucks pages. "I mean, we've got a solid lead now, we know Lilith is gonna be in town. Maybe this would be the perfect opportunity to take her out before anymore seals are broken?"

I didn't get the chance to respond before Dad barked back. "Don't you remember what Cas said? He said there isn't a way to take the bitch out. The knife won't work, exorcising won't either, so what other way do you got, Sammy, cause I sure as hell don't know of one."

Sam sighed, laying the pages in his lap. "Yeah, I guess I forgot about that."

"If we had an angel blade, sure-" I said. "But we don't."

Dad looked at my reflection in the rear view mirror. "Even if we had that I still wouldn't wanna risk it. Like Cas said, we wouldn't be able to get close enough to use it."

"Maybe we could." Sam added. "All it would take is getting her stuck in a devils trap."

"Yeah cause that's so easy," Dad shook his head. "No, we're leaving."

"Think about it, Dean-" Sam argued. "When are we ever gonna have the chance to try this again? We won't. For once we have a solid and concrete lead to where Lilith is gonna be and you just wanna run away instead of fight?"

I sighed and slumped down in my seat, pulling my hoodie over my head- I wished I had some headphones right about now so I could block out what was gonna be an argument.

"It's not running," Dad retorted. "It's being smart. We stay in this town, Lilith is gonna pound all our asses. This is the kinda reckless thinking that you do that always backfires in the end and gets you in trouble, Sam. If we had known about this way ahead of time, yeah maybe it'd be different, we'd have more time to plan something instead of rushing in."

Sam's jaw clenched and his eyes were no longer sad puppy. "This is a mistake. We could end all of this crap tonight."

"Well, good thing you're not in charge then huh, Sammy?" Dad finished, then looked at my reflection yet again. "Did I ever tell about this?"

"No," I shook my head. "And I'm not lying this time."

Sam finally calmed down, at least to the point his eyes weren't shooting daggers when we pulled to a stop at a barricade of police vehicles in the road. Once Dad stopped an Officer approached and leaned over to the window.

"What's going on, Officer?" Dad asked.

"Bridge washed out ahead." Was his reply.

"Oh, well can you point us in another direction to get outa town?"

"Sorry, there isn't another way. Only way out is across that bridge, afraid you're going to be stuck in town tonight."

After he walked away Dad's grip tightened on the steering wheel. "Well that's just fucking great. Now what?"

Sam held up the papers. "Shoulda saw this coming. All signs are pointing to us having a face to face encounter with Lilith tonight."

"No," Dad barked back. "All signs point to _you _having an encounter with Lilith, a sick disgusting one."

"Which isn't happening! Look, let's just find someplace to talk about this, ok? Maybe we can figure something about."

Dad did a u-turn and sped back into town, eventually stopping at a diner which we piled into. As I glanced at the menu, trying to keep my mind off of the tension, Dad continued to flip through the pages Chuck had given us.

"You know I was thinkin," Dad said. "Like you said we know everything that's gonna happen beforehand, so... Why don't we just go off the path then?"

"You mean like, instead of going right we go left?" I asked.

"Basically, yeah. Like it says here that Sammy and me have a fight, I spend the entire day driving around in the impala, and we stay at the Red Motel. We do all the opposites it breaks the pattern and maybe we can avoid Lilith all together."

I sipped at my coke. "Um, technically you and Sammy have already had a fight? You've been bickering all friggin day."

"That's not _fighting_ fighting," Dad scowled. "Ok, so here we go- First thing's first. It says I order the bacon cheeseburger, Sammy orders his girly salad. We'll just change our choices."

Sam's eyes rolled. "Yeah, cause you not eating a burger is really gonna alter what happens the rest of the day, Dean."

"Just go with it, give it a chance."

I was tempted to kick Sam from under the table to force the scowl off his face. When the waitress approached Dad finally tore his eyes from the pages.

"So, what'll it be?" She asked.

"I'll have a bacon cheeseburger and fries." I said, immediately receiving a frown from Dad.

She jotted it down and looked to Sam. "I'll have the cob salad, thanks."

"And I'll have the..." Dad sighed, looking completely devastated. "The veggie tofu burger." Once the waitress took our order Dad elbowed me. "Dude, what the hell? You're ordering a friggin cheeseburger?"

"I'm not in this story." I shrugged. "I don't think it matters what I eat, right?"

"Still, not fair. And Sam's apparently not listening to me, frickin ordering his rabbit food. If I didn't know any better I'd think that he _wants_ us to get our asses pounded by Lilith."

Sam stiffened in his chair. "Dean, I told you- I think it's a mistake to sit back and do nothing when we could at least try. Think about it, worst case scenario, she kills me- What's so bad about that, really? If I'm gone, then the final seal can't be broken and their entire plan goes down the toilet."

Dad's face went blank and I sat back to avoid the blood shed.

"Oh, so you'd just sit back and let the bitch kill you, huh? Yeah, Sam- That's a fucking perfect plan right there. Completely flawless, did you think of that all by yourself?" Dad spat back.

"I'm just being realistic, man." Sam shrugged. "If I died, then all of this is over."

"How do you know?" Dad was trying to control his tone but he was failing tenfold. "Who says that after you're dead they don't find some other way of springing Lucifer from the cage? Then what? You'd be friggin dead and the world's still screwed. Think before speak, Sam. Don't be an idiot."

"Stop calling me an idiot for wanting to fight instead of hide."

I sat up. "Um, guys... You're fighting."

"We're not fighting," Dad said. "We're just having a little disagreement. It's not my fault that your uncle's an idiot and wants to get his ass killed."

"Fighting." I repeated, scowling bitterly. "Not really straying off the path there, Dad."

I didn't even notice that I'd called him Dad until the waitress returned with our food. He didn't seem to notice it either, thankfully- So I tried not to freak out. Dad grabbed his tofu burger and held it in front of his face.

"All I'm saying is that it frustrates me when you make such reckless decisions." He said.

"And it frustrates _me_, when you'd rather run than fight." Sam replied.

I grabbed my own burger and took a huge bite, just to keep myself from cussing out the both of them. Finally I decided that if I was gonna be a part of this then I couldn't always sit there and keep my mouth shut, so I swallowed after barely chewing.

"Sammy, listen. Yeah it's annoying that we can't really fight on this one, but you gotta take into consideration that Lilith showing up here in this town when _we're _here is probably to lead us into some kind of trap. She would know that we'd try to take her out or something, which means she'd be prepared for it." I tried to ignore the way he was glaring at me after that statement. "So yeah... Dad's right."

Dammit I did it again. This whole calling my Dad "Dean" thing was really starting to rub me the wrong way. Still though, he acted as though he didn't notice. Either that or he just didn't care anymore.

Sam's response to that now was shoving a bite of salad in his mouth and looking away, but the silence didn't last long.

"Mary, I know you're here to help us out and all but I wish you'd just stay out of it." He said. "It's not any of your business."

I think Dad was more offended by that then I was seeing is that he dropped his burger on his plate and clenched his jaw.

"Dude, it's not her fault. Don't bite her head off for speakin the truth." Dad said.

"She's only siding with you because she's your daughter and she's trying to get on your good side. Am I really the only one that wants to try and end this bullshit tonight?"

"Ok, you know what?" I climbed off of my stool. "You can bite me, Sam. Go ahead, do something stupid, _again_. Don't say I didn't warn you." I started for the door but then decided I wasn't done. "By the way, you didn't have to deal with what happened to you guys in the future- Which for the record all started with this. I didn't come back here to be bitched at, or to take sides, I came here so you wouldn't end up blowing your fucking brother away and then putting a bullet in your head after, ok? So seriously, bite me."

_Now _I stomped out of the diner, making my way to the impala and sitting on the hood. I knew Dad hadn't told Sam about what happened to them. About how Sam started to flip out and it lead to him actually shooting his own brother and then himself. I'm not sure why he hadn't told him, I guess to spare him the knowledge that he killed his brother, but... Sometimes a person needs a jolt every now and then, and Sammy definitely needed one. It was his recklessness that caused him to start drinking demon blood in the first place. He wanted revenge on Lilith and that's all he thought about.

I hoped that Dad wouldn't have been pissed at me for spilling the beans on that one. If he really thought about it though he should have figured Sam would have been better off knowing. Because if he did maybe it would give him further incentive to stay on the right path.

I was alone outside for a good twenty minutes before Sam came out first carrying a to go box.

"You didn't eat your burger." He stated. "I boxed it up for you."

Yeah I knew what was happening. Dad had guilted him into coming out here and "resolving" things without actually saying those exact words. Either that or Sammy just felt guilty anyhow.

"Oh," I took the box from him and sat it on my lap. "Thanks."

"Listen," he sat beside me. "I'm sorry for being a dick in there. You were just trying to help, you didn't deserve to have your head bit off."

"No not really." I replied.

"Dean told me what happened once we were older. God... I can't even imagine what that must've been like for you. I can't believe it actually happened like that."

"Yeah well, it did."

He sighed. "I know. And I guess I understand now why you came back here. Honestly, I'm glad you did." He tried to force off a small smile. "I just hope you can actually change things."

"I'm going to even if it ends up killing me. I can't let that happen to you guys. I won't let it."

He fell silent and I could see Dad inside the diner at the register.

"Hey lemme ask you a question." Sam said. "You told Dean that I started losing it around the time I was forty, right?"

"Mhm."

"Was it just the demon blood that caused it, or..."

"No." I interrupted. "It was a lot of other things that happened after the whole apocalypse fiasco was over and done with. Most of the details I don't know since Dad didn't like to talk about it. All I know is that you got sick somehow after you were resurrected from Lucifer's cage, Cas healed you and then things just kept getting worse from there."

He nodded. "Didn't you say something about the angels?"

"Yeah. I'm not sure of the details on that one either. All I know is that it took you guys a long ass time to get it sorted out. I think it was still going on even after I was born. But by the time I was old enough to know what was what it had ended finally."

He studied my expression for a good minute, probably trying to decide if I was lying.

"And you don't know anything about what it was?" He asked.

I crinkled the styrofoam box on my lap.

"I overheard you guys talking about it one day. All I heard was that the angels fell."

His eyes went wide. "Fell?"

"Yeah, were cast out or something. Like Lucifer had been."

"Damn." He pushed his hair off this forehead. "That doesn't sound like something we'd be able to take care off."

"Well you did somehow. Or at least helped out with it. By the time I overheard that convo it had been over for a while."

"One last question." He held up his finger. "After everything was over and done with, I never... Uh, well, tried to get out?"

"You mean out of the life?" He nodded in answer. "No. Because you had decided that as much as you wanted a normal life it wasn't possible. And then I came along, and you didn't want Dad to have to raise me by himself."

He smiled, and it wasn't forced this time.

"So I helped out, huh?"

"Yeah. Who do you think gave me my first beer?" I chuckled.

"Me?" He laughed. "Funny, you'd think Dean woulda been the one to do that."

"He didn't want me drinking. And he got uber pissed at you for giving it to me. I was only fourteen. Dad had stopped drinking by then since his liver was pretty much shot. And he always said he didn't want his daughter to have a drunk for a Dad."

He seemed to approve of that. "Good. That's good. I'm glad he didn't act like _our_ Dad at least."

No kidding. After everything I'd heard about my Grandpa I was glad he wasn't anything like him either. Don't get me wrong, I knew they loved their father- but it would have been a lie if I said they _liked _him, or the way they treated them. Sam especially was always treated like the outcast. And then Grandpa going and telling Dad that he might actually have to kill his own brother. Who the fuck says that to their son? It's horrible.

Dad finally came out of the diner, looking completely unsatisfied with what he had eaten.

"So are we good?" He asked.

"Yeah," Sam slid off the hood. "All good."

"Awesome. Let's go find a motel."

Dad climbed in the drivers seat and I took my usual spot in the back. We drove around for a good hour or so until he decided a motel on the edge of town would do.

Now I was used to the skeevy motels by now, since it's all we ever stayed in- but this one was by far the worst.

"Uh," Sam said. "This place charges by the hour?"

"Yeah. Hooker Inn is the only option. Chuck said we stayed at the Red motel, and this ain't the Red."

"Remind me not to touch anything in there." Sam sighed.

Sam got out first and headed for the room and before Dad climbed out he motioned for me to climb up front.

"Just stay here. Chuck's story said that I spend all day driving around in the impala so we're gonna go park her." He said.

I nodded and did as he said, climbing in the front seat. I don't know why he didn't just keep the car parked here at the motel, unless he had something else in mind besides leaving the impala somewhere else.

While he was inside I flicked through Chucks pages. According to what he said would happen, Sam would spend all day researching, and Dad would get friggin hit by a mini van. The impalas back window would get busted, and all of this crap was leading to this showdown with Lilith that night.

I didn't think that going off the path like Dad said would actually work, but I could have been wrong. At least I hoped I was. Something told me that Sam would have this time alone to sit and reflect on the situation and he'd decide that trying to fight Lilith would be better than hiding. Because as we all know, Sam had a tendency to be, well... An idiot, when it came to decisions like these.


	11. Chapter 11

We drove around for a while now, before Dad decided a bank parking lot would be a good place to leave the impala. Once we'd left his baby behind and crossed the street he stopped and pulled the pages from his pocket.

"Now what?" I asked.

"Don't know. I guess I avoid getting hit by a mini van." He replied. "You know, what I don't get is how Chuck hasn't seen anything with you in it? You're here, you've been here a while, why aren't you in his visions?"

"Maybe because I'm not _supposed _to be here? I've pretty much just fucked up the entire timeline by zapping myself here. Maybe that's why?"

"Yeah," His eyes squinted as he looked off at the sun peaking over buildings. "Maybe. I still think it's weird though."

Yeah me too- Considering Chuck was a prophet. You'd think since a higher power was influencing his visions, that I would at least be mentioned once. But, like I told Dad, technically I wasn't supposed to be here in this year. So that very well might have been why I hadn't been mentioned.

We started off but didn't make it ten feet before I heard voices across the street. At a quick glance I could see a group of three teenagers trying to break into the impala.

"Dad," I jerked his jacket sleeve. "They're trying to steal your car!"

He spun around and instantly darted across the street. The squalling of tires and the thump of Dads body on the hood of the mini van that hit him was the only sound after that. For a moment I could only stand there in disbelief, trying to understand if what I'd just witnessed was real. Once I heard shouting from pedestrians and the woman who was driving the van climbed out I snapped out of it and rushed to him.

"Dad?" I shook him lightly by the shoulders and he grumbled.

He didn't have any lacerations, and really the van wasn't going fast enough to cause real damage, but he was still semi out of it.

"Ugh, what happened?" He garbled.

"You got hit by a mini van."

"I'm so sorry," The woman frantically said. "You came out of no where I didn't see you."

I halfway had the urge to punch her in the nose for running over my Dad, but considering he was gonna be ok I decided to let it slide.

Dad only grumbled something incoherent in return before he started to sit up and noticed his impala across the street. I followed his gazes and saw the back window had been completely smashed in.

"Son of a bitch..." He muttered, as I helped him get to his feet.

If he was hurt after being hit by the van you couldn't tell as he rushed across the street and examined the damage on his baby.

"Those little bastards." He snapped. "I'm gonna find them and run them over a good twenty times!" He then pulled the drivers door open. "Get in, we're gonna make a little surprise visit to Chuck."

I climbed in and before long we were zipping across town and back to Chucks house.

"Are you sure you're ok? You might need to go to the hospital." I said.

"I'm fine. Believe me if there was something wrong, I'd know."

"You got hit by a van, Dad." I returned.

He shook his head. "I'm fine. I've had worse. Besides, Chuck's stupid book said that the accident wasn't even that bad, so..."

He trailed off and I let out an annoyed sigh. Yeah, he was probably ok but being the worry wart that I was when it concerned my Dad I wouldn't be happy unless he got himself checked out. But, I knew that would never happen, so as much as I hated it I needed to just get over it.

He was pretty much seething the entire drive across town, and still when we stopped in front of Chuck's house. After stomping up the stairs and ringing the doorbell twenty times over and not receiving an answer Dad picked the lock and stormed inside. I followed and watched as he started rifling through stacks of papers on his desk, and searching through cabinets and drawers.

"Uh, what are you lookin for?" I asked.

"Anything that can tell us how the fuck he's doin what he's doin." He answered.

"I don't think you're gonna find anything."

"There's gotta be something. He can't be getting such vivid flashes all on his own."

Yeah, he was right, he couldn't. He was getting all his info from heaven, but I wasn't gonna tell him that. He'd find it out eventually, and something told me it would be sooner rather than later. For the moment though he'd decided to quit with the ransacking and flopped down in an armchair with a huff. He looked pissed enough to pound poor Chucks face in, so it was a good thing the guy wasn't home.

Thought that too soon I guess, because not five minutes later I heard the front door creak open as footsteps neared the living room. Chuck rounded the corner carrying a brown paper bag with some sort of booze, and he really didn't look all that surprised to see us, or well... Dad anyway.

"Um, hey." He said.

"Lemme guess," Dad said. "You knew we'd be here?"

He nodded. "Well yeah, I mean you anyway. I'm still not seeing anything with Mary in it. You, uh... Well you look awful."

"That's cause I just got hit by a friggin mini van, Chuck." Dad snapped back.

Chuck hugged his bottle to his chest, muttering a quiet "Oh." under his breath.

"Oh? So, lemme get this straight. Every damn thing you write about comes true, you know all this crap that's gonna happen and all you got to say is oh?" Dad pulled himself to stand.

"I don't know what you want from me." Chuck replied, slowly inching backwards.

"I wanna know how you're doing it for one thing!" Dad moved closer to the poor shaking prophet. "How're you so damn accurate with what you write? How the fuck do you know all of these things?!"

"I told you I don't know! I don't understand it either!"

"And I don't believe you!" Dad grabbed him by the jacket. "You gotta have something powering all of this, a person don't just have visions like that without some sort of evil influence behind him!"

"I don't! I don't have any evil influence!" Chuck screeched back.

"Dean let him go!" Cas suddenly said from behind us.

Dad swung around quickly, releasing Chuck's jacket which caused him to stumble backwards into the wall.

"What the hell, Cas?" Dad barked. "You know what this guy is doing?"

"Of course I know, and you're overreacting. This man is to be protected. He's a prophet of the Lord."

Dad's face went blank and I of course faked surprise too.

"A what? A prophet... This guy?" Dad pointed to Chuck who slithered past him and sat down, pulling his bottle from the bag. "You serious?"

"Of course," Cas repeated. "He's writing what will eventually be known as the Winchester Gospel."

"You're Castiel, aren't you?" Chuck asked after taking a nice long gulp of booze.

Cas just barely passed a glance at him before grabbing a book from a nearby table and flicking through the pages.

"It's an honor to meet you, Chuck." He said. "I'm a... Fan of your work."

"What do you man he's writing the Winchester gospel?" Dad asked. "What the hell is that?"

"Everything that happens during yours and Sam's lifetimes will be documented as the inspired word." Cas closed the book and glanced at me then Dad. "I would think something as significant as the apocalypse would warrant a book or two."

Dad looked at a loss for words and I only stood there faking the same amount of confusion. Before long Chuck decided he had enough of us and scurried up the stairs, leaving us alone.

"So... You're hip to this Lilith and Sam love connection thing?" Dad asked now.

"I heard, yes."

"Is there anyway of stopping it?"

Cas sighed. "What's been written cannot be unwritten. If it's been seen by the prophet then you won't be able to avoid it."

"There's gotta be some way though, something?" I said. "What if you zapped Sam out of town?"

"I can't," Cas shook his head. "I can't interfere with a prophecy."

"Yeah cause you're clearly not doing that already," I snapped back. "What with rebelling and siding with us and all."

Cas' eyes squinted. "This is entirely different, Mary. With this I know for certain it's been written as prophecy, with everything else, with every other decision I've made I haven't had a prophet tell me first hand what's going to occur."

"Does that really matter? You know that this whole apocalypse crap has been foretold for centuries, and still you're going against that. What are you afraid is gonna happen? Aren't the angels pissed enough at you already for siding with us, so what's the difference if you zap Sam outa town?"

His brows smashed together as he thought that one over. Yeah I guess I made a pretty good point. I mean, if he'd already screwed over the angels and joined our side, he was already considered a traitor and would have been punished. So really, what harm could it to do to help us out with Sam?

"If I do remove Sam from the area," He finally replied after a deep sigh. "I don't know what sort of repercussions it would bring."

"I don't care about friggin repercussions." Dad said. "Just get him the hell outa this town."

Cas lowered his eyes to the floor before nodding. "I would advise the two of you getting as far away from here as possible then. Because I have no idea what's going to come of this. Where should I take Sam?"

"Just take him to Bobby's." Dad answered. "It's far enough away from here, so hopefully Lilith won't decide to track him down there."

Cas nodded again before zapping away, and Dad grabbed my wrist and yanked me from Chuck's house and back to the impala.

"How're we gonna get outa here if the bridge is washed out?" I asked as he sped away.

"There's gotta be some other way outa town, it's illogical to think that the frickin bridge is the only way in or out."

So for the next hour we drove around aimlessly until finding a back road that led into the country, in the complete opposite direction as Bobby's. It was good enough we figured, and eventually we hoped we'd come across another bridge somewhere that hadn't been washed out.

A little after that Sam called Dad and he was super pissed no doubts, wanting to know why the hell we had Cas zap him to Bobby's. After Dad explained it to him Sam got even more pissed, which told us both that he had every intention of somehow having a showdown with Lilith that night. I guess we made the right call when we forcefully removed him. He was gonna do something stupid and would have ended up getting himself killed.

But there was still the unknown as to what was gonna happen from Cas actually averting the prophecy and taking Sam away. The world didn't implode just yet, but if we avoided one disaster chances were we were gonna be running face first into another one- Potentially one that was even worst than the last. At least, that's what I figured- And when it came to my sixth sense I was very rarely ever wrong.

* * *

When we got to Bobby's finally, Sam was waiting outside for us. We didn't even make it out of the car completely before he stomped over and started shrieking at Dad.

"What the hell?!" He shouted.

"Don't yell at me, dude." Dad shrugged. "It was the only way to keep Lilith from finding us."

"Don't you think that I should have been able to make that call, Dean?" Sam replied. "I'm not a frickin five year old, I think I should be able to say whether or not I wanted to be zapped away by an angel."

"Nope," Dad grabbed our bags from the trunk. "Cause I know what you woulda said. You would've wanted to stay and have a throw down, when you know how that would've gone down. Lilith would have peeled your face off, and you know it."

Sam averted his eyes to the sky and looked as though he was counting to ten to keep from exploding.

"Look, I wouldn't have done anything stupid. If anything I would've just talked to her, to see if maybe we could've made some kind of deal."

Dad slung both my bag and his over his shoulders. "And that's why I didn't bother to consult in you first before asking Cas to bring you here. Cause you don't go making deals with demons, Sam."

"Like _you _did?" Sam retorted spitefully, arching both brows. "Because I seem to recall when you did that not so long ago, right? Which, correct me if I'm _wrong_, is why we're in this situation in the first place."

My mouth went agape after that statement, and Dad's jaw clenched. What a low blow, seriously. It wasn't Dad's fault that this happened, anyone put in the situation he had been in hell would have made the same call. No one could tolerate being tortured and sliced at for decades at a time.

I watched my Dad with a cringe, expecting him to take a swing at Sam for saying that, but instead he fell silent and walked on past him- Entering Bobby's house and slamming the door behind him.

"Dammit." Sam sighed, rubbing his head.

"Think before you speak next time, dick bag." I snapped, then stomped inside as well.

Inside Dad had dropped our bags by the kitchen table and didn't hesitate to grab a beer from the fridge. Bobby was in his den as usual, reading through books, and Cas was standing just next to the roll top desk with his arms crossed staring off at nothing.

Sam waited a good five minutes before coming back inside, and as soon as he did he approached Dad who was leaning against the counter chugging at his beer.

"Dean, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that." He said.

"Yeah ya did." Dad replied. "It's the truth ain't it? It's my fault we're pretty much staring the apocalypse in the face."

"No, it's not your fault. I was just pissed and wasn't thinking."

"I always heard that people say what they believe's true when they're pissed, Sammy." Dad finished off his beer and tossed the bottle in the trash. "And, it is true. I might not have known what I was doing when I broke the first seal, but I broke it- And now if we can't figure a way out of this crap I'm pretty much destroying the world."

I sat at the table and took my head into my hands. Things just kept getting worse, not better. Sure, maybe Sam had stopped drinking demon blood but that certainly hadn't helped the situation any, if at all. Things were changing, that much was obvious- So I knew I'd done at least a little something. But the feeling of impending doom just wouldn't fade from my mind, the knot in my stomach wouldn't go away. It didn't help matters that Chuck was still insisting the apocalypse would happen. According to him Lucifer was still going to be let out of his cage, the world was still going to go to crap. Which of course didn't make any sense to me. Unless there was some other way of breaking him out other than using Sam to do it, then seriously- How was it gonna happen?

Obviously there must've been another way out there. Some other kid that had been cursed with demon blood as a baby must have been able to break the last seal. Either that or the angels had something up their sleeves. Honestly that wouldn't have surprised me in the slightest. Those slimy rat bastards were so conniving they would do almost anything to get their way. They could care less if the half the planet would get baked, and millions of lives would be lost.

Sam didn't seem to know how to respond to Dads statement and eventually gave up with trying to fix things and joined Bobby in the den. Dad followed soon after, and before long I was left alone in the kitchen. Until Cas awkwardly moved his way to the opposite side of the table and sat down.

"Is everything alright?" He asked.

"Oh yeah, peachy." I replied sarcastically. "I come back here to help and make things better and I feel like I'm only making it worse."

He refused to look at me for the most part, keeping his attention on either the table or on random things in the kitchen.

"What makes you think you're making it worse?"

I shrugged. "Just a feeling I guess. Cas, do you really think it's possible to stop what happened to Dad and Sam in the future?"

When he finally looked at me it was a little hard to miss the way his eyes were slightly widened. Oh, that and clearly I had just asked a question he had no idea how to answer, so he decided to lie through his teeth.

"If I had told you that before sending you back, then it must be true." He said.

After hearing that flat out lie, I stood from the table and motioned towards the door. "Yeah, let's take a walk, huh?"

"What?" Ok great now I scared him.

"Take a walk with me. Calm down, I'm not trying to jump your bones or something."

His eyes shifted back and forth and he hesitated standing, as though he was waiting for Dad or Sam, or frickin _anyone_ to rescue him from actually having to walk alone with me outside. But, when he noticed no one was going to save him, he reluctantly followed me out the back door. I walked a good twenty feet away or so before stopping and facing him.

"What's going on?" I asked. "Why did you just lie to me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." He quickly replied.

After sighing, I crossed my arms. "Cas, spare me. Just tell me what's going on and why you lied to me just now? Can I really not change anything, is that it?"

He looked away, cinching his lips. "I was advised to not discuss this."

"Advised by who?"

His eyes fell to mine. "Myself."

"Yourself? You mean in the note?"

"That and..." He trailed off, then shook his head. "And a face to face encounter with my future self."

"Uh, what?" I snorted out a laugh.

"After you'd run away we didn't know how to find you since you were carrying the hex bag. So I used a spell to communicate with myself in the year I sent you back here. Afterwards I actually traveled back to this time as well, and... He advised me, along with Sam and Dean, that it might be best if we didn't discuss this matter with you."

"You mean the matter of me not being able to change things?"

He nodded. "Yes, he..._ I_... Felt it might have caused more harm than good."

After hearing that I turned away so he could avoid the devastation on my face.

"You mean to tell me that I came back here thinking I could fix things, and I can't? All of that is still gonna happen?"

Cas fell silent for a moment and I halfway expected to turn around and find him gone.

"No, it can't be changed, Mary. As I've told Dean in the past, all roads lead to the same destination. Yes, certain details might be altered, but all in all everything that's destined to happen will _still _happen. I'm sorry."

I bit back tears and anger now, trying to contain myself from shrieking like a frickin banshee.

"So, if that's true... Why would you have ever sent me back here in the first place?" I spat.

"According to what I claimed- It was because I couldn't stand to see you hurting. So I sent you back to be with your family where you could be happy." After another moment of silence he finished with another. "I'm sorry."

One lone tear managed to escape and roll down my cheek, which I quickly brushed away. So, _my_ Cas had lied to me. He did it to spare my feelings. He sent me back to be with Dad and Sam, leading me to believe I could actually stop those horrible events in the future, when really- I couldn't fix a god damned thing. I halfway wanted to be angry at him for getting my hopes up like that, and I halfway wanted to thank him for actually sending me back here so I could be with them. I knew what he must have been thinking at the time. If he sent me back so far, it would be years before I would have to go back, or... I didn't even know. Eventually I would have to figure something out. I knew I couldn't stay here forever, because when the time came that I would actually be born, uh... What would I have done? Raise myself? No, that's just too trippy to think about. Honestly we had never talked about how long I would be here, or what would happen after I thought my work was done.

"How long can I be here, Cas?" I asked, sniffling. "I know that one day I'll have to go back to my own time, but how would that work?"

"It would require sending you back to the moment _after _I sent you back to this year."

"This is so confusing," I rubbed my temples. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"I don't understand? Do?"

"Yeah, I was supposed to come back here and..." I trailed off, then shook my head. "No. I don't care what you or your future self said. There's gotta be a way of changing how things go down. I don't believe that I can't alter the future. There's gotta be some way."

"If there is," He sighed. "Then I don't know how. Because destinies are set in stone, Mary. Figuratively speaking of course."

"Then maybe this was _my_ destiny, huh?" I replied. "To come back here and save my Dad and Sam?"

When I finally decided to look at him his brows were yet again squished together.

"That very well might be, Mary. There really is no way of knowing for certain until everything plays out."

Screw destiny and all that noise. I came back here to change things and I sure as hell was going to do it. Chuck could kiss my ass with his stupid "apocalypse" prophecy, the angels could kiss my ass too. I guess I was a little too much like my Dad when it came to family. Because I was willing to do whatever I could, even frickin getting myself killed or risk not being born at all, if it meant saving him and Sammy.


	12. Chapter 12

I remember the very first time I'd ever seen something supernatural. I was six and was on summer vacation. Dad decided I needed time away from the bunker and actually wanted to take us out to what he called was some family road trip. We went to Florida and I remember that it was the most excited I had ever been. It was just supposed to be a vacation, a holiday, something for each of us to take time to relax and have fun. Sam had found us a nice little hotel just beside the beach, positioned near the boardwalk- And all in all the week was the most fun I'd had in my entire life. Of course, being six years old a trip to the beach would be just as good as Disney Land in my opinion. But, little did Dad or I know that Sam had chosen our hotel precisely because there was a rumor it was haunted.

It was after a few days being there did some funny things start happening in our room. It wasn't anything big, just things being moved like Dads car keys, my suitcase and the little shampoo bottles in the bathroom would come unscrewed and leak in the tub. Easily explainable things really, not a big deal and Dad didn't seem to be concerned with it. Not until I woke up in the middle of the night and saw a woman standing at the end of my bed. For a moment I was convinced I was dreaming, seeing is that half of her face was missing and all that was left was a bloody shredded mess. She was pale as snow, and was wearing a torn white nightgown. She was staring at me in what I could only say was anger. Of course, it was kind of hard to determine her emotion seeing is that she only had half a face, but... Being only a kid I started screaming bloody murder, which jolted Dad and Sammy awake. Two seconds later Dad had pulled a flask of salt from his jacket beside the bed, flung a handful at the woman and she disappeared. The next few days after that were spent with them trying to figure out who she was so they could destroy her remains, and Dad was pissed at Sam for not bothering to tell him that he had booked us at a haunted hotel.

So yeah it would be pretty obvious I was freaked out and traumatized. I knew what my Dad and Sam did when they were away from the bunker and Cas or Aunt Charlie was watching out for me, but actually seeing it first hand... Not-uh, I don't care how brave a kid might think they were, anyone in that situation would scream and pee their pants. It was months before I could sleep through the night without waking up in cold sweats, or wetting the bed, or crying and crawling beside my Dad just so I could feel safe. It took a hell of a long time for Dad to get over it too, and he was pissed at Sam for so long I couldn't even keep track of the time that passed. He wanted to protect me from that part of their lives for as long as possible and Sam had pretty much screwed that up.

But, still even now if I saw something my brain just couldn't process it was as though I was flung back in time, back to when I was six years old and staring at that half faced woman.

So when I was standing face to face with a... I didn't even know, it was all I could do to not start screaming again. I knew it was a demon, all signs pointed to it. Sulfur was everywhere, the stench was so thick in the air it almost choked you- It's just this demon had decided to choose a meat suit that was more or less an emaciated corpse. Not only that, but it had been shot and stabbed and beat up so badly that you couldn't even identify facial features anymore. Dad and Sam had it stuck in a devils trap, and it seemed that they were just as surprised at the site of it as I was.

Cas stood beside me, as so advised by Dad minutes before hand, just in case something should go wrong and he could zap me away.

Bobby returned to his basement a few minutes after, and didn't hesitate to throw a bucket of holy water on the thing- Which resulted in it shrieking in pain.

"Just kill me already!" It screamed.

"Nah," Bobby replied, readying another batch of holy water. "You're just too cute 'n' cuddly."

"What do you want?"

Bobby looked to Dad and Sam and let them do the questioning.

"We wanna know what other way Lucifer can be let outa his cage, other than using Sam to break the last seal." Dad said.

The demon squinted what was left of its eyes. "You expect me to tell you that?"

Dad didn't answer right off and instead eyed the thing up and down. "What's with the meat suit? Couldn't find another that wasn't so... Gross?"

"I took what I could find, how was I supposed to know you would catch me before I could find another one?" It answered.

"Answer our question," Sam said now. "What other way is there to break Lucifer out?"

"Fuck you, I'm not telling you squat!"

Bobby yet again threw more holy water in its face as it resumed with the screaming.

"Tell us how!" Sam continued. "What other way is there?!"

With a nod from Dad, Bobby prepared to throw yet again more holy water before the demon held up his hands. "Wait, wait! Stop! I'll talk..." He let out a few deep breaths. "There is no other way!"

"Bullshit," Dad retorted. "There's gotta be some other way out there, because we've heard that even though Sammy's done with the whole demon blood crap, Lucifer is still getting out... So, how?"

I only stood there with the contents of my stomach inching their way up my throat. I guess it didn't matter how many times I'd gone through this before, smelling the blood and seeing such disgusting things wasn't something my stomach could adjust to.

"There isn't," The demon finally went on. "The only way for Lucifer to be released is if all sixty six seals are broken. Whoever you're getting your information from is lying."

But he wasn't lying. It was Chuck that we got this info from, and he was still one hundred percent convinced the apocalypse was happening. So, a few days after arriving at Bobby's we'd all tried to sit down and figure out _how _that would happen. No one had any explanations, and Cas had no ideas either. It finally came down to Dad and Bobby deciding that we'd need to start interrogating some demons to see what the hell was going on, and so far we'd trapped two. And both didn't have any worthwhile info to give us. Sure, they could have been lying, but it didn't seem like they were. And I guess there was always the possibility that they hadn't been let in on any super secret Lucifer plans, but- If I had to guess, I'd say that they were right... There wasn't another way because if there was, they would have busted their Dad out a long ass time ago.

My eyes shifted to Sammy who stood just outside the devils trap. His face was stern and harsh, and I knew why. He was desperate to find some other explanation out there, so he would know it wasn't going to end up being him that broke that last seal. If he could find another way, then that meant he wasn't going to go dark side again. But the disappointment in his eyes showed that he was losing hope. He was beginning to believe that sometime, somehow, he was gonna go back to that demon blood path again. He was going to make that horrible mistake and kill Lilith, and let the devil loose. Sure right now we all believed that wasn't possible- Sammy was clean, he knew the truth, there wasn't a logical or sound reason why he'd actually go back to Ruby, but... It didn't matter. He was starting to panic.

When I moved my eyes to Dad now, I noticed his face was the total opposite of Sam's. Instead of being harsh and stern it was disheartened and afraid, as though he was dreading the moment he'd wake up and find Sam gone.

"Well," Bobby said. "No sense in keepin this guy alive to stink up the place, is there? Might as well put em out of his misery."

Dad ran his hand down his face before looking to Cas and nodding. Two seconds later the demons life was snuffed out and his rotting body was laying in a pool of blood and gore on the basement floor.

"I need a drink." Dad stated, stomping up the stairs.

"Yeah, sounds like a plan." Sam soon joined him.

Bobby stared at the body on the floor with a grumble. "Don't suppose you'd take this guy outa here, would ya?" He looked to Cas. "Much easier for you to shazam him outa here."

Cas remained completely silent, but did approach the body. With a slight touch it vanished from the basement, the left over blood and guts had gone right along with it.

"Much handier than a mop and bucket." Bobby finished, before returning upstairs as well.

I lingered behind and asked the questions I knew I wouldn't like the answer to.

"Do you think the demon was lying?"

Cas sighed, before shaking his head. "No, I don't believe so."

"So you don't think there's another way out there?"

"No, the only way for Lucifer to be released is for all of the seals to be broken. That's what has been foretold for centuries."

"And there's not another psychic kid out there that could get the job done other than Sam?"

I was getting tired of hearing the word, no. But that's what he answered with anyhow.

"No, it was long foretold that it would be Sam."

I was also getting tired of hearing this "long foretold" crap. To me, that was just the same as destiny, which I was content with avoiding.

Now I joined them upstairs, where Dad was sitting on the sofa with a drink in hand. Bobby was yet again going through books, and Sam... Poor Sam looked completely defeated.

"I think..." He said. "I think we need to start talking about some other way, guys. Some other way of preventing this from happening."

Dad sighed, looking to have little interest in his drink but chugged it down anyhow. "That's what we've been doin, Sam. We're trying to figure out how Lucifer's gonna be busted out if it's not you doing it."

"That's the thing," Sam sighed. "There _isn't _another way. Which means, for some reason, I'm gonna be the one to do it. You have to stop me. Lock me down, have Cas zap me to friggin Jupiter or something... Anything to keep me from doing this."

"There ain't no reason why you'd be the one to do it, boy-" Bobby joined in. "Not if you know the truth."

"I know, that's what I keep telling myself. But, I think we gotta take into consideration that something's going to go wrong. I don't know how, but somehow I'm gonna start up again with Ruby and the demon blood. I'm gonna break that final seal and it's only a matter of time. So, we need to stop that from happening by any means necessary."

Dad's brows rose. "Any means necessary? And by that you mean killing you?"

"If it comes down to that, yeah-" Sam nodded. "What's worse in the end, Dean? Me dead, or thousands of innocent people?"

"How bout we figure out a way to stop this without anyone dyin?" Bobby snapped. "Don't be ready to lay your ass on the line when there could be somethin else out there ya idgit."

But knowing Sam, he wouldn't want to wait however long it would take to find some other way out of this. Instead he would want to rush into some alternative, which would end in him dying.

"Listen," Dad said, sitting his glass aside. "We can talk about this later, in the mean time I'd kill for some pie," He shifted his attention to me. "Mary, why don't you run into town and grab some lunch or somethin?"

"Uh, what?" I flinched. "You're actually letting me drive your car?"

"I drank too much." Was his response. "So you're nominated."

He must've really thought I was an idiot. He didn't want any damn pie, he just wanted to get rid of me so they could talk about something I wasn't allowed to hear.

But, I shrugged it off and took the keys that he dangled in front of me. Besides, I guess I needed some quiet time to reflect on everything I'd learned over the last few days. Most important being that my Cas had lied to me, and according to what he believed I couldn't stop anything. Still I was trying to pound it into my head that he coulda been wrong about that. If you think about it, a person comes back in time- Which all in all is crazy in itself, right? Anyway, a person coming back decades into the past and staying there should have been a big enough jolt to change at least something. And, I came back with all this useful information, had already managed to convince Sammy to kick the demon blood and stop being buddy buddy with Ruby, so... How much friggin more did I need to do? Jeez, did I need to do something extremely drastic in order to make sure what happened to my Dad and Sam in the future, didn't happen? Something more drastic other than having an angel zap me back in time?

I drove in silence, barely even aware that Cas had tagged along for the ride- Yet again as advised by Dad. I don't know what he expected to happen, but he had been on edge ever since we dodged Lilith. What I was concerned with was what could I do that would be drastic? What could I do that would have the kind of impact I was hoping to give?

"Mary," Cas broke through my thoughts. "You're very quiet."

"Am I?" I replied.

"Yes, is it that you didn't want me coming with you? Because it was Dean that..."

"No," I interrupted. "It's not that, Cas. I guess I just got a lot of things on my mind."

"Would you care to talk about it?"

Wait, he was actually wanting to talk to me voluntarily? Ok, that was a drastic change all in itself I guess.

"Nah, it's not anything to worry about. Just... Thinking." I answered.

But if I didn't talk about something it might lead him to being suspicious of whatever I could've been thinking about. Cas was suspicious of me anyways, either that or just completely terrified of what we'd been in the future.

Maybe this was just his way of breaking the tension or something. I knew he was uncomfortable around me, it was obvious.

"I guess," I said, after thinking of the first thing to blurt out. "That I'm wondering what Dad wants to do about Sam."

He nodded, for the moment buying what I said. "I see."

"I guess I just don't get how Sam could actually turn around and still kill Lilith."

Yet again he nodded. "It does seem unusual that he would still go through with that plan knowing what he knows now."

"So," I shrugged. "What do you think's gonna happen?"

"I honestly don't have an explanation for it, Mary. Logically, there _isn't _an explanation. The only thing that I might offer is that Sam is just inadvertently evil, which to me is hard to believe."

"No shit," I snapped back. "He's no where near evil, he just makes a lot of dumb ass choices."

"Then perhaps this will be another one of those choices, Mary. Perhaps we need to take into consideration that Sam just can't seem to resist the hold the demon blood had over him."

But I refused to accept that. No, I didn't know what it was like to have an addiction like that, especially to something as crazy as demon blood- But I'd like to think that Sammy had a little more will power than that, especially since so many lives were laid on the line.

So I yet again went back to thinking of what I could do to really nip this in the bud. And really, the only thing I could think of was somehow taking Lilith out before all the seals were broken, and before Sam could break _her_. Which, as Cas had made clear, wasn't possible.

Of course there was always the option of going against what Cas said and trying it anyway. But if I was going to do that then I'd need a weapon, and it would have to be something big... Something that could kill just about anything. Which of course I didn't have... But I knew someone who did, or at least where he could get one. My Cas... If I could come into contact with him, he could bring me something from the Men of Letters bunker. However, that wasn't gonna be an easy task. It would mean I'd need to pull the same stunt that _this _Cas had, by using a spell to come into contact and I didn't have any idea what the spell was, or what the ingredients were. If I could figure that out, then maybe I'd be on to something. Since it was the only halfway decent plan I'd thought of so far, I figured that the first thing I'd need to do was somehow without causing Cas to suspect something, have him give me the ingredients to the spell- And also what to recite to actually come in contact with him in the future. Yeah, this was gonna be a major bitch.


	13. Chapter 13

So as it turns out there really wasn't a way I could bring up the subject about the spell with Cas. Or at least, I couldn't bring myself to actually do it right off. The dude was scared of me as it was, or uncomfortable with me, if I asked him that question without phrasing it just right- He would clam up and think I was up to something. So, instead of getting down to business like I should've done, I sat there at the bar in the diner staring awkwardly at our waitress who was buzzing around tables.

I ordered our to go orders what felt like hours ago, and it was a little hard to miss how I was anxiously fidgeting.

Cas was sitting beside me, casually flicking through the menu with a stern expression, seeming to try and keep his mind off the fact that he and I were alone.

"Jeez, how long does it frickin take to make a couple burgers, huh?" I asked, tapping my fingertips on the bar. "Did they have to go out back and kill the cow?"

"I highly doubt that, Mary." Cas replied gruffly, not taking his eyes off the menu.

My eyes rolled. Cas never did get over that clueless angel thing. Even in my time he still had difficulty understanding jokes, or if someone might have been sarcastic or a smart ass. "Understanding that reference" wasn't in Cas' resume apparently.

Finally after it seemed he'd read the menu over a good ten times he sat it aside, sat up straight and folded his hands on the bar. Now he didn't have anything else to keep his attention on, and I could see his reflection in the wall length mirror in front of us- He was shifting his eyes on anything and everything other than me, which only caused me to sigh.

Finally I concluded that he was always going to be this fidgety, and it wouldn't matter when I'd bring the subject up, so I just got on with it.

"Hey," I said, nudging him slightly. "I was thinking about what you said... How you came into contact with your future self."

"What about it?" He replied.

"Well, how exactly did you do it? I know it was a spell or whatever, but I didn't even know a spell like that existed."

"It's because it can be very dangerous, and most would be foolish in actually attempting to do it."

"If that's the case then why'd you ever use it? Why risk your ass for a chick you barely know?"

He didn't seem to have an answer to that as he fell into silence.

"Well anyway," I sighed. "What kinda spell is it? Is it one of those funky ones that have all these weird ingredients?"

"They are difficult to come by, but not impossible."

I shrugged, trying to be nonchalant about the whole thing. "What kinda things are in it?"

"Myrrh, for one thing," He answered. "One thousand year old salt from the dead sea, and..." He paused, then gave me a peculiar glance. "Why exactly do you want to know?"

"Curious I guess." I took a sip of coke. "Is there only two?"

"No, there's one other. But I think I'll keep that to myself."

"Why?" I snorted. "It's not like I can zap myself to all these other places to grab them."

"Perhaps not, but your curiosity on the matter is alarming."

I scowled bitterly at him, making certain he saw it. "Why's it alarming? Like I said, it's not like I can grab the things that go into it."

"No," He returned a bitter scowl. "But something tells me you're not only going to ask about the ingredients, but also the incantation said. Am I right?"

Snickering, I shook my head and returned my attention to the mirror in front of us. "God, suspicious aren't we?"

"You're Dean Winchesters daughter, naturally I'm going to be questionable of your motives." He replied.

"Oh come on," I tried giving a cute smile. "I'm not that bad, right?"

His eyes squinted. "You're unusual."

"Yeah, I know. You've said that before."

This wasn't going at all like I planned, but really should I have been all that surprised?

"I don't recall ever having said that before, Mary." He said, his brows squished in confusion.

"You didn't... In _this _time." I replied.

He opened his mouth to respond before suddenly cinching it closed. Really, my Cas had told me how his behavior and attitude had been back in this time. Which he explained wasn't "Favorable". He was gruff, obtuse and had a serious superiority complex. These were his words, not mine. And yeah I guess in a way he was right. But past all of that there was a look in his eyes that showed he really was kind, and maybe in a way desperate for some form of interaction that didn't pertain to orders or fighting. Basically, he wanted a real family, real friends. My Cas had told me to use that to my advantage, pretty much he told me to manipulate him when it came to that soft side of him. Kinda crazy actually, but yeah... He told me to do it.

"You always said that you liked that about me." I said, sighing. "That I was unusual."

"I said that?"

"Among other things, yeah. I gave you a run for your money, was hard to deal with a lot of the times and refused to listen to you when you were trying to look out for me. It pissed you off like crazy, but you said it was my strength of character and determination to help my family that you admired. Like my Dad I guess."

His eyes fell to the bar. "You do resemble your Father in more ways than one. I suppose I can understand why I'd find that appealing. It isn't very often that you find a human so willing to sacrifice themselves for another. Humans have a tendency to be selfish after all."

Oy... My Cas wasn't lying, he definitely didn't know how to express emotions what so ever. But I guess that was because he hadn't adjusted to being bombarded with actual _feeling_s. Being an angel for a billion years and never once allowing any sort of emotion to break through, anyone would be overwhelmed if they suddenly appeared from out of no where.

"Anyways," I went on. "I know that this must be weird for you, me being here. But I want you to know that you can trust me."

He wrapped his hands around a cup of coffee that I had ordered for him. I knew he didn't eat or drink, but I wanted to give off the facade that we were at least somewhat normal, hence the coffee.

"I had no reason to believe that I _couldn't_ trust you, Mary."

"Oh," I tried to hide the surprise in my voice, but I failed. "Ok, well... Good."

"Although you are correct when you say it's 'weird'."

"Awesome," I grumbled. "Well, just ignore me then. Pretend I'm not here."

That seemed easy enough for him as he went silent and only sat there with a completely blank expression. Once our food was finally ready I paid and returned to the Impala, and the drive back to Bobby's, Cas didn't say a word. Halfway back however the car started sputtering, before the engine completely died and I had no choice but to pull over to the side of the road.

"What the hell..." I murmured, climbing out and pulling out my phone. "Dad's gonna be pissed.

"I don't think this was caused by a mechanical issue." Cas replied, his eyes were scattering across the landscape.

"Huh?" I dialed Dad's number anyways while Cas started turning small circles.

"Yeah?" Dad answered.

"The car broke down. I don't know what happened it's not my fault, the engine just died." I said.

"Dammit, how far are you?"

"Like a half mile out," I answered, sighing. "Cas I'm sure can zap us back but I'm sure you don't wanna leave your baby sitting out here."

Dad retorted with something snippy before the phone went staticky and the call dropped.

"Mary," Cas stomped over towards me. "Something's happening."

No shit something was happening, the car inexplicably dies, and then my phone? It didn't take a genius to figure out someone was fucking with us.

I tried to dial Dad's number again, since I was starting to freak out by this point but didn't get the chance. Out of no where three men suddenly appeared and pounced on us, Cas was immediately reprimanded and zapped away, and seconds later so was I.

* * *

When Bobby's creaking mini van pulled to a stop beside the Impala, Dean jumped out first and rushed over. It didn't take two seconds to know something had gone wrong. After all, how difficult would it be to come to that conclusion when both the drivers side door and passenger door were hanging open, the food was laying on the front seat, and there were no signs of Mary or Castiel.

Sam soon joined him as Dean yet again tried to dial her number.

"Still nothing?" Sam asked.

"No, just goes straight to voice mail." Dean answered, slamming his phone closed and stuffing it in his pocket.

He rounded the front of the car and then stopped abruptly, noticing markings in the dirt.

"There's been a struggle here." He said, then pointed at the ground. "Drag marks. Fuck, what the hell happened?"

"Who would've done this?" Sam retorted. "Demons, maybe?"

"My guess is angels." Dean shook his head. "There's no sulfur."

Sam rounded the car as well and crouched down at the drag marks. "Doubt this was Mary that made these. She would have been easy to overpower, chances are it was Cas that had to be dragged. He put up a fight."

"Which means they had to have been some pretty heavy weight angels, either that or they somehow took his powers away." Dean added. "Cause I don't think it's that easy to knock out an angel."

Sam stood, brushing his windswept hair from his forehead. "Good thing I guess that Ruby taught me how to find missing angels, right? Let's head back to Bobby's."

They jumped back in the van and sped back to Bobby's, and before long Sam had a map of the United States laid out on the desk, and he recited the same chant that Ruby had to find Dean. Normally Dean would have objected to something Ruby had done, but considering the situation he stayed silent. He watched as the map burst into flames before Sam said the word "Out" and a small section of paper was the only thing that remained.

Once he saw the location he let out a sigh. "Fuck... They're in Maine."

"Maine?" Dean stomped over and looked at the tiny fragment of map. "Shit, they couldn't have taken them someplace a little closer?"

"Boys, I think we need to talk about what we're gonna do about this." Bobby said from the sidelines. "It's angels we're dealin with here, which means we don't got a way to take em out. We can't go chargin into a building full of cloud hoppers, we'd never make it past the damn door."

"So what, we just leave them there?" Dean snapped back. "We'll figure something out. It's my kid we're talkin about, Bobby. And there's no way of knowing what the hell they're doing to her."

"I get that," Bobby went on. "But with no weapons, and nothin else that can take em down, how are we even gonna get inside to rescue them?"

"Dean," Sam sighed. "As much as I hate to agree with him, he's right. We don't have a way of fighting them. All we have is the banishing blood sigils, and that's not enough. Sure, maybe we could send a few of them back to the cornfield, but we could be easily overrun."

"Then we'll think of something else!" He shouted. "I'm goin with or without you two, so make up your damn minds cause I'm leaving."

Dean grabbed his jacket and started out the door, two seconds later after cussing under his breath Sam followed while Bobby pulled up the rear.


	14. Chapter 14

**_Thanks for reviews favs/followers :)_**

* * *

The first thing I did once I was tossed into a small stone walled room was try to find a way to escape. Which of course was impossible considering there weren't any windows, and the door was solid iron, and but for a tiny barred window at the top there was no opening. I could feel the onset of panic welling in the pit of my stomach which I tried to force away.

I tried to remember everything my Dad taught me. If I ever found myself in a situation like this then the first thing you _don't _do is panic, that wouldn't help matters. Instead you needed to try and think of a way to get yourself out of this without getting yourself friggin killed.

First thing's first, assess the area, find anything that could be used as a weapon, or any way of escaping. There was nothing for either of those options. This room was empty but for a light on the ceiling, and the door was barred from the outside. And these weren't normal monsters I was dealing with either, it was angels. The only thing I might have had on my side at the moment was banishing sigils, but something told me they were all too prepared for something like that. They would've known I'd try that, and probably had figured out someway to prevent them from working.

So I started pacing, before remembering I still had my phone in my pocket. After desperately pulling it from my jacket, I flipped it open to notice I had absolutely no signal. Typical. Next I started around the room, holding my phone towards the ceiling, towards the floor, the wall, the door- Anywhere that might grant me one signal bar.

"I'm afraid you won't get phone reception here." A voice rang out from behind me.

I swung around, noticing a tall balding man in a suit. He was casually leaning against a table that had suddenly appeared in the room, and he was smirking.

"It's a dead zone." He went on, standing. "I believe that's what you call it, right?"

"Who the fuck are you?" I snapped back.

"I'm Zachariah," He answered, that cocky smirk never fading. "And you are?"

"Something tells me you already know my damn name, considering you frickin kidnapped me."

"Possibly, of course there's always a possibility I'm wrong. It's hard to get good information now a days. Good help is hard to come by." He put his arms behind his back. "Mary Winchester, right?"

I didn't answer right off, because I knew all about this asshole. Dad had told me everything about Zachariah, the dick bag angel that had tried to force him into becoming a vessel for Michael.

"Where's Cas?" I asked, instead of answering him. "What'd you do with Cas?"

"Castiel's..." He paused, shifting his eyes away. "_Indisposed _at the moment, Mary." He replied. "Come, have a seat. We're going to have a little talk."

"What do you mean indisposed? What the fuck are you doing to him?"

"Calm down, calm down. Don't get your panties in a twist. Castiel's fine for the time being, but if you don't cooperate with me that could soon change," He pointed to a chair that had now suddenly appeared. "Now, sit down."

I swallowed a knot in my throat and quickly sat down in the chair as he sat across from me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"First off, are you hungry? Do you want a burger, a beer maybe?"

"Fuck off, I don't want any fucking burgers, just tell me what you want!"

I was tempted to smack that cocky smirk right off his fat face. "Ok, right down to business then. I've been hearing some disturbing things lately, about a girl-" He pointed at me. "You, coming back from the future and disrupting the timeline here. Rumors say that you're Dean Winchesters daughter."

"What?" I snorted. "His daughter? You got your facts mixed up there, chuckles- I'm not his daughter, I'm his sister."

He blinked a few times over. "You expect us to believe that the Winchesters had a sister out there that we didn't know about? That's impossible."

"Apparently not." I sat back and crossed my arms. "Because it's true. I'm John Winchesters daughter. Mary. Sam and Dean's _sister_."

"Listen, I'm not really the patient type, Mary. And I know for a fact that you're lying. You're Dean's daughter and it would be much simpler if you just answered truthfully so this entire mess could be over and done with." He leaned forward with his elbows on the table, arching his brows sarcastically. "Or am I going to have to motivate you a little?"

"Motivate me? Into what? Into telling you something that's not true?"

He sighed, giving a crooked smile as he sat back in the chair. "Alright, I can see you're not an easy one to break, so..."

His words cut off when suddenly a loud scream echoed from a room very near mine. I recognized the voice instantly and it was Cas. It shot a chill down my spine and made my blood run cold, which sent me to my feet.

"Stop it! What are you doing to him?!" I screamed.

"You had your chance to spare him, Mary- And you failed. Now, you start answering my questions and maybe, just maybe, he won't be harmed again."

"Alright, alright, fine. I'm Dean Winchesters daughter, there!" I spat.

"Good," He smiled yet again, pointing to my chair. "Now we're getting somewhere. You came back to this year, why?"

"Because... My Dad and Sammy, they... They died... I didn't want to be without them so I came back to this year."

"Who sent you back?"

"No one. I sent myself. A blood spell, one that sends me directly to my next of kin, all it required was a few hard to find ingredients."

He nodded. "Angel feather, a pinch of the sands of time, and a dragon tear. Yes, I know of that spell. But to my knowledge those ingredients are very hard to come by and you have to channel the power of your soul. How did a girl like you come to learn about something so powerful?"

"I had friends, powerful friends, what can I say. And I called in a few favors for the ingredients."

Zachariah went silent as he contemplated my story. Naturally I couldn't tell him that it was Cas that had sent me back, it would only lead him to wonder why Cas was still with us at all.

"Why did you choose this year in particular?" He asked now. "Out of every other year, you chose this one... Why?"

"I don't know. It was the first one to pop into my head as I was finishing the spell."

And, the smile returned as his gazes darkened. "Mary, you're a rather good liar, I'll give you that. Your old man taught you well, but... You just let me know that everything you've told me is a complete lie, and you don't even realize it."

"What are you talking about?"

He sighed, shaking his heads. "Piss poor humans," He muttered. "You see, Mary. There's a plan for Sam and Dean. A plan that has been in the works for centuries, and the fact that they were alive and kicking, at least long enough for you to be born tells me that something obviously goes wrong with that plan. Because, had it as you would say, 'gone down' the way it should have- Sam would no longer be living," He shrugged. "Chances are Dean wouldn't be either, considering how severe this plan was."

My throat suddenly slammed shut as I realized what he was getting at. He was talking about Sam and Dad being vessels for Michael and Lucifer. Neither of them would have survived that ordeal most likely, and the world would have been completely obliterated in their cat fight. Which would mean, I never would have been born at all. Fuck... Fuck, fuck fuck. I didn't even think before I opened my fat mouth.

"I..."

"Enough lies." Zachariah interrupted. "Now you're going to tell me what the hell you're doing here in this time, and if you lie one more time-" He stood and towered over me. "Castiel dies. I couldn't help but notice how horrified you were to hear him screaming. Now, call me crazy, but you shouldn't be too concerned with one of my soldiers welfare. So you know what that tells me?"

Yeah, I knew what that told him. It told him that I had to have been friends with him in my own time. I never would have gave a crap about an angel unless I was closely connected with him somehow. And seeing is that Dad and Sam had given Cas a hard time once he was stationed here, it would be hard for Zachariah to believe I wouldn't do the same- Being Dean Winchesters daughter and all.

"Now how did you really come back here?" He asked again.

Swallowing hard, I couldn't stop my hands from shaking. Everything that Dad had taught me, every maneuver or tip he'd given me in how to keep calm in situations like this completely vanished from my memory. If I lied, Cas would die, but if I told the truth he'd probably die anyways considering he'd been the one to send me back here.

"Answer the question, Mary." Zachariah prodded. "Or do you need more _motivation_?"

"Cas sent me back." I blurted quickly with tears in my eyes. "But I swear, there wasn't any reason other than being with my family for me coming back here. I swear."

"That might be so, but that doesn't mean you aren't dangerous."

"D-Dangerous?"

He nodded. "Uhuh. You have information that's been causing kinks in our normally smooth flowing plan. You've been relaying that information to your Father and Sam, haven't you?"

"I don't..."

"You told Sam that Lilith was the final seal, didn't you? You've gotten him to kick the demon blood. Really, Mary- A drug intervention? I've got to give you props for that one." He sighed, rolling his eyes. "But it doesn't matter. There's always other options to fall back on, other roads to take. But that doesn't mean you're done here. I want to know what you know. What other information do you hold from the future?"

What the hell was I supposed to do now?! I couldn't tell him everything I knew! It would completely nix the fucking plan of changing how things went down in the future. It was bad enough that I had to tell Sam and Dad, but telling this ass monkey angel was even worse!

"Dad didn't tell me much," I lied, knowing it was pointless. "By the time I was born he was almost fifty and settling down. He'd retired from the family business and was reluctant to tell me of his past."

"And yet you knew about the apocalypse, about Sam and the demon blood, about them being vessels." He tisked at me. "Mary, Mary, Mary. If your Father was wanting to spare you knowing of his previous lifestyle, why would he ever tell you something like that? To me, that seems like something that would be considered scary for a girl."

"I don't know why he told me that. I guess so I would..."

He slammed his hands down on the table, nearly making me jump out of my chair. "Stop lying!"

"I'm not lying! I don't know what you want from me, dammit! I can only tell you what I know, and I don't know much!"

He stood from the table, rounding to me and grabbing me by the arm, yanking me up. He dragged me to the door and it opened on its own as he continued to drag me across the hallway and to a second door. After holding up his hand it swung open as well, crashing into the wall with a horrible thud. With one final yank I was forced into this room and felt my feet skid to a stop at what I saw.

Cas was chained in the middle of the floor, his arms outstretched at his sides, he was unclothed from the waist up and his torso was covered in deep gashes that were bleeding onto the floor. His head was hanging limply with his chin smashed into his chest, and he didn't seem to be aware of who was in the room.

"You see now," Zachariah said. "Do you see how serious I am, and what I'll resort to? He's alive... For now. But that can soon change. All I have to do is snap my fingers and he'll go splat- But not before we have a little more fun with him. Believe me little girl, what he's had done to him so far will seem like a cakewalk in comparison to what we'll do if you refuse to cooperate." He gave me a shove farther into the room and I fell to my knees. "I'll leave you in here for a little while... Maybe it will give you the nudge you need in the right direction."

He stomped out and the door slammed shut, and for a moment I could only sit there shaking, before pulling myself up and rushing over to Cas.

At a quick glance to the cuffs around his wrists, I could see enochians sigils carved into them. Obviously something to keep him pinned down and from zapping away. When I reached for them to try and pry them loose, somehow I was shocked by a jolt of energy. It traveled down Cas' arm until he let out a painful cry.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry." I said, reaching up and grabbing his chin. "Cas, can you hear me?"

I gently rose his eyes to be even with mine and they slightly opened.

"Mary... Don't..." He said, pausing to take a deep breath. "Don't tell them anything."

"If I don't they'll kill you." I replied.

"They're going to kill me regardless if you speak or not." He choked on a mouthful of blood that he then spat on the floor. "It's dangerous for them to know what you know."

"What the hell am I supposed to do then? I can't stall them, I can't lie."

He shifted his eyes down to the blood seeping onto the floor. "Draw a banishing sigil," he answered. "Use it on me."

"But you're really weak, doing that might kill you."

Even though he was so injured his gaze hardened. "Do it, Mary. If I remain here, they'll kill me and I won't be able to get you out. At least this way we might have a chance."

"The cuffs on you, though... The sigils engraved on them, won't that keep you here?"

"No, it's only preventing me from using my powers or leaving on my own accord, but with the blood sigil I'll be forced out." When he noticed my worried expression he finally let his eyes soften. "I'll be fine. Yes, it might weaken me but it shouldn't kill me. Don't hesitate any longer, do it before Zachariah returns."

I didn't want him to see me cry, so I quickly knelt down and dipped my fingertips in the blood on the floor and started drawing the sigil.

"Mary," He cut me off before I could finish. "With you doing this... Chances are Zachariah will..."

"Yeah," I cut him off now. "He's gonna kick my ass for it, I know. But me dying here in this time isn't that bad. It's not like I won't be born again later."

He drooped his head after that statement. "Regardless of that... I wouldn't want..."

I didn't wait around for him to finish that sentence because I slammed my hand down on the sigil and with a shriek and a blast of white light he was zapped from the room. Seconds later the door burst open and the last thing I saw before being knocked out cold was Zachariah storming inside completely seething.

* * *

When I woke up, I had no idea how much time had passed. All I knew was that I was strapped to a metal table and my head was pounding. There was one lone light shining above me, stinging my eyes to the point they watered. Trying to move was impossible, as was attempting to call out for help seeing is that a gag had been placed over my mouth. Not that it mattered anyhow, who the hell would have heard me in this damn dungeon in the first place?

When Zachariah leaned over the table, just inches away from my face he didn't look at all happy.

"Thanks to you," He said, grabbing what looked like metal pins from another table. "We don't have much time. I was going to do it the easy way, Mary. I was going to give you the chance of telling me what I need to know, but..." He tisked again. "You ruined that. So now we have to do it the hard way. The hard and painful way." He held the pins in front of my face. "What I'm going to do now will grant me access to every single memory you have. Ones that you didn't even know were buried somewhere deep in that skull of yours. Memories that are so long gone and far away you never would have remembered them on your own. By the time I'm through I will know everything you do."

I couldn't speak thanks to the gag, and couldn't try to fight him off, and before I could blink he reached up with one of the pins and drove it into the middle of my forehead. The scream that tried to escape my throat after that was muffled. He didn't care about the pain as he took another pin and pushed it into the opposite side of the first one. By the time he pushed the third in I had started to fade in and out of consciousness, thankfully.

After that I was bombarded by memories that slammed into me like a tidal wave. So many things that I hadn't thought about in years.

From being a little girl and living at the bunker, to the first time I ever rode a bicycle, the first time I learned how to shoot. Everything. Zachariah seemed to skim past those quickly, not caring of my childhood. And I was glad of that actually- The last thing he needed to do was learn about the Men of Letters bunker. No, he was focused on the juicy details, of any story my Dad or Sam might have told me. Once he found what he was looking for the memories slowed down.

Next I could see the moments alone with Dad, the times we sat outside on the hood of the impala, the horrible things he confided in me. From the angels falling, to Sam drinking demon blood and breaking Lucifer out, to Sam saying yes to Lucifer and jumping in the cage. He told me about Sammy getting sick after he got out of the cage, not bothering to tell me how he was let out. Cas healing him, making things better somewhat- But even more horrible things happened after that. Leviathan escaping Purgatory, Dad actually being sent to purgatory after they took out the boss monster. I knew there were things he left out, most importantly things about Cas and Sam that he didn't want me to know. I didn't know the exact details about how the leviathan were let out, how the angels fell, or how Dad escaped purgatory. All in all a normal person would think these stories were completely made up and ridiculous- But I knew they were true. Dad would never lie to me, at least not about something this big.

And... Before the memories stopped, Zachariah saw the things I so desperately wanted to keep hidden from him. Cas and me together, Sam going crazy from all the shit he went through and killing Dad, then himself- And finally, the months after that where I wasn't anything but an empty hollow shell. I refused to eat, refused to drink, and had Cas not been there to heal me I would have died. And finally, him deciding that he couldn't stand seeing me this way any longer and telling me that I could go back and change things. He prepped me on everything I needed to know about this year, what I would need to do, how to act and deal with Dad's and his attitude. Everything. With a kiss goodbye he laid his fingertips on my forehead and sent me back. And that's where the memories stopped.

But I didn't come out of it, I didn't wake up completely. I was still stuck in whatever faded oblivion Zachariah had sent me to. Judging from the pain in my forehead I knew the pins were still stuck in me, and the silence in the room lead me to believe that Zachariah was gone. He got the information he wanted, so what was the point in sticking around and healing me? Nah, he was just gonna leave me to rot in that room, or leave me there until I went completely brain dead. I was probably alone in whatever building this was. All of his mook angel pals had probably gone right along with him. Honestly I was surprised he didn't just finish me off, kill me. What was the point in keeping me alive? Unless... He wasn't done with me yet. Maybe he had future plans for me.

My eyes were halfway opened, at least enough to still see the light blaring above me. I didn't have control over my movements anymore, and couldn't even blink or shift my gazes. Twitching my toes or fingers also was impossible. I could feel blood dripping down my forehead from the pins entry points and the pain was just as prevalent.

When I heard the door creak open I figured Zachariah had come to finish the job finally. To end it and get rid of me before I could cause anymore problems. But, it wasn't Zachariah.

Footsteps rushed across the floor before a familiar face leaned over the table and stared me in the eyes.

It was Dad.

"Mary?" He said, laying his hand on my shoulder. "Fuck... What did they do to you?"

I couldn't answer him, naturally, even after he ripped the gag off my mouth. With those damn pins in my fucking head I was completely immobilized. He started to reach for them but hesitated when another hand latched onto his wrist.

"Don't, Dean." Cas said, appearing beside the table. "Let me."

Well, at least I knew that Cas had survived the whole banishing sigil crap. Although, he looked like death warmed over which let me know he wasn't at all healed enough to be there right then. But despite that he reached up after steadying his own hand that was shaking, and with a deep breath carefully pulled the first pin from my forehead, then the second and third. Once they were out I still couldn't move or speak, until he laid his hand on my shoulder and healed me. Afterwards his eyes rolled back in his head and he hit the floor with a thud.

"Shit," I heard Sam say from the doorway. "What happened?"

"He's out," Dad replied, unfastening the binds on my wrists and ankles. "Healing her did him in, he was weak enough as it was, even after siphoning energy from Bobby's soul."

I swallowed, feeling my throat as dry as sand. "Dad..." I garbled.

"Don't say anything." He said, pulling the last bind off my wrist. "He healed you, sorta, but you're still weak. Let's just get you outa here, ok?" He reached down and scooped me up. "Sam, can you get Cas?"

Sam left the doorway and grabbed Cas by the arm and yanked him up. He was semi awake, at least enough that he could partially walk on his own, but with support from Sam- And we started out of the building.

Once we got outside I could see wherever we were was pretty damn isolated, the building itself seemed to be some kind of old prison or hospital, I couldn't tell. Sam put Cas in the front seat, Dad got in the back with me and finally we left this awful place behind.


	15. Chapter 15

I must have fallen asleep during the drive, because I woke up in a motel bed with what felt like the worst hangover of a lifetime. Yeah it wasn't a hangover though, it was from that asshole Zachariah driving frickin spikes into my forehead.

After I woke up I still pretended to sleep, mainly because I was trying to listen to Dad and Sam's chatter, but mostly because I was trying to find a way of breaking the news to them that Zachariah had gotten every piece of information I held. Who the hell knows what kinda shit was gonna be caused from that, how bad things might end up. I very well could have fucked up everything beyond repair. Yeah I knew it wasn't exactly my fault, seeing is that I was strapped to a table with spikes in my head- I couldn't have stopped that even if I tried, but still... I came back to this year, bringing all of this info with me. I guess I never stopped to consider what mighta happened if some dick bag angels caught wind of me being here. Hell yeah they'd want to pick my brain, literally. Demons too. I knew things, things that no one else did- Things that spoke of their futures, their fates. Zachariah was right.

I _was _dangerous.

I was a danger to everyone near me. Just me being here was putting a death sentence on my Dad, Sammy and Cas. Cas had already gotten tortured, would've been killed if I hadn't of zapped him outa there. Who was gonna be next? Would it be Dad, Sam? Or some other innocent person. Bobby maybe?

Biting back tears, I thought about my rash decision to come back here. How I didn't think it through. I was so fixated on the idea of being with my Dad again that I didn't bother to consider what might have gone wrong by actually doing this.

"You gonna sit up anytime soon?" Dad asked and my eyes shot open. "Or you just gonna lay there and pretend to be asleep?" He stared down at me with a sarcastic smirk. "You think I don't know you're tryin to listen to our conversation?"

"I was actually just trying to get the pounding in my head to stop." I replied groggily.

"Right," He pointed to the nightstand. "Soups on. Burger, pie, all the good stuff. Eat something, you need it."

"I tried to convince him you needed something healthier than a burger and pie," Sam said from across the room. "But you know him."

"Healthy food is for wimps," Dad retorted. "Warriors need actual food. Burgers are the food of champs, am I right?"

I only snickered as I forced myself to sit up, noticing instantly that in the bed next to mine Cas was passed out.

"Wait..." I said. "He's still..."

"He'll be ok. Woke up about two hours ago and mumbled something about how you were, then passed out again. Whatever Zachariah did to him really packed a wallop." Dad said.

I sighed, having no interest in the food Dad brought me. "About that, we need to talk about what happened. About what he did."

"We know," Sam said, standing from the table and joining Dad beside my bed. "Cas explained that whatever that was with the pins was a form of reading someones mind."

"So," Dad cleared his throat. "He knows, huh? Everything you do?"

I nodded. "Yeah... Everything. Even things that I haven't told you guys yet. He knows everything that's gonna happen in the future. At least things you told me."

Dad sat on the edge of the bed beside me. "This ain't gonna be good. Son of a bitch- I knew I wanted to jam my foot up his ass already, but now..." He shook his head. "He's officially on the top of my list."

Sam nodded in agreement. "Anyways, Cas was saying that it didn't make much sense that Zachariah would leave you alive after reading your mind. He said that chances are... Uh, well he's got other plans for you later on. I know it's not likely, but did he happen to mention anything to you?"

Ugh, it had been a long time indeed since I'd been interrogated by Dad and Sam. I think the last time was just after Cas and I started things up, and they suspected something, decided to grill the both of us at the same time. Guess who cracked first? Cas... I held up, dodging the questions or lying pretty damn well, but as soon as Dad focused his attention on the angel, he crumbled like a house of cards. Within two minutes every frickin thing was laid out on the table in a slur of verbal diarrhea, while I sat there with my head in my hands.

I was struggling to understand why they were interrogating me this time.

"As far as what he might want with me, no." I answered. "But he did say that they had other options with the whole Lucifer thing, other than Sam killing Lilith."

"Figured that," Dad grumbled. "I knew there had to be somethin else out there."

"But what?" Sam brushed his hair from his face. "Why do I get the feeling it still involves me?"

"If it does he didn't say," I replied. "Not that he would. Why give away the big punchline, right?"

"Well anyway," Dad stood. "Eat a little bit and get some more rest." He gave yet another sarcastic smirk. "Ya never know, maybe I'll even let ya have a beer."

Well that's strange, I thought. He must've felt guilty for Cas and me getting nabbed by angels. Actually, yeah- I was nearly one hundred percent certain he did feel guilty since he was the one that wanted me to go grab their lunch. Great, something else for Dad to beat himself up about. I told myself that once I wasn't feeling like hammered crap that I'd try to talk to him about that.

"Where's Bobby?" I asked. "You said something about Cas siphoning energy from his soul?"

"Old man went on back to South Dakota," Dad answered. "Left this morning while you were still out. And yeah... Cas, uh- Well he was pretty much gone when he zapped into the impala. He wouldn't have made it if he didn't do somethin drastic. He said he needed to touch someones soul to harvest the energy or whatever, at least enough to get him back on his feet. Bobby offered his up since Sammy and me needed to be in fighting shape."

I nodded. "Yeah I know about all of that..." Looking to Cas who was still passed out, I let out a sigh. I knew zapping him out of the building like that would've been bad, and according to Dad it practically killed him. "Cas's done that a couple times before."

"You mean in the future?" Sam asked.

"Oh, yeah... It's kind of like a last resort type deal. He doesn't like to do it cause it's so painful to the person with the soul and of course it's dangerous as hell."

"Yeah," Dad sighed. "Well, it's over and done with, and we got you back, so... Moving on. Eat your damn burger or I will."

I managed to take a few bites before Cas started mumbling from his bed, I tried to kick the covers off of me and go to him but Dad held his hand up and stopped me.

"You're not allowed up yet, kid-" He said. "Stay put."

I frowned but didn't argue, because I figured if I did try to get up I'd fall flat on my face. Dad moved over to the bed and nudged Cas a few times over before his eyes opened.

"Hey," He said. "How you feelin?"

He mumbled some more before propping himself up partly. "I... I'll live."

"No shit, Sherlock-" Dad snorted. "But that don't tell me how you feel. Cause, you know, you look like you've gone ten rounds with friggin Godzilla."

"I don't understand that reference," Cas said, then rubbed his head. "But in answer to your question I should feel back to my old self soon." He leaned forward slightly and glanced past the lamp on the nightstand that separated our beds. "I see you're awake."

"Yeah," I smiled faintly. "Thanks for healing me, oh and also helping them save my ass."

He didn't respond to that and instead asked. "What did Zachariah see from your mind? Or do I even need to ask?"

"Probably not." I sat my burger aside. "He saw just about everything I guess."

"That's what I was afraid of. Now the question remains is what he plans to do with this information?" Cas sat up further. "And of course why he let you live."

"Do you have any ideas?" Dad asked.

"Nothing good." Cas replied. "Which means that it wouldn't be wise for Mary to be alone, there's no way of knowing when he might return."

"That didn't really answer my question, dude." Dad crossed his arms. "What sorta plans would he have for her?"

"I'm honestly not certain, but knowing Zachariah it will be something far worse than his intentions this time when he abducted her. Which as I said, is why she shouldn't be left alone."

"Kinda hard for that not to happen." I said. "A girl needs her privacy sometimes ya know?"

Dad ignored that. "We're gonna have to work out some kind of schedule. Obviously we can't always be babysitting, eventually we're gonna have to get back to work."

"Hey! I don't need babysitting!" I snapped.

"Well if you and I are on a job," Sam added, also ignoring me. "I guess there's always Cas."

"Yeah," Dad rolled his eyes. "Cause he did a hell of a job watchin out for her last time."

Cas' eyes squinted. "I had no idea that we would be ambushed by several angels, Dean."

"Which shows you need to be more on guard when it concerns my kid, Cas." Dad finished. "You know now what kinda crap your dick brothers can do, don't let this happen again."

I knew I was gaping at Dad in surprise after he said that. The fact that he actually called me his kid without flinching in disgust or annoyance... Yeah, it was surprising.

"I know, Dean." Cas finally replied "And I apologize for letting my guard down. I take full responsibility for what happened, and it won't happen again."

"Wait." I held my hand up. "Wait a second. I can't let him take the blame for something that was accidental. I mean, they frickin killed the Impala and then ambushed us from outa no where. No one woulda been able to sense that coming."

"Mary," Cas shook his head. "I appreciate that, but Dean's right. I was distracted during the drive, my mind was elsewhere. Under normal circumstances I would have been able to sense something wrong, so it was my fault."

"Ok," Sam clapped his hands together to drop the subject. "So what're we gonna do now?"

I ignored the chatter from there on out, instead opting for staring down at my blanket covered legs. Cas said he was distracted, but why? Was it because of me? Was I throwing him off his game just by being here? Probably, which was further confirmation that me being here wasn't a good thing. I was making trouble for everyone. And, just as I thought before Zachariah was right.

I was dangerous.

* * *

A couple of weeks flew by and everyone was taking turns, as Dad said, babysitting me. It was annoying yeah, but what could I do about it? Not a whole heck of a lot. And as it turns out they were starting to leave me outa jobs again by keeping me on lock down in motel rooms or at Bobby's. Which was also annoying. How was I supposed to help out and watch their backs if they were too busy babying me like I was a five year old?

Dad and Sam had taken off on yet another job, leaving me and Cas stuck in the motel room and I really don't think that this was what Cas signed up for when he decided to join in with us. Watching me wasn't exactly an easy job to do after all. I was a trouble maker, whether I liked to admit it or not, and didn't really cooperate when he'd ask me to not try and take off. So far, I'd tried to sneak away twice, only to have Cas zap in front of me and drag me back. But I was starting to get restless, I wanted to help out, but apparently Cas was really taking heed of Dad's orders this time. He wasn't gonna let his guard down around me again, and he certainly wasn't gonna let me sweet talk him into doing what I wanted.

My Cas was wrong, he wasn't so easily manipulated.

I heard a knock on the bathroom door as I dried my hair, only to roll my eyes and pull it open. Cas had been standing guard outside once I stated I needed a shower, apparently he thought I was trying to trick him again- And would try to climb out the bathroom window _again_, which for the record he had sealed shut after my last escape attempt. He took a glance at the window noticing it still intact before leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. His eyes didn't leave me for a second as I dried my hair.

"Ya know, I can't really climb out the window anymore." I said, flicking the hair dryer off. "You sealed it, remember?"

"You're not to be underestimated. There's no way of knowing what you might do next."

I snorted out a laugh. "Didn't know I was so clever, or that climbing out a bathroom window was considered this brilliant escape plan."

"Not brilliant," He replied. "More along the lines of irritating."

I flashed him a smile which made his eyes drop to the floor. "Sorry, but something tells me if it was _your_ Dad and Uncle that was out there possibly getting their asses kicked you'd put up a fight too."

"You might be right, but I would also take into consideration what would be best for them. And forcing them to worry about myself escaping and being harmed would only endanger them, they wouldn't be able to do their jobs correctly."

"Yeah, I guess you might be right about that," I turned and leaned against the sink. "So are you gonna tell him that I tried to take off?"

He sighed and shook his head. "No, it's not as though that would help matters. So, if you swear to not try it again then there wouldn't be a reason to tell him."

I smiled a second time which yet again forced his eyes to the floor. "I guess I can promise I won't try it again. But, I think you know that I won't keep that promise."

"I do know. You're very deceitful, Mary. It's..."

"Irritating?" I interrupted sarcastically.

He didn't say anything and instead moved over to the sofa, sitting awkwardly, still trying his best to avoid looking at me. Really since I'd come back to this year we hadn't exactly spent time having long conversations. Which I suppose, yeah, did kinda bother me. I mean, even if he didn't have any feelings for me it didn't mean that I wouldn't want him as a friend. I was a realistic person, I had no expectations and I certainly didn't live my life for some guy... Or, well an angel. I considered myself strong and independent, which meant that I wouldn't cry in a corner if I got dumped. But still, I would at least like to be able to call the dude my friend.

"So, do you know how long Dad and Sam are gonna be gone?" I asked, breaking the silence.

He flinched slightly before answering. "Dean stated they more then likely won't return until morning."

After glancing at the clock and seeing it only 8 pm, I let out a sigh. That meant I had all night to sit here in awkward silence with Cas. Nope, I wasn't gonna let that happen, the dude was gonna talk to me even if it meant I had to slap the words out of him. So I walked over to the couch and flopped down beside him.

"So, what's up?" I asked.

He fidgeted as he continued to look away from me. "Nothing? Why do you ask?"

"Just trying to understand what's goin on through that head of yours." I replied. "So what's with you, huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"You refuse to look at me, you barely speak to me. You act like you're scared to death of me. Kinda hurts a girls feelings, ya know?" I smirked.

"Uh," He shifted on the couch until he was farther away from me. "I don't know how to respond to that."

"Well, _are _you scared of me?"

"No, of course not."

"Then, what's with you? Is it that you just don't like me?"

His jaw clenched as he stared blankly ahead. "I suppose I might be uncomfortable for the reasons that you possess a multitude of memories from a time that hasn't even happened for me yet."

My mouth formed a silent O. "Ah, I see. Yeah I guess I can see that as being awkward, seeing is that I know all of these things about you personally and you don't know anything about me."

"Yes, that and I also don't know how to respond around you... Knowing what I _do _know."

"You talking about what was written in the note?"

He nodded. "Yes."

"What exactly was written on the note? You know, the stuff you haven't told me about?"

Maybe that wasn't the question to ask, considering he went even more stiff.

"Uh..." He cleared his throat nervously. "I told myself to not ruin anything. That I had gotten considerably lucky and to not push that away out of confusion or possibly fear."

"Push what away exactly?"

"You have to understand that this is completely foreign to me. I don't understand it, so maybe you can explain to me how it happened?"

That wasn't an answer to my question clearly, and I was still just as confused.

"Um, how what happened?"

"You... And I... How did it happen?"

I could tell that was extremely difficult for him to spit out, and I tried not to let him see my smirk.

"Hm, well... I guess you could say it all kinda started when I was nineteen. Dad had asked you to keep an eye out on me cause there was some job that was gonna keep him and Sam away for a while. They wouldn't let me come with them, and they figured that I'd take off and follow em-" I snickered, considering the situation and I had yet again tried that. "So, you were to make sure I didn't do that. Turns out they were gone for a lot longer than we figured. Two months." He listened in silence, still keeping his eyes blankly ahead. "And I dunno, things changed. Pretty much from out of no where. You described it as what it would be like to be sucker punched in the chest, or like a switch was flicked on. You took it as a sign or something, I'm not sure. Anyway, things just kinda progressed after that I guess."

He nodded slightly. "Progressed how?"

I snickered. "Probably not in the way you're thinking."

"So we didn't," He yet again cleared his throat nervously. "Have... Intercourse?"

Ok that was hard not to snicker at. "Not for a long time. I think I was twenty one once that finally happened. It wasn't about that, and we both knew it." I studied his profile, since that was all I could see of him and noticed him swallow a few times over. "Honestly I think you were content with just kissing me, that was actually what flicked the so called switch."

He looked scared to death by this point. "And did we do that... Often?"

"Not really, like I said it wasn't about that. It was different than some normal, average relationship. You always said it stemmed deeper than just the physical side."

For some reason that made him give the faintest of smiles. "I suppose that does sound like something I would say. Of course it's pure speculation, since I've never been in a situation like that before. And, considering I'm an angel, I'm certain that my viewpoints were entirely different than yours."

"Hm, well not really. But anyways, does that answer your question?"

He finally looked at me, but still seemed just as confused. "Well, not exactly. You claimed it started when you were nineteen, correct?" I nodded. "But _how _did it happen?"

"I told you," I smirked again. "It happened after you kissed me the first time."

His eyes widened slightly and he quickly moved them to the sofa. "Oh..."

"So yeah, that's it. There was no turning back from there."

He obviously had something else on his mind by the way his eyes kept shifting back and forth.

"What was Dean's opinion on the matter?" He asked now.

I cringed slightly. "Well, he wasn't very thrilled in the beginning. Ya know considering I was nineteen and you were like a gajillion year old angel. But, after a while he actually warmed up to the idea and didn't mind it so much. He figured that after he was gone you were the best one to watch out for me. And, since you weren't just trying to get into my pants gave you a few brownie points too." I reached over and grabbed his hand. "Hey, I know it's weird for you, but you really don't have to worry about it. I don't expect anything out of you, I'm not stupid, so you don't have to freak out or anything."

He nodded. "Yes, it would be illogical to assume something was going to happen."

"Right."

"Especially since things are dangerous and hectic right now. And, I suppose if you take into consideration I'm not familiar with any of this, and that I don't feel what I felt in the future, well that makes it..."

"Illogical." I interrupted.

"Yes, illogical." He only stared down at my hand that was still holding his. "Ridiculous really."

"Completely ridiculous."

"And, technically it's completely forbidden. For an angel to be involved romantically with a human."

"Mhm." I tugged on his hand slightly which forced his eyes on mine. "You realize you're babbling, right?"

"Babbling?"

I smiled faintly. "Yeah... You do that when you're nervous I noticed. Why are you nervous?"

"I-I'm not... Nervous?"

"And now you're stuttering. You know what I think it is?" He shook his head. "I think you're starting to wonder what it was like, so..."

I leaned over before he could speak and kissed him. Really, it wasn't anything, it wasn't somethin torn out of the pages of some romance novel, or a scene from a porno. It was just a kiss, a small tiny insignificant kiss to jolt him out of whatever funk he was currently in. And his response for the most part was what I expected. He was stiff and startled for the first five seconds before finally easing into it, at least enough that his lips slightly parted and he kissed me back, although somewhat awkwardly. When I finally pulled away his eyes were closed and he didn't speak. In fact, he looked stunned speechless.

When my cell started ringing from the nightstand I gave a small smirk at noticing him actually jump. After patting his cheek sarcastically I stood.

"I'll let you mull over that for a little while." I said, then grabbed my phone and answered. "Yeah, hey."

"Mary?" It was Dad. "Callin to check up on you guys."

"We're good," I replied, holding back a giggle when I noticed Cas hadn't budged an inch. "Where you guys at?"

"On our way back, turns out it wasn't our kinda thing."

"But," I sat on the edge of the bed. "I thought it was a sure thing? I thought you said all signs pointed to demons?"

"Guess not." He cleared this throat. "But yeah, we'll be back there in a few hours."

I pursed my lips and began to tap my foot on the floor. I was beginning to wonder when the lying would stop, when he would stop trying to keep me out of the loop. Whatever that loop might've been.

"Ok, well... See you in a few then." I replied.

"Yeah, later."

After I hung up I tossed my phone onto the bed and only sat there. Dad was trying to protect me, I knew that much, but it still didn't make it sting any less that he intentionally held things from me. After all, wasn't the entire friggin reason I came back to this year was because I wanted to help them?

"Mary," Cas interrupted my thoughts. "Is everything alright?"

I snapped out of it long enough to realize that I had pretty much forgotten about Cas, and what had happened minutes beforehand.

"Oh, yeah." I faked a smile. "Everything's fine. They're on their way back. Gonna be here earlier than they figured." Finally for once he was actually looking at me. "So, is everything alright with you?"

"Yes," He nodded, and it was hard to miss that he was still just as nervous as before. "I believe everything is fine."

"Good." I smiled at him, and it wasn't fake this time and surprising enough he returned one.

"Mary I have a request."

"Oh..." I stood and sat beside him again. "Ok, lay it on me."

He thought it over for a moment before sighing. "You have so many memories of events that haven't even happened yet for me. And if I'm to be honest I wish that I had them, so maybe I would understand more about what I wrote in the note. You see, I know I wrote it, I know that I was being truthful so it's not that I don't believe my own words..."

"But it's kinda hard for you to take it seriously now, seeing is that up until a couple months ago you were just a normal angel of the lord, blah blah blah?" I interrupted.

"Precisely. So I was wondering if you would allow me to read your thoughts? If you would share those memories with me?"

Ok, I wasn't exactly expecting that. "Um, well... I wouldn't really have a problem with it, but there's a lot of other things that you're not supposed to see- Things that could be dangerous for everyone in this year."

"I could block the memories I'm not meant to see, you would just need to focus on a particular moment, or moments, and that's what I would see." When he noticed my expression his eyes fell to my lap. "If you're not comfortable with it I understand completely. It is a rather strange request."

"No, it's not strange... It's just... They would be _my _memories, _my _emotions... Not yours. I don't think you would get what you're hoping to get out of them."

He sat back and returned his attention to staring blankly ahead. "Yes I suppose you're right about that. It wouldn't be the same."

"I mean you could do it anyway if you want, just as long as I knew you wouldn't be seeing everything else that you're not supposed to."

He shook his head, tightening his jaw. "No, you were right. It wouldn't have the same affect that I would hope for."

I stared at him for a moment and he continued to keep his eyes off me. For a moment I wondered what was going through his head right then, but with him, it was always impossible to tell.

"Well, I need to get some sleep, I've been awake for practically two days." I said, then stood. "You sticking around?"

"Yes, I told Dean that I would watch out for you." He replied.

"Ok," I stopped before locking myself in the bathroom and leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Goodnight."

He barely muttered a response, which led me to believe I had just traumatized the poor guy. Or, majorly pissed him off.


	16. Chapter 16

_**I just wanna say thanks for the nice reviews. I wanted to reply to each one individually but a lot of them were guests. But thanks anyways, it's nice to know my story's liked :D**_

* * *

Pounding on the motel room door jolted me awake and I sat up in time to see Cas approach the door and look out the peep hole.

"Come on, let us in!" I heard Dad shout.

Cas pulled the door open and was practically shoved aside as Dad stomped in with carry out bags of food.

"Got breakfast on the way back." He said, waving the bag in front of my face.

I kicked the blankets off and tried to shake away the drowsiness when Sam came in next.

"So what you guys been up to?" Dad asked as he pulled the food from the bags.

Yeah, he was acting extra chipper this morning, which told me it was an act. He was trying to pretend that nothing had happened the day before on the hunt that was "supposedly" nothing to do with demons.

"Oh ya know," I said, standing from the bed. "Same old thing. Cas and me made out a little."

Cas' eyes went wide and he looked to Dad in a panic, but he only snorted out a laugh.

"Yeah, right." Sam said, tossing his jacket over the chair. "I'll believe that when I see it."

"Seriously, what did you guys do?" Dad went on, taking a huge bite of some kind of breakfast sandwich.

"Nothing, what could I do? Try to escape out the bathroom window?" I smirked, and Cas only narrowed his eyes at me. "But really, we didn't do much of anything."

Except for Cas chasing me down after I _did _escape out the bathroom window, and then scaring the crap outa him when I kissed him. But that's just a normal day, right? Wrong.

Dad mentioned something about their bags being in the car which I offered to grab them since he'd been driving all night. I guess I was surprised when Cas followed me outside.

"I was thinking," He said as I closed the trunk. "That I believe I'm beginning to understand why I found you so interesting." He paused and I waited for him to go on. "It's because you're so exasperating."

After lugging Dad's bag over my shoulder I snickered. "And that's a good thing?"

"Maybe not to most, but to me it's a drastic change to what I'm accustomed to." He shifted on his feet. "You see, even now that I've rebelled against my own kind and sided with the three of you, there's still moments when I see a look in Dean or Sam's eyes that shows they don't quite trust me... In short... In a way they fear me. Which I suppose is understandable considering what I am. But with you, I don't see that, and you're frustrating and like I said..."

"Exasperating." I finished for him.

"Yes, normally I'm able to predict what someone is going to do, Sam and Dean are easily read- With you I have no idea, and you have your Father's attitude, multiplied by..." He paused. "A _considerable _amount, which makes you exasperating, therefore it makes you interesting."

I shook my head, holding back a confused laugh. "Ok, so... You're saying that I piss you off, you can't read me, and you like that I'm not scared of you?"

He thought that over for a moment as his eyes trailed up towards the sky. "Would you like it if people were afraid of _you_?"

"No, guess not... But isn't that what you wanted in the beginning? When you gave Dad that speech about respect, and him giving it to you or you'd throw him back in hell?"

His face went blank. "I... That's not..." After a deep breath he nodded. "I suppose you do know everything don't you?"

"Not everything, unfortunately. But yeah, I know a lot. I know that you're not really this cold unfeeling guy that you tried to make yourself out to be. I mean, if you were, would you have given a rats ass about what your angel pals were really trying to do?"

"So you'd believe me when I said that I had no intentions of actually sending Dean back there?"

I smiled. "I know, it was just an intimidation thing. And besides... You didn't really care then. Not like you do now."

"Which can be dangerous. For everyone." He replied. "Can I tell you something?" I nodded in answer. "In the beginning when I first realized that I was starting to feel... I didn't want it. It was foreign, and in a way it made me afraid. My existence was much simpler when I didn't have emotions to cloud my judgement. Now I find myself actually hesitating where as before I wouldn't have. I would have just ran in full force."

Blinking a few times over, I only stared at him. "So you'd rather it be gone? The emotions I mean."

"I thought I did because it was so unusual and actually frightened me. But now... The thought of them suddenly vanishing is what frightens me. I don't want them to leave."

I bit back a smile and tried to avoid his eyes. "Well, that's character development isn't it?" I said. "If you feel that way there's nothing wrong with it, you know? It's nothing to be ashamed of. And the fact that you actually told me that means that you wanted to hear some kind of affirmation, which I think I just gave you." I reached up and patted his shoulder sarcastically. "Welcome to almost humanity."

I started back for the motel room door but he moved to block me. "Wait." He said, and yet again came the nerves and fidgeting. "What you did last night..." His eyes shifted back and forth. "When you..."

"Kissed you?"

"Yes," He huffed out a deep breath. "It was..."

"Illogical?" I chuckled.

"No," His brows furrowed. "It was... Pleasant."

Dammit, why was I blushing? I shouldn't have been. It's not like I hadn't been in this situation a hundred times or more in the frickin future. Maybe it was because I knew that before what happened last night, he'd never experienced it before. Maybe it was because I was hoping he might not hate or dislike me as much as I figured he did. Maybe it was because I was pretty much just lying to myself when I claimed that the thing Cas and me had together in the future wasn't overpowering. I loved him, and in truth I loved him long before he ever had feelings for me. So I guess in a way it was kinda hard being here in this year knowing that he felt diddly squat. I could pretend all I wanted that I wasn't fazed, and yeah I guess I needed to. It made sense. After all, I didn't come back here for him, I came for Dad and Sam.

"Mary," He said, I think my silence freaked him out. "Was it... _Not _pleasant for you?"

I finally met his eyes, giving the faintest of smiles. "Cas, it was always pleasant for me."

"But?"

"But I still want you to know that I don't expect anything, and I definitely didn't wanna come back here and make things uncomfortable for you. So, I'm sorry that I kissed you last night, especially since it's not like you wanted to, or..."

"I did." He interrupted me this time. "Want to."

That left me pretty much gobsmacked. "Oh..."

We only stared at each other before Dad pulled the motel door open. "Yo, Bonnie and Clyde, get your asses back in here, we gotta talk."

I snickered when Cas looked at Dad confused over our new nicknames. But wait a second... Uh... Bonnie and Clyde ended up dying at the end of their story, ugh- Couldn't Dad have found better names for us than that?

After we stepped back inside I laid Dad's bag aside and he tossed me a breakfast sandwich that I quickly tore in to. I was starving, since I didn't each dinner the night before.

I noticed that Sam was in the shower, and Dad seemed to be taking advantage that he couldn't hear us.

"Here's the thing." He said, as he sat down across from me at the table. "The job last night did have somethin to do with demons, but I bailed on it. Sammy... Had a freak out."

My mouth was full when I stopped chewing, as I gaped at Dad with my cheek bulging. "You mean because of the blood?"

"Yeah," Dad sighed, sitting back and shaking his head. "Which is why we came back here and didn't finish it."

"What do you plan to do now?" Cas asked.

"Well we gotta take that demon out, but Sam can't be there. And... I don't really trust to leave him here alone, not yet... And, if I'm gonna go back and finish the job I'll need backup." He looked at me. "Which leaves you. Cas can stay here and watch out for Sammy, me and you can go finish the job."

I almost choked on my food. "Seriously? You're gonna take me with you on a demon job?"

"I don't want to. It's not a big deal really, the douche is stuck in a devils trap. But Sam had his freak out over the blood so I couldn't finish it."

"There's more to it than just us going and ganking some demon in a devils trap, Dad." I replied. "Especially since you wanna take me with you."

"Let's just say this guy had some interesting shit to say. Stuff that you might be able to confirm on whether or not it's true."

I nodded, glancing up at Cas who stood there with his arms crossed. "What kind of shit?"

"According to him, they got their own little future telling... Something... Figured you'd be the best person to ask on whether or not the crap they predicted is real."

After finishing off my sandwich I stuffed my feet into my shoes. "Alright, well... Let's go then."

Dad grabbed his bag that I had just brought in, then took mine and started for the door.

"Sammy's gonna be pissed once he realized we ditched him." He said. "So, keep your eye on him, Cas- He's probably gonna try to take off."

"I'm sure I can handle it." Cas replied, giving me a look that said he was all too familiar in how to stop a Winchester from escaping which only made me smile at him.

Dad left the room and jumped in the Impala and I started after him but Cas grabbed my wrist.

"Be careful." He said. "Even if this demon is in a trap, you should still be prepared for anything."

"I know. I'm always careful. Make sure you watch Sam- Something tells me he's gonna be more difficult than me."

He went silent as he stared out the door to the Impala, then with a gentle tug on my wrist pulled me out of Dad's site. After a few seconds of fidgeting awkwardly he leaned down and kissed my cheek, which took me by surprise. Once he noticed the look on my face he stepped back.

"That was an inappropriate time, wasn't it?" He asked, confused.

"Never an inappropriate time for that." I replied. "I'll see you soon."

Well this was getting interesting.

* * *

Where Dad and Sam left the demon was about six hours from the motel, and when we pulled to a stop in front of a run down house with gaping holes in the roof Dad cut the engine.

"Ok, here's the rules," He started. "You stay behind me. You don't get close to the devils trap, and if somethin happens to go wrong, you run... Got it?"

I gaped at him. "So I run and leave you in there?"

"Yeah, don't argue. That's the rule and if you don't agree to it, you ain't goin in."

"Fine," I huffed. "I'll run and leave you to get your ass kicked. Sure sounds fair."

"Just do it." He huffed back, opening his door and climbing out.

I followed behind him as he pushed the creaky door open and stepped inside. I could hear someone struggling against something, and as we rounded the first doorway and entered what should've been the living room- I could see the demon strapped to a chair in the center of the trap. He was trying his best to free himself of the iron shackles on his wrists, but seeing is that his skin was raw and bleeding underneath, he didn't seem to be going anywhere.

Once he saw us he stopped struggling, and let out a sigh. "Great... You're back."

He was possessing a young guy, probably not even over twenty- One that was covered in tattoos that surrounded his entire neck and throat. His hair was dark and there were several piercings on his face. The most noticeable was a thick ringed septum piercing.

"Did ya miss me?" Dad sneered, moving closer and pulling his flask from his jacket. "So here's what's gonna happen- You're gonna repeat what you told me and my brother earlier, and maybe I won't douse you in holy water, deal?"

"Fuck..." The man breathed out. "Ya know, I'm getting damn tired of you hunters thinkin you run the planet."

"Wrong answer." Dad said, then threw water from the flask in his face.

Once the man was through screaming, he cursed under his breath yet again.

"So who's she?" The demon said, directing his attention to me. "She's pretty cute- I can think of a lot of things that I'd like..."

His words cut off when Dad threw even more holy water in his face. "Shut your mouth," He said. "Unless it's telling us everything you said before."

"Where do I start, then?" The man relented. "Oh, I know- I'll bet it's got to do with what I said about Lilith breaking the seals, right? How there's only a few of them left?"

I blinked a few times over, examining Dad's expression. Seeing is that he wasn't impressed with that, obviously that wasn't what he wanted me to hear.

"Or, was it what I said about your precious Sam?" The demon went on. "That I have it on good authority that he's gonna break that last seal anyhow? That Lilith's not concerned with him kicking the demon blood, because sooner or later he's just gonna go right back to it?"

Still Dad wasn't affected, so far this guy hadn't said anything we didn't suspect already. As much as we didn't wanna think about it or believe it, we had pretty much figured that something was gonna go wrong with Sam that would make him go back to Ruby and the demon blood.

"Or... Maybe it's got to do with our King?" The demon said now, and finally I got a reaction from Dad. He flinched.

"What about this King?" Dad asked.

"That he knows all about you. And he knows for a fact that Lucifer's definitely getting out, and he's very _very _interested in you Winchesters."

Dad glanced back at me, motioning over his shoulder for me to follow. We entered the hallway outside the living room and he nodded.

"Ok, what'd you know about this "King" or whatever he's talkin about." He asked.

Swallowing hard, I blew out a deep breath. "Uh... Well..."

"Is he full of shit? Or is there really a King?"

I nodded. "There's a King, and trust me this guy's a pain in the ass."

"So you know him?"

"You could say that." I glanced past him to the demon in the living room, he was only sneering at me with cold eyes. "His name's Crowley, and the first thing you should know about him is he's a dick and a half. Right at the moment I think he's only King of the crossroads, but... Eventually he becomes King of Hell."

Dad's face went flat. "King of _hell_?"

"Yeah, you lost the colt already, right?" I retorted.

"Uh, yeah?"

"He has it."

He stood up straight and looked past me, pursing his lips. "Well, good to know if we ever need it in the future."

Now he returned to the living room and I followed.

"Tell us what you know about us." Dad said now.

"Oh, you mean that you're dead men walking?" He snickered, then looked at me. "Well, dead men and one woman."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"You, you stupid bitch-" He chuckled. "You came back here and you've fucked everything up. You're not supposed to be here. This isn't your time. And because of it there's gonna be a shit storm of repercussions. Things are just gonna keep going wrong. You're gonna get your ass kicked time and time again, don't you get it?"

"Get on with it!" Dad snapped, throwing more holy water for good measure.

"She's not supposed to be here!" He went on. "Because she's here the universe is trying to correct itself. It's trying to abort the issue," He shook his head. "One of these days it's gonna win, and she's gonna die. She's probably gonna bring you and your brother down with her, and anyone else that she's fucking over."

Dad let out a sigh and shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You're full of shit. That's not true. You think we'd actually believe you about something like that?"

"I could care less if you believe me, it's not my problem. I'm just telling you what I heard. And I heard that because this stupid bitch came back here, she's fucking everything up. All the plans that were supposed to play out, aren't. At least not in the way we wanted. Yeah, everything's still gonna happen, just a little differently. But she's still causing problems."

"Where are you getting your info from?" I asked, trying to keep myself calm. "Who's telling you this crap?"

"Someone who knows a little somethin about somethin," He answered. "We got ourselves a time traveler of our own. And damn, some crazy things happen in the future." His eyes widened. "Purgatory, all them souls... Damn..."

I grabbed Dad by the jacket sleeve and pulled him from the room again.

"We need to kill him." I said.

"Why? Is anything he said makin sense?"

"I don't know. I mean, I know some things about Purgatory, but I don't know exactly what he meant about souls. All I know is that it was something you refused to talk about and you'd bite my head off whenever I'd mention it. But," I swallowed hard. "If he's telling the truth and they've got someone of their own that knows all this shit, we're completely fucked."

"Why? What else is there that you haven't told us?"

"I don't know, like I said there's a lotta details you wouldn't tell me about some things. Shit that always ticked you off if I mentioned it... But..." I stopped and felt my heart fall to my stomach. "Wait a second..."

"What?"

I didn't answer him and stomped back into the living room, staring the demon straight in the face.

"So you know about purgatory, huh?" I rose my brows. "Good for you. Then you also know what comes outa there, right? What happens?"

He blinked a few times over. "I know that a stupid angel went into God mode and sucked up all the souls, flipped out and started slaughtering more angels and demons, and people here."

"What angel?" Dad asked, moving closer.

"Unfortunately don't got a name. All I know is that it was an angel."

I stepped back. "Seems like your time traveler doesn't know all that much."

But it didn't matter if he didn't have all the details, because I knew already that angel was Cas. It made sense. It explained why Dad would bite my head off whenever I'd bring up the subject of purgatory, it explained why my Cas would go completely mute and disappear whenever someone even remotely talked about purgatory or leviathan. It explained why sometimes Dad would bitch at Cas for any little mistake he'd make and always say "Remember your other fucks ups?". Somehow Cas got into purgatory and took the souls, and in turn released the leviathan into the world.

"Don't suppose you'd tell us who your time traveler is, huh?" Dad asked.

"Not here anymore. You see, the difference between ours and yours, is that ours had the sense to go back to his own time. He didn't stay here to completely fuck up everything." He answered.

"Lemme guess who it was." I said. "Crowley?"

The demons face went blank. "No. Not Crowley."

"It was Crowley. It makes sense. Crowley of this year finds out about me, so of course he'd come into contact with himself from the future." I shook my head. "Damn, he's always been a pain in the ass." Suddenly a thought struck me and I wanted to test what all this asshole knew. "So, did Crowley happen to tell you about whatever might've happened with him?"

"Only that he became King, and that he runs hell in the future." He answered.

"Really? Yeah I guess that's the most important thing he'd wanna know, right?" I turned away and flashed a smirk to my Dad. "He'd wanna know if he was running things downstairs."

I stepped back into the hallway moving farther down it so the demon couldn't see. Dad followed and we stopped near the backdoor.

"Well?" He asked.

"Future Crowley lied to past Crowley," I snickered. "Kinda surprised about that."

"What'd you mean? How do you know he lied."

"Because some things happen, I'm not sure what. But Crowley kind of goes soft, faked his death and ran from hell. He didn't wanna be King anymore. Didn't mean he wasn't a pain in the ass though."

"So you think whatever else he might've told his past self was a lie?"

"Some of it probably. The purgatory thing though... He's right about that. I think."

"And you don't know what angel he was talkin about?"

"Not necessarily." I crossed my arms and started pacing. "Kinda surprised that Crowley would lie though. Even though I'm not sure of the details he always said that he was pissed at Sam for making him soft, what he meant by that, I don't know. But he always said that Sam pretty much screwed him over and because of it he couldn't do his job as King anymore. Thing is though is that... Well, he kinda saw us as family. In a weird way, even though everyone hated him. I just don't get why he'd lie... It's almost as though he wanted whatever happened to him to still happen."

Dad leaned against the wall and let out a sigh. "If he did lie, then he must've lied about you too. About you fucking things up and the universe trying to kill you. Cas never said nothin about crap like that." He nudged me. "What's the purgatory thing?"

"You don't wanna know, believe me." I huffed.

"Yeah I kinda do, kid. What happened?"

"Not sure, like I said I don't know anything about souls or whatever- All I know is that something happened and these scary ass things got out, you figured out how to take their boss out and because of it got shipped to purgatory. I don't know how it happened, or how you got out, but yeah... That was one of the things you wouldn't talk about. You were still scarred from it."

Judging by his expression he wasn't happy to hear that. Duh, who would be?

I went back into the room and asked one final question.

"How'd Crowley not know the name of the angel who took the souls?"

The demon was through talking to us, that much was certain. "I don't know, seeing is that it was an angel he probably wanted to stay away from the fucker. But, he did wanna send out a message and hope he'd hear it."

"Message?" Dad asked. "And what would that be?"

"To watch his fucking back, and not get himself killed because he wanted to be the one to do it."

I bit my lip, and looked to Dad- Who was trying to read my expression. Crowley and my Cas had an interesting relationship. Mainly it was arguing constantly, and both taking jabs at each other. They hated each other, I knew that much, but there was always something that told me that it might've just been for show. I think in a way they actually liked each other. Crowley had saved Cas' ass a couple times, and vice versa. So, something told me that message Crowley wanted to give out was actually a friendly warning to Cas to watch himself, and not fuck up with purgatory and the souls, to be careful because if he didn't then he was gonna break the world. And I was bound and determined to make sure that didn't happen.

"Well, Mary?" Dad broke through the silence. "Whatcha think?"

"I think this guy needs to go." Was my response, then I turned and left the room and house all together.

Minutes later Dad came out with the demon slaying knife in hand, which he wiped clean on a piece of tattered fabric he grabbed from the house.

"As crazy as it sounds," I said as he sat beside me on the porch steps. "I think it might be useful for us to come into contact with future Crowley."

"What, why?" He replied.

"Because he knows things we don't, and he'd be more likely to spill info more than Cas would. You guys kept secrets from me, there was so much crap that both you and Cas wouldn't talk about. So..."

"Crowley would." He nodded. "Yeah, maybe. But can we trust the prick?"

"Yes and no. He's a liar, sure, but the one thing he always does is keep up his end of a deal. And the fact that he lied to his past self is interesting."

"So he's not dangerous?"

I shrugged. "Sure he's dangerous if he wants to be. He's a frickin demon, but... Whatever Sam did to him changed him permanently. My entire life growing up if there was ever a job that you guys couldn't handle, somethin to do with demons or whatever, Crowley would show up and give you some kind of weapon or info that'd save your ass. So, yeah he's dangerous, but also not... At least to us."

After stuffing the knife back in his jacket he stood. "Ok, well- First thing's first, we're gonna go get a room somewhere cause I'm exhausted from driving twelve hours straight. Then, we'll head back to Sam and Cas and talk to them about this."

"Just gonna leave the body in there then?"

He grumbled and rubbed his head. "Dammit, forgot about our dead friend in there. Ok, grab the shovels from the trunk. We'll bury him and _then _get a room."

Dad was pretty much just as frazzled as I was. But I hoped that with coming into contact with Crowley it could help settle a few things. Of course, that's if the dick would actually not be illusive and shady like he always was, and would tell us what we needed to know. But that's just not Crowley's personality now is it?


	17. Chapter 17

Dad was out like a light once we got a motel room, and after a quick call to Sam to check up on him, I settled in front of the tv. Sam was pissed of course that we'd left him behind, but he understood. He confided in me that the cravings for blood was so strong that he nearly had a melt down, and had to actually flee from the house to avoid digging into the guy. He asked me if he would ever get over that, and I had no answer to give.

It was nice he trusted me enough to talk to me about this, but considering I was the only one that knew anything, I guess he felt like I'd be the only one that wouldn't judge him. I tried to tell him though that he was stronger than he thought, and when I knew him in the future he never once talked about demon blood or having issues with it. So, eventually he did kick the habit for good, I just wasn't sure when exactly it started.

Dad got about three hours worth of sleep before rolling out of bed, mumbling something about food and then jumping in the shower. I was starving too actually, since I hadn't eaten anything but the breakfast sandwich, and that was practically an entire day ago.

I could hear him singing obnoxiously in the shower which only made me chuckle- I hated to interrupt him, cause it had been a long ass time since I'd heard something like that. It took me back to all the times as a kid that he'd be in a decent mood and would start in with singing his favorite rock classics. So I waited until he finished the last verse before knocking.

"Yeah?" He called out.

"I ordered a pizza but I don't have any cash." I said.

"Grab some from my wallet, it's on the nightstand."

I didn't give that a second thought as I grabbed it from the nightstand and flipped it open. First thoughts was he had a shit ton of cash stuffed in there, so I grabbed a twenty and was gonna sit the wallet back on the table when I felt myself stop.

I don't know how I saw a tiny corner of what looked to be a picture, but I did. It caught my eye as it poked out from behind his credit cards. First thoughts were to just close the wallet and not snoop through my Dad's shit, but I guess I was too nosy for that. I pulled the picture out and felt my mouth go agape.

It was my picture. The picture of Dad and me on the hood of the impala, the one he told me he'd lost. The one he refused to go back and look for after I threw a fit.

Damn... He never lost it at all, he lied about that. He lied and he'd been keeping it in is wallet ever since.

I felt myself smile and after hearing the shower crank off I quickly folded the wallet and laid it back on the nightstand.

Maybe I was wrong after all, maybe past Dad didn't hate me like I thought.

He practically burst out of the bathroom minutes later with his hair sopping wet, and he glanced to the nightstand and then at me where I sat at the table.

"You uh... You get the money?" He asked.

And that told me instantly that he didn't want me to see that picture. He wanted me to believe, for some reason or another, that he didn't like me. Or... Actually I didn't even know anymore. But judging by the panic on his face I knew that he must've forgotten that picture was even in there at all.

"Yeah I got it." I answered nonchalantly, pointing to the twenty on the table. "Just gotta wait now."

He nodded and awkwardly sat down at the table. I guess he wanted to give off this bad ass persona, and if I let him know that I saw the picture in his wallet he must've thought I'd consider him weak or something.

"I ordered a pizza with everything on it. Is that ok?" I asked, grabbing a can of coke and a beer for Dad.

"Yeah, that's good." He eased up slightly once he noticed I wasn't mentioning the picture. For the moment I'd let him believe it was still a secret. "So, about this Crowley thing- Is there anything I should know about the dick before we, I dunno, summon him or whatever."

"So am I to take it that you actually do wanna call him?" I replied.

He shrugged, taking a gulp of beer. "Not really, King of Hell doesn't really sound like someone I wanna tangle with, but... I'm trusting your judgement on this one, kid. You say he won't try anything funny then I'm gonna go with that."

Great, he was trusting me. Not that I didn't want him to, of course I did, but if something happened to go wrong with this whole Crowley thing then that trust would go down the frickin crapper.

"Well, I'm just goin by what I know of him. He was a douche bag in the past, he made a lot of trouble for you and Sammy, but after whatever it was that Sam did to him- He changed. Sort of. At least it made him less... Evil, I guess."

"I guess we could always trap him once he got here, and since we got the knife and Cas, he couldn't really try anything, right?"

I shrugged. "I guess. I know Crowley and everything, but it's not like you let me hang around him very much. Even though he was somewhat trustworthy before I came back to this time, you still were wary of him. I guess he did a lot of shit to you guys before I was born and no matter how many good deeds the dude did, you wouldn't let it go."

He nodded, thumping his beer bottle on the table. "Yeah, sounds like me. Guess that means whatever he did was pretty heavy shit."

"Ya know, one of these days you're gonna have to stop being so secretive with me, cause see what happens when you are? I come back in time and can't even friggin give my Dad any info."

He rolled his eyes and snorted out a laugh. "Yeah cause I knew you'd be zappin yourself back here and all."

"Hey, ya never know." I shrugged innocently. "Are you really all that surprised though?"

"Now that I've thought it over- No, not really. I've done some pretty crazy stuff for my family. Sold my soul for Sam, went to hell, not many people out there that would go to such extremes." He eyed me for a moment. "Guess you and me are more alike then I wanted to believe. We both do crazy and stupid stuff for family."

"And I think we can both admit that we don't regret any of it." He nodded in agreement and I shifted uncomfortably. "Um... You can be honest, you don't gotta lie for my sake, but... Do you think I'm screwin up your life by being here?"

He answered with a simple, "Nope."

"Wow, insightful," I snorted. "Maybe a little more than a one word answer might be cool, Dad."

Yeah it was like pulling frickin teeth getting past Dad to open up, I made him uncomfortable obviously. I guess I just had that affect on people, since I did the same to Cas.

"I just don't think you're screwin anything up, that's it."

"So you don't hate me?"

He swallowed another mouthful of beer. "No, I don't hate you."

"Does it piss you off when I call you Dad? Cause ya know, I try not to, but it's just weird calling you Dean."

He shrugged. "Funny thing is, is that I thought it would weird me out- But I guess it doesn't, really. Honestly you calling me Dean is weirder."

He was rescued from the conversation when there was a knock at the door. He jumped up and grabbed the cash, taking a peak out the peephole long enough to confirm it was the pizza before opening it up. Minutes later we were scarfing down pizza while watching some show Dad refused to admit he was in to. Dr Sexy m.d, or something like that. And over all, so far since coming back to this year anyway, it was probably my favorite day. If you get over the fact that we'd killed a demon and now had to find a way to summon future Crowley. But that's just minor details.

* * *

After we'd made the drive back to Sam and Cas, it didn't take long for Dad to explain everything- Letting them know that we were thinking about making a call to future Crowley. Cas of course was iffy on the idea, and gave us his honest opinion which was more or less that we were idiots- Without actually saying those exact words. I understood where he was comin from, considering it was the King of Hell we were wanting to talk to. But he didn't know the situation like I did. Yeah, Crowley was a demon which normally is scary as hell and nothing to scoff at, but things were different in the future. He'd calmed down, it wasn't all slice and dice, or torture scene anymore with him. He laid low, fell off the grid and if you got past the demon part, lived a semi normal life. At least I think he did. Like I'd said a million times, Dad never gave me much details on crap he considered touchy.

"It's a long shot," Dad said, interrupting my thoughts. "But I think we should at least consider it."

"Really?" Sam snorted. "You actually wanna work with a _demon_?"

"Not work with," Dad snapped back. "Just question, there's a difference."

"Still risky," Sam went on. "We don't know anything about this guy. And... _Not _that I don't trust Mary," He looked at me. "But from what she said he's a pretty big deal. He was the King of hell, guys. Not some piss poor excuse of a demon we could catch in a trap. How do we know he won't try something once he gets here?"

"We don't." I said. "But he has info that I don't, and there's a possibility he just told all that info to his past self. Don't you think we should be prepared for something like that? We need to know everything he does. Do we really want a guy like that having an advantage?"

Sam fell silent and Dad only leaned against the motel room table with his arms crossed. Finally it seemed Cas was the only one capable of breaking the silence.

"She might be right." He said. "Under the circumstances I'm reluctant to call this demon, but the only other option is making another call to myself in the future, which I believe would be pointless. If I held things from her before sending her back here, then there's no reason to believe I'd be anymore inclined to divulge those secrets now."

I swallowed a knot in my throat, and halfway wondered if this was such a good idea. But, I couldn't back out now, it was the only solid lead we had to getting information on what _this _Crowley might have known.

"Ok," Dad said. "So go grab whatever you need for this spell and let's get started."

Cas didn't look happy about it, which was understandable, but he zapped away anyhow- And was gone for about five minutes before returning with the ingredients, which I was quick to look at.

Other than the salt he talked about, there was some sort of dried herb that I couldn't identify, so it wasn't like I could duplicate this spell later on if I wanted. He didn't bother to explain what anything was. Within minutes he had begun the incantation, and I watched as the bowl started to smoke and he muttered quiet whisperings into thin air. Before long he stumbled backwards and Dad caught him, moving him over to the edge of the bed to sit him down.

"Did you talk to him?" I asked.

"Yes," He spat. "He's not a very agreeable man to speak with."

"Yeah, sounds like him." I rolled my eyes.

"I find that to be rather insulting," I heard Crowley's gruff voice say from the opposite side of the room. "I'm actually very agreeable if you just give me the chance."

My eyes closed once I heard him, and I knew there was no turning back now.

"Well, look at you lot-" He said, sauntering across the room in his usual black suit. "It's been a while since I've seen you like this. Cas, still with the trench coat, but I suppose you would be wouldn't you. This is the past after all." He smirked at me which made me look away. "Mary, darling- I see you got my message."

"Message?" Dad asked, and already he had his knife out.

"Did you really think I'd come back here and not get a message out?" Crowley rolled his eyes. "I knew eventually you would hear about myself coming into contact with..." He paused, snickering. "_Myself_, and I knew that you would probably want to know what I told myself, so... I waited."

"So you're Crowley?" Sam asked, and he didn't look very impressed.

"Moose, still sharp as a tack I see." Crowley retorted. "Well I don't have all the time in the world so let's get down to business shall we? Mary? You have questions, naturally. So, let's go have a chat."

"Whoa, wait a second," Dad held his hand up. "She's not goin anywhere with you alone."

"Calm down, it's just to the parking lot. I know how you are in this time, paranoid and skittish, I know better than to get on your bad side. Trust me, it's just the parking lot- You can watch the entire time."

"Fuck no," Dad continued to protest. "You wanna talk, you do it with all of us here."

"Dad it's ok, really-" I said. "He's not gonna try anything, it'd be stupid of him to with an angel right here."

Cas was eyeballing Crowley in disgust, and to me it looked as though he was holding himself back from smiting him right there. Dad didn't look much happier, but he pulled me aside and handed me his knife.

"No farther than ten fucking feet from the door, and if he even sneezes you stab him, got it?" He said. "Like I told ya, I'm trusting you with this, so you better be right."

I nodded and took the knife and Crowley opened the door for me as we stepped outside. Instead of moving ten feet from the door he made pretty good distance by stopping in the middle of the parking lot.

"So," He said, turning to face me. "How's the reunion? Is it happy?"

"Shut up, Crowley- Just tell me whatever info you got."

He glanced past me and waved sarcastically at Dad, Sam and Cas that was watching us from the window.

"Am I to take it that your deep dark secret is still kept in the dark?" He asked, smiling as he waved.

"What the fuck," I grabbed his jacket sleeve and gave it a firm yank. "We're not talking about that!"

This was exactly what I feared, I knew him coming back here wouldn't be good for me. At least in a sense that he knew certain things that I didn't want coming out.

"Is that a yes?" He smiled at me now. "So you didn't tell them that it _wasn't _Cas' idea to send you back to this time? That it was mine? That in order to fix what you fouled up, I said your best bet was coming back here?"

"No, I didn't tell them- Because it doesn't matter. The reason why I came back here was to save Dad and Sam anyway, all of that other crap is just... Crap."

Yeah this was making me look so so bad right now, me freaking out with Dad and the others watching. They could probably see me getting pissed and ready to stab Crowley in the face. But this was... This was the one thing that I never ever wanted to talk about, the one thing that Dad couldn't know about.

I lied, it wasn't just me coming back here to save Dad and Sam, although that was my number one priority. Honestly there was more to it.

"Just drop it." I snapped back at him. "I got the knife, remember- I could easily jam it in your kidney."

"You're going to have to tell him eventually, you know?" He continued. "Especially when it comes time that they figure you can travel back to your own year. How are you going to tell them that you can't, love?"

"I said drop it. Kidney, Crowley, your kidney."

Everyone has secrets... Some are just more serious than others. But I was entitled to my own secrets just as anyone was. There's a part of everyone out there, whether they want to admit it or not, that you couldn't be proud of. Choices made that could be considered or hasty or stupid, that come back to bite you in the ass later. I made my bed, and now I was currently laying in it.

"Fine, fine," He relented. "I already know what you're going to ask and the answer is, no. Of course I didn't tell myself everything that I know. It would be stupid of me to."

"Then why did that demon say something about purgatory and souls?" I replied.

He cringed slightly. "I might have let that little one slip, but really it's for Castiel's own good. I wanted to prevent that from happening. You came here to change things, right. Well, just consider that my way of assisting with that."

Well I couldn't say I was surprised to hear it was Cas that was the one to release the leviathans.

"Here's the deal," I crossed my arms. "I need to know everything that you do. All those secrets that Dad, Sam and Cas kept from me. I need to know all of it. If I'm gonna change things then I'm gonna need some kind of help in this."

"That wasn't part of the deal, darling." Crowley took a few steps away. "We agreed."

"Fuck your stupid deal! I didn't agree to jack squat! I didn't have a fucking choice!" I snapped back.

"You're right, you didn't. But here you stand in the grand old year of 2009 because of what _you _did. Whose fault is that?"

I cringed and gave a quick glance to the window, seeing them still watching every little move we made.

"Please, Crowley. Don't make me beg here. Just give me a hand. I need to know the details of everything that Dad held back. All the details on Lucifer, purgatory, everything... Please?"

He put his hands in his pockets and stared at me. "Trust me, love- You don't want to know the details. You're better off left in the dark."

"How am I supposed to help or change anything if I don't _know_ anything? Telling me about Lucifer and the demon blood wasn't enough. I need to know it all."

"But can you handle it? You're a strong girl, but I don't know if you're strong enough for this. Your Father and Uncle's lives weren't exactly favorable. It was one issue after another, and nothing good came from any of it. Obviously, or you wouldn't be in this situation."

"I can handle it, trust me. If I can watch my Dad die and not blow my fucking head off afterwards, then I think I can handle this."

I knew what he was thinking now. Considering where I was and what had happened before I came back to this year, obviously I didn't handle Dad dying very well.

"Don't say I didn't warn you." He said. "Instead of telling you, I'll just share my memories. Much simpler that way. You might want to prepare yourself, it's going to be overwhelming and you might heave your guts up afterwards."

Lovely, but I prepared for it anyhow by taking a few deep breaths and giving him a nod. He then reached up and laid his palm against my forehead and just as it was when Zachariah jammed the pins into me I was hit with a tidal wave of memories. They weren't mine this time though, but everything Crowley knew. It felt like hours that I stood there dealing with that, but it was really only a few seconds. The end result was me toppling over and Crowley catching me before I heard shouts and footsteps galloping across the parking lot.

"What the fuck did you do?!" Dad shouted, grabbing me away from him and pulling me to a safe distance.

Crowley raised both hands in the air and Cas went for him, but he poofed to another section of the parking lot to avoid him.

"Calm down, she's fine." Crowley spat. "I was just giving her what she wanted."

"I'm ok." I said, getting my strength back. "He's not lying."

"What was that?" Sam asked, standing between Dad, me and Crowley with his arms raised at his sides to keep us separated. "What did you do?"

Crowley didn't answer and instead looked to me before simply disappearing with a smirk.

"The fuck..." Dad bellowed. "Mary, what the hell happened?"

"I got what I asked for." I answered, rubbing my now aching head. "I need to sit down."

Everything was rushing up on me with a vengeance. Everything that happened, all the memories of the things Dad kept from me. All of it, it was gonna take a while to sort through it all.

Cas gave me a knowing look. "He gave you his memories, didn't he?"

I nodded. "Yeah, all of em. I think I'm gonna puke."

Dad helped lug me back into the motel where I fell back onto the armchair.

"Things looked like it was gettin pretty heated out there." Dad said, he had started pacing already. "What was he saying that was gettin you so worked up?"

"He's an ass," I answered. "He has that affect on people. But, wait... Couldn't you hear? I mean, with Cas' superman hearing or whatever?"

"No," Cas answered. "Because Crowley must have warded himself before coming here. I couldn't hear anything that was being said."

I tried not to let them see the relief on my face after he said that. At least I didn't have to worry about Crowley almost blabbing my secret. The last thing I needed right now was them questioning me about it. Like I had thought, this was the one thing they couldn't know about.


	18. Chapter 18

_**So in my opinion Chuck's always been God. I know some people don't think that, but I do.**_

* * *

It was like a damn nightmare that just wouldn't fucking go away. Everything that I had wanted to know so badly was now bouncing around my skull taunting me in a way that it was keeping me up at night. First it started with the apocalypse and Lucifer being let out. Then came the solution of getting him back in the cage, which apparently was getting the four rings from the horsemen. After Sam jumped in the cage, taking Michael with him, who by the way was possessing another uncle. Yeah, a fucking uncle. Dad and Sam had another brother out there. But after they both fell in the cage Cas pulled Sam out, but... Not all of him. Apparently Sam's soul got left behind.

This supposed sickness that Dad always talked about, how Sammy was supposedly sick after he got raised from the cage wasn't a sickness at all. It was Sam walking around the fucking country without a damn soul. It turned him into something that scared me to death. Something that reminded me of how he was when he had his episodes later on in life. He got his soul back sure, but that didn't mean Sam was better off. After having his soul who knows how long in the cage with Lucifer and Michael it was so twisted and damaged it made Sam... Broken.

After all that messed with my head came what was next. Cas teaming up with Crowley and breaking into purgatory, taking the souls and turning into some crazy psycho killer that nuked pretty much all of heaven and hundreds of people on earth.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, knowing all of this crap. Maybe I was better off being left in the dark. Everyone kept this from me for my own good, I knew that now and god if I wished I could've had Crowley take it all back. Leviathans, Dad and Cas both being sent to purgatory, angel and demon tablets, prophets and trials, angels falling, Cas losing his grace and becoming human... I didn't need to know any of this. This was a horrible mistake.

I was freaking them out, I knew I was. I would sit in silence for hours at a time, just staring blankly at the fucking wall. I didn't know what to do with this. I needed to sort all this out and figure out what I was gonna do first- And, honestly- The first thing I wanted to do was knock some sense into Cas. Fill him in on this so he would know what happened if he went on such a reckless path.

But there needed to be a right moment for that conversation, and Dad and Sam shouldn't have been present for it- Cause I knew how that'd go. Dad would scream at Cas and accuse him something he hadn't even done yet, he would distrust him even more and I didn't want that. So I waited until after dark on who the hell knows how many nights after Crowley came for a visit.

Dad and Sam were sleeping thankfully, so I laid in my own bed until around two in the morning just to be safe before opening my eyes and finding Cas where I last seen him. Which was sitting at the table staring out the window. I quietly kicked the blankets off of me and got out of bed, making it to Cas just in time to press my hand over his mouth to keep him from talking, and bringing my finger to my own lips to shush him. He nodded and I motioned for the door which he followed me to. After quietly pulling it open and stepping outside, I let out a deep breath.

Beside the Impala was far enough away from the room that Dad or Sam wouldn't hear if they happened to wake up, so I sat on the hood. Cas stood in front of me awkwardly, as I tried to find a way to bring this subject up.

"Ok, so..." I cleared my throat. "I know everyone is wondering what all I know now. And I've been trying to figure out a way to somehow break the news. But I think that it might better if I didn't tell Dad or Sam."

"Why?" He replied.

"I don't know, I mean- I'll tell them eventually, but right now I think the better person to talk to would be you." Sighing deeply, I didn't think something like this would be so damn hard. "Look, uh... This isn't easy, and I know you're gonna think I'm full of shit, but... Just please don't."

Already his eyes were squinted in confusion. "Well, what is it?"

"It's about certain things that happen in the future. Stuff that... That you caused."

"Me?"

"Yeah, and it ain't good, Cas. In fact, it's really really bad. That's why I'm tellin you this, so hopefully it won't happen. So I'm just gonna spit it all out, ok?" He nodded. "After the whole apocalypse thing is over and done with you make some really stupid decisions. For one, teaming up with _this_ Crowley to break into Purgatory and get all the souls." His eyes widened. "And you did it, you got the souls and what happened after that was awful. You flipped the fuck out and started killing, not only people here but you pretty much destroyed heaven. And if that wasn't bad enough after all that happened you accidentally released these... _Things_, into the world. These creatures called leviathan. From what I saw from Crowley, they were really nasty things, and dangerous."

Once I finally stopped talking I needed to catch my breath, and Cas refused to peel his eyes off the ground. He looked beyond pissed and I was waiting for him to explode.

"How do I know that's true?" He finally replied. "How do I know that Crowley wasn't lying?"

"Because I know it's true. There was always a secret between you and Dad, whenever I'd bring up the subject of purgatory you both would clam up and refuse to talk. You'd get pissy and take off, and Dad would get equally pissy. I always knew there was somethin about all that that you weren't telling me but I just never knew it'd be something like that."

"But that's not definite proof, Mary." He shook his head. "Crowley could have tricked you."

"It's more than just the purgatory thing, Cas-" I went on. "After the leviathan thing happened you and Dad were stuck in purgatory together for a year, once you got out some angel called Naomi started messing with your head. She got you to do things, she brainwashed you or something- And the end result of that once you got control back was siding with another angel you shouldn't have. Because of that, you... Lost your grace and the angels were expelled from heaven."

"This doesn't..." He paused and started pacing. "This doesn't make sense. Why would I do these things? You're saying that I became the next Lucifer, what I supposedly did was a crime punishable by something worse than death, Mary. Why would I have ever done something like that?"

"Because of some archangel named Raphael." I answered. "After the apocalypse ends, Michael got locked in the cage with Lucifer and he decided he wanted to take over. He was a dick, and wanted to jump start the apocalypse all over again and destroy the world. You didn't want that to happen so you stooped to drastic measures. If it's any consolation your heart was in the right place."

He stopped pacing when he sat beside me on the hood. "And if that wasn't horrible enough you say I make even more mistakes. Mistakes that end up getting my brothers and sisters cast out of heaven?"

"That wasn't your fault. You were tricked. It was some spell that this angel made you believe was going to seal up heaven, but he lied to you. It was actually to cast the angels out. The last piece was your grace which he cut out of you."

"So I became human? But when I spoke to the future version of myself I was still an angel?"

"Yeah I don't know exactly how that happened. I only know as much as Crowley knew. But obviously you get your grace back somehow."

He swallowed a few times over and refused to look at me. "This is all very hard to believe, if this is true and I really do all of those horrible things, what am I supposed to do?"

"Hey," I grabbed his hand. "I know that you don't know me, I'm pretty much a stranger to you. But I do know _you_. I've known you all my life, and the one thing I've always known and believed is that you were _good_. You had a kind heart. I'm not the only one that believed that. Dad and Sammy did too. If they didn't, then why would you have been like a brother to them?"

His eyes practically seared into my hand that held his. "How can you have so much faith in me still after learning of the things that I did?"

"Because I know you. And I believe that you'll do the right thing this time. You won't make those mistakes now that you know everything."

He nodded and his expression was devastating. "I'll never do those things. I know that I've said you can't alter the past but with this I have to. We're going to have to help each other, Mary. You want to change what happens to your Father and Sam, and I'll do whatever I can to help with that, but... In order for us to work together we're going to have to be honest with each other."

I gave him a lopsided expression. "Uh, yeah ok?"

His eyes fixed onto mine. "I wasn't being truthful when I said I couldn't overhear the conversation between Crowley and yourself. I heard everything and I know that you're holding back a secret, Mary. Judging by how angry you became once Crowley mentioned it, obviously it's something massive."

I tried to jerk my hand away but he tightened his grip. "That's not something we're gonna talk about, Cas. It's nothing important."

"I think it is. Or else you wouldn't be so frightened right now. What happened, Mary? What did you do?"

Dammit... I just had to go and suggest Crowley coming back here. I knew this would happen, I knew that what I wanted to stay hidden would come out in the open.

"I did what I had to do." I answered, giving Cas my own hardened expression.

"That doesn't tell me what it was."

"You don't need to know. It doesn't matter anymore."

"Tell me, Mary. If you trust me as much as you say you do then you can tell me. I won't judge you."

My eyes filled with tears which he clearly noticed. "I can't, Cas. It's not about trust this time. This is just something I have to keep to myself. A decision I made, that I now have to live with. It's my problem, not yours, or Dad and Sam's ."

What else could he do but say nothing? I wasn't gonna spill my secrets anytime soon and he wasn't the type to pry, at least he wasn't yet. Sure, in the future he got past that and would grill you just like Dad would until you cracked- But, for the moment I could at least rest assured that what I did before coming back to this year would stay hidden.

* * *

Castiel was surprised to hear his prayers to him. For a moment he wondered if perhaps it was a trap set by Zachariah and his past superiors. It was alarming enough that he considered not answering the calls, but curiosity at this point, and the fact that it was the prophet forced him to set those inhibitions aside. He could have information that would be crucial to the Winchesters. So he made certain that everyone was safe in the motel room, and fast asleep, before he moved to the prophets home.

First thoughts once he saw the darkness and heard the deafening silence was that Chuck was asleep, which only strengthened his paranoia that this could possibly be a trap. But when Chuck suddenly rounded the corner and smacked him in the head with a baseball bat, he knew he had been wrong.

For a moment he stumbled backwards, not feeling the pain from the blow but the shock, he took a few seconds to regain his footing before Chuck let out a sigh.

"Castiel," He breathed out, shaking. "I'm... I'm sorry, I didn't know it was you."

"You called for me, didn't you?" Castiel replied, rubbing the blood from his temple.

"Yeah, I did... But I didn't think you'd actually answer it." He tossed the bat aside and moved into his living room. "We gotta make this quick, for the moment I don't think I'm being watched."

"What's going on?"

"I had another vision," He answered, waving his hands near his head. "And it's big. Like, really big. Something that I don't think I was supposed to see. I've been wanting to talk to you guys for a while but Zachariah wouldn't let me. You know, that guy is a major pain in the ass."

"Get to why you called. What did you see?" Cas tried not to lose his temper, but this man could be infuriating at times.

He stopped near his desk and let out a sigh. "They're planning something. I'm not sure what, but from what I could see it involves you."

"Me? Only me?"

"Well, no... Sam too, and I guess Mary and Dean, but you and Sam-" He huffed out a breath of air. "You two were the main focus. I dunno what's going on, but from what I saw they're going to do something drastic to be sure the last seal's broken and Lucifer's let out."

"What do you mean? What could they do to ensure that happening?"

"I don't know. But with you, they're coming after you. They're gonna reprimand you or something, force you to come back to their side. I don't know how, but... They're gonna do it."

Cas' eyes squinted. "That's not possible. I wouldn't rejoin their side no matter what they did."

"Don't underestimate them, Cas." Chuck warned. "They know what they're doing."

"What do they plan to do with Mary and Dean?"

"I don't know yet. But it's nothing good. They consider Mary to be a... Well a hindrance I guess. I mean, she came back in time with all of this information that's completely screwing up their plans and they wanna take her out."

"Take her out? You mean kill her?"

Chuck nodded. "That's what it seemed like to me."

Cas started pacing. "How? When?"

"I don't know. I just know it won't be long before the last seal's broken." He watched the angel pace back and forth. "You can't let that happen, Cas. You can't let her die."

He stopped dead in his tracks. "I know that."

"No, you don't get it. I mean... They won't just kill her. They'll make sure that she's never born to begin with." He reached for his bottle of Jack, but then halted. "Cas... I saw some other things in the vision, stuff that's not gonna happen for a while, but I saw it anyway. Stuff that involves you and Mary."

"What do you mean?"

"You know already I think."

Cas' lips cinched and he looked away quickly, for some reason unable to meet the prophets eyes. "And I suppose that is something that _shouldn't _happen?"

"That's not really for me to decide, Cas. I mean, it's your life, right? You can make up your own mind, make your own choices."

He shook his head, for some strange reason feeling comfort somehow in confiding in the prophet.

"I don't know what to do. Every instinct is telling me that it's wrong, it's forbidden. Something punishable by death."

"So is rebelling, right?" Chuck snickered. "You kinda broke the rules when you abandoned your garrison and teamed up with the Winchesters, right? So, how is this any worse?"

"Because it's not only myself that I could be putting in danger, but Mary as well."

Chuck shrugged. "Nah, I don't think so. And I don't think it's the thought that it's "forbidden" that's bothering you. I think you're just freaked out. You're scared because it's already started, you already feel something for her."

"Which is ridiculous," Cas resumed the pacing. "How could I? Angels were not meant for something like this."

"So?"

"_So_?" Cas yet again stopped, glowering at him. "Angels were created specifically for obedience, to be Gods soldiers, not to fall and take on the characteristics of humans, and certainly not to allow emotions like that to hinder their judgement."

Chuck crossed his arms and eyed him up and down. "Last I heard God wasn't in charge anymore. But you know, I bet he still knows what's happening and do you really think that one angel who's decided he has feelings for a girl is gonna make him throw some fit? I honestly don't think he cares." He snickered yet again. "And like I said, you've already broken the rules anyway so I don't think that _little _thing is gonna matter."

Castiel actually found himself sitting on the sofa, resting his elbows on his knees. "But you don't know that for certain. You're just a mouth piece for the inspired word, you have no idea what God would approve of."

"Well, I kinda do... If the visions I've been having lately have anything to do with it."

Cas lowered his eyes to the floor, shaking his head. "I just wish someone would tell me what to do... About everything."

"You already know what to do, and you've been doing it." Chuck moved closer. "Look, I know I'm just a prophet and maybe my opinion doesn't matter to you- But trust me... You're making the right choices. And I think deep down you know you are."

Cas shifted his eyes up to Chucks, feeling his brows furrow. "I don't understand why you're so concerned with what I do."

Chuck smiled. "Let's just say I'm interested I guess. But anyway, you should get outa here now. I told you what needed to be said, so... You need to figure out a way to prevent it from happening."

Cas nodded, standing from the sofa. "Thank you for the warning."

Chuck only smiled slightly before watching the angel zap away.

Once Cas returned to the motel he didn't enter the room and instead decided to stand in the parking lot to gather his thoughts. Sam and Dean would need to hear what Chuck had told him first, before Mary. He knew that Dean wanted to spare his daughter details that might alarm her.

He was there an hour before he sensed several presences behind him, and after turning slowly, an angel blade slid out of his coat sleeve at seeing three of his brothers.

"Drop your weapon." One said. "Or the girl dies."

Castiel hesitated doing so, before he saw movement from the motel room window. An angel was inside as well, standing beside Mary's sleeping form with a blade in hand.

"He's under strict instructions that if you do not come with us willingly then he's to cut her throat." The angel said. "So make your decision now, Castiel."

He calculated how long it would take for him to zap inside and stop the man, knowing that as soon as he made a move then Mary would be dead.

"If I come with you, how do I know you won't kill her anyhow?" He asked.

"Killing her wasn't our orders, brother. Bringing you back home _was_. If you come with us without us needing to use force, then she'll survive."

Cas swallowed hard, feeling his jaw clench. Chuck was right, only he didn't figure it would be so soon that this would happen. Finally he opened his hand and the angel blade fell to the ground, seconds later two of his brothers approached and grabbed each arm and zapped him away.


	19. Chapter 19

I wasn't really surprised when Cas disappeared, at least for the first couple days. It wasn't unusual that he'd zap away and do his own thing out there, trying to help us out. But after a week went by, and then another week and he didn't come back, and he didn't answer our calls- I started freak out. Dad too didn't know what to think, and when the third week came and passed we were all expecting the worst.

Something happened to him obviously, and we all knew who was the culprit. The asshole Zachariah. The questions that remained was what did he to do Cas? And also... Was Cas still alive?

Things just kept getting worse from there when Sammy started acting really strange. Anxious for starters, and then eventually he started blowing up at Dad and me for no reason what so ever. I was devastated when I woke up in the middle of the night and caught him sneaking out. Dad and me followed him, naturally, finding him hauled up in a motel with Ruby.

It was happening... It was happening all over again and I couldn't understand how. I knew he wouldn't have done this on his own. No way. Chances were Zachariah had somehow gotten to him too.

Dad didn't know what to do about it, we tried talking to Sam, tried to reason with him but it didn't work. He was yet again dead set on the task of killing Lilith, and no matter what I tried to tell him he wouldn't hear it. He started calling me a liar, saying that I came back to this year to cause them problems and I wasn't really there to help. It was at that moment that both Dad and I knew he'd been brainwashed, it wasn't our Sammy talking anymore, but the fucked up and angry creation of a douche bag angel called Zachariah. So we locked him down, and tied him to a frickin chair to keep him from taking off again.

It didn't work. He somehow escaped.

We had been driving for hours trying to figure out where he'd gone. But he left his phone behind, and being with Ruby, well... We had no idea where they would go. We had just stopped for gas and as Dad went inside to pay, I was sitting in the front seat of the Impala one second, and then standing in the middle of an elegant room the next.

For a moment I only stood there with my arms hanging limply at my sides, before taking a small circle and realizing that Dad hadn't been zapped here with me.

I was alone.

"What the hell..." I muttered before hearing a flapping of wings behind me.

"Mary." Cas said, which caused me to turn around quickly.

"Cas?" I breathed out. "What the hell happened to you? What's going on?"

I took a few steps closer towards him but he reacted by backing away.

"It's happening. It's time." He said, and despite the gruffness to his voice I could see a look of pure despair in his eyes.

"What's happening? Time for what?" I replied.

"For Sam to break the final seal. It's going to happen, soon."

Swallowing a knot in my throat my hands clenched into fists. "And seeing is that you have me trapped in this room, I guess it's easy to assume that you're not gonna do anything to stop that? And I guess you got Dad trapped somewhere too?"

His eyes fell to the floor. "I'm sorry. This isn't the way I wanted things to turn out. But, I realize now that it must. I was wrong to go against prophecy."

I moved closer yet again, and thankfully this time he didn't back away. "What did they do to you, Cas? What did they do to make you side with them again?"

He couldn't meet my gazes, as he tried his best to focus on anything and everything in the room other than me.

"You're to wait here." He said instead of answering me. "Until it's over."

And with that he zapped away, and the only thing I could do was stand there shaking.

* * *

Castiel stepped into the room, finding Zachariah waiting for him

"Did you do it?" He asked.

"It's done." Castiel answered. "Dean and Mary won't be an issue."

"Good," Zachariah smiled. "But... I'm afraid I have new orders for you."

"New orders? You told me that after this was done that I..."

"Don't forget," Zachariah interrupted. "That if you don't do what you're told then you can count on Sam and Dean not surviving this, and you go back to heavens prison. If you think the last three weeks were bad," He snickered. "You ain't seen nothing yet."

Castiel had to force himself to not attack the bastard. "What are my new orders?"

"Mary," Zachariah replied, staring at the intricate painting on the wall. "She's... An issue. An issue that I don't want to deal with anymore. So. Your orders are to kill her."

Had Castiel been human he was certain the blood would have drained from his face.

"What?"

"You heard me. Mary needs to die. Think about it, Castiel- She's dangerous. She knows things that no one other than us should know. She's come back here and she started tinkering with prophecy, which," He shook his head. "As we all know, doesn't service us very well. The longer she remains _here_, the more trouble she's going to cause. We need to be rid of her."

"But... What does it matter if she knows of future events? You're still getting what you wanted, Sam is going to break the final seal, Lucifer will be released from his cage- The apocalypse is going to happen. Why does she have to die?"

Zachariah swung around quickly, the amusement on his face gone. "Because she's already caused enough trouble. If I hadn't of intervened with Sam then he would still be on the clean and sober path. I don't want to have to keep intervening when it's easier to take out the one that's causing the issues in the first place." He straightened and adjusted his suit jacket. "Now, go talk to Dean, because from what I hear he's causing an uproar, and then after that... Kill the girl."

Castiel couldn't move, he couldn't bring himself to even take a breath. A sudden stabbing pain erupted in his chest that he couldn't force away.

"I... I can't. I can't kill her." He muttered.

"You will! I'm giving you the option of giving her a merciful and quick death. If you don't do it, then she won't be so lucky. I'm imaginative, and very creative when it comes to torture, Castiel- You know that. Now imagine that being done to her. What would you rather have?"

The pain in his chest intensified, and he felt as though he was being tugged in two directions, his conscience was conflicting and shouting at him. He had no doubts that Zachariah would do horrible things to her, after all, he'd done that very thing to him. It filled him full of shame to think that it would be merciful to just kill her now, rather than letting her go through that.

He didn't know what to do. Normally he would consult in his friends, but that wasn't an option this time. He tried not to think about it and instead moved himself to where Dean was being held, finding him with a statue in hand and bashing it against the wall.

"Dean." He said, forcing the hunter to freeze.

"Cas?" Dean dropped the statue. "What the hell, man? What's goin on?"

"It's going to happen," Cas replied. "Sam's going to kill Lilith, and bring on the end of times."

"No," Dean shook his head. "No. What the fuck?! Are you crazy?! Why are we here then, why aren't we out there trying to stop him? Why are you..." He trailed off, the realization smacking him in the face. "You're in on this. They got to you... Didn't they?"

Cas swallowed hard. "You don't understand..."

"Where's Mary?" He asked now. "Is she ok?"

"Mary's fine, she's being held near here."

"Why are we separated? Why couldn't you have just tossed us here together? What's gonna happen to her?" When Cas didn't answer, yet again the realization smacked him in the face. "They're gonna kill her... Aren't they?"

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry?" He moved closer not hesitating for even a second to clock him in the jaw, which in turn made every finger in his hand feel as though they were smashed under a truck. "Dammit, Cas! What the hell is wrong with you?! You gotta know this is wrong, man! Why kill her? She's just a kid!"

"She's someone who's considered a threat, Dean. And because of that their solution is putting her to death."

"No," Dean cradled his hand, even though he was tempted to clobber the angel a second time. "This ain't right. You can't let her die, Cas... Please."

"I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do about it. If I don't do this..." He stopped, and bit his tongue.

"You?" Dean was taken aback. "_You're_ gonna kill her?"

"Those were my orders, yes. I don't have a choice. If I don't then Sam and yourself will be killed and things will end up considerably worse."

Dean began to pace back and forth. "Worse for who, huh? Your dick brothers? For their little plan of destroying the fucking planet?! You're a cold son of a bitch you know that? I thought you cared about her? How could you kill her?"

"You think I want this?" Cas spat back, the fury apparent in his voice. "You think I want to kill her, Dean? Of course I don't! But I know that if I don't then Zachariah will take matters into his own hands. She'll be tortured for what could be decades. Tortures so horrible it would make your time spent in hell seem like child's play in comparison. What other choice do I have?"

"How about door number fucking three you asshole! How about you snap outa whatever the fuck is goin on in that head of yours and help us! Do the right thing! You were our friend, you wanted to stop the apocalypse just as bad as we did! You wanted to help save lives!"

"What is so worth saving?" Cas returned. "All I see is pain and misery here! No joy, nothing but pain and darkness! Once the apocalypse is over all sins are forgiven, there will be peace. For everyone. Including yourself, and Sam."

"But no peace for Mary." Dean clenched his jaw. "You think I'm gonna have peace knowing you killed my kid? I won't have any fucking peace so you can shove it up your lily white ass. And you know, I'd rather take the blood, the pain, I'll take Sammy and all his issues and Mary's bullshit and bad attitude. I'd rather have that then be a Stepford wife in paradise!" Cas looked away and Dean grabbed his coat and jerked him back to facing him. "Think about this, Cas- There's a right and a wrong here and what you're doin is wrong!"

Cas' breath quickened. "What am I supposed to do? If I help you now, we'll all be hunted, we'll all be killed! They will still come after Mary and I'm only one angel, I wouldn't be able to stop them."

"So you'd rather be the one to kill her? You'd rather be the one that has to watch the life go outa her? How is that any better?" He yet again jerked him by the arm. "You care about her, I know you do. I'm begging you here... Please, please don't do this... Help us. Help _her_."

Cas couldn't meet his friends eyes, and felt himself start to fidget on his feet. Without saying anything in return he simply zapped away.

"Dammit!" Dean shouted, grabbing a chair and throwing it across the room.

He pulled his phone from his pocket, surprised to see he had a signal and quickly dialed Mary's number but it went straight to voice mail.

"Dammit," He repeated. "Don't do this, Cas. Please don't do this."

* * *

I was sure the dick angels wouldn't be happy with what I'd done to their pretty room. Every statue had been busted, the paintings on the walls were shredded, and I tore apart a platter of burgers on the table scattering the mess everywhere. Kind of childish maybe, it's like leaving your puppy home alone and coming back to find he'd chewed apart your sofa. But hey, that's what happens when I'm pissed. Things get fucked up.

I'd been stuck in this room for over an hour, and no matter how much I tried to bust out it was impossible. I tried calling Dad, it went to voice mail. I tried screaming for help and received no answer. Finally, I decided to just sit down and wait it out, because what else could I do? I was trapped like a fucking rat.

The worst part of it all was knowing that Cas was in on this. Knowing that he was just turning his back to Sam killing Lilith and letting the devil out. Deep down I knew it wasn't Cas' fault, he must've been tortured beyond your worst nightmares, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't pissed at him still. Pissed and hurt.

When he zapped back into the room after two hours, I didn't bother standing from the chair I sat in. Instead, I crossed one leg over the other, rested my head on one hand and glared at him.

"So did he do it?" I asked. "Did he kill Lilith yet?"

He didn't answer and instead I saw an angel blade slide out of his coat sleeve. Instantly I jumped to my feet.

"What's going on?" He didn't answer yet again, and instead anxiously stared down at the blade in his hand. "Cas... Tell me what you're doing."

He didn't speak and instead stomped over to me, raising a finger and pressing it against my lips to silence me. Once he realized I wasn't going to speak he moved his hand to my shoulder and zapped us out of the room. Once I got my bearings I noticed we were standing in another elegantly decorated room, and Dad was leaning over the table. Cas quickly stomped to him, grabbing him and shoving him against the wall covering his mouth with his hand.

Dad was surprised of course, but once he saw the look in Cas' eyes he gave a silent nod of understanding. Cas released him afterwards and Dad rushed over and pulled me into a hug. It surprised me at first, mainly because he never hugged me in this time, so I took advantage of it and squeezed him back. There was only one reason why Dad would do that, I'd seen that frantic look in his eyes before. He thought I was gonna die, which meant... Cas was probably ordered to kill me.

When he finally let me go Cas had already begun drawing a sigil on the wall with his own blood. Just as he was getting it finished I heard another flutter of wings.

"Castiel!" Zachariah shouted, and Cas didn't even pass him a glance. "What in the hell are you doing?!"

He didn't answer of course and instead slammed his palm against the sigil and Zachariah was zapped away with a shriek.

"We don't have much time," Cas said, turning to Dad and I. "We need to get to Sam."

"Where is he?" Dad replied. "Just send us there."

"I don't know where he is, but I know someone who does." He then laid his hands on both Dad's and my shoulder and for what felt like the billionth time we were zapped away.

Everything was so rushed as I realized that we were standing in Chuck's living room. He was on the phone and didn't notice us right off until he turned around and practically jumped out of his socks.

"What are... What are you guys doing here?" He asked.

"We need you to tell us where Sam is." Cas answered. "Where's the final seal going to be broken?"

Chuck swallowed a few times over before reaching to his desk and grabbing a few printed out pages of his book. "Uh," He mumbled. "It's an old convent, Saint Mary's," He looked at me. "Ironically enough... But, yeah... That's where it's happening, in Maryland. Within the next ten minutes. But I don't get it, why are you guys here? This isn't part of the story? I didn't write this?"

Cas looked to Dad and I. "Well, we're making it up as we go."

When the house suddenly started shaking and rattling, and a bright white light practically blasted through the windows Chuck started shouting. "God not again!"

"It's the archangel!" Cas shouted through the noise. "You go, I'll hold him off, I'll hold them all off!"

I quickly grabbed his jacket before he could zap us away. "No, you can't stay here Cas you gotta get outa here! Remember when I told you you died? This is one of those times. If you stay, you die. You need to get the fuck out."

"She's right, Cas!" Chuck shouted as well. "If you stay here Raphael will kill you!"

Cas didn't seem to know what to do, but then after only a few seconds of thinking it through, nodded.

"Alright, I'll send Dean and yourself to the convent, I'll meet with you later. Go, and be quick." He said, then laid his hand on mine and Dad's forehead.

The ruckus was replaced with complete silence, which to me was more unnerving then knowing an archangel was coming to blast our asses. Dad and me were standing in a dark corridor, lined with dingy cracked angel statues. At the end of the corridor was an open door and we both could clearly see Sam and Ruby standing inside the room. Dad grabbed my arm and pulled me with him towards it but Ruby must've sensed us coming. She turned slightly, gave a wicked smirk and raised her hand slamming the doors in our faces.

No matter how much we pounded on them or tried to pry them open they wouldn't budge. The only thing we could do was stand there and scream and plead for Sam to hear us, to stop what he was about to do. It didn't do any good. I could hear a woman screaming from inside the room and it was blood curdling. It was the scream of someone who was in agonizing pain, someone who was dying.

I pounded even harder on the doors until I could feel splinters digging into my skin and blood seeped out. I screamed until my throat felt raw and no sound would come out anymore. Dad as well was screaming just as much, but it was pointless. In minutes everything went completely silent inside the room and we continued to rattle the doors which was now starting to buckle. Once we finally managed to force them open Dad didn't hesitate to pull out his knife and stomp right towards Ruby.

"You're too late," She said, smiling. "He's free."

"I don't care!" Dad barked back.

Sam was on the floor when we walked in, but once he saw Dad coming for Ruby he jumped up and grabbed her from behind. In one quick swoop Dad jammed the knife into her stomach and gave it a nice twist. She couldn't even scream from the surprise of it all, and I think all three of us got way too much pleasure out of watching the bitch die.

Once she was gone her body hit the floor with a thump and Sam stumbled backwards grasping at his head.

"Ugh, what the hell happened?" He said as Dad caught him. "I don't even remember getting here..." He looked past me and to a stream of blood that was slowly forming a large circle. "Oh god... I killed her... Didn't I? I killed Lilith?"

Dad's expression was enough to shatter glass. "It wasn't your fault, Sam. Zachariah got to you."

But that didn't make Sam feel any better as he slowly inched his way closer to the stream of blood that was still moving across the floor.

"Oh god..." Sam muttered. "He's coming... What are we gonna do?"

"We need to leave." I said. "We need to get outa here before he breaks out. Remember, Sam- You're supposed to be his vessel."

The circle formed completely now and afterwards a horrific howling started to rumble the building as a bright light shot up from the center. Dad grabbed Sam and me and pulled us towards the doors but they slammed shut. Just as before they wouldn't budge no matter how much we pounded on them, and the light grew brighter and the hissing howl louder. It got to the point we all couldn't stand it anymore and clamped our hands over our ears. Just when I figured the building was going to collapse on top of our heads suddenly the light and howling stopped as everything went silent.

When my eyes opened I was sitting next to Dad and Sam on an airplane, and I know I wasn't the only one that was surprised by it. We only looked at each other in confusion, not saying a word as the pilot started speaking over the intercom. Apparently we were flying over the city we were just in and Dad looked to Sam and me and tried to blink away the confusion.

"Weren't we just there? Or am I drunk?" He asked.

"I wish I was drunk right about now." Was my reply.

Sam was silent, and who knows what was going through his head right then. When a burst of white light shot up from the ground the plane suddenly shifted, alarms started ringing and the oxygen masks fell from their compartments. Dad grabbed one and shoved it on my face before grabbing his own, and as we both stared out the plane window at the light that was blindingly bright, the only thing I could think was that we were all screwed.

I came back here because I wanted to help but as it turns out I didn't change a damn thing.


	20. Chapter 20

After we landed and were back on the road in a rental car, Dad flicked through the radio stations and all of them were news broadcasts on what they thought was a terrorist attack on the old convent. Apparently the place was completely leveled after Lucifer broke out, leaving nothing behind but a steaming pile of rubble. Of course peoples thoughts would be it was a bombing of some kind, no one would ever actually stop and think it was the frickin devil getting out of his cage. Who would? To normal people something like that sounded completely insane.

Not only were people talking about the supposed bombing, but a shit ton of other things was going on all at once around the country. The starting of the apocalypse of course, and it was hard to believe that one second everything could be as well as expected, and then the next we were facing the end of the world.

Sam didn't say anything as we drove for the next four hours, which wasn't all that surprising. Dad didn't either really, he only stated that he wanted to get as far from the convent as possible. But he was running on empty, everyone was exhausted mentally and physically and the only thing I wanted to do was crawl into a corner and cry.

I guess I was a big fucking idiot thinking I could come back here and actually change things. It was stupid of me to believe that just one person could alter a timeline that had pretty much been set in stone. This had been predicted for centuries, and yeah maybe it didn't go according to plan but it happened anyway. Sam had kicked the demon blood but it didn't matter, Zachariah got hold of him and changed everything to fall back in their favor. So yeah, maybe the details were a little different than what I knew, but it still happened. Lucifer still got out.

I couldn't help but wonder if it was still gonna be like that. Different roads taken but still ending up with the same result. Instead of so and so doing _this _they did _that_.

Dad drove until dawn when he finally decided to pull over at some rinky dink motel just outside of a small town in West Virgina. I felt like death warmed over and it was all I could do to fall into the room and throw my bag down. Honestly I just wanted to sleep, sleep for hours, but my mind wouldn't stop racing. Dad didn't hesitate to crack open a beer he'd bought from a gas station on the way there, Sam locked himself in the bathroom.

When I heard a flapping of wings I turned quickly to see Cas standing in the room. I didn't even give him a chance to say anything, I pretty much tackled him with a hug. He grunted from the impact and I just knew he was looking at Dad expecting him to tackle him as well, only not with a hug- But more along the lines of a fist in the face. Still he actually hugged me back.

"Well, I guess you made it outa Chuck's ok." Dad said, and when I pulled away he was giving me a peculiar look.

Cas cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes, it was a close call, but I managed to avoid Raphael." He glanced around the room as his eyes settled on the closed bathroom door. "I'm sorry that you couldn't stop it. And I'm sorry that I contributed to the failure. If I hadn't of..."

"Yeah well, ya did." Dad interrupted. "But at least you tried to help us out in the end, so..." He sat down. "What do we do now?"

"I wish I had answers to give," He replied. "But, for the moment all I can say is to avoid Zachariah, and of course Lucifer."

Dad rolled his eyes. "Yeah cause that's just gonna be so easy, Cas. Zach's always been able to find us, you've always been able to find us, can't exactly hide out in plain site."

Sam finally decided to leave the bathroom, but he didn't say anything even after noticing Cas in the room.

"Sam," Cas said, sighing. "This wasn't your fault. It was Zachariah's."

"Yeah, well," Sam grabbed a beer now. "That doesn't really make me feel any better, Cas. I'm still the one that did this. I'm still the one that killed Lilith and let him out."

"So if you have a plan other than running away from Zach and Lucifer," Dad held out his arms. "We're all ears."

"First thing's first." Cas said, then since I was closest he laid his hand on my chest. There was a shooting pain for a few fleeting seconds before fading away, and already I knew what he did.

He moved to Dad and Sam and did the same thing to them only they didn't respond to it as kindly as I did.

"What the fuck was that?" Dad breathed out after the pain subsided.

"They're enochian sigils, it will hide you from every angel in creation- Including Lucifer. If you're going to avoid them then this is the best way to start." Cas answered.

"What did you do? Brand us with them?" Sam asked.

"No, I carved them into your ribs." Cas then moved across the room and glanced out the window. "For the moment you're safe, but that won't last long. Lucifer is circling another vessel and once he touches down things are going to be far worse than they are now."

"Another vessel?" Sam suddenly perked up. "So... He won't come after me?"

"Yes, he will. This vessel is just an improvisation. He's not nearly as strong as you would be. Honestly it's foolish for him to even attempt to possess this man. He'll only last a short while before he completely dissolves."

"Dissolves?" Dad was taken aback. "They can actually do that?"

"Yes," Cas sat down now, but didn't look at all relaxed. "It all stems down to certain blood lines. Some are strong, others not so much. An angel can't simply jump into any human they want, which is why it took me so long in the beginning to come into contact with you. I had to track down someone that wouldn't explode once I possessed them."

And seeing is that Cas still had the same vessel decades after this moment, obviously he picked the right one. I didn't know much about the guy actually, only that his name was Jimmy and he had a wife and daughter, and gave them up to protect them.

Suddenly I felt my brows furrow. I remembered a story Dad had told me, about how Cas got pulled back to heaven and left his vessel behind. There was a whole ordeal that came after that, Jimmy nearly getting killed and his wife being possessed then kidnapping their daughter. That happened before Lucifer was let out of his cage, and _after_ the moment I jetted back in time. But... It didn't happen. Did I actually prevent that moment, did I actually change something?

"What're you gonna do now, Cas?" Dad asked, breaking through my thoughts.

"Before I was cut off from heaven I heard the angels mention something about the Michael sword, so I thought I would ask Mary if she'd heard of it." He answered, directing his attention to me.

I snapped out of it once hearing my name. "Michael sword?"

He nodded. "Yes, did Dean mention it to you in the future?"

I sat on the edge of the bed and shrugged. "Uh, no he didn't say anything about a sword. The only thing he said was that he was supposed to be Michael's vessel."

Cas let out a disappointed sigh. "Then that's what they were referring to. I thought it was impossible for their to be an actual blade, but..."

"There might be," I interrupted. "I can't give details but I know of a lot of weapons out there that you guys haven't even heard of yet. Crazy powerful weapons."

"And where are they?" Dad asked.

"Uh... Well, I can't really say and besides the place is locked up and there's no way to get in without a key."

Sam finally had an interest in the conversation. "Would this happen to be the place we were at in your pictures?"

Instead of letting me answer Dad grabbed my bag and started sifting through it until pulling out my pictures. He held up the Christmas photo of Cas decorated in tinsel.

"What is this place, Mary? We're obviously living there and it sure as hell don't look like our usual skeevy motels or a normal house." He waved the picture in front of my face before Cas snatched it from his grasp and eyed it.

"I can't talk about it. Not yet. Like I said there's no way to get into it right now and if I talked about it and someone overheard, we'd be majorly fucked." I replied.

"We're majorly fucked now, kid." He went on. "If there's some way we can get into this place..."

"Trust me," I shook my head. "You can't. This isn't some regular old door you can pick the lock on, Dad. This place is impenetrable. Like Fort Knox impenetrable."

"Maybe I could get inside," Cas offered. "It shouldn't be an issue for an angel."

"It is. It's warded against everything supernatural. Consider it a place that has a force field around it that stretches for miles. Nothing evil can detect it or find it."

Sam snorted out a laugh. "Why the hell aren't we trying to get into this place then? If it's that safe then it would be perfect."

I grumbled and rubbed my head. "You're getting off the subject. Like I was saying, yeah there might be something called a Michael sword, but if there is, it's locked up in this place we _can't _get in to."

"And there's no way at all that we can get in there?" Dad asked. "No way at all?"

"Not without the key."

"And," Sam shrugged. "Who has the key?"

I took my head in my hands, then peaked through my fingers at Cas sitting at the table.

"He does."

Cas' eyes squinted. "Me? You mean in the future?"

"Yeah."

"Awesome," Dad looked like he wanted to do a little jig. "So call him up, get his ass back here and have him give us that damn key. We're gonna need all the help we can get, and if this super secret place has weapons, we'll need em."

Cas immediately stood. "I'll retrieve the ingredients for the spell, it might take me a while. Since I'm cut off from heaven there's limitations to what I can do. Especially if I run into trouble."

I barely had the chance to squeak out a response before he zapped away. Great, just great. This wasn't gonna work. They weren't supposed to know about the Men of Letters bunker yet. That wasn't supposed to happen until several years down the line. So, either I just fucked us over even more, or... Well I didn't see a positive outcome to this one.

* * *

That night was nothing but a blur. I remembered sneaking out when Dad and Sam were sleeping, I remember walking a few blocks down the street and going into a bar. I remember having one drink, then two, then three- Then after that things started to turn hazy. It was just bits and pieces after that. Like stumbling out of the bar and trying to make my way back to the motel, some guy stopping me and offering me a ride which I refused. Then, I remember beating that man bloody in an alleyway after he jumped me. After that everything went dark. All I know is that I needed to get out by myself, spend some quiet time reflecting on how I'd failed already in what I'd set out to do.

Yeah, I blamed myself of course. What can I say, I was my Dad's daughter. I took after him with more than just the looks. If something went wrong I'd beat myself up over it until I was stuck in a drunken stupor and beating up random guys in alleys- Then completely blacking out and who the hell knows what happened next. All the years Dad spent trying to keep me from drinking, but little did he know that I was just as bad as he was. In so many more ways than one.

* * *

"Where the fuck would she have gone?!" Dean shouted as he scrambled all over the motel room. "When did she leave?"

"How the hell should I know, Dean?" Sam snapped back. "I was asleep, just like you were."

"Dean, if you calm down I'm sure we can find her." Cas said. "She couldn't have gone far."

"Yeah and you just had to go and scribble on her ribs now of all times." Dean replied, grabbing his jacket. "You'd be able to zap her back here if you didn't."

"It was a safety measure," Cas scowled. "I'm certain that you'd rather her leave on her own accord than her being abducted by angels, correct?"

Dean stopped before hitting the door. "She left her phone but took her jacket, so we know she wasn't abducted. But that still don't mean she's not in danger."

Sam grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him back to the table. "Ok, calm down. We're gonna find her. But you and Cas need to stay here and do the spell, right? The sooner you can contact the _other _Cas, the sooner we can get to a place that's safe."

"So I'm just supposed to sit here on my ass while Mary's out there doing who the hell knows what?" Dean barked.

"Yeah. I can find her, Dean. You stay here and do the spell." Sam grabbed his jacket and the car keys and started for the door, as soon as he opened it he stopped dead in his tracks and arched both brows. "Uh... Found her."

Cas and Dean rushed to the door, both stopping with the same expression Sam held. Surprise.

Mary was sitting in the hallway propped against the wall, completely passed out.

"What the fuck?" Dean said, then knelt down in front of her and shook her by the shoulder. "Mary. Wake up." When her head slightly fell to the side he went stiff at noticing a bruise on her jaw. "Shit... She's been in a fight. And she smells like a damn brewery."

Sam and Cas joined him by crouching down. Cas grabbed her wrist and exposed her hands. "Her knuckles are scraped and covered in blood."

"Looks like she pounded the crap outa someone." Sam stated. "Let's get her inside before she starts throwing up in the hall."

Dean scooped her up and carried her into the room, laying her on one of the beds. After he grabbed the first aid kit from his bag he shoved it into Cas' hands.

"Take care of her, I'm gonna go find out what the fuck happened out there." He said.

"Wait a second, Dean." Sam grabbed him yet again. "I think you need to be here when she wakes up instead of going out there to kick the crap out of some guy."

"He beat the shit outa my kid, Sam." Dean retorted. "You comin with me or not?"

Sam rolled his eyes and followed his brother to the door, stopping before leaving and turning to Cas.

"Watch her." He said, then slammed the door behind him.


	21. Chapter 21

I was becoming all too familiar with the bottom of the toilet bowl since I'd puked my guts up in it about five times now. If that wasn't bad enough my skull felt like it was split in two, and I was seeing quadruple. Ugh, this was my punishment for getting completely shitfaced the night before. Yeah, I was a genius.

"Mary?" Cas called out, knocking on the door for the millionth time in a row. "Are you alright?"

I groaned as I rubbed my head. "Yeah," I replied weakly. "Be out in a second."

He must've took that as a positive response because he finally stopped knocking. After flushing the toilet a good ten times over and brushing my teeth, I finally hobbled my way out while trying to block my eyes from the light.

Being awake was a curse right about now, so I fell back onto the bed and seemed to only then notice that Dad and Sam were gone.

"Where are they?" I asked, smashing my face into the pillow.

"They... Went out." He replied. "For breakfast I believe."

"Yeah right." I rolled over and forced myself to sit up. "You're a terrible liar."

"My apologies," He said sarcastically. "I haven't mastered the art of deceit just yet. I've only just recently fallen."

That made me snicker as he sat down beside me with a first aid kit in hand. "Keep hanging around us and we'll turn you into a regular smart ass." He didn't respond to that and instead pulled out some antiseptic and bandages. "Okay, so... I know you're dying to ask, so just get it over with."

He still said nothing as he grabbed my hand and started blotting the antiseptic on my busted knuckles. At least he said nothing for a good thirty seconds.

"If you want to tell me what happened then you can. But I'm not going to pry." He moved his eyes to mine. "I might not know you as well as you know myself, but from what I've seen so far this doesn't seem like something you would do."

I shrugged. "Well, you're right. You don't know me very well."

"Do you want to explain why you did whatever you did last night?"

But would he understand? Probably not.

"I dunno. I guess I was just thinking about how I failed. I came back here to help and couldn't. It still happened. It's scary as hell knowing that if I don't somehow fix things, then everything that happened to Dad and Sam is still gonna happen."

He nodded as he started wrapping gauze around my knuckles. "You're wrong, you know? You did change things."

"Psh," I snorted. "How? Last I checked, the world's still fucked up and Lucifer got out."

"No you're right about that. Lucifer was still released and the world is on the brink of destruction," He said and I rolled my eyes. Yeah real good way to make a chick feel better. "But you did change things. You managed to persuade Sam to stop drinking demon blood and set him on the right path."

"Hell of a lotta good it did."

"But if you can manage to do that, with only being here a short time- Then think of what you can accomplish the longer you're here. Tell me, what happened the first time when Sam drank the demon blood?"

"What do you mean?"

"The aftermath, other than Lucifer being released, what happened?"

I thought that over for a moment, trying to recall everything Dad told me. "Well... Dad and Sam had a falling out after it was all over and done with. They went their own ways for a while actually. And, I think that even years after Dad never really could one hundred percent trust Sam again."

He nodded, giving a faint smile. "And wouldn't you say that so far, they don't seem to be having any disagreements? They're together right now trying to find out what happened to you last night. And not only that, you said that I was going to die in Chuck's house the night Lucifer was released, and I didn't. So while things might not have ended up exactly to your liking, you did manage to change the timeline a little. You might consider it to be miniscule in comparison to what you would have rather had happen, but you've only just arrived here. There's plenty of time to do more."

Somehow I smiled back at him. "Since when did you become a therapist?"

His brow arched. "I'm only stating the truth, Mary."

"Okay, so since we're stating the truth right now, answer me this... What made you change your mind?"

After sitting back he cocked his head to the side. "Change my mind about what?"

"You were gonna kill me, right? Zachariah ordered you to kill me, so why didn't you?"

Swallowing hard, he looked away. "Dean told you?"

"No," I shook my head, regretting it after a dizzy spell hit me. "It was kinda obvious, dude."

"After Zachariah gave me the order I knew I couldn't go through with it. It felt so unbelievably wrong. But I knew that if I didn't at least pretend that I was going to do it then I would never be able to get Dean and yourself out of there. So, I made Dean believe I was going to do it, which of course set him off. I knew that if Dean were angry or upset over the matter then Zachariah wouldn't suspect what I was about to do. So in answer to your question I didn't change my mind, Mary. I never intended to kill you in the first place." His eyes softened slightly. "But I suppose I caused enough damage despite that. If I hadn't of allowed them to persuade me..."

"It's not like you just changed your mind, Cas." I cut him off. "I don't even wanna know what they did to you to make you go back with them."

His grip tightened on the first aid kit. "It's over and done with now. I can't change it. The only thing I might be able to do to atone for my mistake is help all of you as much as I can now."

I fell silent and only watched as he finished with my bandages.

"If I hadn't of been cut off from heaven then it would have been simple to just heal your wounds. But I suppose this is what needs to happen in order to do what's right."

"I'm sorry." I sighed. "I know this can't be easy."

"I'm hoping that contacting myself in the future again will serve some purpose. This place that you spoke of, the place in the photograph, what is it?"

Well I guess if I wanted to really _really_ change things then maybe telling them about the bunker wouldn't be so bad.

"It's a... Well, a bunker." I answered.

"A... bunker? What sort of bunker?"

I shifted uncomfortably, this subject was making me antsy. Which of course made me wonder if maybe that was a sign I shouldn't be talking about it? But I really wasn't the type of chick that believed in "signs".

"It's from a group called the Men of Letters. They basically went extinct a long ass time ago, but these guys were geniuses and had a heck of a lot of knowledge when it comes to anything supernatural. Dad and Sam were what was considered "Legacies". Their Grandpa was a Man of Letters. Anyway, this place is in Kansas and it has thousands upon thousands of documents on any kind of monster out there, along with a collection of weapons that haven't been seen in centuries."

He absorbed what I had told him as his brows squeezed together. "If this place is as powerful as you claim then I believe it would be beneficial if we went there. It could help us immensely in any upcoming battles."

"Yeah, probably. Hell, maybe I should've mentioned it a long time ago, huh? Maybe Lucifer wouldn't have ended up breaking out."

He laid the first aid kit aside. "There's no sense dwelling on what might have happened, Mary. Instead you should focus on what's to come."

I sat back, pouting. "Stop being so damn insightful all the time and let me have my mope fest."

Thankfully he knew I was joking with him and gave a slight smile. When the motel door opened and Dad and Sam walked in, Cas finally stood from the edge of the bed.

"So, guess what we found out?" Dad asked, as he stomped in and threw his jacket on the table. "We were just drivin around minding our own business when we came across a crime scene. Yellow tape, cop cars, the works. They were blocking off an alley next to O'Hara's Pub a few blocks down the street." When he noticed my blank expression his brows rose. "Turns out some guy got his head bashed in and now is in a coma at Saint Elizabeth hospital. They said the attacker was what looked like a young teenage boy."

I scowled and tugged on the blankets. "I wish people would stop fucking thinkin I'm a teenage boy. Boys don't have boobs!"

Dad pointed sarcastically to his head. "It's the hair. So... What the hell happened, Mary?"

All three men glared at me and I was suddenly very aware of how this must've looked. My busted up knuckles and blood splatter on my shirt. It was very incriminating.

"I had too much to drink last night, and as I was walkin back some weirdo freak job jumped me in the alley. I fought him off." I answered.

Dad's face went blank. "Jumped you? Like... _Jumped _you?"

"Yeah it's what it sounds like."

"Son of a bitch..." Dad shook his head. "Well, good thing that asshole's in a coma or else I'd kick his ass."

"You sure you're okay, Mary?" Sam asked, giving me his usual puppy dog eyes.

"I'll live, obviously he got the worst part of the deal."

Sam then laid a fast food bag on the nightstand beside me. "Greasy breakfast. It'll take care of that hangover."

I smiled in thanks and even though I felt like puking another fifty times over dug into the grease soaked glob of something.

"So are we doin this spell or what?" Dad asked, motioning towards the ingredients on the table. "Would like to get this over with so we can go somewhere friggin safe."

Cas nodded, but then shifted his eyes to me. "Should she be present for it?"

"Why not?" I retorted with my mouthful. "If anyone will be able to convince you to give the key it'd be me."

"She might be right," Sam shrugged. "She knows future you, we don't."

Dad didn't argue so Cas relented and started mixing the ingredients. I finally pulled myself off the bed and tried to not look like a half dead drunk because I knew what my Cas would do once he saw me. Once the spell was over we waited a good minute or so before I felt a presence standing behind me. Really, I didn't think this would feel so weird, seeing my Cas again. I mean, why would it? It's not like we were strangers- But still that nervous knot in my stomach was there.

When he rounded the side of the bed his eyes were fixed on me and no one else. I'd like to say he looked happy to see me, but I knew that probably wasn't the case.

"What's this about?" He asked, finally looking to Dad and Sam. "You do realize that I can't come back here every time you stub your toes, right? It's dangerous."

Dad opened his mouth to respond but I quickly chimed in. "We need to talk alone." He squinted his eyes at me, and I couldn't help but look over at the other Cas and suddenly my head felt like it was going to explode. "Okay, this isn't awkward at all."

"What is it, Mary? If you want to talk alone then..." My Cas suddenly stopped as he tilted his head slightly noticing the bruise on my jaw. "What happened?" He moved closer and pushed my chin up gently. "How did this happen?"

"I ran into a door." I said, feeling the awkwardness intensify as everyone gawked at us. "Let's go talk, okay?"

I grabbed his hand and pulled him out the door with me before anyone could speak, down the stairs and outside to the street. Just as when Crowley came back to talk to me, Dad, Sam and Cas were watching from the window. Only this situation was a million times more weird, mainly because there were _two_ Cas' and I didn't know how to frickin act.

"You ran into a door?" He said, shaking his head at me. "You expect me to believe that?"

"It doesn't matter what happened. I'm a Hunter, and with having that job you know sometimes it can get a little rough. But we didn't ask you to come back here to talk about my bruised up face- We need a favor." I replied and I couldn't help but notice his jaw clench. "You're still pissed at me, aren't you?"

He glanced over his shoulder to them watching us from the window. "Did you tell them?"

"Nope. Didn't see much point in it, and you didn't answer my question. Are you still pissed at me?"

He leaned against a random car parked in front of the motel. "I was never angry at you for what you did, Mary. No matter how stupid and reckless it was. Instead, I was devastated."

I rubbed my temples and started pacing. "Please don't say that."

"You wanted me to answer your question, and I did. What do you expect me to say?" He paused and I could feel his eyes burning into me. "You sold your soul, how was I supposed to feel?"

"For Dad and Sam!" I snapped back. "Not for something stupid like money or fame, I did it for them! And they came back and everything was fine until you blabbed and told him!"

Alright, well... It's out now. Yeah I sold my soul. A few months after Dad and Sam died I managed to get out of the bunker and make it to a crossroads. I made a deal. The usual ten years for what I wanted in return, which was my Dad and Uncle back as good as new. I got what I wanted and they were brought back. In the heat of the moment I never considered what Cas might've done once he noticed Dad and Sam had miraculously come back from the dead. Of course he'd blab to Dad what I did.

Once he found out he went ballistic and started searching for a way to get me out of his deal. Of course there was no way so he stooped to drastic measures which was consulting in Crowley. He said that there wasn't a way for me to get out of the deal, and the only thing he could think of to save my stupid ass was to send me back to 2009. Because if I wasn't in my own time, once the ten years were up it'd be a little impossible for them to drag me to hell. I had already discussed coming back with Cas before Dad and Sam were brought back. I was convinced I could change things, he didn't want to do it. But after my soul was sold he had no choice but to send me back.

"I told him," Cas interrupted my thoughts. "Because he asked me what happened. He knew that Sam had shot him and it was a fatal wound. He wasn't stupid, Mary- He would have figured it out on his own even if I hadn't told him. And I'm not sorry that I did, because you're here now and there's no chance of you going to hell if you're here."

"Whatever," I shook my head, glancing up at the window to the men standing there, my heart instantly dropped to my stomach. "Fuck, they can hear everything we're saying."

"No they can't. I'm smarter than that." He replied. "Your secret is still a secret, but I think we both know it won't be for much longer, so... Just get to the favor you wanted to ask of me."

"It's, uh..." I paused to clear my throat, hoping he wouldn't notice I was about to cry. I hated when he was mad at me, and I especially hated knowing that I hurt him. "It's about the bunker. We kinda need the key to the door."

I didn't have to look at him to know he was glowering at me. He was good at that.

"I was wondering when this would come up. I was prepared for it." He said. "It's not as simple as handing over the key, Mary. You know that. If I gave you this one..."

"I know, you guys wouldn't be able to get back in... Which means you would need to make another trip."

He nodded. "Back to Henry Winchesters timeline, yes. I would need to get into their building and take the key there. Should be simple enough, they wouldn't see me coming."

"But?"

"No buts," He shrugged. "I'm only thinking of your safety after all, and you would be safest there."

"So you'll do it?"

He reached over and grabbed my hand. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"I dunno. I hate asking you. I never liked asking you for things. Especially now." I shook it off. "So how are they doing? Dad and Sam?"

He pulled me closer and didn't answer the way I figured he would. "It's not the same without you there, Mary. It's far too quiet in the bunker now. Half the time I don't think your Father knows what to do without you there to reprimand. I think he's bored."

I glanced up at the window and this Dad staring at me. "And, I'm causing trouble for this one. I know it's a long shot, but... Has anything at all changed since I left?"

"You haven't been here long enough to drastically alter anything yet. It's going to take years if you can accomplish anything."

"I know you lied to me." I retorted. "I know you said that I can't change anything, but you know me. I'm stubborn as hell and I'm still gonna try."

"Well if anyone could do it, it would be you." He sighed and released my hand. "I need to get started on retrieving the key. I'll return when I can."

He zapped away seconds later and I finally returned to the motel room. My Cas wasn't very happy with me for obvious reasons. I did exactly what my Dad did after Sam was killed. I rushed out without thinking and sold my soul so they'd be brought back. Yeah they were pissed at me, beyond pissed, but it was my choice to make. And I honestly didn't regret it for a second.

After I closed the door behind me Dad was the first to speak. "Well? How'd it go?"

"He's gonna get the key, it might take a while." I answered. "Am I the only one that's totally wiggin out from all this time travel crap and having two Cas' here at once?"

"Nope," Sam replied. "Sometimes I can't believe this is actually reality."

Already I could see Dad eyeballing me strangely, and I just waited for him to start barking out questions. But he didn't, instead he turned and sat at the table and started staring out the window. I knew what that meant, we'd had a few Father Daughter talks in the future and they always started with the look he had right then. It said that he wanted to grill me about a certain subject, but didn't wanna do it in front of anyone else. So when he suddenly announced he wanted to take a drive and wanted me to come with him, I prepared myself for an interrogation.

We still had the rental car since the Impala was still, I was assuming, at the gas station we were at before we got zapped into the fancy rooms. So we started down the street and didn't make it two blocks before he started in.

"You know what I think's funny?" He said. "First Crowley came back to talk to you and you got in a fight with him, or at least a shouting match, then future Cas comes back and then you have a shouting match with him. What's up with that?"

"What can I say?" I sneered. "Everyone loves me."

"Cut the crap, kid. You think I can't see that you were freakin out when both of em came back here? Like you were afraid they'd say somethin you didn't want us to hear?" He glared at me before returning his eyes to the road. "You were the one doin all the yelling, so what is it you're afraid they'll tell us?"

"Nothin," I snapped back. "Just leave it alone, Dad."

"Oh, now you gotta know I'm not leavin it alone. Not after _that _tone." He paused and we both had the same confused expression after hearing how "Fatherly" that sounded. "What'd you do that's _that _bad, huh?"

"Nothing. It's not important and it certainly doesn't matter here."

"Here?" He pulled the car over and I flashed back to the future and the times he'd take me on a drive and pull over to yell at me for something stupid I'd done. The one thing he never wanted to do was embarrass me in front of Sam or Cas, which I was thankful for. "What do you mean it doesn't matter _here_?"

"It's what it sounds like. It doesn't matter here in this time."

"But it obviously matters in _yours_." He shifted in the seat until he was facing me. "You can tell me, Mary... What'd you do?"

I couldn't look at him, and I certainly couldn't tell him the truth. I wouldn't want to see that look in his eyes again. I saw it once already after he found out I'd sold my soul. It was a pain and disappointment so horrible that it practically ripped me to shreds. After Cas told him what I did he locked himself in his bedroom and started drinking again. He'd been sober for years, and I caused him to fall off the wagon.

"Please... Just drop it." I choked out, tears filling my eyes. "I can't talk about it."

"Why? Because you don't want to, or because you really can't?"

"I don't want to. There's no point. Like I said it doesn't matter here."

He sat back, and his eyes were about to shoot fire. "You gotta tell me about it sometime. I can tell it's something pretty damn bad or else you wouldn't be crying."

"All I'll say is... Is that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree."

His brows squeezed together after that statement. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Just as it sounds. You and me. We're more alike then you think."

Even though I didn't want him to know the truth, there was a part of me that did. Mainly because I wanted him to know how much I loved him and the extremes I'd actually go to for him. Of course, selling your soul and having a one way ticket to hell wasn't really something we could bond over, it would more then likely make Dad kick my ass.


	22. Chapter 22

Once we got back to the motel, thankfully Dad had dropped the subject of whatever I was keeping secret. After he parked the rental car he perked up and grinned.

"Finally!" He said. "Bobby's finally here with my baby."

"What?" I snapped my head around and noticed the Impala parked out front of the motel. "Bobby?"

"Yeah, he went and picked up the car where it got left behind."

He started to open the door and I reached over and latched onto his arm. "Wait... You can't go running back in there yet. That's not Bobby."

"What? What do you mean it's not Bobby?"

"I remember this... You told me about this... Bobby shows up after Lucifer broke out, but it's not Bobby. He's possessed. If it all plays out the way you told me, the demon gets ordered to kill you but he doesn't, Bobby takes control over his mind and stabs himself in the stomach. Because of that he's paralyzed and stuck in a wheelchair."

Dad's face went ashen and he shifted his eyes up to the motel room. "Okay, you sure about this?"

"Yeah, positive. The demon came here for some kind of information, and once he got it that's when he flips out and this other demon named Meg shows up with her buddies."

"Fuck..." He shook his head. "Meg... That bitch." Now he reached into his jacket and pulled out his flask. "Okay, follow my lead, kid."

I nodded and followed him from the car and back into the motel. We started up the stairs and made it to our room in a matter of seconds and already I could hear voices inside the room. It was Bobby and Sam, naturally- And Cas for the moment seemed to have zapped away somewhere.

Dad gave me a nod before opening the door and stepping inside, keeping his flask of holy water hidden underneath his jacket sleeve.

Bobby and Sam were sitting at the table, and once we entered the room Bobby flew to his feet.

"It's about damn time, boy." He said. "What kept ya?"

Yet again Dad looked at me, as though he was asking if I was sure I knew what I was talking about. The only thing I did was nod, and thankfully he believed me enough that he suddenly whipped the flask out and started flinging holy water in Bobby's face.

The demon inside of him instantly started screaming, and it only took Sam a few seconds to realize what the fuck was happening. He jumped up now and grabbed his own holy water and in a matter of thirty seconds both Dad and Sam were reciting the exorcism prayer while consistently throwing holy water on Bobby.

I stood in the background with my heart in my throat when the black smoke finally came shooting out of Bobby's mouth and he thumped to the floor afterwards.

Once it was quiet, Dad and Sam only stood there, before Sam looked at us and shook his head.

"How'd you know?" He asked. "I didn't even know."

Dad motioned towards me. "She knew, I guess I told her about this."

They both went to Bobby now who was groaning from the floor.

"You okay, Bobby?" Dad asked, lugging him to his feet.

"Shit..." Bobby croaked. "Yeah, I'll live. Damn demon jumped me halfway to West Virgina. I think my skull's split in two."

"Better than a knife in the gut." Dad replied. "According to what Mary said happened, you stab yourself to save me and end up gettin paralyzed."

Bobby then shifted his eyes to me, his face startled in surprise. "Damn... Guess I owe ya one, kid." He then moved over and pulled me into a tight bear hug which made me gasp in shock.

"Hate to ruin the Hallmark moment," Dad interrupted. "But Mary also said Meg is gonna show up, so we gotta get ready."

So we sprung into action, first starting with the simple salt lines around the windows. Sam painted a devils trap on the ceiling a few feet from the door, and that was pretty much all we could do to prepare for Meg to show up.

"Where'd Cas go?" I asked now that everything had calmed down.

"He went to check out that town in Kansas." Sam answered. "I don't know why, according to what you said he wouldn't be able to track down the bunker."

"Please, please don't tell me you talked about the bunker while Bobby was possessed?" I replied.

Sam smiled. "Don't worry, I didn't."

"Just what is this place?" Bobby asked now. "What bunker are you yammerin about?"

"We'll explain later." Dad answered. "In the mean time I think Cas should get his feathery ass back here and give us a hand with the bitch... Sorry, I mean Meg."

And that's what we did, we called Cas back and he returned within a matter of seconds- And all we could do after that was sit and wait. I was anxiously fidgeting in my seat, my palms were sweating so I wiped them on my jeans. Dad was just as anxious as myself and he had started pacing. Bobby and Sam sat at the table trying to act as normal as possible. Cas had put up warding sigils so any demons that might have been coming wouldn't detect his presence. So far my Cas hadn't come back from his trip to even further in the past, and I couldn't help but wonder what was taking him so long.

When this Cas suddenly stood up straight and made the motion for us to be quiet, we knew it was show time. He listened for a good ten seconds before nodding.

"You should act normally." He whispered.

So we did, and pretended to argue about something stupid that I barely paid attention to. Cas was positioned near the door, where he would be hidden behind it once it opened. And it didn't take long for the door to burst open and a short brunette to walk in. I never knew Meg, but from Dad's description of her I knew that's who she was. There was a cocky smirk stretched across her face, and Cas didn't even give her the chance to speak before he pounced.

I watched with my eyes wide as he laid his hand on her forehead and the life was snuffed out of her, she screamed in pain and once her body hit the floor there were gaping black holes where her eyes used to be. There were two men behind her, and once they caught site of Cas one immediately smoked out but the second didn't get the chance. Cas killed him too. Within a matter of seconds the entire ordeal was over and I looked to Dad and Sam, then Bobby, thanking whoever might've been listening that it didn't end up the way future Dad had told me. Bobby wasn't stabbed, he didn't wind up in a wheelchair, and a dangerous threat was taken out before she even got an opportunity to hurt my family. Like I said, I never knew Meg, but what I did know wasn't good. She had possessed Sam, tried to kill both Dad and him, tried to kill my Grandpa. Basically she caused trouble left and right.

And now she was gone, and Dad or Sam wouldn't have to worry about her. That was one threat I could check off the list.

"Hey," Dad said, nudging me. "You okay kid?"

I tore my eyes away from the bodies and nodded faintly. "Uh, yeah... I think so. It's just... This isn't the way it happened for you before. This is completely different."

"Well," Bobby chimed in. "I for one can say that I sure as hell don't mind this version."

"I should clean this up." Cas stated, then started zapping the bodies away. I never asked where he sent them, but knowing him it was probably the moon or something. "What do we do now that this is over?"

"One of the demons got away." Sam replied. "So, I'm sure we're gonna be dealing with crap caused from that."

"And... We need to wait for future you to get back with the key." Dad added. "Then after that. I say we head to Kansas."

Actually, now that I was thinking about it- I was pretty damn excited to go back to the bunker. It was my home. I grew up there. No, it might not have been a normal house with a swing set in the back yard, but I loved it there. I loved my room, I loved having a place to go back to that was consistent. Plus the bonus was how awesomely safe it was, and you could go to sleep at night and not have to worry about something creeping in and ripping you to shreds.

It took longer than I expected for my Cas to come back, but once he did I noticed right off that his shirt was torn and there was blood streaks as well.

"What happened?" I asked.

"It wasn't as simple as I thought it would be." He answered, then pulled the box from his pocket that held the key. "As it turns out... I couldn't retrieve it from Henry Winchester, so..."

"Wait, who?" Dad said, taken aback.

"No time for that now." Cas simply shoved the box into his hands. "Mary, a word?"

He didn't give me a chance to respond before grabbing my wrist and yanking me out the door with him. Instead of going back to the street we simply walked down the hallway a ways before he stopped.

"If you couldn't get it from Henry, then..."

"It's _our _key," He interrupted. "I had a discussion with Sam and Dean, and they agreed that you would have more use for the bunker then we would. They told me to give it to you."

"But..." I shook my head. "What the hell are they supposed to do? Now they're locked out of the bunker!"

He pushed his hand over my mouth to silence me. "We all have to make sacrifices, Mary. And this was their decision. There's going to be consequences for your actions, you have to understand that. This was your choice. You sold your soul, and you were sent back here, and because of that things aren't going to go the way you like. They're going to be fine. They lived their entire lives away from the bunker and they can do it again. But you," He finally pulled his hand away. "You have to stay safe, and your Father knows that the best place for you is your home. So go there, and stay out of trouble."

This wasn't the first time he laid on the guilt for what I did, so I moved my eyes to the blood streaks on his shirt. "What happened there?"

"The Men of Letters were highly knowledgeable in how to ward off an angel." He replied. "Luckily I was able to wipe their minds of the incident before I left, so at least they won't remember me."

"If you could do that then why couldn't you have grabbed the key."

"Because it was locked in a room warded against everything, including me. I couldn't get in." He stood tall. "I understand that you're not happy about the situation, Mary- But this was the only option. Take the key, go to the bunker and try to stay alive for the love of god... Please."

He pulled me into a tight hug which took me back to the good old days. It was always hard to not let myself melt right into his arms, and get lost in the euphoria that came from it. Other than Dad, Cas was the one solid and concrete thing I had in my life, the second person I could always count on. I missed having that. Yeah there was _this _Cas, here in this time- But it wasn't the same yet. And I didn't know if it ever would be. Yeah I'd kissed him once, and he didn't seem to be scared of me anymore. But sometimes I really needed... _This_. Just someone that was there to hug me if I was ever feeling like crap, or to console me when I was acting like a crazy irrational girl.

When he pulled away he kissed my forehead several times over before giving me one of his weak smiles.

"I have to go back now. I've been away long enough as it is. Be careful, Mary." He said.

"I will... Thank you, Cas. Watch out for Dad and Sam."

"Of course, just as always."

His eyes said he didn't want to leave, but he didn't have much of a choice, so after a quiet goodbye he disappeared. I lingered in the hallway for a few seconds before returning to the room.

"Everything cool?" Dad asked.

"Yeah," I nodded. "Everything's fine."

"Awesome, so... How bout we hit the road, huh?" He finished, waving the box with the bunker key in the air.

I smiled and practically wanted to dance out of the room.

"Hell yeah, let's go."

* * *

_In the not so distant future_

* * *

I watched the fire consume the pyres in front of me. Dad and Sam's final resting place. A Hunters send off that they always requested should the time come that they ended up... Dying.

This was too hard to believe, and really I should've expected it. It's not like Dad or Sam were young men anymore. But, I expected their deaths to be normal, peaceful, not something like this. I had always pictured Dad going quietly in his sleep, Sam the same way. I never would have thought that Dad would have been taken away from me because of the actions of his very own brother.

The world could have stopped turning right there, imploded, and I wouldn't have cared an ounce. In fact death would have been a welcoming release right about now.

Sam killed my Dad, and because of the grief and guilt, and the fact that he didn't want to live without him, he put a bullet in his head. My family was gone, all of it. If it weren't for Cas I would have been completely alone.

He hadn't spoken since we lit the pyres, and neither did I. I couldn't speak to him. I didn't want to. Forming words seemed like too much of a hassle now, it would require too much energy that I was sorely lacking.

He knew I was angry with him, and he figured I blamed him. He had found me in the empty house a few hours before sitting next to Dad sobbing and holding his hand. I begged him to bring them back but he wouldn't because of the damn promise he had made Dad a few years back. If something like this were to ever happen, if for some reason they ever died then to just let it be. They were getting up in years, had a nice long life and had bit it and been brought back so many times he couldn't count them anymore. Since Dad knew Cas was always going to be there to watch out for me, he figured I'd be okay. God was he wrong.

"Mary..." Cas said, breaking through the silence. "Please say something."

I couldn't tare my eyes away from the flames, even though my eyes were burning.

"Just leave me alone, Cas." I said.

"Even if I hadn't of made the promise to him, Mary- I wouldn't have been able to bring him back. You know that. I have limitations now, there's only so much I can do."

"If you don't have anything useful to say then don't say anything at all."

He sighed and moved his eyes to the ground. "I'm sorry."

"I know what you're thinking. He was almost seventy, he'd lived long enough, had been through enough, this shouldn't be a big deal. Finally he can rest in peace and all that bullshit-" I sent dagger eyed stares towards him. "How can you think that. He was your best friend, he was like a brother to you."

"If you think this isn't affecting me then you're wrong. But, yes I suppose I don't see death as you do. I am thankful that finally he's at peace, that he doesn't have to fight anymore. Sam too, they've both done enough. It's time that they can finally put their weapons down."

I glanced down at myself, noticing I was still streaked in Dad and Sam's blood. Instantly I tore off the button up I had over my tank top and tossed it into the fire. Without another word spoken I turned and started down the hill, making it back to the Impala.

The drive back to the bunker I could barely remember, and when I finally made it back inside I locked myself in my Dad's room and curled up on his bed, hugging his pillow to my chest.

The weeks after that were basically the same. I wouldn't come out of his room, refused to eat or drink and had pretty much banished Cas from coming inside. He never gave up on me though, I had to give him that. People always say that after you suffer a loss like that, that the nights are always the worst, but to me it was the opposite. The mornings were the hardest, because I would wake up after a night of crying myself to sleep and for a few fleeting seconds had forgotten that Dad and Sammy were gone. Then... I'd have to go through the realization all over again. It hit me like a flying brick to the forehead.

Two months dragged by slowly, and eventually one more- And I came to the conclusion that I just couldn't do it. It was either put a bullet in my own head and end it all, or figure out a way to bring my Dad and Sam back. Actually I had a thought in my mind since the moment I realized Dad was gone, it was a drastic one- A stupid one, one that would definitely ensure my ass being kicked left and right, but it was my only choice.

But it wasn't gonna be easy, especially with Cas there every second of the day watching me like a frickin hawk. In order to make sure this plan went through the way I wanted, it was gonna require having to trick him- Which wasn't really that easy anymore. He'd gotten crafty and clever over the years and knew when someone was bullshitting him.

It was the start of my act though, and the beginning of it was pulling myself off of Dad's bed and leaving the room. I took a shower, put on fresh clothes, and made my way to the kitchen where I knew Cas would be. It was nearing lunch time, and even though I refused to eat he'd still make me something. I caught him cutting a PB&J sandwich in half with a glass of milk sat off to the side. When he noticed me standing in the doorway he almost dropped the knife he held.

"Mary..." He looked stunned pretty much, and I guess it was understandable. I'd been a hermit for the last three months. "You're... Up."

"Yeah," I nodded, slithering my way into the kitchen. "Took a shower, changed my clothes. Miracle, right?"

The first thing he did was grab me and hug me so tightly I could barely breathe, which only made the pain that much stronger. He was happy that I finally crawled my way out of Dad's room, he probably figured I was coming out of the dark pit of despair I'd been stuck in. I hated that I was deceiving him, that I was gonna hurt him- But as far as I was concerned I didn't have a choice anymore.

"You need to eat something." He said, after letting me go. "You've gotten too thin, it's not healthy."

He pushed the plate closer to me and I stared at it in disgust. The last thing I wanted to do was eat, I just wanted to get out of the bunker.

"I guess..." I sat down and took a small bite and had to choke it down. "It's definitely not a burger though."

He nodded and sat down across from me, watching my every move. "That's right. I forgot that you don't really care for pb&j. But there wasn't anything else in the kitchen to make you."

"It's okay. I guess I need to go shopping or something. Doesn't really sound like much fun though, I'm pretty weak."

He let out a sigh and stared down at the table. "I could go, but... I don't want to leave you alone."

"Why? It's not like I'm gonna do anything? If I was gonna gank myself I would've done that a long time ago." Maybe that wasn't the right thing to say, because his eyes fell from mine and he looked completely crushed. "Really, Cas. I'm doin better now. I just needed time. You can trust me."

I even added a small smile for good measure, and it felt foreign and unusual. I hadn't smiled in months.

But that seemed to do the trick, surprisingly enough. He practically lit up at that point, which made me feel even more horrible.

"Alright, I suppose I could do that then. Is there anything in particular that you'd like?"

"I dunno, uh... Just the usual I guess. And pie... Lots of pie."

He gave a crooked smile. "Are you certain you don't want to come with me?"

"No, I think I'm gonna... Clean. This place's gettin pretty dusty." I shrugged. "Gotta start getting back to normal, right?"

"Yes, definitely. It would certainly be a nice change."

After smiling at him one last time he zapped away and I instantly jumped to my feet. I had an hour I guessed before he'd come back, because Cas really sucked at shopping. If he wasn't making a mess in the aisles, he would stand and stare at a pie in one hand and another pie in the other and contemplate on which one was decent enough to be purchased. Then of course came choosing beer, and everything else.

First thing I did was run back into my Dad's room and start rifling through his drawers, finding his old hex bag that he kept stuffed under his socks. He never used it anymore, he didn't need to with Cas putting sigils on his ribs. But I needed it, because my ribs weren't scribbled on and if I didn't take it then Cas would be able to track me down instantly once he realized I was gone.

Yes I hated myself for lying to him, for making him believe he could trust me. But he never woulda gone for this plan if I told him the truth. So, I grabbed the keys to the impala and flew out of the bunker as fast as I could.

The nearest crossroads that I knew about was nearly two hours away, and I would be getting there just after sunset. I knew I broke the sound barrier by how fucking fast I drove, and somehow by a miracle I didn't get pulled over.

When I stopped at the crossroads I knew the only thing I needed to do was sift through the trunk. Everything I needed to put in that little box was in there. A picture of myself, graveyard dirt, etc- So after I closed the lid I slid to a stop in the gravel and started frantically digging. Cas might not have been able to find me instantly, but he wasn't stupid. It wouldn't take him long to figure out that I would've gone to a friggin crossroads.

So I hastily threw the box in and covered over it with dirt and gravel and then jumped back to my feet. For what felt like years I stood there taking small circles waiting for the demon to show up.

"Come on." I whispered, watching a cloud of my own breath dissipate in the cool night air. "Hurry up."

After turning another circle and shivering from the cold chill, I finally heard a chuckle from behind me.

"Well well well." Came a woman's voice. "Look who we have here. Another Winchester."

I swung around quickly, eying a pretty brunette in a black cocktail dress.

"I gotta say," She went on, moving closer and her eyes flashed red. "That I'm not the least bit surprised."

"Cut the crap, let's just get on with this." I snapped.

She arched a perfectly shaped brow, the cocky smirk never fading from her pretty face. "Are we in a hurry?"

"Yes, now let's just get it over with."

She nodded. "Let me just savor this moment for a minute, sweetie. It's been a while since we've dealt with a Winchester." She sighed and crossed her arms. "Sorry about the body, I was assuming I'd be dealing with a male, I could always grab another body that's less feminine?"

"I don't give a flying fuck about your meat suit. Let's just make a deal already. I want my Dad and Sam brought back."

"Wow... You Winchesters are never ones to disappoint. Always ready to sell your soul for each other. It's touching actually. So sweet."

"I'm glad I'm making you weep, now can you do it or not?"

"Of course I can. And, you seem like a smart girl. You know the drill, right? Ten years, and then your bill comes due."

"Yeah, ten years. But I don't just want my Dad and Sam brought back. I want them good as new, no health issues, none of Sam's mental problems. They have to be god damned perfect or you can't have my soul. And... I know you gotta want it. It's no big secret that my family has caused you demons problems for decades."

She tucked a tendril of dark hair behind her ear. "Well, you are right about that. And I have to admit that having your soul over Sam or Dean's is much better. Your dear old Daddy would know his little girl's in hell, that's more torture then he'd ever receive from us."

"One last thing," I added. "When they come back, you're gonna have to work it out that they won't remember what happened to them. If they come back after several months of being dead then Dad's gonna know what I did. And he can't know, he can't find out."

"I can do that. At least to an extent. How about... When they come back, they'll think they were shot just a few days ago. You can say your angel healed them, make up a story that they'll buy. That's the best I can do, honey."

"Fine, that'll work. Are we done now?"

"If you know the drill, then you know a kiss seals the deal."

I nodded and stomped forward, grabbing her by the back of the neck and pulling her into a kiss. I could give a crap about any of this, I just wanted my end of the deal. Which was my Dad and Sam back. When I pulled away she smiled.

"Go home, wherever that is. Your Dad and Sam will be there. See you in ten years, sweetie."

And then she vanished. For a second I couldn't believe it actually happened, that I'd made that deal, but the thought of Dad and Sam waiting for me back at the bunker was enough to make me run back to the car and speed home. Ten years was a lifetime to a Hunter, it was definitely enough for me.

I screeched the car to a stop in front of the bunker door, didn't bother to take out the keys and left the drivers side door hanging open as I rushed back inside. I practically fell down the stairs and when I hit the library my feet skidded to a stop.

"Hey, baby girl." Dad said, sitting at the table as though he'd been there all along. "Where the hell were you?"

My breath was stuck in my throat, tears welled my eyes. I couldn't believe it. It was Dad, but, it wasn't only that... He looked great, perfectly healthy and maybe even ten years younger.

"I uh... Just went for a drive." I said, trying to act normal.

He slid a book he held across the table and stood and I instantly dove into his arms.

"Hey, whoa." He said, patting my back. "What's this all about. I ain't been out that long, have I?"

"What?"

"From the accident at the job. I don't remember much, just bits and pieces but I know Sammy and me got hurt."

"Oh..." I pulled away and wiped the tears away. "Yeah, you both got shot. Cas fixed you up though." Now I looked around. "Where is he anyway?"

"Beats the hell outa me. When I came to he wasn't here. Figured he was with you."

I guess that meant he was still out there searching for me. Which meant he hadn't seen Dad or Sam yet. "Oh, well whatever. Where's Sam?"

"Kitchen, lookin for food. Who went shopping and just left the bags sitting on the table?"

"That'd be Cas. He was distracted I guess."

He leaned against the table, looking more spry then I'd ever seen him. "Least he remembered the pie... Wait a second-" Now he eyed me up and down. "You feelin okay kid? You look like you lost some weight."

"It was a stomach bug, but I'm okay now. You've been sleeping for the last few days."

"Right, well we gotta fatten you back up. Want some pie?"

I nodded and gave him another tight hug. "Yeah, pie sounds awesome."

He chuckled and gave me a kiss on the cheek, his whiskers scratching me just like they always used to. I never knew I'd miss that so much. When he left the library I closed my eyes and heaved out a few deep breaths. This deal was so _so_ worth it. It was as though a million pound weight had been lifted from my shoulders, the hollow gaping pit in my stomach was gone. That is, until I heard the bunker door creak open and slam shut, and Cas' frantic footsteps descending the stairs. When he stepped into the library and saw me standing there, his eyes were ready to shoot fire.

"Where the hell did you go?" He asked, stomping over and grabbing me by the shoulders. "You scared me to death. I was searching everywhere for you."

"I'm sorry, Cas." I replied. "But I had to."

"Had to what? Do you have any idea what was going through my mind when I noticed you were gone? Do you have any idea how much I..."

His words cut off when he heard a crash from the kitchen, and I could see the alarm bells going off in his head.

"Who is that, Mary? Who's here?" He asked, his attention fixed on the hallway.

"It's fine, Cas... Everything's fine now."

His brows were squished together in confusion, and he took one step towards the hall when Sam suddenly rounded the corner carrying a sandwich. He barely passed a glance upwards before saying. "Hey, Cas. Hey Mary."

I resisted the urge to hug him now, knowing it would only confuse him just as it did Dad. Because if they were only sleeping for three days then why would I have been so damned happy to see them?

Cas swallowed a few times over, staring at Sam like he was some frightening ghost.

"Sam..." He breathed out, then his eyes immediately fell onto me.

Just as Dad did, Sam looked ten years younger. His hair was thicker, the pudge in his belly was pretty much gone, and that vacant gleam that used to shine from his eyes was gone too.

When Dad waltzed back into the library, whistling a happy little tune, carrying two plates of pie Cas even more so went pale.

"Hey, Cas-" Dad said, sliding a plate towards me. "I don't know what the hell you did, but I feel friggin great. Better than I have in ten years, hell... Maybe even twenty."

Cas didn't say anything, I honestly don't think he could. Instead he only stared at me in terror, because he knew already what I did.

"Yeah," I chimed in before Cas could call me out. "Cas is a miracle worker, right?"

"What exactly did you do?" Sam asked, ignoring his sandwich for the moment. "It couldn't have been your normal healing thing."

"Don't ask," I snorted. "It was some spell or something, something that kicked his mojo into overdrive."

He seemed satisfied with that response, and grabbed the book Dad had been reading and started flicking through the pages.

"Mary," Dad clinked his fork on his plate. "Eat your pie."

"In a moment, Dean-" Cas said, finally finding his voice. "I need to speak with Mary in private."

"It can wait." I snapped. "We got all night."

"No," Now his voice was stern. "It _can't _wait."

Dad watched our exchange with his brows arched. "What's with you two. You have a fight or somethin?"

"Not yet." Cas replied, then grabbed my hand.

I left with him willingly, because if I didn't then there was no telling what he might say in front of Dad and Sam. When we reached my bedroom he slammed the door behind him and forced his hands on my shoulders again pushing me back against it.

"What did you do?!" He shouted.

I couldn't meet his eyes but he forced them to. "Why ask when you already know?"

His hands slid from my shoulders and he took a step back, his eyes wide.

"You made a deal... You sold your soul to bring them back." I'd never seen Cas cry before, I honestly didn't know if he could, but right then it seemed like he wanted to. "How could you do that?"

"I had to, Cas." Now I was crying again. "I couldn't live with Dad dead."

"Do you have any idea what this is going to do to him when he finds out?"

"He can't find out!" I grabbed his arm and gave it yank. "Please don't tell him, Cas... Please, I'm begging you."

"You can't ask me not to tell him, Mary. I won't agree to that. He has a right to know. And being his friend I can't hold this from him."

By now I was sobbing into my hands to the point I couldn't breathe. "Just give me a few years at least, please?"

"How long did you get?" He asked.

"The usual," I wiped my eyes. "Ten years."

"Then I have ten years to find a way to get you out of this." He wrapped his arms around me. "I can't believe you did this. This wasn't the solution."

"It was the only solution for me."

He kissed the top of my head, and I could just feel the rage and pain oozing out of him.

"For now I won't tell him." He said, his voice cracked. "But I can't promise what will or won't happen in the future."

"Thank you. I just want time to spend with them. You have no idea how happy I was to see him again. Maybe you think it was stupid of me, but for me it was the best thing I could've done."

And for the next couple months everything was as perfect as it could be. I had my family back, and finally I could sleep without nightmares, and waking up in the mornings wasn't a burden anymore. Dad and Sam didn't suspect anything, at least about me making any deals. But I'd be lying if I said that Dad didn't notice the tension between Cas and me.

Cas was pissed, more pissed then I'd ever seen him. For the most part he didn't really talk to me, and if he did he made it evident by his tone that he wasn't happy. After a while it got to the point that he was making it obvious something was going on, and Dad, being the type of guy he was had to get involved.

He was making repairs on the Impala, and just as I always used to do I was in charge of handing him the right tools. He must've staged the whole car repair thing to get Cas and me alone outside, because when Cas came out of the bunker and joined us Dad instantly closed the hood.

"Okay," He said, standing up straight. "We're gonna have a little therapy session. You're gonna tell me what the hell is goin on with you two."

Cas of course said nothing, just as he had been the last two months.

"Nothing's goin on, Dad. Why do you think there is?"

"Cause you two barely look at each other, you don't talk, so I wanna know what happened. What'd he do?"

"Me?" Cas' eyes squinted. "What makes you think I did something?"

Dad shrugged, wiping his greasy hands on an old rag. "Kinda obvious I'm not gonna accuse my daughter of something. And, for the record, I didn't give you two my consent for you to dick my kid over, Cas. So whatever the hell's goin on with you guys, fix it."

Cas rolled his eyes, slamming his hands in his jeans pockets. "I'm not _dicking _anyone over, Dean. You're overreacting."

"Am I?" Dad looked to me now. "What's going on, Mary?"

"Nothing, everything's fine." I answered.

"Bull, don't give me that- I'm not stupid and I ain't blind. Something hasn't felt right for a couple months now and you're gonna tell me what." When neither of us spoke he nodded. "Okay, so maybe you can explain this. I've been having some weird flashes, it's always the same thing over and over again. That one Christmas we had here at the bunker. Everything's pretty much normal except for me. I'm young again, like I was when I was in my twenties. Now one might chock that up to dreams, but... I talked to Sammy, and he's havin the very same thing. What's that about?"

I tried not to let him see I was freaking out. I was pretty sure I knew what that was. It was his heaven. He shared his heaven with Sam, and it was the Christmas here at the bunker. It was one of the best memories I had, and I guess Dad and Sam thought that too.

"I don't know." I shrugged. "Great minds think alike, maybe?"

He didn't fall for that, and now looked to Cas. Cas was easier to crack than me.

"Answer me," He clearly wasn't amused anymore. "Now."

And just as always Cas crumbled.

"You died." He said, ignoring my pleading eyes. "During the accident at the job, Sam shot you, you died and then Sam shot himself. You were both gone."

Dad definitely wasn't expecting that, and it took him a good thirty seconds to form some kind of response.

"Uh, okay-" He spat. "So... We died. And I guess that means you brought us back, right?"

Cas shook his head. "No, I couldn't. It's not within my capability anymore, and besides- I made you a promise."

"Then..." Dad ran his hand down his face. "How're we back?"

Cas didn't speak and instead shifted his eyes to me, and Dad followed them. By now I was ready to puke all over the driveway, I was visibly shaking and could barely squeeze in a breath.

It only took Dad a few seconds to come to the realization of what I'd done, and he looked... Well, I hadn't ever seen that look on his face before.

"Oh no..." He barely whispered. "Mary, you didn't? Please tell me you didn't?"

My chin was quivering now and I couldn't bring myself to look at him. "I'm sorry, Dad."

"No, no no no." He put both hands on his head and started pacing in front of me. "Jesus, not that, Mary. Not a damn deal."

"I've..." Cas cleared his throat. "I've been looking into a way to get her out of the deal, Dean."

"There isn't a way!" He snapped back. "We've been through this before. I couldn't get myself out of it, how would we get her out of it?!"

"I don't know." Cas sighed. "I've been trying to figure out if there could possibly be discrepancies in her contract, anything we could use that would negate the bargain."

"Oh believe me, there won't be anything." Dad stopped pacing and wouldn't even look at me. "They know what they're doing, they've been doin it for centuries, they're not gonna fuck up now." The muscles in his jaw twitched. "Mary... What the hell's wrong with you? We've talked about this. If somethin happens to me or Sammy you just leave it alone. You don't go and do something stupid like this!"

I jumped at his raised voice. "I'm sorry... I tried," I sobbed. "I tried to let it go but I couldn't! You were gone for three months and it just kept getting worse and worse!"

I noticed that the reason why he wasn't looking at me was because he didn't want me to see him cry. I just barely caught a glimpse of a tear running down his cheek before he wiped it away.

"Dammit," He said, then pulled me into a hug. "It'll be okay, kid. We're gonna figure this out."

But I knew better than to believe that, because there wasn't a way to get me out of a deal. I knew how it worked, they were iron clad and unbreakable.

And yet he still tried. Once Sam found out, all three of them were up until all hours of the night researching ways to get me out of my deal. They tore through every damn book in the bunker, every folder with information jotted down from the Men of Letters, and there wasn't anything. A few weeks went by and it was still the same thing. They barely slept, and Dad was running himself ragged. It was during one of the moments he'd actually allowed himself to lay down and get some fucking sleep that I walked past his bedroom door that was hanging open- And noticed an empty bottle of Jack sitting on his dresser.

My heart stopped after that. I'd gone and made Dad drink again. He was so upset over what I'd done that he was drinking. I didn't know how long that'd been going on, but knowing him- It was probably since the day he found out what happened.

The atmosphere in the bunker was horrible. Sam and Dad didn't really talk much to each other, or to me, instead they kept themselves buried in books. Cas wouldn't really talk to me either, even though he did apologize for telling Dad about the deal.

After a few months rolled by Dad finally got it into his head that the only way to get any real answers was to talk to Crowley. It'd been a couple years since we'd seen the guy, he was hauled up in some fancy mansion in Wisconsin, of all places. And really didn't make any contact with us unless there was some demon issue he wanted dealt with. But, he answered our call almost instantly- And met us a state over at a random motel. Even though we semi trusted him, that still didn't mean we wanted him anywhere near the bunker, for obvious reasons.

And once he found out what I did he actually looked upset. I don't know why, it's not like we'd been friends. In fact Dad made it a point to keep me as far away from the dick as possible. But, I guess over the years he started to consider us his "friends" or maybe even family.

"Bloody stupid girl." He said, shaking his head. "Like Father like daughter."

"Shut up, Crowley." Dad snapped back. "Just tell us if there's anything we can do about it."

Crowley's stance was stiff, and he wouldn't peel his eyes off the floor.

"A deal is a deal, there's no way of breaking it. You know that just as well as I do, Dean." He replied.

"Well, I refuse to accept that, there's gotta be something. Some way of getting her out of it. I'm not letting my daughter go to hell, you hear me? So you better think of somethin!"

Crowley moved his eyes to me, going deep in thought. When he suddenly looked to Cas he perked up. "There might be something. But I doubt you're going to fancy it."

"Just spit it out." Sam said. "We'll do just about anything."

"You wouldn't have to do anything, Moose. Cas would."

Cas stood tall "Me? What could I do?"

"Demons are evil buggers, naturally- But not the most clever fellows, as you well know. Once Mary's ten years are up, that's it. She dies and goes to hell. But if they can't locate her after those ten years are up, then obviously she could avoid the entire thing." He looked to each of us. "I'm afraid if you want to spare her that fate then the only choice you have is to make her go away. Far far away."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Dad asked. "Go away where?"

"Not where... _When_." Crowley retorted. "Send her back to a different year. A year far back enough that they won't be able to sniff her out. If she's not here when the ten years are up, then they can't kill her- And they wouldn't be able to go back to get her. Get it?"

"Wait," I said. "How far back would I have to go, and for how long?"

"Far, thirty, forty years might be good enough. And you _won't_ be able to come back, Mary. Because the second your ten years are up here, and the moment you step back, you _will _die."

I sat on the edge of the bed, and nodded. "Yeah, Cas and me talked about that while Dad and Sam were gone. I wanted to go back and try to change what happens, but he wouldn't do it."

"Well," Crowley smirked. "Now he doesn't have much of a choice but to send you back, love."

So that was it. The only plan, the only way to save me. Dad didn't like it of course, but he was willing to do just about anything at this point. We'd decided that the best year to send me back would be 2009, just after Dad was raised from hell. That way Cas would be there. And after a few days of schooling from Dad and Sam, they figured I was as ready as I'd ever be.

Saying goodbye to them was almost impossible. Yeah, I would still be with Dad and Sam in the past, but it wouldn't be the same. And I didn't want to leave this Dad here alone. But I didn't have a choice, because even if I objected until I was blue in the face it wouldn't have mattered. Cas would've just zapped me back anyhow.

There's always consequences to certain choices made, and this unfortunately, was mine.


	23. Chapter 23

I practically bounced myself out of the backseat of the Impala when we pulled to a stop in front of the bunker door, I was that excited. I was home again.

Dad, Sam and Cas didn't really know what to make of what they were looking at. I could tell they were pretty skeptical, and wasn't sure why I was so happy about being here. From the outside, this place didn't look like much. In a way it actually was kinda scary. Thick cement walls, and a door leading down underground, yeah it kinda looked like a creepy ass dungeon.

But still I hurried my way to the door and continued to bounce on my own feet as Dad followed with the key in hand.

"You wanna do the honors?" He asked, holding it out to me.

I grabbed the key from him and quickly unlocked the door, pushing it open. It groaned from decades of being shut, and we were immediately met with darkness.

Dad and Sam both pulled their guns and I only chuckled. "You won't need those, guys. This place is pretty much the safest place in the world."

They exchanged looks before putting the guns away and I stepped inside. Beside the door was the electrical box so I quickly flipped the switches and the lights came on in entry way, illuminating the floor below. I started down the stairs with them following.

"This is the control room." I said, pointing to everything, most importantly the lit up table in the middle of the floor with the map of the world.

"What the..." Dad said, circling the table.

"Yeah," Sam chuckled. "My thoughts exactly."

"It comes in handy." I said, watching as Cas stared up at the tall ceilings. "If something big ever goes down, then it'll light up on this table, pinpointing the areas, and alarms will start buzzing."

"It ever do that when you lived here?" Dad asked.

"Only once, when a devils gate got opened."

Dad moved across the room and stopped at a small table where a chessboard was set up. "Someone forgot their coffee." He said, then held up a stained mug. "How long's this place been closed up?"

"Since the fifties I think." I answered, then motioned for them to follow. When I flipped the switch on the library and it lit up, I glanced back and noticed their reactions. Shock. "Library." I stated, even though it was obvious. "Usually where you guys spent most of your time. Good place for research, huh?"

Sam blinked a few times over and looked like a kid let loose in a candy store. "Wow."

"Don't go _too _geek on us, Sammy." Dad joked.

I moved past the library and they continued to follow.

"Whoa, is that a... Telescope?" Sam asked, pointing to the massive telescope in the room just at the end of the library.

"Yeah," I nodded. "A pretty damn big one, huh?"

I had to take a second to take a deep breath- I was getting rushed up on by a river of memories from my future. It was overwhelming, and for a minute I really really missed my Dad. When I turned and noticed him standing right behind me, I couldn't help but feel a little silly. He was my Dad too, it was the same man, just a younger version. They had the same attitude, same habits, lifestyle and likes and dislikes. It was especially nice knowing that this Dad didn't hate me like I thought. He couldn't have, right? Considering he had my picture in his wallet and all.

So I started with the tour again, flicking lights on as I went. When I came to the kitchen I pointed it out.

"Holy crap we got an actual kitchen?" Dad exclaimed, taking a peak past the door.

"This place is rather large." Cas stated, still gazing around with a blank expression. "Much larger then three people would need."

"Four people," I chimed in. "You were here too, remember?"

He tore his attention off the kitchen and fixed his eyes on mine. "Oh... I must have forgotten."

"Was there ever anyone else livin here with us? Or at least coming around?" Dad asked.

"Yeah," I sighed, starting off down the hall. "Kevin."

"Who's Kevin?" Sam replied.

"Someone who died before I was born. A friend of yours. I don't know much about him, really- Just that he was only a kid when he died, a teenager I think, and there was some kind of accident here at the bunker and he didn't make it." I looked back at Dad. "You were always really tore up about it, and refused to talk about him."

But of course that was a lie- I did know about Kevin now that I had Crowley's memories.

Kevin Tran was a prophet, and he was living here with Dad and Sammy, and after the angels fell and Sam was sick from the trials, Dad made the rash decision of letting an angel in his brother to heal him. Crowley didn't know much details really, only that the angel in Sam took control and killed Kevin. Dad always blamed himself for it.

I was planning on telling them about that, just not right now. I knew I had several years before that was gonna happen- And besides, they deserved a little time to sit back and relax. Now that we were at the bunker they could actually do that.

When I made it to where the bedrooms were located, I stopped at the first door and pushed it open.

"This was your room, Sam." I said, stepping aside. "At least, in my time it was. Who knows, you might rather have a different room now."

He pushed past us and moved inside the room, taking a good look around at the dusty bed and minimal furniture there. Other than the bed, there was a nightstand, a dresser and desk, and last a radiator heater.

"This is fine. Considering that I haven't had my own room since Standford." He said.

He threw his bag on the bed and a cloud of dust rose up from it.

"Guess first thing I do is clean this place." I said, huffing. "I'm not used to seeing it so dirty."

I moved on down the hallway with Dad following, passing my old room and instead going to Dad's.

"Here's your room." I said now, giving him a smile.

Dad seemed much happier about this than Sam did.

"About damn time I have my own room, never had one before." He tossed his own bag down and started searching through drawers and eying the place from floor to ceiling. "So what else is there to see in this place?"

"Um, well there's the storage area, and uh... The shooting range-"

"Shooting range?" He turned and his eyes were wide, like I'd just announced there was a pie factory in the building.

"Yeah," I snickered. "And, well there's the dungeon."

"Dungeon?" Cas turned and glared at me suspiciously. "This bunker has a dungeon?"

"Crazy I know, but comes in handy. There's a huge devils trap painted on the floor down there- And there's other things that help with containing demons. Like handcuffs with sigils engraved on them, chains and things like that."

"Damn..." Dad shook it off. "Guess you were right about this place."

"Yep, and there's something else I wanna show you but I'll save that for after you get done unpacking."

I left him to his room and went to mine, which was two doors down from Dad's. Since Cas didn't have anything else better to do he followed me, and when I opened the door I took a deep breath.

It looked basically the same, minus the little touches I'd done to it in the future. But overall, it was the same bed, same dresser and other pieces of furniture. For a moment I stared at the left hand wall, where I had a tack board up in the future that held all of my pictures. Right about now I was wishing I'd brought all those pictures with me.

First thing I did was unpack my duffel, and sorted everything out on the bed before stuffing it in my dresser. Cas circled the room, inspecting it practically with a fine toothed comb, and I could just see the questions swirling around his mind.

"You know, you had a room too." I said, which caught him off guard. "Even though you didn't sleep and really didn't have a need for one, you still had it."

"Why? If I don't sleep then what was the purpose?"

"You had your own stuff that you'd collected over the years. And, you needed somewhere to keep your clothes."

He stared down at his suit and trench coat, his eyes squinted. "I noticed that when I came back from the future I wasn't wearing this."

"Yeah," I nodded. "I never really questioned it at the time, it was normal to me- But I'm guessing now that it started after you were human for a while. I guess the routine stuck."

"Where was my room located?"

I stopped with a shirt in hand. "Next to mine."

"Oh..." He trailed off, not knowing how to respond to that.

Once I got through unpacking I tore the dusty blankets and sheets off my bed, made a trip past Dad and Sam's rooms and grabbed theirs and headed to the laundry room. Once I was through tossing them in the washer I met Dad in the hallway.

"Okay, what else did you wanna show me?" He asked smacking his hands together.

"The garage." I answered, and led the way from the bedrooms.

"Garage? So I got a place to park my baby, huh?"

"Yep, if you can find the space."

He didn't know what I meant by that, but when I flicked the lights on and the gigantic room lit up he understood finally.

"Holy crap." He said, taking a step inside and staring at the cars and motorcycles. "I think I just came."

"Gross." I retorted, cringing. "Gotta keep it in mind that I'm your kid, Dad."

"Yeah, sorry." He moved in further. "So, we ever take any of these babies for a spin?"

"Sometimes, it was mainly me since the Impala was your car. I had my pick of any so I was a lucky teenager."

I stood back and watched him drool over everything, before leaving and checking up on Sam. He was preoccupied with picking through the books in the library. I returned to my room after that, finding Cas wasn't there anymore, so I closed the door and flopped on the bare mattress, staring up at the ceiling.

It was good to be back.

* * *

Unfortunately I couldn't sleep, my mind wouldn't stop racing. I dunno if it was being back at the bunker and the excitement of it all, or the fact that while I was back at my home- It wasn't the same. In a way it was kind of depressing, as stupid as that might have sounded. So after tossing and turning until two in the morning, I decided to just get up and try to ware myself out somehow.

Best way to do that, I figured, was cleaning this place. Because it was covered in at least two inches of dust.

The first place I started on was the kitchen, because once morning came and if someone went and bought groceries, we'd be needing breakfast. And I wasn't about to cook breakfast in a dirty kitchen. To my dismay cleaning didn't seem to settle my mind down at all, and I went in and out of dazes as I scrubbed every inch of the kitchen.

I wondered what we were going to do now. Lucifer was out, and it's not like we could just stay hidden in the bunker the entire time. Eventually we were gonna have to leave and try to take him out somehow. It might've been a little easier now, considering we had weapons here in the bunker that Dad and Sam wouldn't have had before. Not that I knew anything about those weapons exactly, when I was young Dad would never let me frickin touch them. I guess the next thing we'd have to do was start going through everything, which I knew was gonna take forever.

Before Dad and Sam had gone to sleep I had showed them the dungeon and shooting range. The storeroom was next on the list, once they woke up in the morning.

"Why are you awake?" I heard Cas say from the kitchen doorway.

I stopped on all fours, closing the cabinet I'd been halfway stuck in when he popped up on me.

"Couldn't sleep," I answered, dragging out a stack of dishes and sitting them on the counter. "Where've you been?"

"The library," He stepped inside and stopped just beside the table. "I suppose I was preoccupied by the books. There's so many of them."

"Yeah, and that's not even all of em, there's more downstairs filed in boxes near the dungeon. Everyone's got a lot of reading to do."

He moved closer and leaned over awkwardly as I dug through another cabinet. "What are you doing?"

"Cleaning, wanna help a girl out?"

"What should I do?"

I stood, letting out a huff of air and tried not to choke on the dust. "You could wash these dishes for me, that'd be a big help."

I carried them to the sink that I'd already filled with soapy water and dropped them in. He followed and stared down at the bubbles before reaching his hands for the water.

"Waitttt." I said, grabbing his wrist. "Take your coat and jacket off, roll up your sleeves, you don't wanna get your clothes wet."

He nodded and did as I said, draping his trench coat and suit jacket over the table before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt.

"You wash, I'll dry." I finished, and with another nod he started digging through the water before pulling out a plate. I watched him for a minute as he struggled to hold the slippery dish and snorted out a laugh. "I'm sorry, but this is hilarious."

"What?" He stared down at me with a completely blank face.

"You, the angel with dish pan hands." I replied. "Not that you never did dishes in the future, but it's funny right now because I seriously don't think you've ever done it before."

"You're right. I haven't."

"Well, thanks for the help."

He said nothing and for five minutes we stood in silence. I didn't even realize that I'd begun to hum quietly to myself until he stopped washing and stared at me.

"I've never heard you do that before." He said, which instantly made my face turn red.

"Oh... Yeah, I have a habit of doin that if I'm in a good mood." I shrugged. "Get it from Dad I guess, he'd always hum Metallica if he was nervous or if he was actually happy."

A faint smile creased his face. "What was it like here? In the future?"

"Normal, for me at least. It was all I knew."

"But was it good? Was it happy?"

"Most of the time, yeah. Sure we had our issues every now and then, but overall it was pretty good." I paused. "Until Sam started gettin really bad with his freak outs."

He seemed to want to avoid that topic. "Was _I_ happy here?"

After handing me a clean plate, I dried it and set it aside on the counter. "I think so. You acted like you were anyways."

"I couldn't help but notice how my future self acted when he came back here. I have to admit it was strange seeing myself that way."

"What way?"

He paused and let out a deep sigh. "I suppose the correct word to use would be normal. It's hard to believe that I change so drastically in attitude over such a short amount of time."

"Thirty some years isn't short, Cas." I chuckled.

"To an angel who's lived for thousands of years it is."

"Got me there," I dried my hands and leaned against the counter. "But a lot changes for you in those years. You're not in heaven anymore, and you'd been hanging around my Dad and Sam for all that time. They're bound to rub off on you."

"You might be right." He sifted through the water until finding a pot to scrub, and I could tell there was something else he wanted to say. "It was... Interesting- How I reacted to seeing you."

"What're you talkin about?"

"When I came back to give us the key. The way I reacted once I saw you there." He pulled his hands from the water once he realized there wasn't anymore dishes left. "It seems as though everything I wrote in the note was indeed true."

"Hm." I grabbed a glass once I noticed water spots. "So, you're saying that you didn't really believe it until then?"

"Even you have to agree when I say that something like that is unusual for someone like me?"

"I guess so."

Yet again we fell into silence for another five minutes as I continued to dry off the water spotted glasses.

"Mary?" He said, and I just barely murmured a response. "How could you sell your soul?"

I suddenly gasped as the glass fell from my hands and shattered at my feet. Instead of answering him, I knelt down and started to scoop up the shards. I couldn't have replied to that even if I wanted to, the words were successfully stuck in my throat. Since my hands were shaking now of course I jammed a piece of glass into my palm.

"Fuck, shit." I snapped, jumping back to my feet and grabbing a dish towel. "Fucking perfect."

He led me over to the table and I sat down. "Are there medical utensils?"

"First aid kit should be in the bathroom, in the cabinet." I replied.

He left and returned seconds later and sat down in front of me. And after prying my fingers loose, started picking shards of glass from my palm.

"How did..." I couldn't finish that question.

"I overheard your conversation in the hallway at the motel." He replied, not taking his eyes off my hand.

"Well that's just great. And here I thought he'd blocked you guys from hearing us."

"I must've forgotten during that moment." He pulled the last piece of glass out and started to bandage me up. "How could you do something so foolish, Mary?"

I cringed and bit back tears. "If _you really _loved someone you wouldn't have to ask me that question."

His hands froze as his eyes moved to mine. "What you did you didn't do out of love. You did it because you were selfish. You put yourself, and Dean and Sam, in that situation because _you _didn't want to live without them. How is that fair to them?"

I jerked my hand away and smacked at his when he tried to finish my bandages. "What the fuck do you know about it?"

"Apparently more then you know. If I'm to go by how my future self reacted in the hallway."

"Yeah well," I stopped and cursed slightly, failing with my bandages- So he grabbed my hand again and started over. "I couldn't help it, Cas. Try to picture yourself in a situation like that. Imagine that you love someone and then suddenly they're gone and you know you won't ever see them again. Wouldn't you do whatever you could to get that person back?"

"Possibly, but I would never sell my soul. Because ten years is hardly worth an eternity of misery. And then, worse than that- Is knowing that that loved one would be well aware of what I'd done, and then have to live out the rest of their life, and spend an eternity in heaven, without that person. All the while knowing the person they cared for so much was being tortured in hell." Somehow his tone had gone soft. "If you hadn't of come back here to avoid your deal, then after ten years you would be gone and your Father would have to live with the knowledge that his daughter was burning because of him. How is that fair, Mary?"

He enclosed his hands over mine gently, and I couldn't help but cry.

"I guess it's not fair. And honestly, I didn't really think about that when I made the deal. All I could think about was bringing Dad and Sammy back."

"For _you_," He reminded. "Because _you _were in pain, and you didn't want to live with it anymore."

"Yeah..." I nodded. "I did exactly what Dad did when Sam died. I rushed out and made a deal without thinking what might happen in the end. You're right... It was selfish of me. It was selfish of me and I fucked everything up because of it."

I waited for more lecturing, for him to point out even more how stupid and fucking idiotic I was.

"You have to tell them, Mary." He said instead. "They have a right to know."

I sat up and yet again jerked my hand away from his. "Why? What does it matter if they know about it? It's not like it's gonna change anything."

"No, but Dean _is _your Father, and Sam's your family as well. I just believe it would be best if you were honest about everything. You came back here because you wanted to help, so help yourself by telling them the truth."

Shaking my head, I couldn't even look at him now. "Lemme guess, if I don't- You're gonna go blabbing all over again, right?"

"What?"

"_You _were the one that told Dad about what I did before I came back here, even though I begged you not to. But I guess it's my own fault, right?" After rubbing my temples with a groan I nodded. "Ugh, you're right. You're always right, dammit. I hate that about you." He actually laughed quietly after I said that. "It was hard enough tell him about this the first time, I have a feeling it's gonna be even worse the second time."


	24. Chapter 24

I hadn't been this nervous since I zapped back in time and first saw Dad in that damn diner. My stomach was twisted, swirling and churning, and I seriously thought I'd puke up my breakfast. I didn't wanna tell them, but Cas was right. They had the right to know. It's just, telling them now of all times- After Lucifer broke out and we had this whole apocalypse bullshit to deal with- It seemed like a pretty crappy time to actually spit out the words that I'd sold my damn soul.

Sam was sitting in the library, reading over a stack of books and Dad was being a gigantic five year old and playing with a scimitar that had been sitting on a shelf as decoration. Cas was... Well he was eying me as though he knew what was goin through my head right then.

"So," I finally spoke. "What's goin on?"

Dad stopped with the sword and practically threw it back on its stand, as though I hadn't seen him swinging it around.

"Nothin," He answered. "Just... Hanging out. Ya know, this place is friggin awesome, Mary."

I nodded. "Yeah, it's pretty cool."

"These books are crazy," Sam commented. "There's stuff written here that I've never even heard of before. Monsters that I've never seen before. Ones that I don't think any Hunter I've ever _known _as seen before."

"Don't suppose there's anything written there that can help us with our Lucifer problem, is there?" Dad asked.

"Not that I've found, but I'm still researching."

"What about the weapons you talked about kid?" Dad directed his attention to me now. "Anything down there that can nuke the devil?"

"I dunno, we'd have to go through everything." I moved into the room and sat at the table, and still Cas was giving me a knowing look.

He was prodding me with his eyes to start talking, so I retorted with a pretty bitchy expression that made him squint. You can't rush something like this, I needed to feel the moment was right. But, hell I doubted the moment would ever feel right.

"I, uh..." Pausing, I yet again flashed another bitch face to Cas when I noticed him arching a brow at me. "There's somethin we need to talk about, guys."

Dad turned from his new toy and sat down. "Okay, what is it?"

My heart was racing now and I was in the thralls of a full blown panic attack. How the fuck was I supposed to spit this out? Just be like "Oh by the way, I sold my soul for you guys"? Uh, no... But I really didn't think any way I phrased it would make it much better. This was gonna be awful no matter what.

"I may or may not have lied to you about something." I finally spat.

Cas stood after I said that and started for the hallway from the library. I guess he figured I'd wanna do this in private. Or maybe he wanted to avoid the screaming and cussing, or me sobbing like a baby.

Dad was the first to lean forward with his elbows on the table, staring me down. "Lied about what?"

"Cas you don't have to leave." I said quickly, stopping him in the doorway. "It might be better if you stayed."

"This is a family matter, Mary." He replied.

"You're family, besides... I might need you to shazam me outa here in a hurry."

Cas sighed and returned to his previous seat.

"What the hell's goin on?" Dad barked. "What did you lie about?"

"First," I held up my hand. "Just... Don't yell at me. It's not like I haven't heard it already, and just... Let me get this out in one go with no interruptions?"

"Okay," Sam shrugged. "Go ahead."

My hands were cold and clammy, and shaking like a frickin... Something.

"Well, it was about the other reason why I came back here to this year. It wasn't just cause I was tryin to stop what happened to you and Sammy in the future, there's more to it than that." I started. "I, um... After you died- I really really tried to get past it. For three months, and it just wasn't getting any better. I guess I kinda flipped out or something, had a momentary case of insanity. All I could think about was what I could've done to make it right again, so... I guess that's why I did it."

Dad was staring at me with a slack jawed expression. "Uh... Did _what_, Mary?"

I yet again looked to Cas, but now his eyes were planted firmly on his lap. I guess he was waiting for the inevitable outburst.

"I... Tricked Cas- Got him to leave the bunker. After that I grabbed a hex bag so he couldn't find me and took off in the Impala... I drove for a couple hours until I came to a... Crossroads."

Now Dad's eyes went wide and he sat up stiff and straight. "Wait a fucking second..."

"Yeah," I nodded. "I made a deal... To bring you and Sammy back. Ten years, I got the usual ten years. But once you found out about it, you flipped out. You wanted to find a way to get me outa it but there isn't a way. So, you talked to Crowley and he told you the only way for me to avoid getting myself killed at the end of the ten years was if I came back here. Cause... They couldn't kill me if I wasn't even in my own year."

I waited for Dad to start screaming, to cuss at me, to call me an idiot- Something- But instead he just sat there with his face blank and eyes wide.

"Oh my god..." Sam breathed out, shifting in his seat to look at Dad.

Still, Dad said nothing. And just when I was ready to grab him and shake him he pushed his chair out from the table, stood, and walked out of the library. I heard him stomp up the stairs as the bunker door creaked open and slammed shut.

"Shit..." Sam continued. "Ugh, Mary- What were you thinking?"

"She was thinking that she wanted to be with her family again." Cas answered for me, since I was too busy sniveling to talk. "Even though it was an ignorant choice on her part."

"Blow me, Cas." I snapped. "I feel bad enough, no need to add fucking salt to the wound."

Yet again he squinted at me.

Sam pushed his hair from his forehead and blew out a breath of air. "That's, uh... I didn't expect that. So... You came back here because that's the only way to avoid the end of the deal?"

"It wasn't the main reason. I really did want to come back here in the beginning to try and change what happened in the future. But, when I asked Cas about it he wouldn't do it. Then after I made the deal it was pretty much my only option. So, I figured why not make the best of a bad situation."

"Still," Even Sam was having a hard time forming a coherent response. "That's... A pretty drastic thing to do, Mary. But... I guess I get it. I mean, Dean did the same thing, I _tried _to do the same thing." He sighed. "Guess that's just something that runs in the family."

"In my opinion that's not a _good _thing." Cas scowled. "Your family really needs to learn that you can't keep selling your souls for each other." He glared at me. "And apparently I need to watch myself around you, Mary- Since it was my fault you managed to get out of the bunker long enough to make that deal in the first place."

"You wouldn't have been able to stop me even if you knew what I was doing. I was dead set on it." I stared past the library and at the stairs. "I wish he wouldn't have left like that. I would've rather he cussed me out then just walk out without speaking."

"He's gonna need some time, Mary-" Sam replied. "That's a lot to take in, knowing your daughter sold her soul. But, I'm sure he'll cuss you out when he gets back."

The room fell silent before Cas said. "So this means you won't be able to return to your own time. And, once you've lived out your life here, eventually making it to the end of your ten years, you're still stuck in this predicament. It's just a much longer wait." His lips cinched. "Which means I at least have a longer time frame to find a way to get you out of the deal."

"What?" I jerked my head up. "Cas, you can't and you know it."

"There's always a solution, I just have to find it. Perhaps there will be something here in this bunker that could give answers."

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "There's gotta be something written down in all these books, and the files downstairs. If there is we'll find it, Mary."

I sighed, standing from the chair. "You guys have more important things to worry about right now. Like Lucifer, the apocalypse, and tryin not to become vessels. Not to mention all the other shit that goes down in the future. Don't waste your time tryin to find something that doesn't exist."

"So we just allow you to go to hell in the end?" Cas retorted.

"I got myself in this... Why should I risk you guys just to try and get me out of it?"

Cas stood now. "Because believe it or not- I don't want you to go to hell. And I'm fairly certain that Sam and your Father don't want that either. So, this is just another issue on top of even more issues that we need to fix."

Yeah... I was an issue. I knew that already. I complicated things more then they already were. If it wasn't me comin back here and causing all sorts of shit, then it was this stupid deal I made that was gonna make even more trouble. Nothing good had come from anything I ever did. Yeah, Dad and Sam got brought back, but then I had to leave them behind to come back here- And Dad had to live with what I did. I thought I could change things and so far I didn't. Yeah, maybe Dad and Sam weren't on the outs, like they were in the story I knew, but... It still didn't change the fact that Lucifer was set free.

I didn't say anything else and left the library, heading up the stairs and out the bunker door. Dad was gone of course, he had taken off in the Impala. I didn't know when he'd come back, but I was gonna wait it out for him.

I took a seat outside, leaning against the wall and it felt like hours, actually I think it _was_ hours- But I was patient. When I heard the Impala finally pull back into the drive I immediately jumped to my feet, meeting Dad just as he was getting out.

Thankfully he wasn't drunk, and I felt my hands nervously twisting in front of me as he finally walked closer.

"Where'd you go?" I asked.

"For a drive." He replied gruffly.

"Oh... Well... Can we talk?"

He sighed, pursing his lips and refused to look at me. "Okay... Talk."

Just as when I was a kid and I knew I was in trouble, I couldn't force my eyes off my feet.

"I know you're pissed at me for what I did. I know you probably think it was stupid..."

"_Probably _think?" He interrupted. "Hell yes it was stupid! You sold your fucking soul for us when we'd lived all the life we were gonna live! We were old, Mary. I was nearly seventy, we'd of probably croaked all over again before your ten years would've even been up. It wasn't worth it!"

My bottom lip quivered and I felt like a five year old all over again. "It was worth it to me."

He shook his head, muttering a quiet "Shit." under his breath. "What the hell are you supposed to do now, huh? If you decided you wanted to go back, you couldn't." I didn't respond. "And yeah okay- You stick around here, then forty years or however long it is goes by and your ten years are up, you're still screwed."

"I'm sorry... It's just... You're my Dad, what the hell was I supposed to do?"

"Let me go." He replied. "If you know me as well as you say you do then you shoulda known that I never would've wanted this for you. Maybe I'm not used to this whole Father thing yet, but I sure as hell know enough to tell me that somethin like this woulda ended up killing me- Knowing my daughter sold her soul for me when I probably had a good two years left myself." He shook his head. "No way... I can't deal with somethin like that. Me makin that choice is one thing, but not my damn kid."

I nodded, still not able to look at him. "I'm sorry. I didn't wanna hurt you."

He sighed, and finally pulled me into a hug. "I know. And we're gonna find a way to get you outa this. I know I probably have said it's impossible, but... There's gotta be some way."

I guess I'd let him believe that if it provided some kind of comfort, even though I knew it was impossible.

"Well, with you and Cas so gung ho about it- I'm sure you'll do it."

He pulled away and leaned against the wall. "You know, I never you knew you as a kid, and I know you're an adult and I'm only seven years older than you- I don't know why it is but whenever I look at you, all I see is this little girl..." He chuckled nervously. "It's weird... But, maybe that's a good sign or somethin, I dunno."

You always heard about parents looking at their kids, no matter how old they were, and seeing nothing but babies. But how could that happen if he didn't raise me, and had only known me a couple months? I dunno maybe it was some kind of parent and child bond. Cause a lot of the times when I looked at him I didn't see a young guy, I saw the Dad I knew in the future.

"Okay," He pushed away from the wall and opened the door. "Let's get inside. We got a lot of work to do." Before stepping inside he rose a finger. "Almost forgot. I bought supplies."

"Supplies?"

"Yep," He jogged back to the Impala and grabbed several bags from the backseat. "We got a kitchen now, be nice to eat actual food for once and not somethin you gotta heat up at a gas station microwave."

I followed and grabbed the beer and once back inside, I sifted through the bags and found the usual things my Dad would eat. Bacon, burgers, pie, an even a few porterhouses. He was even considerate enough to grab Sam the crap he'd need for his salads.

"Now all I need to do is learn how to cook." Dad joked, setting the beer in the fridge.

"I got that, Dad."

"You cook?"

I snorted out a laugh. "Uh, yeah. Remember I said the only thing you knew how to cook pretty much was burgers, and we couldn't live on those everyday."

"Awesome, what's your specialty?"

Shrugging, I sat the bacon and bread aside. "I dunno, I can cook pretty much anything. But our menu never strayed far from burgers, pizza, lasagna and stuff like that. But... I guess what I was best at was pie."

"_Yess_." He said. "Best daughter ever. Makes sense though, you couldn't be my kid and not know how to bake a friggin pie."

I rolled my eyes and stifled back another laugh then started getting things ready to make lunch.

"Hey guys," Sam said from the kitchen doorway. "I think I found something, come check it out."

Dad followed after him, and once I made a quick lunch of BLT's I joined them too. Sam must've been waiting around for me before he started semi reading from his laptop.

"Okay, there's been some strange deaths going on in a town in Illinois, but to skip to the gist of it- A survivor who's now locked up in a mental ward of the local hospital, claims that she was jumped by a cloud of black smoke."

Dad sat up with a mouthful of sandwich. "Demons? Friggin great, what else did the survivor say?"

Sam sighed. "That she could remember what the black smoke wanted, and that there was more than one in town- Their plans were to start taking over, assembling a small army for what they said was, "Searching for their Father's lost vessel"."

Cas turned from the bookshelf he had been eying. "That's not surprising. Lucifer's going to become desperate seeing is that the vessel he has now isn't stable. And obviously you're not going to go to him willingly, chances are he's going to have his followers stationed all over the country trying to lure you out."

"So what're we supposed to do about it?" I asked. "Sam can't really go out there and fall right into their trap can he?"

Sam tapped his fingertip on his plate, staring down at the table. "I'm not gonna sit back and hide from him while he's got demons out there slaughtering people just to find me."

"So, what?" Dad swallowed his bite. "You go out there and risk gettin jumped by him?"

"He can't possess me of I don't say yes, Dean-" Sam retorted. "And you know just as well as I do that we can't stay here and do nothing."

"Yeah, maybe- But we sure as hell can't go out there without some kind of plan. Our ribs might be scribbled on, but all it takes is one demon getting away and running straight to his Daddy, then we're screwed."

"Then we just can't let them know we're coming." Sam finished, closing his laptop. "From what the survivor claimed there's not many demons left in town, they all suddenly ran after their leader or whatever got a "phone call"."

"Let me guess," Cas said, joining us at the table. "This supposed phone call was made through a bowl of blood?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "Which, was pretty much all the more confirmation her therapist needed to throw her in a padded room."

Now I started tapping my fingertips on my plate. "I dunno if it would be smart to go talk to her. At least, not you and Dad because..."

"If the demon allowed her to remember so much information it was obviously because they knew it would bring Dean and yourself right to them." Cas finished for me.

Dad nodded. "You might be right, but we gotta know what all she knows."

"Then let me do it. I doubt the demons know me, I'd be able to get in there and question her and get back out before I'd draw attention." I finished.

And instantly all three of them started to object, Dad finishing with how stupid of an idea that was to send me into a place that could be crawling with demons, alone- And that I was, without saying the actual words, a friggin moron. I scowled bitterly through their rants and once they'd gone quiet I opened my mouth to speak.

"No!" Dad interrupted before I could get a word out. "You're not doin it."

"But..."

"No." He repeated. "I said no and I mean no."

I crossed my arms over my chest, looking away and pouting for a good thirty seconds as everyone fell silent. Finally I just spat everything out as quickly as I could.

"It's not like I don't know how to do my job, you taught me everything I know, right? And I'm not stupid, I know how to fight demons, what to look for, and if it really bothers you, you could have Cas follow me invisibly. Yeah maybe I'm your kid but I'm also a Hunter, and if people are dying we're supposed to do what we can to fix that. Yeah maybe you do look at me and see a little girl, but I'm _not_ a little girl, I'm an adult that's fully capable of taking care of herself. So yeah, I'm glad you wanna watch my ass and all but one of these days you're gonna have to realize that like you, I'm a _HUNTER_, which means..."

"Stoppp." Dad whined, rubbing his forehead. "Jesus take a fucking breath."

Sam chuckled and Cas only watched on completely blank.

"Alright." Dad relented. "Maybe it ain't such a bad idea if Cas can follow you around. That way you wouldn't be completely on your own in case it all goes to shit." He stood and wagged his finger at me. "But for the record, I don't like it and if during the drive I come up with somethin else better, you're not doin it."

I grinned and jumped to my feet. "Deal- I'll go pack."

Dad grumbled as I started for the door. "This kid is gonna kill me."


	25. Chapter 25

**_I wanna say thanks again for the lovely reviews it makes me soo happy :D_**

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The drive was actually pretty damn short, considering. I guess I was just eager to get outa the bunker and get back to work. I loved my home and all, but I got restless if I wasn't out making myself useful. Which is why it really drove me crazy whenever Dad would leave me behind to go on a job in the future.

Speaking of Dad, I could tell his mind was spinning over what he found out about me. I knew he wouldn't take me selling my soul lightly, but the majority of the drive his jaw was clenched so tightly I thought he'd crack teeth. It was kinda hard to determine what his emotions might've been. Pissed, sure that was obvious, but whatever else he mighta been feeling I had no idea. Even though I knew he didn't hate me, I couldn't exactly say that he loved me either simply cause I just didn't know. It would've been illogical for me to assume he loved me like a daughter already. I'd only been here a couple months. I guess it was just wishful thinking.

During the drive I stayed silent when they fell onto the subject of getting me out of my deal, and after a while the discussion turned heated between Dad and Cas- Because both seemed to have different versions of how they could fix it. Dad wanted to try it the old fashion way, like when he sold his soul- Finding the demon that held my contract. Cas argued that wouldn't work, and the better solution would be to come into contact with the actual King of the Crossroads, which at this point in time was Crowley.

Kinda had to side with my Dad on this one, Crowley during this year was a raging pain in the pooper- And there'd be no way in frickin hell he'd actually agree to help us out, not without wanting something massive in return. And going to future Crowley wouldn't have worked, cause at that point in time he'd already faked his death and was no longer King of Hell. He wouldn't have been able to do jack squat, naturally.

But yeah, Cas wanted to summon Crowley, trap him, and threaten him into fixing what happened somehow. Not sure how exactly he'd accomplish that, seeing is that I'd made this deal decades into the future, but that was his idea.

Neither of those options would work though, and I think they both knew that which is why they were yelling at each other. And by the time Dad pulled to a stop in front of a diner, I was completely fed up. Sam too, who had been silent during their bitching at each other, kept casting me sympathetic glances from over his shoulder.

"Fuck you, Cas!" Dad finished, cutting the engine. "She's my kid, not yours and she sure as hell ain't your responsibility!"

Cas sighed, his lips cinched to invisible as he stared out the window. "She's not only your responsibility, she's also mine. I stated in the note..."

"You know," Dad turned and glared at him, and I halfway wondered if he'd dive over the seat and punch his face in. "I'm getting damn tired of hearing about that stupid note. So your future self told you to watch out for her, fine- Awesome, I'm all for you helpin out, but that don't mean you can start taking over and making the choices that I should be making."

"I'm much more qualified for something like this then you are, Dean." Cas snapped back.

"Why do you care, huh? If you're only goin by what was in the note then why are you so determined to fix this? Kinda hard to believe it's only cause of that."

Sam yet again looked back at me from over his shoulder, and slightly motioned for us to get out of the car- Which we did. We both climbed out without speaking and entered the diner, finding a booth and taking a seat. By the time they either noticed we weren't there anymore, or decided to stop arguing, Sammy and me had already ordered our drinks and I got an appetizer of chili cheese fries.

Dad stomped over and slid in the booth beside me, cutting Cas off before he could get that seat. He awkwardly sat next to Sam afterwards and shot death stares in Dad's direction. Dad returned the gesture with basically the same expression.

"You guys done?" Sam asked, snickering under his breath- At least one of us found this amusing.

Little did they know but Dad and Cas fought a lot in the future too. Mainly about me. At first it was cause Dad found out about Cas and me, after Cas blabbed it of course. He threatened to filet the angel piece by piece, topping it off with deep frying his wings extra crispy with a side of cole slaw. Cas defended his actions and tried to explain that we hadn't done anything that would more or less "sully my honor". Yeah, it took a while for Dad to get used to the idea but he finally did, and after a while he actually kinda liked the thought of it. Yeah they bickered like an old married couple, but they were best friends.

Only, right at this moment, they weren't best friends yet. Dad still didn't quite trust the guy most of the time- So I hated that they were fighting. Normally they'd resolve their issues over a beer and a nice long talk, but I didn't think that'd be happening this time.

"Oh we're done," Dad finally answered after stealing a mouthful of my fries. "Just as long as Cas knows that he ain't the boss around here."

"I think you both need to hug it out." I said, giving a cheeky grin to Dad once he glowered at me. "What? That always worked in the future?"

"Seriously?" Sam snorted.

"I'm not _hugging _Dean." Cas pouted, crossing his arms.

"Okay, then both of you just knock it off. Yeah, you both wanna get me outa of my deal, but you're not gonna come up with anything if you're busting each others balls." I shrugged. "So, quit being babies."

But I could see Dad wasn't done, and there was clearly somethin else on his mind, something that actually surprised me once he spat it out.

"Are you screwin my daughter?" He asked, and both Sammy and me sat back with our eyes wide once we heard it.

"What?" Cas squinted, just as he always did. "Of course not. Mary, tell him we haven't done anything inappropriate."

I snickered, then looked to Dad. "Oh yeah, we're totally doing it. Every night, sometimes ten times- It's a wonder that he even has a dick left."

Cas' eyes went wide and all the color drained from his face and Dad only shook his head.

"A simple no would suffice, Mary." He grumbled.

"Why does that even matter anyways?" I replied. "That's not the issue here, you guys bitching at each other is the issue."

"Dean Jr has a point," Sam laughed, he was having way too much fun with this. "Just drop it already."

Finally Dad and Cas stopped with the fighting, and we waited for the waitress to come back. Once we placed our orders we sat in silence and Cas kept giving me looks that said he wasn't happy with what I said. I only smiled back, because let's face it, I was my Dad's kid- And eventually the smiles must have wore him down because he finally sighed and just as he used to, nervously moved his eyes to his lap.

After we got our food, and Dad and me were diggin into our burgers and Sam his salad, I for one went stiff when three men suddenly stopped by our table.

"Sam and Dean Winchester?" One man said. "Damn, it's been a while hasn't it?"

Dad instantly dropped his burger. "Wait a second... Gerry?"

"Yep, the one and only."

I eyed all three men in suspicion, and it seemed Cas too didn't know what to make of em. They were scruffy and looked as though they'd just gotten through rolling around in the dirt. I figured they were hunters because that's the way a lot would look after a job. The main guy, Gerry, was probably in his mid forties, had a thin beard and pot belly.

"Shit, Sam- You got tall." Gerry commented. "Lot's changed in the last ten years."

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "When was the last time we saw you? Wasn't it... That Wendigo in Wisconsin?"

"Yeah, you two were just kids then, damn... I'm gettin old." He grabbed a chair and pulled it over, and his buddies followed. "So what brings you to Illinois?"

Dad didn't answer right off, and I could tell he didn't wanna give away any info. "We're just passin through is all."

"Did you come here cause of the demon thing?" One of the other men asked. "Cause that's what brought us into town."

"We did hear about that," Sam replied. "But we hadn't looked into it yet. Have you guys found anything?"

Gerry snorted. "Hell yes, it's been crazy here the last couple weeks. Five people have gone missing, another five are dead- Then of course there's the lady in the looney bin gettin pumped full of Thorazine."

"And?" Dad shrugged. "What else have you found out?"

"Not much, actually I'm kinda glad you guys showed up- We could really use a hand with this. We tracked the demons to some big house on the edge of town, they're hauled up there for some reason- Haven't come out in days. We figure somethin big's about to go down." Gerry answered, then pointed to his buddies. "Sorry, lemme introduce you. That's Jake and Rob, we've been hunting together for a good five years now." He shifted his creepy little eyes to me. "And who's this pretty little thing?"

"Uh..." Dad cleared his throat. "This is Mary, she's my..."

"Sister-" I chimed in. "Yeah, long lost sister they never knew they had."

Gerry's brows rose. "Huh, little sister- And, uh... Who's that?" He looked to Cas now. "He don't look like a Hunter."

"I'm Castiel, I'm a..."

"Hunter in training." Dad interrupted. "He hasn't gotten the clothes thing down yet."

"Right," Gerry looked skeptical. "So you guys in or what? We could kinda use some help with this."

I knew Dad didn't wanna mention Cas being an angel to these guys, cause there really wasn't any way of knowing if they could be trusted. And that's why I chimed in and claimed I was their sister- For one because these guys coulda been dangerous and used the info I was Dad's daughter to their advantage somehow, and two because it was much simpler to say I was Sam and Dad's sister then to explain _how_ he had a daughter as old as I was.

"We, uh-" Dad shrugged. "We were gonna check out the woman at the hospital, do a little investigating of our own."

"Yeah gotcha," Gerry nodded. "Well after you're done how bout we get together tonight and compare notes?"

"Sounds good," Sam smiled. "Be careful out there."

With a wave they left the diner, and after they were gone Dad shoved his plate away. "We're not workin with them."

"Yeah, no kidding." Sam replied.

"Am I missing something?" I asked. "Are these guys assholes, or what?"

Dad and Sam exchanged glances. "Not exactly. But Gerry kinda has a way of going about things that we don't." Sam answered. "People have a tendency to get hurt when he's around."

"And he don't care, as long as they gank their monster in the end." Dad finished. "Last time we ran into Gerry, Sammy was fifteen I think, Dad decided to team up with him for that wendigo thing- Long story short, Sam got his leg broken cause of some crap Gerry pulled."

Yeah I got the feeling just by lookin at the guy that he was shady or dangerous. Guess I wasn't wrong about my suspicions- My sixth sense or whatever was right again.

"Let's go." Dad said, after throwing a wad of cash on the table. "We got work to do if we wanna beat them to the punch."

Well the fighting between him and Cas was over now for the moment, thankfully. At least long enough for us to finish this job. So we left the diner and instead of making a stop off at a motel like we'd normally do, we went straight for the hospital where the woman was locked in the mental ward. When we pulled to a stop out front Dad turned and looked at me.

"Change of plans," He said. "You ain't goin in alone."

"What?" I barked back. "Why not?"

"Because if there are three other hunters here in town takin this case, then that means it's probably bigger than we thought. It's too much for you to handle."

I didn't expect Sam or Cas to jump to my defense, everyone wanted to coddle me like a frickin helpless puppy they found on the side of the road.

"So lemme guess, you're gonna make me stay in the car?" I replied.

Dad smiled. "Hey, you're catching on kid. Good job." He then shook his head. "But no, not this time. You can come in with me, I want Sammy and Cas to go check out the house Gerry was talkin about."

I practically jumped outa my seat after he said that. It had been _forever _since Dad and I went off alone on a job that actually required goin in and questioning victims. Actually we hadn't done it at all since I zapped back to this year. So that meant that this Dad didn't even know if I could handle the job. Which of course instantly made me nervous. If I slipped up just once then he'd never bring me with him again.

Once we climbed out of the car he popped the trunk and grabbed the usual necessities, such as his suit with a matching sweater vest- A jacket for me and proper I.D's. I noticed he was opting for posing as a journalist this time, instead of a FED, which I suppose made sense- I couldn't pass as a cop no matter how hard I might've tried. Dad always said I had doe eyes, whatever the fuck that meant. Last but not least he grabbed a binder which he shoved into my arms.

We entered through the back doors and he jumped into the bathroom to change his clothes, stuffing his others in an empty briefcase he brought with him.

"Stay behind me, kid-" He said as we moved to the front of the hospital and to the front desk. "Play along."

Duh, I thought- What'd he expect me to do?

It didn't take long for someone to notice us and it just so happened to be a young pretty woman which Dad instantly flirted with.

I rolled my eyes, grumbling to myself, this was somethin I didn't need to see. But the flirting worked and we found out what room the victim was locked in and started up the elevators. Overall Dad didn't have much trouble schmoozing the doctors and nurses, and before long we were chatting with her psychiatrist.

"If I'm to be honest," She said, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "I've never seen anyone that seems to be so coherent, while having such vivid hallucinations. If you were to see her on the street you wouldn't even know she was suffering from mental illness." She paused and then eyed the both of us. "Who did you say you worked for again?"

"The Northwest Tribune," Dad answered, showing his ID a second time. "We were hoping to speak with Mrs. Grayson, and get her take on the events."

"The events?" The Doctor snorted. "Sir, you do realize that everything she claims has happened is hallucinations caused from schizophrenia?"

"I understand that, Ma'am- But we just go where they send us."

Not to mention that despite this woman's "hallucinations" five people had disappeared and five more were found dead. Who's to tell what else was goin on.

"Fine, you're actually in luck- She's been itching to talk to someone. Under normal circumstances I wouldn't allow it, it just promotes her to believe her hallucinations are real, but... She's being discharged at the end of the week." She tucked a pencil behind her ear. "So she won't be my problem anymore."

Wow, nice Doctor- And apparently Dad agreed with me, because after she unlocked the door the woman was behind and walked away, he muttered. "Bitch" under his breath.

Now we stepped inside and found a woman sitting by the window reading a book. She seemed to be in her middle thirties, had dark hair and a fair complexion. Once she spotted us she closed her book and sat up straight.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

Dad flashed his best smile. "We're from the Northwest Tribune, and if you'd like to..."

"You're reporters?" She interrupted.

"I am, this is my assistant." He pointed to me.

She nodded. "Well, I've been wanting to talk to someone for weeks now, but no one would listen. The police didn't care about anything I said, so I guess a news article is better than nothing." She motioned to two more chairs and we quickly sat. "What would you like to know?"

I flipped open my binder, grabbing a pen to prepare for my fake notes I should've been jotting down.

"Why don't you just tell us everything from the beginning?" Dad asked. "The whole story."

She nervously chewed at her fingernails. "God... Where do I start? It's like a nightmare. It happened two and a half weeks ago, maybe it was longer, I honestly don't even know anymore. I was going for a late night jog when this... This cloud of black smoke just..."

"Rammed itself down your throat?" I finished for her.

She nodded. "Yes, exactly. It was awful, and the smell was disgusting. Like rotten eggs. But, that was only the beginning. I was awake... For all of it."

"All of it?" Dad sat up. "The entire two weeks?"

"Yes, it's so hard to describe what it was like. Being able to see everything that's happening around you but unable to move your own body."

"Like being a puppet on strings." Yet again I finished for her. "Like some weird sicko is controlling your every movement and no matter how hard you try to break the strings, you can't."

Yet again she nodded and Dad flashed me an odd look.

"Thankfully I didn't kill anyone- But I witnessed them killing people. They made me watch, like it was some twisted game for them. They thought it was hilarious."

"Did they say anything to you? Or did you overhear any conversations?" I asked.

"They, uh... They kept talking about their Father, and how he couldn't find his vessel. That he was going to send out dozens of them until they tracked it down."

Dad cleared his throat, interrupting me before I could ask anymore questions. "Five people are dead, five have gone missing. Do you know anything about that?"

"I didn't do anything, I swear... But, from what I could hear the ones who died were being used as an example, showing what happens if they fail their Father. The other five left once they got what they said was a phone call." She shuttered. "I've never seen anything like that before. A bowl of blood bubbling and hissing, I could've swore I heard voices coming from it."

"So was there only eleven, counting you? Or were there more?" Dad continued.

"There were more, maybe three or four- But I don't know what happened to them. I don't think they left town with the others, or if they're dead. After the black smoke left me I didn't see them again."

Dad stared down at me as I pretended to jot down notes. "So where did all of this take place? Was there a specific location?"

"Just outside of town, Paget street, the old brick farmhouse just off the road- You can't miss it."

Now he nudged me and then stood. "I think we have enough for our article, Ma'am. Thank you for your time."

"That's all?" She stood as well. "Well, I know it's a stupid question to ask, but... Do you believe me?"

Dad smiled and button his suit jacket. "It's not up to us to believe the story, Ma'am- I only write it."

We started for the door but she stopped us. "But you..." She latched onto my sleeve. "You talked about it as though you knew exactly what it was like. It's happened to you before... Hasn't it? The black smoke got you too?"

I opened my mouth to respond, but once noticed Dad's glares changed my words. "I'm sorry if I gave off that impression, but no."

The poor woman looked devastated as she returned to her chair and grabbed her book, saying nothing more. We left seconds later and started down the hall and once in the elevator Dad didn't hesitate to loosen his tie.

"Poor woman, she goes and tells the truth about everything and they stick her in the nuthouse." He said, then stared down at me. "What was that about in there? She kinda had a point, the way you were talkin, sounded like you'd been possessed before."

I shrugged innocently. "Well you hear this story a hundred times over you kinda get the process memorized."

"Yeah, I guess-" He then flicked at my binder. "What notes were you takin down?"

"I wasn't. I drew a picture of a pony riding a unicycle."

He was silent for a moment before snorting out a laugh. "Guess I aught tp call Sammy and see what him and Cas found out at the house." He pulled out his phone, but didn't dial right off. "You did pretty good with the questioning in there."

"I learned from the best." I smiled up at him.

"Hell yeah ya did." Now he finally dialed and it rang a couple times over before Sam picked up. "Yeah, Sammy- Whatcha got?"

The elevator dinged open and we left the way we came, making it back out to the parking lot.

"Well come pick us up, we're done here." He then hung up and we waited a good fifteen minutes before the Impala pulled back into the lot.

Cas was in the front seat so he had to climb out and get in the back, and I rounded the side and jumped in as well, and we finally left the hospital behind.

"Well," Sam said as he drove. "The house reeked of sulfur, but there wasn't anyone there right now. Cas did a sweep of the town and property and..."

"If there's demons here presently, then I can't detect them." Cas finished.

"So they all just up and ditched town?" I asked. "If that's true then what are your hunter buddies needing help with?"

"Maybe they know somethin we don't?" Dad offered, but then shook his head. "Really doubt that though. I dunno, somethin doesn't smell right. You sure the house was empty?"

"It was when we were there. Cas checked it out, I don't think he would've missed anything." Sam answered. "But let me guess, you wanna go check it out yourself?"

"Like I said, somethin don't smell right about this. A dozen or more demons don't just disappear for no reason at all, someone or something would've had to take em out."

"But do you think it's wise to actually risk encountering whoever or whatever that might be?" Cas asked. "Remember, I told you this seemed as though you were lured here and you're willing to walk straight into what could be a trap."

"Then we'll do a drive by, you can zap yourself around the house and make sure it's clear. I'm not stupid, Cas- I'm not gonna send us into a situation that could get us all killed." Dad replied. "Head for the house."

Sam sighed in annoyance but stepped on the gas. Since the town was pretty small it didn't take long to get to the edge of town, and to the old farm house that was positioned far from the road in an overgrown group of trees. Cas didn't wait to be asked before he zapped from the car, returning less then five seconds later with a shake of the head.

"It's clear. There are no demons inside." He said.

So we pulled up the drive and parked just outside, and Dad climbed out first and rifled through the trunk, grabbing his sawed off. Sam took his as well, and I was left standing with my hands in the air as Dad slammed the trunk.

"Uh... Forget someone?" I snickered.

"Oh, right-" Dad handed me his shot gun. "Cover me then."

Well I had my pistol in my jacket too, not that that would work against demons exactly- But it still made me feel better. Dad obviously didn't know I had that pistol, or else I think he would've taken it away from me. No matter how old I got in the future, Dad didn't like me handling guns, which was kinda crazy considering what our professions happened to be. Apparently past Dad didn't like it much either- Cause I could tell he didn't wanna hand over that shot gun.

Cas led the way up the stairs and pushed the door open with such a force it busted from the frame.

"Show off." Dad said, pushing past him and stepping inside.

"What exactly are we doing here?" Cas retorted, ignoring Dad's sarcasm.

"Workin the case," He answered. "Yeah there might not be anyone here now, but that don't mean we can't check it out. You never know, maybe they would've left something behind."

"Highly unlikely," Cas sighed. "I don't think they would have been that foolish."

"Demons can be stupid sometimes." I said. "Or, if they were rushed out in a hurry there's a chance they coulda left something behind. Don't know what, but ya never know."

We started past the foyer and entered a large open room with a fireplace. I know I wasn't the only one that noticed the patches of sulfur scattered around in random piles.

"Uh, is it just me, or does it seem like someone just dumped a shit ton of sulfur around?" Dad asked. "Normally there's a little dusting here and there when demons have been around, but not this much."

Cas knelt down at one of the piles and ran his finger tip through it. "It is unusual."

"It looks strategically placed." Sam added. "Like someone knew we'd be coming here looking for it, so they made it completely obvious."

"I think we should leave." Cas said, standing again. "No there aren't demons here but this is simply too strange."

I walked past the window, taking a peak outside when I noticed a rust bucket of a truck racing up the drive. "Uh, someone's coming."

Dad rushed over and took a peak outside. "It's Gerry and his buddies-" He said. "Okay, I think it's time to go."

He grabbed me by the arm and pulled me towards the door, but not before taking the shot gun back from me. We made it as far as the porch before the truck pulled to a stop and they climbed out.

"Did ya find anything?" Gerry asked.

"Nope," Dad answered. "We were just leavin."

"Did you check out the basement? Heard there's some kind of alter down there and other freaky shit."

Something weird was going on, I could feel it. And Dad pulled me closer until I was practically standing behind him.

"We'll just let you take this one." Sam said.

"So we're gonna take off." Dad finished.

Gerry suddenly pulled a revolver, aimed and shot- Hitting Cas in the ribs. Normally bullets didn't faze him, but this time he stumbled backwards and thumped against the wall. I started to dart for him when the gun was moved to me.

"No body moves." Gerry said, surprisingly calm considering. "We're gonna have a little talk."

"What the fuck is this?!" Dad snapped back.

"Cas..." I muttered, gazing back at him, but he was semi unconscious and white light was pouring from his bullet wound, I instantly snapped my eyes back to the asshole in front of me. "What the hell did you do to him?!"

"Oh this?" Gerry motioned towards his gun. "Well, you got yourself a monster killing colt, and I got myself an angel killing revolver. Found out all we had to do was melt down one of their blades, fashion em into bullets, and lookie there..." He motioned to Cas who had begun to cough. "They're down."

"What's going on?" Sam asked. "We can talk about this."

"We just want some questions answered," Jake replied. "Depending on how you answer, well- That decides what's gonna happen to you."

"Weapons on the ground." Gerry ordered as his buddies pulled their own guns. "All of em."

Dad and Sam threw down their shot guns, and their pistols from their jackets. I inched my way closer to Dad, hoping he could read my body language. For the moment he didn't, since his eyes were fixed on the bastards in front of us. Guess Cas was right, we were lured into a trap.

"So we heard an interesting story," Gerry started. "About how Lucifer went and busted himself outa the cage, about how the apocalypse had started. Course, we thought it was crazy, but... With all the demon activity lately I couldn't help but ask myself if maybe it was true."

"Then we heard exactly how Lucifer was busted out." Rob spoke now, his eyes moving to Sam. "Word has it you were the asshole responsible for that one."

Dad snorted out a laugh. "And you believed that? It's bullshit, Sam didn't bust Lucifer out."

Still I moved closer to Dad, trying to give off the illusion I was scared to death. It wasn't hard, I was scared. Cas was possibly dying behind me, and these three nut jobs were looking to hang someone for letting Lucifer out. Dad finally seemed to get it and he put his arm around me, his hand just barely brushed against the pistol I kept in the back of my jeans.

"We want the truth." Jake continued. "Or you all die."

"Wait, wait," Sam said, taking a step forward. "Just... Calm down, please. I can explain everything. This has nothing to do them, this is all on me."

Yet again I glanced back to Cas and noticed his eyes were open and fixed on Dad's hand that was ready to grab my pistol- He then shifted his eyes to the men in front of us. He was hurt, but he was still gonna make a move.

It happened pretty damn quick, Cas suddenly zapped from his spot on the porch, Dad yanked the gun from my jeans and pushed me behind him- I heard one gun shot, before several more pop pop pops before Rob fell to the ground dead, and Cas collapsed shortly after. Gerry and Jake managed to escape to their truck and speed off, and once it was all over and done with I couldn't breathe.

Honestly, I didn't even feel the pain until I looked down and saw my shirt quickly soaking in blood- A half a second later my legs collapsed from under me and I hit the porch with a thud.

I was hit... They shot me.


	26. Chapter 26

"Drive faster!" Dean shouted from the backseat. He was with Mary trying to stop the bleeding from the gunshot wound in her stomach.

"I'm going as fast as I can, Dean!" Sam snapped back. "How bad is it?"

"I dunno," Dean replied. "Bad... The bullet went clear through but she's losing a lot of blood, and she won't wake up."

Cas shifted from his seat in the front, his face was pale from blood loss too, and his breathing was labored. He took a long look at Mary, and the blood that was... Everywhere. He had seen death thousands of times, and hated to think that she looked on the brink of it. After turning and letting out a few deep breaths, he opened his coat and pushed his fingertips into the bullet hole in his ribs.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked, frantically darting his eyes from Cas to the road.

"I need to remove the bullet, or I'll bleed to death." He answered, cringing as his fingers dug in deeper. Once he finally felt it he ripped it out in one swift tug and tossed it to the floor. "Once I'm able, I'll try to find a way to heal her."

"How?" Dean said. "You're cut off from heaven, man."

"I don't know. I'll find something. In the mean time, just get to a hospital."

Sam pushed on the gas and sped through town, and as soon he flew into the hospital parking lot and stopped at the ER doors, Dean jumped out and grabbed Mary. After he ran inside and screamed for help, Mary was laid on a gurney and pushed back through the doors of no return. At least that's the way Dean saw them.

Sam rushed in a few minutes later after parking the car, and stopped beside his brother who was waiting outside the ER doors.

"Where's Cas?" Dean asked.

"He passed out in the car," Sam answered. "Thought I'd leave him in there to sleep it off. Hopefully he'll be okay." He glanced down at Dean's hands that were covered in blood. "Maybe you should go get cleaned up, huh?"

Dean rose his hands slightly, noticing the blood. "Yeah... Uh, just stay here in case they come back out."

The men's room wasn't far from the waiting area, so Dean rushed in and started scrubbing his hands in the sink. He stopped only after he noticed his reflection, and his shirt as well was covered in blood. There wasn't anything he could do about that now, and instead buttoned up his suit jacket, since he still wore the suit from interviewing the woman earlier. After he left the restroom he found Sam sitting in the waiting area, his elbows resting on his knees and feet nervously tapping. He only eased up once Dean had sat beside him.

"She'll be okay," Sam said with a nod. "She will. She's a tough girl."

Dean said nothing in response and instead fell silent with his eyes fixed on the ER doors.

Hours passed, and he had resorted to pacing. Cas still hadn't come inside, and he halfway wondered if the angel had gone and died in his car. But after Sam went to check on him, he was relieved to know he was still unconscious, alive, but unconscious. They had to answer questions from the police once they had been called in, because a gun shot wound had to be reported. Both Sam and Dean recited the exact same story. It was an accident with cleaning a weapon when it prematurely discharged and Mary unfortunately had been standing in the way and was hit. For the moment they weren't under arrest, and after ordering them to stay in town they finally left.

Finally, after what felt like days, a Doctor pushed through the doors and approached them.

"Are you with Amber Derick?" He asked.

Dean nodded, since that was the alias he had given Mary when he brought her in. "Yeah, that's us... How is she?"

"It was a close call, really she's lucky. Had the bullets trajectory been just a fraction of an inch higher it would have struck her kidney, but thankfully it went clean through without hitting any vital organs. There was some internal bleeding which we had to go in and fix, she lost a lot of blood and needed a transfusion, but overall I'm certain she's going to pull through."

Both Sam and Dean heaved out a sigh.

"That's... That's good, real good, can we see her?" Dean asked.

"She's being moved to ICU, so as soon as she's set up in her room you can," The Doctor replied. "It's on the sixth floor, so you can go on up and wait."

"Thanks, Doc." Dean halfway had the urge to hug the guy, but didn't. Instead he started for the elevators with Sam in tow.

"Guess we can finally breathe now, huh?" Sam asked as the elevator doors dinged closed.

"Yeah." Dean replied, his tone gruff.

Sam turned and eyed his brother closely. "You wanna talk about this?"

"Talk about what?" He snapped back. "That I almost got my kid killed? You wanna talk about that, Sammy?"

"Dean..." Sam sighed. "This wasn't your fault."

"Really?" He glared at him. "Sure as hell feels like it, but the one thing I know is that as soon as she's awake and on the mend- I'm goin after that son of a bitch and putting a bullet in his head."

"Sounds like a plan." Sam replied, stepping out first once the doors opened.

"You mean you're not gonna give me that puppy dog eyed speech about how it's wrong and all that crap?"

"Not this time." They stopped near the waiting room. "She's family, your daughter and my niece. It's not something that can be overlooked. And even if she hadn't gotten hurt, there's still a chance they would come after us again." They fell silent for a minute before Sam asked. "So, how's it going with her anyways?"

Dean instantly narrowed his eyes at him. "You wanna have a heart to heart now of all times?"

"Might as well, we got the time... So, answer me. How's it going?"

"Fine."

"Fine? That's not really much to go on, Dean. Seriously, are you guys okay or what?"

Dean sighed, taking a seat in the waiting room. "Yeah I guess. It's kinda weird, really."

"What is?"

Sam watched his brother tense up, which made him laugh inwardly.

"That I like her so much, I guess. She grew on me."

Sam smiled slightly, trying to look away so Dean wouldn't notice. "Kinda makes sense, dude. She's your daughter."

"Yeah, truth is... Is that I kinda wish..." He trailed off.

"Kinda wish what?"

Sighing, Dean shook his head and tried to get the nerves to fade by chuckling. "I kinda wish I knew what it was like in the future when she was a kid. Like what kinda Dad I was, what kinda kid she was. With all this time traveling crap goin on a part of me wants future me to zap back here just so I could actually know what it was like." He tried to ignore Sam's goofy smirking after he said that out loud. "I know that can't happen though. So, all I know now is that thing's are changing."

"How so?"

"Can't really explain it. Guess you'd have to have a kid of your own to understand." Dean finished. "It's just, ever since I got pulled outa hell, it hasn't been easy- You know that. The nightmares, the memories of what I did, the only thing that helped to block it out was drinking. Most days it was... Well pretty damn bad."

"I know." Sam sighed. "I witnessed it first hand."

"Anyways- Now that she came back here, I dunno... It's like I got something to keep me goin. Finally something good came out of my crappy life. I did something right for once."

Sam arched his brows, nodding. "So, you're saying that... You love your daughter. I get it."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Shut up."

Well at least Sam felt as though he could relax a little when it came to getting his brother to stop being a dick to his daughter. He finally snapped out of it completely and knew he wasn't just pretending to be nice to her lately. His thoughts cut off when he saw a bed being rolled by the waiting room door.

"There she is." He said, smacking Dean on the arm.

They both stood and Dean reached the bed first as she was wheeled towards her room. She was still knocked out, and she was pale as a ghost.

"Hey you hear me kid?" He asked, but she didn't respond. "Just hang in there, you're gonna be okay."

Once they pushed her into her room they had to wait in the hall while everything was set up, and by the time they were actually allowed to go in- It felt as though they'd been in the hospital for days. Dean sat down next to her bed and refused to budge, awkwardly fidgeting his hand closer to hers.

"Dean," Sam said. "Now that you know she's gonna be okay, why don't you go and grab something to eat and a change of clothes?"

"Nah, I'm not leavin til she wakes up." He replied. "Besides, hospital food'll kill ya."

Sam pushed away from the wall. "I'll go grab you something and get you some clothes."

"Extra onions."

"Remember," Sam snorted. "We're the ones that gotta live with your extra onions."

After he left they were alone for a good fifteen minutes before Cas hobbled his way into the room. Judging by the way he was leaning against the door frame he shouldn't have been up walking around.

"How is she?" He asked.

Dean cleared his throat and nodded. "She's gonna be okay." Now he shifted his eyes to the angel. "You look like hell."

With a push Cas left the doorway and practically crawled his way inside and stood beside Dean.

"I must have passed out. How long was I unconscious?"

"A few hours, I dunno- I haven't really been keepin track of time." He paused and felt his jaw clench. "You were right... I shoulda listened to you. We were led into a fucking trap and I was too stupid to admit it cause I was pissed at you."

After a sigh, Cas grabbed the nearest chair and fell into it. "I wish I hadn't of been right."

"But you were. I guess I didn't think you'd actually give a shit. I figured the only reason you'd stuck with us this long was cause you were trying to dick over your angel pals for dicking over you."

"Well, you were wrong."

"Yeah," Dean sat back and rubbed his head. "So anyways. I've been doin a lot of thinking, especially now that this happened. I think you and me both know that it's next to impossible to get her outa this deal, but... We gotta think of something, Cas. Everything I went through in hell, I can't let her go through that. We have to find some way of saving her from the pit."

Cas nodded. "I know. I just haven't come up with a way of accomplishing that."

"Isn't there some kind of angel thing that might work?"

"No," He sighed. "If I hadn't of been cut off from heaven, maybe. There might have been a chance I could find the demon that holds her contract. Of course that would mean making another trip into hell to find it."

"You'd actually do that?"

"If I could, of course. But with limited power I wouldn't survive long now." He kept his eyes fixed on Mary. "But, I'm hesitant to believe that actually killing the demon that holds her contract would affect anything. I'm certain we had thought of that very thing in the future, and since she was sent back here- That means it wouldn't have worked."

Dean squeezed her hand when he noticed her twitch. "But if we killed the demon that in the future has her contract, wouldn't that keep her from bein in this situation?"

"I doubt that. If we killed that demon, then another would just come along and take its place. No," He shook his head. "If we're going to find a way of getting her out of this, it's going to require something much more drastic. Which is why I suggested contacting the King of the Crossroads and forming some sort of negotiation."

The fact that they were even in this situation at all made Dean's skin crawl.

"Well, at least we got the assholes name if we ever do decide to summon him." Dean finally replied. "Til then, let's just make sure she gets better."

* * *

I could hear muffled voices around me, that sounded like they were talkin through a thick brick wall. Everything hurt, even right down to my toes, and my head felt full of fog. Opening my eyes required too much energy even, and if I allowed myself I knew I'd probably just drift off into another dead sleep that I wouldn't want to wake up from. But I forced my eyes open anyways, because I needed to know if I was the only one that got their ass kicked.

I remembered everything, Cas being shot, myself being shot. The last I saw of Cas he was laying on the ground after attacking the assholes that came after us.

"Hey," I heard Dad say before he leaned over the bed. "How you feelin kid?"

No words could come out right off, instead my eyes trailed around the room- And even though my vision was clouded I could make out Sam and Cas nearby. Once I noticed that no one else was hurt, and Cas didn't die, I suddenly felt a million times better- At least to the point I could croak out a few mumbled words.

"Okay," I said, which was a lie. "Why is it getting shot makes you feel like you've been hit by a bus?"

When I tried to sit up slightly, Dad helped by propping a pillow behind me. "Just take it easy, you can't go runnin around yet."

"How bad was it?"

"Bullet went clean through, no vital organs hit." Sam answered. "They said you got pretty lucky."

"Hm," I garbled. "Guess that means I can leave then."

"Uh, no." Dad replied. "You're not moving until you can actually get up and walk on your own without fallin."

My eyes closed and I practically fell asleep again before I jolted myself awake. "I can laze in bed just as easy in the bunker as I can here in a damn hospital." Dad was glaring at me by this point so I dropped that subject and instead looked to Cas. "How're you feeling?"

I could tell even without him speaking that he looked like he felt like crap. His face was pale, and he looked ready to fall over. Still, he moved closer and stood beside Dad.

"I'll be fine, Mary. It wasn't anything serious." He said.

Bull crap it wasn't serious. He got fucking shot in the ribs. Angel or not, he had his limits.

"So what happened?" I went on, feeling a little stronger. "Those assholes got away, right?"

"Not for long." Dad replied. "We're gonna find those bastards and make sure they don't pull this crap again."

Yeah that sounded like Dad. If someone was stupid enough to hurt his family, or even _attempt _to hurt his family, he'd go ballistic on their dumb asses. So, I knew that eventually he'd wanna go out there and track those fuckers down, probably kill them if he got the chance.

"I don't wanna be a bad uncle," Sam said with a sigh. "But I think I'm gonna go get a motel room and get some sleep. You mind, Mary?"

"No, go ahead. You guys look beat." I tugged on Dad's hand that I only just now noticed I was holding. "You should go too. Go sleep before you fall on your face."

He motioned for Sam to go. "Nah, I'm good. You can take off Sammy."

Sam walked over and mussed my hair, then actually surprised me by kissing my cheek. "Take it easy, Mary. I'll see you in the morning."

Since I couldn't form words I only nodded and watched him leave after flashing me a smile. Once he was gone Dad grabbed a chair and scooted it closer.

"So you need anything? You thirsty, or hungry? I could go grab you a burger?" Dad asked.

I cringed. "Ugh, no. I actually don't want a burger, so I guess that proves I feel like shit."

His eyes drooped after I said that. "Listen, Mary- I'm, uh... I'm sorry this happened. I shoulda known better then to go stompin in to that house. Especially since my gut was telling me something was wrong. But, I won't fuck up again. I promise."

It _hurt_ like hell to sit up, but I did it anyhow. "It's not your fault, Dad. It was just a stupid accident. Those assholes are the ones that started it."

He wouldn't even look at me. "Well anyways- Things are gonna be different from here on out, with everything."

I looked to Cas wondering if he could explain what he meant by that, but he kept his eyes on the floor.

"Um, okay? Don't know what you mean, but... Okay."

He patted my hand before standing. "I'm gonna go grab a coffee or something, I'll be back."

The only thing I could do was nod and watch him leave the room. Once he was gone, my head fell back on the pillow and I stared at the ceiling.

"Is he okay?" I asked.

"He's fine. He wasn't injured during the skirmish." Cas answered.

"That's not what I meant, Cas. He's acting different. He _held_ my _hand_."

His brows furrowed as he moved closer. "He was worried about you. Isn't that a normal reaction to someone being shot? We were all worried."

"Well yeah, but he's never..." I stopped, and sat up again. "Wait what? You were worried too?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

"Uh... I dunno. I guess just hearin you say it out loud was surprising." I noticed a pitcher of water sitting on the table and tried to grab it, but then yelped in pain. "Jesus, bullet wounds aren't fun, huh?"

He poured me a glass of a water and topped it off with a straw before sitting on the edge of the bed and handing it to me.

"I think you misinterpret me, Mary. I suppose that's my fault though, I know I haven't exactly made things very clear."

After a sip of water I knew I made a mistake by putting something in my stomach, it instantly wanted to come back up.

"What're you talking about?" I replied, and tried to keep myself from puking.

"It's not easy for me to admit that I was actually afraid, but I was," He continued, confusing me all the more. "When you were injured, the only thing going through my mind was what would I do if you died? Here I was, pretending there was nothing there because it was simpler, it was less confounding. And then you very well could have died and I would be forced to ask myself what might have happened if I wasn't so foolish."

My silence forced him to look at me, and once he did his eyes squinted at the confusion on my face.

"What are you talking about, Cas? You're not really making any sense."

He sighed, lowering his eyes again. "No I suppose I'm not. What I'm trying to say is that I'm ready to acknowledge that there's something there... Between _us_, to be more specific."

I blinked a few times over, my face completely devoid of any sort of expression before saying, "I'm dead, aren't I?"

"What?"

"Either I'm dead, or I just need to go and get myself shot more often. Everyone's acting super crazy nice to me. First Dad holds my hand, Sam kisses my cheek, and you're..."

My words cut off when _he _leaned over and kissed me, it didn't last long considering I was laying in a hospital bed- But it was enough to numb the pain for a few seconds at least. Once he pulled away I laughed quietly.

"Yeah, I'm definitely getting shot more often."

He only smiled slightly. "I would rather you didn't."

"I agree," Dad said in the doorway with his coffee in hand. He cast one harsh look towards Cas which forced him to stand from the bed. "It was bad enough this time. Don't gotta scare the crap out of us again."

Dad returned to his previous spot beside me, practically shoving poor Cas out of the way.

"So how long do I gotta stay here?" I asked, hoping to avoid the subject of what Dad musta just saw from the hallway.

"Til you're well enough to make the ride back to the bunker." He answered.

"I'm well enough now, it's not like I'm gonna be pushing the car back to Kansas- And it's not exerting laying in the backseat." I frowned once I saw Dad's glare. "I just wanna go home. You wouldn't stay stuck in this pit if you didn't have to, Dad."

"Maybe not, but it ain't me laid up in that bed. So just do me a favor and chill out. After a day or two if you're doin okay, then we'll head back to the bunker."

Well, I wanted my normal Dad and that's what I was getting now. Actually, I couldn't have been happier about that, despite the bullet hole in my stomach and feeling like death. I think I knew what he meant now when Dad said things were gonna be different from here on out.


	27. Chapter 27

A couple days after getting shot my Doctor pretty much confirmed that I wasn't gonna die and I could go home. We didn't wait around for me to be discharged and instead sneaked out through the back.

I slept the majority of the way back to the bunker, the backseat was pretty much fashioned into a tiny bed with pillows and blankets, and poor Cas had to deal with my feet on his lap for hours at a time. It was funny cause I really didn't think he minded much. When we finally got back to the bunker I felt a million times better, but Dad still forced me to stay in bed. Everyone pretty much babied me like crazy, waiting on me hand and foot. It was nice that everyone was bein so nice to me, but I wasn't the type that wanted to be babied. It only made me feel that maybe they'd end up thinking I wasn't as strong as I tried to make myself out to be.

Since I was basically locked in my room and stuck in bed, it didn't take long for me to go crazy. Dad and Sam had started going through all the crap in the storage room, and the file room downstairs without me. I'm not sure what they were looking for exactly, but I wanted to go and help out.

Turns out sneaking my way out of my room was impossible.

"What the hell?" Dad barked, carrying a big dusty cardboard box. "What're you doin up?"

I skidded to a stop and tried to flash an innocent smile, but he never fell for that.

"I'm bored-" I whined. "And I wanna help."

"You wanna help?" He replied. "Then go get back in bed. I can't concentrate if I'm worrying you're up running around." He pursed his lips at me. "Don't make me call Cas in here again."

Whining apparently wasn't gonna work on Dad either, so I turned and stomped my way back to my room and he followed. I was still sore as fuck, so in a way it was nice to stay in bed, but that still didn't change the fact that I felt like a worthless lump of crap.

"Here," Dad said, laying the box down on the bed beside me. "You wanna help out, then go through this. See if you can find any info on the weapons downstairs, okay?"

"At least it's something," I sighed, pulling the box closer. "Have you guys found anything interesting yet?"

"Just a bunch of old artifacts, like some Kings snuff box and some weird lookin idols. Nothing that can help with our Lucifer problem anyway." He waited before leaving my room. "You need anything while I'm here? Food or something?"

"No, I'm good, Dad. Really, I'm not dying I don't know why you're keeping me locked in here."

He only sneered at me as he started for the door. "I'll send Cas in here to help you out with all that crap..." Now he paused and the sneer faded. "Don't do anything stupid, leave the door open."

"Jesus..." I muttered. "Like I'm a frickin twelve year old."

After he was gone I pulled the lid off the box and practically choked on a cloud of dust. The Men of Letters were geniuses in their field, but seriously- They fucking sucked at organizing their shit. If it wasn't boxes stacked in random corners without any labels, it was old porno magazines mixed in with important documents. This box had what looked like hundreds of folders, some with their contents spilled out and mixing with other folders crap. I grabbed a random stack of papers and started scaling through them when Cas walked in.

"Dean asked me to help you." He said.

"Yeah, we got our work cut out for us, dude." I replied, motioning towards the bed. "Take a seat and pick a folder."

He sat on the edge of the bed and grabbed a stack from the box and immediately started skimming through them.

"Oh yeah," I snorted. "Forgot you're a speed reader, maybe this won't take long after all."

After a quick flick of a smile he started reading again. "These are mainly documentations on past events that hold no relevance to this timeline. Certain Hunters for instance and their deaths."

"Oh..." I flicked through my pages and it seemed like basically the same thing. "Well, I guess it won't hurt to read em anyway- Never know when one might mention somethin about a weapon used or maybe a spell or whatever."

He read through a few more papers before he noticed me scratching at my bandages.

"Have you changed those today?"

"Yeah," I didn't take my eyes off the papers. "This morning. I'm gonna have a pretty wicked scar, front and back. Not sure if that's such a good thing or not. I guess I can live with it though, it's not like I don't have others."

He merely nodded before grabbing more papers. And since he was so fast at reading, it didn't take long to go through that first box and Dad to bring in a couple more.

Really, I didn't think reading could be so exhausting, but by the time dinner time came around my eyes felt like they were gonna fall out, and my head ached. Cas ditched me a couple hours prior after Dad was bitching they needed his superman strength to move some shelves in the file room. And so far, I'd found jack squat as far as anything that might be useful.

"Knock knock," Sam said, peaking around the door. "You hungry? We got pizza in the oven."

"Yeah, don't suppose you'll let me eat in the kitchen with you guys, huh?" I answered.

"Uh," He flashed a smile. "I'll ask Dean, but I doubt he'll let you out of here."

"Might as well lock me in the friggin dungeon, dude- If you're gonna keep me prisoner in here."

"That's what happens when you get shot, kiddo. You're on lock down."

He disappeared shortly after and I grabbed the last page from the second box and started reading quietly to myself.

"After a ten year long dig in the Valley of the Kings, the object in question was finally located. Blah blah blah, three men died after the walls of the tomb collapsed, blah blah blah, the Michael sword was returned..." I paused and felt my jaw drop. "To the Men of Letters safe house... Holy shit!" I scaled the rest of the writing quickly and my hands were practically shaking. "Shit shit shit!"

I kicked the covers off of me and leapt out of bed, carrying the page with me as I darted from my room and down the hallway.

"Ow ow ow ow." I muttered, holding my free hand against my gunshot wound and flying past the kitchen.

"Hey!" I heard Dad shout, and before long all three men were chasing after me.

I don't know how I was moving so fast and made it down the stairs before they could catch me, but once I hit the file room I stopped and took a good look around.

"Mary!" Dad continued to shout as he finally reached me. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I found it!" I blurted.

"Found what?" Sam replied.

"You shouldn't be out of bed," Cas said. "Especially running like that, you've probably ripped your stitches open."

"I'm fine," I glanced at the paper and moved past the shelves and the area where I knew the dungeon was hidden. "Not in the dungeon... It's farther this way."

I kept moving and they followed, confused. "Mary, seriously, are your pain meds wearing off or something?" Dad asked.

"No, you don't get it-" I shoved the paper into his hands. "I found it!"

"Wow, uh, you wanna elaborate?"

"The Michael sword."

"The... The what?" Sam grabbed the paper from Dad's hands and read over it quickly. "Holy fuck, she's not kidding."

"There's an actual sword, it was lost centuries ago and the Men of Letters were trying to track it down." I said as I ran my hands along the walls. "According to that they found it and brought it back here, and it's hidden in a secret room somewhere around here."

Sam followed and continued to read over it. "It says that they went to extreme precautions to protect it, because even the angels were after it and didn't know where it disappeared to. It's pretty much the only thing that can kill Lucifer, Michael too."

"The two most powerful archangels," Cas added. "I suppose that makes sense, although I was under the impression that they could be taken down with a regular angel blade."

"Guess you were misinformed, dude." Dad replied. "Good thing we didn't try to go after the dick with a regular angel blade. We'd be blood splatters by now."

After feeling along the stone wall I finally noticed a slight difference in height. "Cas, come here. See if this is it."

He moved over and ran his hand down the area and after lightly moving me aside, pushed against it and with a groan the wall slid inwards a good foot or so.

"Holy crap." Dad said. "How many more surprises are we gonna find in this place?"

After another effortless push it was open enough that we could squeeze inside, but Cas' steps immediately faltered.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He flinched and took a step back. "Whatever's inside is warded against angels, I can feel it from here. I can't go in."

Dad nodded and moved to the front. "Just wait here then, we'll go. Grab a flashlight Sammy."

Sam quickly snatched one from a nearby shelf and flicked it on, and Dad was the first to squeeze his way through the opening. Sam was next and then me as Cas waited outside and had no choice but to watch from the sidelines.

The room was small, barely bigger than a large closet and completely empty but for a table sitting against the wall. There was a long rectangular box on top, shiny black like volcanic glass, with Enochian sigils carved onto it.

"Yo, Cas-" Dad said. "Can you see this?"

Cas peaked around the section of wall he pushed open and eyed the box carefully. "I see it, it's what's warded against angels."

"See any scribbles that say it'll blast humans if they touch it?"

"No, not from this distance," He shook his head. "But there's no guarantee that it's safe."

Dad sighed, and approached the box. "Guess I'll be the guinea pig then."

"Hold up," Sam said, grabbing his wrist before he could touch it. "Not you... Me... I'll be the guinea pig. You got a kid to look after."

I frowned slightly, and let out a sigh. "Guys... Don't you think it'd be better if maybe I did it? What would be worse in the end, huh? Me dying, and then being born later, or you guys dying and that'd be it?"

"What kinda fucking logic is that?" Dad snapped back. "No one's dying." He then held up his fist. "Rock paper scissors."

Sam rolled his eyes and held up his fist. "You're an idiot, I don't know why we bother to do this, you suck at it."

Dad's face went completely serious, like he'd just entered a gun fight and was ready to blow some heads off. When they went the first round of their little game, Sam sighed and Dad cursed under his breath.

"Always with the scissors, Dean." Sam shook his head. "When will you learn?"

"Two outa three," Dad replied, holding his fist up a second time. "Come on."

I shook my head and walked past them and approached the box, grabbing hold of it before they could stop me... Nothing happened.

"What the fuck, Mary." Dad said, grabbing me by the shoulders and yanking me back. "You're grounded!"

My arms crossed and I arched a brow at him. "Well, someone had to do it, and at least now we know it's not gonna kill us if we touch it."

Yeah, I knew that face he was giving me- I was gonna get screamed at later. But, for the moment he wasn't gonna do it cause he moved to the box and tried to lift the lid.

"Crap, it's locked." He said, then pulled his lock pick from his pocket. "Gimme a second."

Sam and me stood back and watched as he tried to pick the lock, only to stand back straight seconds later and turn around with a flat face.

"Uh..." He said, holding up his lock pick.

The end was completely melted and disfigured.

"What the hell?" Sam said, grabbing it and eying it closely.

"The box must be spelled," Cas stated from the doorway. "To prevent anyone from breaking into it. If you don't have the actual key, then we can't open the box."

"Well that's just friggin delightful." Dad said, throwing his melted lock pick on the floor. "Does it say anything on that paper about the key?"

Sam grabbed it from his pocket and we left the room so he could read it. He sat on a random stack of boxes while we waited. Once he reached the bottom of the page he looked up at us with his forehead creased.

"Ugh, what?" I asked.

"It's not here. It says that they kept the key in another location for safety measures. Apparently even the Men of Letters had trust issues." He answered.

"Okay," Dad shrugged. "So where's the key being held?"

Sam frowned and let out a sigh. "According to this... The Men of Letters didn't only have one bunker like this. There's another one in New York, basically a place to keep the things that they thought was too risky to leave here, only a selective few new about it's location. Do you know about that, Mary?"

Another bunker? Honestly that blew my mind. I thought ours was the only one in friggin existence. But, really- I guess it wasn't all that shocking the more I thought about it. The Men of letters were a secret society sure, but they were probably pretty damn big back in the day. It'd be unreasonable to assume that they'd have only one bunker out there. Hell, there were probably dozens.

"No," I shook my head. "I wish I did know about it, but this is as big of a surprise to me as it is to you."

"So what do we do? If that place is anything like this one, we won't be able to find it." Sam said. "It'll probably be protected with a force field like this bunker is, even Cas wouldn't be able to locate it."

Dad returned to the secret room and grabbed the box then started for the stairs. We all followed him into the library where he sat it down on the table. In the light it we could see the details on the box, and I for one was actually in awe at how intricate it was. The lock was surrounded by gold, and the engravings had been painting over with it too.

"You think we can bust it open?" Dad asked.

Cas stayed as far away from it as possible, choosing to stand on the complete opposite end of the table as he gazed at it.

"I very much doubt it." He answered.

"Not even taking a sledgehammer would break it?" Sam asked now.

"No, it's spelled, breaking it would be impossible. We need the key."

Dad still tried to pry it open, but it was like trying to bust open a bank vault with your bare hands.

"There's gotta be someone alive out there that knows where this storage place is." I said. "There has to be..."

By now my injuries were screaming at me, so with a deep breath I sat down carefully, leaning to my left to avoid sitting back on the exit wound.

"Did Crowley give you any memories on the Men of Letters?" Dad asked me.

"No, he wouldn't have had any cause you guys never told him about the bunker. He was locked up here for a while, but he was blind folded in and out, so he wouldn't know."

Dad grabbed the box and returned it downstairs, since Cas couldn't even get within ten feet from it- Once he came back to the library everyone sat down and fell into silence.

With all the documents and books in this damn place you'd think there would be something that mentioned where this storage bunker would be. Or at leaxt a census of some kind of the actual members of their society. There had to be _someone _that was still alive out there that could give us info. It was hard to believe that every single man was dead.

Sam must've had the same thoughts I did, because he started back for the file room and came back with a stack of papers practically a mile high.

And he confirmed he was thinking the same thing when he said, "This is the list of the Men of Letters from the years of 1930 to 1953, if there isn't anyone left alive, then maybe there'd be family members, children, grand children, that might know something."

"Couldn't hurt to look," Dad replied. "In the mean time- Mary, I think it's time you go back to bed."

Surprisingly enough I didn't argue this time, running around like I did made me feel like crap. So I hobbled my way back to bed and fell asleep almost instantly.

* * *

_Yet again, the distant future._

* * *

The hunt had ended up being a bust, what they thought was a haunting had turned out to be a couple of stupid kids that were playing pranks- That accidentally managed to mangle a friends legs in a combine.

Over all Dean was pissed, he was bored, it'd been months since he, Sammy and Cas had an actual job that was stimulating. It didn't matter if he'd been doing this for decades, was now forty seven and was at the age a normal working man would consider retiring- He wanted to keep going. Basically, he was bored. And it wasn't so much the fact that their jobs as of late had been less than satisfying, it was the fact that he was forced to admit he was getting older- And had nothing left to show for his life other than maybe saving a few s.o.b's. Maybe to some that would've been enough, but to Dean it wasn't.

Of course that all changed that morning, after they'd left the motel and stopped at a diner to grab some breakfast. When she walked in, at first he didn't even recognize her. Her hair was shorter than the last time he'd seen her, and blonde instead of dark brown as before. And, the fact that she was carrying a car seat was a striking contrast to what he last seen her holding- Which was a bottle of Jack.

"Oh no way." Dean said, sitting up slightly.

"What?" Sam replied, turning to see what he was looking at. "You know her?"

"Yeah, remember that ghoul job we took early last year?" Sam nodded in answer. "She was the... Well, the bartender I told you about."

"Oh," Sam cringed inwardly and took a bite of his salad. "She's the twenty something girl that stole your cash?"

"Yeah, fucking bitch..." Dean scowled. "Still, was a fun night though. Wonder what she's doing here... Kinda weird."

Sam only rolled his eyes and went back to his salad. To him it was a wonder that more women he'd slept with hadn't turned up over the years since there was so many of them.

"Oh shit... She's comin over here." Dean said, sitting up and smoothing down his hair.

The woman approached the table, stopping once she set eyes on Dean and offered a small smile.

"Dean Winchester," She said, still smiling. "What a coincidence I'd find you here."

Dean smiled, but then realized he couldn't remember her name. "Uh... Yeah, life's funny that way."

"Brenda." She reminded. "I'm insulted, you'd think I'd leave more of an impact on you."

"Sorry," Dean shrugged. "It's been a while and we'd only met once."

"Once was enough," She sighed, then glanced down at Sam who had gone noticeably stiff. "So, what brings you here?"

Sam cleared his throat awkwardly, and was forced to scoot over when the woman pushed her way into the booth. The car seat she left sitting on the floor, where a sleeping baby lied.

"Oh you know, just a road trip with my brother." Dean answered, then passed a quick glance to the baby. "Cute kid."

"This is Shelby," Brenda replied, her face had suddenly gone harsh. "She's yours."

Dean suddenly choked on his burger and had to spit it back on his plate. "She's what?"

"She's yours," Brenda repeated. "The result of our one night stand last year. I guess it's a good thing I ran into you. Since you're the father you have a right to know you have a daughter out there somewhere."

Sam was wide eyed, and looked to his brother who'd gone stiff and pale.

"Come on," Dean chuckled nervously. "She's... She's not mine, she can't be."

"Keep telling yourself that, Dean- If it'll make you feel better." Brenda sighed. "But she's definitely yours. She's two months old tomorrow, do the math... And if you looked at the thing you'd see for yourself that she's yours. Looks just like you, those damn eyes are incriminating."

Dean leaned over and gawked at the kid, feeling his face go even more blank. Even though she was so tiny he could definitely see a resemblance. What little hair she had was the same color as his, and past the chubby baby cheeks everything else about her was identical to himself.

"Oh shit..." He muttered.

"Yeah," Brenda nodded. "Congrats Daddy."

"Oh shit..." He repeated.

"Look I didn't come here to freak you out, but I've been trying to find you for months. I need help with this kid, Dean. I don't have a lot of money and it's all I can do to put fucking food on the table. She's your kid, and you need to do something about it."

Dean looked to his brother who was still sitting wide eyed.

"Uh listen, sweetheart. I'm not gonna go laying cash on the table for some kid that you claim is mine. There's no proof she's mine. Yeah sure maybe she looks like me, but that doesn't mean anything." Dean spat back defensively.

When the baby started whimpering from the car seat, Brenda pulled her out with a cringe and practically threw her at Dean. He took her quickly, holding her from under her arms and out in front of him with his face blank.

"What the hell..." He muttered. "I mean... What the heck?"

"Hold her for a minute will you? I got her formula but it's not mixed, I'm going to the ladies room." Brenda said, then sifted through the diaper bag until pulling out an empty bottle and a container of formula, then stomped away.

Dean only sat there holding the baby away from him like she would bite him, and Sam still, wouldn't lose the wide eyed expression.

"What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" Dean spat, motioning his head to the baby. "This is bullshit right?"

"Uh..." Sam garbled. "I don't know, Dean. The kid does kinda look like you."

"Still doesn't mean anything." Dean finally pulled the baby closer and she stared up at him with big green eyes. "I should at least get a frickin paternity test done before I start shellin out cash to some skank bartender I only knew one god damned night."

Sam sighed, finally his expression returning to normal. His brows furrowed when he looked at the baby. "Did you see the way she looked at her? And the way she pretty much shoved her at you. Think it's pretty obvious she resents the kid."

"Yeah... I noticed." Dean replied.

"If she is yours, what're you gonna do?"

"I have no frickin idea, man. Hell, five minutes ago I didn't even know I had a kid. What am I supposed to do?"

Sam rested his elbows on the table and leaned forward, staring the baby down. "Beats me. It's not like I have any kids. If she is yours, are you gonna... I dunno, be involved in her life?"

Dean fell silent as he locked eyes with the baby's. His stomach suddenly twisted into a tight painful knot that he was ready to blame on the burger, but knew better than to believe that's what it was.

"She look kinda... _Small_ for a two month old to you?" He suddenly asked.

Sam shrugged. "I don't know. It's not like I have a lot of experience with babies."

"Feel her," He said, handing her to his brother. "She feels... Underweight."

Sam took her and let out another deep sigh. "She does feel a little underweight, Dean."

"Fuck, don't tell me she's been neglecting this kid?" Dean took her back and she huffed out a small cry.

"I hope not," Sam shook his head. "But you saw the way she was acting with her. Pretty damn obvious she doesn't like her very much." He paused and watched the way Dean was holding her. "You know, she's not a grenade that's gonna blow up in your face, and she's not poisonous- Stop holding her like that."

Dean fidgeted uncomfortably before pulling her closer- She instantly laid her head on his shoulder and began sucking her thumb.

"What's taking her so long?" Dean said, awkwardly patting the baby's back. "How long's it take to mix a frickin bottle?"

Suddenly it hit them both like a bolt of lightning to the forehead and Sam jumped up from the table.

"Wait here." He said, then rushed to the bathrooms, was gone less than thirty seconds before he returned. "She's gone."

"Gone? Check out front."

Sam rushed out the diner door, and Dean watched him rush back and forth through the parking lot before coming back inside.

"She's not there, Dean... She's gone." Sam repeated, watching his brothers face go blank. "We need to track her down, or call the police or something."

"And tell em what? That she ditched her kid with us and we wanna give her back, even though it's clear she's neglecting the kid?" Dean snapped back. "Besides, they might twist it around and say we kidnapped her or somethin."

Sam huffed and stood up straight. "Okay, so what're we gonna do? We just let her go and do what with the baby?"

She was asleep again and Dean struggled to look at her face that was smashed in his shoulder.

"I have no frickin idea. Isn't there a place for kids, like a place to leave em?"

"What, like a baby deposit box?" Sam snorted. "No, you take her to the police station, that's what you do. Then they'd probably call social services, and they'd put her in foster care."

"Shit..." Dean ran his free hand down his face. "You know how it is for kids in foster care, it's hell."

"Yeah... I know. So what the hell are we supposed to do?"

Dean thought it over for a moment before standing. "Grab that... That baby bag thing-"

"Diaper bag." Sam corrected.

"Whatever, and her chair thing-"

"Car seat." Sam corrected again.

"Yeah, okay... We're gonna find a Doctors office and first thing's first is I'm gonna get a paternity test done, and get her checked out."

Sam grabbed the bag and car seat and followed him to the door. "Okay, and if she's yours... Then what?"

"Then... I guess we take her home."

Sam's feet skidded to a stop beside the Impala. "Are you serious? Take her home?"

"What else are we supposed to do with her? If she's my kid I can't just dump her off on someone's doorstep, and I can't let her go into foster care gettin tossed around from family to family." He stood back while Sam opened the back seat door and strapped the car seat in. "I dunno. Maybe it ain't a good idea. It's not like the bunker's baby proofed, and it sure as hell isn't a normal home for a kid. Not to mention that we don't know anything about babies, we're Hunters and the kids life would be nothing but crap living with us."

Sam sighed and climbed out of the car. "Yeah, all of those are good points, but... Would you really want strangers raising her? Would you wanna take the chance of her going to someone that might abuse her or neglect her? Especially since it seems her Mother was already doing that."

"No, but what else am I supposed to do? I can't be a Dad, I don't know the first thing about it."

Sam rolled his eyes at him. "Yeah you do, Dean. You raised me, and you were just a kid at the time. And you lived with Lisa and Ben for a year."

"That was different. Ben wasn't a baby." He leaned in the back and laid her in the car seat, struggling for a good two minutes in strapping her in. "Let's just go to a damn doctor and get this shit over with, then we'll decide what we're gonna do."

"This isn't a _we _decision, Dean-" Sam replied. "This is your decision to make. She's your daughter, this is on _you_."

Dean sighed, pausing in the back seat when she woke up and peered at him. He stared back with his brows pushed together and it seemed as though she was examining everything about his face.

"Yeah, uh..." He cleared his throat. "Just sit tight, kid."

He quickly climbed in the front seat and fired up the engine, then peeled out of the diners drive and started zipping through town.

It took a good hour before he finally found a pediatricians office, and after parking and grabbing the car seat from the back, started inside with Sam following.

"Okay, so how do I go about this?" Dean asked, pushing the doors open and setting inside.

"You think I know?" Sam replied. "Like I said, I don't have kids either."

Dean grumbled his way to the front desk, and he sat the car seat on top and let out a sigh.

"Can I help you, Sir?" The receptionist said with a smile.

"Yeah, uh... I got this kid. Her Mom died a few days ago and she left her with me, she said she's mine... I don't know if she is... What can I do about that?"

Sam rubbed his temples at hearing his brother and the receptionist, whose name tag said "Cindy" was equally confounded.

"Oh... Well there's always paternity tests, Sir. We do preform those here if that's what you'd like to do?" She said.

"Yeah," Dean nodded adamantly. "Gotta do that, and uh... Well, like I said her Mom died a few days ago so I don't know anything about the baby. I wanted to get her checked out, make sure she's healthy."

She smiled and leaned over, looking the baby over. "Alright, well you need to fill out these forms," She then handed him a clipboard. "And we'll need a copy of her birth certificate and proof that she's had her vaccinations."

Dean stopped with the clipboard in his hands. "I don't have a copy of her birth certificate and I don't know if she's had vaccinations. Her Mom never told me any of that."

Cindy sighed and nodded. "Okay, well I'm sure we can work something out. What's the little girls name?"

Dean stared down at the baby who was gawking up at him with a goofy little smile. "Mary Winchester." He answered.

Sam's brows rose and he fought back a smile.

"How old is the child?"

"Two months tomorrow, apparently."

"Okay, well just fill out those forms as best as you can, then bring them back to me- We'll get you in as soon as a room's free." She finished with a smile.

Dean only nodded before grabbing the car seat from the desk and moving into the waiting area, taking a seat next to a large fish tank.

"Mary?" Sam said, sitting beside him. "Thought her name was Shelby?"

"That name's friggin awful," Dean snapped back. "If she's gonna be stickin around I'm sure as hell not calling her Shelby." Dean started in with the forms. "How the hell am I supposed to answer these questions? I don't know if she has any allergies, if she's been sick... I don't even know what her last name was, where she was born... Nothing."

"Just do the best you can." Sam replied. "She's just getting a check up anyway."

Dean only sighed as he continued jotting whatever he could down, once he was finished he turned the forms in and returned to his seat.

Both men were uncomfortable surrounded by Mother's with screaming children. Several were playing at a toy box in the middle of the floor, others were climbing on the empty chairs- One was mercilessly pounding on the fish tank while picking his nose.

When Mary started crying both Dean and Sam went stiff.

"Uh..." Sam said. "Maybe you should pick her up?"

"And do what? Sweet talk her into not crying?" Dean retorted.

"She's probably hungry, or needs her diaper changed. Do something. Everyone's looking at us like we're child abusers."

Dean leaned forward and rocked the car seat a little. "Mary, calm down. It's not that bad. Stop crying."

But she didn't, she continued to cry before letting out a wail that practically shattered the windows. Dean reached down and unstrapped her, scooping her up- The crying instantly stopped.

"Okayyy." Dean said, clearing his throat. "Now what?"

Sam started digging through the diaper bag before pulling out a bottle. "Give her this."

Dean took it and ripped the lid off, then pushed it to her mouth. She took it immediately and chugged at it like a starving animal.

"Damn... Kid _was_ hungry. Wonder when the last time was that bitch fed her." Dean said.

"Who knows." Sam stared down at her and smiled slightly. "You know, she does look exactly like you, Dean. Except for the pink onesie."

Dean couldn't help but nod in agreement. She did look like him, it was impossible to ignore.

"Mary Winchester?" A nurse said from the doorway.

Both men stood and Sam grabbed the car seat and diaper bag, following Dean back to the room.

"Okay, first time check up," The nurse said. "Let's get that onesie off of her. Go ahead and lay her on the table."

Dean hesitated, and said. "Uh, is that safe?"

"She'll be fine, you can stand with her, but the Doctor's going to need to examine her and then weigh her."

Minutes later the baby was laying on the table in nothing but her diaper, kicking her legs and waving her arms. Dean kept his hand on the middle of her stomach, thinking she'd suddenly roll off the table. When a middle aged woman with thick glasses and wiry gray hair stepped in, she gave a big smile.

"Hello, I'm Doctor Clark" She closed the door and approached the table. "And is this Mary?"

"Uh, yeah." Dean replied.

"Aw, she's a cutie-" Doctor Clark exclaimed, then started in with the examination. "Looks to be a little underweight, has she been eating okay?"

Dean and Sam exchanged glances before Dean cleared his throat and answered. "Actually, I don't really know, Doc. You see, I didn't have her until a couple days ago when I found out her Mom died."

"Oh... I'm sorry to hear that," She scooped Mary up and laid her on a scale on the counter. "Okay, she's 8.6 pounds, so she is underweight. I'd advise getting her on a formula that has a higher caloric intake."

"Yeah got it." Dean sighed, staring down at the kid. Apparently she _had _been neglected by her Mother. "How is she other than that?"

"Seems to be a healthy little girl," She returned Mary to the table and tickled her feet. "So you wanted a paternity test, right?"

"Yeah, kinda need to know if she's mine."

"Alright, well- I'll have everything set up and you should be in and out of here within the next ten minutes." Before she left she grabbed her stethoscope and listened to the baby's heart beat and breathing, then took a peak in her ears and nose. "Like I said, she seems to be a healthy little girl."

After the Doctor left Dean and Sam both struggled to get her back in her onesie, and once they were finished she started crying again- Until Dean picked her up. She yet again laid her head on his shoulder and started sucking her thumb.

"She seems to like you already," Sam said, his eyes sympathetic. "Guess it's kind of understandable though if her Mom hasn't been giving her any affection at all."

"Yeah," Dean muttered. "I have half a mind to hunt that bitch down and show her the same treatment. She's been starving this kid and treating her like crap."

Sam moved closer and bent to eye level with her, she immediately grinned. "Even though I'm pretty sure she's yours, what are you gonna do if she happens to not be?"

"I have no idea." Dean answered. "Keeping her would be crazy, right?"

"Maybe, might be crazier to dump her off on someone else though. It's not like she's a puppy, this is a human being, Dean."

"I know... And she sure as hell didn't ask for any of this."

But keeping her would've been stupid, since they were Hunters and had no business raising a baby.

A nurse entered the room next, pushing a small metal table. She took a cheek swab from Dean and one from the baby, then started for the door.

"Wait," Dean said. "How long's this gonna take?"

"Shouldn't be too long of a wait. Maybe three days."

"Three days?" Dean barked back. "I can't wait that long, you gotta put a rush on this thing."

"I'm sorry, hon- But we can't. That's as long as it takes." She opened the door. "You can take the papers up to the front desk and then you're all done here."

After another smile she left the room, and once Sammy grabbed the diaper bag and car seat they made their way back for the desk. Dean paid the bill and now the only thing they could do was leave- So they strapped her back in her car seat and Dean peeled out of the drive.

"Three frickin days," He spat. "What the fuck are we supposed to do in the mean time?"

"Guess we just go back to the motel," Sam sighed. "Wait it out, and then afterwards you can decide what you're gonna do."

* * *

Three days later they were camped out in the motel room, and Dean was surprised that he wasn't more exhausted than he was. Mary was a surprisingly good baby, she didn't cry in the middle of the night and mainly only fussed when she was hungry.

At the moment she was laying in the middle of the bed on her stomach, her head bobbing around as she tried to look at the tv. After several long minutes she let out a high pitched squeal.

"I know," Dean said from his spot on the bed. "This show sucks."

She jabbered something in return and he snorted. "I'd find cartoons if there was anything worth watchin, but there ain't." He sat up and patted her back. "So you hungry or what? It's been a couple hours since you ate."

Now he scooped her up and grabbed her bottle on the nightstand, just as always she took it and started chugging.

"You're pretty cute for a screaming little poop machine." He then sighed. "Sorry your Mom was such a bitch, you don't deserve that." She only stared up at him, and just as she had been doing, examined every part of his face, then reached a wobbly hand out and latched onto his thumb. He sighed after that and shook his head. "You're not makin this easy kid. You shouldn't get attached to me, I still don't know what I'm gonna do with ya yet."

When the motel door open and Sam walked back in carrying several bags, he finally stood from the bed.

"Got everything I think," Sam said, laying the bags on the table. "More diapers, more clothes for her, formula and all that."

"Did you get my stuff?" Dean replied.

"Uh, yeah. Got your baby food too." He then waved a fast food bag in the air. "Bacon cheeseburger and fries."

"Awesome."

Sam tossed his jacket aside then held his arms out. "I'll take her so you can eat."

Dean handed her over and then sat down. Mary gave another goofy smile once Sam made a face at her.

"So, still no call yet, huh?" Sam asked, sitting across from his brother.

"Nope. Not yet."

"Maybe you should call them? Sometimes they get swamped."

Dean took a bite of his burger and stared aimlessly out the window. "Yeah, maybe."

But he was hesitant to make that call, because a part of him was dreading finding out the truth. It scared him to think that Mary might not actually be his.

Sam eyed his brother closely, feeling his forehead crease in concern. "You want me to call?"

Dean nodded slightly, laying his burger down. "Yeah, go ahead if you really want."

Sam nodded and grabbed his phone from his pants pocket and quickly dialed. Mary was occupied by playing with a button on his shirt so she was silent.

"Yeah, I'm calling about the results of a paternity test," Sam said after someone picked up. "Dean Winchester. Yes I'll hold." He let out a sigh and rose his brows, trying to give Dean a reassuring nod. Thirty long seconds later he sat up straight. "Yes, I'm still here..." He paused, his forehead creasing yet again. "Are you sure about that, there couldn't have been any mistakes?" Another pause. "Alright, thank you so much."

And then he hung up and Dean only sat there gaping at him. "Well?"

Sam smiled faintly. "She's definitely your daughter. No doubt about it."

Dean heaved out a deep sigh. "Wow... Okay... So... That's that."

Sam snorted. "That's that? You find out you have a daughter and that's all you have to say?"

"I'm tryin to let it all sink in, Sammy." He pushed his burger aside. "And, now we gotta figure out what we're gonna do- Cause whether you'll admit it or not, it's not just me this is gonna affect. Takin this kid with us is gonna change all our lives. Yours, mine, hell even Cas'."

"Cas..." Sam suddenly sat up. "Did you ever call him and tell him about this?"

"No, just told him the engine in the Impala blew up and we were gonna be a few more days."

Yet again Sam snorted. "And he fell for that?"

"Dude's an angel, he don't know nothin about cars, so yeah." He stood from the table and took the baby back from Sam. "Okay, so let's talk about this. Weigh out the pros and cons."

"Seriously? You want a pros and cons list to keeping a baby?" Sam followed him to the bed where he laid Mary down. She stared up at them grinning and kicking her legs. "Need I remind you that she's not a puppy?"

"I know!" Dean barked back, which made the baby flinch. "But this is serious, man. Not only are we not in any way shape or form prepared for raising a damn baby, but look at us? We're gettin up there. I'm almost fifty, it'd be different if I was in my twenties or thirties."

"Men older than you have had babies, Dean-" Sam replied. "Clint Eastwood had a baby well up into his sixties, and we all know how much you love him."

Dean smiled slightly before shaking it off. "Not a valid point, Sammy. Seriously, we need to talk about this. Okay, so... We take her home and then what? Just stop hunting, or take the baby on jobs? No, we can't do either of those things. And it's not like I can just hire a babysitter at the bunker. I don't wanna be like Dad, if I have a kid, I'm not gonna go runnin off for days or weeks at a time and leave her with perfect strangers. And I sure as hell don't wanna treat her like Dad treated us. I don't want her to feel like she's a soldier, barking out orders and making her call me "Sir". Hell no." He sighed and ran his hand down his face. "And I sure as hell don't wanna raise her to be a Hunter, but I also don't want her to grow up not knowin how to protect herself. So, what the fuck am I supposed to do?" Even though it made his stomach twist, he had to spit it out. "I can't raise her, Sammy. It wouldn't be fair to her. She deserves a normal life, a normal family."

Sam sighed, nodding slightly. "Well, I can't tell you what to do, Dean. It's your call."

"Yeah," Dean turned away and started pacing. "I wish it wasn't." He stopped and refused to turn around. "So... Where do we take her?"

"Uh... I would say a social service office instead of the police station. Don't wanna take the risk of them holding us for anything."

Dean nodded and grabbed his jacket. "Okay, let's go get this over with then."

* * *

They'd been parked outside the building for a good fifteen minutes and Dean hadn't climbed out of the car. Instead, he kept his eyes fixed on the doors with his jaw clenched, while the baby made cooing noises from the backseat. Sam hadn't spoken either, because he knew exactly what was happening. His brother was changing his mind, and he wasn't going to say anything that might interfere with that, but he did want to coax him in the right direction.

"Dean," He said. "We've been out here a while now... What are you gonna do?"

"Gimme a friggin minute." He bit back.

After turning slightly and resting his arm against the back of the seat, he glanced back at Mary that was chewing on a baby keyring. She grinned when she noticed him looking at her, which resulted in Dean's brows furrowing together.

His entire life the only thing he cared about was family, everything he ever did he did _because _of family. First his Dad and Sam, then after their Dad was gone Sam and Cas. But this was completely different, he knew for certain now that someone was gonna be depending solely on him. In a way he actually liked the thought of that, having someone that depended on him, someone that would always be there- Having someone waiting for him when he came home from a job was a hell of a lot better then coming home to no one.

"Fuck it." He said, then turned and started the car.

"What're we doing?" Sam asked, not that he didn't already know.

"Goin home." Dean answered, then peeled away from the building.

* * *

When they pulled to a stop in front of the bunker door, Dean climbed out and grabbed the baby from the backseat and started for the door. Sam was left to lug everything else as they stepped inside and headed down the stairs, stopping in the library.

"Yo Cas!" Dean shouted. "We're back!"

Sam laid everything on the table, along with the car seat, huffing out a deep breath when Cas finally rounded the corner and stepped inside.

"How was the..." He stopped, his eyes locking onto the baby. "What's that?"

"A Velociraptor," Dean retorted. "It's a baby, what the hell does it look like?"

"Yes I can clearly see it's a baby, Dean- But why is there a baby here?" Cas moved forward, leaning over and glaring into her face, she responded to that by reaching over and grabbing a handful of his hair. "Dean... She's ripping my hair out, make it stop."

"She ain't an _it_, Cas. This is Mary." He turned and held her out. "My daughter."

Cas' face went blank and he fell silent, as the baby hovered in front of him kicking her legs. The silence was so prominent everyone halfway expected to hear crickets in the background.

"Your daughter? You were only gone a week?" Cas finally replied.

"Yeah, long story but... Here she is, and she's stickin around so you better get used to it." He arched his brows at Cas, holding Mary out farther. "Take her."

"What, me?" Cas took a step back. "Why?"

"Cause, like I said, she's stickin around and you need to get used to a baby. So take her."

"That's not a good idea, Dean. I don't know anything about children." Cas waved his hands in front of him while continuing to back away.

Dean kept moving forward holding Mary out until Cas backed into a wall.

"Seriously, dude. A baby? You're scared of a frickin baby?" Dean chuckled.

"I'm certainly not afraid of a baby, Dean- I just... I'm not exactly the type that bonds very well with children."

"Get over it," He held her out farther until Cas was forced to take her. Just as Dean had in the beginning he held her out in front of him awkwardly with his eyes squinted. "Mary, meet Cas, your new Guardian angel."


	28. Chapter 28

Ever since I was a kid Dad was always over protective of me. If I scraped my knee, he'd act like I'd been shot- If I had a cold or just a stuffy nose, he'd keep me on bed rest for a week. So I guess I should've been used to being babied like this- Considering I actually _had_ gotten shot this time. Thankfully though after a week of being home at the bunker he was starting to let me get up and move around.

I was basically back to my old self, and had been helping them still with everything in the file room. Honestly I didn't think ten years would be enough time to go through and sort everything out. I for one was overwhelmed, and it didn't take long to realize everyone else was too. Even Cas who was a speed reader seemed to be getting pissed at us getting absolutely frickin no where.

"Nothing," Sam said with a sigh, sitting back after pushing the papers away. "Not one damn person on that list is still alive. Seriously, how is that possible?"

"Good question, you'd think the Men of Letters would've procreated and they would have some sort of family out there that would know something." Cas replied.

Dad was cranky, just as we all were, and he scowled down at the table like he wanted to bitch slap it.

"You found nothin online either?" He asked.

"Only one thing," Sam answered. "A fire back in the fifties, some building in Illinois where a few men died." He shrugged and rubbed his temples. "It was documented here somewhere in this crap ton of papers, but there's really not much information. It's weird, because everything else I found that had something to do with some big blow up with this society was written about in excruciating detail. Not this one... Even though several of their members died in the fire, it's like they didn't want to document it. Almost like it was swept under the rug."

Dad huffed. "Wonder why that is? Where's the building at exactly?"

"Normal Illinois," Sam tapped his fingers on the table. "Google search says it's a comic book shop now or something."

I leaned my head on my hand and let out a sigh. "Think maybe it's worth checking out? If that building is anything like this place, there's bound to be secret rooms and crap like that?"

"Doubt they'd be very secret now, Mary-" Sam retorted. "Not after that fire in the fifties. The entire place was renovated, pretty much from the inside out."

"Awesome," I grumbled, thumping my forehead on the table. "So back to square one."

"But what about under the building?" Dad said. "Might be a bunker or something under there that no one could bust into. If it's like this place you gotta have a key. Not that we'd be any better off with that, since we wouldn't have the damn key for that either." He grumbled. "Frickin Men of Letters and their damn locks."

"Well we gotta do something," I said, still with my forehead on the table. "We can't just sit here while Lucifer runs around destroying everything."

When I finally pulled my face off the table I noticed Cas with his eyes squinted and head tilted.

"It's strange that everything has been so quiet out there since Lucifer was let out," He said. "It makes me wonder what exactly he's planning."

Dad and Sam nodded in agreement before Dad asked. "What happened when this happened before, Mary? Ya know, from the stories I told you in the future?"

"Uh," I blew out a huff of air. "Well, he didn't give a shit about killing anyone, that's for damn sure. He pretty much wastes an entire fucking town just to let Death on the loose."

"And were we present for that?" Cas replied.

"Yeah, you were stuck in a ring of holy fire, Lucifer was grilling you about somethin, I dunno. Dad and Sam were with some friends of theirs and they ended up getting killed."

Dad sat up straight. "Wait, which friends?"

I thought for a moment, then shrugged. "I'm not sure, you didn't like talkin about it. All I know is that it was two women."

"Two women?" Sam replied. "Ellen and Jo maybe?"

"Maybe, I don't know." I shrugged again.

Dad sat back again with his lips flattened into a thin line. "What the fuck were we even doin in that town in the first place?"

Yeah yeah yeah, I should've told them about this a long ass time ago- But really, it was fucking hard to remember all of these stories, especially since I now had Crowley's memories mixed along in there.

"You met with Crowley since he had the colt, he gave it to you because he wanted the devil dead just as much as you did. So you went to that town to kill him. But it backfired on you, cause Lucifer can't be killed with the colt."

Now all three men were gawking at me, and I wondered if maybe I'd said something wrong. It got to the point where I sat back and fidgeted in my seat just to avoid their eyes.

"Okay," Dad sighed. "At least we know that ain't an option now."

"Yeah," Sam shook his head. "It was a stupid idea anyways."

I blinked a few times over before it finally dawned on me. "Wait... You guys were already planning that?"

"Yes," Cas answered. "It was something we'd discussed since we can't open the box."

My mouth formed a silent O, and I felt a shiver run through me. To think that if I hadn't of remembered that, and we actually went on that mission, everyone could've died and it would've been all my fault. Damn...

"So, what're our other options then?" Dad asked, directing that question to me.

"Other than the Michael sword that we can't get to?" I grumbled. "The rings from the horsemen. But, then that just ends up with Sammy saying yes and jumping in the cage, and I'm sure we all don't want that."

"Yeah, last thing we wanna do is cross that bridge," Dad agreed. "We gotta think of somethin else that won't end up with us being their damn angel condoms."

"Well I mean if things end up the way they did before, Adam ends up being Michael's vessel." I said, frowning down at the table.

Yet again, everyone fell completely silent and I looked up to see Dad and Sam's faces blank.

"Oh god dammit!" I spat. "I seriously need to frickin keep track of everything I'm telling you guys!"

"Adam?" Sam said, his eyes wide. "You mean our dead brother?"

"Yeah," I rubbed my head. "Sorry, I thought I told you..."

"How the fuck does that end up happening?" Dad asked.

Cas let out a deep sigh. "I'm sure I can answer that... Zachariah."

"Bingo-" I nodded. "He gets it into his head that he can motivate _you_-" I pointed to Dad. "Into saying yes if he brings Adam back and cons him into being Michael's vessel. All this crap happens and when you guys show up to rescue him, somehow Adam ends up being possessed anyways. And... That's how Michael got locked in the cage with Sam, because of Adam."

"Okay so not only does Sammy get stuck in there, but Adam too?" Dad shook his head. "I hate our lives."

It was hard to believe our lives were actually real. Seriously, how much crazy shit can happen to a family? What's next? Unicorns falling from the sky? Honestly it wouldn't have surprised me.

"Well we don't have to worry about that happening," Sam said with maximum puppy eyes. "Because I don't intend on saying yes to Lucifer... Ever."

I sat there chewing on my bottom lip, my fingernails nervously tapping on the arms of the chair, because, uh... Yeah- There was so much more crap I needed to tell them. But it seemed kinda mean to be bombarding them with so much info from out of no where.

"Say it," Dad said, obviously he noticed my expression. "What else is there?"

Oh there was a shit ton of things I needed to tell them, but for the moment just decided to stick with what was actually happening now.

"Uh, well... It's what happens if Sam actually does end up saying yes and jumping in the cage." I started and they were yet again gawking at me. "Since there wasn't a way for you to get him out of there, Dad- Cas kinda did it. He busted in there and dragged Sam out, but somethin went wrong and he didn't pull _all _of him out."

Dad cringed and eyed Sam up and down. "Gross, what got left behind?"

Yeah, typical Dad trying to make a joke out of something he knew was gonna traumatize him later. I guess that was his way of mentally preparing for the bullshit.

"His soul," I answered and Cas immediately sat up straight. "His soul got left in the cage with Lucifer and Michael for over a year. And during that year Sam was up here goin all terminator and mega hunter. Basically he was a fucking nut job because since he didn't have a soul he didn't give a crap about anything- Including you," I motioned to Dad. "He let you believe he was dead for that whole year."

Dad's lips parted but he couldn't seem to form words, and poor Sam looked downright devastated. Cas, well... I was pretty sure his eyes were gonna bug out of his head from surprise.

"If Sam's soul was trapped with Lucifer and Michael for an entire year... How was he ever normal again after that?" Cas asked.

I couldn't look at Dad or Sam right now, their expressions were breaking my heart.

"Dad made a deal with Death somehow, and he went and grabbed Sam's soul- But it was so damaged from all the tortures it wasn't safe to put it back in him. So he put a wall up in Sam's mind, to keep him from remembering everything that happened down there. Really, it was dangerous and Dad knew that- But he had to do it. Sam had absolutely no conscience and tried to kill Bobby, and all this other shit happened, I dunno."

By now Sam wouldn't peel his eyes off his lap, and at a quick glance I could see his hands clenched into fists.

"So did that work?" Dad asked, and his voice was low and quiet.

"For a while, but something happens and the wall got broken." I answered.

"How?" Sam asked, finally looking at me. "How'd it get broken?"

That I wasn't going to answer, because if they found out Cas flipped out and broke it then they would never ever trust him again. Cas knew now what he did after the apocalypse ended, he knew he made the wrong choices by teaming up with Crowley and trying to take the souls from purgatory, so I knew now that he wouldn't ever try to do it. But that still didn't erase the fact that if Dad and Sam found out what he did, they'd probably kick his ass to the curb.

"I don't know," I lied. "It might've just dissolved on its own, I'm not sure."

Cas squinted at me, and he obviously knew I was lying, so I quickly looked away from him to avoid his penetrating stares.

"Well this settles it," Dad said, standing. "We gotta find that damn key. Pack your shit, we're going to Illinois. Chances are we won't find anything in that old Men of letters building, but we're gonna look anyways."

He stomped out of the library seconds after, and Sam stood and followed in his direction, but stopped before leaving.

"Mary," He said, then looked back at me. "Thank you."

I went slack jawed. "Uh, for what?"

"For coming back here... For trying to change everything that happened." He sighed, his forehead creasing. "I don't know how I ever lived with everything I did, but... No matter what it's not gonna happen a second time."

And now he left the library and yet again I slammed my forehead into the table. Fuck... If they took this info that badly, how the hell were they ever gonna cope with everything else that happened? I felt like a frickin evil bitch coming back here and telling them all these horrible things that went down. Yeah, I was trying to help and stop it from actually happening, but it's like I was the fucking messenger of death. I hated seeing their expressions after I spit all this shit out, it was excruciating. Cutting my heart out with a butter knife would have been less painful I was certain.

Now I stood and started for my room, and I wasn't surprised when Cas followed- Because he was gonna start questioning me about why I lied about Sam's wall supposedly "dissolving".

When I pushed my door open and started taring through my dresser he stood off to the side with his arms crossed, glaring at me. Maybe if I ignored that cute little face I wouldn't have to tell him the truth? But dammit, his eyes were just as bad as Sam's- He'd look at you and you'd melt into a puddle. Seriously, those two, they had lethal weapons on their damn faces.

So I tried to avoid looking at him as I shoved clothes into my duffel, before grabbing an actual outfit to wear today. I'd been lazing around in my sweats since I got shot, so I wasn't looking forward to my uncomfortable jeans again. My wounds hadn't healed completely yet, it was gonna chafe.

"Mary," He finally spoke and I felt myself flinch. "How did it really happen?"

"What?" I faked ignorance, which was pointless since I sucked ass at it.

"You know what-" He replied. "How did Sam's wall really break?"

I barely passed him a glance before shrugging. "I told you, I'm not sure."

"And you're lying," He stomped over. "Tell me how it happens so I can prevent it if that time comes."

"No." I shook my head. "Cause it's not gonna come around to that. Sammy's not gonna jump in that cage, we're gonna find another way out of this."

He grabbed my shoulder and spun me around to face him. "Mary... Tell me, please."

I still tried to avoid looking at him but it was impossible, finally I sighed and rubbed my head. "Dammit. I'm gonna start forcing you to wear friggin sunglasses," He squinted after that statement. "Cas, why ask when you already know the answer? It should be pretty damn obvious by now."

He swallowed once over. "So it was me?"

I nodded. "Yeah, it was when you were trying to bust into purgatory. Dad and Sam were trying to stop you, so you broke Sam's wall to keep them off your back."

He looked away and focused on something or nothing in the corner of my room. "And what happened after that? Did I at least correct my mistake?"

"Yeah, after a while you did. After the leviathan busted out of you you disappeared. Everyone thought you were dead- But, a few months later you turned up living with some woman you married, and you had amnesia or something. You couldn't remember anything that happened. Dad found you cause you were goin around calling yourself a faith healer, and by then Sammy was pretty much dead cause of hell spilling loose in his head," I paused and Cas' eyes were firmly clamped shut. "Once he found you he freaked out, cause you didn't remember him, and he was afraid you would take off before you could fix Sam. I dunno, long story short you ended up telling him that Sam's wall couldn't be rebuilt, so instead you took on all of Sam's crap, absorbed it or something."

After sighing he finally opened his eyes again. "Then I deserved that completely. I can't believe I would actually stoop to such a low level and break Sam's wall. How did they ever forgive me for something like that? Sam especially."

I couldn't answer that question, cause I honestly didn't know myself. Yeah, I loved Cas, and I knew Dad and Sam did too, but there's a limit that people would hit after a while of crap being strewn at them. I'd like to think that I could forgive him if he did something drastic like that to me, I mean- How could I not? It's Cas we're talkin about here.

"Cause you're family," I shrugged, finally coming up with some kind of response. "And that's what family does."

"But something like this..."

"It's not like we all haven't made mistakes," I interrupted. "Trust me, there's some pretty heavy shit that goes down in the future, you're not the only one that made bad choices."

He only nodded slightly, before his brows furrowed. "I was married?"

I snorted and started stuffing more clothes in my bag. "Yeah, don't get me started on that."

"I honestly don't understand how that could have happened."

Stopping with a wadded up pair of jeans in my hands, I gawked at him. "Why not?"

He only stared at me with no expression what so ever, and didn't speak- Before Dad stopped by my door and knocked on the wall.

"You ready?" He asked.

"Yep," I answered, lugging my bag over my shoulder. "All packed."

"Good, let's hit the road."

* * *

We had the car positioned just on the street not even a block away from the building, and for the last half hour we just... _Sat _there- like we were on a friggin stakeout. Dad and Sam both had their eyes fixed on what we could see of the door, which was positioned in a pretty shady looking alley.

"So, I was thinkin," Dad said, finally breaking the silence. "This fire that supposedly happened back in the fifties, you'd think there might be some sign of that. Renovated or not, this place looks... Pretty solid."

"When was it supposed to have been renovated?" I asked.

"Just after the fire, supposedly." Sam answered. "It said it was basically leveled and had to be built from the ground up, but... It still has all of the old decor from when it was built in the 1800's. You'd think that would've been destroyed if it was such a horrible fire."

"Your knowledge of decor is worrying me, Sammy-" Dad chuckled. "But yeah. Not to mention that there's no info anywhere else on a fire that killed several people."

"I made some calls when we stopped for gas," Sam went on. "A man that at the time was the Captain at the fire house, I asked him if he recalled a fire on this street, _ever_... He said no- But you could argue that since he's well into his eighties his memory might not be top notch." He sighed. "Anyway, other than that short article in the paper, there wasn't anything else about the fire- And the families of the men that supposedly died in there just completely vanished after whatever happened."

Dad tapped his hands on the steering wheel. "Yeah that's not suspicious at all. So where are these guys buried?"

"Uh," Sam grabbed the old news article he printed up. "Just outside of town, Wandering Hills Cemetery."

Finally Dad opened his door. "Okay, we're gonna check that out once we're done here. Let's go."

We left the car with Cas bringing up the rear, and stopped just outside the door of the comic books store.

Dad had just reached for the handle when he stopped and leaned in closer.

"What's that?" He asked to no one in particular, then with a swipe ripped off a sign that in the middle of the door.

Underneath it was what was left of a symbol carved into the wood. By the looks of it it seemed someone had tried to scratch it away, and it'd been painted over at least a dozen times.

"I recognize that," Sam said. "It's the Aquarian Star, from what I read it was the symbol for the Men of letters."

"Then I suppose that means we have the right place." Cas replied.

"Tells me even more that there wasn't a fire here," Dad added. "If this place burned to the ground, what're the chances the fucking door would still be intact?"

Not likely, but we all knew that.

The first thing I noticed when we stepped inside was the blaring heavy metal music, then of course the dozens of posters tacked up on the walls. Overall the place was pretty run down from being so old and smelled like toxic mold. Whether there had actually been a fire here or not, I didn't know- And since it had been over fifty years it supposedly happened, there really wasn't a way to tell. But now that we were inside, I really didn't think we'd find any secret rooms. Still, Dad led the way in past the entrance and towards a room off to the right where the register was and a girl in goth makeup stood.

She was casually leaning on the counter flicking through a magazine when she spotted us.

"Hey," She said. "Can I help you find anything?"

"We're just looking, thanks." Sam replied with a smile.

She was watching us with a strange expression, I guess cause we didn't really fit the descriptions of comic book readers. Cas especially, who was standing in the middle of the room gawking at everything around him really stood out. Dad ended up grabbing him by the coat sleeve and yanking him away just so the girl would stop watching us.

One good thing about being shot, actually the _only _good thing about me getting shot, was Dad and Cas seemed to be on pretty damn good terms now. Dad wasn't biting his head off for any little thing anymore, and had actually started joking around with him. Not that Cas got any of the jokes, but it was nice he was involved in them at least.

Since it was apparent there was nothing up here that could help us out, I approached the counter and gave half a smile.

"Where's the ladies room?" I asked.

"Downstairs," The girl answered, not taking her eyes off the magazine. "Down the hall on the right, basement stairs."

Good, I was wanting to see if this place had a basement, and using the cover of having to pee was perfect for snooping. Before leaving I passed Dad a look and he gave a nod, already knowing what I was gonna do.

There weren't many people in here thankfully, so I wouldn't have to worry about someone catching me. The stairs were at the end of the hall, sectioned off with a blanket hanging as a door. After making sure no one was watching me, I started down the stairs and into the basement which was overloaded with boxes stuffed with comics and figurines. The bathroom was right in plain site, but I moved past them and maneuvered my way around boxes and shelves.

Even down in the basement there wasn't any signs of a fire- Sometimes you'd find some old charred pieces of wood or soot stains on the walls, but there wasn't. The bricks still had slivers of white paint flecking off, and the floors were solid concrete littered with cracks. When I came across an area towards the back of the basement, I slowed my steps.

This section of wall had no paint, and looked to have been bricked up much later than the rest. I immediately pulled my phone and texted Dad, saying only "Need Cas." Then sat back and waited.

Less than a minute later Cas was down the stairs and weaving through the boxes.

"What is it?" He asked.

I pointed to the wall. "That, probably isn't anything but it looks like it's been sealed off, can you tell what's behind it?"

He stepped closer and laid his hand against the wall, leaning over until his ear was practically smashed against it.

"Uh, whatcha doing?"

"Making certain there wouldn't be anything inside that could be warded or booby trapped." He then took a step back. "I don't sense anything, give me a moment."

He then zapped away, was gone for less than two seconds and zapped back.

"It's a room," He stated, then shook his head. "But it's empty now."

"Figures," I huffed. "So no signs at all that it coulda been used as something big back in the day?"

"Unfortunately not, it's just a room with empty shelves lining the walls."

Not that I had high expectations for this building anyways, but it would've been nice if someone tossed us a frickin bone for once.

"What about upstairs, did you guys find anything?"

"No, there's nothing that gives any information. I doubt the Men of Letters would have been foolish enough to leave anything behind."

True, seeing is that they went to the extremes to hide everything by building these bunkers in Bermuda Triangle like areas. Everything that went down here in the fifties was one giant cover up, but I guess that's what needed to be done to protect such valuable information. So since we weren't getting jack squat from this building, we left and started for the cemetery Sam mentioned. Chances are we'd find jack squat there too but what else were we supposed to do? We needed to find the key to the Michael sword box, and we wouldn't get it lazing around the bunker.

It kind of surprised me that Dad or Sam hadn't found this stuff in the bunker in my time, but I guess since they weren't looking for the Michael sword in the future, they wouldn't have had a need. Actually, there really wasn't a way of knowing if they'd found it or not, they very well could have and just didn't mention it to me. Lucifer was back in his cage by that time, Michael was locked in there with him, so it wouldn't have been important.

Sam led the way this time through the cemetery and to four graves towards the back. He stopped just in front of them, since they had all been buried side by side.

"Well," He sighed. "Here they are. Not sure what we're gonna find here."

Cas moved passed us and knelt down at a particular headstone. "Why would this symbol engraved here be different than the other three?"

He brushed away the dirt and stuck on vines and sure enough, it wasn't the same Aquarian Star symbol as on the graves beside it.

"Any takers on what that symbol is?" Dad asked.

Sam leaned over and eyed it carefully. "Wait a second, I've seen that before."

He then jumped up and jogged back to where we parked the Impala and started rifling through the trunk before pulling out a book. He flicked through the pages as he jogged back over to us then nodded.

"Yeah," He said, thumping his finger down on a page. "It's the Haitian symbol for talking to the dead. Why would that symbol be on this grave but not the others?"

"Albert Magnus." Cas said, reading the name from the tombstone. "I don't recall reading that name in the news article."

"That's because it wasn't listed. All of the other names were there, but..." Sam closed the book and pulled the news article from his pocket. "According to this, this grave should belong to Larry Ganem, since he was killed with the others. So... Where the hell is he?"

"Maybe he wasn't buried here after all?" I replied. "Maybe the paper was wrong?"

"Or," Dad said, also going to the Impala and pulled shovels from the trunk. "Maybe that symbol was a message of some kind. A symbol for talking to the dead, on a Man of letters tomb stone? You know how they were, all secretive and cryptic, maybe that's a sign we need to see who's buried here?"

Sam shrugged then flung off his jacket. "Maybe, couldn't hurt to look. At the very least there might be something buried with the guy."

Dad tossed a shovel into Cas' stomach and he caught it with a grunt.

"Get to diggin, chuckles- Mary's still not healed yet so make yourself useful."

Cas didn't argue and took off his coat and suit jacket and before long all three of them were digging up the grave while I sat on the sidelines. It was starting to get dark when Sam's shovel thumped against something solid in the dirt. After Dad and Cas climbed out Sam started shoving dirt aside before ramming his shovel into the coffin and pried the lid free. Once he yanked it off Dad flicked on a flash light and shined it down on the body.

"Huh," Dad said, arching his brows. "So was Larry Ganem a World War 1 vet?"

Sam didn't respond and instead sifted through the tattered uniform until pulling out the soldiers dog tags.

"Uh, according to this, this isn't Larry Ganem, it's Captain Thomas J. Carry III." Sam said.

"What the..." I moved closer. "Okay, so we got the name Albert Magnus on the tombstone, and some soldier named Thomas in the hole? What the frick is goin on?"

"Good question," Sam sighed, leaning over and resting his arms on the edge of the grave. "Maybe this means Larry Ganem didn't die in whatever happened in that building."

I looked to Dad and Cas who stood side by side completely silent. Going by Dad's expression right then I could tell he was coming up with some kind of possible explanation.

"Maybe," He said after throwing his shovel down. "Maybe all of this was a way to show someone that he _was _actually alive, like you said. Fake name on the tombstone, wrong stiff in the box- Wouldn't be the first time someone faked their death and took on the identity of someone who croaked decades before."

Sam nodded. "Might be right, so I guess we should look into Captain Thomas, huh?"

"Yeah," Dad grabbed his shovel again. "After we cover him back up."

It was much faster and easier throwing dirt back over a grave, so within another thirty minutes we were back in the road and heading back into town. Dad found the nearest diner and before long we were sitting in a booth stuffing our faces while Sam researched on his laptop.

"So, if we can't find a way to get the box open, what're we gonna do?" I asked, popping a french fry in my mouth.

Dad didn't like that question, and really I didn't like asking it but it was kinda important.

"Don't know." He answered. "You said the only other way of stopping Lucifer was by the horsemen's rings and opening the cage door or whatever. But that ain't an option."

"Unless we could find another way of forcing him back in the cage." Cas suggested.

"But could we actually do that, really?" I replied.

"No, chances are we'd be dead before we even tried," Cas sighed. "But if we're going to avoid Sam saying yes, then we'll have to think of something."

Sam suddenly sat up, his face frozen in almost awe. "Guys, we might not have to do that. I found him. Captain Thomas J. Carry III is really giving a name to centurions, he's alive-" He gave half a crooked smile. "And guess where he's living?" We only gaped at him and he finally said. "Lebanon Kansas."

Dad was taken aback, his brows arched in surprise. "Uh, what? That's where the bunker is."

"Exactly," Sam nodded. "Which means, he's got to be Larry Ganem. It would make sense, right? If he's a Man of letters, the last surviving one, then of course he's gonna be living close to the bunker. Who knows, he's probably been keeping an eye out on it through the years, making sure no one found it."

After pushing his plate away Dad nodded. "We're gonna have to be careful with talking to the guy. He's been living under an assumed name for over fifty years, there's gotta be a reason for that. If we're gonna get any info out of him, we'll have to come up with some way to make him talk without spooking him."

I was about ready to bounce out of my seat by now, and wanted to get back on the road. "Just tell him you and Sammy are "Legacies", that your Grandpa was Henry Winchester- That might be all it takes to get him to talk."

Sam closed his laptop and was just getting started on his salad when his phone rang. After pulling it from his jacket he answered.

"Hey Bobby," He said, and Dad instantly gave him his complete attention. "Yeah, we're in Illinois right now, what's up?" After listening for a moment his face went blank. "Uh, what? Why would he come to you?" Dad was already waving the waitress over to pay the bill by now. "Okay, we're on our way, see you then."

And he hung up and shoved his phone back in his pocket and jumped up from the booth.

"What's going on now?" Dad asked.

"We gotta go, _now_. Bobby said someone paid him a visit, because he was looking for us." He stopped and zipped up his jacket. "Crowley."


	29. Chapter 29

The drive to Bobby's felt like it took forever. Everyone was anxious and ready to fly out of their seats when we finally pulled into his drive. Dad hadn't even cut the engine before Sam jumped out and started for the steps, and we quickly followed behind him. Bobby met us outside and skipped the usual hugs I noticed he gave to his boys, and instead motioned for us to come in.

I hadn't stepped in two seconds when I noticed he had demon warding symbols painted on every window, along with salt lines there and along the doors.

"Okay take a seat and let's get this over with." Bobby said, moving to his desk and flopping down.

"You said Crowley came here?" Dad asked, sitting on the sofa. "Why the hell would he come here?"

"Cause he was trying to get to you, you idgets. Said he wants to make some kinda deal," Bobby shrugged. "Hell if I know what he meant by that, don't bother askin."

"A deal?" Sam snickered. "Why? We haven't even met Crowley in this time yet. Why would he ever wanna make a deal with us?"

"Like I said, don't bother askin me what he meant by that, cause I ain't got the foggiest." Bobby leaned his elbows on the table. "Anywho- He said he wants to meet up with you, tomorrow morning- In town at the diner. Nice and public so no one can try stabbin or smiting him."

Cas actually huffed out a quiet laugh. "If he actually believes we intend to meet with him, then he's drastically mistaken."

"It _would _be stupid," Dad agreed. "But if we don't, what're the chances he leaves us alone after this?"

"None," I answered. "Crowley's really persistent and he always gets what he wants. If we don't meet up with him tomorrow then he's gonna end up doing something really really stupid to get our attention again."

"Like?" Sam asked.

"Uh, well Crowley in this year was never known for being a nice guy. So, probably something dangerous or deadly." I flopped down on the sofa beside Dad. "He knows we have Cas with us though, and since he wants to meet in a public place tomorrow, at least we know he wouldn't try something this time."

Cas leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. "But that also means we wouldn't be able to use force against him if the time called for it."

Bobby waited until we fell silent before he cleared his throat. "He, uh... He also had a request for tomorrow. He wants Mary to be there. No if's and's or but's."

"What?" Dad and Cas said in unison.

"Why?" Sam asked. "Why her specifically?"

I sighed and sat back, crossing one leg over the other. "Because I know things. He probably wants to confirm everything his future self told him, either that or he wants to pick my brain and see what I might know that his future self didn't."

Cas pushed away from the wall. "So it could be a trap then? It wouldn't be wise for Mary to go tomorrow if that's the case."

I figured Dad would've said something about Cas jumping in and making that decision, but it seemed now that he had a partner in crime so to speak, on watching my butt.

"Yeah, you might be right," He said, which made me frown. "But how could he try something if we're in a public place and you were there?"

"Theoretically speaking he couldn't do anything. But, I don't know this demon, so there's no way of telling if he could have some sort of sneak attack planned." Cas answered. "And, considering that I'm now cut off from heaven and not at full power, he very well might be able to subdue me somehow. Basically, I don't believe it's worth the risk."

I rested my head on my hand and rolled my eyes. "But, you could also think that he would know you weren't gonna bring me tomorrow after he requested it, which would leave me here without any backup, so what would stop him from comin after me here?"

Everyone gaped at me after that and Dad was the first to curse under his breath. "Awesome, so he's pretty much got his way no matter what, huh?" He then shook his head. "Nope, it's not gonna happen that way. If this asshole wants to meet with us then it's gonna be on our terms, not his. So, here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna summon him here, get him stuck in a devils trap, and then we'll find out what the hell he wants. Any objections?"

I for one didn't object, and neither did anyone else apparently. It was better than going to Crowley. Getting him stuck here at least ensured that he wasn't gonna try anything shady, and he'd be pretty much helpless even if he had that notion in his head at all. So, after gathering what we needed for summoning him, we headed to the basement where Bobby kept a devils trap painted on the ceiling. It was easier to keep Crowley held captive in the basement, rather than the devils trap upstairs.

They got everything set up and now all I could do was wait. Dad started mixing the ingredients for summoning him into a bowl, and waited for us to object- Which no one did, before he dropped the lit match into it. A poof of flames and smoke shot up and Dad quickly stepped back.

A few seconds later there Crowley was, stuck in the devils trap and not looking at all surprised to find himself there. Since this was the first he was seeing us in this time, he took a good look at everyone before giving a crooked smile.

"Well, are introductions in order?" He asked, slipping his hands into his pockets.

"Probably not," Dad replied. "You seem to know all about us already, right?"

"I've been made aware, yes-" He moved as close to the edge of the trap as he could. "The enormous giraffe is Sam, which means you're Dean." He looked to me. "And, lovely little Mary. I've heard a lot about you, darling." When he glanced at Cas the smile faded. "I don't fancy much your angel however."

"You hurt my feelings," Cas replied sarcastically, which was a surprise. "Although I have to say the feeling is mutual."

Crowley huffed out a deep sigh, but continued to smile. "I can tell already that this isn't going to be a pleasant meeting."

"So maybe you should just get to whatever you wanted, and then it can be over?" Sam suggested.

Crowley nodded. "Well, I've got a proposition for you. One that I'm certain you'll be interested in."

He went silent and I only rolled my eyes. He expected us to be all over what this proposition was, but once he noticed we weren't biting he sighed.

"You want the devil dead, I want the devil dead- We work together it's synergism, right?" He went on.

Still he only stared at us when we didn't have much of a response, Dad cleared his throat and shook his head. "Except, the problem with that is there isn't a way to kill Lucifer, so you're wasting your breath, ass-hat."

Crowley's face fell flat. "Not a way? I think you're forgetting who you're dealing with here. There's always a way, if you have the will that is." He reached into his jacket and pulled out a colt, and duh I already knew it was _the _colt. "You're forgetting about this, aren't you?"

Dad passed a glance to Sam, Cas and me. Yeah we already knew that the colt wouldn't work, but apparently Crowley didn't. But that didn't change the fact that Dad wanted it back.

"Haven't seen that in a while," Dad said, trying to act slightly surprised. "How'd you get hold of that?"

"That's not important, you want it back, right?" Crowley waved it in the air. "I give it to you, you empty the barrel in Lucifer's face, we all go on our merry ways afterwards. Sound like a good plan to you?"

"Why're you so willing to hand it over to us?" Sam asked, also playing along. "And how do we know it's the actual colt? For all we know it could be a fake, and we'd go out there and try to kill the devil and end up getting our asses nuked."

Crowley sighed, the colt falling limply to his side. "You're so distrusting, it's not very attractive. Really, it's the colt. Believe me I want Lucifer done away with because the first thing he does after destroying all of humanity, is coming after us demons. I swear, it's the actual monster killing colt. Do you want it or not?" We didn't speak and he moved his eyes from each of us. "In case I'm wrong, you don't have any other plans for killing Lucifer, please correct me if I've misunderstood? So why wouldn't you take the bloody thing and use it on him?"

Dad cleared his throat and stepped forward. "We'd be doin you a favor if we actually did this. So, what're we gonna get in the end?"

"What, the devil dead isn't enough?" Crowley shook his head. "Let's just say I would be in your debt, and believe me that's not such a bad thing. If it all plays out the way I hope I'll let you ask _me _one favor, anything in the world. Sound like a good deal?"

Actually yeah in a way it kind of did. Having someone as powerful as Crowley owing us a favor could come in handy in the future if we were stuck.

Since we were pretty much tricking Crowley into handing over the colt, Dad motioned over his shoulder and we all huddled in the corner.

"So what you think?" He asked.

Since Bobby hadn't been told yet that the colt was useless against Lucifer, he gave a halfhearted shrug. "Can't say that I like the idea of doin that jackass any favors, but... He does have a good point. We don't have any other plans for takin Lucifer down."

"Yeah, about that," Dad cleared his throat. "We'll talk about that later, so... We tell him it's a deal or what?"

"Under the circumstances I don't think we have much of a choice." Cas whispered. "If we didn't, it would only lead him to question why exactly we turned down what could possibly be the only weapon in creation that could kill Lucifer."

"Tick tock, ladies," Crowley said from his place in the basement. "I'm a busy man and can't be here all day."

Dad rolled his eyes and finally stomped back over to Crowley and held his hand out. "Okay, it's a deal. Hand it over."

Well Crowley looked damned pleased with himself, and he cautiously reached out and dropped the colt into Dad's hand, then after pulling a small case of ammunition from his pocket- Dropped that in his hand too.

"Pleasure doing business with you-" He said, smiling. "Now, do you think you could..." He motioned to the ceiling where the devils trap was painted.

"Wait," I said holding up my hand. "What was all this crap you said about wanting me to be present for this meeting or whatever? Was it a load of shit?"

"In a way," Crowley answered. "I just wanted to get a good look at you, and- I knew that if I sent out that personal request then chances are your Father would insist on meeting me here, where it's much safer than-" He pointed to a basement window. "Out there. Lucifer's out there you know, and he has ears everywhere."

Well, I was right. Crowley was persistent and he always got what he wanted.

"So, can I go now?" Crowley asked.

Judging by Dad's stance I could tell he would've rather just killed the guy- But, I think he knew just as much as I did that having Crowley owing us one was worth it in the long run. There's no telling what kind of crap we'd be in later with no way out. We very well might have to end up turning to him for help. So, he grabbed a step ladder and scratched a line through the devils trap and Crowley sauntered his way out.

"Thank you," He smiled. "Well, good luck. Let's hope Lucifer doesn't mangle you."

And poof, the douche bag was gone, and we were left standing with the colt, and no solid plan for killing Lucifer.

* * *

We explained everything to Bobby, filled him in on all the details that he didn't know- And then made plans to leave to head back to Lebanon to find the mystery man who we suspected was Larry Ganem. But, as it turns out Dad's car had other plans for us, and decided to stall halfway out of Bobby's driveway. So, that meant we were camping out at Bobby's at least over night so he could make repairs.

While Dad was fixing his car I offered to help, but since it was cold as hell outside- He pretty much ordered me back inside. It was after noticing a calender hanging on Bobby's fridge did I see what day it happened to be. Afterwards I felt my mouth go agape.

I couldn't believe I'd forgotten it- I never had before. It was one of the most important days and every year I looked forward to it. We never had many special occasions, never really celebrated holidays or anything like that. But this, this was the day we would take time off, sit down and relax and just be ourselves.

It was Dad's birthday.

Going by how Dad was so involved with his baby I didn't think he even remembered it. Sam didn't either, he was busy with his nose stuck in a book with Bobby. Cas, well- He was oblivious to things like that so I doubted he'd make mention of it. So that meant it was up to me.

When I was a kid it's not like we ever had parties or things like that for birthdays. It was mainly just the four of us camped around the table stuffing our faces and picking on each other. But, like I said- It was the one day where we seemed to forget everything and just relax. Dad had kinda started that when I was little with my own birthday, and once I was old enough, I started it with Dad and Sammy's. Our lives were never "normal" so it was nice to have something every once in a while that kinda felt like it.

So, I found Cas lingering in the kitchen casually glancing over Sam's shoulder at the book he was reading before I grabbed him by the coat sleeve and dragged him into the nearest hallway.

"I need you to zap me into town." I whispered. "Please."

"What, why? Is something wrong?" He replied.

"Nope, everything's cool but there's some stuff I need to pick up and I don't want Dad to know about it, so... Will you?"

"Mary, I don't think it's wise to keep something from Dean, you know how he gets."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Cas, it's nothing bad." I motioned for him to keep quiet and he nodded. "It's his birthday today, so..."

I figured that would be explanation enough but I guess I forgot who I was talking to- Because Cas only stared at me with squinted eyes.

"And?" He replied.

"Ugh," I smacked myself on the forehead. "Just zap me into town, okay? Gimme a second."

I moved past him and stepped back into the kitchen, and Sam hadn't budged an inch.

"I'm gonna go on a beer and food run, okay?" I said and Sam just barely murmured something in response.

Okay so that was done- At least no one would freak out once they noticed me missing. After grabbing my jacket I met Cas in the hallway and he zapped me to the nearest convenience mart.

Shopping with past Cas was interesting to say the least. It was kinda like shopping with a three year old who wanted to throw everything in the cart. But I was only getting two particular items, pie and Dad's favorite beer.

"I never understood the concept of celebrating birthdays," Cas said as I walked down the aisle. "In my opinion it would be upsetting. As more years go by, the more you begin to realize that you're going to be having less and less birthdays- Eventually leading right up to your death."

I stopped and snorted out a laugh. "Cas, you're always so upbeat and chipper aren't you? I guess you'd have to be human to understand. And, not immortal and older than dirt."

He squinted at me. "You're being facetious, aren't you?"

"Sorta. At least about the upbeat and chipper part."

"Then explain it to me, please?"

There was a line at the register so I had a couple minutes.

"Okay, it's about being happy that someone you care about is alive, and you show that by..." Yeah this wasn't so easy to explain.

"By giving them pie and beer?" He finished for me.

"When it comes to Dad... Yeah, pretty much- But it's mainly just the thought that counts. Knowing that someone remembered and actually gives a damn."

He gave an insignificant "Hm" as response and I don't think it really registered with him. Even in the future he didn't quite understand it, but he appreciated the symbolism. Guess it was gonna take a while for him to get to that point now.

After I was finished I had him zap me back to the house, and I made sure Dad was still alone outside fixing the Impala before I grabbed everything and headed out there. He was buried under the hood so he didn't see or hear me coming until I cleared my throat.

"Wanna take a break?" I asked, then headed for the picnic table under the awning.

"Can't really take a break, kid-" He said, not bothering to come out from under the hood. "Wanna get this done so we can hit the road. Larry Ganem ain't getting any younger."

"You sure?" I went on, laying everything down and cracking open a beer. "I got pie."

He peaked out just long enough to notice everything on the table, then chuckled. "What's this all about?"

"It's your birthday," I answered, shrugging. "So, birthday pie and beer."

After standing up straight he pulled his phone from his pocket and checked the date. "Son of a bitch... It _is_ my birthday."

He grabbed a dirty rag and wiped his hands off before sitting down at the table. "So is this somethin we did in the future, huh? Celebrate birthdays over pie and beer?"

"Yep," I smiled. "Well, the pie anyways- You'd quit drinking when I was just a baby." His hand faltered with the bottle of beer hovering inches away from his lips, then without taking a drink he sat it back on the table. "It's okay," I snickered. "I don't expect for you to quit now, Dad."

He nodded but still didn't look very interested in drinking it. After a few long seconds he reached into the case and pulled out a second bottle and handed it to me.

"Just this one time." He said, winking.

I quickly grabbed it before he could change his mind, twisted off the cap and threw it on the ground. I managed a few sips before the pie was beckoning to me. We both ate in silence for a few minutes before Dad cleared his throat.

"So, I was doing some thinking-" He said. "Got an idea I wanna run by you."

I nearly choked on my beer. "Run by _me_?"

"Yeah," He finally took a gulp of beer. "It's kind of a _what if_ plan."

"Okay, lay it on me."

He rested his elbows on the table and took another bite. "Okay, so I was thinking about our whole situation with Lilith before she got ganked. Cas was sayin how we might've been able to kill her with an angel blade, but actually getting close enough to use it on her was impossible, right?" I nodded. "Well, if we get the key to the box, and actually get the Michael sword- What makes us think we're any more able to get close enough to use it on Lucifer then we would Lilith? Actually, it'd be even more impossible gettin close enough to the damn devil."

Jeez, I'd never even thought of that. Kind of stupid that we didn't though. I guess we figured that if we had the Michael sword then everything would be fucking dandy and we could ice the devil and go on our merry ways.

"Yeah, you have a point I guess, so- What's your what if plan?" I replied.

"It might sound a little crazy-" He snickered and shook his head. "No, it sounds a lot crazy, but... Remember when you got shot?"

"Uh, yeah- Kinda hard to forget, Dad."

"Well, Gerry shot Cas, remember? Said he melted down an angel blade and fashioned bullets out of it. So I was thinking, what if we did that with the Michael sword? Not only would we have an advantage using an actual gun, but Lucifer wouldn't expect it, and he wouldn't be worried about getting shot. He'd have no friggin clue we found that damn sword, right?" He took another bite. "And we wouldn't have to worry about trying to get close enough to shiv the asshole."

I nodded, and suddenly lost interest in my beer and pie. "Yeah, that might work."

"Risky though," He went on. "Like for instance, if we miss- Or don't have many bullets. Then we'd be without a weapon or a plan."

My eyes wandered to the massive graveyard of junked out cars. "Yeah it's definitely risky, but... You're right when you say we'd have no chance of gettin close enough to Lucifer to actually use a sword on him. Lilith was a powerful demon, sure- But this is the frickin devil. And one sword between the four of us isn't enough."

After scraping his plate clean he sat back and sighed. "I'm just trying to think of any other way other than Sammy saying yes to the dick. I don't want it to come to that."

"Me either. Not only did it fuck Sam over later, but it was almost impossible for him to take control over his own mind once Lucifer was in him. He might not be able to do it this time."

A few minutes of silence went by, and all I could do was stare down at my plate and the piece of pie I'd barely touched.

"Dammit," Dad muttered, sitting back with a sigh. "You came out here to do something nice for my birthday and I screwed it up, didn't I? I coulda waited til later to talk to you about this shit."

I shook it off and gave half a smile. "Nah, it's cool. Considering the situation we're all in it's kinda understandable."

"Still," He sighed. "Was kind of a dick move on my part. Sorry kid." By now he was nervously tapping his fork on his plate. "You know, you and Sammy... You're the only two people that I'd never wanna disappoint, so... If I'm ever being a dick, you can tell me."

"Dad," For some reason I couldn't look at him. "You're the one person that would never disappoint me, so... You don't gotta worry about that."

It was starting to get dark, and I knew he'd wanna get back to work on the Impala, so I stood and started to clean off the table.

I wasn't upset with him for bringing up that subject now when I was trying to "celebrate" his birthday, it was... Honestly, it was just the entire situation suddenly came and slammed down on me. Yeah, it was always in my mind, my responsibility of coming back here and changing things- But it's easy to get side tracked when you're with your family and off trying to figure out a way to save the world.

Dad looked as though he wanted to say something, but didn't- And instead buried himself back under the hood.

"I think I'm gonna turn in early," I said. "It's getting late and we're probably gonna head out at first light, right?"

"Yeah," He answered. "Should be up and running by then." I nodded and started back towards the house but he stopped me. "Hang on a second, Mary." He climbed out from under the hood long enough to jog over and give me a hug. "Thanks for this. It's been a hell of a long time since someone's actually given a crap about my birthday. By the way, when's yours?"

"March," I answered. "March fifth."

"I'll keep that in mind." He let go and went back to the car and I left him to that.

Ugh, why did I have to feel like crap now? It wasn't the time to get all mopey over everything, especially when we all needed to be on top of our games for whatever was gonna happen next.

When I stepped back in the house I was in the kitchen long enough to drop off the dirty dishes then start for the stairs.

"Mary, we're gonna get take out- You hungry?" Sam asked just before I left the room.

"Uh," I stopped and tried to give a fake smile. "No, I'm... Kinda tired so..."

Seeing is that his forehead crinkled I knew he didn't believe me and could sense something was wrong- But I guess he knew better then to try and get me to talk. Sometimes it can be kinda obvious when a chick wants to be alone.

I didn't get that though because no sooner had I stepped into the extra room Bobby was letting me use, was there a knock on the door.

For a second I actually considered just ignoring whoever was on the other side of it, but that kinda shit didn't fly with my family because it would only lead them to bust the door down. So, I opened it a crack and peaked out noticing it was Cas.

"Hey," I said, giving yet another fake smile. "What's up?"

He eyed me for a second before clearing his throat. "May I come in?"

I opened the door fully to let him in, then flopped on the edge of the bed and kicked off my boots.

"Is everything alright?" He asked.

And I sighed deeply, shaking my head as I unlaced my boots- Because somehow, even though the angel was as clueless as clueless came, he somehow always knew when there was something bothering me. Which sometimes was an inconvenience cause sometimes a chick just needs alone time to mope and be sad without anyone noticing.

"I dunno-" I answered, despite my hesitance. "I guess so."

"And you claimed I was a bad liar," He sighed. "What is it?"

I threw my boots down in disgust and huffed out a breath of air. "It's everything I guess. Ya know, it's easy to forget why I came back here- I get caught up in everything that's happening and then suddenly, out of no where, it's like I'm hit by a fucking bus. The fact that I'm the only one that knows all this shit and there's things that I _don't _know. Even now that I have Crowley's memories I'm sure there's details that I don't have. Important details, things that could mean life or death in the end."

He nodded and sat down beside me. "You had to have known though before you came back to this year that it was bound to be overwhelming."

"Yeah, I know- But... You don't get it I guess. Trust me, I wanna be here, I wanna help... It's just sometimes I just wanna feel like I used to. For five minutes, I don't wanna think about anything."

"You've placed too much responsibility on yourself, Mary-" He replied. "It's a weight you can't carry and if you continue on that way it'll eventually wear you down until you break."

Little did he know but that had already happened. Constantly worrying that if I fucked up just once then everything could end up worse then it already had, not getting enough sleep because I was up all night trying to come up with different solutions to our problems. Then feeling like a pile of shit when I couldn't come up with anything. My family meant _everything _to me, enough that I was willing to die a million times over if it meant saving them- Enough that I was perfectly willing to sell my soul for my Dad and Sammy and not think twice about it.

Some people might've thought it was strange for a daughter to love her Dad so much, or to depend on her Dad that much. But I couldn't help it, I held him on a pedestal and I wasn't ashamed to admit it. Which I guess only made it that much harder on me when I couldn't come up with anything useful for our problems.

"I'm here," He interrupted my thoughts, latching onto my hand. "If you need... Support or... Just someone to listen."

"Thanks, Cas. That means a lot."

He said nothing and instead only stared at me. To me it seemed like he had something else on his mind, but... He wouldn't speak. He just... _Stared_. Those damn eyes stuck on mine like friggin glue.

"I, uh..." He cleared his throat and stood. "I'll let you rest now."

He stood and started for the door and I followed, opening it for him. But now it seemed he couldn't move his feet because he lingered in the doorway for several long seconds.

I was about to question him about his weird behavior when he suddenly stepped back inside, slammed the door closed and pushed me against it.

What happened next was definitely not misinterpreted. He kissed me, and it wasn't like the innocent little kisses we'd had before. This was intense, and not at all gentle and damn if it wasn't incredible. He was pressed up against me so tightly I could barely breathe, and his fingers were tangled in my hair. I don't know what caused him to do that, it certainly wasn't like him- At least not in this year, but I definitely wasn't going to object.

He only pulled away long enough to say, "I should go."

And I gave an insignificant. "Mhm." Before he started kissing me again and I reached behind me and locked the door.

This was really not the right place or right time for this to happen, considering everyone was downstairs- But right at that moment I don't think either of us even thought of that. Still, I had no idea why Cas decided now of all times to suddenly decide he wasn't scared of me anymore, but... Yeah- I wasn't gonna complain.


	30. Chapter 30

**_Thanks again for all the nice reviews, you're all awesome :)_**

* * *

I'm sure there was an expectation for raunchy details, for me to go into e_xplicate _detail about what happened. Well... Tough shit, you want something like that go rent a porno cause that's not really something I do. I might've been Dean Winchesters daughter, but that doesn't mean I was like him with _everything_. He had no issues talking about things like that- Although once I got old enough to understand things he kinda toned it down some. But still, that's just not who I was.

All I can say is that it happened, yes _that_, and okay I'll admit it was really _really **really** _good. Surprising enough, considering this past Cas had never had sex before. The only issue was since we were in a house with my Dad, Uncle and Bobby- It was kinda hard not to give it away what we were actually doing up there- Being quiet wasn't something I was very capable of doing, but I managed.

But after it happened the first time I could only lay there trying not to giggle at how Cas was staring at the ceiling in complete and total surprise. I'd been counting the minutes that he hadn't blinked, and I think we were past the two minute mark.

"That was..." He swallowed, finally able to form words. "_Incredible_."

"Yeah," I chuckled. "It was, wasn't it?"

Finally he blinked, as he shifted his eyes over to me. "Why didn't we do that sooner?"

"Hm," I sighed, snuggling against the pillow. "Probably because I haven't been here that long, and... You were scared of me."

"Oh-" He looked away quickly. "Well, if it's any consolation I'm not afraid of you anymore."

"Good to know," I smiled. "So, I gotta ask... What made you decide to actually do this?"

He let out a few deep breaths while absently picking at the blanket. "I don't know. I can't explain it, Mary."

"Explain what exactly?"

He swallowed again. "What I'm feeling. I've never experienced it before. It's completely different, and not something that I can compare to anything else. All I know is that it's pleasant." He rolled over to face me. "Is this what happiness feels like?"

For a minute I only laid there staring at him, the flush in his cheeks hadn't faded yet and he looked incredibly peaceful.

"I couldn't answer that, Cas-" I said. "It feels different for everyone I think."

He nodded and moved closer, draping his arm over me. "At least I understand now."

"Understand what?"

"Why people place such importance on an act that's completely necessary for procreation. I've observed humanity since the beginning, and I often wondered why something so simple could be considered that powerful." He smiled faintly. "I understand now."

I gave a crooked smile of my own. "Oh, well- Since you understand, you gotta know that it's kind of a rule that you can't just do it once, right? Actually, it's kinda looked down upon if you only do it once."

He squinted at me. "Now I know you're joking this time."

"Am I?"

His eyes fell to my lips and stayed there. "Even if you are joking... I don't think that matters."

And he kissed me, and before I knew it it was happening all over again. All I can say is that he had a way of taking a girls mind off of things. By the time morning came around and I started to jolt out of the best sleep I'd had since coming back to this year, his steady breathing was the only thing I could hear.

I didn't open my eyes right off, because it had been a while since I'd been this relaxed and wanted to relish it as long as possible- Because before long, I'd be thrust back into turmoil all over again, back to the scary reality that was our lives. I was forced out of it though when someone pounded on the door.

"Mary," Dad called out. "You getting up anytime soon or what?"

My eyes shot open and locked onto Cas', he was barely three inches from me and still had his arm over me.

"Mary?" Dad said again. "You awake?"

"Uh, yeah-" I yelled back. "Be up in a minute."

"You seen Cas yet this morning?"

Cas was going to speak but I quickly shoved my hand over his mouth.

"No, not yet-" I answered. "I'll be down in a minute, gotta take a shower."

"Okay well hurry it up- We gotta take off soon."

I waited until I heard his steps down the stairs before I moved my hand from his mouth.

"Morning," I said flashing him a smile. "I'm surprised you're still here."

"Why wouldn't I be?" He replied.

"Well... You don't sleep, so... I figured laying there for hours with nothing to do would get boring."

"I'm accustomed to long passages of time," He sighed. "A few hours isn't long for someone like me. Besides, it's relaxing watching you sleep."

"Huh," I chuckled. "Well this is deja vu from the future."

"How so?"

"You used to say the same thing then too." I rolled over and glanced out the window, noticing past the curtains it was already light. "And, I wish I could just stay here like this for another few hours, but, we gotta get going apparently."

"Mary," He stopped me before I could climb out of bed. "Last night was very important to me- I just wanted you to know that."

I guess it was easy to forget in the heat of the moment that this wasn't the future, and Cas wasn't used to something like this. Up until last night he had been a gajillion year old virgin. In my year I knew that he'd been with someone in the past, but according to him it was just once and whoever she was had tried to kill him. That's as much as he told me and as much as I wanted to know.

"It was important to me too," I kissed his forehead. "You can be incredibly sweet when you wanna be, you know?"

"What happens now?" He replied, grabbing me and pulling me back to lay down.

"I dunno, what'd you want to happen?"

His eyes trailed away as he thought that one over. "I... Think I want this to happen again. And whatever else comes from it. All I know is that I was right with what I wrote in the note, and I understand completely why I warned myself to not ruin anything."

I reached over and slid my fingers through his hair, noticing how just that one small action made his eyes flit closed. Of course I knew already that was one of the little things that really affected him. I guess I was at a slight advantage with this, seeing is that I knew everything about him from the future.

"If that's what you really want then I don't have any objections." I said and after a quick kiss I unfortunately had to get up. "Okay, so... It might be a good idea if you didn't say anything about what we did ya know... Dad might-"

"Kill me? Yes I know." He interrupted.

"Actually, I was thinking he'd probably kick your balls up to your throat, but-" I shrugged. "Yeah, for now he shouldn't know about anything."

"I understand."

I threw a shirt on and searched through my bag for some clean clothes. "Don't think that it's cause I'm ashamed or anything, because that's definitely _not _it, okay?"

"That thought never even crossed my mind."

"Cause you know, I know how my Dad is. And how he reacted the first time this happened."

He paused after buttoning up his pants. "What did he do?"

"Uh..." I snickered. "Well he caught you and me in the kitchen, kissing. And, uh... Well he sorta threw you up against the wall and tried to strangle you."

He didn't seem to be very concerned about that. "Well that's pointless, he can't kill me by trying to strangle me, it's impossible."

I stopped and gaped at him. "Not really the point, Cas. The point is, is that it pissed him off so much that he tried to kill you. Doesn't matter if it didn't work, the point is is that he _tried _at all. So, we gotta be careful."

After slipping on his shirt he paused before buttoning it. "So, how was the issue resolved?"

"Um, we talked it out. You explained to him that you weren't just fucking around and that you were serious. It actually went pretty good after he stopped trying to throttle you." I started for the door now. "Okay, I really need to take a shower, wait a few minutes after I'm outa here to pop up downstairs, don't wanna rouse suspicion, right?"

Yeah I know I was rushing and it made me look bad- But it really was because I was afraid Dad would try to kill the guy. It wasn't just that Dad tried to strangle Cas in the future, he actually threw him out of the damn bunker for a couple weeks he was so pissed. He saw it as betrayal, that his best friend was messing around with his daughter behind his back and didn't have the decency to talk to him about it first. And we hadn't even done anything other than kiss.

I wasn't sure how past Dad would react if he found out- Who knows, since he was younger and hadn't known me that long maybe he wouldn't have flipped out. But I wasn't willing to take that chance.

Cas was looking like a kicked puppy as I unlocked the door, so I turned back and kissed him again. The last thing I wanted was for him to think I was ashamed or regretted what happened.

But, the one thing I hoped he would understand was while yeah I did care about him, and wanted to be with him- I wasn't going to let it interfere with the real reason why I came back here. I wasn't gonna be like those girls you see in movies or on tv that completely let a guy take over everything they are- To the point that they can't even function when they're not around. In my opinion you could love someone, but not let them destroy everything that makes you _you_. Cas understood that in the future so, I don't think there would be any reason why he wouldn't have that same mindset in the past.

After I pulled away I tapped his cheek and he gave a faint smile. "I'll be downstairs in a few minutes."

He nodded and finished getting dressed while I sneaked my way to the bathroom and hopped in the shower. When I was finally finished and made my way to the kitchen, I peaked warily around the doorway to make sure everything seemed normal.

And it did. Dad and Sam were sitting at the table stuffing their faces and Bobby was pouring himself a cup of coffee. Cas was aimlessly staring out the window and it was a little hard to not notice how he was keeping himself as far from my Dad as physically possible. When I stepped into the kitchen Dad glanced up long enough to nod me over.

"Breakfast, you hungry?" He asked.

"God I'm starving," I answered, flopping down at the table and piling my plate high of bacon and eggs.

Cas awkwardly fidgeted behind us for a couple minutes before sitting down beside me. He failed at trying to act normal.

"So Cas-" Dad said with his mouth full. "What were you off doin all night?"

And he froze with his eyes wide and mouth agape and I stared at him chewing my bite a million times over thinking to myself- Well he definitely wasn't doin your daughter all night.

"I, uh..." He garbled. "Was right here Dean, what are you talking about?"

Dad sat up with his cheek bulging. "Uh, no you weren't? I was awake til 2 and you weren't here. Seriously, where the hell were you?" Now he looked to me. "Mary? Do you know?"

"Yeah," I answered nonchalantly taking another bite. "We were having sex all night."

And just as it was when I announced I'd kissed him that morning in the motel room, neither of them took it seriously, and poor Cas looked like he was gonna pee his pants.

"Right," Sam snorted. "Good one."

"I know you're just being a smart ass-" Dad sighed. "But come on, have a little consideration for your old man here. I don't need that mental image."

It's easier to hide the truth if you made it come out as a joke, thank god. If both Cas and me sat there looking guilty it wouldn't take Dad two seconds to realize something happened, and then Cas would probably be blessed with Dad's fork in his spleen.

"So what time are we leaving?" I asked, changing the subject.

"As soon as we're done here," Dad replied. "We lost a lot of time with my baby up on blocks."

"I don't think one day is gonna make much of a difference, Dean-" Sam added. "But yeah, we really do need to go and talk to that guy. Things have been quiet out there since Lucifer broke out, and I'm sure I'm not the only one that thinks that isn't gonna last long. He must be planning something big, we're talking millions dead _big_."

I suddenly sat up straight and nearly spat out my food. "Shit... I just remembered."

"What?" Dad swallowed. "What now?"

"I can't believe I forgot to tell you about what happens with the horsemen. Okay so I'll just skip to the end. The Croatoan virus, remember that?" I didn't let them respond. "Pestilence is gonna figure out a way to get it started by putting it in swine flu vaccinations."

"What?" Bobby turned away from the stove. "Shit, I was just watching the news last night and they're talkin about the huge swine flu outbreak that's spreadin through the damn country."

"Holy crap," Dad said, pushing away from the table. "What the hell are we supposed to do about that?"

"We can't go after Lucifer and Pestilence at the same time-" Sam added. "What now?"

"Maybe this would be the one favor we could ask of Crowley-" Cas suggested. "I very much doubt he'd want humanity destroyed by that virus when he _needs _humanity for his deals."

Yeah he had a point, but would Crowley actually risk his ass to do that? I just didn't know.

"Maybe," Dad rubbed his head. "Dammit, it's just one friggin thing after another ain't it?"

"Least we could do is ask him," Sam nodded. "And... If he turns us down, then we'll just have to figure something else out."

"But what about the rest of the horsemen?" I said. "Cause yeah, Pestilence is a biggie but the others aren't anything to sneeze at either."

"Once Lucifer is dead the remaining horsemen should be taken down with him," Cas answered. "They're here only because he brought them here- If he's gone, then the bond breaks and they return to where they came from."

Well at least we didn't have to worry about that just yet. So far there hadn't been any signs of the horsemen, but Lucifer hadn't been out that long.

"So, before we take off I guess we summon Crowley again," Dad said with reluctance. "Might as well get it over with now."

He stomped out of the room and we all followed, and no one was looking forward to talking to Crowley again- Especially since we knew how it would go.

And, we were right for the most part, because after we summoned the asshole again, and explained the situation- He stood there with a glass of booze in one hand and a bottle in the other and only gaped at us with his mouth open.

"And," He finally spoke. "How pray tell do you expect for me to accomplish that? Pestilence... Are you mad?"

Dad wasn't standing down with this one, I could tell. "You said you'd owe us a favor, remember?"

"When Lucifer's dead you dolt! I just gave you the bloody colt yesterday, he's not dead yet so maybe I should ask why would I ever even _try _to go after Pestilence?"

And Dad pulled the colt from his jacket and aimed it straight at Crowley's face. "Because if you don't, you're dead. Simple enough."

Crowley's mouth cinched to practically invisible. "I underestimated you, clearly."

"So do we have a deal or what?" Dad barked back.

He threw back his shot of something in one quick gulp, then shook his head. "This isn't something that's easy to do."

"You have dozens of your demon buddies to help you out with it," Sam said. "So, you don't have to get your hands _too _dirty."

"True," Crowley sighed, pouring himself another shot. "So, I take down Pestilence, stop the distribution of the virus and in return you still go after Lucifer."

"Sounds like a good deal to me," Bobby said. "Big Daddy Satan is the one you gotta worry about after all."

"Yes or no," Dad snapped again. "Deal or no deal cause my arm's gettin tired and we don't have a whole hell of a lot of time here."

He was just toying with us now, because that's what the dick did. He liked to drag it out as long as possible which was surprising because I seriously believed Dad would shoot him in the face.

"Under the circumstances I don't seem to have much of a choice now do I?" He finally relented. "It's a deal, consider Pestilence gone."

"How can we believe you?" Cas asked. "How do we know that once we set you free from the devils trap that you won't change your mind?"

"A deal is a deal and I always honor them," Crowley spat back, eying Cas in disgust. "I'm a business man, I wouldn't get anywhere if I was constantly going back on my word. I might be a bastard but I'm an honest bastard."

I sighed and stepped forward. "As much as I hate to admit it, he's telling the truth. Crowley always makes good on his end of a deal."

"Thank you, darling-" He smirked. "Now if you'll let me out of here I can get to work, and so can you lot."

Of course I knew in the end Crowley was gonna bend us over somehow. After he stopped Pestilence he'd figure someway out of screwing us out of something, or manipulating, or blackmailing, yeah he'd do something because that's just the type of fuck wad he was back in this year. But, for the moment we couldn't think about that because the bigger issues at hand were Lucifer and the damn horseman. So Dad scratched a line through the devils trap and Crowley disappeared.

"Okay," Dad said heading for the door. "Time to go."

We grabbed our bags and started outside with Bobby following. He was gonna tag along behind us and give us a hand in case if we got the location to the hidden bunker in New York. After packing everything up we started down the drive but didn't make it before yet again the Impala stalled.

"What the fuck!" Dad shouted, slamming his hands on the steering wheel. "What the hell is going on now?!" He climbed out and popped the hood and we followed. "I don't get it, there's nothing wrong. Why the hell..."

"Dean-" Cas interrupted. "This is exactly what happened to Mary and I before..."

And of course that's what happened. Several flapping of wings later we were completely surrounded by dick bag angels. Cas' angel blade slid out of his coat sleeve but it didn't matter, because in a matter of seconds one of them appeared in front of him and with a slam against his chest he went soaring across the driveway. His blade flew at my feet, and I grabbed it, ducking just in time and sticking it in the angels chest. Not that it helped matters any, everyone was getting swarmed. Dad and Sam were taken down and surrounded, Bobby was pinned in his own damn car- And Cas was... Where ever the hell he was.

I was the only one left standing and I knew what this meant. They were fucking after me... Again!

But, they weren't trying to gank me, that's what I found strange. The last I heard Zachariah put a hit out on me, and if they wanted me dead then they sure as hell coulda got that done without blinking. All they'd have to do was snap their fingers and I would explode.

I think I mainly amused them by the way I was standing with Cas' angel blade at the ready. No one seemed threatened even though I'd just killed one of their buddies. But, it was five against one- So I didn't stand a chance.

"Drop the weapon," One man spoke. "And no one gets hurt."

"Mary don't!" Dad shouted, struggling against another man who had him pinned down.

"Alright, I tried asking nicely." With a nod three more angels jumped me, and practically snapped my arm right out of its socket before I dropped the blade and they zapped me away.

Jesus Christ, not again...

* * *

Once Mary was gone the remainder of the angels disappeared right along with her. Dean pulled himself back to his feet, jogging to Sam who was grunting with his face in the dirt as he lugged him back up.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'll live." Sam replied.

Cas limped his way over from a junk pile he'd been tossed into and immediately turned a circle.

"Cas," Dean said. "Please tell me you know what the fuck this is about? Where'd they take Mary?!"

Cas shook his head. "I don't know. I have no idea what this is about."

Dean started frantically pacing back and forth before skidding to a stop. "Okay, what the hell are we gonna do? How're we supposed to find her? They coulda taken her anywhere."

"Dean," Sam grabbed him by the shoulder and forced him to stop. "Look, I now you're gonna give me shit about this, but... We gotta get to Kansas and talk to Larry Ganem. We're running out of time to find that damn key. I think it'd be best if me and Bobby just kept on going, okay?"

"Oh sure, thanks a lot, Sammy-" Dean spat back. "It's not like my kid just got abducted by fucking angels or nothing!"

"I know, I'm a dick for saying it- But you know that if we don't find the key to that box, then we're not the only ones screwed, the entire world is."

Cas let out a long winded sigh. "As much as I hate to say it, Sam's right. Plus, if they wanted Mary dead then they simply would have killed her here instead of just taking her. So, at least we know that they want her alive for the moment."

Dean jerked out of his brothers grasp. "Fine, go. Me and Cas'll find her. Get outa here."

Sam hesitated joining Bobby in his car. "I'm sorry, Dean. But if we wait-"

"Go," Dean gave him a little shove. "I'll find her."

After a nod Sam jogged to Bobby's car and climbed in the passenger seat, then they peeled out of the drive. Dean watched them go with a bitter expression, and tried not to explode. Honestly he was more than pissed that Sam would've rather gone to Kansas then help him find Mary. But, Sam never did look at family quite the same as he did.

"What can we do, man?" Dean asked, watching Bobby's tail lights disappear in the distance.

He already knew the answer to that question, but he was hoping the angel would have some kind of solution to offer.

"I don't know," He said, his eyes lowered to the ground. "If Zachariah is responsible for this, which I guarantee he is, then he wouldn't take her to a location that would be easy to find. He'll have the place warded, which means I won't be able to sense him or anyone else- And since Mary's ribs are inscribed with sigils... I can't track her either."

"So," Dean swung around. "We just stand here with our thumbs up our asses?"

Cas himself was trying not to panic, knowing that if he did then Dean would crumble completely.

"I would advise we start driving, and hope somehow that Mary comes into contact with us."

Dean shook his head as he jumped back in the drivers seat. This time, the Impala had no issues with starting or leaving Bobby's property.

Before long they were flying down the road with no real destination in mind.

The car was unnervingly silent, and Dean's stomach was churning to the point he thought he would vomit. There was a question burning on the tip of his tongue, something that he'd wanted to ask Cas for a while now- But didn't, because he assumed it was only coincidence. Not now though. Not after this.

"Hey Cas-" He said. "Lemme ask you somethin."

Cas just barely gazed at him from his seat. "What is it?"

"Remember a while back me and Mary went to take care of that demon?" Cas nodded in answer. "He said something that at the time I thought was just bullshit. But... Now I'm starting to wonder if he was right."

Furrowing his brows, Cas gave him his full attention. "What did he say?"

After clearing his throat he went on. "He, uh- Said that Mary coming back here fucked up the universe or somethin. And cause of that the universe was trying to correct itself, or abort the problem. He said that all this shit is gonna keep happening to her, she's gonna keep getting hurt, or things worse than that. Could he have been right? Cause ya know, the kid hasn't exactly had much luck since coming here."

Cas' lips parted but he couldn't seem to form words. He actually had to look away and swallow a knot in his throat.

"It very well might be that, Dean." He said quietly. "Mary came back here for the specific reason to save Sam and yourself. Because of that, she very well might have set herself up for all of this."

"How the hell is that possible?"

"Because in her attempts to sparing Sam and yourself, someone has to bare the brunt of everything. As I've said time is fluent and all roads lead to the same destination, but... Instead of the negativity happening to you and your brother, it will happen to her. That way, certain events will still play out, only the details are slightly altered. But the end results will be better for you and Sam."

Dean felt the blood drain from his face.

"So, you're sayin that all this bad shit that was supposed to happen to me and Sam is gonna fall on her?"

Cas nodded. "If my theory is correct, yes."

"Shit..." He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. "How the hell can we stop that? How can we make sure that don't happen? What if we sent her back to her own time?"

Cas yet again looked at him, but his expression was baffling.

"Dean... Mary _can't _go back. It's impossible. She's been here too long and has altered too much by taking all of this onto herself."

"Yeah," Dean sighed. "Plus her deal is still intact. She couldn't go back because of that too. So we're just gonna have to find a way of fixing this."

"If I'm right," Cas went on. "Then I don't believe we _could_ fix it. Mary claimed that God himself was on our side and he intervened many times when this happened before. So, I can't help but wonder if perhaps he knows she's here and what her purpose is- He very well might be aware of it all and is going to allow it just so what happened in the future doesn't happen. God knows everything that will occur, past, present and future. He would've known from the beginning that Mary would come back here."

Dean glared at him with fire in his eyes. "So you're saying that god is willing to let all of this crap fall onto some poor kid?"

"Technically he's not responsible for this. Mary is. She came back here to do whatever she could to save you. Even if it means enduring pain, or anything worse than that she was willing to go through it so you wouldn't have to. This was her choice and if I'm right, God might agree with it."

Dean's jaw clenched and he had to physically hold himself back from putting his fist through the windshield.

"Well that's just fucking awesome!" He spat. "Don't I get a say in this? She's my daughter, I think I should be able to say whether or not I want her going through all that!"

Cas nodded in agreement.

"I know. I wish I could prevent it as well, but if this is really what's happening then the only one that can stop it would be Mary. And I think you and I both know that she'll never do that. Because she loves her family and wants to save it."

Dean suddenly slammed on the breaks and pulled off the road.

"No," He said. "There has to be something we can do to help her. Hell if she could zap herself back here to fix things then we should be able to fix _her_," He turned and seared his eyes into Cas'. "I know that if anyone besides me would be motivated to stop this then it'd be you, man. Cause whether you'll admit it or not, I know you care about her. So... Are you with me on this or what?"

Cas' expression didn't change from stern as he nodded. "You don't have to ask me that. You should already know the answer."

Dean turned back to the steering wheel and cranked the car into drive.

"Good." He said, the sped off again


	31. Chapter 31

_**Okay so I thought I'd ask opinions on what I should do. Pretty soon, maybe within the next 5-6 chapters it's gonna be the end of this first story, and I didn't know if I should start a completely new one for the remaining seasons or just keep posting chapters to this one- Since it would end up being really long in the end, I didn't know if that would deter anyone from actually reading it. Lemme know people :)**_

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I was back in that fancy room I was stuck in just before Lucifer was broke out. There were five angels in total standing guard, and no matter how many times I'd question them they wouldn't speak. I'd been here for a couple hours now and had no answers, so I had been pacing pretty much since I hit the floor. Even though I figured it'd be pointless to try and call my Dad, I checked my phone anyways- And of course I had no signal. Not that I could call him with five bouncers surrounding me.

"Alright boys," I heard a familiar voice say from behind me. "You can go."

I turned and looked at Zachariah, feeling my fists clench. "Fuck, not you again."

He smiled as his buddies zapped away. "I'm afraid so, Mary. Why don't you take a seat.

"Why? What the fuck is this about now? You got what you wanted last time when you read my memories, what the god damned hell do you want now?"

He continued to smile as he sat on the edge of the table. "You got quite a mouth on you young lady."

"Blow me-" I replied, crossing my arms. "Why am I here?"

"Sit," He raised his hand and a chair slid out. "I think we got off on the wrong foot the last time around."

"The wrong foot? You shoved fucking pins into my forehead and then left me for dead afterwards you asshole! Not to mention torturing the hell out of Cas."

"Like I said, wrong foot-" He pointed to the chair again. "Sit, let's talk."

I knew how this went already, if I didn't do what he said then he'd threaten those I cared about- So I sat, still keeping my arms crossed and wishing my eyes could burst him into flames.

"Okay talk."

He sighed and tapped his fingertips on the table. "I have an offer to make you, Mary. One that I'm sure you're going to want to take. You see, my superiors have been doing a lot of thinking lately, about what we learned from you. And we came to realize that if Dean could resist saying yes to Michael before, then what makes us believe he'd be anymore inclined to cooperate now?"

Oh shit... I knew where this was going already. "Hey, if you think that you can lure Dad here by holding me hostage and manipulate him into saying yes, then it ain't gonna happen dude."

"Oh, I know that," He nodded. "Yes, I know that all too well. Dean's not the type that can be manipulated. That's why we're willing to release your Father from that burden, he won't have to say yes-" He reached over and jammed his finger into my chest. "If _you _do."

"Wh-What?" I stuttered. "You're bullshitting me?"

"Nope," He stood and started around the table, keeping his hands behind his back. "You know that Dean might be Michael's true vessel, but he's not the _only_ vessel. Your bloodline is the key to everything, and normally we'd turn to their third brother Adam for the role, but- Having Dean Winchesters daughter is even better. Michael isn't choosy, male, female, he doesn't care as long as he gets the job done in the end."

"There's no way in hell I'd ever say yes to Michael." I spat back. "You're wasting your breath."

He sat down again and rested his elbows on the table, keeping his eyes locked on mine. "You haven't heard what I'm willing to offer if you accept, Mary."

"I don't care what you offer, I'm not doing it!"

"Even if I can promise that your Father and Sam will survive the battle, that they'll be protected through everything after it's over? And yes, I know Sam will have been possessed by Lucifer by that point, but after Lucifer's dead, we'll resurrect Sam, he can be with Dean and they'll live happily ever after."

"No." I shook my head. "Not happening."

"Okay, then how about we forget Castiel's betrayal, he'll no longer be cut off from heaven, his can be rank restored, how about that?"

I leaned forward. "_No_."

"You're a hard nut to crack, Mary-" He wagged his finger at me. "I think I'm starting to like you. Alright, if all of that's not enough, how about..." He smiled. "Your deal, I know all about it from reading your thoughts. You say yes, you get everything I mentioned, and after the battle's over and Michael leaves your body, I can promise that your deal will vanish. Poof, gone."

When I said nothing and only glared at him he sat back and let out a sigh.

"Mary, I admire your strength, I really do- But think about it this way. You came back here to save them, right? Your Dad and Sam? So, shouldn't you be willing to do whatever it takes to make sure you accomplish that? You wanted to be a martyr, you wanted to take everything that happened to your family away didn't you? Correct me if I'm wrong but doesn't something like this fall into that category?"

I swallowed hard and looked away. "This is different, me saying yes pretty much seals the deal on the world getting fucked over. And I'm not doing that. So, the answer is still no."

"If you don't say yes we'll force your Father into it," He replied, which made me go stiff. "We'll forget about Adam, we'll keep you here under lock and key and the only way he can save you is if he says yes. And I think you know he'll do it. On top of that... I'll have Castiel killed, and Sam can rot in hell for all eternity- And, after so many years go by you'll be right down there with him." His brows arched. "Don't trifle with me little girl. You won't win."

My eyes were filled with tears by now, which he clearly noticed. "I... Don't get it... If you think you can manipulate my Dad so easily then why're you trying to get _me _to say yes?"

"Because it's much easier, Mary. And whether I like to admit it or not it's not like we have all the time in the world to wait around for your Dad to make that decision. This battle has to happen, and yes I know we have to wait for Sam to say yes, but that won't take as long. He'll do it once he realizes there isn't any other way out of this." He sat back. "Look, I'm not a monster... Most of the time... So it's not as though you have to say yes just yet. All you have to do is give me your word that when the time comes you won't fight against us, you'll come with us willingly. In the mean time I'll even allow you to go back with your family, so... Not such a bad deal, right?"

Okay, so... All I had to do was say I agreed to it. It didn't mean I'd actually have to do it. They didn't know we knew about the Michael sword, so... What harm could it do, right?

I put my face in my hands and leaned against the table. "This is bullshit."

"Maybe so, but that's fate for you, Mary." Zach replied. "So, do we have a deal? Are you going to agree to this? Or, are we going to have to keep you here?"

"How-" I paused, swallowing. "How do I know that you're not just tricking me, and then end up conning Dad into saying yes anyways?"

"Because, like I said- This is easier. Try not to think about it so negatively. You're still going to get what I promised in the end. Your family will be safe, Castiel's rank will be restored and he'll no longer be cut off from heaven, and your deal will be gone. So, it's not so bad, right?"

"Fuck you." I spat. "How am I supposed to make that decision so quickly?"

"You don't," He stood again and buttoned his jacket. "You're going to stay here and stew for..." He shrugged. "Let's just say seventy two hours. After those three days are over, I'll come back, you'll give me your answer and then you can call your Father and he can come get you."

Three days, he expected for me to stay stuck in this room for three damn days? Apparently so because he zapped away before I could respond. And as it turns out they obviously had my "comfort" in mind. They gave me a tv, which just so happened to only air news broadcasts on all the hurricanes, earthquakes and typhoons caused from Lucifer, not to mention all the other things he was responsible for. Guess they were sending me a message, right? But other than the tv I was supplied with a never ending pile of burgers and bucket of beer, had a bathroom with a nice claw foot tub and marble floor, and a change of clothes.

Of course I checked my phone, but there was still no signal, so I spent the majority of the time pacing around the room and cussing at random objects. I couldn't bust out, I'd tried that shit already- And wherever I was at the moment was obviously _wayyy_ outside my coverage zone. Dad had to be freakin out by now, Cas too. Who knows what was going through their minds after I got zapped away.

No way did I believe Zach when he said this wasn't a trap for Dad. It had to have been. Just as it happened before when Adam was brought back, they used him to lure Dad to their little fancy room, then kicked the crap out of Sam and Adam to get Dad to say yes. And he almost did too, but for some reason he changed his mind at the last second and gave Zach an angel lobotomy with an angel blade. Had to admit, that part was worth the thought of being stuck in this room. That asshole needed to go.

But, the reason why Zach left me here in this room was, of course, because he figured after a while of being alone- I'd eventually come to the conclusion that he was right. And, as much as I hated to admit it, in a way he kinda was.

I was thinking of worse case scenarios here. Like, what if for some weird reason, the Michael sword wasn't in the box, or... It didn't work, something that would end up with us being screwed again. If that happened, then we'd have no other plans. Sam couldn't say yes, I really didn't think it would come down to that no matter what- But that's not saying Dad wouldn't. If Michael took a vessel, he could easily kill Lucifer with him being in such a weak one. If Zach did what he said he'd do, and held me hostage and threatened me with stomach cancer or whatever sick shit he'd do, Dad very well might say yes to Michael.

I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't come back here hoping to help them, hoping to keep Sammy from saying yes and then just sit back while my Dad did that very thing. No fucking way.

It was obvious to me before I came back here what was going to happen. In my hopes of saving Dad and Sam, I might end up having the crap kicked out of me more than once. It was worth it in my opinion if it meant at the end of all this mess Dad and Sam could actually be happy. If I could spare Sammy having to go through all this hell, and eventually going crazy because of it I'd do it. If I could spare Dad having to watch his brother suffer so much then hell yes I'd do it. If I could make sure that Cas didn't make so many mistakes, that he and Dad stayed best friends then all of the torture I might get was so incredibly worth it. You make sacrifices for your family, Dad always taught me that.

So that's why I decided if it came right down to it, if we had no other plans and no way out, I'd say yes to Michael in a fucking heart beat so Dad wouldn't have to. Because, what other choice did I have?

I just hoped and prayed it didn't come down to that- Because yeah I might be sparing my Dad, but saying yes to Michael would bring forth a whole shit storm of problems. If Michael and Lucifer fought then the world would be in the toilet.

After two days stuck in that room I was climbing the damn walls. I hadn't slept at all which of course didn't help my mind any, but I couldn't turn the stupid tv off. They wouldn't let me. It just kept replaying all of those news broadcasts over and over again until I was ready to ram my head into the nearest hard statue just to knock myself out.

They decided to start overloading me with coffee too apparently, and after what seemed like the hundredth cup I was so wired and fidgety I couldn't sit down.

Zachariah was a fucking dick.

I was literally starting to believe that they kept me locked in here for some sort of sick pyschological torture. No one to talk to, nothing to hear except for the apocalypse on tv, nothing to look at but for the paintings of Michael slaughtering Lucifer and demons running amok- It was enough to drive you insane. Not to mention I had my own thoughts that were pounding through my skull. All of the "what if" questions, wondering what might happen if I didn't agree to this arrangement, thinking if I slipped up just once then my family was screwed. Jesus, if I didn't get outa here soon I was gonna hang myself with one of the fancy drapes sectioning off this room from the bathroom.

It was after a near freak out that I had an epiphany of sorts. I wasn't acting like myself, at all... I was nervous and anxious and wanted to rip my hair out, so I realized that the reason for that was because they must have done something to the food and drink I had in here. I was almost certain they'd drugged me somehow with some kind of psycho drug that would make my mind play out the most horrible things I could imagine. It was another way for them to get me to say yes. My resistance was slipping. Seventy two hours was an odd number I figured to keep me trapped here. Why not two days, or a week, or a month? Why three days? Maybe that was how long it would take for their drugs to take affect.

Ugh no, I really was going to lose my mind here. I was sleep deprived, drugged with some kind of angelic poison, and the voices in my head were getting louder and louder.

That's when the three day mark hit and Zachariah decided to come back, smiling smugly like the cocky prick that he was.

"Well, Mary?" He asked. "Have you come to a decision?"

I wanted to puke, and I wished he was standing closer so I could projectile vomit in his face.

"I don't have much of a choice, do I?" I replied, from my twitchy position on the sofa.

"Sure you do. You just wouldn't like what would happen if you declined my offer."

No, I certainly wouldn't. Because if I said no then they'd go after Dad. Like I had thought before, if I agreed to this now- It didn't mean I'd have to end up going through with it.

"Okay," I said, hugging myself and shivering. "Okay I'll agree to it."

"What was that?" He stepped closer, sarcastically holding his hand to his ear. "I didn't quite hear you."

"I said I'll do it you fuck wad!" I snapped. "I'll come with you willingly when you need me to, okay!"

"How do I know you're not lying?"

I glared at him, enough so that his face fell flat. "Do I _look _like I'm lying?"

His head titled as he observed from afar. "No, but you do look like hell."

"That's your fault, what did you do to me anyways?"

"Oh nothing... Just slipped a little something in your food to make your thoughts more clear."

"Clear my ass!" I rubbed my head, the only way I could describe what it felt like was that my skull was full of bugs. "You got your answer, just please let me go now."

I couldn't help but ask myself if this is what Sam felt like once he started having his episodes in the future. If he did, god... I don't know how he dealt with it for so long, it was awful.

"Alright, once I'm gone you can call your Father. You should be out of here in no time. And remember, Mary-" His smile vanished. "You try to cross me, or go back on your word, they're done... Understand?"

"Yeah..." I sniffled. "I understand."

He looked skeptical, which wasn't all that surprising. I had every intention of screwing him over, but I couldn't let him know that. Still, he zapped away.

Once he was gone I pulled my phone out, noticing it was almost dead but at least I had signal bars now. So I quickly dialed Dad's number as well as I could with my hands shaking.

It rang literally half a ring before Dad picked up.

"Mary?" He said.

"Dad..." I said through chattering teeth. "C-Come get me... Please..."

"Where are you?" He was trying to stay calm for my sake, I could tell- But wasn't doing a very good job of it.

"Um... That fancy room-" I answered. "Where they took us when Sam busted Lilith out."

He relayed that message to Cas, since I could hear his voice in the background.

"Okay," He replied. "Sit tight, we'll be there asap."

I tried to respond with something else but my phone died, so I tossed it onto the table and laid back on the sofa.

I was obviously coming down from whatever drug they'd given me, and it wasn't a ball of sunshine. It was horrible. In my opinion it was similar to what Sam must've felt when he was coming off the demon blood.

But, it didn't take long for Dad and Cas to show up, since Cas could just zap him wherever he wanted to go. When they burst through the door both of them were ready for some kind of fight- But once they noticed the room was empty they eased up.

Dad rushed over and pulled me off the sofa and started inspecting me.

"Jesus," He said, staring into my eyes. "What the hell did they do?"

After Cas checked the room out he moved over and took my face into his hands.

"She's been drugged," He sighed, shaking his head. "It's beginning to leave her system."

"Drugged with what?" Dad replied.

Cas moved to the table and grabbed my near empty cup of coffee and took a whiff, afterwards he crushed the cup in his hands and looked ready to hulk smash the table.

"Nothing good." He answered. "We need to leave."

When he moved back to Dad and me, he zapped us away and back to where they'd left the Impala, which was on the side of the road out in the middle of no where.

Cas pulled me away from Dad and opened the backdoor and helped me inside, then followed and slammed the door. Dad rushed to the drivers side and hopped in.

"Does she need to go to a hospital?" He asked after throwing gravel when he peeled away.

"No, they wouldn't be able to do anything," Cas answered. "She needs to sleep it off and let it leave her system naturally."

He pretty much forced me to lay down in the backseat, and afterwards laid his hand across my forehead. His eyes closed as he focused on something, I didn't know what- And after a few long seconds his brows squeezed together.

"What did they want from you, Mary?" He asked now.

"What?" I garbled back.

"The drug they gave you, it's used to cause psychosis- They only stoop to that level when they're trying to get something they really want where their normal tortures would be ineffective."

"What you mean?" Dad asked, turning to take a quick peak at us.

"Basically it brings forth your worst nightmares, breaks you down piece by piece over a short amount of time. At the finish, the one on the receiving end is so worn down mentally they would be convinced to say or do just about anything."

"Shit..." Dad replied. "Did they do it for more information you think?"

Everything was starting to go fuzzy, and I barely heard myself say, "I said yes."

"Yes?" Cas tapped my cheek so I wouldn't fall asleep. "Yes to what?"

I reached up and grabbed his hand. "To Michael."

Even though I could barely see straight I noticed Cas' eyes go wide.

"What?!" Dad shouted from the front. "What the hell does that mean?!"

"No..." Cas breathed out. "That can't be."

"Cas, talk to me dammit. What the fuck does that mean?!"

He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. "They manipulated her into saying yes to Michael. To becoming his vessel."

But did they really manipulate me? Honestly I wasn't sure anymore. Yeah, I had thought that I could say yes and fuck them over later, but was that my own coherent thoughts? Or their drug induced crazy ones?

Dad went silent, and I didn't have to look at him to know that he was ready to pound some faces in.

"Why would they do that?" Dad replied, his voice was barely audible. "I thought it was supposed to be me?"

"It was, but it doesn't mean they wouldn't resort to using another of your bloodline if they felt you weren't going to cooperate." Cas answered. "Which means if she's already given her consent, Michael can take her anytime he wants."

But did I actually say _yes _yes? I couldn't remember. I know I'd said that I agreed to go with them willingly when they wanted me to, but would that be considered a yes?

"Mary," Cas shook me by the shoulders when I felt myself drifting off. "You have to tell me what was said to the exact. I need to know."

But I couldn't open my eyes anymore, and staying awake was impossible. I finally stopped fighting it and drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

When I finally started to come around, my head was pounding. Yet again, I felt like I had the worst hang over of my life. My ears felt stuffed full of cotton, my eyes were blurry, and the room was spinning in circles. I was in a motel bed, obviously- And there was rain pelting the windows outside.

First off I noticed Dad sitting at the table, resting his head on his hands and looking himself that he was trying not to fall asleep. Cas was standing by the window with his arms crossed, and neither of them were speaking. They only snapped out of it when I shifted from under the covers.

Dad reached me first, practically tripping over his own feet as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Hey, hey-" He said, laying his hand on my shoulder. "You don't gotta move around yet. Just stay still."

"Mm' okay," I tried to say, but it came out as slurred crap.

"No you're not," He replied. "You were coming off that shit pretty hard, kid."

"How are you feeling?" Cas asked.

"Friggin dandy-" I spat. "Where are we?"

"Kentucky," Dad answered. "Just outside of Louisville."

"Mary," Cas moved closer and stood beside Dad. "We need to know what happened. I know it's an inappropriate time to ask, but..."

"Fucking Zachariah," I interrupted, rubbing my hands on my face. "He's a dick."

"What'd he do?" Dad asked, nudging me. "Don't worry about what I'm gonna say, just tell me what happened."

I peaked out at him through my fingers and sighed. "He brought me there cause he decided that instead of you being Michael's vessel, they want it to be me."

"And?"

"And..." I sat up. "He offered me all of this shit if I accepted."

"What did he offer?" Cas asked.

"Dad and Sam's safety for one," I answered. "You, your rank restored and you wouldn't be cut off from heaven anymore, and me- My deal nixed."

Dad sighed and pursed his lips. "Dammit... Please tell me you didn't say yes, Mary?"

"Not exactly. He didn't really flat out say I was saying yes to Michael right now. He just wanted me to agree that when the time came they wanted me to say yes, that I wouldn't fight against them."

"So you agreed?" Cas leaned against the coffee table, practically knocking the lamp on the floor.

"I kinda didn't have a choice but to agree to that. If I didn't then he said he was gonna either kill you guys, or lock me up and force _you _into saying yes, Dad." They didn't look at me after that and instead stared at each other. "I figured that even if I did agree to it it wouldn't matter, it's not like I gotta go through with it, right?"

"So," Cas finally directed his attention at me. "You didn't say yes? He didn't flat out ask you if you would be a vessel?"

"No, he didn't phrase it like that. He just said that when the time came, they didn't want me to fight em when they came after me."

Cas nodded but didn't speak, and Dad sat there trying to read his expression before saying, "Well? What you think?"

"I think..." Cas sighed. "That it could be a trick. To lure you into saying yes anyhow."

"Or?"

"Or they really have moved on from you and would rather use Mary, because it's simpler."

"That's what Zach said." I nodded. "That since they read my memories before and knew that Dad resisted them til the last second, that it would just be easier to use me."

Dad handed me a glass of water which I quickly gulped down. "So, you think Mary's safe?"

"For the moment, if she didn't say yes to Michael right off then he can't take her. But that doesn't mean Zachariah won't make things difficult later. Especially once he realizes she has no intention of going peacefully."

"We just gotta end this before it comes to that." Dad said, then stood.

I glanced around the room only then noticing we were one man short. "Uh, where's Sam?"

"After the angels took you, him and Bobby went on to Kansas," Dad answered. "Went to talk to Larry Ganem."

I nearly spat my water in his face. "Was it him?"

"Yes," Cas went on. "And he was reluctant to speak at first, until Sam convinced him he was Henry Winchesters grandson. Then of course he couldn't wait to tell him everything."

"Holy crap," I sat up further. "So, did he say anything about the place in New York?"

"Yep," Dad nodded. "Sammy and Bobby are headin up there now, we're gonna meet them just as soon as you're on your feet."

"What the frick," I kicked the covers off. "I'm ready now, let's go!"

My boots were laying on the floor beside my bed, so I quickly grabbed them.

"Mary, not yet-" Dad said, and normally in these situations he'd sound like a bossy Dad, but this time it was mainly just concern. "Just take it easy for five friggin minutes will ya? Come on, you were shot less than a month ago and now you were roofied by dick bag angels- Take a day to rest. Please?"

He was giving me that look, the one he always gave me in the future that told me he wasn't pissed but pretty much crushed. I wasn't sure why exactly, it's not like what happened was his fault. Although, considering it was my Dad it wasn't all that surprising. I stubbed my toe be blamed himself, I got a hang nail he blamed himself, it was just in his nature. That's the problem with taking the lead over a family, if something happens to go wrong he'd blame himself and feel like hammered shit because of it.

"Yeah, okay-" I nodded, climbing back into bed. "I'll wait a day."

He gave a weak smile. "Good, so just sit tight I'm gonna go grab some take out or something. Need to get some food in you."

I waited until he grabbed his keys and left the room, and for the sound of the Impala peeling out of the drive before I looked to Cas.

"What's wrong with him?" I asked.

He sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Everything I suppose."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," He looked me straight in the eye. "He's angry, upset and every other negative emotion a man can feel, over what's been happening to you- Because you're here taking every ounce of pain that's meant for Sam and himself in your attempts of altering the future."

I looked away and tried to bite back crying, focusing on anything and everything in the room that might take my mind off the tears that were threatening to fall. Just as always one managed to escape and roll down my cheek.

"Yeah, well-" I sniffed, wiping it away. "I gotta do what I gotta do."

"Do you?" He forced me to look at him. "Because you could always prevent it."

"No, Cas- I can't. Because then me coming back here would've been pointless. The entire reason why I came here was because I wanted to help you guys."

"Even if it means you could be killed?"

Going by the look in his eyes he was expecting a different answer then what I gave him.

"If that's what happens then I can't stop it. All I know is that in the end, if it's better for all of you then it's worth it." I tried to force the sadness away with a laugh. "Ya know, I don't really get why you're so worried about what's goin on with my Dad anyways."

"What do you mean?"

"Well you don't really consider him a friend yet, do you?"

He squinted at me. "Of course I do. Your Father and I do share a profound bond."

I leaned against the pillows and smirked. "What exactly does that mean anyways? You always said that and I never really understood."

I could tell he was annoyed I'd changed the subject on him.

"I've seen your Father in his most vulnerable state, since I was the one who raised him from hell. I was the one that pieced him back together and made him whole again. It wasn't something that happened overnight, it took weeks. Which means that he and I have seen each other at our worst. I fought through all of hell to get to him and reached him first, which wasn't an easy task, and I pulled him out and brought him back. I fixed all of the corruption from his time spent in the pit, all of the pain and anguish- I witnessed it first hand." He sighed. "When two beings experience something like that together, in my opinion it bonds them. I thoroughly believe that I know your Father better than anyone else could."

Yeah, he was probably right about that. He probably knew Dad better than me and Sammy combined.

"Cas... What was it like... Down there when you found him?"

He kept his eyes firmly planted on my lap after I asked that question.

"Mary, that's something that I'll never tell you, I'm sorry. Some things are better left unsaid." He scooted closer. "And you can't avoid what we were discussing, no matter how much you try, so... Do you really believe that your Father, or me, would ever let you go through all of this? I won't let it, I'll stop it somehow even if it means locking you in the bunker."

I gave him a crooked smile. "I love it when you get all forceful like that, it's kinda hot."

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Mary, be serious."

"I _am _serious. I'm also serious when I say that it ain't your call what happens to me. I came back here knowing it could be crappy, and I accepted it. So, you have to too."

When it all came down to it, it was my decision. I was an adult, not a kid- And yeah they might not've liked it but they were just gonna have to deal with it. Because I sure as hell wasn't gonna back down because of a little pain here and there.


	32. Chapter 32

_**Well I still have no idea what I'm gonna do when it comes time to write the other seasons. Half of you said to make a brand new story, the other half said to keep posting chapters in this one. Lol. Confffuussedddd..**_

* * *

To say I was surprised when Cas zapped us to the location in New York would be an understatement. Actually, I was more along the lines of confused. Sam had texted us the coordinates where this hidden bunker was supposed to be, which was smack dab in the middle of a forest. And, surprise surprise- There wasn't any signs of a door. And, after an hour of walking through a foot of snow freezing our asses off, and tripping over felled trees and dodging squirrels, we hadn't found a damn thing.

I was beginning to wonder if poor Larry Ganem was completely senile since it seemed he'd given us the coordinates for jack squat.

"Have we been goin in friggin circles?" Dad asked. "Cause it sure as hell feels like it."

"Yes," Cas answered. "We've passed those sets of trees three times now."

"I don't get it," Sam said, stopping to look at his map. "This is where he said it'd be... So where the hell is it?"

"Maybe the guy was lying?" I suggested. "Coulda been he didn't believe you when you said you were Henry Winchesters grand kid."

"Yeah, maybe-" Sam sighed. "So, what do we do now?"

"Keep lookin," Dad answered. "Just in case. Cas, why don't you zap around and see if you can find a door."

After a nod Cas did just that, but was only gone for a few seconds before returning.

"No door." He said. "Nothing but trees."

"Awesome." Dad said sarcastically, throwing his arms up in the air. "So maybe the old guy was wanting us to get lost out here and eventually eaten by wild moose or something."

"Uh," Sam chuckled. "There aren't moose in..."

"Shut up, I know!"

"Well there's one moose..." I said, looking to Sam- But seeing is that Crowley hadn't started giving him that nickname yet he didn't get it. "Never mind."

"Are you idgets gonna stop bellyaching and keep looking? Or are we just gonna stand out here and get frost bite?" Bobby barked.

So we started making one big ass circle for the gazillionth time, and I followed Dad and Cas past a set of trees and to a partial clearing that was covered in crumbled rocks and branches. Dad and I went one way while Cas moved to the center.

"Perhaps it's not in this exact location?" Cas offered. "Or, maybe over the years it's deteriorated due to harsh weather and..."

His words cut off when the ground suddenly collapsed under his feet and he fell through and hit the ground below with a grunt. Dad and me rushed over and peaked over the edge, noticing him sprawled on his back looking none too happy that actually happened.

"Oh look," Dad said. "The angel fell."

"Ho!" I snapped back.

"Come on, Cas- There's stairs right there," Dad went on, pointing to a set of stone steps leading down the hole. "You always gotta have a dramatic entrance don't you?"

"I don't find this one bit funny," He replied, zapping himself back up to behind us. "It was an accident clearly."

Dad only sniggered. "Yo Sam, Bobby! We found it!"

Down in the hole it was like a scene out of some treasure hunting movie. There were stone pillars that were cracked and covered in cobwebs and dust- And past that was an thick iron door that was obviously locked. Covering the rock walls were warding sigils and devils traps, but since everything was crumbled and dilapidated most of them were too chipped to be effective. Seeing is that Cas managed to fall in the hole without getting trapped or zapped, it didn't seem this place was as heavily guarded as our bunker in Kansas. If the place hadn't of been covered over then there was a good chance it coulda been busted in to.

Sam and Bobby rushed through the trees a few seconds later and we started down the steps.

"You think this place could be booby trapped?" I asked. "You know, like in those video games, Tomb Raider, you step on a certain stone and poisonous darts shoot out at us?"

"This isn't Indiana Jones, kid-" Dad replied. "But, yeah you never know what kinda extremes the Men of Letters would actually go to."

"I'll go first then," Cas offered, pushing past Dad and me. "Just to be safe."

I was actually only kidding about that, but just our luck we'd not consider that and then get our asses kicked by some hidden booby trap. But as it turns out it was just my over active imagination, because Cas had no issues walking in between the pillars and straight to the door.

We followed after him and Dad pulled our bunker key from his pocket. "Here goes nothin."

According to Larry our key was the _only _key for the bunkers, and according to him there were only two that he knew about, so if there were anymore scattered around the U.S we didn't know.

With a deep breath Dad shoved the key in the lock and it unlocked with a click. He struggled afterwards to get the door open since it was pretty much rusted shut, so Cas stepped up and yanked it open.

A cloud of dust and a rank smell of mildew flew out in our faces afterwards, and Dad pulled a flashlight and flicked it on.

The first thing I could see was darkness and dust flying around, past that there was clearly things stacked in boxes or shelves but I couldn't make out much details. Cas stepped in first, still just in case there'd be some kind of trap but apparently there wasn't anything. He turned a small circle then reached for something near the door and with a staticky snap flicked on the electrical box. The lights flickered for a moment before coming on full force and I know I'm not the only one that stood there with my eyes wide after that.

This room was friggin enormous, and not only that it was like we'd stepped back in time. Marble floors, a domed ceiling with a fresco painting and a massive crystal chandelier dangled in the middle. And yeah the decor was shocking of course, but I think we were mainly overwhelmed by the sheer abundance of artifacts that was being stored in there.

"Holy crap," Dad said, taking a step inside. "We got our work cut out for us with this one."

I followed after him and my eyes went straight to the far left hand wall where a glass display case sat that was filled with swords, daggers and other ancient looking weapons.

"Uh," Sam snickered. "What the hell are we supposed to do about all this stuff?"

"Can't really box it all up and take it with us," Bobby answered. "Course leavin it all here don't sound like a very good plan either."

"This place is warded like the other bunker," Sam went on. "Which means no one can find it, and without the key no one's getting in either."

Cas moved to a random wooden crate that was sitting near a long oak table and pulled the lid off. Inside was glass jars and bottles filled with random herbs and potions.

"I haven't seen some of these in centuries," He stated. "Several of these herbs went extinct ages ago." He grabbed a random jar that was filled with what looked like petrified pieces of fruit. "This is from the tree of life."

Sam immediately marched over and snatched the jar from his hand. "Are you serious?"

"I didn't even know there was an actual tree of life." Dad added.

"What we don't know could fill this damn room." I chuckled. "Apparently."

Bobby stopped next to a suit of armor that had some sort of sigil engraved into the chest. "We should get started, the key to the box ain't gonna just jump into our hands."

Sam nodded and pulled a paper from his pocket. "If Larry was right, everything should be categorized. Weapons and things like that are-" He stopped and scaled his eyes over the disarray. "Everywhere apparently. Looks like we're gonna have to sift through all this crap."

Why couldn't we get really _really _lucky and the key would be sitting on a pedestal right in front of us? I had no idea where to start so just went to a random crate and pulled the lid off. Inside was stuffed full of books, and as much as I wanted to check them out and see what they were- I put the lid back on and moved on down the line.

Everyone else got to work too, and it was a little hard not to get distracted by the sheer abundance of crap in this room. And when I say crap, I mean actual crap. I know all of this was supposed to be important, but there were just random piles of what looked like broken pottery and glass- Jars filled with shredded pieces of paper and even a box filled completely with straw and nothing else. I know that the Men of Letters claimed that this room was supposed to be a safe house for precious artifacts but to me it seemed more along the lines of their garbage room. Other than the suit of armor towards the door, and the display case full of weapons- It was just a big old mess in here.

"Oh awesome, look at this." Dad said, waving us over. "A box full of keys. If the Michael sword key is in there how the fuck are we supposed to know which one it is?"

"I highly doubt they'd throw something of such importance in a pile of more keys." Cas replied. "Chances are it will be in it's own protective container, possibly a box similar to the one the sword is locked in. Or, at least something warded. If I got close enough I would feel the jolt."

So he started moving around the massive room, dragging crates and boxes down from where they were stacked and shoving random objects out of the way. We got started in with what we were previously doing, and after three hours and coming up with nothing I was starting to get a sinking feeling in my stomach.

Please _pleaseee_ don't let it be that we'd come all this way for nothing. Please don't let it be that the key didn't exist or had been taken a long ass time ago.

"Other than that box with dried plants and weird liquids in em," Dad said. "There doesn't seem to be anything here that's worth looking at. Why is that?"

"Good question," Sam sighed, moving across the room and to the display case. "It's almost like it's a ruse or something."

"Ruse?" Bobby questioned. "How so?"

"Like, if someone managed to bust in here and they'd find a room full of worthless crap it might make them give up and leave, without finding what could actually be hidden here."

He opened the display case and pulled out a random spear. "Look at this, it's old sure, maybe from the early 1600's, but by how deteriorated it is and how it was displayed in the case, it's not anything that's important." He laid it aside now. "All of the things we've found in our bunker, they've all been taken care of to the max- Each in their own protective boxes or cases... I don't get it."

"I halfway expect to turn something over and find a tag that says 'Made in China'." I added.

"And Larry didn't say anything about this?" Dad asked, after tossing aside yet another piece of worthless crap.

"Nope, just that what we were looking for would probably be here." Sam answered. "Even though I didn't tell him what we were looking for exactly, only that the files I read said it would be here."

"Well, let's stick it out for another hour or so, then I say we go get food." Dad finished. "I'm starving."

I had a feeling we were gonna be working all night without a break.

* * *

It was near three in the morning when I stopped to take a breather, obviously I had fallen asleep on the floor because when my eyes opened I had Cas' trench coat draped over me and Dads wadded up under my head as a pillow. At first glance around the room, it didn't seem they'd found anything yet. Bobby was passed out in a chair and Dad and Sam looked ready to fall over too. Cas was sifting through what seemed like the billionth box, while the others we'd already gone through were stacked off to the side.

"Still nothing?" I grumbled, sitting up.

"Nope." Dad answered. He grabbed a cup of coffee from the table and held it out to me. "Caffeine. Juice yourself up, it's cold but it'll still work."

After chugging down half of the cold coffee I pulled myself up and walked over to Cas who had his head buried in a box.

"Thanks." I said, holding out his coat.

He gave a weak smile before throwing it back on. "You're welcome."

After a quick peak in the box I could see it full of random papers written in another language.

"So what'd you think?" I asked. "You think this was a pointless trip?"

He sighed and shook his head. "I hate to think that, Mary. Because then it would mean we have no other plan."

"Yeah, seriously starting to think the world is trying to fuck us sideways."

"I don't know exactly what that means," He replied with his brows raised. "But if I were to guess then I'd have to agree with you."

I started through another crate finding nothing but what I seriously thought was charcoal before I noticed Sam was yet again hovering near the display case. When he leaned back against the wall and then pointed his flashlight through the small space he stood tall.

"Holy crap," he said. "Cas get over here and move this."

We all rushed over as Cas shoved the case to the side revealing another locked door behind it.

"Damn," Bobby said. "Why didn't we think of that six hours ago."

Dad pulled the key and unlocked it and it creaked open showing a long dark hallway. Sam stepped forward with his flashlight and felt along the walls until flicked on another light. Each bulb that lit up crackled and fizzled before snapping on one by one down the hall.

"Okay," Dad said. "Who's for goin down the creepy tunnel?"

By this point we were all ready for that so Dad led the way. And the difference between this area and the room we just came from was the walls and ceiling were solid iron. It was far from elegant, it was cold and creepy and the popping lights overhead didn't provide any comfort either. The hallway made a slight curve before we stopped and noticed yet another locked door at the end.

"Jeez, how many more are we gonna come across, huh?" Dad grumbled.

Still he stomped forward and unlocked it, yanking it open afterwards. The lights from the hallway moved through to this new room which was smaller, round in shape as well, and also covered in solid iron. It was completely empty but for a table sitting in the center of the floor which was one giant devils trap. On top, which was gonna make me pee my pants, was a small black box. Almost identical to the one the Michael sword was locked in.

"Holy shit," I said. "Is that it?"

Cas moved as close as possible to take a better look. "It has the same warding spells as the first box, so if I was to speculate- I would say yes."

Okay, I was trying not to get overly excited, seeing is that we never had much luck with anything- But it was a little hard not to. I didn't even realize that I was squeezing the life out of Cas' hand until he entwined his fingers with mine. One little stroke of luck though, this box wasn't locked- Thank god. I guess the warding on it was considered enough protection.

"So I think Mary should do the honors." Dad said, nudging me. "Since she's the one that found the info on the Michael sword in the first place."

He didn't have to ask me twice- I practically danced my way to the box and stopped, taking a few deep breaths before opening the lid.

Think positive, I told myself- We were gonna get lucky this time and not crapped on for the millionth time. So I pried the lid off and could only gape inside the box with my breath in my throat.

Yes, fuck yes! There was a key in there! First thoughts were it was pretty damn intricate for a friggin skeleton key. It looked like it was made of solid gold, and it was small. My fingers twitched anxiously at my side before I reached in and scooped it up.

"Okay," I said. "Let's not get our hopes up here, but-" I turned and held it up in the air. "At least there's a key, right?"

Dad stomped forward after that and immediately grabbed me and scooped me up twirling me in a small circle. Yeah, he wasn't going by what I said about not getting our hopes up, but somehow- I had a good feeling about this. Something told me that once, finally, things were gonna go right for us and it was gonna end good, instead of bad.


	33. Chapter 33

_**Thanks again for the reviews everyone :)**_

* * *

It was funny how we stood around the box with the key and hadn't opened it yet. I guess we were all trying to delay what could've been an empty box with no Michael sword. Cas was standing off to the side, just as he had when we first found the thing and even though I could tell he was wondering what was taking us so damn long, he didn't speak. It finally took Bobby letting out a sigh and grumbling for us to snap out of it.

"Open the damn thing already," He said. "We ain't gettin any younger."

Dad had been twirling the key in his hand for a couple minutes- Then without saying anything finally shoved it in the lock and gave it a nice twist. Obviously we got the right key, because it didn't melt and it snapped open pretty damn quickly. He cast everyone a quick glace before yanking the lid off in one swift motion, then taking a step back.

The first one that actually had the nerve to approach the box was Cas, apparently after it was opened the warding on it broke. He didn't even hesitate to reach inside and pull out a blade. It was almost the same size as a regular angel blade but much more ornate. Instead of being silver it was gold, with a jewel encrusted hilt.

"Well?" I asked, holding my breath. "That's it... Right?"

He held it in front of his face and observed it closely before arching his brows. "I imagine so."

"You _imagine _so?" Dad scowled. "Uh, if we're gonna go stabbing Lucifer with it then we need to be friggin positive."

Cas returned a scowl. "Would you like for me to stab myself in the heart with it to be certain?"

Yeah he was "joking" but with him it was always hard to tell since he never changed the tone of his voice.

"Uh," Sam chuckled. "Don't think that's necessary, Cas. But yeah, we don't really know if it's the real deal or not."

"There's one way to find out," Cas replied then pulled up the his left sleeve. "If it's an actual angelic weapon then-"

"Whoa wait a second," Dad said before I could. "You're not actually gonna-"

Yep, he was. Before Dad could finish his sentence Cas cut a deep gash on the underside of his arm. Seeing is that he actually cringed in pain and a sliver of white light gushed out from the cut, we had to conclude it wasn't just a regular old pig sticker.

"Jesus, Cas-" I barked and stomped forward. Bobby handed me a handkerchief from his pocket and I wrapped it around the wound that was bleeding all over the floor. "Not so deep next time, Einstein."

He flinched slightly as I tightened the handkerchief to stop the bleeding. "It was the only way to know for certain, and since it's actually caused that much damage to my vessel then yes- I have to say it's the _'real deal'_."

Dad reached over and snatched the blade away. "Just in case you decide to saw off a foot or something."

Cas only squinted at him before rolling down his sleeve.

"Well, we know now-" Sam sighed. "So, all that's left to figure out is what we're gonna do with the thing. Are we gonna use it as an actual sword, or... Are we gonna do what Dean suggested?"

So we all sat down at the table in the library and didn't speak. We'd been there long enough for Dad to grab the box and bring it back up here, and hadn't even shown Bobby around the place yet. Although he seemed impressed with the bunker already, even with seeing so little.

"Pros and cons," Dad said, thumping his knuckle on the table. "Start naming em."

I observed in silence, waiting for someone to speak- The first was Sam.

"There's downsides to both I think," He started. "On one hand we'd have to find some way of actually getting close enough to Lucifer to stab him with it, and then on the other we take the risk of ruining the weapon at all by melting it down into bullets."

Dad sighed and rolled his eyes. "Big help, Sammy."

"Just laying it out on the table, Dean-" Sam defended. "It's not like we're all not thinking it."

"But," I said, looking to Cas. "Would melting it down into bullets make it ineffective?"

He kept his eyes fixed on the blade. "I would say no- Because it doesn't seem to alter the effects when melting down a regular angel blade."

"So, if it were up to you-" I went on. "What would you do?"

He reached across the table and grabbed the blade again. "If it relied on me to make the decision," He sighed. "I would advise forming some sort of distraction, for instance someone would have to keep Lucifer occupied while another used the weapon. In my opinion the best way for it to work would be to melt it down, because Dean was right when he said that Lucifer wouldn't expect us to actually shoot him."

"When you say distraction," Bobby asked. "What'd you mean by that?"

"The only one in this room that Lucifer would expect to come after him would be myself. Harming Sam is the last thing he would want to do, so he would have to fire the fatal shot."

"But," Dad said. "If you'd actually do that- Go after Lucifer I mean, he'd probably-"

"Kill me," Cas nodded. "I'm well aware of that."

"Then that ain't an option," Dad shook his head. "No one's dying with this thing."

"Be realistic, Dean." Cas rose his eyes to Dad's. "We all know what's at stake if we fail. Personally I'm willing to take the risk if it means ending this before it even begins." Now he moved his eyes to me, and he must've seen my horrified expression. "Sometimes you have to make sacrifices for something you feel strongly about."

I was about to snap at him when Dad beat me to it.

"No, either we go in this smart or we don't go in at all. No one is gonna sacrifice themselves, no one's gonna die. The whole damn point of Mary comin back here was because she wanted to change what happened. In her version Sammy was the one that ended up dying- Just because that's not happening now doesn't mean you're gonna jump up next in line to get ganked." Now he reached over and grabbed the blade, slamming it down in front of him. "So we melt it down... Then what?"

Cas didn't say anything else from there on out and I think in a way he was kinda surprised that Dad was so defensive over him possibly dying. What surprised me about that too, was that Dad wasn't only getting pissed just because _I_ was upset over it- He really didn't want anything to happen to Cas. Guess it was easy to say that Dad didn't hate him anymore.

"That's gonna take a while," Bobby answered. "Maybe two, three days- Hell, since it's an angelic weapon it might be more difficult."

"So we have enough time to come up with a plan that's solid," Sam nodded. "No rushing into anything this time."

"Um, guys," I sat up straight. "I think there's something we gotta talk about before coming up with any plans." The way they were looking at me, they must've figured I was gonna announce some doomed thing from the future. "I think it's safe to say that eventually Zachariah is gonna come after me, right? Since he thinks I'm gonna agree to be Michael's vessel it's only a matter of time before him and his asshole buddies show up again."

"Okay, and?" Dad replied.

I huffed out a deep breath. "Well think about it- What if he manages to take off with me again and I got all this info about the Michael sword and bullets and all that shit, don't you think that would be dangerous for us?"

Dad narrowed his eyes at me. "He's not taking you again, Mary."

"You can't say that for sure, you never know what's gonna happen. I'm sure you thought before that he wasn't gonna take off with me, but he did." I sat back and crossed my arms. "So, we need to do something about all this info that I know."

"What are you suggesting?" Cas asked. "That we wipe your memory?"

"Only bits and pieces," I nodded. "Like all of the things I know about the Michael sword."

Dad swallowed hard and looked to Cas. "Is that something you can do?"

"I could, but I'm reluctant to actually do it. If I do then those memories are gone permanently." Cas answered.

"Big deal," I snapped. "So I won't remember the Michael sword, that won't kill me- It'll probably actually save all our asses if I don't remember just in case Zachariah decides to kidnap me again."

"It's not fucking necessary," Dad practically bit my head off. "Cause you're not going anywhere."

Okay this was clearly not about erasing my memories of the damn sword.

"Dad," I said, reaching over and taking his hand. "This doesn't have anything to do with you watching out for me. This is about being smart."

I guess he felt like if he admitted something like this was necessary, it was as though he was admitting that he couldn't protect me. Yeah of course I knew he wanted to, and he would try his best to do it- But you never know what might happen in the future, especially when it involved dick angels. Sometimes I wished it was easy to pound things like that into Dad's head, so he wouldn't always blame himself if something went wrong. We were humans, they were almighty celestial beings- Not really a fair comparison I guess so it was smart to assume that something could go wrong.

But he wasn't ready to assume that though, I could tell he was still pissed at the thought of everything- Despite it, he had no choice but to agree.

"Yeah, okay-" He cleared his throat. "But we'll deal with that later. No sense erasing your memories yet since we haven't even had the sword twenty minutes."

Well, at least I wasn't gonna have to fight with him over that. I hated arguing with my Dad, especially in the future. It was kind of like two bulls headbutting each other, we were both equally stubborn and refused to admit when we were wrong- Which obviously meant it was a completely pointless argument. Thankfully though we never really did it that much. We always had a good relationship. Of course I had to admit that the only reason why our arguments ended was because Dad always felt guilty for raising his voice to me. I guess that was his fear of sounding or acting like his own Father, which was something he was always content with avoiding. Basically, I got away with a lot of shit when I was younger just because Dad didn't wanna yell at me.

I silently excused myself after that and went to make dinner for everyone. We'd been on the road for what felt like months- And since we were in a hurry to get back, the most we'd ate was crap from gas stations. Besides, I needed a minute to myself to try and calm down from everything that happened.

It was kinda hard to believe that we'd actually found that damn sword. And, what was even more amazing was that we managed to find it without anyone else knowing about it. At least, I didn't think so. We hadn't spoken to or told anyone about it since I found that file in the box- And when Sam went to talk to Larry Ganem, he didn't give away too much info either. So there really wasn't a way for anyone to know what we'd been doing. Of course, I wasn't willing to go and say I was positive about that though. Cause it was kinda hard to know what Lucifer or Michael could know.

I was in a daze the rest of the day, until Dad gave me an assignment to start researching for any traces of where Lucifer might've been. Just because we couldn't go after the asshole yet didn't mean that we couldn't try to keep track of him. Which wasn't easy, not that that was surprising. He's the friggin devil, not some regular old ghost or vampire. Being a crafty s.o.b had kept him alive so far after breaking out of his cage, he wasn't gonna fuck up now.

It was well past midnight and I was still clicking around on Sam's laptop that I'd stolen from him when he went to grab a beer- And I couldn't help but notice that Cas' shadow had passed from under my door at least five times now. He was pacing the hallway, and had been for the better part of an hour. He must've been bored, because it was completely silent out there, so everyone else must have gone to bed too. Bobby was crashing here for the week to help us out with the sword, so it was like one big slumber party.

As far as my researching went, it was kinda hard to track the dick bag when there were signs all over the country that he was there. Hurricanes and other big time storms, tornadoes and earthquakes. Yeah, I wasn't really getting anywhere- And after watching Cas' shadow for the tenth time go past my door, I sighed and closed the laptop and tiptoed to the door.

I opened it just as he was passing again and gave him a smirk.

"What're you doing out here, Cas? You've walked past my door like twenty times now."

He stopped and I watched his eyes shift back and forth. "Well, everyone was sleeping, and I didn't have much else to do so..."

"So you felt like tap dancing in front of my door?"

"I wasn't..." He stopped and nodded. "You're joking."

"You're catching on." I smiled. "Okay, I got an idea since you're bored."

"I never claimed I was bored..."

Now I crossed my arms and huffed out a sigh. "You wanna come in here or not?"

"Well if you were resting, I-" He cut off when he noticed my expression. "Oh... Are you talking about-"

"No, I thought we'd play Pictionary..." I paused and his brows furrowed. "Yes, Cas- I'm talking about _that _so are you coming in or what?"

He shifted on his feet before taking a few quick glances towards Dad and Sam's doors, then pushed past me and entered my room. I only snickered and shook my head before closing the door behind me.

* * *

"You know," I said as I bandaged Cas' arm. "You shoulda told me that this hadn't healed yet. Maybe I wouldn't have tackled you."

He fidgeted under the blanket and stared down at the blood droplets on the sheet. "I suppose I'd forgotten about it."

"Why hasn't this healed yet anyways?"

"Wounds caused from angelic weapons don't heal as quickly as wounds from normal weapons. But it should be fine by morning."

I nodded. "Yeah guess that makes sense. When that asshole shot you it took you hours to get over it, right?"

"Yes, which can be a nuisance at times-" He watched me wrap his arm in gauze. "Mary... Aren't you worried?"

"About what?"

He sat up slightly. "Well this time wasn't so... Silent. Aren't you worried the others would have heard what we were doing in here?"

"Oh that?" I snorted out a laugh. "Yeah these walls are solid concrete, the sound's pretty muffled in here so we don't have to worry about that."

He nodded and eased up slightly- Judging by how stiff he had been it seemed as though he expected Dad to come flying into the room swinging a machete. We fell silent as I finished with his bandage, then laid down again and made myself comfortable.

This was only the second night he and I had spent together- But it was funny how he seemed to be so comfortable already. He held me from behind and I settled in for some actual sleep, but stopped myself.

"Hey Cas, will you promise me something?" I asked.

"Of course, if it's within my capability." He replied.

"Promise me," I hesitated, and awkwardly picked at the blanket. "Promise that you're not gonna do anything stupid if it means protecting me. Promise that you won't risk yourself just to save me from Michael, or to stop Lucifer."

When I heard nothing but silence after that I already knew what he was gonna say, so it wasn't at all surprising when he finally said it out loud.

"I won't promise that, Mary. I refuse."

I sighed and practically tore a hole in the blanket. "Why?"

"Because it's not something I'm willing to do."

"That tells me nothing."

His arms tightened around me. "Mary let me explain something to you. As you know, angels weren't created to feel as normal humans do. And it's pretty much impossible for them to do so. Yes, it has happened but it's so rare there's only one other sibling I know of that actually has experienced it, and she cut out her own grace and fell-" He paused and I felt my brows press together. I was pretty sure I knew who he was talking about from Dad's stories when I was a kid. "Other than Anna, I'm the only one I've ever heard of that's felt real emotions- So do you really think that I would sit back and do nothing when the woman responsible for making me feel so strongly could be killed?"

I rolled over to face him. "It can't only be me. You started feeling things long before I ever came around."

"True," He nodded. "But this is different."

Okay, maybe it would've been better if everyone, including Dad, didn't like me so much. Maybe then they wouldn't be so willing to jump in front of a threat for me. That's not the reason why I came back here. I didn't come here so they could risk their asses for me- It was supposed to be the other way around. Don't get me wrong, of course I was happy that Cas actually felt something for me, I was ecstatic really- But if it meant he was ready to die just to watch out for my ass I wasn't ready to accept that. Maybe I shoulda come back as a raging bitch just to make sure they couldn't stand me.

Hell, I knew even that wouldn't have worked. Even if they did hate my guts Dad would still lay his ass on the line to protect it- It was just in his nature. I'm sure that every person he saved throughout the years he didn't like, he had to have majorly _disliked _some of them- That was also in his nature. But because saving people was the right thing to do, he would've gotten over that.

No I wasn't pissed about any of that, I could hardly criticize them for wanting to protect me when I wanted to do the same with them. But that didn't mean I liked it at all. All I knew was that things had definitely changed from the first time this happened. Dad's version of this story was a complete contrast to this one. There was no talk of horsemen rings or Sam saying yes- We had the Michael sword which meant we had an _actual _way of _killing _the devil. Not just locking him away again, but being rid of him entirely. Not to mention Bobby wasn't stabbed and paralyzed this time around, Meg was dead, and we were living in the bunker years earlier then it originally happened. Apparently altering the past _was _possible, Cas must've been wrong because this sure as hell was different.

I must've fallen asleep as my mind was wandering, because I was jolted awake by a light tapping on my door and it slowly creaking open.

And I almost peed the bed as I grabbed the blankets and flung them over Cas' head in attempts to hiding him when Sam peaked in.

"Hey Mary, sorry if I woke you up but I was wondering-" He stopped, then stood up straight staring at the end of my bed and the extra pair of feet that poked out from under the blankets. "Uh... Wow, I... Sorry-" He was biting back laughter. "I thought you were alone in here."

I put my hands over my face and grumbled. "Welp, there ya go."

"Hello, Sam." Cas said awkwardly from under the blanket.

"Holy crap," Sam snorted. "I thought you were bullshitting us when you said you and Cas were..."

"Did you need something?" I interrupted.

"Uh," He chuckled but forced it away. "Yeah, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second, but... I'll come back in ten minutes or so."

When he left, Cas came out from under the blanket and stared at the closed door. I took one good look at his panic and bed messed hair and burst out laughing. Seeing is that I wasn't shitting a brick in fear he eased up some.

"That was unexpected." He said, sitting up. "Do you think he'll tell Dean?"

"No," I hid my face in my hands and continued to laugh. "Sam's not like that. Good job at not hearing him coming."

"I didn't think he would actually open the door."

"Yeah, I guess I forgot to lock it last night." I kicked the blankets away. "Okay, guess we should get dressed then."

I was already partially dressed anyways since I had to go and grab the first aid kit the night before after Cas' arm started bleeding again. So it didn't take me long to be up and ready. A minute later so was Cas and Sam yet again knocked on the door- This time he had the sense to not come in without permission.

"Yeah." I called out and he peaked inside.

"Just making sure you're decent this time." He said, then nodded to Cas. "So, uh... How long's this been going on?"

After a sloppy attempt at making the bed I shrugged. "You really wanna know the answer to that?"

"No, guess not." He yet again looked to Cas. "Hey can you give us a minute?"

Cas nodded and headed for the door and I passed him a wink before he left.

"So what's up?" I asked, and tried to smooth out the blankets.

"Uh, well- It's kind of awkward." He started.

"More awkward then what just happened?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I guess I wanted to ask if maybe Dean ever said anything to you in the future about Lucifer, and... Him coming to me in dreams?"

I froze where I stood and dropped the corner of my blanket. "Shit, Sam... How long has that been going on?"

"So is that a yes?"

"Well yeah, he might've mentioned that but I didn't know it was happening again. What the fuck, dude- Why didn't you say anything?"

He sighed and was gonna sit on the bed, but then froze and scooted over to a small chair in the corner.

"I didn't know how to bring it up I guess," He answered. "It would be kinda hard to mention that around Dean, he'd probably freak out and..."

"What?" I interrupted. "Think that you were all for Lucifer dream rushing you?"

"Yeah, maybe-" He brushed his hair from his eyes. "And I guess there was a part of me that was hoping it was just a fucked up dream and not actually Lucifer."

I sat down too and rubbed my head. "Okay, well- What does he say to you, or do I even need to ask?"

"Probably not. But, he keeps trying to get me to say yes, obviously- And keeps saying he can't find me and that the vessel he has now is too weak, all that crap."

"And what do you say to him?"

His forehead crinkled. "That he can go to hell, that there's no way I'd ever say yes to him and he's just wasting his breath. But from what I can tell so far he doesn't seem to suspect anything. I mean, he doesn't know that we're up to anything and he's never mentioned you either. So, I'm wondering if maybe he doesn't know about you coming back to this time. If that's true then we'd have a slight advantage, right?"

"Yeah, maybe-" I nodded. "Of course there's really no way of knowing what he knows. He could be on to everything we've been doin and we'd be completely clueless."

"I thought that too, but if that's the case then you'd think he'd try to avoid me. That he wouldn't bother coming to me in dreams and get me to say yes, right?"

The look in his eyes was making me panic, and I knew why. He was hoping that I could tell him that this never happened before, that it wasn't some twisted sign that he was gonna end up saying yes in the future.

"He's just trying to break you, Sam." I replied. "He thinks he can sweet talk you or con you maybe, I don't know. All you gotta do is just keep fighting him off, don't listen to anything he says and believe that we're gonna fix this ourselves. You won't have to say yes to him. It's not gonna come down to that."

His eyes fell to the floor. "I just keep thinking about what Cas said. How all roads lead to the same destination and all that bullshit."

"Exactly-" I snapped back. "Bullshit. Total bullshit. Just because Cas is an angel don't mean he can't get things wrong every once in a while. If you don't want to say yes, Sam- Then you don't have to. Just remember what all goes wrong if you do, keep that thought in your head at all times. You're strong enough to resist him, I know you are."

Maybe I shoulda taken my own advice with that one- Because I seriously was beginning to question whether or not I was strong enough to resist Michael. If I was put in the situation of either my Dad saying yes, or me, I hated that I'd actually go and say yes to the asshole just so Dad wouldn't have to. Not that I believed Dad would exactly, if he didn't do it before then I really didn't think he'd do it again- But if things were changing as much as I thought they were then I didn't have anyway of knowing that for sure. Who knows, maybe since things had changed this much Dad _could_ end up saying yes and dammit, that thought scared the ever loving shit out of me.

"Thank, Mary-" Sam smiled. "It's nice to hear that, actually. I think it's the first time someone's ever said something like that to me. Ever since Jessica died and my premonitions started, and then Ruby and the demon blood- I think it's safe to say that Dean was starting to think I was weak or something. Or that I was a," He cleared his throat. "A monster."

"He doesn't think that, Sammy. It's just that you're his little brother, and he puts all this responsibility on himself so if something happens to go wrong, well-"

"Yeah," He nodded. "He blames himself. I get that. It's always been that way." He stood now and started for the door. "Well, thanks. And, uh... Let's keep this talk between you and me, okay?"

"Yeah I know, don't worry about it."

"And since we're both kinda in the same situation. Let's just say we'll watch each others backs. I'll keep you from saying yes to Michael, and you do the same with me."

The faint smile I had faded. "I never said I was gonna-"

"I know," He interrupted. "But if you're as much like Dean as I _know _you are, then I know what's going through your mind. So, I'm not gonna let you say yes to Michael, and no matter what I'm gonna have your back, okay?"

I tried to smile again but it was so forced it would've been obvious it was fake. I guess Sam didn't feel like commenting on it because he left my room seconds later.

Unfortunately he wouldn't have been able to stop me if my mind was set on something. And even though I was ashamed of it, it pretty much was set this time.


	34. Chapter 34

Something felt... _Wrong_. Really incredibly wrong, and I couldn't figure out why or what it was. All I knew was that something felt like it was missing. Like I'd fallen asleep, woke up the next morning and poof, something was gone. I was in the bunker, check, I was still in the past with Dad, Sammy and Cas, check. Seriously, what the flying crap was missing? It was when I saw Bobby in the bunker did I realize that I had absolutely no friggin clue why he was there, what we'd been doing the last few days and why everyone was whispering around me.

I heard Dad say something about bullets, which really shouldn't have been all that secretive- But whenever I'd come into a room he'd clam up and change the subject. They were trying to act normal without _seeming _like they were trying to act normal, which only made me all the more curious as to why they were acting so weird. Cas especially, who couldn't lie to save his life, sucked ass at it and seemed guilty. Normally I'd try to question him about it, since he was the one that could be tricked into talking- But something kept telling me to let it go- Seriously, don't push it this time and just drop it... Walk away. Which was a hell of a lot harder than one might think. I didn't like knowing that something was being held from me, and even though I really _really _wanted to know what it was- I just couldn't force out the questions that needed to be asked.

So I sat there at the kitchen table with my eyes narrowed, watching Dad, Sammy and Bobby eating their dinner while Cas sat quietly and observed. I'd barely touched my own food, and kept shifting my attention to each man trying to understand what was going on. No one had mentioned anything that had to do with Michael or Lucifer in days- No one even thought to talk about what we could do to stop the apocalypse. Oh yeah, something weird was going on around here.

"You gonna eat or what?" Dad asked, elbowing me lightly. "It can't be that you don't like it since you cooked it."

I glared at him suspiciously and slowly shoved a bite into my mouth, chewing just as slowly and didn't take my eyes off him.

"What's with you?" Sam chuckled. "You're being weird."

"_I'm _being weird?" I snapped back. "Yeah, okay. If you wanna play _that _game."

Dad was taken aback, or at least faked it just as everyone was faking a lot of shit lately.

"Uh, okay-" Dad shrugged, stuffing another bite of lasagna in his mouth. "Whatever you say, kid."

They went back to eating and acting like nothing was out of the ordinary and I held my arms up.

"Seriously?" I said. "No one is gonna even mention Lucifer, or Michael- Or the apocalypse? That we've been sitting here in the bunker for like a week doing nothing but lazing on our asses while the devil is running around free?"

Cas was sitting on the opposite side of me and I could see from the corner of my eye that he went stiff.

"We're still looking into things," Dad replied with a full mouth. "Don't stress out about it. It's gonna take time."

It's gonna take time? Was he serious right now?

Let it go, my mind kept saying, just friggin let it go already and drop the fucking subject. So, that's what I did, somehow by a miracle. I didn't mention it again. That didn't mean I wasn't curious anymore, hell no I definitely was.

"So I gotta make a run into town," Dad said after pushing his plate away. "Mary, wanna ride along?"

"Sure," I shrugged. "Not like I got anything else to do."

As we were leaving the kitchen I noticed Dad give a distinct nod in Cas and Sam's direction, as if I wouldn't notice. And, obviously that was some sort of signal for something, and if my mind wasn't screaming at me to shut the fuck up about everything then I woulda called him out on it. But, I didn't. I kept my cake hole shut as we left the bunker, jumped in the Impala and took off towards town.

"So where we goin?" I asked, making myself comfortable in the front seat.

"To grab some supplies, we're running low on food." He answered.

"No we're not," I scowled. "I'm the one that does all the cooking, don't you think I'd be the one that'd notice we were running outa food. Really, Dad- What the fuck's going on?"

He flinched slightly and tapped his hands on the steering wheel. "Nothin, just thought we'd take a drive."

"Why?"

"Uh, do I need a reason?"

I gaped at him with my mouth hanging open. "Seeing is that the _only _times you ever asked me to go on a drive with you was because I was in trouble and you wanted to yell at me, yeah- You need a reason."

"Okay," He shrugged. "Maybe you're in trouble."

"Right," I snorted. "I'm in trouble. I'm twenty two years old and you wanna yell at me for what exactly?"

He arched his brows and looked at me. "You tell me."

Whoa okay, flashback to the future. I suddenly felt like going over everything I'd done the last couple days trying to figure out what I did to piss Dad off- Suddenly realizing that I hadn't done anything, I wasn't ten years old anymore, and Dad was just trying to distract me.

"You're being a weirdo. I didn't do anything." I finally replied.

"Really? That's not what I heard."

The frick... "Okay, so if you're really gonna go with this then _you _tell me what I supposedly did- And while you're blabbering about that I'll sit here and try to figure out why you're trying to make me think I did something, when I clearly _didn't _do something, and you're trying to make me think I did because _you're _the one that actually did something."

His eyes shifted back and forth and I'd obviously confused him. "_Okayyy_. Chill out, you're gonna have an aneurysm."

"I'm completely chilled. You're the one that's being a weirdo."

He rolled his eyes and went silent and I only stared at him for the rest of the drive until we pulled to a stop in front of the grocery store.

"Beer run," He said. "You coming in?"

"Yep, I'm not letting you outa my site as long as you're acting like this."

"Whatever, freak." He gave me a cheeky grin and climbed out.

I followed after him and as he started for the door we passed a street preacher who was handing out brochures from a table. He had a big cardboard sign painted with bright red letters, which said, "God loves his Children."

"Excuse me Miss, Sir-" He said and Dad glared at him. "But have you ever wondered if God is out there? If he hears your prayers?"

Before Dad could bark out something sarcastic I grabbed his jacket sleeve and gave it a tug, pulling him past and inside the store. It was kinda hard not to notice how the dude watched me until I was out of site. Yeah not weird at all.

Dad led the way through the aisles and grabbed his favorite beer and finished off with a few things to snack on, muttering something about maybe catching a movie. Which of course surprised me. I mean, if he was trying to distract me from whatever they were hiding from me, then he should've known that mentioning we go to a movie would've only made me that much more suspicious.

But I shook it off, just as I was for some odd reason, shaking _everything _off lately. And after we paid and started back for the car the religion guy was gone from his table.

"So listen," Dad said before we got back in the car. "I know you're wondering what's going on, and normally I'd flat out tell you- But this time it's something we gotta keep under wraps for right now, okay?"

I froze with my hand on the door handle. "Keep under wraps? Even from me?"

"It's nothing personal, kid-" He shrugged. "It's just something that we wanna make sure is a good thing before we bring it all out in the open."

"Okay, and just for arguments sake- Who else doesn't know about this super secret thing, huh?"

"Uh..." He scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "Well, just you."

"Right, just me. So, remind me again why I shouldn't take it personally?"

He opened his door. "Cause it's not anything against you. Let's just say it's for your protection and leave it at that."

I opened the backseat door and threw in the groceries. "Fine, but just so you know I'm not a little kid anymore and I think I can handle whatever it is-" I slammed the door closed and turned to open my own when, poof, I wasn't standing in the parking lot anymore but was yet again back in that fancy room. "Oh shit..."

A quick turn showed that Dad wasn't there with me, I was alone... But it didn't last long when Zachariah appeared in front of me.

"Oh shit..." I repeated, my heart rate skyrocketed and I suddenly felt light headed.

No, no no. Jesus, what the fuck was I gonna do now? It was completely fucking obvious why I was back in this damn place, and I wasn't at all prepared for it!

"Mary," Zachariah smiled. "It's time."

I couldn't croak out anything for what felt like minutes on end- I could only stand there trying not to pass out. When I finally did speak, my voice was quivering.

"T-Time for what?" Not that I didn't already know.

"Don't ask silly questions," He replied. "You know very well what's going on. It's time for you to make good on the end of our deal." He smacked his hands together and moved forward. "I have to say I'm excited. Oh, sure- There were a few kinks here and there, a few bumpy spots in the road but overall-" He winked at me. "Smooth sailing."

"B-But... Lucifer's..."

"Oh I know, you're wondering about Sam. He hasn't said yes yet. But I have good news. He doesn't have to."

"What do you mean he doesn't have to?"

"We've been going over everything we learned from your memories- And my superiors decided it was just too risky to let Sam say yes. Because, you see, in _your_ version Sam said yes and was able to regain control of his own mind and jump back in the cage. We can't let that happen. The serpent must be destroyed, not locked away again. That's not how the prophecy's supposed to go." When he noticed my expression he went on. "A little bird told us that the horsemen were being taken out one by one, and their rings were being collected, which as we've also learned is what actually opens Lucifer's cage, so... We put two and two together and figured that was probably what you're trying to do this time around too."

But he was wrong... We _weren't _taking out the horsemen. Crowley was supposed to be dealing with Pestilence, but as far as the other three we didn't think he'd actually risk going after them. Were we wrong though? Did Crowley suddenly decide that he wasn't only gonna take out Pestilence but all four horsemen? If he was then he somehow must've found out that the rings opened Lucifer's cage- Either that or he wanted their rings for some other twisted reason.

"So, here's what's going to happen," Zach went on and took a seat. "_You're _going to say yes to Michael. And once Michael has taken his vessel, he's going to fight Lucifer on the chosen field, and it should be a relatively easy battle. As you stated before Lucifer's weak right now because the vessel he's currently possessing is wearing thin."

"B-but if I do, half of the planet..."

He waved his hand at me and cut me off. "Minor details, Mary. Remember our deal. You do what we want without putting up a fight, and everyone you care about makes it out alive."

I was seriously going to throw up, I could feel the chunks rising in my throat and my eyes watering.

"_Don't_," He continued. "Try to cross me. I warned you what would happen if you did. We have your Father as well- Locked away in his own special room. You refuse to do what you promised and you can guarantee the remainder of his life will be a living hell." He snickered. "Actually, he's been to hell and knows what that's like so I guess we'll have to get more creative than that."

Oh my god... Now I couldn't breathe, I had to sit down and rest my elbows on my knees just to keep from passing out.

How fucking stupid was I to think I could dick over these assholes! Of course I couldn't. They knew how to apply the right pressure and where, they knew what my weakness was and fuck it all- Of course they'd use Dad to get what they wanted.

I kept telling myself not to say yes, that Dad wouldn't want me to. He'd say it was stupid to put his life over millions of people- That even if they killed him it didn't matter, it was wrong to give in and crack.

"I wanna talk to my Dad." I said, in tears now. "Before I agree to anything, I wanna talk to my Dad."

If I could just hear his voice, if I could hear him tell me flat out not to do it, then maybe I could resist it. Because if I just sat there with the thought of my Father being tortured and killed then there wasn't a chance I could've said no.

"Fine," Zach replied. "Call him. Your phone's in working order for two minutes. Make the most of it."

I quickly yanked it from my pocket and with shaking hands dialed Dad's number. It rang once before he picked up.

"Mary? Are you okay?" He asked, and judging by his tone I could tell Zach wasn't lying- They had him locked somewhere too.

"No, I'm n-not okay, Dad... They want me to do it." I replied.

"Jesus," He muttered. "You know better than that, Mary. Don't you dare let them get to you."

I choked back a sob. "I-if I don't, they said they'll-"

"It don't matter what they said they'll do, Mary. Whatever it is, it's not worth all of the millions of people that'll die if you say yes- And you know it."

"But... They're gonna come after you!"

I heard him cuss lightly under his breath. "Okay, listen to me. I know what you're thinking, but it don't matter. Doing this just to spare me is wrong- If they wanna come after me, then let em. It's not gonna make their battle happen any sooner and they'll still be just as screwed."

"And you'll be dead." I sobbed.

"If that's what happens, then that's the way it's gotta be, Mary."

I glanced upwards to see Zach tapping at his watch sarcastically.

"Dad, I don't..."

"Mary," His tone softened. "Look, you know I'm not the kinda guy that can..." He stopped and sighed. "Fuck it, listen to me. I know you think that you coming back here fucked things up, that I might've been pissed about it, or that I hate you or something. But I don't. How could I? You're my daughter and probably the only good thing that came from me being here. You're a good kid and I'm proud of you, you hear me? This is probably the first time I've ever said this out loud, but... I love you, okay?" By now I could barely hear him through my sobs. "If you know me as much as you say you do then you know that's not somethin I throw out there often, or at all. So what does that tell you?"

I wiped my eyes on my t-shirt. "That you mean it."

Dad never said that to anyone other than me in the future. Never... Even though I knew he loved his brother, he never outright said those words. For some reason that just wasn't something he could spit out. But he always did with me. I guess because I was his daughter, somehow that made a difference.

"Right," He sighed. "Now calm down, and do what you gotta do."

I nodded and tried to respond when Zachariah snatched my phone away and ended the call.

"Okay, that's enough." He said. "You got what you wanted."

"Fuck off, Zachariah." I snapped back. "You're not getting your yes."

He sighed and didn't look surprised. "I figured you might say that and really- I didn't want it to come down to this but I guess you've left us no choice."

I was visibly shaking by now, but not for my own welfare but for what they were surely gonna do to Dad now.

"I'm not saying yes." I repeated, even though it killed me to spit that out.

"You don't have to," He nodded. "It would've been nice if we at least could've played by the rules this time and got the yes we were wanting, at least we wouldn't have had to completely stray off the prophecy's path, but... You've left us no choice, as I said. You see, what's interesting about you Mary is that _technically_, you're not supposed to exist in this time, which means- Michael doesn't need your permission. So, he's going to take you whether you give us the yes or not."

Everything suddenly turned cold and clammy. "That's crap, he can't just jump me without my consent!"

"Yes actually, he can. Like I said, you don't even exist here in this time. So if you're not supposed to be here, if you don't exist in the here and now, him taking you and killing you isn't going to cause any harm, and technically he's not breaking the rules."

"That's bullshit!" I flew to my feet. "So what if I'm not supposed to be here, I'm still a human being!"

"I'm through talking about this, so I'll ask one last time- Are you going to say yes and spare yourself the unpleasant experience of Michael taking you by force, or well... Are you going to be stubborn?"

I cinched my mouth shut and didn't budge, then he nodded.

"Alright, fine. Have it your way."

Seconds later the room started violently shaking before filling with a bright white light. The last thing I remember is hearing a high pitched hissing before the overwhelming feeling of being invaded overtook me. Then all fell silent.

* * *

It was the tenth time that Dean tried calling Mary back, only to receive voice mail. He tried calling Sam and Bobby but they wouldn't go through. It had been over an hour that he'd been locked in this room, and hadn't heard from anyone since talking to Mary.

He was starting to panic, seeing is that he wasn't having the crap beaten out of him it was safe to assume that Mary must've said yes to Michael. As much as he wanted to get angry at her over that, he couldn't- Because there was no telling what he might have done had he been in the same situation. He'd like to believe that he could have the sense to not agree to anything they demanded, but if it was Mary or Sam they were threatening- He couldn't guarantee he would actually have that strength.

Now what needed to be done was getting to Lucifer first and killing him, before Michael could step up and start the fight. If they could kill Lucifer, Michael wouldn't have any reason to be here anymore- Which meant he wouldn't have a use for Mary. Dean could only hope though that the asshole would have the decency to leave Mary alive once he was through possessing her.

He was trying to keep his mind off of that very thing. Knowing that his daughter was probably long gone and replaced with some psycho angel with a god complex.

After trying his phone for the millionth time Zachariah finally poofed into the room.

"Where is she you son of a bitch?" Dean snapped before Zach could speak.

"Gone," He answered, looking very pleased with himself. "Michael is setting out to finish this once and for all."

And suddenly Dean couldn't pretend anymore that Mary was okay. He couldn't deny that she was gone, at least for the moment.

"You're a cold hearted bastard you know that?" Dean said, cringing. "She's just a kid, she doesn't deserve any of this."

"It was her choice to come back here, Dean. So whatever comes from that is really her own fault."

"Is it?" He stepped closer. "What'd you do to get her to say yes anyways? More death threats on me? Maybe you said you'd kill Cas, or Sammy?"

"Actually," Zachariah sighed. "She was easily motivated just by the thought of you. It's a little disturbing really, how obsessed your daughter is with you. Just as disturbing as your dependence on your brother."

Dean bit back curses yet again inching closer. "So what now, huh? What happens now?"

"Michael will kill Lucifer, and the end can finally begin. I'm thankful that the show's happening so soon since according to Mary's memories when this happened the first time, an entire year passed that you and your brother continued to dodge us. We're way ahead of schedule this time."

Dean nodded, finally stopping in front of Zachariah.

"Bet you never counted on one thing though." He said.

"What's that?" Zach smiled.

"That you wouldn't live to see the end of it." Dean replied, then suddenly pulled an angel blade from his jacket and jammed the end straight through Zachariah's heart.

It was so quick he didn't even have the chance to move before he erupted in a blinding white light that Dean refused to look away from. With a screech and another burst of light Dean was shoved backwards from the impact, and within seconds it was over. For a moment he could only stand there staring at the scorched black remnants of wings outstretched across the floor and table.

"That was for Mary." He said, then turned and darted for the door.

Since Zachariah was dead it opened with little effort, and he ran outside and into the empty muffler factory the fancy room was stationed in.

He yanked out his phone and dialed Sam's number and waited.

"Dean?" Sam answered. "Where the hell are you?"

"They got her, Sammy." Dean replied. "Michael got Mary."

He heard Sam's breath catch in his throat.

"Shit..." He forced out. "Okay, just stay calm and..."

"Tell Cas that I'm back at that fucking room," Dean interrupted. "Tell him to come get me dammit, cause we're ending this shit now!"

He hung up without saying anything else, and seconds later Cas had zapped himself to the factory and found Dean sitting on the dirty floor with his head in his hands.

Cas didn't speak because there weren't any words that could be said right then.

"She didn't even have a chance, Cas," Dean said. "They just took us. We didn't even expect it."

Cas couldn't seem to force words out, which he knew he should have. At least attempt to comfort Dean somehow, but whatever he could've said was successfully jammed in his throat.

Dean pulled himself to his feet and Cas finally nodded.

"She wouldn't have said yes, Dean. She would have known better than that."

"Whether she said yes the results are still the same, man. Michael's got her. So take me back so we can figure out what the fuck were gonna do now."

Cas heaved out a solemn sigh before laying his hand on Deans shoulder and zapping him back to the bunker door. Dean didn't hesitate to burst back inside and found Sam and Bobby in the library. Without speaking he moved to a bookshelf off to the right where an old cigar box sat on the top shelf. After standing on a chair and grabbing it he moved back to the table and slammed it down.

He opened it and pulled out the bullets they'd forged out of the Michael sword and started counting them. They had ten in total, which was more than he figured they'd end up with.

"Plans, _now_." He barked. "Someone come up with fucking something!"

Sam kept his eyes on the table and didn't speak, because they hadn't come up with anything since the Michael sword was melted down. Having the weapon was one thing, but actually having a successful way of using it was another.

"Someone say something," Dean went on. "Anything, even if it's reckless."

Cas moved over to beside him and took a bullet from his hand.

"We would need to lure Lucifer out in the open," He said. "And- the only way to do that..."

He trailed off and moved his eyes to Sam.

"Me," Sam nodded. "The only way for that to work is if he's coming after me."

"If Lucifer comes to retrieve Sam then there's a very strong possibility that Michael would follow." Cas finished.

Dean's jaw clenched. "That's too risky though- Just letting Lucifer walk straight up to us."

"My choice to make, Dean-" Sam argued. "If I let him believe that I'm willing to say yes we can distract him long enough to get a shot off. It's my decision to make and I wanna do it. If it means getting Mary back then what other options do we have?" Dean fell silent. "There isn't any and you know it. So... Let's figure out how we're gonna do this, okay?"

It was gonna all come down to who the quicker draw was, everyone knew that. Only it was Lucifer they were going to be having a showdown with, which they all knew as well, was going to be next to impossible.


	35. Chapter 35

"So let's go over it again," Dean said as he drove. "One more time."

Sam nodded and cleared his throat. "We get to the location, Cas squeegees the marks off my ribs which should send Lucifer running straight for me."

"We don't give him any opportunities to strike," Cas added. "We shoot first and ask questions later."

"And we hope the jackass don't explode us before we can get a shot off." Bobby finished.

Sam sighed and shook his head. "I don't think he's gonna fall for this, Dean. He's gonna know that something's up."

"Stick to the plan, Sammy." Dean replied. "We gotta at least convince him that you're there to say yes long enough to friggin shoot him." He turned and glared at him. "But no matter what happens, even if he kills us all, don't you dare back down and actually say yes."

"I know," He nodded. "Believe me I know. It's bad enough that Michael's got Mary."

Overall the plan was full of flaws, which they were well aware of. But considering they didn't have much time and there was no other way of going about this- It was the only thing they could come up with on the spur of the moment that didn't involve Sam actually saying yes.

"So," Dean said. "Is everything still the same on angel radio?"

Cas nodded from the backseat. "From what I've heard, Michael is having difficulty locating Lucifer. Apparently Lucifer's gone into hiding since the vessel he has now is so weak, he must know he wouldn't stand a chance of surviving the battle."

"I still don't get how you're back in tune with angel radio to begin with." Sam stated. "I thought you were cut off from heaven?"

"I am, but this isn't coming from heaven. There are many of Michael's followers stationed here on earth in attempts to luring Lucifer out. So, when they speak here I can hear it."

Everyone noticed Deans stiff posture in the drivers seat, and truthfully they were just waiting for him to explode. He'd been unusually quiet since Mary was taken over which was more alarming than if he was ranting or raving.

"Have you heard Michael?" He asked, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. "Have you heard that bastard talkin at all?"

Cas shook his head. "No, not directly. I've only heard his orders being relayed through his soldiers."

They fell silent now, and eventually Bobby passed out in the backseat. They left the bunker just after midnight after a quick call to Chuck, and they found out that the final battle was supposed to go down in an old cemetery just outside Lawrence. It was only a three hour drive, but they wanted to get there before dawn so they could assess the area and get a feel for the landscape.

"Hey, Dean-" Sam said quietly. "There's something I wanna talk to you about."

"What?" He barked back.

"This is pretty much a long shot, but... Just in case this actually goes the way we want- I want you to promise me something."

Dean glanced to the rear view mirror and at Cas in the backseat, it didn't seem as though he was listening to the conversation but more then likely he was.

"Okay, what?" He replied.

"I'm thinking about Mary, you know, coming back here and going through all this crap for us. It's not fair to her, and I think you know that." Sam started.

"Fuck yeah I know that. If I could stop it I would."

Sam looked at him with his brows pushed together. "Dean, there _is _a way you can stop it. To stop all of it."

"How?" Dean returned the look.

"By getting out. Leave the life behind, stop hunting. If all of this goes the way we want then take Mary and get the fuck out. You could go look up Lisa and Ben, or you could just stay at the bunker- But one way or the other you need to get her out of this."

Yet again Dean looked to Cas in the backseat, only now his eyes were fixed on Sam.

"I was thinking about that, actually-" Dean sighed. "But if I did, what would you be doing?"

"Me?" Sam shrugged. "If you leave, I leave. That's the way it goes. Family sticks together, right? But you shouldn't worry about what I'd be doing. Mary's your daughter, she should be your main concern." He smiled faintly. "You can admit it you know... That Mary's on the top of your list. It's what's right anyways. I wouldn't expect anything else. Of course I'd expect for your daughter to outrank me."

Dean shook his head, letting out a sad sigh. "Still feels weird, you know? I still think of you as my pain in the ass little brother that I gotta watch out for."

"I know, but I'm not a kid anymore. Mary, on the other hand is _your _kid, and she's been through enough crap in my opinion. Since she's stuck here and can't go back, it's your job to make sure she's okay."

"I know that."

"So," He prodded him with his eyes. "What're you gonna do about it?"

Dean moved his attention to his brother long enough to give a weak smile. "Guess we go civilian, right?"

Sam chuckled. "Yeah... Guess so."

"Only, we still gotta find a way of getting Mary out of her deal. So, whatever comes with that we can't back down from." Dean finished, and for the third time looked to Cas. "So, you're still gonna help out with that, right? Even if we leave the life, are you sticking around?"

Cas locked his eyes on Dean's reflection. "Of course I'm going to help. I'm not going anywhere."

With another faint smile, Dean nodded. "Good."

It was a nice enough thought anyways, thinking they could actually leave and maybe take a break. Of course Dean figured it was stupid to go and get his hopes up about it. They had no idea what was gonna happen with this show down with Lucifer. By the time morning came they very well might all be dead.

* * *

The cemetery was pretty much baron, at least in the form that there wasn't any place to take cover should the time call for it. Not that they could be protected from the devil by ducking behind some random object, but it would still settle their minds some of they at least had the option.

Dean had circled the area a good twenty times, while everyone else readied their weapons. They had holy oil molotovs, in case they needed them, and of course the most important- The bullets from the Michael sword. Sam and Dean had split them evenly between the two of them. Five for each, but they figured if anyone would actually be able to fire a shot- It would be Sam.

A heavy cloud was pressing down on all of their shoulders, the feeling of impending doom was prominent. This wasn't going to work, they each knew that- No matter how many times they tried to voice it out loud that it would. Remaining optimistic just wasn't in the cards anymore, not with a situation like this. It was almost like they were watching the scene unfold from the sidelines, and weren't actually participating in it- It was so unusual. Nothing felt real, it was like one big show out of some horror flick that under normal circumstances, Dean would've loved. Not this time though.

Cas had removed the sigils from Sam's ribs nearly a half hour ago and there was still no sign of Lucifer. Dawn and come and gone, it was now well into the morning hours and the sun was peaking over the treetops. Before removing the markings though Cas had made one giant circle out of the remainder of the holy oil, that they hoped Lucifer would be stupid enough to step into. Once they lit it, they would all be trapped inside. It was bound to be a blood fest after that.

"What's taking so damn long?" Dean asked.

"Good question," Sam sighed, leaning on the hood of the Impala. "You'd think he would've showed by now."

They all knew better than to mention the bullets now that Sam's sigils were gone. Lucifer could hear everything they said now, and was probably listening.

It would've been obvious they were leading him into some kind of trap, and if Lucifer really didn't know about the Michael sword then his next best guess would be the horsemens rings. Which meant, he was probably conjuring up something of his own before showing. If he was even going to do it at all. Basically they had no idea if the asshole would even come- With knowing Michael was out there searching for him, and he was at a disadvantage, it would've been risky.

Cas took a small turn, keeping his eyes on the sky. "I haven't heard anything since I removed Sam's sigils. Everything's gone silent."

"And?" Dean asked, shielding his eyes from the sun. "You think that's a bad sign?"

"I honestly have no idea. It very well might mean that Michael is aware of the situation and is biding his time until Lucifer shows."

So they went back to waiting, and another hour passed that was completely silent and still. It was getting to the point that Dean was actually wanting Sam to pray to the guy to get him to show, but as it turns out it wasn't necessary.

Cas spotted him first, his eyes going wide at a figure that stood on the opposite side of the cemetery. Even at the distance between them he could see the vessel Lucifer was wearing was practically falling apart at the seams. It was running thin along his cheekbones and forehead, the skin cracked and melted. Despite that, he was as sturdy as a brick wall in a windstorm.

Whoever the man was he was possessing was obviously dead now, the soul had left the body and all that was left behind was Lucifer.

Once Sam and Dean noticed Cas' stance they spotted him as well. Dean wasn't sure who he was looking at until he noticed Sam's jaw clench and the panic in his eyes. The night before his brother had finally told him about the dreams he'd been having, and the frequent visits Lucifer made in them. Going by the description of a little over than average height man, with dirty blonde hair, it was safe to assume that he'd finally arrived.

They didn't move though, they wanted Lucifer to be the one to do that- Hoping he would walk himself straight into the holy oil circle. And he did start moving, he walked towards them with a gait that made Sam, Dean and Bobby want to piss their pants. His eyes deadpanned on Sammy, his expression was cold and blank- Until he stopped just outside the ring of holy oil, dropping his eyes only slightly and then smirking.

"Did you really think I would fall for that?" He asked, and despite the harshness to his eyes, his voice really did sound amused.

"It was worth a shot." Sam replied, feeling his fingers nervously twitching at his side.

Lucifer moved his attention from Sam, to Dean and eventually Cas- Having no interest in Bobby it seemed.

"Castiel, right?" He asked. "I've heard a lot about you. Seems you and me have a few things in common."

Cas' eyes squinted, but he knew better than to anger him somehow. "I fail to see the similarities."

"Really?" He nodded. "You rebelled and were cast out, just as I was... You and I are in the same boat, brother." Before he could respond he let out a sigh. "So, we're here now, you've made yourself visible to me, Sam. Why?"

"I wanna make a deal," Sam replied. "In exchange for me saying yes."

Naturally Lucifer looked skeptical. "A deal, hm? That's interesting. I guess it wouldn't hurt to hear your demands, who knows- It might be entertaining."

Dean cleared his throat and moved forward. "We're in a no win situation here. We know that now, and Michael took someone important to us."

"Yeah, I heard," Lucifer sighed. "Your daughter, right?"

"We wanna be sure that if you get what you want, that she survives this. After Michael's gone, you have to promise that she'll be okay. That we'll all survive this, and after everything's over and done with, you'll leave them alone." Sam added. "Otherwise you can't have me."

Lucifer looked gobsmacked. "Obviously I'm confused, Sam. Under normal circumstances I'd think you were trying to trick me somehow, but... Last I heard only three of the rings had been confiscated. Death's tethered to me, so naturally I wouldn't let him give _his_ up. That means you can't have the plan of locking me back in my cage, so really- What's going on?"

Sam held his arms out. "It's what I said. And like Dean said, we're in a no win situation, so we're just trying to find a way out of this that doesn't end up with everyone I care about _dead_."

Still, Lucifer didn't know what to do. They figured that every instinct he had was on red alert by now, and seeing is that he wasn't nuking them- He obviously had no idea about the Michael sword.

The situation shifted when they heard a second flapping of wings, and at turning, Dean felt himself go cold at seeing Mary. Only, it wasn't Mary anymore, he knew that now.

The expression on her face was blank, and she didn't bother looking at anyone other than Lucifer. Like he had, Michael apparently knew better than to walk past the line of holy oil.

"Michael," Lucifer said. "It's been a long time."

"Too long, little brother." He replied. "Looks as though the time's come."

Lucifer sighed, and even though they were both intent on killing each other, his expression was sullen.

"I know why you're here," He nodded. "And all I ask is that you at least give me the chance I deserve. Let us end this the way it was written. How fair is it that you ambush me when, clearly, I'm at a disadvantage?"

Mary's head tilted, and her look was just as cold. "I'm sorry but I can't do that. Why would I let you take Sam Winchester? This has gone on long enough, Lucifer- And I'm going to do what I'm ordered. As much as I don't like it, it has to be done."

Everyone inside the circle had gone stiff and silent- Watching the interaction in pure terror. Dean glanced to Sam long enough to see that his hands had went into his jacket pockets, where his pistol was hidden.

"Mary," Dean said, taking a step forward. "If you can hear me in there-"

"She can't hear you," Michael cut him off. "Don't bother, Dean. You're not a part of this story, you haven't been since the moment she came back here. All of you should do yourself a favor and walk away now. The fight's going to be messy."

Still Dean moved past Sam, positioning himself near the edge of the holy oil. He was trying to keep Michael and Lucifer's attention on him. Lucifer seemed to follow his steps, rounding the side and standing between Sam and Michael.

"Can I talk to her?" Dean asked. "Just for a minute, please?"

"You don't have any rights here!" Michael shouted back. "It doesn't work that way!"

It was in that instant that Sam pulled his gun, took aim and fired. The shot lined up perfectly with Lucifer and would have been a dead on hit. But in a fraction of a second he suddenly disappeared and the bullet struck Mary in the chest. Time seemed to stand still after that as she sucked in a labored breath of air. For a moment Michael stared down at the bullet hole that was seeping blood down the front of Mary's shirt in complete and utter shock.

"Oh god..." Sam said, lowering his gun.

Just as when Zachariah was killed a burst of white light erupted in the clearing, before with a shriek she fell to the ground. Scorched remnants of wings outstretched on the ground, and Mary's eyes were frozen on the sky.

"No..." Dean breathed out and immediately darted for her. "Mary!"

He fell to his knees and felt for a pulse even though he knew there was no point. She was gone. Cas followed and instinctively tried to bring her back, but nothing happened.

"Fuck, Cas... Do something." Dean said, his voice shaking. "Do something... Please."

"I-I can't... I don't have the power."

Things went from bad to worse when Lucifer reappeared in the cemetery. He didn't speak and instead went ballistic, the first person he went for was Bobby. With a crack his neck was snapped, and he went for Sam next. Killing him meant he'd have no solid vessel, so he made do with pummeling him to the ground and stealing his gun. He popped off one round hitting Cas in the chest, then started in on Dean. In a matter of less than two minutes, Mary was dead, Bobby, Cas- And Dean wasn't far from it.

"Stop!" Sam shouted, holding his stomach in agony. "Please just stop!"

Lucifer dropped Dean and he hit the ground with a thump.

"You know," He said, moving forward. "I would've done as you asked if you'd just given me the chance, Sam. I would've saved all of them, I would have. Believe me, the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you. After all, you're the one who set me free, I owed you everything. But this..." He held the gun up. "I never expected this. What is it? What's left of Michael's sword? It'd have to be, since it's the only thing in creation that could kill him, or myself."

Dean choked up a mouthful of blood and could barely see past his swollen face. Sam tried to push himself up at least enough to see how far gone his brother was.

"I know what you're thinking," Lucifer went on, crouching down beside Dean and rolling him over to his back. "Why would I be angry, right? Michael's dead, which means, _technically_, I won. But there's no sportsmanship in the way he was taken out. I was supposed to end him, not you." He stood again and moved closer to Sam. "For centuries I've been locked in my cage waiting for this day, and you ruined it. I still need you as a vessel, Sam- If I'm going to finish everything else here, but that doesn't mean I'm letting either of you off the hook for what you've done."

"Just let Dean go," Sam choked out. "P-Please."

"You don't get to request anything from me anymore, Sammy-" Lucifer shook his head. "I'm sorry, I didn't want it to be this way."

Dean forced himself up to lean on his elbow, casting a knowing look to Sam. It was over now, he knew that, so he wobbly reached inside his jacket.

Lucifer turned and latched onto Dean's wrist, twisting it to the point he heard bones cracking.

"Let me guess," Lucifer sighed. "You've got a gun too?"

He reached into the folds of his jacket and rifled through it until his fingers grazed cold metal, he felt his brows squeeze together when he pulled out a flask, instead of a gun.

"Wrong." Dean said, then another shot rang out.

The bullet smacked Lucifer straight between the eyes, and when he fell to the ground Sam was sitting up pointing Dean's pistol. Just because they split the bullets didn't mean Dean actually had his gun. Sam was the only one that could manage this, so he kept them both in his jacket. A third burst of white light shot through the cemetery, and both Sam and Dean watched the entire thing until all fell silent.

Once it was over Dean fell onto his back, and Sam crawled his way closer and collapsed beside him.

"Dean," Sam muttered. "I'm... I'm so sorry. It's my fault she's..."

"Don't, Sammy-" Dean interrupted, he closed his eyes and bit back tears. "It's not your fault."

Sam shifted his eyes to where Bobby laid, then across the way where Cas fell.

"Dean," Sam forced himself to sit up. "Where's Cas?"

Dean rolled over as best as he could. "What the hell... Where's Mary?"

They were both gone, even the markings of wings had suddenly vanished. After Sam pulled himself to stand, he lugged Dean up next with a grunt.

"Where'd they go?" Dean asked, wiping the blood from his face. "They were... They were dead."

Paranoia sank in, and they fixed their eyes on Lucifer's still body expecting him to suddenly disappear too, but he didn't. His cold dead eyes stared blankly upwards, unmoving and dull. If it weren't for the black wing markings, no one ever would've known they'd just killed the devil. When a sudden gust of wind smacked them in the backs, they each swung around.

It was Cas, standing there looking just as confused as they felt.

"What the hell..." Dean stumbled forward. "Cas, you're alive?"

Cas stared down at himself, and there was no trace of a gun shot wound. "Apparently so."

"How, man? He shot you, we watched you die." Sam said.

Cas moved forward and laid his fingertips on their foreheads, healing them instantly, then turned to where Mary was supposed to be and his feet skidded to a stop.

"Where is she?!" He swung around again, his eyes wide.

"That's what we'd like to know." Dean said, still cringing even though his wounds were gone. "She's just... Gone. What the fuck happened to my kid, Cas?"

Cas didn't speak and instead moved to Bobby, laying his fingertips on his forehead now. They could hear his neck snap back into place before he sucked in a deep breath of air.

"God brought me back," Cas said, standing. "He must have, it's the only explanation as to why I'm back to my old self. If he resurrected me, then he must have taken Mary's..." He paused. "He must have taken her."

"Does that mean she's alive?" Dean felt his heart skip.

"I don't know. I can't sense her, and if she were alive I should be able to. When Michael possessed her he would have removed the sigils from her ribs." His eyes drooped. "I don't... I don't believe she's alive."

"Jesus..." Dean put both hands on his head and started pacing. "Well this is fucking perfect, huh? We risk our asses to save this damn planet and what'd we get to show for it? My kid's dead. How is that fair?" He was trying not to break down but he failed, so Sam moved over and pulled him into a hug. "She fucking trusted me to watch her back, and I couldn't even do that."

Cas actually had to move over to the Impala and sit on the hood, and angel or not he couldn't seem to catch his breath.

Maybe they had set out to do what they intended, Lucifer was dead, but they could find no joy in it. Because they were still alive and Mary was gone.

* * *

I couldn't remember much, only bits and pieces. Like Michael possessing me and being zapped all over the fucking planet, and finally the cemetery where Dad, Sam, Cas and Bobby happened to be. I knew I got shot, or well, Michael did. And that was the last of it. Sam had accidentally shot me. God... Poor Sam, poor Dad... Poor everyone. Here I was, fucking dead apparently, and I had no way of telling them that it was okay, that I didn't blame them. At least we got Michael. I had no idea if Lucifer was taken out or not, but I could rest assured that the battle wouldn't happen because Michael was dead.

When my eyes opened I wasn't sure what to expect. I figured it'd be heaven, my own personal heaven and frick, in a twisted way I was actually looking forward to seeing what it was. What my eyes were met with however was a dirty cracked ceiling.

Um, okay. Well, this could be a number of places, I thought. Don't knock it just yet, after all- It's heaven, and your own heaven was supposed to be something happy, right?

So I sat up, and the confusion hit me like a ton of bricks. I was in a room, empty but for a rickety metal desk in the middle. And yeah sure, that was odd enough all in itself, but who was sitting on the edge of that desk had me even more stumped.

"Uh," I said, pulling myself to my feet. "Chuck... No offense, but... What the flying crap are you doing in my heaven?"

Seriously, why was I in heaven with a prophet I'd only met once in my life? And what's more, is why was he just sitting there smiling at me.

"Hey, Mary." He said, nodding. "Nice to see you again."

"_Okayyy_-" I rubbed my head. "Normally I'd say the same, but..."

"This isn't heaven," He cut me off, snickering. "If it was it would be more along the lines of the beach in Florida you visited when you were a little girl."

I swallowed hard. "Well, okay, but... What's going on?"

He sighed and I couldn't help but notice that the anxious and fidgety man I'd met the first time was long gone. He looked the same physically, but he wasn't the same, if that made sense at all. His clothes were clean, the tattered t-shirt and dingy plaid bathrobe was replaced with a starch white button up that was tucked neatly into a pair of gray slacks.

"This is gonna be kind of hard to believe, Mary." He said, his tone soft. "But, I'm not who you think I am."

"You're not?" I blinked a few times over. "So... You're not a prophet?"

"No," He shook his head. "I'm not."

"Then... Who the hell are you?" I sighed and rubbed my temples. "Please don't tell me you're another dick angel."

"No, not an angel. Don't worry." He moved his eyes upwards, making the dark circles beneath them that much more obvious. "Listen, I want to thank you, Mary- For what you did. Honestly, it was something that I should have stopped a long time ago, but I just couldn't. It's hard to understand, so I guess the best way to put it is, would you be able to kill your own children, no matter how wicked or corrupt they might have been?"

I was slack jawed now, which he noticed. "I'm sorry, but... What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Lucifer," He sighed, shaking his head. "He was always... Jealous, and disobedient. Hot headed and haughty. He thought he was the center of the universe and when humanity came along, he just couldn't take that. After everything started and I gave Michael the order to cast Lucifer out, I left and didn't turn back. And I've been gone ever since. Most of my children think it was a cowardly thing to do, but- It wasn't that at all."

No, wait, wait a friggin second! The way he was talking he was goin on as though he was...

"Oh... My god-" I spat, then shook my head. "I mean, shit... I mean, Jesus... Crap, would you just friggin stop me already!"

His brows rose and he smiled. "Calm down, Mary. It's not that big of a deal."

"Not that big a deal? Are you nuts! Or am I nuts? Obviously I must be... You're not _him_. You can't be."

"That's the reaction I was expecting. It's pretty hard to believe, I know." He rose his arms. "Didn't expect God to look like me, huh?"

I needed to sit down but there wasn't any furniture in this damn room.

"Okay, wait- So, if you're really _him_... Why would you _thank _me for what happened?" I asked.

"Like I said, I could've stepped in and stopped everything, but I couldn't kill my son. And, I knew that locking him back in his cage wasn't the solution either. Eventually, one way or another, he would've found a way to bust out a second time and the world would be thrust into the same situation all over again. Really, the only answer was for him to... _Go_-" He moved his eyes to the floor. "So when I found out you came back here, I knew eventually you'd find out where the Michael sword was. _It _was the perfect solution."

Okay, don't friggin blow up at God, I told myself. But I couldn't help but be pissed.

"So lemme get this straight," I said, minding my tone. "You knew I was here all along, you knew what was gonna happen and after it's all over and done with you just let me die? I mean, why not- You got what you wanted, so-"

"Mary," He interrupted. "You're not dead. Not anymore."

"I-I'm not?"

"Uh, no. I brought you back, I brought Cas back too."

"Wait," I held up my hand. "Cas died?"

He nodded sadly. "Yeah, not long after you did. But it's okay now, he's back and good as new."

"And Dad and Sam?"

"They're fine."

I heaved out a relieved sigh. "Thank god... I mean... Well, yeah. But that still doesn't tell me what the frick's going on? Why you're just sitting around and..."

"Ah the age old question. Why don't I step up and do anything about all the evil going on down here, right?" I nodded in answer. "Well it all falls down to free will, Mary. I created humans with free will knowing all to well that sometimes bad things might happen because of it. Sometimes really horrible things that cause a lot of suffering. But, if I stepped in and stopped all of that, well-" He shrugged. "It kind of negates the whole point of free will don't you think? Because if I constantly put a stop to everything, where's the freedom gone? The choices? It's not natural anymore."

I nodded. "And in the end this place wouldn't be any different than heaven, and the-" I cleared my throat. "Sorry but, the mindless drones called angels."

He gave a crooked smile. "Pretty much, yeah. Which is why I think you can understand why I favor humanity so much."

"So uh. Why exactly am I here with you right now? There's gotta be a good reason."

He crossed his arms.

"I brought you here because of what you've accomplished so far. I've known what your intentions were from the beginning and I agree with what you've been doing, which is why I haven't put a stop to it. Believe me it's not like me to get involved especially after what I told you about free will, but... I've seen what happens to your family, and the sacrifices they make and what comes from it." He paused and the smile faded. "It's not good. So I get why you came back here and tried to fix it, I do. But I think there's something you don't understand."

The fact that I was standing there talking to _God_ was mind-boggling. And I was still trying to convince myself that this wasn't just some crazy dream, or that I had died and this was actually heaven. Of course that just left the question of why would I be in heaven with Chuck, and not my family, and why would my heaven be this little room with nothing but one desk and blank walls.

"Okay then what is it I don't understand?" I asked.

His eyes went soft, actually he looked pretty sad, which was surprising really.

"I'm giving you a choice now, Mary-" He said. "I can send you back to your own time now, you can be done with all of this."

I felt a knot form in my throat. Why would he want to send me back unless he knew something that I didn't? Obviously he did, seeing as he was God.

"Why would I go back?" I replied finally.

"You've been through a lot so far," He sighed. "More than one girl should have to go through. And if you stay here and keep going on with this it's only gonna get worse. I really don't see a way for you to survive it, you _won't _survive it. You want to take all of this away from your family and instead take it on yourself, but you don't understand the severity of it. I've seen what happens-" He swallowed. "And it's pretty damn bad. So I'm giving you the option of going back to your own time and sparing yourself what's gonna happen."

Shit, it was going to be worse than everything that I'd already experienced? How is that possible? I'd been shot, been kidnapped by angels and tortured twice, what else could happen? Oh and being possessed by Michael, that wasn't a lot of fun either. And the clincher, going and getting shot _again _and then actually dying from it. Was I missing anything?

But like I told myself since I came back to 2009, I wasn't doing this for me I was doing it for Dad and Sam. So really I guess I could take whatever torture might be coming in the future. It's not like I hadn't experienced it already.

"Have I changed enough? If I go back now will things be different?"

Chucks brows rose. "No, Mary. Don't get me wrong you've changed a lot, but... In order to fix everything you would have to stay." He answered.

"Then I can't go back. I'm not done here." I finished.

He sighed and shook his head. "Are you sure? This is a one time offer. If you don't take it now then there's nothing more I can do."

"If I haven't made enough of an impact to help my family then I can't go back, Chuck."

Even if I did end up dying permanently in the end, it didn't matter to me. Of course I could never, ever, tell Dad that. But I knew it wasn't gonna be easy coming back here, I knew this could happen and I accepted it.

His smile returned but his eyes still seemed just as sad.

"This is why I favor humanity. The fact that one little girl would go through so much just for the family she loves." He nodded. "Alright, if this is what you want. So be it. I'll send you back to your Dad in _this _year."

"Just like that?" I questioned. "You don't expect anything in return?"

"Actually, yeah-" He stood. "It might be best if you didn't mention who I really am, Mary. It could be dangerous for you, for your Dad and Sam. Don't get me wrong, I don't expect you to lie, just..."

"Conveniently forget your name and face?" I said, smirking. "By the way, exactly how long have I been gone?"

"Not long, a few hours. So it shouldn't be too much of a shock when they see you again."

Ha, yeah right. Everyone was gonna shit their pants if they believed I was dead.

"Listen, uh... Thanks for, ya know... Not letting me stay dead." I awkwardly fidgeted. "Yeah, thanks. I still don't get why you really care about me exactly, but yeah..."

He smiled, but it was mainly out of habit I think- Because I could see behind his eyes that he wasn't happy about this.

"I like your family, they've done more than I can comprehend to save this planet. And, uh, I don't think you'll be thanking me later, Mary. Not after everything that's gonna happen." He moved closer. "Are you absolutely sure about this?"

"Yes, I'm positive."

After a deep sigh he nodded. "Then I wish you luck."

I was soon enveloped in a bright white light that was replaced less than a second later by a dark road surrounded by trees and empty fields. I turned only to be met with headlights and the Impala screeching to a stop as I fell backwards with a squeal.

"Shit," I muttered. "Thanks a lot, God. Nothin like sending me back to get run over."

Once the car stopped just inches away from me, I heard the doors open and pounding footsteps on the blacktop.

"Mary?" Dad said, his face was what I expected. Completely stunned.

"Yeah," I said, then stood and brushed the gravel and dirt from my butt. "It's me."

He slammed into me with a hug so tight I was certain he'd crack ribs. My feet weren't touching the ground anymore, my toes just barely grazed it and I couldn't breathe, but I didn't care.

"I thought I'd lost you, kid." He mumbled into my neck. "What the hell happened?"

"Kind of a long story," I chuckled. "Are you guys okay?"

When he pulled away Sam was next, and I had lift off- My feet didn't stand a chance at touching the ground now.

"Thank god you're okay," He said. "I'm so sorry for what I did, Mary. You have no idea."

"It's okay, Sammy. It was an accident."

But I knew he wouldn't let it go at that, he was gonna beat himself up about this til the end of times. I was just gonna have to make sure that he knew I didn't hold it against him, it's not like he intentionally meant to shoot me. Lucifer just got the drop on him, that's all.

After our hug fest he put me down and I peaked past him to Cas. He hadn't spoken a word since I popped up, but he looked just as stunned as everyone else.

"What, no hug?" I asked sarcastically.

Nope, I didn't get a hug. Instead he walked over and kissed me, and he didn't care at all that Dad was standing right there. It lasted a good thirty seconds or so before Dad cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"Hey whoa, okay there, Romeo-" He grabbed Cas by the shoulders and pulled him away. "Take a friggin breath already."

I tried to hide my embarrassment by moving my eyes to the ground.

"Okay, so we gotta settle this now," Dad went on. "How the hell are you back, Mary?"

"Same way Cas's back," I shrugged. "God."

Sam nodded. "Well, we kinda figured that, but... Where've you been for the last eight hours?"

Eight hours? Holy crap it felt like one at the most.

I looked to each of them only then noticing that Bobby wasn't there.

"Uh," I scratched the back of my head nervously. "Well, I was with... God."

And now they all three gaped at me like I'd lost my mind, or that I'd just announced... Well, I guess there wasn't anything bigger than I'd sat and friggin talked to God now was there?

"Wait-" Cas shook off the surprise. "You spoke with him? Face to face?"

"Yeah." I nodded.

"And you still have eyes?" Dad barked, he looked ready to pass out.

"Well he wasn't all glowy or anything, he looked like a normal guy. In disguise actually."

"Who was he?" Sam asked.

Hopefully my acting wasn't too bad with this one. "I dunno. Some dude, I've never seen him before, I didn't know him- But he sure as hell knows us."

"I don't understand," Cas looked more startled then Dad and Sam combined. "If God resurrected you, then why weren't you with us from the beginning- Why did he keep you with him for so long, Mary?"

Dad kept his arm around my shoulder and wouldn't budge, and I really didn't think there was a way I could lie about this one, so- I just decided to go for the truth, minus a few details here and there.

"He wanted to talk to me. About everything that happened, let us know that he was grateful for it. And, uh... He said if I wanted to he could send me back to my own year, but I turned him down."

"Wait, what?" Sam stood tall. "Why would he offer that?"

"He said that after everything that happened, he figured I might wanna go back, but I said no. I'm not exactly done here ya know? There's still a lot of shit that I gotta fix."

Dad cleared his throat then pulled me towards the car. "Well, we can talk about this more later. Let's get outa here."

I was all for that. I wasn't sure how long I'd been gone while possessed by Michael, but it felt like years. And, seeing is that I couldn't remember anything about the Michael sword, something told me Cas must've erased my memories. At least everything was making some sense now.

After climbing into my usual spot in the backseat, Cas moved to his beside me. He gave me one of his small smiles before Dad and Sam jumped in and we sped off.


	36. Chapter 36

_**So I think I just decided to keep posting chapters in this story. It's easier that way lol.**_

* * *

I was going over everything that I remembered. From Dad's stories he told me all my life, to what Crowley gave me. Most might assume that since we'd averted Sam actually jumping in the cage that it would be over and done with now. Maybe what ended up happening with Sammy in the future would never happen. But, him falling in the cage, losing his soul, and almost dying from that later was just the beginning. In fact, it wasn't near over. Because there was so much more that was gonna happen down the line that would still lead up to Sam going crazy and shooting Dad.

Apparently that was true, seeing is that Chuck had told me I hadn't done enough to completely fix what went wrong. It might be kinda hard to comprehend that I could actually make that much of an impact, but the one thing I was, was determined. Even if it seemed impossible, I wasn't gonna give up.

But in the days that passed after Lucifer and Michael were killed, no one really seemed to have any interest in talking about jobs. Surprising enough Sam didn't research for any, and Dad didn't nag at him to research. Actually, the only thing we'd been doing was driving the country, eating at crap diners and just relaxing.

It was kinda nice actually, not worrying about what we were gonna do next. Not that it wasn't on my mind anyhow. Eventually I knew we'd be back in the game, it was only a matter of time. But for the moment, everyone needed this down time. They deserved it after all. Bobby had went back home after being brought back, and last I heard he was taking a mini vacation.

"Wake up kid," Dad said, tapping me on the shoulder. "It's past noon already."

I rolled over, glancing at the clock on the nightstand.

"Jeez," I groaned. "I haven't slept this long in... Ever, I don't think."

"Well I'm hungry, so let's go grab somethin, okay?"

Sam and Cas were sitting at the table, and while Sam was looking at his laptop, I couldn't help but notice that he was looking at apartment ads. I wasn't sure why, unless maybe it had something to do with a possible case somewhere.

But I rolled out of bed, and after a quick trip to the bathroom I was dressed and following Dad outside. Still unable to _not _notice how Sam and Cas weren't following us.

"Aren't they coming?" I asked.

"Nope-" He opened the drivers side door. "Just you and me."

Okay, so was I in trouble again? No, Dad seemed way too chipper to be pissed at me. So there must've been another reason he wanted us to go alone. I didn't question it, I was used to this kinda thing by now. And after driving for about twenty minutes we came across a food truck that was sitting just off the edge of a park.

I grabbed an empty picnic table that was secluded under several trees, while Dad got our food.

It was nice out today, warm. Compared to what it had been. But we were on the outer edges of Florida. I wasn't sure why we drove here of all places, but it seemed Dad didn't really have a specific destination in mind. He just wanted to drive.

Once he sat he laid a burrito down in front of me.

"Dig in." He said, taking his own advice and snarfing down a huge bite of his.

I tore the foil off and managed a couple bites before I noticed him gawking at me.

"What?" I garbled with my mouth full. "I got somethin on my face?"

"No," He smiled faintly. "Was just doing some thinkin."

"About what?"

After another large bite he nodded.

"Got another idea I wanna run by you," He started. "About what our next gig might be."

"Okay," I shrugged, I knew it was only a matter of time before Dad would wanna start up again. "What is it?"

I never knew Dad to be scared of anything, or at least never showing it. He always tried not to for my sake I think, but this time he looked pretty damn anxious.

"What would you think if we..." He stopped and swallowed a gulp of coke. "Left the life?"

My burrito hit the table with a messy splat.

"Are you serious?" I replied.

"Maybe, I've been thinking about it a lot since you got here- And I know you've been through a lot of crap for me and Sammy. But if we left, Mary- if we didn't hunt anymore, all of that would stop. You'll have fixed what you wanted to fix and I can be sure that you're not gonna get fucked over anymore."

It's funny, or weird, or _whatever- _But in all the times I laid awake at night and tried to figure out ways out of our future problems, actually leaving the life behind never even crossed my mind. Which, now that I thought about it, it would basically solve everything. If we weren't hunting anymore then all of the shit that was supposed to happen later would never happen.

"Wow," I sat back. "I guess I never woulda thought you'd actually wanna do that."

I studied his eyes after that, expecting to see something hidden in them. Like maybe he was only suggesting this for my sake alone, and it wasn't something he really wanted to do. Dad had been a hunter all his life, and even though the job could get messy at times I knew deep down he loved it. It was hard to picture my Dad as a regular old working Joe. But what was surprising was that I _didn't _see anything hidden in his eyes.

"Yeah, well-" He went on. "Things change I guess. Don't get me wrong it'd be weird as hell, and I dunno if we could ever really adjust to it, but... It's worth a shot ain't it?"

Was he only doing this for me, because of everything that had happened to me? Or did he actually want it too?

"Dad," I sighed. "I don't want you to end up doin something you'd regret. I don't want you to be unhappy, so if you're only doing this cause..."

"Give it a chance-" He interrupted. "Can't knock it til you try it at least."

"I'm not knocking it," I defended. "I just don't want you to end up doin something that you might resent me for later. Cause if I wasn't here, you'd probably never even think of doing something like this."

He shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not- But like I said things change. So I'm asking your opinion. What would you think if we tried it?"

I started picking pieces of my burrito and flicking it across the table. Really, the thought didn't sound so bad. I'd always wondered what it would be like to wake up in the morning and have a normal routine. Wake up, take a shower, eat breakfast, maybe get ready to go to a normal job somewhere. Yeah, it would've been frickin weird as crap, but it was kinda appealing at the same time.

"If you wanna do it," I answered. "Then it couldn't hurt to try it."

"You sure?"

"Why not," I grabbed my burrito and took another bite. "What're we gonna do exactly?"

Now his eyes fell to the table, and he didn't look like he wanted to answer.

"Did I ever," He cleared his throat nervously. "Did I ever tell you about a girl I knew named Lisa?"

I was taken aback, which I think he noticed by my expression. "Um, no I don't think so... Why?"

He had lost interest in his food by now, which told me he was worried how I was gonna take this.

"She was someone I wanted you to meet, you up for it?" He replied.

I struggled to remember if Dad had ever mentioned someone by that name when I was a kid. During all of the stories he ever told me he never really talked about any old girlfriends. I assumed this Lisa was an old girlfriend because why would he want me to meet her? But no, I guess I couldn't recall ever having heard of her before. Which only made me wonder, if she had actually been important to him, then why was this the first I was hearing her name?

"Okay," I nodded faintly. "Sure, if you want me to."

That made him relax a little. I guess he figured I was gonna be one of those jealous little Daddy's girls that would wanna jam a pitchfork into any woman that tried to get close to him. Which I guess in a way I kinda was. Yeah, I was a Daddy's girl, I admit that- But I wouldn't wanna come between him and whatever kind of happiness he might find out there. So if leaving the life meant he wanted to start things up with this old girlfriend, then I wouldn't object to it.

"So," I tried to act nonchalant about the whole thing. "Where's she from?"

"She was living in Michigan," He answered. "But I tracked her down and she moved to Indiana."

"I guess you've been thinking about this for a while now, right?" I chuckled. "Since you tracked her down already."

"I don't expect anything to happen really, I never did. But yeah, she's just someone I want you to meet." He paused and watched me inhale my burrito. "Thing is... Is that she's got a kid too. A son, he's probably ten now. Name's Ben."

And now I nearly choked on my food. "Wait, a kid?" He nodded. "Is he... Is he yours?"

"According to her, no. She said she had a blood test done when he was a baby. There was something that happened a few years ago, Changelings in her neighborhood and Ben got taken. Sammy and me cleared it up, and that's when she told me that he wasn't mine."

I nodded, and tried to calm the frick down at the thought of maybe having a brother. Not just that, but he was supposed to be my _older_ brother. Only, right at the moment the kid was only ten.

"Oh, so she knows what you do then?" I replied and he nodded in answer."So after we meet Lisa and Ben," I went on. "Then what're we gonna do?"

Not that I didn't know already, but I guess I just wanted him to say it.

"If it all works out maybe we could stick around and see what happens. You cool with that?"

"What about Sam and Cas?"

"Sammy said he'd go wherever we go and Cas? Hell I think he'd follow you anywhere, so..."

Psh, it wasn't just me he'd be following. He'd follow all of us because we were his family now.

"Okay, well whatever you wanna do, Dad, I'll be cool with it."

He smiled and finished off his lunch and before long we were heading back to the motel.

This was awkward, not gonna lie. But just because it was gonna be weird or uncomfortable didn't mean it wouldn't be a good thing.

* * *

I was nervous as anything as I stood by the impala and watched Dad walk up the sidewalk to this Lisa's house. Ha, who the hell knows, if it worked out she'd be my step-mom as friggin weird as that sounded. She was barely thirty I'm sure she was gonna love having a twenty two year old daughter.

Dad glanced at me from over his shoulder long enough to see me give him a thumbs up, then rang the doorbell. Less than thirty seconds later I saw the door open and a pretty dark haired woman stepped out.

She actually looked happy to see him, stunned but happy. I couldn't hear what was being said but she took a peak around him and noticed me, then obviously came questions on who I was. They talked for a couple minutes before Dad turned and she followed him down the steps and back over to me.

"Lisa Braedon," He started. "This is Mary, she's my-"

"Sister," I chimed in, surprising both Dad and me when I spat that out. "His younger sister."

"Wait, Mary you don't..." Dad said but I cut him off again.

"Yeah it's weird, but he didn't know about me til last October. So..."

She smiled and gave me a little wave.

"Well it's nice to meet you, Mary. I can see the resemblance. I'd almost ask if you were twins." She said. "So... Do you guys wanna come in for a beer? Ben will be home from baseball practice in twenty minutes."

Dad was trying to play off what I just did by smiling. "Sure, sounds good."

She led the way inside and to her living room and motioned to the couch. "Take a seat, I'll grab the beers."

So we did, and once she left Dad elbowed me.

"What the hell, Mary? I was gonna tell her the truth." He whispered.

"I know, but she wouldn't understand, Dad. Not many people would. It is kinda weird and I don't wanna be the reason that you two might not hit it off."

He grumbled slightly but didn't disagree.

"Now she's gonna wonder why I brought my little sister along as a chaperone."

Yeah I didn't think about that. All I knew was that as soon as I saw her and the way Dad lit up, I wasn't gonna blow this for him. So when she came back I immediately stood from the couch.

"I actually have to go." I said. "Dean just wanted to introduce us since you've already met Sam, and I'm sure you guys got a lot to talk about, so... I'll just walk back to the motel."

Dad flew to his feet and latched onto my wrist. "Mary, that's not..."

"Come on, I'll be fine. The motel's not far, I can walk." I pulled away. "It was nice to meet you Lisa."

"Same here." She smiled, not looking at all disappointed that I was leaving. Which was understandable. Who'd want an annoying little sister tagging along when she clearly had the hots for my Dad and wanted to be alone with him.

I tried to shake that disturbing thought off as she led me to the front door. Dad gave me a weak smile before I waved goodbye and started down the steps.

"Hey, at least call Cas. Have him come get you, okay? So you don't gotta walk alone." Dad said.

I just nodded and started down the sidewalk, and heard the door close behind me. I made it to the end of the block before sitting down on the curb and letting out a sigh.

Why did I get the feeling this wasn't gonna work out? I couldn't explain why, and really I didn't have a reason. I'd only met the woman for five minutes, that's hardly enough time to come to that conclusion. But, somehow- I just knew that having me around wasn't gonna be in the cards. I'd be in the way, more then likely I'd cause some kind of strain in what could've been a decent relationship with him and Lisa. Sixth sense coming to surface again maybe? I didn't know. All I knew was that I had a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that only intensified the longer I sat there moping.

"Cas," I finally said. "If you're not busy can you come get me?"

Since my ribs weren't scribbled on anymore it was simple enough for him to track me down, and within two seconds he'd poofed to the corner with me. He must've noticed my sour expression, because he sat down beside me and sighed.

"Did it not go well?" He asked.

"It was fine," I shrugged. "I was only there long enough to say hey, then I bailed."

"Why didn't you stay? I thought Dean wanted you to get to know her?"

"He does I guess, but I was just in the way I think."

He eyed me carefully before his brows pulled together. "Is something wrong?"

"Technically no, there's nothing wrong." I shrugged again. "But whatever's gonna happen now is just gonna take a while to get used to I think."

He nodded and scooted closer. "There's something I've been wanting to talk to you about- And I believe it's what's considered an inopportune time to do so, but- I've been delaying far too long already."

Now he wasn't looking at me, and even though I could only study his profile I could see his lips cinched and jaw clenched.

"Shit..." I breathed out. "You're leaving, aren't you? Going back to heaven?"

Still he wouldn't look at me. "It's not that I want to, Mary. But with Michael dead there's no way of knowing what could happen. If I were to guess it's probably complete anarchy up there."

"Cas," I grabbed his hand and squeezed. "This is how it starts. Remember what I told you? Raphael is gonna start up his shit and you try to find a way of stopping him. That's what leads up to you working with Crowley and busting into purgatory."

"I'm well aware of that," Finally, he looked at me. "But I can promise you that's not going to happen this time."

"Are you sure about that? Cause I know how this goes, and how messy it gets up there, and how desperate you might be to fix it."

He turned to face me and laid his free hand over mine. "Mary, no matter what happens I'm not going to resort to that path. I'm grateful that you came back here and told me, that way I won't have to make such a horrible mistake. I swear, it's not going to come to that."

Thankfully he sounded sincere, and I really didn't have a reason to question him. Like he said, he knew now what would happen if he actually did all of that- And how big of a mistake it was.

"Okay, well-" I sighed sadly. "I guess this is it then, huh? You're probably gonna be up there a while, which means... It might be a long time before I see you again, right?"

Well he was back to not looking at me again, which felt like a punch to the gut.

"I can't answer that. It all depends on how serious the matter is in heaven. But, I'll always find a way of coming back for you, even if it's only for a few seconds. And I would appreciate if you could possibly pray to me every now and then, it would be nice to hear your voice."

Still it felt like I'd been punched in the gut- But, this is just what came along with me traveling back here. I had to go with whatever came along, and Cas returning to heaven to fight Raphael was one of those things. Dad hooking up with Lisa was probably one of those things too. I still didn't know what Sam was gonna be up to though. The last I noticed, he was looking at apartments in this town, and colleges around the area. So if I were to guess, he was gonna go back to the way things were before his girlfriend died. Now I just needed to figure out what I was gonna do. It was just weird thinking that I might actually end up going to college, or getting a regular job. Somehow I didn't think the need for hunting would disappear that quickly, or ever.

"Will you do that for me, Mary?" He asked, tugging lightly on my hand.

"Oh..." I shook it off. "Yeah, of course I will. But only if you promise that you'll be careful up there and don't get yourself killed."

I knew he wouldn't promise that though, because he had no idea what was gonna happen up there. And knowing him, if he promised it, and then something ended up happening to him... Yeah... He couldn't make that promise- So the only thing he offered was a faint smile.

The rumble of the Impala cut through the silence after that, and Dad pulled to a stop on the street corner we sat at.

"Hey," He shouted from the drivers seat. "What're you still doin out here?"

When I didn't answer right off he cut the engine and climbed out.

"Cas was just telling me goodbye." I said, trying to fake off the sadness with a smile.

"Goodbye?" Dad immediately glared at him. "Where the hell are you going?"

We both stood and Cas couldn't seem to make eye contact with Dad. "I have to return to heaven. If what Mary told me is still going to happen, then there's going to be civil war up there- And it's something that I have to be present for."

"Shit..." Dad muttered. "That sounds like it could get pretty hairy, Cas... You sure it's somethin you wanna tackle alone?"

He nodded. "It's in heaven, so I could hardly expect any assistance from here on earth."

"Well," Dad stepped closer. "If something turns up and there's anything we can do, just holler at us and we'll come running, okay? After everything you've done for us, it's the least we can do."

But he wouldn't, I knew that already. Because even though Cas claimed he wasn't gonna team up with Crowley, he still wouldn't want to risk us for a battle that was way past our pay grade. He'd rather stand back and get his ass kicked and let us live normally, than to ask for any kind of help.

"Thank you, Dean." Cas said anyhow. "I'll keep that in mind."

And then Dad surprised him by giving him a hug, and I struggled to remember if he'd done that at all since I came back here. Nope, I don't think he did, so naturally Cas was awkward about it.

"Watch your ass up there, man-" Dad went on. "Don't get killed."

Dad passed me a glance before climbing back in the car and cranking up the radio. I guess to give us as much privacy as possible. Well, at least he was acknowledging us now, and so far didn't want to tare Cas' head off.

"So," I sighed. "I guess I'll try to make this as _not_ awkward as possible, huh?"

"You don't have to say anything, Mary-" He replied. "Just know that this isn't easy for me, and if I had a choice it would be to stay here with you... With all of you, but... I can't."

"I know, so-" I reached up and gave him a hug which he returned. "Don't forget about us down here, okay? And come back anytime you want."

I didn't wanna let go, and it didn't seem like he wanted to either. After all, this could've been the last time we actually saw each other. When he pulled away finally, he cupped his hand on my face, held a kiss on my forehead for a good ten seconds and didn't say anything before disappearing.

It took a second to shake it off before I jumped in the car and we started back towards the motel.

"You okay?" Dad asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Cause if you wanna talk about it or whatever..."

"Dad," I cut him off. "Really, I'm okay. I'm not stupid, I know how this is supposed to go." Yeah I know, I totally pulled a Dean Winchester right there in wanting to avoid talking about my feelings. "So, how'd it go with Lisa?"

He flicked the radio off before answering. "Pretty good. We're gonna have lunch tomorrow. You're coming too since Ben's gonna be there, so you can meet the kid."

Awesome, more awkwardness. Still I faked a smile and pretended like that feeling in my gut wasn't there. When we finally pulled into the motel drive I was partly relieved. At least I could take a shower and go to bed early.

After Dad unlocked the door we both stood there staring inside with our eyes wide. The room had been completely ransacked. Clothes and bed covers were strewn everywhere, our duffels had been torn apart and scattered. Sam's laptop was still sitting open on the table, his cell phone was busted on the floor beside it- But he was no where in site.

Sam was gone.


	37. Chapter 37

"Where the hell is he?!" Dad shouted, as he sped down the highway. "Do you know anything about this?"

"No," I shook my head adamantly. "I swear I have no idea, Dad- You never told me about this. As far as I know it didn't even happen. Cause if things played out the way they did before, Sammy would've been locked in the cage with Lucifer."

There was no logical explanation why Sammy would've just disappeared like that, or why the room was fucked up like there had been a fight. His phone was smashed, looking to have been stepped on- Like someone was preventing him from calling for help.

"I tried calling Cas back down here like a dozen times," Dad went on. "But he's obviously already busy with shit up in heaven."

"Yeah," I tried to shake away the nerves by tapping my hands on my knees. "So how're we gonna find him?"

"Not _we_, Mary-" Dad corrected. "Me, you're gonna stay with Bobby til I figure out what the fuck is goin on."

"I thought Bobby was taking a vacation or something?"

"Bobby's idea of a vacation is staying home with a bottle of Jack."

I scowled at him. "Please don't ditch me with this one. I wanna help, you're gonna need me with you."

"No," He shook his head. "Cause I don't know what the hell is going on, and what it was that took Sam. I'm not gonna take the risk of something happening to you too."

"Dad..."

"Mary, I said no!" He glared at me. "Don't fight me with this. I don't wanna have to worry about you while I'm trying to figure out what the fuck happened to Sam, okay?"

If I ever wanted to smack my Dad, now would be the time. After everything we'd been through lately, you'd think he wouldn't wanna separate and that he'd have the sense to not fucking ditch me. Like he said, he didn't know who or what took Sam, which meant he'd be out there by himself with no friggin backup. This time, I wasn't gonna back down and stay silent about it.

"No," I shook my head. "Sorry but I'm not listening to you this time. I'm an adult and can make up my own damn mind, and I'm coming with you!"

I guess he figured his dagger eyes and sinister stare would sway me, but he was wrong. I was used to that face, and could mimic it almost perfectly. Yeah maybe if it wasn't such a serious situation I might've backed down because of that face, but not this time.

"Listen to me," He said. "You were dead less than a week ago, Mary. You fucking died, so if you think I'm just gonna let you call the shots here then you got another thing comin. Maybe you are an adult, but I'm still your Dad, which means it's my job to protect you. So, you're gonna do what I say this time, even if it means I gotta tie you to a frickin chair to keep you from following me."

Well awesome, I knew he'd make good on that threat. It wouldn't be the first time he actually had me on lock down. It happened several times in the future, mainly when I was a little girl and would try to run away once he took off on a job. Back then I didn't know any better, and the only thing I could think about was being with my Daddy, and even being a kid I somehow always managed to run away when Cas wasn't looking. Once I got older, it got to the point where Cas pretty much followed me everywhere in the bunker besides the bathroom, to make sure I wouldn't pull that shit again, which were Dad's orders.

So I stopped arguing, because I knew from here on out it'd be completely pointless. And I didn't say another word the entire drive to South Dakota.

We drove all night before we pulled into Bobby's drive and cut the engine. Bobby had met us outside after Dad made a call, and once we stepped into his house he got down to business.

"I've been makin some calls," He said, stopping behind his desk. "To a few hunters out there that owed me a favor. So they heard Sam's not the first hunter to go missing. Apparently a few others just up and disappeared too."

"And do they know who's responsible?" Dad replied.

Bobby grumbled as he sat down. "No one's got a clue. The only thing I know is that whoever's doin this is going after hunters that haven't been known for makin the best choices, if you know what I mean."

"Uh," Dad shook his head. "No, I don't."

"Meaning, that they've all made some bad mistakes like Sam did in the past. Some are known as reckless, others pretty much bat shit insane. The type of hunters that don't care who gets killed or hurt as long as they get their monsters."

I glanced to Dad to see him just as stiff and frigid as he had been the entire drive.

"Kinda like that hunter named Gerry?" I asked. "The one who shot me and Cas?"

"But Sammy hasn't made a stupid choice for months now. Not since Lucifer broke out. He's been clean from the demon blood, and he helped us take down Michael and Lucifer." Dad added, ignoring my questions.

"Yeah, well-" Bobby sat back in his chair and shrugged. "I can't explain it. No one seems to know anything, only that some hunters have gone AWOL."

"So we don't have a way of tracking him... Perfect." Dad flopped down on the sofa.

"Well, there might be somethin," Bobby grabbed a map from the corner of his desk. "The last two of the hunters were spotted was in Nevada, heading towards Elko. So, best guess is that'd be where I'd start lookin for Sam."

"Wait," I held up my hand. "How were the hunters spotted if they were abducted?"

Bobby glanced from me to Dad. "That's the thing, they weren't taken, they just up and left on their own- Security cameras near one of their cars showed they tore everything apart, staged it to look like an abduction, but they walked outa there on their own."

Dad's face went completely blank, but his eyes could shoot fire. "Wait a fucking second, are you sayin that Sammy ransacked our motel room, busted up his phone and made us _think_ he was taken?"

"No, that ain't what I'm saying, boy- I'm just saying that's what happened with two of the others. But, you gotta admit it's awful strange that Sam would vanish in the same way those two yahoos did, right?"

I felt even more like I was gonna puke now, because there wasn't any logical reason why Sam would do something like that. He wouldn't fake a kidnapping and freak Dad and me out like that, he wouldn't. Maybe those other hunters did it, but not our Sam. It didn't make sense.

"Okay, well I'm heading to Nevada then." Dad said and jumped back up. "Mary's staying with you, so keep an eye out on her."

Bobby didn't object and I followed him sadly to the door and onto the porch steps.

"Be careful, Dad." I said. "You don't know what you're gonna find out there."

He avoided my eyes as he pursed his lips. "Yeah, I will. Do me a favor and don't give Bobby trouble, just do as he says and don't pull any Houdini acts, okay?"

Under normal circumstances I wouldn't promise that- But Dad looked about ready to crumble from the weight of Sam missing on his shoulders, and I didn't wanna contribute to that.

"Okay, I'll behave this time I guess." I tried smiling, but it was stiff and forced. "Just in case, keep trying to get Cas back down here, have him give you a hand."

I was hoping he'd change his mind about leaving me, and for a minute it seemed as though he was actually contemplating it. But, of course that didn't last long before he pulled me into a hug and topped it off by kissing my cheek.

"Be good." He said, then jumped back in the impala and sped off.

* * *

After the first couple days at Bobby's I was ready to climb the damn walls. Dad called everyday, sometimes more than once, to let us know how he was doing and what he'd found out- Which wasn't a whole hell of a lot. But, he did happen to question some people in Nevada that said they remembered seeing Sammy pass through so I guess that was better than absolutely nothing.

Since I was stuck at Bobby's I spent my time praying to Cas, hoping that he was doing okay up there and could actually hear me- And the rest of the time was spent searching for anything that might've given us answers on why Sam disappeared. As it turns out, three days after Dad dumped me off at Bobby's, two more hunters just up and ditched the jobs they were currently working- Leaving everything they had behind. Their vehicles, their weapons, even their clothes. And just as the others had, the last anyone saw of them they were heading to Nevada.

Obviously I was still clinging to the hope that Sam didn't do this on his own- Not that I wanted him to be kidnapped, no of course I didn't- But at least with that we'd know he wasn't up to something dangerous or maybe shady. The only thought going through my mind was that somehow, someone had gotten to him and fucked with his head again. Like Zachariah had done when he forced Sam to kill Lilith and bust Lucifer out. Someone was fucking with him, and made him ditch Dad and me. That was the only answer I figured, because why would a guy who was looking at apartment ads and colleges suddenly decide he's gonna deceive and scare the shit out of his family by faking a kidnapping?

The only good thing about this situation was since Bobby and I were alone, I at least got to know him better. And I could definitely see now why Dad and Sam loved him so much. He was pretty awesome. Gruff of course, but loveable, and he obviously doted on Dad and Sam.

And surprise surprise, I actually did what Dad said this time- And didn't try to run away.

It was after the first few days did things suddenly turn all the more weird. I was sitting in the kitchen clicking around on Sam's laptop that he left behind, trying to find any kind of info I could on... _Anything_. But since I didn't know what to look for it was kind of impossible and pointless. I was mainly driving myself crazy, because since I wasn't with Dad to help him out, I wanted to at least find something that might give us a lead somewhere. That's when my phone rang.

At a quick glance I didn't recognize the number, but answered anyhow.

"Hello?"

"Mary?" It was Sam.

"Sam?! Oh my god, where the hell are you?" I shrieked back.

Bobby heard me and rushed into the kitchen, but I held up my hand to keep him from talking.

"Listen, Mary-" Sam went on, and I couldn't help but notice he sounded remarkably calm, considering. "I need you to do me a favor, okay?"

"Uh, Sam- Where are you? Are you okay, did whatever took you hurt you?"

"I don't have time for questions," He sighed. "Look, I need you to tell Dean to back off and stop looking for me, will you do that please?"

"Excuse me?" I sat up straight. "Are you fucking nuts?"

"Just do it, Mary! I'm perfectly fine, I'm not hurt, I wasn't abducted- I'm _fine_."

I jumped at his raised voice, and it didn't sound to me that he was fine at all.

"What'd you mean you weren't abducted, what was up with your smashed phone and wrecked motel room then?"

"I, uh... Well, I realized something and I knew I needed to take off. There's some things I gotta do and I have to do it alone. So tell Dean to back off and stop looking for me."

My eyes fell up to Bobby's and he must've read my expression because he grabbed the phone from me.

"Where are you, boy? What's goin on?" Now I studied _his_ expression and I was pretty sure it was the same as mine. Completely clueless. "Don't you pull that crap with me you idjit, you're not too big yet for me to kick your ass." His clueless didn't last long before it turned to being pissed off. "Right, well if you know me or your brother then you know that ain't gonna happen, so if you're so dead set on runnin off then you better get a nice head start, cause Dean's gonna be gunnin after you." I heard Sam scream something intangible over the other line before hanging up and Bobby finished with another "Idjit." Before handing me back my phone.

"Well?" I followed as he stomped back to his desk. "What'd he say?"

"Same crap he flung at you I gather," He answered. "Call your Dad, tell him what's goin on and then we gotta track Sam's number and find out where the hell he's hiding."

So I jumped on that and called Dad, and let's just say that if Sam had been standing right in front of him, he'd of probably punched him. The last thing Dad said before hanging up was that he was gonna track the fucker down and put a boot in his ass. Things just kept getting weirder and weirder.

* * *

Dean had grabbed whatever he thought was needed and was ready to leave the motel he was hauled up in when there was a knock at the door. He instinctively drew his gun from his jacket and inched slowly and quietly over to the peephole and took a quick glance.

"What the hell..." He muttered then ripped the door open to find Sam standing there. "Dude, where the fuck have you been?"

"Hey, Dean," Sam nodded. "Can I come in?"

Dean stuffed his gun back in his jacket and didn't quite know what to say. "Uh, yeah... Only if you're gonna tell me what the hell's goin on?"

Sam pushed past him and took a seat at the table. "I gotta make this as short as possible, I don't have a lot of time. So all I'm gonna say is that I'm fine, and I need you to trust me. Something came up and it's pretty big and I have to take care of it myself."

"What's that supposed to mean? What turned up?" Dean flopped down across from him, and couldn't help but notice how stiff Sam seemed to be, he was on edge- Almost as though he expected someone to be watching or listening to their conversation.

"All I can say is that I might've found a way of helping Mary out of her deal, but it can only work if I do it myself. So you have to turn around and go back. Leave me alone and let me handle this, okay?"

It didn't take long for Dean to come the conclusion that something was seriously wrong with his brother. He could see it in his eyes.

"And, uh- Just exactly how did you come up with a way of getting her outa her deal, huh?" Dean questioned, raising both brows. "Especially since the way you left our room back there, it looked like a struggle had gone down, so explain that one, Sammy?"

Sam sighed, moving his eyes to the table. "That was a misunderstanding. Obviously I wasn't roughed up or abducted," He rose his arms. "Here I am free and clear to do whatever the hell I want."

"And just to make sure I'm getting this- What you wanna do is take off and pursue some supposed way of getting Mary out of her deal?" Sam nodded in answer. "And what makes you think that I'm just gonna sit back and let you do that on your own? Cause you know, Mary's _my_ daughter so if it's true you got some way of ending her deal then I want in on it."

"Dean, you can't be in on it. It's gotta be me that does it. That's the arrangement."

"Arrangement? And who did the arranging?"

Sam gave his usual bitch face before averting his eyes out the window. "Someone that knows a little bit about this kind of thing. And the reason why you can't help me is because we made a deal, remember? You and me? We said that if everything worked out that you were gonna leave the life with Mary, take her somewhere safe and live some normal apple pie life, right? So, let me handle this. I owe her this, Dean. I mean, my god, I fucking shot her and killed her- Not to mention that the poor kid's come back here and endured all sorts of painful crap just to save our asses. So, just let me do this and don't fight me. You do your job of protecting your daughter and I'll fix the rest."

Dean ran his hand down his face and sat back, shaking his head. "If this thing is legit, and you really _can _get her out of her deal then we're gonna have to put the normal life on hold right now, Sam."

"Okay, yeah you do that. Let Mary back in on all of this dangerous shit and risk her getting hurt or killed again. That makes perfect sense, Dean. Can't you just trust me _once _to help, and let me do something for _you_? I can handle it, I'm not stupid. So just go back to Indiana with Mary, get a normal job and a normal house and fucking live in it, got it? I can do this."

Every instinct was telling Dean something was wrong with this situation, it was obvious.

"What's with all those other hunters going missing just like you did?" Dean went on.

Sam furrowed his brows, giving a halfhearted shrug. "I don't know. I haven't heard anything about that."

"You expect me to believe that, Sam? Something's going on and whatever it is, you're holding it back. So, if you really want me to go back with Mary and leave you alone then be straight with me. What's going on?"

After a long drawn out sigh, Sam pushed himself away from the table and stood. "I told you- I'm trying to help. And I don't wanna fight with you about this, or remind you for the millionth time that I'm an adult and you don't have to chase after me or watch my ass anymore. You can bitch at me all you want but it doesn't matter, I'm doing this without you. So just do us both a favor and go back to Mary."

And Dean wasn't even allowed the chance to respond before Sam stomped to the door and left. He followed him enough to see him jump in a black Dodge Charger, then peeled out of the drive. Naturally he was gonna jump in the Impala and chase after him, but couldn't and he felt his blood boil when he noticed Sam had slashed his tires.

"Son of a bitch..." Dean muttered. "What the fuck is goin on with you Sammy?"


	38. Chapter 38

_**So this is what's considered the second part of this story. I've been on a writing frenzy lately and can't stop popping out chapters lol**_

* * *

Dad wasn't taking heed of Sam's advice, or whatever you wanted to call what he said. After Dad had called and told me and Bobby what happened, we were both equally gobsmacked. I might not've been present to hear what all Sam said- But I knew that whatever it was that got to him had fucked with his head. Yeah, I'll admit that Sam had made some hasty decisions in the past, and he'd actually run off on Dad a couple times too- But this was different. Supposedly it involved my deal, but if that was what was really motivating Sam's actions, he should've known that Dad would never walk away from something like that. And he was... Well he was stupid to think that any of us would just sit back and live a normal life while he was out there doing god knows what.

So yeah, no one knew what to think- Cas wasn't answering mine or Dad's prayers, so we had no chance of him tracking Sam down. Bobby was working overtime reading through his books trying to see if there really could've been some niche in my deal that Sammy might've caught wind of. Dad, well- He was still trying to chase Sam down and drag his ass back home. But ever since he'd slashed the Impalas tires he'd completely vanished, somehow.

Dad was gone two friggin weeks when Sam called me yet again- Pretty much spouting the same crap he did the last time. To tell Dad to back the fuck off, that he was only causing problems in what he was doing, and that he wasn't gonna be able to find him. Naturally I relayed that message to Dad, which resulted in another slew of curses that would make a sailor blush. Basically no one knew what the fuck to do about this. Sam apparently wasn't in any danger, at least we guessed he wasn't. It seemed like he really was making his own choices in doing whatever the hell he was doing- So, after those two weeks went by Dad pretty much didn't have a choice but to come back to Bobby's.

He claimed it was because Sam was a big boy, a big stupid boy, but an adult that could do whatever he wanted nonetheless. And he had to watch out for me, and leaving me with Bobby for two weeks pretty much went against what he believed in. He was comparing himself to his own Father, and the way he'd ditch him and Sam with random people and staying gone for weeks at a time. He felt guilty for it, I knew he did.

We spent a couple more days at Bobby's before jumping in the Impala.

For a few long minutes Dad only sat there, refusing to start the engine before turning and looking at me.

"Mary, I'm letting you decide what we're gonna do... Do you wanna go back to the bunker, or... Go back to Indiana?" He asked.

And by going back to Indiana he was basically asking if I cared if we went back for Lisa. And for a split fraction of a second I wanted to tell him I wanted to go back to the bunker. I didn't wanna live in Indiana, I didn't wanna deal with Lisa and her son. Not because I was jealous... Okay, maybe I was a little bit, but that wasn't the main issue. The main issue was because of that god damned feeling in my gut that told me things were gonna majorly fuck up if we did it. But, I wanted to be supportive, I wanted to be a good daughter and not a selfish one.

"We can go back to Indiana," I said, sighing as I avoided his stares. "If that's what you want."

He swallowed once over, seeming to study my expression. I guess I carried whatever I was feeling on my face, just like he did.

"Are you sure? Cause if you don't think you'll be happy there..."

"No," I smiled at him. "I think it can be good, Dad- Really. Like you said, don't knock it til you try it, right?"

He smiled back, and going by the creases that formed around his eyes I knew it wasn't fake.

"Right." He said, then finally started the car and peeled outa the drive.

So, that's that I guess. The normal life for us. Honestly I wouldn't have minded it so much if it was just us. Meaning, Dad, Sam, Cas and me. Not strangers. But I settled for it because what other choice did I have? Sure I could tell Dad the truth, that I wasn't so cool with it- But what would that lead to? Dad being unhappy, and maybe resenting me later for possibly taking away something that could've been good for him.

I settled in for what was gonna happen next. And when we got to Indiana, for the first couple weeks we crashed in our usual crappy motel- Until Dad, get this, Dad went out and got a job... Yeah, a job- Which pretty much blew my mind. He was working for a construction company, which was actually the last place I expected him to work. I figured it'd be more along the lines of a garage working on cars. But the pay was good, and he actually seemed to like it. After another couple weeks he had enough paycheck, and our money we had saved up anyhow, to shell out a deposit and first months rent on an apartment.

Him and Lisa were hitting it off, obviously. And during the moments I actually relented and went with them, Ben and me got along pretty good. He was actually a cool kid, and I still wasn't sure if he was my brother or not, but overall everything was okay. We did "normal" things, like going to movies and out to eat, a couple times we went bowling or played mini golf. Okay if I have to be honest it was the weirdest fucking thing and I didn't know what to think of it. But, I faked being happy. I faked it for Dad, because in all the time I'd known him, future and past, I don't think I'd ever seen him like this. Maybe I was wrong in thinking that having me was enough for him- Obviously there was more that he wanted out of life than just a daughter and hunting.

After two months of being in Indiana we left our apartment and moved in with Lisa and Ben. Naturally I offered to not go, and that I could just stay in the apartment, but Dad wouldn't let me. He also wouldn't let me go out and get a job yet- He claimed he wasn't ready for that and he wanted me where he knew I'd be safe.

So, we moved in with them- And I'd be lying if I said Lisa was cool with having me there. She didn't understand why Dad wanted his sister there at all times, why he was so protective over me, and why he wouldn't let me get a job to pay my own way. I'd also be lying if I said I liked her, and we got along. Because we didn't. During the day when Dad would be working, and Lisa wasn't, I spent the majority of my time locked in my room because she made it pretty clear that she didn't want me around.

It'd been two months and we hadn't heard from Sam, but for a random text every now and then letting us know he was still alive and wasn't in any danger. And it'd been even longer than that since I'd seen or heard from Cas. I know he said he'd try to jet on down here every now and then, but he obviously couldn't.

Dad and Ben were pretty much joined at the hip. They played baseball together, he helped him with his homework as best as he could, they played video games and watched movies together and I didn't complain. I didn't say a word, and when he'd ask me to join them I'd decline because I didn't want to get in the way. Since I didn't have a job and was at home the entire time with nothing to do, I secretly searched online for any weird things going on out in the real world. If I came across anything fishy, I'd send that info to Bobby. So yeah, I might not have been hunting anymore and living "normally", but that didn't mean I was happy about it. If Dad knew what I was up to he'd be pissed- Even though he couldn't say he was out one hundred percent either. Because he was still trying to figure a way out of my deal. He'd come home from work, eat dinner, and then spend the rest of the night online tapping and clicking away. No shit he hadn't found anything, because there _wasn't _anything.

So... This was life now. Our life...

I didn't like it. I was lonely, I missed Dad and Sam. I missed Cas. I missed Bobby. I missed the way life used to be. And still, I repeat, I said nothing. I never once complained and held it all in. Fake smiles and laughter, pretending to have fun when we got invited to neighbors barbecues seemed to do the trick. Dad didn't suspect a thing.

I didn't even say a word when Dad forgot my birthday. I mean, I could hardly expect for him to remember it, right? It's not like he'd raised me or cared about that kind of thing, right? Still, I guess it was kinda stupid of me to wake up that morning and expect for him to mention it.

"What day is this?" Lisa said, breaking through my thoughts. "I have an appointment on the fifteenth."

Dad glanced at the calender on the fridge as he scrambled some eggs. "Uh, it's the fourteenth."

Lisa nodded and jotted something down in her address book. "I still need to go over everything with the insurance, since Mary's being added to it." She paused and looked at me, giving the usual fake smile she always flashed at me whenever Dad was around. "Okay, so you're twenty two right?"

I swirled my o.j, then shook my head. "No, twenty three."

She nodded and jotted that down too and I noticed Dad had turned away from the stove and furrowed his brows at me.

"Uh, twenty three?" He asked.

"Yeah... Birthday was on the fifth." I answered.

And Dad looked like someone just kicked him square in the nads after that.

"Really?" Ben said, taking time from snarfing down his cereal to gawk at me. "Why didn't you say anything then, we could've thrown a party."

I slid off the bar stool, grabbed my juice and said before leaving. "I'm not much for parties."

My bedroom was the only one downstairs- It had previously been an office or something, I don't know, but I was thankful to have my own bathroom. And overall my room was nice. Nice bed, nice furniture, nice view of the backyard- But I didn't feel at home there. I was used to the bunker. The cold concrete walls, the cold floors and dull lighting. This place was just too bright and airy.

I rifled through my drawers long enough to grab my clothes for the day before there was a knock on my door.

"Yeah." I called out and Dad peaked in at me.

"You busy?" He asked.

"No," I shook my head and closed my drawer with a little too much enthusiasm. "What's up?"

He stepped in and closed the door behind him. "Mary... Shit... I'm sorry. I'm sorry I forgot your birthday, kid."

"It's okay, it doesn't really matter." I replied, avoiding as best as I could at looking at him.

"Yeah it does. Damn, I feel like shit now. Especially since you remembered mine."

"It's not a competition, Dad. It's just like any other day, so... Don't worry about it."

He moved closer and shook his head. "It's not just any other day. And of course I'm gonna worry about it, so... What can I do to make it up to you, huh?"

It was taking every ounce of strength I had to keep myself from answering that honestly. And to keep myself from crying and forcing off that damned fake smile I'd mastered lately.

"Nothin, really it's not a big deal. It's not like we ever really did anything in the future either. Birthdays weren't anything really." I said.

"What about birthday pie and beer, huh?" He smiled slightly but it seemed it was just as fake as mine. "We can do that when I get home tonight."

"You're supposed to go on a double date with Lisa's friends tonight," I reminded. "Seriously, Dad. I'm fine. It's not a big deal."

He sighed and ran his hand back and forth through his hair.

"Fuck..." He walked over and gave me a tight hug and I nearly lost it. "I'm sorry, Mary. I promise next year I won't forget it."

Next year... Yeah I highly doubted I'd still be here next year...

After the millionth fake smile just that morning, I nudged him playfully.

"I need to take a shower and you gotta go to work, remember?"

He nodded and left my room, his posture bent and shoulders slumped. Maybe he did feel bad about forgetting, I dunno. But I couldn't let myself think of that right now.

"Cas," I said, biting back tears. "I hope you're doing better up there than I am down here."

It was after I'd grabbed my clothes and a fresh towel did I remember that I'd left my phone out on the bar. I liked to keep it with me at all times cause sometimes Bobby would call and let me know what he'd found out on what I figured might've been a case. And since I didn't want Dad knowing what I had been doing behind his back, I didn't want to risk him answering it. So I slipped out of my room and started back for the kitchen when I heard Lisa's voice over the air.

"She's a big girl, Dean," She said. "It might be different if she was Ben's age and you forgot her birthday, but she's twenty three."

Yeah, say that if he forgot yours you shrew, I thought.

"You don't get it, Leese-" Dad replied. "It's important."

"I'm not saying it isn't. But if she was really upset about it don't you think she would've mentioned it?"

"Nope, you don't know the kid like I do. She'd never bring that up."

"Look I know you're close with your sister but we made these plans weeks ago, and I haven't seen Carly since college. We can't cancel just so you can eat pie with your sister."

Okay fuck this shit. If Lisa hated me then I wish she'd just flat out say so already- Instead of faking pleasantries when I was around, and then trying to play the concerned girlfriend while subtly trying to coax Dad into ditching me when my back was turned.

"Well you could go without me just once, right?" Dad sighed.

"We've already made the reservations and Tom was looking forward to getting your take on construction. Since they're moving here he..."

"Yeah," Dad interrupted. "I get it."

"Maybe you could do it tomorrow?" She suggested. "No, wait I forgot- Ben's ball game is tomorrow and then you promised you'd take him to see that movie."

I could see Dad's reflection in the mirror from the hallway where I was lurking. He was leaning against the counter with his arms crossed and eyes glued on the floor.

"I'll ask her to go with us tomorrow then. Maybe she'd be up for it."

I could also see Lisa and her face was none too happy.

"Okay you can do that sure. But we haven't been together long, Dean. I don't think it's too much to ask that we spend time alone. At least until Ben's completely comfortable."

Dad rose his eyes and I could see his face scrunch.

"Lisa, why're you trying to exclude Mary from everything we do?"

"I'm not," She slammed the fridge door closed. "I just feel that a twenty three year old woman shouldn't be so dependent on her brother. She's not a child, but Ben is, and you're the only Father figure he's ever had. This is important to me, Dean. I want this to work."

Well I had enough of that, so I slithered back to my room and closed the door.

Not trying to exclude me, my ass. She fucking was and I seriously hoped that Dad was just clueless or else that'd mean he was letting his girlfriend boss him around and treat his kid like crap.

Well I guess my sixth sense was accurate yet again. I knew this wasn't gonna work and someone was gonna wind up being miserable. I guess if was just better that it was me and not Dad.

* * *

The rest of the day wasn't much better and was basically the same as every other day since we came here. Dad came home from work, took a quickie shower and within fifteen minutes was dressed in a nice suit and following Lisa out the door. I was in charge of babysitting Ben, and we spent the majority of the hours playing x-box and watching Adult Swim. At least the kid didn't hate me.

Dad and Lisa didn't get home til after midnight, and I was thankful that I could finally go to bed and try to forget this crappy ass day.

When I heard my phone buzzing from my nightstand, and after a groan I rolled over- Noticing it was three in the friggin morning.

"Ugh, who the fuck's calling me?" I mumbled, then grabbed the phone.

I didn't recognize the number right off, but answered anyways.

"Yeah?" I garbled.

"Mary?" It was Sam. "Hey, you uh... You busy?"

"Busy? What the fuck, Sam? It's three in the morning, I was sleeping."

"Oh, right... Sorry- Look, I kinda... Need some help."

Sitting up, I rubbed my head and couldn't help but notice that he sounded out of it.

"What's goin on? Are you okay?"

"Uh," He chuckled, but it didn't sound amused. "No... Not really. I'm tore up pretty good."

"What?" Okay now I was awake. "Where are you? What happened?"

"Long story. I'm about two hours from you guys, can you come?"

"Yeah, I'll go wake up Dad..."

"No," He had a coughing fit after that. "You can't tell Dean. Just you, you come alone."

After kicking the blankets off I rolled outa bed and grabbed my shoes, threw them on and started out my bedroom door.

"Why do I have to come alone, Sam? What's goin on?"

"Just come, I'll text you the address."

Now he hung up on me, and I needed to figure out what the hell I was gonna do in the next ten seconds. If I didn't tell Dad and something went wrong, he'd never forgive me- And then if I did tell him and he showed up with me, Sam would've been pissed and wouldn't trust me again.

Fuck it, it wasn't worth Dad hating me, so I started up the stairs and stopped outside his and Lisa's room.

I knew better then to burst in without knocking, but it was pretty damn quiet in there so I didn't have to worry about walking in on something gross. The door was unlocked so I pushed it open quietly and peaked my head inside. They were both asleep of course so I tiptoed to Dad's side of the bed and nudged him slightly.

He wasn't a sound sleeper, not at all, the least little noise or jolt would wake him up so his eyes shot open and he glared up at me.

"Jesus, Mary," He whispered. "What's wrong?"

I motioned for him to follow me instead of speaking, and after grabbing his t-shirt and throwing it on he met me in the hallway.

"Sam called me," I said, still minding my tone. "He said he's hurt really bad and wanted me to come help him. He told me not to tell you."

"The fuck..." His arms fell limply at his sides. "Where is he?"

After checking my phone I held up the text he sent. "Two hours from here apparently."

He returned to his room long enough to grab his jeans and shoes, then flew down the stairs with me following. The keys to his truck were hanging by the backdoor so he grabbed them and we left without bothering to wake up Lisa. I drove while he tied his shoes in the passenger seat, and once we were out of the neighborhood he tried calling Sam but there was no answer.

"Did you try Cas?" He asked, opting now for texting his brother instead of calling. Still he got no response.

"No, not yet. I didn't figure he'd answer me, Dad."

"Yeah... He's been swamped upstairs. Still, couldn't hurt to try, right?"

I nodded and said a silent prayer to Cas telling him where we were going and what was happening. I didn't expect Cas to hear it, who the hell knows what was going on up there that was keeping him so preoccupied he couldn't even answer prayers anymore. Yeah I knew it was the war against Raphael but that didn't give me much info. He wouldn't have went into detail I'd bet if he ever decided to come back, mainly because he knew it would scare the hell out of me.

"Fuck, he's still not answering-" Dad snapped, after trying to call again. "Step on it, Mary."

I laid on the gas and thankfully the roads were pretty much abandoned this late at night so I wouldn't have to worry about getting pulled over.

"Why exactly would he call you and not me?" He asked. "Is he trying to hide something?"

"I have no idea. I still don't get why Sam decided to keep on hunting after we left."

It had been three months since Sam took off without so much as an inkling of a clue as to why he did it. The only thing he'd say was that it was just something he had to do. As if that was explanation enough. Yeah he said he was trying to get me outa my deal, but somehow I figured that was bullshit.

"I don't get it either," Dad finally replied. "When we talked about leaving the life he said he was gonna leave it with us. Then suddenly out of no where he just takes off, leaves the motel ransacked and doesn't think it'll freak us out? I dunno, Mary-" He shook his head. "Something's goin on with him."

"No shit," I sighed. "If I didn't know for sure it wasn't that, then I'd say he was acting like he did when he didn't have a soul."

"That ain't possible. We dodged that bullet, thank god."

"Yeah... Maybe he got roped into it somehow? Maybe somethin from his past caught up to him?"

Dad's jaw clenched, and I could see in the darkness as did his fists. "If that's it I don't know what'd it be. Unless there's something that happened that I don't know about. Sammy had a tendency to hold thing back from me before you showed up. Hell, maybe even he still did it after you got here, I just don't know anymore."

Neither did I. In my opinion it seemed like Sammy and Dad had a better relationship after I came here, then from the stories future Dad always told me. They didn't fight constantly like they did in the stories I knew, everything was pretty much peaceful. Sure, they'd bicker cause that's just what siblings do when they're stuck with each other for such long periods of time- But they didn't full on blow up at each other.

"So," Dad was changing the subject to avoid worrying about Sam, I could tell. "We don't really get a chance to talk much anymore, so I don't even know what you think about our situation."

"Situation?" I retorted.

"Yeah... Are you happy? You know, living with Lisa and Ben?"

Fuck... I was hoping he wouldn't ask me that question. I was hoping my fake smiles would be enough to deter him from actually asking it. I didn't wanna have to tell him that Lisa didn't like me, and she made it evident pretty much constantly when he wasn't around.

"Of course," I lied- Because I had to. Dad was happy, and that's all that mattered. "It's weird, I'm not gonna lie, and I'm still not used to it really- But yeah... It's pretty cool."

He eyed me closely, and I tried to ignore it by keeping my attention on the road.

"You sure about that? Cause if there's a problem you can tell me. You know that, right?"

"I know, Dad-" I passed another fake smile. "But there isn't a problem."

Of course there was a problem. There was a million problems. Sam was acting like a weirdo, being secretive and doin god knows what out on his own, Cas was fighting a deadly battle in heaven and I never saw him anymore- And Dad's girlfriend hated me. Not only that, but since we moved in with them I was seeing him less and less. We never spent any time together, and I was starting to feel like the third wheel no one wanted around. I know he wasn't doing it on purpose. He was occupied with his new job, his girlfriend and almost step-son. It's just, my entire fucking life the only person I could rely on one hundred percent was Dad. No matter what, he was always there for me. Now that that was suddenly taken away from me, I didn't know how to react. Yes, I was an adult and I shouldn't have been such a big fucking baby about it, but I couldn't help it.

I missed him. I missed Cas and Sam- I missed the way things used to be.

"Mary," Dad was still eying me. "Come on, you think I'm not gonna notice there's something up? Just be honest and tell me what's wrong."

I forced back tears, trying to cough them away. "I, um... Well I was doin some thinking..."

"About?" He replied, his brows furrowed.

"Well, I'm twenty three now, I'm not a little kid anymore. And, let's be honest- I'm just getting in the way there, so... I was thinking maybe I should move out."

I tried to avoid the devastation on his face after I said that.

"Hell no you're not moving out, Mary. Are you nuts?" He snapped.

"Dad, think about it... You've got a new life now and an _actual _kid to look after. Having me there is just gonna hold you back. Eventually Lisa's..."

"Lisa?" He interrupted. "Did she say somethin to you? Is that it?"

"No," I lied again. "I'm just thinking about you. And having me there is gonna keep you from being completely happy. You won't be able to do what you want. And you gotta admit it's awkward going around saying I'm your sister, right? So, I just think it's better if I get my own place somewhere."

"That was your deal, not mine-" He replied. "You're the one that said you were my sister."

"But you went along with it," I returned, looking at him long enough to see his face go flat. "You knew just as much as I did that Lisa wouldn't understand if you told her I was actually your daughter, it would only cause problems."

His lips flattened. "Hey, I'll go back tonight and tell her the truth if that's what you want. The last thing I want is you thinkin I'm ashamed of you or something, or maybe embarrassed, cause that sure as hell ain't it."

"Yeah, okay- You go back and tell her you lied to her from the get go, Dad. That's gonna go over really well. She already has issues with where we came from and what we used to do. If you go and tell her I'm your daughter from the future, what'd you think's gonna happen?" He sighed after that. "This isn't gonna work, and you know it. I can't stay there, Dad... That's not my life, it's yours."

"You're my life too, Mary!" He shouted. "You're my daughter, and we agreed we'd do this together, don't you dare go and bail on me already dammit. Not you too."

"I'm..." Great, now I was definitely gonna cry. "I'm not bailing on you, Dad. I just want you to be happy."

"Then don't even fucking think about moving out, got it? Cause if you do, that's not gonna make me happy, kid." He watched me brush a tear away. "Okay?"

I nodded. "Okay, I won't... But, what're you gonna do about this whole sister thing?"

"I told you," He said. "I'll tell her the truth tonight."

"You can't..."

"Better to do it early then wait around and maybe years go by, right?"

"No." I shook my head. "You can't tell her. It wouldn't work. I don't want you to tell her."

Which was of course, another lie. I wanted him to tell her the truth, I wanted her to know that I was more important to him then Lisa thought. But, this was better for him.

"You sure?" He went on. "Cause I got no issues with doin it, Mary."

"Nah," I shrugged. "Why risk a fight or something, it's cool."

I don't think he believed me, but right at the moment he wasn't gonna argue. I think maybe in a way he knew I was right, and if he told Lisa now and let her know he'd been lying to her- It would fuck everything up. Some might think it was a chicken shit kinda thing to do, risking my feelings just so his girlfriend wouldn't get pissed at him, but... I let it slide, because he finally had something good. And it would be an even bigger chicken shit thing to do for me to risk that just because my feelings were hurt.

We fell silent for a few minutes before he cleared his throat.

"No, I'm... I'm gonna tell her, Mary." He said quietly. "It's the right thing to do."

"Dad," I barked back. "I don't want you to. Really, I'm cool with things the way they are. Honestly, it's just fucking weird the reactions we get when people actually learn the truth. I don't like the looks we get. It's easier just to keep the story this way. Let people believe I'm your sister."

He sighed and laid his head on the headrest. "I don't care about weird, or the looks we'd get."

"Yes you do. I saw the way you acted when you first introduced me to Bobby. You stuttered and were embarrassed cause you didn't know what to say, or how he might react to it." I forced down another knot. "Besides, I know what the issue is this time anyways. It's not that you're worried she'll get pissed at you, or that she'll think it's weird. It's because if she finds out that seventeen years from now you have a daughter with some random bimbo- That'll tell her that whatever you guys got now doesn't last."

His eyes shifted to me, and his face was still as flat. "I already know it ain't gonna work, obviously. It can't if I have any hope of you coming along later."

"Worst case scenario-" I said, brushing away another tear. "It does work out, and I'm not born, at least you'll have this life here. You can be happy."

His eyes rolled and he shook his head. "I hate your fucking logic, Mary. You think that after all this that I'd be fine with you never being born? You don't know me very well then."

We fell silent again for the remainder of the drive, until pulling into an overgrown drive that led to an old dilapidated house.

"This is where he's at?" He asked, leaning forward. "What the fuck..."

"I dunno." I replied, then cut the engine.

He led the way up the rickety front porch steps, noticing the door was slightly ajar.

"Sammy?" He called out. "We're comin in, don't shoot us!"

After he pushed the door open fully, he waved for me to follow and we stepped inside. It was dark as hell in there, what little light came from holes in the roof and the moonlight peaking through. Still, halfway down a hallway we both stopped once we noticed blood droplets leading to another partially open doorway.

"Shit." Dad muttered, then kept on moving.

He pushed the second door open and flicked on a flashlight, shining it around the room- Stopping once we noticed a slumped over figure partially hidden behind a busted desk.

"Sam?" Dad said, then darted for him.

Sam was partly out of it, holding a gaping wound in his stomach. Once he woke up enough to see Dad, he started grumbling.

"Thanks a lot, Mary." He said. "Thought we had a deal?"

"Sorry, Sam-" I replied, crouching down and holding the flashlight while Dad checked on him. "You shoulda known better than to think I'd agree to that."

"What the fuck happened, Sam?" Dad asked, bringing out the first aid kit he'd brought from the truck.

"I don't know," Sam answered, cringing in pain. "Something went wrong, I guess."

"Mary," Dad nudged me. "Call Cas, get him to come down here. This isn't something we can fix."

Sam seemed to perk up after Dad said that, which was odd. But I nodded and moved to a quieter section of the room and let out a deep breath.

"Cas," I said. "Look I know you're probably waist deep in shit up there, but we really need you down here. Something happened to Sam, he's really hurt and..."

I didn't even finish my sentence when I heard a flapping of wings behind me. I turned quickly expecting to see Cas, and instead I saw a blonde haired woman in a gray pants suit.

"What is it you need?" She asked, sighing. "Castiel is indisposed, currently fighting a battle, he can't come so he's asked me to help."

"Who the fuck are you?" Sam snapped angrily. "We called for Cas, not you."

"I'm Rachel-" She answered. "Now I've come here to assist you, if you don't want that..."

"No, wait," Dad said. "We do, don't listen to him- He's lost a lot of blood and ain't thinkin straight. Can you just fix him please?"

Her face remained harsh, but she stomped forwards anyhow and pulled Sam's shirt open, inspecting the wound.

"This is self inflicted." She stated, then reached down and pressed her fingertips on his forehead- He healed instantly.

"Self inflicted?" Dad spat. "Bullshit, you're wrong."

"I don't care what you believe, but it's self inflicted. The next time you have a so called emergency, make certain it's not a suicide attempt. Castiel doesn't have the time to deal with nonsense like this."

Sam sat up after his wound was healed and rubbed his head. "It was an accident, a stupid accident- It's not like I did it on purpose."

"That's not my concern, now if that's all you need..." She stood.

"Well wait a fucking second!" I barked. "Can't you at least tell us how Cas is doing?"

She swung around and glared at me. "And he certainly doesn't have the time to deal with your emotional nonsense either. Castiel is in war, think of that the next time you whine to him about your issues."

And then she zapped away, and I was left standing there with my blood boiling.

"Wow... What a bitch." Dad said, then helped Sam to stand. "Okay, so. What the fuck happened, Sam? You're not an idiot, how the fuck did you manage to stab yourself in the gut like that?"

Sam stood tall, his expression was blank but for what looked like anger in his eyes.

"Don't ask, I was fighting off a... A vamp, and- Well he got the jump on me. Really, it was a stupid accident and I feel like an idiot enough already." He answered.

Dad turned a small circle, then threw up his arms. "Okay, where is this vamp then, huh? You got him, right? Took off his head?"

"Yeah, he's dead, Dean- No doubt about that."

"Then where's his body?" I asked now. "The only blood in this place is yours, Sammy."

Sam sighed. "I didn't kill him here. I was driving after I got stabbed and I thought I could make it to your place- I couldn't, I was losing too much blood so I pulled over here and then called you."

"Still haven't said why you wanted her to come here alone?" Dad went on. "Why?"

"I didn't wanna worry you, I guess. I figured Mary could come alone and call Cas down, he'd heal me and then she'd go back and you wouldn't have had to worry about it."

Dad and me exchanged glances, because it was obvious Sam was spewing out a crap ton of lies.

"Okay, well-" Dad shrugged. "Why don't you come back home with us, you can crash on the couch or something."

"No," Sam spat back quickly. "I'm good now, and... I have somewhere to be."

"Seriously?" I said. "You call me in the middle of the night with, apparently, a self inflicted stab wound in your fucking stomach and you're just gonna take off like everything's fine? What's going on with you, Sam?"

His brows rose and he shook his head. "Nothing's going on... Really, I'm fine. You guys don't have to worry and you can go home."

If I didn't know any better, if I was a paranoid and suspicious person- I would say that Sam hurt himself intentionally just to get Cas down here. His reaction to seeing Rachel was kind of incriminating. He was pissed that she had showed up instead of Cas. But, that's just crazy right? Because why would Sammy wanna lure Cas down here? Why would he risk actually bleeding to death? Why would he call only me, and insist on not telling Dad about it, because he knew that if anyone could get Cas to come down it would be me? Shit... I needed to stop thinking- My mind was spewing out all sorts of crazy whackadoo crap.

"So, yeah- I gotta take off." Sam said and started for the door. "Thanks for the help."

Dad and me gaped at each other long enough for Sam to stomp out of the room. We followed as he left out the backdoor and jumped back in his new flashy car, then sped off without another word spoken.

"I'm gonna kneecap him one of these days," Dad said. "Then maybe we could get some actual fucking answers outa him."

No kidding. Sam was already freaking me out by how weird he was acting, but now he was downright scaring me shitless. It couldn't have been that he wasn't walking around without a soul, that was impossible. So what else could it have been? He was lying, clearly, he was going off on his own and hunting, I guessed anyways- And was now resorting to actually stabbing himself just to get me and Cas alone? If I had any doubts that someone was fucking with Sam's head, they were long gone now. Because there's no way in hell he'd go and do these things on his own, someone had to be influencing him.

So Dad and me left and started back home now- Because it was clear Sam didn't want anything to do with us now that his guts weren't hanging out. And, I doubted from here on out that he'd trust me enough to call or text again. Not after I brought Dad along for the ride.

We didn't speak on the ride back, even though I could tell Dad had a lot on his mind. First me announcing that I wanted to move out, and now Sam's weirdo crap- It was hard to focus on anything else.

The two hour drive dragged by slowly, and I was actually relieved when we pulled back into the driveway of Lisa's house. It was past seven now, was light out, but I planned on sleeping the rest of the day away.

"Hey," Dad said after I opened my door. "I think we need to talk about what we're gonna do. About everything."

"Everything?"

"Yeah," He sounded so sullen now. "Not just this crap with Sam, but everything else. Mary... You never woulda said you wanted to move out unless you were unhappy here, so... What's going on?"

How was I supposed to keep faking everything if Dad kept looking at me like that? How was I supposed to pretend that I liked our life here, that I was happy, if I could barely even leave my bedroom anymore? Dad wasn't falling for it, not as much as I wanted anyways. Sure, I could keep on with the phony smile, the acting like everything was fine and dandy, but for how long? How long could I keep doin that before I was so completely miserable I just wanted to run away?

Run away... That thought didn't sound so unappealing. If I did that, Dad could just... Oh yeah right, I'd run away and Dad would be happy? Uh, no- He'd chase after me just like he did Sammy and what he had going for him here would vanish. Nope... I guess my only option _was_ just to keep faking it.

"It's not that I'm not happy," I answered. "I just figured maybe it'd be better if I was out of the way. That way you wouldn't have to juggle everything all at once. I mean, you got your new job which keeps you busy, and then there's Lisa and Ben and spending time with them. Out of everything here I'm the most disposable. Ben's just a kid and Lisa's your girlfriend-"

"So you're saying that I don't got time for you, is that it?" He interrupted.

"No," I shook my head. "That's not what I meant. I just mean that I'm not stupid or selfish, and I don't expect for you to risk losing everything else just for me."

When he spoke next, his voice was barely audible. "I would though... If you asked."

"That's the thing," I said and pushed the door open. "I'd never ask."

I left the car before he could respond, but he quickly chased after me. I'd stepped back into the house and he grabbed my arm.

"Well wait a second..." He said.

"Hey," Lisa said, coming out of the kitchen with a cup of coffee in hand. "Where were you? I woke up at six and you were gone?"

I pulled my arm free. "I'm gonna go try to catch a few hours."

And I started for my room, pausing at my door long enough to hear Dad tell Lisa that there was a situation with Sam, before I stepped inside and locked myself in the bathroom.

Splashing cold water on my face seemed to jolt me out of everything, at least for a few seconds. But right now I was basically too tired to think straight. Sleeping might help with taking my mind off of everything, at least I'd be unconscious- So I pulled the door open and froze in the doorway at seeing Cas standing in my room.

"Cas..." Was all I could manage to choke out.

I knew it was impossible but he looked exhausted. The weight of the world was _literally_ pressing down on his shoulders because of the war in heaven. Still, he offered a weak smile.

"Hello, Mary. How are you?"

My answer to that was diving on him and squeezing him so hard he'd never be able to escape, angel or not. Just as always he grunted from the impact, but held me back.

"You have no idea how happy I am to see you right now." I said, biting back tears. "You got perfect timing."

"Why?" He pulled away enough that he could look me in the eyes, and once he noticed their watery state his expression switched to concern. "What's wrong?"

"Never mind, I don't wanna talk about that. Just tell me how you are and how things are going? How long can you stay?" Yeah I wanted to bombard him with a million questions but just settled with the three.

"I'm..." He sighed and looked away. "I can't stay long. I only wanted to come and tell you that I was sorry for Rachel's behavior. She's committed to the cause I suppose, and because of that she tends to get overly defensive. Which means she has a tendency to say certain things that are inappropriate."

"Oh..." My arms fell from around him. "Well at least you got someone loyal to back you up, right?"

"Maybe so. But I didn't want you to believe that I was angry or aggravated at you requesting my assistance. Because that's certainly not true." He watched as I sat on the edge of the bed, then sat beside me. "How's Sam?"

"Fuck if I know, Cas- He's being so weird. He took off you know? Took off and ditched me and Dad. And he's been out there doing we don't know fucking what- And last night he somehow managed to stab himself in the stomach? Seriously, what the hell?"

He nodded. "Rachel mentioned that Sam had created the injury himself. Naturally I thought she was wrong, or had misconstrued the situation. I didn't believe he'd do it intentionally."

"He's starting to scare me, the way he's acting. And me and Dad don't know what the hell to do about it." Still, I shook that off. Cas had enough issues to deal with. "Anyways, how's it going upstairs?"

And that weighed down posture seemed to buckle even more, and his eyes were full of sadness.

"I wish I could say it was going well. But I don't want to worry you with my troubles, how about you tell me instead how things are going here? You were crying, Mary- Is something wrong?"

"I dunno, I guess that I-" I stopped once I noticed that expression on his face yet again. So, I suppose that meant I'd be faking everything with Cas too. He had his own shit to deal with, the last thing he needed was me bringing him down with my, as Rachel called it, emotional issues. "Everything's fine-" I smiled. "Just still trying to adjust to being normal I guess."

Faking things with Dad and faking things with Cas were two entirely different things. While they both couldn't tell my smile was mastered and phony, Dad didn't have the ability of maybe sensing my emotions or reading what was laying past my eyes. Cas did though, somehow- Even though he was clueless about a lot of things he always managed to catch when there was something wrong with me. And he clearly noticed it this time too.

"You're unhappy here... Aren't you?" He asked, slumping even further and huffing out a sigh. "I can hardly go back to heaven and the war there if I know you're down here miserable."

Fake it... Just keep on going with that, because this wasn't about me here. So I chuckled out a laugh.

"Why is it that everyone thinks I'm so unhappy? Seriously, what do I gotta do to convince you and Dad that I'm not. I am happy, how could I not be? This house is nice, everything other than Sam being a fuck wad is peaceful and good. I don't have to worry about my Dad every second. Really... It's great here."

He reached over and took my hand, pulling it to his lips and giving it a gentle kiss. "If you say so, Mary."

But he still didn't believe me, he just wasn't questioning it anymore. When his eyes suddenly fell towards the ceiling and lingered there, I knew he was probably getting some kind of message.

"You have to go?" I asked.

"Unfortunately, yes." He stood and I followed. "I'll try to not stay away as long the next time. It's hard to determine how much time has passed when I'm constantly in battle, but... It won't be several months before I come see you again."

"Don't worry about that, Cas. The last thing you need to think about while you're up there trying to stay alive is me down here. I'll be fine. Just come when you can, okay?"

I hated when he looked like a sad puppy, it only made things that much more depressing. When he kissed me goodbye I nearly lost it. The thin, thin _thin _string that was holding me together nearly snapped. He muttered something quiet under his breath after he pulled away, I think it was "I'm sorry", before disappearing.

Alone... Alone again. I guess that was something I'd have to get used to now.


	39. Chapter 39

_**I guess the good thing about being snowed in is that I write constantly lol. Thanks for all the reviews, have a platter of cookies as a token of my appreciation. :D**_

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The weeks went by so agonizingly slow and things hadn't changed at all. If anything, it was just getting worse and worse. It seemed Lisa thought I was there trying to steal all the attention away from her son, because she was desperate for her kid to have a Dad. And me, being the annoying little sister that clung to her "brother", was interfering with that. So I made sure to stay away from them as much as possible. The last thing I wanted was her thinking I was causing trouble on purpose.

On the days she wasn't working, and Dad was gone, I made sure to stay gone too. Since I didn't have a job, my days consisted of walking around town, or going to the library and researching jobs for Bobby. Jeez, I even called Sam once or twice just to hear a different voice. Not that he was happy about me calling, far from it. He was annoyed is more like it. We'd talk for a couple minutes before he'd spout something about being busy and hang up on me.

Dad was swamped with an over abundance of work that came in. Apparently the company he worked for got some contract for a housing development that was going up on the other side of town- Which meant I saw him even less than before. He was so exhausted when he came home, he managed to eat and mess around on the computer for an hour before falling asleep on the couch, or stumbling up the stairs into bed. The rest of the time when he wasn't busy, Lisa was keeping him occupied with little things around the house- Like fixing a leaky faucet, or repairing patches on the roof. When he wasn't doing chores they were taking Ben out for ice cream, or to a movie, or just hanging out for "guy time". Naturally she was allowed in on the guy time and I wasn't. Not that Dad didn't ask, because he did every single time. But how the fuck was I supposed to go when it was clear to me that I was doing nothing but causing problems? Like I'd thought a billion times since we moved in with them, I didn't want to get in the way- And I didn't want to bust into their family.

He was trying though, I could tell. He was trying his best to include me in on everything but it didn't feel right. I was starting to feel like I did in high school. Awkward and weird, a kid that stuck out like a sore thumb and couldn't blend in no matter how hard I tried. You know, the ones that always get chosen last in gym, or the one that everyone called the freak. Yeah, that was me. I might've told Dad so long ago that when I went to school it was great, I had friends and all that crap, but it was a lie. In fact, I was more like Sammy in school. I always felt like the odd ball. Which was why, whenever I'd come home from school- I'd lie to Dad and instead talk to Sam. Because I knew what would happen if Dad found out. He'd go and try to beat up the kids.

But, what was I supposed to do when the one that was making me feel that way this time around _was _Dad? What could I do when the one person I believed would never ever hurt me, was unknowingly doing that very thing? No, he didn't do it on purpose, but it was still happening.

Just as I did every morning I ate breakfast with everyone, and waited around until Dad left for work before I sneaked out the backdoor for my usual escape. I usually planned to make my way back ten minutes or so before Dad would come home. That way I could spend as much time away from the house as possible, but be back in time to kick off my shoes and relax enough that Dad wouldn't know I was gone all day.

It was nearing the end of May now, so thankfully it wasn't frigid and cold- Which meant walking around for hours wouldn't result in me freezing my nips off. Hey, at least I was getting exercise right? Of course being gone from seven in the morning until five in the afternoon could get pretty damn boring with not much to do in this fucking town. If I couldn't spend my time at the library, then I mainly lingered around Main Street and window shopped, or drank ten cups of coffee, or gorged myself on burgers from a little Mom and Pops place just on the corner. Since I was gone the majority of every day, I tried finding some kind of part time job that I could manage without Dad finding out. But no one was willing to bend to the weird hours I needed. Even something small like a coffee shop, or being a waitress at the diner wasn't gonna work. And since this town was so small I really didn't have any other options.

But today I just felt like walking, and ended up doing that for hours without even realizing it. I stopped long enough for a couple bathroom breaks, and to grab a drink and a bag of chips from a gas station, then started walking again. By the time I finally stopped and took a seat, I was on the edge of a park sitting on the top of a picnic table and staring off at the lake in front of me.

Yet again, I didn't even realize that I was there for hours, until I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket. I had set an alarm to tell me when it was time to go home, and because of my daydreaming was clear across town and wouldn't make it back before Dad without sprinting. So I took off and started running, and by the time I made it back to our neighborhood my ribs were aching. Somehow by a miracle I'd gotten home before him, which meant he probably stopped for gas or take out or something. Seeing is that it was Tuesday, which was usually pizza night, I felt a little stupid for running like a fucking lunatic. Still, I darted up the steps and flew inside, throwing off my jacket and shoes and starting for my room.

"Mary," Lisa said, stopping me just as I passed the kitchen. "Can you come in here a second?"

Great, just what I wanted right now. "Yeah, just a minute."

I threw my boots and jacket in my bedroom before returning to the kitchen. She was sitting at the bar with a cup of coffee and a newspaper in front of her, before pointing to the chair across from her.

"Take a seat, I wanted to talk to you about something."

I did as she said and sat, and my eyes immediately fell to what she'd been looking at in the paper- Which was rental ads.

"What's up?" Not that I didn't know already.

"Look, we're both adults here, right?" She started, and I nodded. "You're a grown woman, and I think it's time we settle a little issue here," Now she slammed her index finger onto the newspaper. "I think it's time that you move out, maybe find a little place of your own. I've gone through all of this and circled apartments that you might like. Ones that you could afford after you went out and found a job. I know this is a spur of the moment type thing, but one of these days you're going to have to be on your own, Mary. You can't rely on Dean your entire life."

I know I was glaring at her with dagger eyes, little did she know but I _tried_ to move out and he wouldn't let me. "Have you talked to Dean about this?"

"Not yet, but... I think he's going to agree with me." She sat back and sighed. "I know he's your brother and you two are close, but it's getting to the point where it's a little excessive."

"Excessive?" I snorted. "Since we moved in here I've made myself as scarce as possible."

"Maybe you have, but Dean's distracted. He can't focus on things he should be focusing on because he's too worried about you."

"And by _things_, you mean Ben and you?"

She nodded. "Among other things, yes. Like I said I know he's your brother, but Mary... It's a little odd, because you don't treat him like a brother. You treat him like a Father and it's disturbing. He's only seven years older than you, he's not your Dad, and you need to stop pretending that he is."

"Right," I sat back and crossed my arms. "Because I'm an adult?"

"Exactly."

"And I should just back the fuck off because he's got more important things in his life now?"

She arched a brow when she noticed my tone. "I'm not saying you aren't important too. But I think you being here is holding him back. With the life he's lived don't you agree that he deserves to be happy for once? Well, if you do, then you should want to do whatever you can to make sure that happens. And I really do think that you're holding him back." Yet again she tapped her finger on the newspaper. "I can help you find an apartment, help you get settled in. I know it might be hard on you, but in the end I think it's going to be better for all of us. Especially Dean. Like I said, he's not your Father, and you need to stop treating him like one."

How easy it would be for me to set her straight and blurt it out that, yeah, actually he was my Father. But I didn't, I kept my mouth shut.

"Leese," Dad suddenly said from the hallway, which caused me to jump and her to freeze. "What's goin on?"

Jesus, he scared the crap outa me. I didn't even hear him come in, but I think the reason for that was because I didn't latch the front door behind me. So that meant he heard everything, maybe? Going by the look on his face right then I'd say yes.

He walked into the kitchen and dropped the pizza on the counter.

"Well?" He asked, arching a brow. "What's this all about?"

Lisa sighed and folded up the newspaper. "I was just talking to Mary about..."

"Yeah I heard," He interrupted. "So how long's this been goin on, huh? How many talks like this have you two had?"

I remained silent and couldn't peel my eyes off the bar, because I couldn't stand seeing the guilt all over his face.

"I was going to tell you," Lisa sighed. "But I knew how defensive you got over this subject, so I thought I'd talk to Mary first like two rational adults hoping that she would see this is the right thing to do."

"I guess I know why, though-" Dad went on. "Cause you knew I'd object to it. I don't want her moving out, Lisa. She stays here with us. That was the deal from the get go, her and me come as a package, and you agreed so what's the problem?"

Fuck, this isn't what I wanted to happen. I didn't want them to end up fighting, maybe even breaking up because of me. Yeah I wanted Lisa to know the truth but not like this.

"Dean," I jumped from the stool. "It's cool. I get why she brought it up and I think it's a good idea. I'll start looking for a place tomorrow."

"Uh, _no _you _won't_." He glared at me with that signature Dad face. "We talked about this, Mary."

Lisa sighed and rubbed her temples. "Okay, I think this goes way past what's considered normal for a brother and sister relationship."

"Really?" Dad spat back. "Maybe that's because I'm not her brother, I'm her Dad!"

My mouth fell open slightly after he said that, and Lisa looked dumbfounded.

"What?" She chuckled. "Dean, that's impossible. I know you take responsibility over what happens to your siblings, but you're not actually their Father."

Dad sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Mary's my daughter. She's not from this time. The angel I told you about, Castiel, he sent her back to 2009. She was born in 2027. So yeah, Lisa- I actually am her Dad."

Now came the uncertainty of how she was going to react to that. Either she'd blow up at Dad for lying to her about me, or she'd think we were full of shit. Seeing is that she was looking at me with her eyes wide, I was inclined to believe she was more along the lines of flabbergasted.

"Wait a minute," She said, and yet again rubbed her temples. "She's your daughter? So you're saying that you had a daughter in the future, and she _time traveled_ back here?"

"If you knew angels as well as we did you wouldn't find that so hard to believe." Dad answered. "It's not the first time crap like this happened."

Now her expression turned harsh, and she looked at me with even more hatred then before. Shit... Dad never should've told her, it was only going to make her resent me more.

"Mary, can you give us a minute?" She asked, crossing her arms.

Yeah, I wanted to get the fuck out but I also wanted to stick around and make sure Dad was gonna be okay. He only motioned with his head for me to go, so I left the kitchen and yet again locked myself in my room.

For the next hour I sat on the edge of the bed hugging a pillow to my chest, staring at the door in anticipation. It had been pretty quiet out there, no raised voices, so I suppose that was a good sign, right? At least they weren't screaming at each other. But sometimes the silence could mean something worse off than actual screaming.

Another hour went by, and my butt was starting to fall asleep before there was finally a knock on my door.

"Yeah." I called out, and Dad didn't ask permission this time before coming in and closing the door behind him.

He sat down beside me and let out a deep sigh.

"Mary, I'm sorry-" He said. "Why the hell didn't you tell me what was goin on behind my back? You should've told me Lisa was giving you such a hard time."

A part of me wanted to say that it shouldn't have been up to me to tell him that, that he should've noticed it on his own because it was pretty fucking obvious that I was miserable. But, the other part of me knew that was irrational because Dad wasn't a fucking mind reader, and I _had_ been faking the "happy" lately.

"I didn't wanna tell you," I answered, refusing to look at him. "I didn't wanna stir up shit."

"It's not stirring up shit if you're telling the truth, and if you're so fucking unhappy that you actually wanna move out. Jesus, you shoulda known that I wouldn't have wanted this."

"Maybe, but I also know that I wanted you to be happy. And you were, so... That's all I cared about."

He fell silent for a good ten seconds before shifting to face me.

"That wasn't your call- It's not up to you to make sure I'm happy, especially if it means _you're_ not. You sacrificing your own happiness isn't something a daughter's supposed to do. That's something a Father is supposed to do for their kid." He forced me to look at him. "So, I'm gonna ask you this one more time and you're gonna be straight with me. No more bullshit. Do you wanna leave, cause if you do then spit it out and we'll go. We'll move out."

I didn't answer and instead asked, "What's goin on with Lisa? How pissed was she?"

"Pissed enough. Her and Ben are gonna stay at her sisters for a few days." He elbowed me. "Answer my question, Mary."

"Well at least she didn't throw you out." I replied, still avoiding his question.

"No, she didn't. But that doesn't mean anything. Cause if you wanna leave then we will."

"What about them?"

His fingers tapped against his knee and he cleared his throat. "Look, I was being honest when I said I'd give all this up if you wanted me to. Whether you believe it or not, you come first over anything, so I'll do what I need to do."

And, in my opinion, that was totally unfair. Yeah, maybe parents are supposed to give everything up for their children, but what if that child wasn't cool with it? What if the kid equally wanted to give up everything for the parent? Why was that considered so wrong?

"Nah," I shrugged. "It would be kinda stupid to give up only after a couple months, right? It'd make me a whiny selfish brat. We can stick it out here for a while longer, who knows- Maybe things will end up better now that the truth's out in the open."

It was a nice thought at least, but I knew better than to believe it. Still, Dad agreed we'd give it one more try and once Lisa decided to stop giving Dad the silent treatment- She came back and things resumed.

Another two weeks passed when Lisa stopped me before I could sneak out the backdoor. Going by the look on her face she still hated me just as much, hell probably even a million times more now.

"Listen," She said. "I think we can both agree that we want what's best for Dean, right?"

And I nodded, because I seemed to be the only one that gave a flying fuck about Dad's happiness. She sure as hell didn't, because if she did then she wouldn't have been treating me like dog shit. I thought maybe after she found out I wasn't actually his sister, she'd understand a little more why Dad acted like he did. Why he was so protective and scared for my safety. But, honestly, that didn't seem to matter. Dad even told her why I came back, what I'd done by selling my soul for them. She didn't understand that either, and it didn't make a difference.

"Duh," I snapped back at her. "And?"

"And, we can dislike each other all we want, but let's work something out. At least in front of Dean, let's get along, okay? There's no reason why he has to be dragged into whatever's going on between us. So, we'll be amicable, okay?"

Wow, she really really wanted Dad to stick around. Which is understandable, all single Mother's probably wanted that- But I knew what her end game was. She figured eventually I'd break down and leave, and then she wouldn't have to deal with me anymore. She could have Dad all to herself, Ben could have the Dad he always wanted and they could be a big happy family. Meanwhile, I'd be fleeing in the opposite direction.

"Sure," I shrugged. "We'll be the best of friends in front of Dad."

She flinched when she heard me call him Dad, just as she had been doing ever since the truth came out. Ya know, I didn't think it could be possible to physically hate a person so much, but it was beginning to dawn on me that she just couldn't stand me. And what sucked ass was that I wanted her to like me. When I first met her I thought maybe she could. She was nice in the beginning, until she realized Dad was including me in on everything she wanted to do. Then... Well, then came the confusion and the questioning on why a little sister was so important, why I couldn't leave the house, and why he didn't exactly treat me like a sister.

But that's what we did anyways. We were as sweet as sugar to each other in front of Dad, laughing and joking with one another. She invited me to go to movies and other places with them. Fuck, before I knew it we'd be friggin braiding each others hair and listening to sappy boy bands just so Dad would keep falling for the ruse. Which he _was _falling for, and he was actually pretty damn happy about it. He was thrilled that me and Lisa were getting along so well and told me all the fucking time. Which yeah made me feel guilty for lying to him, but it was worth it in the long run. Dad still got to have what he wanted, after all.

* * *

Sam felt the wind nipping at his back, tousling his hair into his eyes to the point he couldn't see ten feet in front of him. It had been over an hour, and still he hadn't come. To say he was impatient wasn't accurate, to say he was angry wasn't accurate either. In fact, he didn't feel much of anything anymore- And he didn't understand why. It all started that night in the motel room several months ago, and the demon that had busted in and tore the place apart. He put up as much of a fight as possible, but it didn't do any good. He was knocked out, and literally dragged from the motel and taken to a busted up and run down hospital just on the outer edges of Nevada.

That's where it all ended, or all began, he wasn't sure what to make of it anymore.

He figured that if he still had instincts, they would be screaming at him by now- Telling him that something was incredibly wrong with this situation, that he should have actually cared that he was being forced into something like this. But, that was the problem- That he just _didn't _care anymore. He also figured that something like _that_ should've affected him, but it didn't. Nothing did anymore except getting the job done.

"Sorry I kept you waiting," Crowley said from behind him, which caused Sam to turn slowly. "I've been a busy man lately, you know?"

"What is it this time, Crowley?" Sam spat back. "I did what you said and it didn't work."

"I'm well aware, it's been weeks after all." He stepped closer. "So, Mary didn't come alone, she brought dear old Daddy with her I take it?"

"Right, she told Dean- I told you she wouldn't go for the whole 'come alone' plan. And, even if she did, it wouldn't have mattered. Because Cas didn't answer the call, some angel named Rachel did."

Crowley stared off at the horizon and the flat dry field they stood in the middle of. He preferred to meet in seclusion, and Sam apparently had really taken heed of that order this time.

"He's a hard angel to come into contact with," Crowley sighed. "I'm beginning to wonder if it's even worth it anymore."

"Why do you want him anyway?" Sam went on. "It's not like he's gonna agree with everything you're doing. If anything, he'll smite your ass once he hears about it."

"You let me worry about the sloppy details, Moose-" Crowley placed his hands in his suit jacket pockets. "All you need to concern yourself with is finding a way of coaxing Castiel down, and I'll handle the rest."

Sam clenched his jaw, his cold eyes practically seared right through the demon in front of him.

"You agreed you'd tell me what was going on after that last mission. So, start explaining."

"The less you know, the better-" Crowley retorted. "Remember, after it's all over and done with everything can return to normal."

"What makes you think I _want _to go back to normal? I honestly don't give a fuck about that. I just wanna know what's going on and why you did _whatever _it was you did to me."

"Soldier recruitment," Crowley answered. "I need strong hunters without much of a conscience to get the job done. You qualified more than any of the others. Really, you should be flattered. A little modification here and there, a few sweet nothings mumbled in your ear, and it works out beautifully."

"_What _did you do to me?" Sam stepped closer, towering over him.

"Calm down, it's not attractive when your forehead does that whole-" He waved his hand in the air. "Wrinkled bit. Your job is to do what I tell you, and right now I've got another task."

Sam sighed, and had he been normal he probably would have stabbed Crowley by now. But at the moment he just couldn't be bothered to do that. If he stabbed Crowley, it meant not getting his severance pay.

"Fine," He relented. "What pointless job is it this time?"

Crowley smirked. "Cas has to show himself one way or the other. I've tried summoning him, I've tried luring him out, but I used the wrong piece of bait the last time. If anyone is going to bring that little tree topper out of hiding it's going to be Mary."

Well, Sam definitely wasn't surprised to hear that. In fact, he couldn't help but wonder what had taken Crowley so long to come to that conclusion.

He merely shrugged, not caring one way or the other. "Okay, what do I have to do?"

* * *

Sleep... Normally it came to people pretty easily. They'd lay down, close their eyes and as soon as their heads hit the pillow they'd be out like a light... Lucky bastards. Why wasn't I given that luxury? Maybe it was because my mind just wouldn't shut down, that as soon as the lights were out and I'd try to relax, there it went spinning out of control with random thoughts. In the past, it was always ways of trying to fix what went wrong with Dad and Sammy. Since we weren't hunters anymore, now it was trying to figure out a way of not flinging myself off a fucking bridge.

This sucked ass.

When I finally did manage to fall asleep, it was past two in the morning, and I was jolted awake by hearing the flapping of wings. I rolled over to see Cas sitting on the edge of my bed with his back facing me. Already I could tell he was upset over something, especially since he knew I was awake by now and hadn't spoken a word.

"Hey," I mumbled quietly, still dazed. "Is everything okay?"

And still he didn't say anything, so I kicked the covers off and crawled over to sit beside him. His eyes were fixed on the closed curtains, and I wouldn't say he looked pissed exactly, but... Mainly just at a lack for words.

"Cas?" I reached over and took his hand. "What's wrong?"

He flinched slightly, before blinking whatever he was thinking away. "This is... It's becoming clear to me that I don't believe there's a way I can stop him, Mary. I lost nearly one hundred of my soldiers today in a matter of minutes... Only minutes. That proves how much stronger Raphael is than myself." He shook his head. "Not to mention that he has a greater number of followers than I do- Especially now since I lost so many in the field today."

I didn't know what to say to that, all I could do was sit there with my heart in my throat. This was exactly why Cas decided to team up with Crowley, because he was desperate, because he didn't have any other way out.

"Cas," I finally croaked out. "What're you... What are you gonna do?"

His eyes finally worked their way to mine. "I don't know... Right now, I just... I just don't want to think about it. But you don't have to worry... I have no intention of doing what you're thinking." He swallowed hard. "Although, Crowley has been trying to find me, but I've managed to avoid him so far."

"Shit," I went completely stiff. "What're you gonna tell him if he eventually catches up to you?"

"I won't work with him, Mary. Please don't think that I would actually stoop to that level. No matter how desperate I might be, I'll never make that mistake again."

I nodded, hoping to god that he actually meant that. "How long are you staying this time?"

"I shouldn't," He replied sadly. "Honestly I shouldn't have even come, but... I needed to get away from it all."

If it were possible for angels to sleep, it looked as though he'd sleep for days. His eyes were drooped, sad and defeated- And his usual stiff straight posture was reduced to hunched over and broken. It killed me to see him that way.

"So... Are you leaving then?"

When he went silent yet again, I guess I had my answer. He knew he should leave, but couldn't actually work up the nerve to do it.

"Mary," He said. "I need to feel something different. I don't know if it's inappropriate to ask, but... Can I... Be with you? Like we had in the past?"

I didn't answer right off, which I think made him regret asking that. He must've felt he did something wrong.

"I think we're both equally damaged right now," I replied, which made his brows squeeze together in confusion. "I need to feel something different too."

Instead of giving him the chance to ask me what I meant by that, I reached over and helped him slip off his trench coat and suit jacket, then grabbed him by the collar and pulled him down to the bed with me.


	40. Chapter 40

I gotta admit that having Cas there with me, even if it was only for a short amount of time seemed to lift my spirits.

"Hold still," I chuckled. "It's been a while since I've done this."

Cas fidgeted and tried his best to stare down at my hands.

"I don't think you're tying that correctly." He stated gruffly.

"Well so sue me, I haven't tied a tie since I was like ten years old. Give me a break."

"I really can manage it myself, Mary."

"No," I tugged on it slightly. "I'll figure it out eventually."

He had no choice but to sit still and let me fiddle with his tie. I guess this was my way of delaying the inevitable, which was Cas returning to heaven. He'd been with me all night, which was the most I'd seen of him in months, and I knew once he went back it very well might be another month or more before he'd come back again. He knew I was stalling around, I could tell, but he didn't say anything. Instead he only sat there staring up at me, and at least I could say his eyes didn't seem so sad anymore- For the moment anyways.

"There," I said, tightening the tie but keeping it loose at the same time. "Done, got it. And you doubted me."

He took a quick glance before nodding. "Thank you."

"No problem." I gave him a quick kiss and jumped off his lap.

Now came the part where I pretended to do anything to keep my mind off of him leaving, which just so happened to be rifling through my dresser for clothes.

"Mary," He said, after watching me scurry everywhere. "There's something I want to ask before I leave."

I stopped and couldn't find it in me to turn around and look at him. Still, I tried to keep myself somewhat chipper sounding.

"Okay, what?"

"Last night when I came here, I assumed that you would have been different than the last time I came to see you. The last time I was here you seemed so unhappy. It's disheartening to notice that you still are. I'm not quite certain what it is that's made you so upset, so will you tell me?"

Great... I was hoping to avoid talking to him about this, because there really wasn't a way to phrase it without making myself sound like a whiny baby.

"I told you the last time, Cas- That everything's fine. I'm not unhappy." I retorted.

"And I know that's not true. I could feel it. When you and I are together..." He paused. "_Intimately_- Your guard is down, and I can sense things that I normally couldn't. So I know you're not telling me something."

Huh, well you learn something new everyday. "It's nothing you need to worry about, it's just somethin I gotta figure out on my own and work through. Really, I think it's all just in my head anyways. I over think things, or make situations out to be something it's not."

"So, you're saying that you're just being dramatic?" He squinted at me.

"Yeah," I threw my jeans down on the bed and nodded. "That's me. I'm a drama queen. Really, it's nothin you gotta worry about. Believe it or not, after last night I actually feel a lot better."

I tried smiling at him, but he obviously didn't fall for it. Seems as though my fake smiles weren't as believable as I thought they were. Wonder why it was Dad didn't seem to notice then?

"Mary... With everything that's happening in heaven, the last thing I want is knowing that you're going through some sort of pain down here- Especially since I can't be here to fix it. So please don't lie to me, and just tell me the truth so maybe I can actually be of some assistance before I leave."

Well, I suppose it was gonna come down to this sooner or later. I couldn't constantly keep all of this bottled in. And if I was gonna confide in anyone then it'd definitely be Cas.

"Alright, you win," I threw up my arms and flopped down on the bed. "Yeah, things aren't so great down here. But, I'm not gonna bitch about it too much. I'll just say is that me and Lisa don't get along very well. But it doesn't matter, cause I'm dealing."

"You're dealing?" He sat down beside me. "What exactly does that mean?"

"It means that I'm keeping my mouth shut and not causing trouble for Dad. He's happy here, he likes this life, so I'm not gonna be the asshole that goes and fucks that up." I jerked his hand. "And you can't say anything to him either, got it?"

He glared at me, his eyes narrowed. "If I feel it's necessary then of course I'll speak with him about this. But, something tells me that it's not only Lisa that's causing issues. There has to be another reason why you're so unhappy. Is Dean neglecting you?"

"Neglecting me?" I snorted. "Cas, you make it sound like I'm a little girl that can't survive without her Daddy. No, he's not neglecting me. If anything I'm the one that's neglecting him, because I'm trying to stay outa the way. Which means I don't hang around them, I don't get involved in their family time."

Now it seemed it suddenly dawned on him why I was so miserable down here. It wasn't rocket science, it was completely obvious. Anyone who knew me at all would've figured it out in two seconds. It didn't matter how old I was, whether I was an adult or not, I needed my Dad. Just like Dad needed Sammy and his family, I needed mine- And everything just felt incredibly empty if I didn't have it.

Dad always told me how hard it was on him when Sam took off to go to college and left him alone with Grandpa. He was miserable, he wanted his brother back and life just didn't quite feel the same. Then, after Sam came back when his girlfriend died and Grandpa disappeared, he said that gaping hole that was inside him suddenly vanished. Dad didn't want to be alone, family meant everything to him, and I guess that was something I inherited from him. Because I felt the exact same way. No, Dad might not have run off like Sam did, we might've been living under the same roof- But to me it felt like he was millions of miles away. And, like I said- I was used to having him there constantly- The one solid and concrete thing in my life that I could always depend on and now suddenly it felt as though that was stolen from me.

So, Cas let out a deep sigh, and even though I could tell he wanted to say something about it- He resisted for my sake.

"Then I understand," He nodded. "And if you don't want me to mention this to him, then I won't. But, if things turn even worse down here while I'm away- Then I _will_ speak with him, Mary. I have to."

Alright, then I guess that meant I had however much time it was until he visited me next to improve on my acting skills. Cause there's no way in hell I was gonna let him go to Dad and tell him any of this.

After a kiss goodbye, and him promising he'd come back to see me soon, he returned to heaven and I spent the next five minutes getting dressed and trying not to look like a sad puppy. Once I left my room and made my way to the kitchen, I noticed that Dad was already gone, but Lisa was standing at the counter going through the mail.

"Where's Dad?" I asked, as I grabbed a cup of coffee.

"He left early, he had to stop at the hardware store before going to the job site." She answered.

Well there went actually having breakfast with Dad and seeing him for longer than five minutes today. Ever since he started working on the housing development he was gone later and later each day. Sometimes he wouldn't be back until after ten, which of course by that time I would already be locked in my room.

I sat at the bar and sipped at my coffee, deciding against eating since my stomach was twisting in painful knots. Lisa finished with the mail and then started rifling through the drawer under the coffee pot, where she kept grocery money and things like that. When she suddenly slammed the drawer closed and turned and glared at me, I knew shit was about to hit the fan.

"Where is it, Mary?" She snapped.

"Uh, where's what?"

Her arms crossed and if expressions could kill I woulda dropped dead seconds ago.

"You _know _what. The money I put in the drawer for Ben's school clothes. It's gone, so where is it?"

I lowered my cup of coffee and arched a brow at her. "Wait, wait a second-" I snorted. "Are you accusing me of stealing it?"

"You're the only one who would have. Ben knows better than to touch the money in the drawer, and Dean wouldn't have taken it. So that leaves you. Where is it?"

I will not punch my Dad's girlfriend, I will not punch my Dad's girlfriend, I will not punch my Dad's fucking girlfriend!

"I didn't take your god damned money, Lisa. Did you ever consider that maybe you misplaced it?" I barked back.

"There was three hundred dollars in that drawer, I didn't misplace it. Now if I go in your room, how much do you want to bet I'll find it in there?"

"Okay you know what?" I jumped off the bar stool. "I get you don't like me, it kinda escapes me why you do exactly seeing is that I haven't done shit to you- But fine, you fucking hate me, I get it. And I don't give a flying crap if you _do _hate me, or if you call me names, or try to make my life a living hell- But I draw the line when you accuse me of stealing. Go fuck yourself Lisa."

I started for the kitchen door.

"I want you out of this house," She said before I could leave. "I have to go pick up Ben from school early, and when I get back- I expect for you to be gone."

My feet skidded to a stop and I turned to face her, giving a crooked smile.

"Fine, no problem. I'll be gone." I replied, then stomped back to my room.

I slammed my door so hard that the walls shook, and flew to my closet and grabbed my empty duffel and started throwing clothes and random things in there.

I'd hit my breaking point, honestly it was a surprise to me that I hadn't hit it sooner than this. I loved my Dad, he was the most important person in my life, but for my own personal sanity I needed to get out of there. If I didn't, there was no telling what might happen, or what I might do. A person can only take so much before they fly off the handle, and no matter how much I wanted this to work out for Dad- It clearly wasn't gonna work out for me anymore. Dad could stay here, I wasn't gonna force him to leave, or make him choose me over his new family- But there was no way in burning hell I was gonna live in this house one second longer.

I'd stuffed my duffel so full I could barely get it zipped, then went for my nightstand and grabbed my old wallet which still held a little cash.

No, I didn't fucking steal that money, no way. Honestly it wouldn't have surprised me if Lisa accused me of it and it was never missing to begin with. I just didn't know anymore. It was always something. She'd get mad at me for forgetting to put my plate in the sink, I'd sneeze too loud, I'd scratch myself, and it would set her off. But always, always- That shit happened when Dad wasn't around. Because when he was there, she was the sweetest most loving woman in the world. Talk about being two faced, it was like I was living with a monster.

I waited until I heard her car pull out of the drive before I left my room and started for the door. In a way I wished there was something I could say to Dad before I took off- A way of explaining why it was I was leaving. But I knew what would happen if I talked to him, if I saw him, he'd look at me with that crushed face and I would crumble all over again.

Before I left, I suddenly remembered... Cas, he'd be able to find me. Dad would pray to him, tell him I'd took off, and within seconds I'd be zapped back to this hell hole. I couldn't have that. So once I stepped outside, I rounded the house and busted into the garage. The Impala had been parked there since we moved in with them, covered over with a tarp. Dad just didn't wanna drive her anymore- I guess it brought back too many memories, I didn't know. But all of our old hunting gear was still in the trunk- So I popped it open and grabbed a hex bag, then left.

I didn't have a car, obviously- And I wasn't much for hitchhiking, but I couldn't steal a vehicle and I couldn't walk very far- At least not enough to get out of this town. So I guess hitchhiking was my only option.

There was a specific destination I had in mind, one that I was sure was gonna backfire on me later, but for the moment it sounded the best.

Ellen and Jo Harvelle. Since their stories didn't end the way it did before, they were still alive and well. And Bobby had told me that they opened up another Roadhouse after their other was destroyed by demons. They built it on the same property, and so I heard it was pretty much identical to their last bar. I'd never met them before, but I was hoping I could find something to do there. Maybe I'd start hunting on my own, maybe they could point me in the direction of some kind of job I could handle by myself- I didn't know. First thing's first is I was gonna get there and at least introduce myself.

Thankfully I hitched a ride with a nice old couple in a R.V that were driving across the country to Las Vegas. The Roadhouse was in Nebraska, so I'd have a full ride all the way there, thankfully. And since I offered to pay for gas, they were even more willing to let me tag along.

It was a twelve hour drive that went by so slowly I wanted to rip my hair out. Dad definitely would have found my missing by now and was probably tearing up the town looking for me. It wouldn't be long before he discovered I'd taken a hex bag, and since I didn't take my phone he couldn't trace my GPS. He wasn't gonna be able to find me, at least not for a little while. Sure, eventually he'd probably figure to call Bobby, or his other contacts- Which would lead up to him talking to Ellen most likely, but I figured I'd have been gone from the Roadhouse by then.

Or, maybe I wouldn't be. Depending on what happened, maybe I'd just stick around that area. Who knows.

When we pulled into the parking lot of the Roadhouse, I said my goodbyes and thanked the couple a million times over before they drove off and left me. In a way I was actually kind of excited about this. I'd heard stories about Ellen and Jo all my life, so it would be nice to meet them and put a face to their names.

So I approached the door and stepped inside. It was past five in the afternoon so the place was completely packed. I knew it was with hunters, because that's what this bar was all about.

My eyes scaled the area before locking onto a middle aged woman that was pouring a shot of something for a man at the bar. I knew that had to be Ellen, judging by how Dad always described her. So I made a b-line straight for her and slid into a bar stool.

She spotted me instantly, and already looked confused. She probably knew every hunter in this place by name, and obviously I'd never been in here before. The one thing I knew without a shadow of a doubt was that hunters were always suspicious, most were extremely untrusting, so naturally this woman wasn't sure what to make of me. But she approached anyhow and gave a wary smile.

"What can I get for you, sweetie?" She asked, with a slight southern drawl that instantly made me smile.

"Are you Ellen?" I asked, instead of answering.

"Depends," She leaned against the counter and eyed me carefully. "Who might you be?"

"I'm a... Friend... Of Sam and Dean Winchester." I replied.

"A friend?" Her brow arched and she smirked slightly. "Your Daddy know you're here, Mary?"

I felt myself scowl as I nervously tapped my hands on the bar. "Nope. How'd you know who I was?"

"Bobby told me about you. Said that because of you comin back here me and my daughter Jo were spared a pretty bad ending, right? And, well- It's kinda obvious you're related to Dean Winchester, hon- You look just like him." She grabbed an empty shot glass and a bottle and sat it down in front of me. "Guess I owe you a drink or two for helpin us out."

She poured me a shot and I quickly downed it. "Thanks, kinda needed that."

"So, what can I do for ya, sweetie? If your Dad doesn't know you're here, then..."

"Please don't call him," I grumbled. "At least not for a little while. I need a break, and I can't have him storming here and dragging me back."

"I take it living the normal life isn't working out for you?" She said, then grabbed her own stool and sat down in front of me. "Bobby told me about that too. That after Lucifer and Michael were killed, Dean left the life. I was happy for him, thought he deserved it. So what's the problem?"

When I poured another shot and downed it, not answering her question she nodded in understanding.

"You got a place to stay?" She asked.

"Not at the moment, no. There's gotta be a motel around here somewhere." I replied.

She pointed over her shoulder. "I got a cot set up in the back, you're welcome to it. At least until you decide you're goin home."

"I'm not going back." I shook my head. "I can't. I was hoping maybe you could help me out with a job of some kind. I know you do that kinda thing."

I never had a Mother, but I figured she was giving me a signature "Mom" face.

"How about," She said. "You stick around here, I can give you somethin to do to earn your keep. I could always use another bartender. Me and Jo get pretty swamped most days. And after you've cooled off from whatever's got you so angry, I'll call your Dad and let him know you're okay. How's that sound?"

Well at least that would give me a little time to sort things out. Even though I had a feeling Ellen wasn't gonna wait around to call Dad. She'd probably do it as soon as my back was turned.

"Alright, deal." I smiled.

"Good. Go throw your bag in the back and I'll show ya the ropes around here." She turned slightly and snapped her fingers to a pretty blonde that was serving drinks at a corner table. "Jo, come on over. We got work to do."

This was definitely gonna be interesting.

* * *

Dean couldn't see straight he was so angry, and it took every ounce of strength not to start screaming. Instead, he took a few deep breaths and focused on the view from the kitchen window, finding that he was actually counting the grass blades out back just to calm himself down.

"Lemme get this straight," He said, clenching his jaw. "You and Mary had a disagreement, and she left?"

Lisa nodded. "Yeah, I told her to go, Dean."

"Why? What coulda happened that you'd actually throw her out of the house?"

She motioned towards the drawer under the coffee pot. "There was three hundred dollars in that drawer yesterday, and now it's gone. I know I didn't take it, and you didn't- Ben wouldn't have, so that leaves Mary. She's the only one that had the opportunity to take it."

"Wait, wait a second," Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. "You're saying she stole it? Mary? That's crazy, Lisa- She wouldn't have stolen anything."

"Regardless if you believe it or not, Dean- That money's gone. So how else would you explain it?"

"You lost it? You spent it and forgot? Anything other than accusing Mary of friggin stealing it!"

She sighed and shook her head. "Why is it so hard for you to believe Mary could actually be capable of that?"

"Why's it so hard for you to believe that she's not?" Dean retorted. "Seriously, Lisa- What do you got against her? She hasn't done anything to you- And do you got any idea the kinda crap that kid's been through since she came back here? All the things that's happened to her with trying to save me and Sammy?" Lisa only looked away, not seeming to be interested. "She's gotten the crap kicked out of her more times than I can count, she got shot twice, the last time killed her. And all that's on me, so maybe that'll tell you why I want her here so bad, right?"

"Mom?" Ben suddenly said, peaking around the kitchen doorway. "Can I... Come in?"

"Ben, you need to go to your room." Lisa replied. "We're talking."

"I know, but... I heard what you were talking about, and..." He stepped in and awkwardly reached into his jeans pocket, then pulled out a wad of cash. "I took the money, not Mary. I'm sorry, it was stupid and I shouldn't of done it... I'm sorry."

Dean instantly glared at Lisa in an "I told you so" manner, and she looked speechless.

"Well, at least that's cleared up," Dean said. "Ben, you can go back to your room now."

Ben laid the money on the counter before running back upstairs.

"All I know," Lisa said, refusing to peel her eyes off the counter where the money sat. "Is that Ben and I don't stand a chance... Not as long as she's here, Dean. I understand she's your daughter..."

"Do you?" Dean interrupted. "Because sometimes I wonder."

"She's your daughter," She went on, sighing. "But she's also grown. She's not a kid anymore. She's capable of making her own decisions and living her own life. It doesn't have to be here with us. If the three of us stand any chance of being a family that it would never work as long as she's here. Because when she is, she's all you see, Dean."

"So what'd you expect me to do, huh?" Dean went on. "You expect me to forget about my kid?"

Lisa shook her head, and leaned against the counter.

"I didn't say that."

"But that's what you're thinkin, right? You expect me to just toss Mary aside and forget about her. Would you do that with Ben? If the situation was reversed? Hell no you wouldn't. And I won't do it, Lisa. I'd never do that." He paused and looked away. "This isn't gonna work, is it? This whole thing."

"I want it to. I really do," Lisa bit back tears. "If Mary comes back... We can figure something out."

Dean pushed away from the counter and headed for the door.

"That's a big if." He finished, then stepped out onto the back porch. "Cas, if you can hear me up there and if you're able, get down here. Mary's gone."

He waited a good thirty seconds before finally hearing the flapping of wings as Cas stood in front of him. Normally he'd have greeted his friend with a hug, but there wasn't time for that now.

"What happened?" Cas asked.

"She took off," Dean answered. "Her and Lisa got into a fight or something yesterday and she left."

"She ran away yesterday?" Cas questioned. "And you've only _just _discovered her missing?"

Dean felt his heart drop to his feet after that question.

"I came home late and went straight to bed, so... Yeah."

Cas cinched his lips and took a step forward.

"I knew this was going to happen." He sighed. "She was showing all of the signs. Dean, are you really going to stand there and tell me that you didn't know how unhappy she was? Even I, the one you call a clueless baby in a trench coat, noticed that she was completely miserable."

"You don't gotta make me feel worse, man. I thought she was happy, she said she was. Hell I asked her more then once and she..."

"Lied." Cas cut him off. "She lied, for you. For _you_, Dean. Because she wanted you to have a different life."

Dean sat on one of the patio chairs and rested his elbows on his knees.

"Fuck. Some hell of a Dad I am, huh? That damn kid, why couldn't have she just told me?" Cas didn't respond to that. "Can you track her down, please? Don't bring her back, just find her and make sure she's okay and then I'll go talk to her."

Cas nodded and disappeared, but returned less than a minute later.

"She's blocked from me. She must've stolen another hex bag." He stated.

Dean flew to his feet after that.

"Fucking perfect. Now what the hell am I supposed to do?"

Cas narrowed his eyes at him. "Perhaps you should have thought of that _before _this happened, Dean."

"Big help, dick. Thanks a lot." Dean stopped when his phone started buzzing in his pocket. Once he saw the unknown number he immediately accepted. "Yeah, hello?"

"Dean, it's Ellen." Came the voice on the other end.

"Ellen? What're you..."

"Mary's here. Now I'm just callin to let you know she's okay and I'm lookin out for her. But I don't think it'd be a good idea if you came and got her yet."

Dean let out a relieved sigh and instantly the knot in his stomach untwisted.

"Why not? I gotta come get her, Ellen." He replied.

"Give it a couple days. Let her cool off some and get her head straightened out. The poor kid's goin through a pretty rough time and if you came now of all times..."

"Yeah," Dean nodded even though she couldn't see it. "I know. She'd probably disappear again. Okay, just keep an eye on her please. Don't let her out of your site for a second."

Ellen chuckled. "You don't have to tell me that. I got a daughter nearly the same age, as weird as that sounds. She'll be okay, I got her busting tables so she's gonna be pretty busy."

"I'm leaving tonight. Just cause she wants a break don't mean I'm not gonna watch her when she's not looking. Keep that between us okay?"

He could head the hustle and bustle of the Roadhouse even from over the phone.

"You got it, honey. Drive safe." Ellen replied the hung up.

After Dean stuffed his phone back in his pocket he nodded to Cas.

"You hear that?"

"Yes," Cas replied gruffly. "At least you know she's somewhere safe."

That might have been true, but that didn't mean Dean felt any better about the situation.


	41. Chapter 41

_**Yet again thanks for all the reviews. I've run out of cookies to give you, so have some gummy worms instead :D**_

* * *

Interesting didn't even begin to describe how it was working at the Roadhouse. Yeah, I'd only been there a day, but so far I'd helped in breaking up three fights between pissed off hunters, caught one asshole trying to steal from the register, and been hit on more times then I could count.

Overall I'd have to say this place was pretty awesome. As crazy as it sounds. It was different, it was something I'd never experienced before. I never had a "normal" job before in my life. Dad would never let me, past and future- So actually running around serving drinks and dealing with drunk grabby hunters might not've been considered a good job to most people, but at least I could say it was something different.

"Hey, Mary-" Jo said, tapping me on the shoulder. "Come here for a second, there's something I want you to listen in on."

I took a quick glance around the bar, and it was relatively quiet for the moment. Ellen had gone out for something, I wasn't sure what- Which left me, Jo, and some guy named Oscar to run the bar.

"Okay, sure." I shrugged, and laid the crate of beer I held on the bar. "What's up?"

She smiled slightly and motioned for me to follow. "In the back, you'll see. Oscar," She looked to the thirty something guy. "You know what to do."

"Right," He said. "Keep my mouth shut."

Okay, weird. But I still followed her through the back and where they kept the extra crates of booze and pretzels. There was a small round table positioned under a light- Where Ellen said a few of her old hunting buddies liked to play private games of poker or something. There was a guy and a girl sitting there now, and there was dozens of papers and newspaper articles scattered across the tabletop. They seemed young, nearly the same age as Jo and me. And if I had to guess I'd say they were brother and sister. They both had equally dark hair and eyes, and while the girl was petite built, the guy was tall and lanky.

"Alright, let's get started." Jo said, then sat down. "This is Mary. She's a hunter so she's cool."

With a quick peak at the newspaper clippings I felt my brow arch. "What's this all about?"

"A job." Jo answered. "Every once in a while some friends of mine pick up on things here and there and pass them my way. If it's worth checking out, then me, Trish and Rick-" She pointed to the strangers. "Take off and handle it. We have to be careful about it though, because if my Mom finds out."

"There'll be hell to pay." Rick finished, chuckling.

"Anyways," Trish rolled her eyes. "Those friends Jo was talkin about caught wind of something coming from an island off the coast of Washington."

She handed me a newspaper article and I scaled it quickly.

"It might not seem like much," Jo said. "Not many out there would think much of it. Bodies turning up washed ashore, they blamed it on boating accidents. Since there's only been three or four every year, I guess no other hunter out there put two and two together." She grabbed some autopsy photos and slid them across to me. "They were drained of blood, but not completely drained, and the marks left on them got chocked up to their bodies thrashing around on rocks or something."

"Huh," I said, sitting down and glaring at the photos. "Funny how they thrashed right on their carotid artery, right? That's not a coincidence. So, what're you thinking, vampires?"

"That's what we figured," Rick answered. "The island is pretty much abandoned up until the tourist season starts which is in July, so it's basically a perfect place for a nest of vamps to haul up on."

"And when they drain their victims they don't drain them completely, probably hoping they wouldn't gain attention from hunters. Either that or they figure dumping them off in the ocean would be enough." Trish added.

I lowered the pictures and newspaper articles and shrugged. "Okay, when do we leave?"

* * *

It was the first time Dean had driven the impala in months, and he had to admit it felt good. He missed it. For a split second as he was coasting down the back roads towards the Roadhouse, he almost forgot that he wasn't hunting anymore. It felt like any regular day, cruising towards a job. He had to admit with that as well, that he missed it.

When he pulled into the empty parking lot of the Roadhouse it was still early, the place hadn't even opened yet and but for a car parked off behind, he didn't figure anyone but Ellen was actually here.

He had rehearsed in his head the entire drive what he was going to say to Mary when he saw her. First off, he knew he had to apologize for everything, that was most important. Then after that came trying to figure something out that would work for everyone. Even though he already knew that living with Lisa and Ben wasn't in the cards anymore. And he definitely didn't wanna do what Lisa wanted him to do, which was forgetting about Mary. Yeah, she might've been an adult, but that didn't change the fact that to him, she was a little girl that needed looking after. Because still, even after everything, all he saw when looking at her was a little helpless kid.

So he climbed out of the impala and stopped next to one of the windows, peaking inside to see if she was there. Right off he didn't see her, the only ones within view was Ellen and some guy she seemed to be reaming.

"Ouch, someone's getting their ass pounded." He said, chuckling as he opened the door.

Ellen stopped screaming at the poor bastard long enough to look over her shoulder. Once she saw Dean she closed her eyes and rubbed her head.

"Sorry if I'm interrupting." Dean said, sneering as he sat down at the bar. "Don't stop on my account though, really. Go on."

"Oscar, go do what I told you. And we're not done talkin about this." Ellen finished.

Dean continued to snicker as the guy fled for his life.

"Wow, so... An employee of yours?" He asked. "Gotta say I don't think I'd like workin here."

Ellen hesitated speaking for a moment, at least until she'd calmed down.

"Dean, listen-" She said after a sigh. "Mary's gone. She took off last night."

And Dean's face fell instantly flat. "Gone? What the hell do you mean gone? Did you tell her I was coming or somethin?"

"No," She shook her head. "Jo must've recruited her. She does this once every couple a months or so. Takes off on a job with some of her friends, doesn't bother to tell me where she's going cause she knows I'll stop her. Mary must've tagged along for this one."

"Son of a bitch..." Dean thumped his hands down on the bar. "What the hell, Ellen? You said you were gonna keep an eye out on her til I got here!"

"Don't yell at me! I did watch out for her, but she ran off late last night after I left to go grab some stuff from the store."

"Awesome, so lemme guess- You got no idea which way she went, or where this supposed job happens to be?"

Ellen nodded and grabbed a newspaper clipping. "All I know is it's some island just off of Washington. What it is yet, I don't know- But I've got some friends looking into it."

Dean scaled over it quickly before standing. "You got a computer I can use?"

"Yeah, in the back. Follow me." Ellen waved him on.

He practically pushed past her and into a small office that was stuffed full of cardboard boxes. There was a laptop pushed against the far end wall on the cluttered desk which he quickly sat down in front of.

"Stupid question," He said as he started typing. "But does Jo got a phone you can track?"

"No, whenever she takes off like this she leaves it behind." She watched over his shoulder as he researched islands around the coast of Washington, and anything strange that might pop up with it. "I'm sorry about this, Dean- I really am. I know it won't make you feel much better but she's not alone out there. Jo's got a pretty good group of hunters that she teams up with. They watch each others backs."

"You're right," Dean replied. "That doesn't make me feel any better. The only one that can watch my kid's back is me."

"Bobby mentioned your angel. Ain't there a way he can track her down?"

"Tried that. Mary stole a hex bag that keeps her invisible. So, I gotta do this the hard way." He fell silent as he read a few articles, then sat back with a grimace. "Vampires, that's what they're goin after. Shit, it had to be a nest of vamps."

He jumped up after that and started back through the bar.

"Well are you gonna need some help out there, Dean?" Ellen asked before he could leave. "I could make a few calls to some friends of mine?"

"No, I got this, Ellen. Thanks." He stopped before opening the door. "Even though I don't think she will, if she happens to call..."

"I'll let ya know." Ellen replied.

With a nod goodbye he left the bar and jumped back in the impala. After he'd peeled out of the drive and started down the road, he pulled Mary's phone from his pocket. He _was_ probably gonna need some help, and he couldn't rely on Cas since he was busy fighting a war in heaven- And Bobby was off doin a job of his own. The only person left was Sam, so he dialed the last known number he had called Mary with.

It rang several times over before Sam finally answered.

"Mary, I told you-" He said with a sigh. "I'm busy and can't talk."

"Dude," Dean said. "It's not Mary, it's me. I need your help."

There was silence for a good few seconds before Sam finally replied. "What's going on?"

"Mary took off, and I know you're off doin whatever the hell it is you're doing, but I need backup with this one. She's with Jo and some other hunters tackling a vamp's nest near Washington. This is too big for her, man- She could get hurt." Yet again there was more silence and Dean shifted his eyes back and forth. "Hello?"

"Yeah I heard." Sam finally replied. "But I can't help, Dean. I'm kinda stuck in my own crap right now. I wouldn't be able to get there in time."

"Are you serious? You can't drop whatever it is you're doin and come help me out with Mary? Remember Mary, Sam? You know, the time traveling daughter of mine that's risked her ass for us a hundred times?"

"I'm clear across the country working my own case, Dean. I'm sorry but I can't help."

It took a good ten seconds for Dean to realize that Sam had actually hung up on him, and once he did he tossed Mary's phone to the seat and floored it. He swore the next thing he did after he got his daughter back was finding Sam and kicking the ever loving crap out of him. It's one thing to take off and ditch them, to act like a douche bag, but it's another when he's _such _a douche bag that he doesn't even give a crap about family- And starts acting all illusive and weird.

Even more so Dean wanted to kick his own ass for ever thinking they could move in with Lisa and Ben and expect everything to be peachy. Not only was it a stupid idea to think they could go civilian, but Sam was out there acting like a nut job, and Mary was so miserable she took off. Of course, Lisa was to blame for that, he knew that now. Maybe leaving the life might've worked out if he never woulda suggested starting things up with Lisa and Ben. Maybe if they had just went back to the bunker, or found some place somewhere else it could've worked. But he had an image in his head, this stereotypical picture of an actual family, with a house and a picket fence, two kids and a dog.

Of course that's all it was though, was just a stereotypical picture. He figured that's what Mary would've expected or wanted, but if he had to be honest he had doubts from the beginning. He tried to convince himself that that life was what he wanted, but now that everything had blown up in his face he couldn't lie to himself anymore.

Mary, Sammy and Cas- Bobby too when he wasn't off running around on his own, that was all the family he needed. Sure, he cared about Lisa and Ben, and if it was another time and place, maybe it could've worked. But not now. Things had changed too much.

So he settled in for the long drive and tried his best to stay calm- Because the thought of Mary out there fighting on her own was about to drive him insane.

* * *

The first thing we did once one of Jo's hunting buddies rented a little boat to take to the island was dust our clothes with ash. It stunk like hell, but I knew already it was something that would prevent the vamps from smelling us once we hit the island.

"What'd you say this was made out of again?" Trish asked, cringing from the smell.

"Saffron, skunk's cabbage and trillium." I answered.

"Where'd you pick up this little trick?" Rick asked now. "Hunters Digest?"

"Ha ha." I scowled. "No, I learned it from my Dad, who else."

"Well at least we know we don't smell like ass for nothing." Jo smiled sarcastically. "If Dean taught you then it's gotta be legit."

Two more of Jo's hunter friends joined us at the boat docks, two guys named Carlos and James, and before long we were zipping across the fog covered water. The island was a good forty minutes from the coast, but we had to take the longer trip to make it to what Rick said was the uninhabited side of the island. According to him the place was still abandoned, but for a few people who worked at some resort. Security guards or something. As far as the vamps, well that was another story. We didn't know where exactly they were held up. But we had maps of the entire island, and any area that could be considered a good place for a nest was pinpointed.

We left the boat in a small cove on the opposite side of the island and started off on foot. I had to admit this place was creepy. It was covered in fog to the point you couldn't see two feet in front of your own face. Not to mention this place was way too big to ever hope to scale in one day. So we separated, groups of two. Me and Jo went one way, while the others went another. Maybe not the best idea in the world, I knew that. The one thing Dad always taught me was you never friggin separate when there's a chance you could be massively outnumbered.

"So what's it like?" Jo asked as we skulked through the trees.

"What's what like?" I replied.

"Having Dean Winchester as a dad." She smirked at me. "That just trips me out."

"Oh," I snickered. "Yeah I think a lot of people feel that way."

"Well what's it like?"

I was careful to watch my footing seeing is that it was so foggy and the forest on this island wasn't exactly tame.

"Normal for me. I mean, he's my Dad, the only one I've ever known, so..."

"I've known him for a few years now and I gotta say he was the last one I'd ever see having a kid. Sam maybe, but definitely not Dean."

"Well I was kind of an accident but yeah you might be right. Sammy does seem more the type for kids and stuff. Still, he's a really good Dad, he tries his ass off to be."

She smiled faintly then stared down at my hip.

"So what's with the hex bag you keep on your belt loop?" She asked now.

"I didn't wanna be found after I took off." We paused under a particularly thick grove of trees. "Do you hear that?"

She stopped and listened. "I don't hear anything."

"Exactly," I nodded. "Completely dead silence. Not even birds chirping."

She started walking again and I followed. "Well that's never a good sign. At least we know we're probably going in the right direction."

Which was why it was all the more stupid that we separated.

"So you afraid the angel is gonna find you?" She went on. "Cause of the hex bag I mean."

"Yeah, Cas has an overprotective nature about him. Sometimes I think he's even worse than Dad. Once he found out I was missing I woulda gave him ten seconds before he zapped away and dragged my ass back."

We kept going until we came to the end of the crude trail we were hiking on. Up ahead was more forest, and what looked like the remnants of an old hunting cabin.

"I thought this side of the island was uninhabited?" I asked.

"So did I." She sighed and pulled her phone from her pocket. "It's time to head back to the rendezvous point and compare notes."

After checking her phone and finding we had no signal, go figure, we started back the way we came.

I dunno if it was karma getting back at me for running away and not telling Dad where I was or what- But everything went to shit in a matter of minutes.

Once we hit the rendezvous point it didn't take long for Jo and me to hear screaming, which sent us to a full sprint through the trees until we came to a small hillside that overlooked a clearing.

Once I saw all the blood below I quickly grabbed Jo's arm and yanked her down to the ground behind a fallen tree.

We both peaked over and stared down at the rampage below.

One or two vamps had already lost their heads, while Carlos and Rick were laying shredded on the ground. Trish and James were bound and gagged while the remainder of the vamps, which were four big ass guys, started dragging them off into the trees.

Jo immediately tried to jump up but I grabbed her arm again.

"Wait," I whispered. "There's too many of them and who knows how many more they got waiting for them in the trees."

"So we just let Trish and James die?"

"No, think about it, Jo-" I went on. "Why is it that there's only three or four bodies found every year, huh? With a whole nest they should be draining dozens. What does that tell you?"

She was out if breath from the sprint, and her hair was stuck to random parts of her face from the humidity- still even though she was panicking I could see the gears turning in her head.

"They," she said, nodding. "They keep their victims alive. They drain them slowly over long periods of time?"

"Exactly, which means for the moment they're not gonna kill em."

She swallowed. "So, what do we do?"

"We shouldn't have separated and we sure as hell can't go at this alone." I cringed and gripped the hilt of my machete. "And of course we can't fucking call anyone for help cause we got no god damned signal, and Cas won't come. He's fighting a war..."

I finally stood, but stayed low as I started down the hill with Jo following. Now wasn't the time to freak out. I needed to remember everything my Dad taught me.

What did I know so far? That the vamps weren't killing their meals right off, and at the moment they couldn't smell Jo or me, so that meant we could probably follow. But not at too close a distance, because vamps had super hearing. Their nest was probably close by, judging by the complete silence in the forest. Animals could sense predators, obviously. The silence meant everything.

I saw four vamps right off, not counting the two dead ones in the clearing. Considering they only killed three or four victims a year, that meant their nest couldn't have been a very big one. Maybe six, seven at the most. It was gonna be hairy, but if we were careful and watched each others backs- Me and Jo stood a half way decent chance of getting in and out alive. If we could free Trish and James, our odds would go up, depending on their physical conditions.

I remembered by Dad told me he cleared practically an entire mansion full of vamps all by himself. Of course, that was Dad, and he was a helluva lot better hunter than I could ever be.

But we followed as closely as possible without being heard until they stopped at the back doors of a huge stone building. At first glance it looked like it could have been a home back in the day- But now it was so overgrown with vines and plants it didn't look like much of anything anymore. Still, it was big which kind of made my stomach drop. If it was a small nest of vamps, they wouldn't need such a huge place. But I guess there was always a chance that they just took whatever shelter they could find out here.

They dragged Trish and James through the door, then slammed it behind them.

"Okay, spur of the moment plan," I whispered. "Since we don't got the time to scope the place, I say we wait it out til morning and then go in. They sleep through most of the day. We'd stand a better chance that way."

Jo nodded. "Maybe so, but... I don't like the thought of leaving Trish and James in there with them for that long."

"Me either, but if we go in there now when they're all awake and hungry, we're screwed. It's just the two of us, so we gotta have some kind of strategy behind this. At least if they're asleep we might be able to sneak around em."

"Especially since they can't smell us, yeah." She nodded again. "You might be right."

It was already late, past six I figured- Which meant sundown wasn't far off. So we settled in for a long damp night in the trees.

Everything was still dead silent outside, and no vamps came in or out of the house since Jo and me got there, which was a good sign I guess. At least more of em weren't popping outa the forest.

Some might wonder why I didn't at least try to call Cas down. But I think I was looking to prove myself some. I wanted to prove to myself that I could make it on my own, that I didn't have to depend on Dad or anyone, since it was clear that I wasn't gonna have Dad anymore. At least not in the way I used to. Yeah, I knew he'd still be in my life, but things had changed. He was normal now, a civilian- With an almost wife and step son. He had other responsibilities now, not just me. So yeah, maybe it would've been easier to call Cas down, easier and smarter, but I just couldn't do it.

Technically I couldn't even if I wanted to. With my hex bag he wouldn't be able to hear my prayers, and I couldn't burn it out here so near a vamp nest and take the risk of them smelling the smoke. Vamps and their damn bloodhound noses. Throwing it away wouldn't do any good, cause the radius on those puppies spread for miles.

So we waited, all night, and listened to the eerie quiet. And finally dawn came and went and still all was silent in and around the house. I hadn't really fought against many vamps, but I knew they were asleep by the time the sun was shining, and awake just as it was about to set. Seeing is that the sun was blaring through the treetops, I figured now was as good a time as any to go in.

So I nudged Jo and motioned towards the house and she followed after me.

We were as quiet as possible as we approached the backdoor, careful not to step on any broken glass or garbage littering the yard.

"You still got your syringes?" I asked.

She nodded and motioned to her jacket. "Right here."

"Be ready, I'll go first."

We had two syringes each of dead mans blood, which wouldn't go very far. But if was better than nothing, and we still had our machetes. Which in my opinion was a million times better. Why bother poisoning em if you can just slice off their heads, right? Still if you were in close combat and couldn't swing it then the syringes came in handy for a quick fix.

The backdoor wasn't even closed completely- Which to me meant, one, either they knew there were more hunters on the island and were leaving it easy to lure us and trap us, or two, they had enough people inside so they didn't feel it was necessary to actually close and lock the door. Either way we could've been screwed. Still, I pushed the door open carefully and stared down a long dark hallway.

At least there wasn't any signs of vamps right off, but if they were sleeping I hoped that meant they were all locked in rooms upstairs. Not that this kind of thing was ever easy, I knew that Trish and James weren't going to just be laying in the middle of the floor with no vamps around them what so ever- Cause seriously, when do hunters ever get that lucky?

As much as I didn't want to admit it, I was probably a little rusty. Cause not only had I been babied since I came back in time, Dad wouldn't let me help out much with jobs, but now I had months behind me where I'd been sitting on my ass not doing much of anything. Still, it felt good to be on a job again- I didn't realize how much I'd missed it til now. No, not the worrying about your friends dying part, I could've done without that, but the adrenaline rush and anticipation was what I missed. It was easy to pretend I could be normal, but deep down I always knew I never would be and it'd never work. I was a hunter, and months pretending to have a normal life wasn't gonna change that.

But so far there wasn't much to see in this place, except for cracked tiled floors, dingy walls and darkness. The windows had either been boarded over to void out the light, or were covered by dusty blankets. And don't get me started on the smell, it was pretty damn bad.

The hallway we walked down had several closed doors, and I hoped that didn't mean behind each one was a sleeping vamp. By the time we reached the end we came to a large open room with high vaulted ceilings and a massive marble fireplace that was fully ablaze. Tied to the center of the room was Trish and James, who seemed to be knocked out cold.

I motioned for Jo to check them while I inspected the room and an open staircase leading to the second level.

It was way too quiet in here, which was giving me all sorts of bad feelings. Something was gonna go wrong, it was completely obvious.

For the moment though the area was clear, so I darted over to give Jo a hand. Trish and James had been roughed up, but overall they were gonna be okay. And they were starting to come to once we cut the ropes from their ankles and wrists.

"Can you walk?" I whispered.

"Y-Yeah," Trish grunted. "Think so."

We helped lug them to their feet and started back for the hallway when shit hit the fan. It's like they just emerged from out of no where and pounced. Jo was tackled to the ground first and I didn't even think before I lunged and with a quick swipe of my machete his head went rolling. I pulled her back up and instinctively blocked them.

"Get them outa here, Jo." I said, watching as the remaining three vamps lined up in front of us.

Thank god there wasn't more than three, but that didn't mean they weren't gonna be a challenge. Especially since they were eying us like we were four walking Happy Meals. Trish and James weren't in fighting shape, they could barely stand, so I guarded the entrance of the hallway and reached back and pushed them.

"Go." I repeated. "Get them out of here, now."

Jo didn't wanna ditch me, I knew that- But we had two wounded people with us. So she backed away slowly helping Trish and James down the hallway towards the exit. I stayed, with my machete raised and eyeballing each vamp in front of me. One made a move but I swung, barely missing his neck as he flinched backwards. Once I heard the backdoor open and closed, and I knew they at least had gotten out of here safely I let out a relieved sigh and sprung into action.

I didn't think, I just attacked, whatever fear I might've been feeling was pushed aside because it had to be. What mattered was making sure Jo and the others got outa there safely. When you're thrust into that situation from out of no where you sort of go into a daze. All I remember is blood spray and heads rolling. Two of the vamps were dead, but the last guy wasn't so easy. He slammed against me and my machete went flying. I guess taring my throat out wasn't what he wanted right now, and instead he opted for wrapping his hands around it and squeezing.

I always considered myself strong for a girl, I wasn't dainty or petite and usually I could kick a guys ass just as must as the next person, but this vamp was huge, and combine that with their unnatural strength I was screwed. Since I didn't have my machete my hands flailed out and towards my jacket pocket where the syringes sat. My fingers just grazed it when he reached down with a free hand and latched onto my wrist.

Thankfully he stopped strangling me for the moment, but decided that grabbing a handful of my hair and slamming the back of my head down against the floor was better. That did me in as the room started spinning.

Out of the shadows came a second figure that tackled the vamp on top of me with a screech. I couldn't see straight but what I could see was them rolling across the floor before, I realized it was Dad. He grabbed the nearest thing close to him which was a fireplace poker and jammed it through the vamps chest pinning him to the floor. Then didn't wait around before he grabbed his machete and sawed the fuckers head off. A few disgusting crunches and gurgles later and the entire thing was over.

I forced myself to sit up and shook off the dizziness as he rushed over and scooped me up.

"Are you okay?" He asked, crushing me with one of his usual hugs.

"Yeah," I muttered. "I'm fine, Dad. What the hell are you doin here? How'd you find me?"

He pulled away and helped me to my feet. "That's a stupid question. Did you forget who I am?"

"Yeah I guess that was a stupid question," I rubbed my head. "Shit... Jo and the others..."

I started for the door but he yanked me to a stop. "They're good. I ran into them outside, it's cool." He took a good look at the blood bath in the room. "Damn, remind me not to piss you off, kid."

Yeah, I didn't realize until now that it was a gory mess in there.

"Okay, so get it over with-" I said. "Yell at me for takin off like I did."

He stared down at me then shook his head. "No, we're not talking about this til we're off this damn island. So, let's go."

Shit... Yeah I was gonna get it good, I knew that. I knew it from the beginning when I took off without telling him where I was going. I knew he was gonna yell and scream at me for ever going on a hunting job without him. This wasn't gonna be fun.

He kept his hand gripped on my arm as he led me out of the house. We eventually met up with Jo and her friends and made it back to the boat- And the ride back was tense and awkward. By the time we made it back to the docks, Dad continued to keep his hand on my arm as he led me to where he parked the Impala, I was nearly ready to snap at him to just start yelling already. The silence was driving me nuts.

"Sit," He said, pointing to the hood. "I'm gonna check you out."

I sat down and he grabbed the first aid kit from the trunk before stomping over and carefully searching through my hair on the back of my head.

"Hey, Dean-" Jo said. "Listen, uh... Go easy on her, okay? She saved my ass back there. She saved all our asses."

Dad barely passed a glance at her before nodding. "See ya around, Jo."

She flinched slightly before giving me a wave, then climbing back in the truck with Trish and James and taking off.

Once they were out of site I let out a sigh.

"Oh my god just get it over with already," I said. "You're pissed, I get it, so just start cussing at me."

He blotted the back of my head with an antiseptic soaked cotton ball before tossing it away.

"It doesn't look bad. Just some bumps, mainly. Least you won't need stitches back there." He said.

I scowled at him. "Is this some kind of psychological thing? Make me stew in my own shame and fear before you finally ream me? Just do it, say you're pissed at me, yell at me- Do something."

"I'm not pissed at you." He replied.

"Okay, then what? Disappointed? Annoyed, there's gotta be some reason why you're giving me the silent treatment."

He sat beside me. "Is that what you think it is?"

"Isn't it? I ran away, right?"

"No you didn't. Lisa threw you out. There's a difference." He blew out a huff air. "Look, I'm just gonna say all this all at once. I'm sorry, for everything. I shoulda known there was somethin going on and I didn't, I should've put a stop to it a long time ago. After I caught Lisa that day with you in the kitchen trying to get you to move out I shoulda realized it wasn't gonna get any better. All that's on me, Mary- I know that now, so I'm sorry."

Wait, what? He was apologizing? For what exactly? I was the one that ran off and did all this shit behind his back.

"I... It's not really your fault that you didn't notice. I lied to you about..."

"Exactly," He nodded. "You lied to me, you faked being happy there just so I wouldn't have to leave. You should've told me from the get go that you didn't like it there. I would've done something about it."

"I didn't want you to do anything about it. I still don't."

"Tough shit. I'm done with you fucking up your own life just so mine could be different. I'm not letting that happen anymore. We're done with that."

I went stiff and couldn't bring myself to look at him. "So, what're we gonna do then? What are you gonna do?"

"We'll figure that out on the road." He jumped off the hood.

"Well, wait," I followed and grabbed his hand. "Dad, I love you and all, but I can't go back there. That's not my life, I can't live with them anymore."

"I know," He nodded. "We're not goin back."

"We... We're not? What about Lisa and Ben?"

"Mary," He sighed. "The night you took off I didn't even know you were gone cause as soon as I came home I went straight to bed. Lisa didn't even bother to tell me you weren't there til I got up the next morning and noticed you didn't come out for breakfast. When I saw your dresser was empty and all your shit was gone, _that's_ when she finally decided to tell me she'd asked you to go." Now it seemed he couldn't meet my eyes. "And yeah sure, that's bad I know- But, I can't really blame Lisa for me not knowin you were gone. I shoulda noticed that myself, but I didn't. So what I'm getting at is that I realized that living there was turning me into something I didn't like. It was making me... It was makin me neglect the most important person in my life, and I can't have that."

Now I couldn't look at him as I was slammed with a ton of guilt. "But, you liked your life there..."

"Maybe, and don't get me wrong I still care about Lisa and Ben, but- I also realized that I was living a lie. Ya know, getting up, going to a normal job, coming back to pizza nights and camping out in front of the tv. All of that might've been okay in another life. But not this one. It didn't feel right anymore, so I broke it off with Lisa. I told em both goodbye and that I wasn't coming back."

I couldn't move after he told me that, I could only stand there staring at him in surprise.

"But... It's because of me that..."

"No," He cut me off. "I just had a choice to make and I chose you. It's as simple as that." He watched me for a good minute, since I couldn't seem to form words. "Ya know, call me crazy, but I thought you'd be happier about that."

"It's not that I'm not happy, but... I don't want you to regret making that decision later and then end up resenting me."

He put his arm around me and led me to the passenger door. "That ain't gonna happen, kid."

Yeah but who the hell knows if he was being truthful about that. Right at the moment it might seem like he was, and surprising enough there didn't seem to be any sadness in his eyes. But who the knows how long that would last, or what might happen when my back was turned. For all I knew I could turn around and there that sadness would be, and I would never know it.


End file.
